>>3914354
Fuck yeah, Garrelf!

Fuck yes Garelf you are the best elf ever

Capture the new girl for interrogation.

>>3914354
Disarm new girl with GARness.

I wonder if Gnome is disappointed that we killed her when he went through all the trouble to name her and make a capability card...

>>3914380
I at the very least disapprove. Simply because it was the most evil thing we've done so far.

>>3914380
She shouldn't have been such a BITCH then.

>>3914385
killing a god and giving its power to SATAN wasn't?

>>3914385
We've beheaded an elf with a door, and THIS is the most evil act we've done?

>>3914391
This was more personal kind of evil. Like, compare burning a city to torching a single little girl.

>>3914394
No, that was just cool.

>>3914396
oh the whole "one death is a tragedy, a million is a statistic" thing.

>>3914403
Exactly.

>>3914394
Elves are tree-hugging faggots. They all deserve to die in such horrible fashions.

This isn't even an evil act, this is neutral at best.

We can't be sure she wouldn't come back, and she's already PERMANENTLY (in non-magic terms) blinded our companion AND tried to kill us.

MILLION OF ELVES DIED IN THE ELFCAUST

Question the girl.

>>3914365
>>3914370
The girl drops her weapon out of shock, and falls to her knees. Garrelf quickly remedies the situation.

>>3914380
I have a notebook full of NPCs to pull from, at least half with stats jotted in the margin next to them. Yeah, I liked Nevada, but I'll live.

Enslave loli.

Also I'm done for the time being.

>>3914423
take her and beardbeard to the windmill. Get some healing using [see image]

>>3914410
Its murder in cold blood. Garrelf is an Evil person - just not outright maniacal. Like a sociopath - he knows of emotion, but doesn't really have any of his own. At least, not anymore, now that he's a shadar-kai.

Being a being of shadow rather than real-stuff has some disadvantages.

Eh, worst case scenario we can just resurrect Nevada later.

Revolving door of death. We're good.


But only if her death is bad for OUR survival.

>>3914438
So does he love the elf queen then, or only taking advantage of her for prestige and hot sex?

>>3914436
Garrelf Expresses is now at full capacity, and sets course for Aldwin's Windmill!

>>3914449
It'd be better to say "he doesn't dislike it." He doesn't care either way, but it doesn't hurt him any (and actually helps him), so he plans to go along with it. Really, the detachment is why this image looks so one sided. Garrelf is downright bored.

>>3914449
That was kinda Aldwin's fault.
LUST card, and all.

>>3914453
Would you say the Garrelf Express is on a... [spoiler]railroad?[/spoiler]

>>3914468
Being a shadar-kai, I can imagine them having quite an interesting sex life.

When we get to the windmill, make sure Cultist only cures the ONE eye, we don't want to mess up our gem-eye

Cultist answers the door very excitedly! But then seems disappointed upon discovering who it is.

Garrelf assumes Aldwin must not be home. No matter.

>>3914515
>Cultist

FUCK YES MUTANT EYE

>>3914515
Poor Cultist.

No matter, have her heal Beardbeard.

>>3914515
>Aldwin, I-

...baked hyuu a cake? MADE WITH KAY-OSS AND LOVE!

>>3914515
If she starts asking questions about your new companion, tell her she's an evil trickster and should not be trusted, no matter what she says. She'd kill you all in a blink of an eye if she got the chance.

>>3914515
Greet her and say beard is in need.

>Learn about Goldmoon.
>Inform that bitch that she'd better back off your drinking buddy
>Kill her if warranted

>>3914468
Female Tits? Surprised am I.

Cultist hears out your need for healing, and volunteers rather quickly, without asking for payment. She seems unexpectedly helpful. Garrelf is unsure why, but does not question good fortune.

Cultist asks Beardbeard if he wants Xom's healing, or regular healing. "Hwance per dhay, Hwee cahn hhheal withhout mhyutation," she explains.

Lily seems upset with something.

Cultist does not ask about the hostage.

>>3914515
>Beardbeard being blinded by a small child
>XOM FINDS THIS HILARIOUS

>>3914564
Regular. We have well enough mutations already.

>>3914564
Xom's healing. He wouldn't do anything to really fuck us, would he?

>>3914564
hmm.. mutant eye or normal eye

Tough choice. No really, that wasn't sarcasm.

I vote for mutant eye. Whats the worst that could happen?

>>3914575
>He wouldn't do anything to really fuck us, would he?

ANONYMOUS is being naively optimistic.
Xom finds this hilarious!

>>3914564
How old is Lily, by the way? Was it ever mentioned?

Tell us the ages of other characters as well. Would be nice to know them.

Question. Does Xom have Paladins?

Eye wound healed! This, of course, means the gaping neck wound will need to be healed by the regular mutatey method... with fun results.

Eyes on the back of your head, fuck year.

Cultist asks if everything is to Beardbeard's satisfaction.

Mutant eye like Ruby's third eye?

Ask Lily what's upsetting her.

Unless her /tg/ powers are active now. In which case, Lily, what the fuck is wrong with you?

>>3914601
Do they work?

>>3914601
>Eye wound healed! This, of course, means the gaping neck wound will need to be healed by the regular mutatey method... with fun results.

FFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFF

>Cultist asks if everything is to Beardbeard's satisfaction.

SHOULD'VE MENTIONED THAT WOUND YOU MOTHERFUCKER GNOME JUST AS PLANNED

>>3914601
That face made me d'awww.

>>3914602
CJOPAZE FHTAGN

>>3914603
Lily is clearly upset by the fact that Garrelf is holding hostage one of Goldmoon's assassins, whom she undoubtably knows and is pissed off by this.

But she should get over it, bitches should have known better than to fuck with Beardbeard.

Garrelf is being really smart by holding the girl hostage... it'd be troublesome to have the Guild up in his shadow anus.

>>3914609
Unfortunately, no, your neck-eye seems as vestigial as the wings that crown it. Your regular eye works fine however.

>>3914603
>Ask Lily what's upsetting her

"Cultist is pregnant."

>>3914618
It's PERORGA now.

>>3914643
>Preggers

>>3914643
._.

>>3914643
>"Cultist is pregnant."

WHOAH

Aldwyn is father, isn't he?

>>3914643
Interesting, this means time has passed since our last adventure.

How much time?

>>3914643
So... Will the child have Xom's mutations from its mother? Or are those earned by personal deeds, not heritage? Here's hoping it's latter.

>>3914643
>implying Aldwin got laid
wat

>>3914643
...why would this upset Lily

Unless the little bitch had her own designs on Aldwin

In which case, LOL

>>3914659
4 days, foo, can't you read threads?

>>3914643
Neither Beardbeard nor Garelf give a shit.

Let's go cruising the forest for monsters!

>>3914680
So how much time since the last time Aldwin and Cultist were together? It's been a bit longer since that, hasn't it? Takes time to travel and all.

>>3914686
>Let's go cruising the forest for monsters

LETS FIND HUMBABA AND SLAY THE SHIT OUT OF HIM FOR NO REASON

>>3914643
Congratulate Cultist.

>>3914705
Despite likely not meaning it.

It's good to keep the only cleric who would ever heal us happy.

Let's go find something in the forest we haven't found before. Preferably something we can wear the skin of, like displacer beasts or gnolls.

Garrelf thanks Cultist for her help, and he and Beardbeard leave. Cultist waves goodbye, and asks them to stop in any time.

>>3914723
>>3914704
>>3914686
We're still on a quest, remember?

>>3914732
Which was?

Wait
Shit.

Go back there.

Lily, has there been any news about Beardbeard lately that would get a hit placed on him?

>>3914738
FUCK GOLDMOON'S SHIT UP!


Also I am starting to see why Aldwin will end up pissed at Beardbeard.

>>3914742
...he killed a god. Since his name changed, wouldn't you assume most people are aware of this?

>>3914738
Stop Satan's arm.

>>3914742
THIS

>>3914754
Under normal circumstances? Maybe.

What the fuck, why did /tg/ just die? Anyway, let's go stop that Satan arm.

>>3914742
Oh Beardbeard can guess any number of reasons.

Killing a god. Stealing a priest's clothing. Wiping out a temple. Removing Aordor from the map. He hasn't been a saint.

>>3914420
Garrelf goes back to this idea. What to ask her? She seems to have calmed down, but is still very resentful and depressed.

>>3914786
Yes. I'm sure he can.

I can guess one that isn't listed, so put my fears to rest, will you?

>>3914786
Ask her about who sent the assassin, so that you might kill her for revenge and in order to ensure that there would be less killers sent after you from now on.

>>3914788
Plus, if we find out WHY he's got a hit on him, we can understand WHO placed the hit.

>>3914790
She refuses to talk.

>>3914786
Remind her that you were acting on self-defense, when you killed her friend/associate/lover/don'tcare. Killing her might have been a bit over-the-top, but she'd've just come after you later, this time better prepared: It was just so much easier to end it right there and now.

Also make it clear that you can kill her just as easily if she doesn't cooperate. And that as a shadar-kai, you know some very effective torture methods.

>>3914806
Tell her you will do everything in your power to resurrect Nevada if she does.

She doesn't have a lot of options.

>>3914806
Show her how... glorious you are. MUTATIONS AND ALL BABY!

Terrify that bitch.

Why did we so easily ignore the fact that Lily said that CULTIST IS PREGNANT?! WHEN THE FUCK DID THAT HAPPEN?!

>>3914806
Do the most dorfy thing possible.

Get her drunk.

>>3914815

We'll deal with that in Aldwin's section, this is BEARDBEARD TIME

>>3914813
>Show her your GLORY!
She silently weeps.

Garrelf tells you to stop trying and let him handle this.

>>3914815
It's just neither interesting nor relevant for Beardbeard and Garrelf. But it will be explained in the next Quest, which will center upon Aldwin again, I'm sure.

>>3914806

Offer to resurrect Nevada using Cultist's help if she talks.

(DO NOT MENTION THAT THIS IS A CLERIC OF XOM, AS THAT WILL RUIN THE HILARIOUS SURPRISE)

>>3914815
Well... When an overly optimistic ma and a chaos cultist fall in love, and the man puts his penis into the chaos cultist's vagina (i won;t go into detail because, frankly, i don;t know how chaos cultists' bodies work) sometimes a sperm gets to an egg, and a baby starts to form!

>>3914824

Have Garrelf whisper something too terrible to hear into her ear, something only a being of shadow would be willing to do?

>>3914824
Good, now threaten her with torture. Start by explaining in great gruesome detail exactly what you're going to do to her if she doesn't talk.

>>3914824
Did... Did Beardbeard just flash at her?

I say we get her drunk, show her what SWELL dudes we are, then offer to res her lesbo-girlfriend.

>>3914841
I second this. Beardbeard is known for two things, killing, and ressurection. And we haven't ressurected anything lately.

Indeed. Offer to resurrect her friend if she offers to cooperate. If not, well, Nevada will be left to the crows. Which would she want more?

>>3914836
>>3914837
Mmm torture.

With a few words, Garrelf has her more unnerved than she has ever been in her entire life. That she hasn't said a word yet is rather impressive.

>>3914862

Gee, sure looks like RAPETIME in here.

>>3914862
Tell her that not ONLY will she not get tortured to death, but she'll be able to play with her little friend again, if she helps us.

>>3914862

That's what you get for low charisma.

Look at that fucker, god damn. Try to intimidate after that.

>>3914862
Man, I love his face.

Give her some time to get over the initial shock. When she stops whimpering, start the interrogation.

>>3914824
Kill her then use stories-bones-tell.

>>3914856

This post made me think Beardbeard would eventually become the god who controls death, like a Judge of the Dead sort of thing who has the power to give life and take it away

>>3914862
OFFER HER SOME GODDAMN WHISKEY

>>3914880

No, No, No.

Gods of death, judges or those who reside over the death have no power over life or dead. They merely judge the faithless and the false if they were good/evil during their live. Those with pantheon get what they deserve from their own god.

Sucks to be a banite huh?

>>3914872
Now that she is thoroughly unnerved, Garrelf decides to go the resurrection route. "We'll bring back your girlfriend if you cooperate, alright?"

She shakes even more.

>>3914902
Looks like she starts to get ready.

Ask about Goldmoon.

>>3914902

For fucks sakes, someone use charm, mind control or emotion despair already.

>>3914902
>bitches don't know 'bout my lesbian Halflings

>>3914902
Fine then.

Tell her that no matter what she says, Nevada will be resurrected. On your word.

Then tell her WHO will be resurrecting if she doesn't cooperate. Maybe the idea of her (whatever she is) living the rest of her life as a mutant might be a little bit of a deterrent.

But if you help us out, we will see to it that she gets resurrected by a less chaotic cleric.

>>3914902
So Gnome, was she Nevada's girlfriend initially, or did she become one only when we decided that they were together?

>>3914902

Now smell her a little.

>>3914902

If she does not cooperate.

Kill, resurrect, kill, resurrect and kill then resurrect her again.

Continue until you get promotions.

>>3914902
Won't talk? Wow, she must really have wanted her dead.

>>3914905
One is a berserker and the other is a coldblooded shadow fay. Neither of em is exactly the spellcaster type.

>>3914910

God damn it faptau get out of here.

.. wait, that's not a bad idea.

>>3914919
THIS

"Oh, so you don't want her to live? All right, I can understand that. You must really hate her."

>>3914910
Faptau? What are you doing up at this hour?

>>3914902

"You know magic can do terrible, HORRIFIC things to a person, living or dead."

"Or, it can do really GOOD things, like bringing the dead back to life, and healing wounds. You'd like that wouldn't you."

"If you tell us what we need to know, we can use the GOOD magic, otherwise I'm afraid our only recourse will be to use the OTHER kind. You understand that's the choice is in your hands, right?"

OKAY I'LL TALK STOPPIT GET HIM AWAY FROM ME

>>3914902
Explain the concept of ressurection spells to her.

>>3914910

GOD DAMN IT FAPTAU, THIS IS LAST TIME YOU FAP IN ME THREADS.

>>3914936

DELICIOUS TEARS

>>3914936
FUCK YES

>>3914936

Oh god that's hilarious

>>3914936
I lol'd

>>3914931
Fapping.

Duh.

>>3914936
Garrelf gets thousand Awesome points and million Creepy points. *Ding!*

Garelf is the only creepy awesome motherfucking Elf of this magnitude.

>>3914931
Wait. You meant "up" as in, "awake", right? Right?

>>3914936

Well now that she'll talk we need to know who put the hit on us and why

>>3914968
He's not an elf.

>>3914936
Obviously, ask why Beardbeard is the target of assassination attempts.

Also ask if she would like her friend back.

>>3914790
>who sent the assassin?

"I-I don't know! M-m-ms. Nevada *sob* took the contract, I was just being shown the ropes! I'm n-n-new! P-p-please don't touch me..."

>>3914985

Molest her for more information.

>>3914985
What contract?

Any reason why?

>>3914985
Demand the location of Nevada's safehouse

>>3914985
Approach threateningly.

>>3914985

"Explain Goldmoon"

>>3914985
Ask what she knows about Beardbeard.

If she knows he killed a GOD.

Also if she'd like a beer.

Ask why there's a contract on Beardbeard's head (as if we don't know already)

>>3914975
>Why is he being targetted?

"B-b-because he's evil! The G-g-g-goldmoon slayers punish evil!"

>>3914994
>>3914988
"ahhh ahhhhhh eeeeeehhhh p-p-please no... ;w; I'll say anything, please d-d-don't come closer..."

>>3915005
Ask again why people want him dead.

>>3915005
Ask her to tell Beardbeard she loves him.

What? She said she'd say anything.

>>3915005
"So who's this Goldmoon?" Take another step closer.

There's probably more information at Nevada's safehouse than what her lackey can give. Tell her to take us there.

>>3915005

Get a massive boner and get close.

Really, really close.

Go get Nevada's corpse, to make sure no one gets it before yo can resurrect her. A wise idea me thinks.

>>3915027
Second.

>>3914996
>Goldmoon = ?
"G-goldmoon is the leader's name! She's a g-great lady... eeeeehh go awaaaay!"

>>3915009
>Why want to kill him?
"B-b-because he's bad!"

>>3915027
>>3915019

Get corpse, go to hideout

>>3915032
Start walking back to Nevada's corpse. Make her come along.

Ask her why Beardbeard is bad.

>>3915032
>"B-b-because he's bad!"

"Yes, and he's right there, and getting impatient. So cough up something useful, or you'll see exactly how bad we can be."

>>3915032

Take her as a hostage or as a kitchen appliance. Get the corpse and go to the hideout

>>3915032
Ask if she believes everything that's hand-fed to her like that.

Imply in a rude fashion that she is incapable of thinking for herself and that they've been running roughshod over her.

>>3915027
>>3915029
"I'll be right back."

As soon as Garrelf teleports away, she falls to her knees and cries.

>>3915055
Offer her a drink.

>>3915048
"Perhaps you have been manipulated...? Maybe this Goldmoon is really a lot more evil than we are...?"

(Yeah sure, tell her to stop getting manipulated, while manipulate her even more at the same time.)

>>3915055
say hi

>>3915055
I feel bad for this girl... we should AT LEAST pay for her therapy or booze after this.

>>3915055
Comfort her. With offers of drink.

>>3915055

Get her some delicious dorf alcohol.

>>3915057
This.

She'll be more useful if she's not crying hysterically all the time. Not to mention that people might misinterpret if they see you walking with a crying kid. A beer will make her happier, as it makes you.

>>3915061
Hey, we offer to resurrect her friend. That's not a small thing ya know.

>>3915057
"Ale?" Beardbeard offers. He almost feels sorry for the girl - Garrelf is creepy.

>>3915072
BOND WITH GIRL

PROTECT FROM GARRELF(?)

So what alignment is Beardbeard?

I'm thinking Lawful evil.

>>3915079
And milk for info!

I wonder... is this the first time BEARDBEARD has felt... remorse?

>>3915072
BRACE FOR DRUNKEN SEX

>>3915082

Gnome confirmed that Beardbeard is Chaotic evil.

>>3915084
Pretty much yes.

She doesn't seem to appreciate the alcohol as much as you would hope.

>>3915072

Sit down and talk with her.

>>3915082
Lawful evil... LAWFUL?!
HE WORSHIPS XOM!
HE IS CHAOTIC EVIL INCARNATE!

>>3915082
Chaotic Evil.

>>3915079
moar like good dorf/ bad shadar-kai

>>3915072
wow, I think that's one of the few times BEARD has spoken quietly.

>>3915082

Chaotic Evil, we've been fucking shit up for no reason since the first thread.

>>3915087
BASED UPON MY MOTIVATIONAL

I ALSO MADE THE NEUTRAL EVIL GARRELF IN THE BEGINNING OF THIS THREAD

I RULE

>>3915089

Try to impress her or something.

Show how big your beard is.

>>3915089

Show he some tricks to calm her down, like disintegrating rocks with your eye

>>3915089
The ale doesn't help if you just sit there and not drink it.

Offer friendship. Mention that we ressurected Garrelf once(do not mention that it was us who killed him). We'd do anything for a friend.

>>3915090
"So, eh... What's yer name?" Beardbeard doesn't know the last time he's had to... ugh... make small talk.

"Mado." She replies.

>>3915118
Warn her that Garelf is PROBABLY goign to pop out of nowhere with Nevada's HEAD, and he prepared for it.
Also, drink the booze, it makes everything better.

>>3915118
BEARDBEARD BEING CIVILIZED

STOP THE FUCKING PRESSES, HOLD THE PHONE, CALL THE PRESIDENT

Garrelf is more twisted than I thought.

>>3915118
"Mado. That's a nice name." (You genuinely think that.) "My name's Beardbeard. Nice to meet ya."

Try to make her think that you're not evil after all, and that Goldmoon was manipulating her all along. Promise her you'll protect her from Garrelf.

>>3915118

Ask her why the hell he had to do this job in the first place.

"Hi Mado! My name's Beardbeard Godslayer. I enjoy bathing in blood, mindless slaughter and causing chaos!"

>>3915118

1.) Why join the assassin's guild in the first place?

2.) Why go along on a mission if you're just a newbie?

3.) How does one usually get out of Goldmoon's death warrants?

4.) Is Nevada the type of person who will appreciate being brought back to life, or is she more likely to just attack us again?

>>3915128
Why does he look like Spock?

>>3915105
"Hey, watch this!" Using the STONE OF IONUS, Beardbeard makes a small crater!

Someone should explain to Goldmoon that if she can just set Beardbeard in the right direction, he'll kill everything in his path and she might be able to use him to great effect.

This where illusionist would come in handy.

Come on, it's easier to talk with someone with couple charm person spells..

>>3915143
Because Spock was also creepy as hell.

>>3915144
Fuck yeah I didn't know we could do that!

(also the thread is autosaging)

>>3915144

Wait for a reaction, then try to talk why the hell she was thrown into slayer biznizz in the first place.

>>3915164

Yup, our stone Satan gave us disintegrates rock and stone on touch

>>3915128
"Your resistance is illogical." *commence licking* LNGLNGLNGL

>>3915142
>Why did you join an assassin's guild anyway?

"B-because! Ms. Nevada saved my life! I owe-owe... owed her... a... a... UWAAAAAAAA" she starts to cry again.

Tell her about Aldwin.

>>3915196
Tap her on the back. Gently. Ask her how this happened.

>>3915196
Hug?

>>3915196
Tell her that you died before. And not even dying can stop a force of good!

>>3915196

Pat her on the back and try to calm her down.

(Why I am getting fuck awesome loli yuri scene here?)

>>3915202

Very awkwardly

>>3915196
Tell her not to cry, her friend will be back in no time! Or about as much time as it takes to kill a Hydra or something like that.

Ask her how Nevada got so fast.

>>3915216
Uh, wat? We can just go back and ask Cultist to do it. She'd be happy to.

>>3915226
I think we want this to be done correctly.

>>3915232
Well she'll be alive, right? That's as correctly as it can get!

>>3915244
Alive, but with the possibility of being a horrible mutated monster as well.

New thread: >>3915247

>>3915232
>>3915244

Cultist was the one who polymorphed Garrelf for us, she can probably do something for this, but then again, there is no questing involved with this approach