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  • File :1243879607.jpg-(20 KB, 320x240, 1243806157536.jpg)
    20 KB Anonymous 06/01/09(Mon)14:06 No.4734623  
    You Rage You Lose.
    http://www.chick.com/articles/dnd.asp
    http://www.chick.com/articles/frpg.asp
    >> Anonymous 06/01/09(Mon)14:09 No.4734634
    Kay, next campaign will feature a lot of dead clerics, paladins and priests.


    FFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFF
    >> Anonymous 06/01/09(Mon)14:10 No.4734641
    FFFFFFUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU
    >> Anonymous 06/01/09(Mon)14:11 No.4734653
         File :1243879903.jpg-(109 KB, 379x395, 1243129726483.jpg)
    109 KB
    SATAN SATAN SATAN SATAN
    >> Anonymous 06/01/09(Mon)14:14 No.4734666
         File :1243880041.jpg-(171 KB, 640x939, Nothic.jpg)
    171 KB
    FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCCCCCCCCCCCCCCKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKK
    >> Anonymous 06/01/09(Mon)14:14 No.4734670
    Good God...
    This is...
    Hilarious!
    >> Anonymous 06/01/09(Mon)14:14 No.4734672
    You know, you could pretty easily swap out the D&D pantheon for the monotheistic judeo-christian religion. Doesn't he know that even with all the rules laid out in the books that players are free to change things as much as they want?

    Also... Does Jack Chick actually believe in magic?
    >> Anonymous 06/01/09(Mon)14:15 No.4734675
    >>4734672
    >Also... Does Jack Chick actually believe in magic?

    Of course, he's christian. He believes in demons, magic and Satan.
    >> Anonymous 06/01/09(Mon)14:16 No.4734679
         File :1243880180.jpg-(51 KB, 892x565, LOOK WHAT YOU DID LOOK.jpg)
    51 KB
    >> Anonymous 06/01/09(Mon)14:17 No.4734685
    >>4734623
    LET HE WHO IS WITHOUT SIN CAST THE FIRST STONE.
    >> Anonymous 06/01/09(Mon)14:17 No.4734689
    >>4734672
    Yes, he does. In fact, he is obligated to believe in magic. If Satan is not actively empowering people to serve him, then Mr. Chick's religion and life's work are all for naught.

    Welcome to the wacky world of religion.
    >> Gwarfag !!K9jLbBpAauP 06/01/09(Mon)14:18 No.4734694
    "For example, you can have a "lawful evil" character. A handbook states that: "A lawful evil villain methodically takes what he wants within the limits of his code of conduct without regard to whom it hurts. He cares about tradition, loyalty and order, but not about freedom, dignity or life."7 Talk about a mish-mash of moral ambiguity. Our young people are having enough trouble getting their values straight without being immersed in this sort of material!"

    I just realized that the description for Lawful Evil fits 90% of christian beliefs. Is that why they fear this so much?
    >> Anonymous 06/01/09(Mon)14:18 No.4734698
    Just got to the section about alignments.
    His argument is that they're TOO CONFUSING.
    Pardon me while I finish laughing and change my underwear.
    >> Anonymous 06/01/09(Mon)14:19 No.4734707
    >>4734685
    /throw stone at Anonymous
    >You threw a stone at Anonymous! You are without sin!
    >> Anonymous 06/01/09(Mon)14:19 No.4734709
    I'm a Christian, and I am deeply offended by this thread.

    No, not because of Anonymous. You guys rock.

    But Jack Chick is a fucking retard.
    >> Anonymous 06/01/09(Mon)14:20 No.4734714
    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9Kgx2b1sIRs
    "I want to cast... MAGIC MISSILE!"
    >> Anonymous 06/01/09(Mon)14:21 No.4734725
    Haha, if Chick and the fundies have issues with D&D, wait until they see anything from White Wolf, or Shadowrun.
    >> Anonymous 06/01/09(Mon)14:21 No.4734726
    >>4734675
    But... Magic isn't like God or Satan. Magic is completely tangible and immediate.

    Surely he doesn't also believe that all those magic practicers out there have just been hiding their powers like crazy for thousands of years? I mean I could understand charms or curses that work by looking like coincidences, but does he really think there's some fucker out there that can cast magic missile?
    >> Anonymous 06/01/09(Mon)14:22 No.4734730
    Old
    >> Anonymous 06/01/09(Mon)14:22 No.4734733
    Shut up you guys, I'm trying to fight the Zombie over here!
    >> Anonymous 06/01/09(Mon)14:23 No.4734738
    Although, i'm catholic. I have no issues with DnD.
    >> Anonymous 06/01/09(Mon)14:23 No.4734739
    >>4734726
    Illusion, enchantment, curses, and divination.
    None have immediate, obvious effects.
    >> Anonymous 06/01/09(Mon)14:24 No.4734750
    >>4734738

    I guess you're double-stupid then.
    >> Anonymous 06/01/09(Mon)14:25 No.4734756
    Older than time.
    >> Anonymous 06/01/09(Mon)14:27 No.4734772
    Sweet, I like this guy, he claims the Cthulhu mythos is very real.
    >> Anonymous 06/01/09(Mon)14:28 No.4734777
    >>4734739

    Its pretty damn obvious someone is insane when they start seriously talking about casting an enchantment on something or someone.
    >> Anonymous 06/01/09(Mon)14:29 No.4734784
    Dungeons and Dragons...
    SATAN'S GAME
    >> Anonymous 06/01/09(Mon)14:29 No.4734785
    >>4734777
    But can you verify that something didn't happen?
    He can't delve too much into logic like that, or he loses the source of his power.
    >> Anonymous 06/01/09(Mon)14:30 No.4734792
    THERE YOU HAVE IT.
    SATANIC WORLD OF NIGHTMARE
    ITS THEY'RE GYM TEACHER'S FAULT.
    >> Anonymous 06/01/09(Mon)14:30 No.4734793
    >>4734733
    BRAAAKLEAAAAPHHHH!

    >>4734725
    I have considered writing to him about dark heresy.
    >> Anonymous 06/01/09(Mon)14:30 No.4734797
    You just KNOW the pope would excommunicate Jack Chick.
    >> I CLUB SEALS 06/01/09(Mon)14:31 No.4734803
    >>4734797

    pity he isn't catholic.
    >> Anonymous 06/01/09(Mon)14:32 No.4734816
    >>4734803
    The pope would get so pissed he'd excommunicate him anyway.

    Or just punch him in the face.
    >> Anonymous 06/01/09(Mon)14:33 No.4734821
    >>4734793

    Do it, faggot.
    >> Anonymous 06/01/09(Mon)14:33 No.4734824
    >>4734772
    Really, where is this? PLEASE TELL ME HE MADE PAMPHLET!

    I have the fake ones, but if Jack chick actually made handouts against cthulhu, I will have to print them out and put one under my friend's windshield wipers. EVERY DAY. He loves mythos.
    >> Anonymous 06/01/09(Mon)14:34 No.4734837
    >>4734725
    I would bet you any money that Jack Chick thinks that the real world is almost exactly like the OWoD setting.
    >> Anonymous 06/01/09(Mon)14:34 No.4734838
    Additionally, I would want to know: where young Mr. Pulling acquired his concept of "lycanthropic tendencies?" Where did he get his ideas about Hitler? Both are discussed in the D&D material.
    >> Anonymous 06/01/09(Mon)14:37 No.4734865
    >>4734821
    Hold on, lemme channel concerned parent. I'll get back to you with the results in a little while.

    I'm thinking of getting a P.O. box for this, so he won't know my real address. Jack Chick may be against magic, but that doesn't mean he doesn't know HOW to kill people with it. All he needs is your home address, some DNA, and your mother's maiden name.
    >> Anonymous 06/01/09(Mon)14:38 No.4734869
    >>4734837
    ...
    I suddenly want to make a pamphlet-based character in Hunter.
    Specifically, using them as wards and throwing weapons.
    Is this plausible?

    I will play him as horrendously over the top as needed.
    >> Anonymous 06/01/09(Mon)14:38 No.4734873
    >>4734694

    at least 70% of us could give a shit either way, for the record.

    Jack chick is a nutbag. I don't rage at him, I pity him.
    >> Anonymous 06/01/09(Mon)14:39 No.4734880
    >>4734709
    lol x-tians have worse lore than WoW
    >> Anonymous 06/01/09(Mon)14:41 No.4734895
    >>4734824
    http://www.chick.com/articles/frpg.asp
    Examining the Issues Section, last paragraph

    >>Contrary to the ramblings of D&D defenders like Michael Stackpole,29 the Necronomicon and the Cthulhu mythos are quite real. We will talk more about Mr. Stackpole later.

    Article wasn't written by Chick, though.
    >> Anonymous 06/01/09(Mon)14:41 No.4734904
    >>4734837
    White Wolf should make a setting based on Chick.

    Christian: The Cleansing.

    You kill catholics, vampires, jews, niggers, werewolves, mormons, jehova witnessess, policemen, abortion doctors, mages, satanists, cultists, hindus, muslims, gays, soldiers and pretty much everyone else you can come up with.
    >> Anonymous 06/01/09(Mon)14:42 No.4734914
    >>4734904

    isn't that basically what hunter : the reckoning is about?
    >> Anonymous 06/01/09(Mon)14:43 No.4734923
    >>4734873
    The problem is, he pities you too.
    >> Gwarfag !!K9jLbBpAauP 06/01/09(Mon)14:43 No.4734926
    >>4734873
    as you should. Not only does he make he religion look bad...he makes humanity look bad.
    >> Anonymous 06/01/09(Mon)14:44 No.4734932
    >>4734914
    I reckon.
    >> Anonymous 06/01/09(Mon)14:44 No.4734935
    >>4734914
    All Wayward. ALL THE TIME!
    >> Anonymous 06/01/09(Mon)14:46 No.4734952
    >>4734914
    I thought Hunter was about being an Iraq veteran who found out his neighbour is a vampire...
    >> Eponymous Rex !!taqDd9490Ip 06/01/09(Mon)14:46 No.4734958
    I used to work with a Chick follower.

    He was a nice guy, but the poor guy was... Well. Odd. Also he wanted me to read his "literature."

    We had quite a few philosophical and theological debates... But I couldn't fault the guy.

    His beliefs were what bothered me. Bathed ignorance and indoctrination. I wish I coulda broken him out of that insane cult...
    >> Anonymous 06/01/09(Mon)14:49 No.4734996
    >>4734932
    OH YOU! >:3
    >> thejamesw. 06/01/09(Mon)14:50 No.4735000
    >>4734895
    Micheal A. Stackpole? The guy who wrote all those epic StarWars books I read as a kid?

    Oh, these monkeyfuckers are going to get their shit kicked in for insulting the Stackpole!
    >> Anonymous 06/01/09(Mon)14:56 No.4735036
    Someone really needs to send him a copy of FATAL.

    Bonus points for sending him a link to Wraeththu.
    >> Anonymous 06/01/09(Mon)14:58 No.4735055
    >>4734623

    >These two guys sat in our living room and took copious notes from us on how to make sure the rituals were truly right "from the book," (this meaning that they actually came from magic grimoires or workbooks). They seemed satisfied with what they got and left us thankfully.

    its good to see that TSR did their research.
    >> Anonymous 06/01/09(Mon)15:00 No.4735064
    Like many (almost all?) media mavens, Mr. Freeman desperately defends his precious popular culture against the onslaught of "fundamentalist Christians" who have a "fortress mentality." Well, excuse us, sir, for believing in the Bible.
    >> Anonymous 06/01/09(Mon)15:05 No.4735105
    GORDON FREEMAN?
    >> Anonymous 06/01/09(Mon)15:06 No.4735113
    >>4734923

    No, he hates me and fears me. lol there's a difference.
    >> Anonymous 06/01/09(Mon)15:09 No.4735128
    >>4734873
    RAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGE
    >> Anonymous 06/01/09(Mon)15:09 No.4735130
         File :1243883368.jpg-(322 KB, 714x616, Cthulujackchick1.jpg)
    322 KB
    Old Chick tract is old.

    Pic somehow related.
    >> Anonymous 06/01/09(Mon)15:10 No.4735140
         File :1243883423.jpg-(273 KB, 711x526, Cthulujackchick2.jpg)
    273 KB
    Moar Cthulhu:
    >> Anonymous 06/01/09(Mon)15:14 No.4735182
    LEAVE THE DRAGONS ALONE!! AFTER ALL THEY HAVE DONE FOR YOU!!!
    >> Anonymous 06/01/09(Mon)15:16 No.4735211
    >>4735036
    FUCK YES, PENIS FLOWERS! I am going to include that in my concerned parent letter.

    So far the letter is fairly long. This is because I spend the first two pages telling how I found god, how JChick helped me find faith, saved, etc. I'll scan it, so you can get an idea of my handwriting (it's fairly messy, when writing the actual thing, I'tl be more girly/nice/ I'll write slower), I'll also include computext version of each page when I post.
    >> Anonymous 06/01/09(Mon)15:17 No.4735214
         File :1243883834.jpg-(202 KB, 883x1127, 1222401515915.jpg)
    202 KB
    Related
    >> Anonymous 06/01/09(Mon)15:19 No.4735235
    People who rally against fantasy as if it were real are their own living example of people who can't tell fantasy from reality. I read a book full of absolutely crazy shit and now I really believe it therefore someone else will actually believe anything they read too. You know what kind of bothers me? Technically they have, and simultaneously prove, their own theory.
    >> Anonymous 06/01/09(Mon)15:21 No.4735248
    BibleHeads are funny.
    >> Captain Tripfag !3rx6YO2/3k 06/01/09(Mon)15:27 No.4735312
    it is a mere game, a tool to entertain yourself with your friends. in fact, its advantage is that you get to know their true selves, like a anon too afraid to say hes a furry or that /b/-tard who wants to save the world and goes moralfag everywhere.

    an RPfag is indeed that. a moralfag is indeed what he roleplays. that sick rougue that keeps doin CE things for the sake of himself and fun is indeed that. i have long lost my gaming group, but from the first session, i knew who i really wanted to keep as a friend.

    having anti biblical stuff on it is the least expected, it is no fun then you do not have choice. i have played chaotic evil characters, DMed LE villains and played paladins, and i must say, in every time, we had fun with what my friends truly showed themselves as.
    >> Anonymous 06/01/09(Mon)15:31 No.4735339
         File :1243884674.jpg-(240 KB, 800x592, SPY.jpg)
    240 KB
    Fail hijack
    >> Anonymous 06/01/09(Mon)15:37 No.4735406
    >www.chick.com
    >chick
    >WOMAN
    Who cares what some raging hormone cunts think or say? As long as they are posting these things from the kitchen, all is well. It's not like they are capable of an educated opinion anyway.
    >> Anonymous 06/01/09(Mon)15:41 No.4735448
    >>4735406

    Dipshit, his name is Jack Chick.
    >> Anonymous 06/01/09(Mon)15:49 No.4735519
    >>4735448
    no one named "chick" and holding those kind of herp derp opinions can be considered male. I'm sorry. We just don't acept faggots as male.
    >> Anonymous 06/01/09(Mon)15:57 No.4735600
         File :1243886254.jpg-(573 KB, 1920x1080, Meet the pyro.jpg)
    573 KB
    Fail hijack
    >> Anonymous 06/01/09(Mon)15:59 No.4735631
    >>4735519

    Newfag summer is in high gear it seems.
    >> Anonymous 06/01/09(Mon)15:59 No.4735632
         File :1243886383.jpg-(11 KB, 180x162, f_Diabeetusm_a2b231f.jpg)
    11 KB
    "In the late 1970's, a couple of the game writers actually came to my wife and I as prominent "sorcerers" in the community. "

    BATSHIT CRAZY
    >> Anonymous 06/01/09(Mon)16:01 No.4735653
         File :1243886501.jpg-(12 KB, 400x300, strek.jpg)
    12 KB
    This was beautiful:

    "Witnesses saw him trying to summon up D&D demons just minutes before his death."

    "Like the people who think they can play around with ... pre-marital sex and not get burned by ... AIDS or pregnancy..."

    This has to be a troll site, it is just too absurd.
    >> Anonymous 06/01/09(Mon)16:04 No.4735682
         File :1243886667.jpg-(73 KB, 588x578, big bang - Copy.jpg)
    73 KB
    Oh and how did I just pass over this

    "They wanted to make certain the rituals were authentic. For the most part, they are."

    I remember back in 2nd ed a magic missle was 1d6 for every 3 levels.... I don't think you can get more authentic than that :/
    >> Anonymous 06/01/09(Mon)16:04 No.4735686
    it will also take you to hell faster than a greased demon on roller skates.
    >> Anonymous 06/01/09(Mon)16:07 No.4735720
    On May 17, a young girl named Julia was walking from her dormitory to the library. She had a number of difficult economics finals coming up, so she planned on pulling an all-nighter. She wandered aimlessly around the library, looking for a quiet place to study- there were a few people scattered around cramming, and Julia preferred complete solitude. She came upon the perfect place- a dusty old section of the library completely devoid of other people. After studying into the wee hours of the morning, Julia awoke to the sound of loud scratching and tearing. She glanced up, and saw a creature with a pale, elongated face, large teeth, and blood red eyes. It's head was split in an unnatural, seething way. Julia, nor that section of the library, were ever seen again.

    If you don't repost this, this same creature will hunt you the next time you are alone. Predators tend to prefer solitary prey.
    >> Anonymous 06/01/09(Mon)16:07 No.4735724
    >>4735653
    Hmmmm a D&D deamon... what would the stats on that be?
    >> Anonymous 06/01/09(Mon)16:07 No.4735731
         File :1243886878.jpg-(1.53 MB, 1700x2338, let1.jpg)
    1.53 MB
    >>4735211
    ok, postan letter. No bitching about my handwriting, I'l write it fancy-like for the final version.
    I got the name from a random gen.

    page 1 synopsis.
    I'm a big fan. I was bad in collage.
    >> Anonymous 06/01/09(Mon)16:08 No.4735738
    >>4734694
    Nail= Hit on Head
    >> Anonymous 06/01/09(Mon)16:09 No.4735751
    >>4734623
    i cant rage because im laughing too hard.
    >> Anonymous 06/01/09(Mon)16:11 No.4735770
         File :1243887080.jpg-(1.56 MB, 1700x2338, let2.jpg)
    1.56 MB
    page 2:
    blah blah met chjristian, read one of his tracts, 5 yrs later = married, 2 kids, oldest playin DARK HERESY?!?!
    >> Anonymous 06/01/09(Mon)16:13 No.4735800
    >>4735720
    >Julia, nor that section of the library, were ever seen again.

    Cause that sure explains how anyone else would know what fucking happened. GTFO.
    >> Lazy DM V !vONhvIg88o 06/01/09(Mon)16:14 No.4735804
    >>4735720
    But if you DO repost that, you will be eaten by TEN of the monsters. If you don't repost that, the original writer will be eaten instead.

    I fuckin' hate chain letters. Especially non-scary shit which tries to pass itself off as scary.
    >> Lazy DM V !vONhvIg88o 06/01/09(Mon)16:16 No.4735828
         File :1243887370.jpg-(18 KB, 300x233, aquaman superfriends.jpg)
    18 KB
    >>4735800
    Well it WAS seen by the goldfish...
    >> Anonymous 06/01/09(Mon)16:16 No.4735834
         File :1243887395.jpg-(1.54 MB, 1700x2338, let3.jpg)
    1.54 MB
    page 3:
    son, you cant play that game.
    Public library cthu... wreaththu? EW.
    >> Anonymous 06/01/09(Mon)16:20 No.4735894
    >>4735834

    I suggest you edit out the Chutulu Mythos part. Maybe somthing along the lines of

    "that awful Chtulthu thing I have heard about"
    >> Anonymous 06/01/09(Mon)16:21 No.4735914
         File :1243887719.jpg-(1.1 MB, 1700x2338, let4.jpg)
    1.1 MB
    >It's head was split in an unnatural, seething way.
    That doesn't even make sense.

    Page four, gotta add ending:

    I am concerened about my son, and the other youth of this nation. Because of that, I wrote this letter to you. You are the only one I know of who is actively crusading for the souls of God's children.

    Or some shit like that.

    Please: suggestions, revisions, ideas. This is by no means finished.
    >> Anonymous 06/01/09(Mon)16:23 No.4735931
    >>4735894
    excellent.
    >> Anonymous 06/01/09(Mon)16:29 No.4736000
    >>4735770
    Dark Heresy is a game of strong christian morals in which you fight in the name of space-jesus against the forces of not just one, but FOUR SATANS! Also ethnic cleansing.
    >> Anonymous 06/01/09(Mon)16:35 No.4736073
    >>4736000
    Right, but how do I make it sound bad? I need to make it seem like it is trying to attract christians, while still being bad, morally, and I'm too tired to do that well right now.
    >> Anonymous 06/01/09(Mon)16:44 No.4736200
    >>4736073
    Psykers. Seriously, fundies go apeshit over any mention of psychic ability.

    In this game, you also have the added "benefit"(insomuch as it's a benefit since it makes Jack Chick go crazy) of the fact that it can cause you to become a daemon-host. The main characters are expected to work with these psykers, usually, as though they were equals, despite the fact that they are a severe danger and a beacon to satan.
    >> Anonymous 06/01/09(Mon)16:45 No.4736207
    You know I really think that one of us should write an email to Chick that talks about how the cult of the God-Emperor of Humanity stands with him in his battle against the forces of corruption and sorcery.

    I'd do it myself but then I would give Jack Chick the ability to contact me in some form. And that's just terrible.
    >> Anonymous 06/01/09(Mon)16:47 No.4736248
    >>4736200
    satanS. There's 4 of them. And Malal. But no one pays her much attention any more.
    >> Anonymous 06/01/09(Mon)16:48 No.4736265
    >>4736207
    Fake Hotmail accounts!

    >>4736248
    >her
    what
    >> Anonymous 06/01/09(Mon)16:51 No.4736296
    >>4736265
    Sorry about that, it's already been a long day and it's only 4:50, so my brain isn't fully up to speed.
    >> Anonymous 06/01/09(Mon)16:52 No.4736310
    >>4736200
    Players gain psychic powers that eventually allow them to make "pacts" with demons, or become "daemon-hosts". The actual game, from what I can gather, is players going around and killing anyone who doesn't believe in thier "God-emporor of mankind".

    The game is extremely violent, and is very graphic with it's descriptions of death. (insert random crit effect here). The game obviosly is intended to subvert young minds, and promotr idolitry (sp?).
    >> Anonymous 06/01/09(Mon)16:54 No.4736339
    >>4736296
    No, no. The idea is... intriging. And I can't spell worth shit.
    >> Anonymous 06/01/09(Mon)16:59 No.4736398
    >>4736339
    That Malal is female? I could see it happening. After all, warp hath no fury like a woman scorned.
    >> Anonymous 06/01/09(Mon)17:03 No.4736438
    >The game is one of non-stop combat and violence. It is clear to me that this game is desensitizing players to violence and also causing an increased tendency to violent behavior.

    Sounds like a bad GM, or a group with a shitty diplomacy modifier.
    >> Anonymous 06/01/09(Mon)17:11 No.4736542
    Ok, writing up another version of the letter, this time on wordpad.
    Please keep the awesome suggestions coming.
    >> Anonymous 06/01/09(Mon)17:23 No.4736664
         File :1243891434.gif-(25 KB, 458x236, jack chick, you so crazy.gif)
    25 KB
    >> Anonymous 06/01/09(Mon)17:25 No.4736677
         File :1243891528.png-(76 KB, 467x240, upyoursjackchick.png)
    76 KB
    >> Anonymous 06/01/09(Mon)17:28 No.4736707
    >>4736664
    jack chick is indeed crazy
    >> Anonymous 06/01/09(Mon)17:31 No.4736728
    To me the funniest thing about the old Jack Chick DnD comic is that the group is mostly girls and the girls are not standard gamer hags.
    >> Anonymous 06/01/09(Mon)17:32 No.4736741
    >>4736542
    F.A.T.A.L.
    >> letterfagchicktroll 06/01/09(Mon)17:34 No.4736757
    >>4736741
    Later. I promise. Later.
    >> Anonymous 06/01/09(Mon)17:49 No.4736934
    I have never really summoned a demon..nor killed innocents...nor raped and stuff... am i doing something wrong? Maybe i should stop playing XGood characters?
    >> letterfagchicktroll 06/01/09(Mon)17:50 No.4736944
    Amanda Lule

    Address Shit

    Dear Mr. Chick,
    First, I want to say thank you. Ever since I became a christian, I've been a fan of your work for God. I've read your literature since I found Christ in collage, and have recently found your on-line articles just as helpful in living a christian life.

    -I'm just going to skip the boring part about finding faith.-

    We dated for five years before we got married. Now, I am so blessed. We have two children (8 and 14), who fill our lives with joy. But it can be difficult to raise two christians in the world we live in today.

    Our oldest son, William, was playing a game called "Dark Heresy" with his friends. I think it may be the new Dungeons and Dragons. He brought home the rules book, and I took one look at it, and decided that he was npt going to play this game. The cover itself is disturbing, but the contents are just as, if not more, twisted. Not only are there perverted, gruesome, disturbing images, there is also chillingly detailed violence.

    In the game, it is possible for players to decapitate, de-limb, set on fire, and do other unspeakable acts to other player's characters. It is also possible to gain psychic powers, summon demons (called "daemons" in the game), or even became a "daemon-host". My son assured me that it was all just fun and games, but I was horrified. Needless to say, we had a long talk, and he agrees that it wouldn't be christian to play, and that God doesn't these kinds of games.
    >> Anonymous 06/01/09(Mon)17:51 No.4736949
    >>4734666
    >666
    satan satan satan!
    >> letterfagchicktroll 06/01/09(Mon)17:52 No.4736960
    Not only does Dark Heresy reward demon worship, there is also an abundance of idolatry. The players are all working for the "God-Emporor of Mankind". On their quests, they are tempted by the "Chaos Gods". There is even a bit about how players must resist the corruption of evil. But no rewards occur when you resist evil, and the more corrupt characters are, the more options players have. This was undoubtedly an attempt by the game-makers to get christians to play the game. But the God-Emporor's servants are anything but Christian. Players can be assassins, robots, "psykers" (psykers use psychic powers to summon demons, or kill people with their powers), or even "clerics" of the God-Emporor.

    Players are also rewarded with "experience points" when they act "in character". These experience points are used to make their character more deadly in combat. What happens when players go to extreme lengths to get these "XP"? (Short for eXperience Points)

    I'm glad my son now understands that these kinds of game are unnactepable, and I let him know I was dissapointed he didn't realize it earlier. I am worried, though, about the threat this "game" poses to the children (and adults) who don't realize just how much danger this "game" puts them in.
    >> letterfagchicktroll 06/01/09(Mon)17:56 No.4736986
    >Not only does Dark Heresy reward demon worship, there is also an abundance of idolatry. The players are all working for the "God-Emporor of Mankind". On their quests, they are tempted by the "Chaos Gods". There is even a bit about how players must resist the corruption of evil. This was undoubtedly an attempt by the game-makers to get christians to play the game. But no rewards occur when you resist evil, and the more corrupt characters are, the more options players have. But the God-Emporor's servants are anything but Christian. Players can be assassins, robots, "psykers" (psykers use psychic powers to summon demons, or kill people with their powers), or even "clerics" of the God-Emporor.

    fixed.
    >> Anonymous 06/01/09(Mon)17:56 No.4736989
    God damn it somebody show them a picture of the fucking Emperor! It's space Jesus and everybody goddamn knows it, do it, DO IT!
    >> Anonymous 06/01/09(Mon)17:56 No.4736990
         File :1243893385.png-(34 KB, 690x656, 1240970973390.png)
    34 KB
    FFFFFFFFFFFFFFFUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU
    >> Anonymous 06/01/09(Mon)17:57 No.4736996
    Wait...Monks know shit about occult stuff?
    >> letterfagchicktroll 06/01/09(Mon)17:57 No.4737000
    >>4736989
    I'll suggest in the letter that jc take a look at the rulesbook for himself.
    >> Anonymous 06/01/09(Mon)17:58 No.4737012
    >>4736996
    If they have Forbidden Lore (Cults) they do.
    >> Anonymous 06/01/09(Mon)18:01 No.4737033
    >>4737012
    Even clerics can have that cant they...
    >> Anonymous 06/01/09(Mon)18:03 No.4737055
    >>4736989
    Actually, the Emperor is more like the Antichrist to a T... guy who unites the world, bans other religions, killed billions just because they didn't want to kneel before him... no wait, that does sound like Revelations Christ too. nevermind.

    Actually, there's literally no real way you can tell the Christ and Antichrist apart, the Bible even says that the Antichrist will be just like the real Christ. The only litmus test is the one who wins. That, to me, sounds suspiciously convenient.
    >> Anonymous 06/01/09(Mon)18:05 No.4737067
    From the URL, I'd assumed it would be feminist criticisms of D&D. I was prepared to be bemused but conflicted, since D&D is clearly harmless but feminists take issues with the smallest, most insignificant things.

    Then it was a christian, and I was relieved. I fucking EXPECT them to be crazy.
    >> Anonymous 06/01/09(Mon)18:10 No.4737124
    Hes a fucking ex-satanist, he actually actively practiced bad shit on purpose, what the fuck!
    >> Anonymous 06/01/09(Mon)18:11 No.4737138
    So...am i very bad at roleplaying, or dont we usually skip details in HOW we cast the spells?
    >> Anonymous 06/01/09(Mon)18:13 No.4737152
    Mister 'Chick' is rather silly. I think he would best be left alone as he is obviously far beyond the reach of reason.


    Also, his name is 'Chick', that pretty damn funny if you ask me.
    >> Anonymous 06/01/09(Mon)18:13 No.4737156
    >wait until they see anything from White Wolf

    Thing is, White Wolf just isn't very good at being offensive. They just try too hard, they're the /b/ of RPGs.
    >> Anonymous 06/01/09(Mon)18:14 No.4737167
    The gods are many, we got the father, the son and the holy ghost.
    >> letterfagchicktroll 06/01/09(Mon)18:16 No.4737180
    >>4737152
    Right, but I'm trying to get a pamphlet, or at least on online article, on DH.
    >> Anonymous 06/01/09(Mon)18:17 No.4737195
    >It needs to be emphasized that a spiritual deception which draws people away from Jesus Christ is much more dangerous than automotive chicken or people dying of starvation.

    sigh...
    >> Anonymous 06/01/09(Mon)18:22 No.4737260
    >>4736944
    "and that God doesn't these kinds of games."

    My god they accidently a whole word..
    >> Anonymous 06/01/09(Mon)18:23 No.4737269
    I too was very offended by the first D&D movie.

    because it sucked
    >> letterfagchicktroll 06/01/09(Mon)18:24 No.4737280
    >>4737260
    Two words, actually.

    approve of
    >> Anonymous 06/01/09(Mon)18:26 No.4737301
    >>4736944
    EMPRAH
    >> letterfagchicktroll 06/01/09(Mon)18:56 No.4737613
    eating, will be back to see if there are any more suggestions.

    will make another thread tomorrow with final(?) version of letter.
    >> Anonymous 06/01/09(Mon)19:28 No.4737891
    Oooh! Here's one, tell him that the Emprah is supposed to represent Christ as a tyrannical non-loving entity! He'll love that.
    >> Anonymous 06/01/09(Mon)19:29 No.4737897
    lol
    op here

    What have I done?
    >> Anonymous 06/01/09(Mon)19:43 No.4738025
    >>There is hardly a game in which the players do not indulge in murder, arson, torture, rape or highway robbery."

    Can't..stop...LAUGHING
    >> Anonymous 06/01/09(Mon)19:49 No.4738083
    Hahahahaha! Awesome.
    >> Anonymous 06/01/09(Mon)19:52 No.4738106
    >>4737055
    There can be only one!
    >> Anonymous 06/01/09(Mon)19:55 No.4738135
    >Additionally, much of the game contains overtones that reek of illicit sex and sexual violence. For example, the cover of one D&D supplement, called Eldrich Wizardry, shows a naked woman reclining on an obviously satanic ritual altar. This tragic scene is compelling because it is really what is done in genuine satanic groups all over the nation.2 It is extremely sado-masochistic because the fate of such a woman is to be either raped, gang-raped, tortured or sacrificed to a demon god. This kind of imagery can be very provocative and seductive to adolescent males or even adults.

    Fuck yes.
    >> / !/////m/ShI 06/01/09(Mon)19:59 No.4738178
         File :1243900796.jpg-(365 KB, 1051x688, fuckingfatal.jpg)
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    >>4738135
    Have I got a game for you.
    >> Anonymous 06/01/09(Mon)20:01 No.4738195
    >>4738178
    It's all clear now!
    Jack Chick just mistook FATAL for D&D.
    >> Anonymous 06/01/09(Mon)20:06 No.4738241
    >In other words, religions are myths. Christianity is a myth; Judaism is a myth, etc

    You made that connection, then ignored it. Good job, bro.
    >> Anonymous 06/01/09(Mon)20:11 No.4738301
    >>4738178
    That game does not look demonic enough for me. As a true, hard-core player of Dungeons and Dragons, the game's cover must feature wizards and druids casting spells of a demonic nature upon her nubile flesh. Additionally, demons must be reveling in the background, and sex slaves must languish in the foreground. Furthermore, a lewd depiction of Christ must be somewhere in the image.
    >> / !/////m/ShI 06/01/09(Mon)20:14 No.4738328
         File :1243901683.jpg-(291 KB, 741x953, fatalcover.jpg)
    291 KB
    >>4738301
    Have you seen the ACTUAL cover?
    >> Anonymous 06/01/09(Mon)20:15 No.4738331
    >>4738135 demon god
    Wait, did some Christfag just validate the existence of a deity that is not the one true god?
    >> Anonymous 06/01/09(Mon)20:19 No.4738369
    >>4738331
    Not really. To a christfag any god that's not "God" is a false god, thus would not bother clarifying that it's a false god. Because if you don't see it as a false god then you're a filthy heathen that needs to be burned at the stake.
    >> Anonymous 06/01/09(Mon)20:25 No.4738432
         File :1243902316.gif-(17 KB, 435x225, enCatholiclolz.gif)
    17 KB
    Oh man, the lulz just don't stop.

    You know what makes it official? YOU HAVE TO DATE IT.
    >> Anonymous 06/01/09(Mon)20:27 No.4738457
    >>4738369

    False God implies that it is not actually a god. Not just a god they don't like.
    >> Anonymous 06/01/09(Mon)20:30 No.4738488
    I love the MWV
    >> Anonymous 06/01/09(Mon)20:32 No.4738498
    >It should be a serious business with us to be thoroughly purged of every error which may have a tendency to foster the spirit of Popery

    >It should be a serious business with us to be thoroughly purged

    >serious business
    >> Anonymous 06/01/09(Mon)20:41 No.4738580
    >Today shelves in major bookstores literally groan under the weight of various of books on Wicca
    >When D&D started, you could perhaps find four or five books on Wicca in print.
    He should also check the correlates for pirates and global warming. Turn off the air conditioning and the pirates will return!
    >> Anonymous 06/01/09(Mon)20:42 No.4738593
    >>4738580
    OH GOD HE'S RIGHT! DX
    >> Anonymous 06/01/09(Mon)21:06 No.4738781
    >>4738580
    I thought it was that lack of pirates caused global warming...
    >> Anonymous 06/01/09(Mon)21:07 No.4738789
    >>4737180
    I think to do that you should write in not decrying, but supporting it, saying 'I know of all your fine work against roleplaying but this, THIS is a shining example of christian values for reasons X Y Z.'
    >> Anonymous 06/01/09(Mon)21:07 No.4738793
    I bet that Jack Chick would believe in Gehenna AND the Apocalypse.

    Holy shit, someone should make a tract about a Tau sympathizer being converted to the proper worship of the God-Emperor and learning to shun the impure Xenos
    >> Anonymous 06/01/09(Mon)21:11 No.4738821
    >>4738781
    with correlations, you just can't say!
    >> Anonymous 06/01/09(Mon)21:11 No.4738826
    >>4738793
    seconded
    >> ­Anonymous 06/01/09(Mon)21:14 No.4738846
         File :1243905263.gif-(32 KB, 369x369, Gasp.gif)
    32 KB
    >>a spectacular movie called Dungeons and Dragons
    >> Anonymous 06/01/09(Mon)21:16 No.4738860
    >>4738793
    >>4738826
    And thus begins the inevitable creation of Administrator Chicktus. Fighting heresy door-to-door, armed with stacks of tiny pamphlets.
    >> Toy Store Anonymous !wImXn9Y2hw 06/01/09(Mon)21:18 No.4738878
    >>4738793
    You know, I always wondered how Chick would react to Warhammer's fluff, particularly imperium.

    I figure you do enough name changing, and he might be all for it.
    >> Anonymous 06/01/09(Mon)21:18 No.4738880
    >They are often people who "march to the beat of a different drummer."
    oh you are not going for Mill now are you?
    >> Anonymous 06/01/09(Mon)21:19 No.4738885
    >>4738880
    thoreau, you mean
    >> Anonymous 06/01/09(Mon)21:21 No.4738901
    >as something evil and ultimately useless against the power of the true and living God
    but Gandalf is way stronger than Saruman
    >> Anonymous 06/01/09(Mon)21:21 No.4738908
    >One is more tempted to ask, what evidence ISN'T there?
    I love this guy
    >> Anonymous 06/01/09(Mon)21:56 No.4739198
    I miss the old satanic D and D. This new weeaboo shit is depressing.
    >> Anonymous 06/01/09(Mon)22:04 No.4739266
    http://www.chick.com/reading/tracts/0046/0046_01.asp
    Oh god....
    This is hilarious.
    >> Anonymous 06/01/09(Mon)22:12 No.4739340
    >>4739266
    BLACKLEAF NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!
    >> Anonymous 06/01/09(Mon)22:28 No.4739462
    >>4738860
    Awesome! Maybe a Sister of Battle helping out with a book burning somewhere.
    >> Anonymous 06/01/09(Mon)22:35 No.4739507
    >>4739462
    Or we could burn some Beatles records.
    Thats fun too.
    >> Anonymous 06/01/09(Mon)22:46 No.4739580
    >>4739507
    THere aren't any Beatles records in WH40K, silly anon!
    >> Anonymous 06/01/09(Mon)22:53 No.4739631
    >>4739266
    >>4739340

    Anyone notice they talk a whole lot about bondage in these comics, and it's all starring a bunch of evil women? I'm starting to think Jack has a bit of a dungeon fantasy himself.
    >> Anonymous 06/01/09(Mon)23:18 No.4739788
    >>4739631
    Lol. Lets burn some Beatles records.
    >> Anonymous 06/01/09(Mon)23:36 No.4739907
    >>4739788
    GOD DAMNIT THERE ARE NO SURVIVING BEATLES RECORDS IN WH40K. WHY CAN'T YOU UNDERSTAND THAT?!?!?!?!
    >> Anonymous 06/01/09(Mon)23:40 No.4739948
    This is my new fave quote

    >Of course, just like everything else, some people (young or otherwise) will say, "Those people were just weird or losers to begin with. I'm too together to fall into stuff like that. It's just a game!" Yeah, and an H-bomb is just a firecracker! Like the people who think they can play around with crack or pre-marital sex and not get burned by death, AIDS or pregnancy, the person who thinks they can mess with D&D without getting burnt is whistling in the dark
    >> Anonymous 06/01/09(Mon)23:52 No.4740054
    Trolls of 4chan, learn from the master:

    >Defenders of D&D often complain that it is only a game. Playing chicken with cars is "only a game" until someone gets killed. So is Russian roulette! I am frequently told to "get a life" or write about something more important than D&D, like social justice or world hunger. The devil would sure like that.
    >> Anonymous 06/01/09(Mon)23:56 No.4740092
    >>4740054
    The devil sure would. He's laughing at your articles right now, god forbid you try to write about world peace.
    >> Anonymous 06/02/09(Tue)00:08 No.4740228
    >>4740092

    It actually gets better.

    His stance is that D&D is more dangerous than crashing cars or russian roulette because D&D poisons your SOUL because you play it with your MIND.

    So crusading against D&D is more important than helping starving children in africa because the starving children go to heaven when they die (if they loved JEEESUS) but anyone that plays D&D goes to hell.
    >> Anonymous 06/02/09(Tue)00:09 No.4740234
    Another christfag here. For those of you berating Christians because of Chick, remember that he is an insane little man.

    Also, no Fort save to resist the poison? Good god woman, are some sort of extermist Gygaxian DM? At least the old Sphere of Annihilation trap had some reasoning to it!
    >> Anonymous 06/02/09(Tue)00:11 No.4740257
    >>4740234

    >Fort save

    That would be a PPDM save, thank you very much.
    >> Anonymous 06/02/09(Tue)00:12 No.4740264
         File :1243915963.jpg-(22 KB, 564x300, Zombie, the.jpg)
    22 KB
    Can't check it out, OP, I'm fighting The Zombie.
    >> Anonymous 06/02/09(Tue)00:13 No.4740275
    >>4740228
    I don't think I approve of his reasoning. Fuck this asshole.
    >> Anonymous 06/02/09(Tue)00:16 No.4740300
    >>4740264
    Ms. Frost is fucking hot. I bet she's kinky and promiscuous.

    >>4740228
    We gotta keep the good children of the world pure.

    Those children aren't in Africa.
    >> Anonymous 06/02/09(Tue)00:19 No.4740324
         File :1243916390.jpg-(331 KB, 1024x768, TherionPass.jpg)
    331 KB
    >>4740264
    Great innuendo or self-pleasuring or GREATEST innuendo for self-pleasuring?
    >> Anonymous 06/02/09(Tue)00:20 No.4740330
    Quite Interesting...
    >> Anonymous 06/02/09(Tue)03:23 No.4741621
    >>4740324
    they did call orgasms the little death...
    >> Anonymous 06/02/09(Tue)06:09 No.4742556
    >>4741621

    No, that was fear, and it supposedly brings total oblivion.

    ...

    Sorry, couldn't help it.
    >> Anonymous 06/02/09(Tue)07:25 No.4742964
    >>4739907
    the 30271th re-release of the White Album in the new psychosonic format.
    >> Anonymous 06/02/09(Tue)10:40 No.4744000
    >>4742964
    I was thinking Sgt. Pepper, but thats fine too.
    >> Anonymous 06/02/09(Tue)10:47 No.4744029
    its so damn funny when I read this stuff cuz one of my best frined who go's to a VARY devout christian and is going to school to be a christian youth teacher plays DnD with me all the time.
    >> Anonymous 06/02/09(Tue)12:52 No.4744720
    >>4739266
    Debbie makes me lol so hard
    >> Anonymous 06/02/09(Tue)13:00 No.4744786
    >>4738860
    >Chicktus
    Really a cultist of Tzeentch.
    >> Anonymous 06/02/09(Tue)13:23 No.4744988
    >"As a Christian, would it be appropriate for you to participate in a role-playing game with friends where each of you imagines a scenario involving a variety of sexual activities including fornication, adultery and homosexuality?"

    >"Anyone who knows anything about the Bible, recoils in horror at such a suggestion. Why? Because we immediately recognize that this "game" would quickly enflame the powerful sex drives of the players, planting suggestions in their spirits that God condemns."

    ITT Chick admits that he'll be overwhelmed by the desire to suck cock if he ever thinks about homosexuality.
    >> Anonymous 06/02/09(Tue)14:03 No.4745276
         File :1243965820.jpg-(3 KB, 107x139, testament.jpg)
    3 KB
    Somebody send a copy of Testament to Chick and his posse of gods rejects; they shouldn't miss the fun of biblical inspired RPG
    http://rs30.rapidshare.com/files/73562165/testament_-_roleplaying_in_the_biblical_era.pdf
    >> Anonymous 06/02/09(Tue)14:07 No.4745294
         File :1243966043.gif-(123 KB, 419x348, samson.gif)
    123 KB
    >>4745276
    The old testament is pretty grimdark old sand and sandals. I'd play it, as long as it was very accurate to the setting. I want a quest from the king to collect 100 Philistine Foreskins, for example.
    >> Anonymous 06/02/09(Tue)14:43 No.4745540
    "Any serious sorcerer will tell you that magic can be as baroque or as simple as the magician him- or herself wishes."

    I r srs magik man. I cast Color Spray. Then I cast level 9 Cattle Rustling, Murder, Rape, Arson, and Rape monster. Jack Chick is dead. Huzzah! *Soul Loss*
    >> Anonymous 06/02/09(Tue)15:20 No.4745762
    # D&D player (14 years old) Sean Sellers was convicted of killing his parents and a convenience store clerk in Greeley, Oklahoma (1/11/87). He is the youngest inmate of death row in the country as of this writing (22 now). His involvement in hard-core Satanism began with D&D, according to his own testimony. Praise the Lord, he is now a Born Again Christian!7

    ...

    ...


    ...


    BAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
    >> Anonymous 06/02/09(Tue)16:39 No.4746426
    >>4744988
    Penis.
    >> Anonymous 06/02/09(Tue)16:50 No.4746532
    >>4746426
    That too.
    >> Anonymous 06/02/09(Tue)17:04 No.4746684
    Yay for religious nutjobs!
    >> Anonymous 06/02/09(Tue)18:16 No.4747359
    >>4745762
    I lol'd.
    >> Anonymous 06/02/09(Tue)18:31 No.4747511
    >>4746684
    8rrwazeec5i6thn78060ykugjfgussmartymcflykjfajfjafjafjoiajsdfoijfpenisanfasfidsfojdocbrownakapsjf
    >> Anonymous 06/02/09(Tue)18:40 No.4747630
    >>4747511
    Marty Mcfly? Lawl.



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