Party tank kills a guy with a punch to the balls. Later, finds a book bound in human skin.

In one cyberpunk game, a guy used a pipe and his motorcycle to joust a mech that was kidnapping his girlfriend.

One time my Star Wars RPG party and I crushed Vader with a service elevator. My character then stole the Emperor's chair, because he thought it would look good in his bedroom on the ship.

My character was an Ewok Sith, by the way. Thought I'd throw that out there.

Leaping onto an enemy's flying carpet and proceeding to cut it into shreds, on the assumption that you will survive the fall, while the enemy will not.

>>6570025
>Ewok Sith

>>6570062

Yep. He wore a blanket as a cape, and wielded a lightstaff (or whatever the fuck you call it) and used it to pole vault over people...

Very fun character to roleplay, needless to say.

I once leapt from a chain suspended over a chasm filled with whirling blades of death through a door of solid oak, haloed by the pink mist that had once been a friend and colleague as he fell to his death behind me.

I rolled, much like the description from OP, and landed right between the chair occupied by the third party member and the empty chair left for me.

I dusted myself off, nodded, and sat in the chair as if nothing had happened.

Oddly enough, the guy behind the desk who was testing our abilities with this trap didn't seem impressed.

Another one from way back (That really only worked because the DM was WAY too lenient, but hey, whatcha gonna do?):

The party and I, we're defending our castle in the Underdark (See that leniency I was talking about yet?),
and the bastards that are attacking bring in a fucking PYROCLASTIC DRAGON. We were all, at this point, level 16 and above. So, we know this'll be challenging, but we can probably still win.

About five or six turns in, the big fucker's right next to our castle, and he's breathing fire. Vorn, our resident Drizzt-character (who was also a vampire, again with the leniency), he's looking down at the dragon from the roof of the castle. That's when he remembers: he has an item familiar, his scimitar! So, he points the sword downward just as the dragon's roaring at him, and he uses Create Water into his mouth. The water made the big bastard's throat seal shut so he couldn't use that damn lava breath, and we all jump out of hiding and take him out.

A little stupid, but a cool story nonetheless.

OP was gonna start a thread much like this. Guess I will post here instead. This happened just a few hours ago, one of the best sessions I've had to date.

First, to understand a few things, here is the very generalized setting and background:

It's several hundred years past 2100, exactly when is not known. The world has seen staggering heights of technology in all forms, yet has been cast down by a devastating global cataclysm that threw the world back to the dark ages. Human civilizations hid underground in huge cities, the Enclaves, and they waged terrible war on each other using all weapons imaginable and unimaginable. Whether as a consequence of this or not, the climate of the earth was severely disturbed. Rains of acid, meteor showers, entire oceans aflame and terrible, terrible storms and hurricanes able to rip entire mountains apart ravages the earth.

Then for a time, the earth is silent, still. The Enclaves lies silent, except for the droning sound of robots and droids toiling tirelessly. The terrible weather that ravages the earth calms down. The climate is not yet back to what it was, but in comparison to the terrible crescendo that was, it might as well be silent. Slowly, creatures start to roam the earth again. Yet these are nothing like what you have ever seen. From the depths of the few forests, caves and other remote locations that were not entirely destroyed by the cataclysm crawls a new fauna, like you have never seen before. The giant Oak Oxes, reminiscent of Stag Beetles, just four times the size of the largest of horses and more fierce than any grizzly. Packs of savage Etter Dogs, long sleek reptiles that run faster than any of the great cats and pounce harder than any canine. And many other even more bizarre and lethal creatures.

>>6570815
Not long after animals that you and I are more closely familiar with step up from hidden underground complexes and ancient overgrown labs. Cats, dogs, bears, foxes, elks, moose, deer, wolf and virtually any mammal from todays world. With one slight difference, they are mutated to stand upright, have opposable thumbs, and are just as cognizant and capable of speech as you and I! Among them walk other mutants, though not with any animal characteristics. They are obviously from a more human heritage, but have been blessed, or cursed, with extraneous mutations like more eyes, extra arms, incredible speed, spiked backs, dual brains, long claws, swift regeneration and the like. These individuals quickly form large tribal and barbarous societies that roam the earth just like we did many thousand years ago.

We skip ahead a bit, and eventually, a few new figures come to the surface of this new, changed, post-cataclysmic world, this time out of the Enclaves. One of these are the true humans, those that are not mutated at all, but who has staid clean, or absent, of any and all mutations. They generally stand somewhat taller than other, mutated humans or mutated animals, and are generally an equal somewhat stronger, faster, smarter, healthier and more beautiful. Most of them relatively quickly order themselves as the leaders and the elite of the roaming tribes they encounter. However, even though they originate from the great Enclaves, the past pinnacle of human technology, science and ingenuity, they bring very nearly none of that with them. They stand befuddled from waking from a far too long cryosleep, and remember but naught of who they were or of the society they lived in.

>>6570834
Next are the robots and the droids, who too eventually wander out from the Enclaves that have so long confined them. But neither do these remember much of anything from these ancient civilizations, their memories have corroded from centuries of decline, as they were never meant to hold information for so long. Being programmed with ancient commands that no longer make sense, the robots rise to the surface to try and find a new meaning to their drudging existence, those who are even cognizant of that much. They find fledgling societies that are often run by humans, and recognize some spark in these individuals that they do not see in the lesser mutated humans or mutated animals, and learn that they have basic, nearly unbreakable commands written in to them that make them subservient to these individuals, and obligated to protect them, rules that not even time can erase. Most find themselves content in this new meaning of existence, others find themselves with no choice, and so acts as tools to further secure humanity as the ruling caste. Only a few selects robots are truly free, with these commands either being somehow forcefully removed from them, or for some reason never being put into them in the first place. These troubled individuals only find they have an even harder time adapting to this new world order, and often do not see themselves as truly a part of it. They often roam the earth, looking for some mystic answer, or something, that can ironically free them from their freedom.

>>6570850
The third and last to rise from the ancient tombs that are the Enclaves are the psionic mutants, who take the form of either animal or human, but otherwise possess no revealing external mutations. No, the powers these individuals possess is far better hidden, far more subtle, and far, far more dangerous. They find they can do amazing and terrible feats with their very minds. They can make objects float in the air, they can set things and beings on fire, they can heal the most grievous wounds with but a touch, or take a life just as easily. They can probe anothers mind and know their thoughts, or even control their actions entirely. There seems to be no end to the scope of these powers, yet luckily each psionic mutant seem only to possess a few of them. More than any other, psionic mutants have a hard time finding a place in this new world. Their powers make others jealous, or terrified, and so they seek out those psionics them can find and drive them away if they are kind, outright slaughter them if they are not. Thus these psionics live a life of fear, a life of never being safe and secure, always being on their guard, and never being able to be truly themselves.

>>6570864
Not let's skip ahead a few more hundred years. Societies rise and fall, but little by little, they progress in technology and science, as well as other areas, much with the help of ancient technology they find and try to understand, until they come to a point in time where they, in the best of cases, is at an 19th century form of enlightenment. Sadly, this progress is not uniform, and in other areas they might as well be back in the dark ages. Society has been strictly set by now, though. The top, the rulers and the elite are almost uniformly humans. These are always treated to the best, and rule over lesser fortunate humans and mutants of all kinds. Some rule more justly, others more tyrannically, all in their own little city state. Some of these join together to form great alliances. Yet some subjugate the surrounding lands to form great empires. Finally others use diplomacy and cunning to stay both neutral and ahead, by playing other states against each other.
Yet at the bottom of society you will uniformly, in any of these states, find the mutants. The toilers and the laborers. At best, respected as a lesser caste that are worth as much as they work, other times simply beaten for the fun of it. To understand it better, you could compare them to how black people once had it in America and many other parts of the globe where they had been traded as slaves and were, at best, second-class citizens.

>>6570888
The psionic mutants is not at all considered a caste in society, in that they are never respected. Sure, there might be the odd individual that simply does not care or who is actually open-minded enough to judge any individual by their own merit. Yet these are few and far between enough so that they might as well be disregarded. Psionic mutants one and all have to pretend they are something other than they are, be it a simple lowly mutant, or for some lucky, a true human, except for a few scattered and remote societies, deep in the wild forests that consist of only psionic mutants. Yet these societies are feared more than almost anything, and eradicated as soon as they are found. This hunt of psionic mutants and how they live their lives can be compared to the Spanish inquisition's hunt of witches.

Finally, robots generally stand outside society as well, but enjoy more privileges than most humans, as they are basically the toys of nobles, in so far as they are capable of enjoying this. Only a select few city states actually consider robots equal to other citizens.

This is the world of Mutant: the Scions of the Cataclysm.

Motherfucker this really got a lot more winded than what I had initially set out to do. But fuck it, the keystrokes just flowed and now it's written. Might as well post it.

Now to write down the awesome thing that actually HAPPENED today. Motherfucking fuck...

In a pirate game, we had been captured by the worst slaver in the game setting. It was a fucking nightmare, they raped my maid, that sort of thing.

Finally, we succeeded it bursting out of our rooms. It was far for over, of course. After fighting for freedom in the bowels of a ship filled with hostiles, we made it to the outside.

Our main vessel wasn't here, but the fuckers had my little sloop, The Swallow, in tow. ironic, since the party always made fun of my character (an avalonian noble who was very... avalonian. She needed her baths, she wrote poetry, she painted) and especially they made fun of my "little", "useless", painted-in-blue sloop.

We ran for it, they started climbing along the rope that kept it close, but I wouldn't follow : the slavers had my HORSE.

So I went back into the ship, swashbuckling my way in, and then the party saw me emerge from the wall, wood splinters flying everywhere, as my horse flew free.

I when on the opposite side of the ship, dodging bullets and swords and axes and barrels. Why ? Simple. I needed all the momentum I could manage.

I rode as fast as I could, with the Swallow already parting from the slave ship. There was a huge gap now. it was my only chance anyway, if they took me back they would make ME endure what my poor servant had.

I galloped, I jumped, I flew, bullets singing past my ears, shouts of disbelief under my horse's hooves. And then I landed on the Swallow with a defying roar, and my mates cheering around.

I shall never, EVER forget the picture in my mind, of Alienor on her horse, jumping a several meters gap, her white frame against the blue sky.

I did crazier shit in ten years of gaming. But I don't know, this particular one makes me jump on my chair everytime I speak of it.

>>6571054
That's awesome, but be advised that someone is going to write or request a description of said maid rape the moment they read that.

>>6571092

My poor Meryl, later she was kidnapped by an avalonian corsair and I never saw her again. The GM says she's still alive, he wouldn't lie about that, but I'm afraid of what'll happen when we meet again.

>>6570815
>>6570834
>>6570850
>>6570864
>>6570888
>>6570901

Also, Masterfag, I hate you for being swedish and able to understand MUTANT. I've been craving for this game since forever. Any chance you'll have the time to translate it ?

>>6570901
Anyway, our party:
(Me) M: A psionic skilled in pistol-toting, some larcenous skills and more speed-than-brawn kinda. Has the psionic abilities to: 1. Mentally connect with another object or person that I have previously seen/met and experience everything as they do with all senses, or as it would do if it had senses.
2. Touch another person and leech one of their skills, meaning he loose some and I gain just as much, temporarily.
3. Telekinesis. Not very powerful or precise, but a handy ace-up-the-sleeve trick.

(Friend1) P: An ex-soldier/mercenary type guy who generally totes a huge, old rifle and not good for much but battles or being another pair of eyes or arms. Is also a psionic, but can only either set people on fire or start a exothermic process in another beings gut (basically setting them on fire on the inside).

>>6571187
(Friend2) Le: Also a psionic, actually. Is generally the face of the group and is more or less skilled in all social skills, but can tote a pistol well enough. Has the psionic abilities 1. To connect to a persons emotions, knowing them intimately and plainly, as well as instantly knowing if that person is lying. 2. To be supernaturally able to change the state of mind of one or a crowd of people. No huge changes are allowed, like make someone who hates you love you, but you can *always* move someone to a neutral state of mind where you can at least talk sensibly about any subject. Can also inspire an irritated crowd to be very angry, or change a slight affection into honest love.
3. Inspire great fear in one or a few minds, to the point where they run in panics, try to hide as well as possibly if they cannot run, or lies whimpering in a corner if they can do neither.

(Friend3) La: Not a psionic, but an ancient mining heavy duty robot. Has a few neat options, like a light ramp that can light up any darkness for a very large radius, or blind people in combat. A pair of launchers that shoot steel wires with some sort of multi-purpose grappling thing that can attach to anything. Can use these to catch fleeing guys, act as a makeshift elevator, grapple enemies or just carry around a big-ass chest on his back and still have his arms free.
He is also heavier than other robots of his size and has extra motors in his arms that double his strength in explosive situations (like punching something, but not continuously carrying something). He's a total beast in close quarters combat and fucks everyone up. He is however a simple mining robot and has almost no mind of his own. He obeys Le almost manically, and considers him his master. He also obeys either me or P more than any other human. Either he is not aware that we are psionics and not humans, does not care, or not smart enough to make the distinction.

Fuck, another long-winded post...

>>6571147
Actually I've been thinking of doing just that for some time now. All the world deserves to know and love MUTANT for the awesome that it is. I just need some kind of motivation. Maybe I could be a greedfag and set up a paypal or something, but I doubt many would pay. And it's not really about money though, even if it would help set aside some time for it. I'm juggling a lot with university, having some semblance of a social life, trying to get this fucking sweet girl I know to be interested in me, making a homebrew, planning a feature campaign unrelated to the homebrew and actually playing my normal games. And, you know, slacking off now and then.

But fuck, I'm getting more psyched just by you mentioning it.

>>6571229

'SWE??' Dude here too, if you or your friends have some webskills you could like set up a forum and make the translation a collaborative effort. Gods know i'd join.

>>6571229
>>6571259

Anon is right. Do it a collaborative effort. One of my friend's girlfriend is swedish (easy to have those in France) and as I reckon from what she told us, you people usually all know english.

I just saw pictures of MUTANT and I wanted to play it, so, an english translation ? good grief.

And now, onto what ACTUALLY HAPPENED (yes, I suck, too much TL;DR).

Anyway, we had recently arrived at this trading station in the middle of a swamp to track down some scientist-ish guy who could supposedly extract some vital information from the memory core of a robot head that we towed with us, that we were being hunted by some mafia-like guys because they wanted it to. So, we arrive there, and find no direct clues as to where this guy is other than the barkeep said he was here like 3 months ago and has no idea where is know. So we sigh, settle in, and brace for a long chain of nasty fucking clues.

Anyway, we kind of immediately notice a trio of young would-be-adventurer mutants sitting at a table parches around something that seems very exciting and interesting. But any time we get close they just block it from view with something and starts talking loudly about the weather. So we settle in, and I use my psionic ability on one of them to see what they are seeing. So I notice they are looking at some kind of treasure map. Sweet, this is basically no-mans-land and every man for himself, and my character is pretty no-morals so I have no qualms for stealing that map. Besides, the wilderness is fucking dangerous, and these guys are total rookies. I am totally doing them a favor.

>>6571528
Yet that doesn't mean I want the commotion of having to murder them. So we settle down on another table where they are gambling to have an excuse to loiter around and see what these three rookies do.
At this table there's this really fucking creepy fox guy sitting around who is always grinning and some fat fucking human who talks like a faggot and claims to be some opera singer. Couldn't care less. We play a few friendly games, flinging minor cash here and there. Now, I'm not a good gambler, but not a terrible one either, so I manage to pretty much square out. The fox is on the total the winner though, and seems pretty gleeful about it. So much, in fact, that he decides to show us some super-sweet weapon that he has. It's some kind of high-tech pistol, and he claims it shoots rockets that could blow up this entire building.
Now, I am very interested, and I know nothing about tech, but I'm no fool either, so I have La, the robot, look at it closer. He does in fact tell me that it is very high-tech, but it doesn't shoot rockets. It's a laser pistol. The fox insists that it shoots rockets, but I tend to trust La in all his apathy. So I decide to get my hands on this sweet thing. Now, I stand up, and claim that we all have not been properly introduced, and wants to shake everyones hand. They aren't at all startled by this, instead glad of some sort of gentlemanly behavior, so they accept my hand, not even closely aware. So each time I shake a hand, I attempt to leech at their gambling skill. Devastatingly enough, I fail for both the fox and the fat singer. So, spur of the moment, I decide to also shake the hand of my companion, P, and leech his Gambling. He is not aware of this, but this time I succeed. I over double my skill value, while his drops to zero.
With this newfound skill, I manage to win a substantial pot of money.

>>6571541
The pair, obviously friends, seems devastated at this fact, and the singer says something that makes me believe they are nearly out of money. I decide to bluff it and sit down, content, saying how I wouldn't want to gamble for any more of their money if they are low on it. The fox bites, and says something along the lines of "This wasn't the way it was supposed to happen!" and insists on another game. I relent, and yet again stand up to clasp hands, saying "May the best man win!". He seems a little put off, but after a moments hesitation, accepts the handshake. This time I succeed at leeching his gambling skill. Sadly, it doesn't stack with the old leech, but replaces it, and my gambling skill actually ends up being slightly worse. But it's still a win, seeing how much worse off he is by losing the same amount. With this I can easily gamble from them their last strips of money and dignity. They are even more devastated, and I feign innocence and compassion, saying how "I never really wanted to do this". Then, I lay out the K.O.
"Ah, I am loath to ask this, but seeing as how you are out of money entirely, might I suggest a deal? I can buy that laser pistol that you showed me earlier for, what, say 50 credits? That should amount to even more than what you have lost?"
The fox obviously doesn't want to, but is eventually forced to, seeing how he is broke and pretty much stranded here otherwise. He does one final strike back though, and bargains it up to 90 credits. Still I take it, and is extremely content in getting a very, very effective weapon out of this whole deal for but a 1/6th, if even that, of it's usual cost. And my friends decide to pitch in too, wanting to have some ownership in this sweet piece of tech as well, so I end up only paying 50 credits for the deal in any case.

(I am just not able to write a short post am I?)

I have personally put my players through hell. Call it what you will, I have subjected them to every form of torture imaginable. Overpowered bosses, encounters far too high level for them, financially impossible amounts of traps, cruel NPCs and plain curmudgeonism.

And there is this one guy who keeps coming back and outsmarting me. And someday I will find a way to kill him, fair and square.

And it will be awesome.

>>6571259
>>6571376
Okay guys, that's actually pretty clever. My gaming group could probably help with this, if ever so slightly. At the very least, I could get web-space to host a forum on from one of them, and one or two of them might be interested in helping out in the actual work.
If you're interested, just pop me a mail with any shit in it to the above address, so I have your mails. My mail is already shit-full of spam as it is, no need to shit up yours by posting them publicly here. Although keep in mind I can be something of a lazy fuck, so it might be some time before this really kicks off, and it might not at all, if I'm too lazy. I'm just saying this so you don't get your hopes up too high, but I'm actually pretty psyched about it.

Anything else? I guess not. Eh, I guess I could mention I am aware my english in most of these posts can be pretty atrocious, but that's mostly because the posts are so long and I don't care to spellcheck something that long at all. I'm definitely knowledgeable enough in the English language to tackle this project.

There you have it.

thread saved for future reference
http://suptg.thisisnotatrueending.com/archive/6569983/