All of the Tyranids in my city gathered into a huge mega-swarm, which got napalm-bombed by National Guard helicopters.

FUCK YEAH.

BUMP

This sounds interesting.

Would this apply to vidja games?

>>9762288
Do you mean characters coming out of video games? I don't think that'd really fit with the whole theme that's been going so far.

Hello? Anyone out there? I'm in SoCal, one of the more remote regions, holed up in an motel, leeching wi-fi off an abandoned internet cafe.

The town's mostly empty, people probably fled when the furry yiffbands began to move en masse. I've been traveling in a minivan I managed to hotwire.

Well, not me, but my Kaolla Su figurine did something to it and now it goes from 0 to 100 mph within 2 seconds, and gets 50 miles to a gallon. Yeah, I know, hurr animu figurines. I never really was into Warhammer 40k, and I was a bit of a weeaboo, but after being through hell and back with my army of figurines, I couldn't care less what you think. They've been guarding my back, and I've been doing the same for them.

One thing I do regret about not having any Warhammer 40k sets is the lack of artillery power. I've been making do with lego sets, but from what some of you guys have been describing, they don't carry the same power as a...you guys called it a gargant, or titan, or something like that. Then again, I don't seem to have the same "Heresy!" problem to deal with that you guys occasionally have to talk your way out of.

If anyone's near Edward's Air Force Base, don't bother going. I checked out the place last week; the entire base was wiped out. A rogue army from the nearby town's figurine store took out the soldiers before they even realized what was going on. All the tanks and vehicles were gone too. Only clue I found to their presence was some weird green paste, and some sort of marking on the ground in the hangers and garages. It kinda looked like this picture.

>>9762725
Luks like itz time ta round up sum uf da boyz and git sum more for da WAAAGH.

thank god that I used to mod nerf guns
I now have rocket launchers, multi-rocket launchers, machineguns, sniper rifles that double as rocket launchers
who wants to stick with me

>>9762895

Are you anywhere near Lancaster, California? I could use some ground-to-ground artillery support.

>>9762288

not directly. Provided there was, say, a figurine or such of a character from a video game, then yes, but not someone jumping out of the screen.

>>9762589
The point of these threads is to act like SUDDENLY THE WORLD IS INSANE and all your toys suddenly come to life. Anyone you don't like is somehow a furry, and you have to battle evil toys with the good toys (And 40k toys of course), oh, and for some reason you have to do so in a way that makes it seem that despite a literal fight to the death going on inside every room of your house, you have to stop and post about it

>>9762924
Sorry bro, other coast.
when I get finished on expanding the air tank on my rocket launcher that shoots rockets bigger than my head, I'll let you know, though.
Maybe some coords for when I do?

>>9762945
Oh, and despite everyone on /tg/ being fucking obsessed about 40k, you have to pretend you know nothing about 40k

>>9762967

I don't really have a gps on me at the moment. I could try scavenging for one later though. If you can provide support all the way from the East coast, it'll be appreciated. My touhou figurines are pretty good at short bursts of area attacks, but they can only pull out 3 barrages at a time, before they have to resort to basic straight-line attacks, and most of the time, they're too busy fighting off aerial units to assist my Lego and various fig infantry.

>>9762973
>>9762945

this sounds epic

>>9763025
Touhou figurines?
Shit, I've gotta go down to the toys r us and see if I can get some more of those rocket launchers.
I have always wanted to wipe california off the face of the earth anyway.

>>9762973

lies

>>9763044

Yes. Touhou figurines. Weeaboo they may be, but they've saved my life on multiple occasions. Ever been ambushed and abducted by a 30-member furry yiffband? You'd be thanking anyone that manages to save you from a situation like that.

>>9763175
30? Try 60.
Shit doesn't matter when you've got two twenty round machineguns and a four round rocketlauncher.
Most people call looting a toys r us suicide, I call it a hobby.

East Coast here. Call me Boston, I guess. We're barricaded in my room. Those...THINGS, they used to be the furries. They're out there. They're clawing at my door. The yiffing. It's terrible. Luckily, I never got rid of ANY of my toys growing up, and they all seem to realize that I never just dumped them into storage either. I've got a sizable force in here, but we've lost contact with anyone in the other rooms.

The Decepticons thought they could get out there, scout around, see if anyone was okay. We'd have lost them if it weren't for the Turtles. Those furred beasts came down on them like lightning from an angry, ugly god.

According to the Turtles, word is, everyone out there's holed up, waiting for a signal of some sort.

Cap's rallied what's left of my Blood Angels and Witch Hunters. They've finished assembling their jump packs, too, so they won't be as useless, thank the Emprah.

Clone troopers, and those real American Heroes all stand ready for what may enter through the door. I'm not useless either. I've got my Nerf. Vulkan's set up on the table, and the trigger's just INCHES from my hand. She's primed and ready to go, as are the other guns at my feet.

The Legos aren't doing shit. They aren't hindering us, but they sure as fuck ain't helping.

There's a creak in the wood of the door. Sephiroth and the Deadpools seem to be tensing up.

If this is my last post, know that I died fighting.

I held the line.

>>9763312
Directing my new instrument of pain in your general direction, if you see this and can get me something more accurate, I can help.

>>9763259

Sounds like you've been through a lot. Sorry about the tone, it just kind of irks me when people are still holding on to notions like "ANIMU = DUMB HURR" in situations like this.

Jesus Christ, there's something nearing the motel, and it's bigger then any figurine or model I've seen yet.

I...I think it's one of the missing tanks. There's a bunch of little green guys riding around on top of it. I'll be right back, I have to go get myself and my army to a safer location, see if we can sneak away before they spot us. If any of us survive, we'll continue communication.

I'm starting to regret buying the number of Tyranids that I did... Thankfully, none of them can burrow, but of got a brood of gargoyles that keep dive-bombing me.

The Iron Warriors are bros, they've fortified my room pretty well - Used a metal trash bin as the framework for a bastion, and the nids are finding it hard to crack.

My Orks and Grots have been chasing my cats around - Apparently they think they're some weird form of hairy Squiggoth, and they want to add some dakka. The Angry Marine Terminators are patrolling the hall, and I think my Daemons have taken up residence in my shower. The Necron lord is sort of pitiful - He looks forlorn on my shelf, with just a single Flayed One to command.

Therians! Everywhere, I thought they were contained in their boxes. The overseers keep making storm Arachns they just hug things and explode!

The only thing between me and a horrable splody death is an alliance of IG and red blok. I don't think I even want to know where the marines fucked off to.

My monpoc minis come to life and wage awesome kaiju-warfare in my living room! Awesome!

My fucking Crustaceor has decided to kill all of the fish in my aquarium after it found that goldfish do not make good warriors. Now him, my Anglax, and a bunch of nautilus blasters and steel claw crabs are hanging out in the sunken ship toy, plotting to overthrow the surface world.

Thankfully they have yet to master the art of "climbing out of the tank."

This post is in memorium of a her. a HERO.

The door went down. Before any of us could twitch even a finger to bring down the pain, there he was. Swinging in on a zip line. I'd thought him lost in the first days of the siege.

BATMANKOFF!

He sacrificed himself so we could live. With a determined look, he gave me a quick salute. "Das Vidanya." And then it was all over. The miniature C4 he had on himself detonated. He took the whole roving band of furred monstrosities with him.

Luckily, this is still up and working.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kVdVTVR-j0Q
We're holding a memorial service after the cleanup.

Also, it looks like the Lego are shoring up where the door used to be. They're not as useless as they first seemed. That's all for now.

>>9763598
>This post is in memorium of a herO. a HERO.
Derp.

The Event, as I like to call it, didn't really hit my hometown too hard. There are some pro's to living in a small town that's barely evolved from a farm community. Nothing much really changed, the lego construct residing over the grade school is a bit off putting but it also means that school is closed down.

With no more school and a worldwide catastrophe shutting down the restaurant (people don't like to go out to eat when there's that small chance of being killed by tiny people) I'm pretty much stuck at home being bored.

The Small squad of SM I got from that warhammer starter kit does liven things up a bit. I convinced them to help me assemble the IG squad I bought last summer but never got around to building. Once that was finished we turned our attention to bringing the lotr risk pieces under control. They were a bit upset about being lost and scattered around the house back when I was 10. The evil factions do still complain about wanting to find the 'one ring' and such but the sheer size of the other figures keeps them in check.

It turns out that some of my old gi joes are back, and they've brought that giantass tank with them from wherever.
I suppose they could use a little more firepower, and maybe they can hit shit better than I can.
If anyone's in the richmond area, find me, I have backup, and I have weapons, and I can help.

>>9763577
Oh god I knew I shouldn't have bought all those Planet-Eaters, either. I have swarms of nasty little buggers running around destroying all sorts of shit in my kitchen.

My cats seem to delight in hunting them though, so it looks like the tide of extraterrestrial horrors is being kept at bay.

This might almost be interesting if it weren't just "hurf hurf my pretty girl figures and 40k toys and nerf WTFPWN guns are fighting a desperate battle against the suddenly legion furries"

Good God. . . I've got three footlockers of G.I. Joe and Transformers in my basement. . . Wife's gonna be pissed. . .

HOLY SHIT GUYS MY COUSIN OWNS A TOYS R US, I AM NOW YOUR FUCKING KING

After that I went through my attic to try and find anything.. or rather anyone else to recruit to my little army. It's a bit disconcerting climbing up a ladder only to get knocked back off by a shin high buzz lightyear. The army men I found had already killed off most of the cowboys and Indians that were also in the box and had created a DMZ to separate the greens and blues. When I arrived and threatened to squash them they decided to make peace.

After that it was pretty boring. I had them run mock battles and assaults. They attacked a few bugs and I let them loose in the crawl space. When they proclaimed it was clean I bought some easy mix cement and a few other supplies and started making myself a bunker.

I wanted the bunker to protect me just in case the bridge to Madison was taken. That was the only real threat to our town: the liberal college town across the river. Reports had already come in that most of Madison was in ruin, what the toys hadn't destroyed the gangs that migrated up here from Chicago did.

Once the Bunker was finished I stared moving all my belongings inside. I'd rather be prepared than not. As I was moving my things I dropped a few magic cards. I bent down to pick it up and as I did it looked different. It was a land, a swamp, but something looked off. When my hand touched it a wave of power coursed through me. Raw power just sitting inside you is an intense thing.

(continued from previous thread)

damn damn damn...

I've lost an arm... ive lost my freaking arm

Dunno what or who it was. Was ourt gettintg food. Brought 04 with me for the hell of it snd an extra set of eyes just in case. Made it to the store a few blocks away clean an d easy. Looked deserted, but only a littler busted up. Used tricorder to scan the place, found one life sign. Called in to see if it was safe, if person was hurt.

Fucker jumped me. burst out the store window and slicved my arm off somehow. Wasn't humn, not anymore. might have been a 'furry' people been talking about, but wasnt paying attention then. 04 jumped onto it before it could attack again, kept it busy.

used phaser to cauterise arm. what supposed to do, right? then turned the power up tomax and yelled for 04 to get clear. saw him running awat from the thing and fired. thing disappeared, disintigrated. made it into the store, grabbed as much as i could, shoved in backpack. got med stuff too.

made it back to house, dumped the fooid in the kitchen, took painkillers. can't think straigt now let akkone type... gotta rest...

my arm...

>>9763362

I've managed to get away from the hijacked tank, but not without getting pretty beaten up. Whoever...whatever was piloting that tank has some really shitty aim, that's for sure. Didn't stop shrapnel from breaking through the windows of the van and scraping me up some, though.

I'm currently heading northeast, further inland. I figure the more rural the area I head for, the less shit I'll have to deal with. I'd rather play a game of "Survive in the hicks for several weeks" then "Survive in a hellish apocalyptic cityscape filled with things that can kill me in a million different ways".

My god. The house next door is burning. The yards of the neighborhood seem to be splitting open as well.

All the forgotten, destroyed, and buried toys. They're rising. It's like some hilarious miniature zombie movie.

Wait. Are those Turbomans?

A single Furred broke down my door and tried to maul me. If it wasn't for the Vindicare shooting the thing through the eyeball, I'd be dead by now.

Seriously, don't engage these things up close if you can help it. They're like those Reavers from that sci-fi show.

Oh shit, the hospitals are pretty crazy, just a heads up, my mate tried to swat a death strike missile, the docs say he's lost the use of his hand.

>>9763673
I'm in the same boat here. You just reminded me that there was a school that I went to as a real young kid that was converted into some academy for troubled kids though. It's barely a few steps from my house and it's a perfect place to fortify myself after the AdMechs and Space Marines get finished up with what they need. My brother's Orks are just looking for spiky bits and trying to take control of any wildlife they see around here. That school if I remember right has a nice kitchen, bathrooms, and a bunch of other stuff which I'm sure the AdMechs can use to make what they need. They are content with the old PC I had and the lone PC our family never uses. If anything goes wrong at the place I'm moving to shortly, the other school is just a short drive away with triple the materials and fortifications needed. It doesn't have a kitchen though.
>>9763680
My brother's G.I. Joe's from when he was a kid are shuffling in the attic I think. I'm not sure what they are up to but I'll check soon enough.

Oh god why did I keep all my old army men. The green and tan tide never stops.

>>9763782
you...TAPPED it?

KILL THE FURRY. LOOT ALL NEARBY HOMES, PRESS THEIR FORCES INTO YOUR ARMY, AND KILL EVERY LAST FILTHY STINKING FURRY

...I never wanted children. Never, not at any point in my life. But now...

Well. It's quiet here, or mostly. We're so far from town that the trouble I've heard about has mostly passed us by. The neighbours had some trouble with a few rebellious Barbies, but that's it.

Thank god I was too poor to buy more toys. The ones I do have... the stuffed animals and things, they're just wandering around my room, now. Being cute.

The mermaids. Jesus fuck, the mermaids. They suffocated in their decorative display. I didn't get to them fast enough to save them.

At least Isis up there and that wizard with the metal staff have been keeping the dragons in line.

One of the saddest... my rag doll. She became a child for those few, desperate hours... and then she died. How could I have known my inability to sew up tears in cloth would leave her wounded and bleeding to death in my arms?

One of my porcelain dolls sits in my lap now. I chose her because she looked like me. And now I guess she's my daughter.

I have two lightsabers, one Sting sword and a pitchfork. The fairies are keeping watch.

These are my children now, and I will fight to protect them if I must.

0600:
Went scouting with some of the boys. Tans show no movement along dining-room table. Some troop movement spotted in direction of basement stairs.

1200:
Been defending against tan assaults for most of the morning. Carlson went down. He didn't even have time to feel it before he was a puddle of molten plastic. I capped the tan bastard that got him though.

Mortars keep falling around us. Damn plastic doesn't make for much of a defense. Gonna have to ask the big guy for better materials, we're getting butchered out here.

1430:
The damn tans pulled out some new tech. A big goddamn thing. Looked like some kinda... big fucked-up lizard. Had some crazy guns on it, melted our boys like nothing. What the fuck.

1600:
We're mobilizing for a final assault against the tans. General says the big guy got us some new hardware. Bigass trucks and shit moved with some kinda remote. Strapped some guns on it, ready to rock. We'll show those damn tans what for.
----

Guy I just found a tiny green clipboard with all this written on it. Was it bad to give my army men RC cars?

>>9764012
(we need more stories from the pov of the toys!)

Super powers are one thing, I think I could have handled being superpowerfull. This is insane though. I'm like a god. No scratch that, I am God. This isn't even me typing. It's the last extension of my humanity chronicling my decent. It is a warning to the rest of you. As I type this I am enslaving the people of my hometown. This once peaceful town being used as a sort of mana siphon.

Let me tell you something: There is no balance in real life.

>>9764048
wait....NOW CARD GAMES ARE EFFECTED......hahahahahahaha time to become a summoner! come her blue eyes white dragons!

itt people forget that they're thousands of times larger than little plastic figures.

I mean, jesus christ, I could take my 2000 point chaos army. I'd need some bandages afterwards but a few kicks or stompswould take out 90% of them

>>9764081
Three words:

Emrakul, the Aeons Torn.

Adios, reality. It's been fun.

>>9764081
if cards work, then so do books
I summon The Culture and win everything.

0730:
The assault on the tans went well last night. Tan plastic bits strewn about all over the damn place. Felt good. Got revenge for Carlson. Sarge says we're headed for the basement. I hear fucked up shit about that place. Weird things. Apparently the tans have been experimenting with shit down there.

1030:
We sent an expedition into the basement today around 0800. Haven't heard back from them since. I knew bad shit was going down in there.

1700:
Guess who gets to go into the basement? Me and some other jarheads are the point of the spear for the invasion. I don't know if I wanna go.

(time unclear):
OH GOD WHAT THE FUCK. I WANNA GO. THEY'RE ALL DEAD. EVERYONE GOT KILLED WE DIDN'T EVEN KNOW WHAT HAPPENED. THERE'S WEIRD SHIT DOWN HERE, MAN. SHIT WITH TOO MANY ARMS WITH LASERS AND ROCKETS. WE DIDN'T EVEN KNOW WHAT HIT US. GUYS JUST... FUCKING DYING EVERYWHERE.
THEY WONT GET ME
I'LL HIDE
I'M SAFE
SAFE
SAFE
SAFE
SAFE
S-

---

This was in my basement. I... I don't think toys are very fun anymore.

J-just typing this while I can still focus.

Oh god. Oh god. I never meant any harm. I thought if I put the foxmask on I'd be safe and the furries would pass me by.

It hurts. It hurts. It feels like a tail starting to grow in, and my face... my face is gone. Just the fox now. I don't know if I'll have my proper hands much longer.

I don't want to lose my mind I don;r wantrtolosemy mine mind mind... help me somebody helpme

PLEASE

>>9764127
people....I bring you dark news......it is confirmed....the furrys can breed with us....pic related....its staring at me from across the street.....I am going to grab my shotgun

I'm glad I really only collected Imperial units. I had a few tau, but they were easily destroyed. What few Space Wolves I had from my 3rd ed days are heading up my Guard Battalions. I'm glad I decided to get all those tanks, the Vanquisher companies saved my bacon. I'm working with the techpriests to get the reavers I was working on finished. I've got my lightnings running CAPs along with my BFG battlegroup. My Airborne are running patrols around my yard. 1st Infantry battalion has fortified my front walk along with my Perfect-Grade Strike, and my backyard is being held by 2nd battalion and my Buster, Strike, and Freedom. My Mechanised units and Master-grade GUNDAMS are holding as a mobile reserve. I'm working on trying to link up with the guy who runs 40k at my FLGS, he's got like 10k points of marines. If there's anyone in Ottawa with an Imperial army that can move, contact me. I'm sure with reinforcements we could take a school. I know one with a machine shop, kitchen, and storage, but we'd need at least 5 titans, and several regiments of Guard to hold it.

The large fool who claims domain over this land is currently busy looking for what he calls "snacks". Many of the others, those smaller and of equal height to myself seem distracted as well, watching the anarchy outdoors. I will free myself of the large oppressor and then shall finish my mother's work of ending this pathetic world. I may be able to persuade some of the others here to join me. The Robots that transform into guns and their compatriots will be worthy allies. Also, the black clad one with the breathing problem and the red energy blade. As loathe as I am to admit asking one as foolish as the masked idiot with the lisp, his small army of snake themed soldiers could help bring an end to those who do not see things our way. If there are any other tiny ones out there looking to overthrow their giant overlords, please respond.

The oaf returns. Is that some sort of chocolaty cake?

Last year, me and the guys cosplayed as IG storm troopers. They left their gear here for Otakon in a few months.

I have meltas, hot-shot lasguns, plasma guns, melta bombs, krak grenades, grav-chutes. . . I don't think it'd be smart to put on the uniforms. . .

But that melta I made? Is coming with me.

>>9764243
its just the furry costumes that you cant take off man the others you can! (I LOVE YOU IRON MAN SUIT!)

i liked this better when it was just tinyhammer, not this masturbatory bullshit

please tell me some more about what you want to do to furries

god i can't get enough of your boring autistic drivel smeared across /tg/

>>9764188
Huh. They grow up fast, don't they?

>>9764191
I forgot about 3rd Battalion, the artillery, and the armored... I've got 3 companies of Russes spread along the lines, and the artillery is stationed at each door. 3rd Battalion is patrolling the basement and the outer rooms of the house, looking for infiltrators. Most of the non-battle cannon russes are stationed by the Titan's I'm building, and the Vanquisher companies are with the mobile reserve. I'm beginning to think I should have got myself a Creed, I'm having trouble maintaining an effective command even with the advantage of size. I need to get the Sentinels back out on patrol, I've been hearing some things from the forward scouts. I hope its friendlies, I don't wanna have to waste my NERF ammo.

YES, GOD FUCKING YES, I AM NOW ABLE TO LIVE OUT MY TRUE LIFE, THE LIFE I WAS DESTINED TO LIVE. NOW I AM THE LORD AND MASTER OF A BUNCH OF TINY LITTLE MEN WHO CLAIM ME AS THEIR GOD EMPORER, AND ALL MY TIME AND ENERGY SPEND BUYING AND BUILDING THEM IS JUSTIFIED AS I FIGHT THE MENACE OF PEOPLE WHO I DON'T LIKE

>>9763788

Doing a bit better now. Marines are inside, but them and the admech and the armies are fortifying up the place as best they can so its all right. There's actually a bunch more now of actual Marine and IG armies. Apparently the techpriests made a communications tower on the roof while I was unconscious, using the com badge for parts. Called in "reinforcements."

That's probably what kept me from ODing on painkillers or something. The armies had medics that were able to keep me stable until, of all things, 04 managed to bring a 1/6 scale model of Ritsuko Akagi. Had a bit of a chuckle at that, but I'm glad she's around. If anything, she's used to working on living beings a good couple factors bigger than herself. She also figured out how to use the tricorder pretty quickly, which helped.

Oh, turns out that I actually had some extra help fighting off the thing at the store. Bobble-ninja snuck along, and helped out keeping whatever attacked me distracted. He had made a bunch of caltrops and stuff out of things like shaving razors, staples, and paperclips.

So, probably going to need to make another food/supply run, which will suck with the arm thing. This time I'm bringing support, though. Plus I'm going to take my neighbor's pickup (no idea where the guy himself is. Some of the army guys say he drove off in his other car a day or so back, and hasn't returned) for carrying capacity.

Ritsuko's glaring at me, and says I should get more rest, especially if I'm going to be heading back out any time soonish. She's got a point.

I'm glad I really only collected Imperial units. I had a few tau, but they were easily destroyed. What few Space Wolves I had from my 3rd ed days are heading up my Guard Battalions. I'm glad I decided to get all those tanks, the Vanquisher companies saved my bacon. I'm working with the techpriests to get the reavers I was working on finished. I've got my lightnings running CAPs along with my BFG battlegroup. My Airborne are running patrols around my yard. 1st Infantry battalion has fortified my front walk along with my Perfect-Grade Strike, and my backyard is being held by 2nd battalion and my Buster, Strike, and Freedom. My Mechanised units and Master-grade GUNDAMS are holding as a mobile reserve. I'm working on trying to link up with the guy who runs 40k at my FLGS, he's got the mash. He did the monster mash. We did the mash. It was a graveyard smash.

>>9764435

Internet SMASH PARTY?

A note to all survivors: Avoid central Illinois.
Furries abound. I am attempting to escape as we speak.

furries furries furries
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/tg/- furries and furry discussion

KILL THE FURRIES

KILL THEM

I WILL FEAST ON THEM

NONE SHALL STOP ME, I AM THE LORD OF TOYS

>>9764338 here

I'm glad I kept a sword with me. You weren't kidding about the fucking furries. I'm glad I kept my old cosplay armor around, knowing how to use a sword is a lifesaver. Now I wonder... does a NERF Recon act as a bolt pistol when the barrel and stock are taken off?

Why did I want to model what looked like cool last stand type scenarios with warhams? Now I've a shitload of Necrons, Chaos, and Nids all roaming loose doing nothing but wrecking up the joint! My Imperial and Tau guys couldn't do shite!
There's a goddamn vindicare around here someplace, too. He keeps pinging me and it's really annoying.

>>9764658
>>9764615
>>9764378
>>9764301
aaaand the fun police show up.
No more fun guys! This thread is literally causing these guys pain. in their butt regions.
stop whatever you're doing because these faggots don't like it!

>>9764775
SEE HOW THEY FALL UPON EACH OTHER, SEE HOW WORHTLESS THE HYUMAHN IS. WE SHALL FEAST, AND WE SHALL YIFF.

>>9764775
furries furries furries
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this is what i come to /tg/ to hear about

It's alright. They are just going to draw more attention to it anyway.

>>9764914

furries furries furries
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Tried using some Yu-gi-oh cards I had from some time ago.

They don't work.

Everything only seems to work according to fluff, I never really collected any figure or anything, neither have any cosplay at hand and my only companion is my old Dragonzord. he's alright, since he can usually fly and scout for me.

Everything is gone to shit though. Downtown was overtaken by all sorts of toys and shit. the markets where probably all looted by now, my only hope are the distribution companies, they are usually secluded and not many people go there to buy their stuff so there's a chance my workplace hasn't been sacked yet.

Digging out for toys I found an old "blaster". DAMMIT I shouldn't have donated all my racecar toys.

The omnisissia axe works. The robe is tougher then steel. I'm working on the facemask now...deus machina, I don't know what kind of effect it will have on me.

But without any 40k figures or any kind of military models to protect me, with only the inscrutable intelligence behind the lego and a handful of old toy figures trying to prepare as best they can, I need all the help I can get. It's a small town, but I hear things are getting worse by the hour.

If I'm still myself when it's complete, I'll try to make my way to the local university. They will have power, resources, technology...and once it is properly consecrated in His name...

After "Truth" told of using Magic cards, I tried my hand at touching my decks, only using my White, Blue and Green decks for safety's sake. The Grey Knights and Inquisitors insisted on watching over me as I did though. Stern was on my shoulder the whole time, ready to slice up my carotid if I slipped to the "Dark Side". My Black Templars weren't happy, but the Primes convinced them to at least give me a shot at it. I remain both surprised and encouraged by the nobility of Optimus Prime in all of his incarnations and his ability to bring the best out of people. Meanwhile, the "recruited" Imperial Guard units and other Chapters of Space Marines kept watch on the perimeter with Imperial Navy air support in the air.

... Long story short, I'm now a Planewalker. I don't know if I'm going to be able to outfight most other Planewalkers on Earth right now. My decks are outdated, but that might be my saving grace. In other news, my summoned creatures stay around instead of dissipating. Once I got my brother on board, we discussed the possibility of summoning the Avatar of Might. We're keeping it in reserve. Was fun to see a wolf antro get torn to shreds by a Old Silver Back Gorilla after thinking it could match the great ape's strength, or that cat anthro be surprised by my Opal Titan suddenly animating behind him while he was trying to sneak up on us during a resupply raid.

PART 1

The Smog Monster is in my bedroom.

The rubbery one, from the old Godzilla movie. I remember paging through the old Godzilla compendium and loving that thing. Pollution come alive--God's punishment on man for being so cruel to the environment! Never thought I'd have to fight the living embodiment of disgusting industrial poisons that my developing liberal mind was so eager to latch on to. God damn you environmentalists. You hear me? GOD DAMN YOU ALL.

My family's in critical condition. The hospital took them in but the police couldn't spare anyone to lock down my house. Something about a Toys R Us fire? For fuck's sake, people, my siblings and parents woke up with toxins in their lungs, this shit isn't right! And you can't even lend me a sidearm? Fuck all of you!

It's about the size of a Coke bottle when standing up. That's how I knew it was alive--it stood up straight when it saw me. Its entire body was glistening. Its eyes were glowing red. I thought it was a nightmare when I woke up last night--all I saw were those red eyes. But I blinked and they were gone.

It must have hid.

>>9765380

At about 4 in the morning there was a horrible series of screams from behind the grand piano in my room. I found a tiny dinosaur skeleton behind there, the carpet eaten in a puddle of acid.

I guess that was my first real clue. There goes my plastic T-rex, right? Obviously a hellspawn has arrived!

But I didn't really put it together till the rooms started filling with this choking smog. . . something like acid mist. My family came stumbling down. . . it rose, like smoke, to the highest floors. I can't imagine how many people I could have hurt in my dorm building. I can't believe I brought it to school. I can't believe I bought it in the first place. But how was I to know?

Now I've got a broom and a couple of water bottles and some cleaning solvents. Nothing else, really. I stabbed it with a fork when it flew at me this morning and it just reformed. How the fuck do you kill this thing?

My Tyranid models, shittily painted as they were, are sorely missed. I think it digested them as well. So much for the Great Devourer.

It's flying around my house now like a sick little frisbee. I can see it moving through the windows, crawling on the walls. Fuck this shit. I'm going in.

>>9764424

Heading out again. Hotwired the pickup truck with the help of the techpriests (who went through a half-hour long "Beseeching the machine spirit to the cause of our righteous need with the Holy Rewiring" or somesuch. Glad I expected something like that. Brought a book to read.) and set out. They also managed to rig up a temporary turret slot on the roof for the phaser, since I'll be having a hard enough time driving with just one arm. It's just barely welded on, but it'll have to do.

We're going to be trying to hit the convenience store again, local pharmacy (with ritsuko tagging along to identify the best stuff to take) and since I'm pretty much one of the last people who haven't left the nearest few blocks, all the houses I remember that had kids. Any hobby shops or toy stores are likely already cleared out, or have been overrun, so I'll have to make best with what I can get.

Time to go... I can only hope I don't lose any more pieces this time around.

Just got back from Drum Circle. Somehow, amidst the chaos, hippies, ravers and punks can still find time to get hammered in a city park. :3

We were sitting upon the crest of a hill drinking when we heard a thunderous crack. Apparently tyranids and squats had run into eachother while digging, and the fighting spilled out into the park itself. As we kept our distance, I noticed that a police van had arrived. Two officers simply began to deploy a sizable number of Arbites into the park. Pic related.

>>9765457

PART 2

Well that was fucking ridiculous.

I'm only writing this shit down because no one will believe me. I'm covered in acid slime which has eaten a lot of my skin. Trust me. . . it hurts. But I have more important things to worry about.

The inside of the house was coated with slime when I went in. The thing breeds fast. The bathroom was overflowing with what looked like puddles of primordial stew, the sink was a mess, and the cabinet where the trashcan was had started oozing slime that moved when I made noise.

So I decided, fuck the broom, it's time for some knives. I saw it sucking something out of the faucet on the sink--it probably found a way to get to the sewage? Anyway, it had doubled in size. Bad news.

I grabbed some knives, hacked at it. It popped like a balloon, red eyes dissolving--and a thousand little tadpole-looking things plopped into the sink and immediately wriggled from the drain.

I stabbed some of them. But a lot of them got away. When I heard the popping noise above me I wasn't fast enough--the cold wet sensation that slapped into my neck immediately began to burn.

Then there was a tiny buzzing noise, and a little foomping sound--this is where it gets fucking weird, I warn you.

A little black thing whizzed past my eyes--with little glowing rods attached, and the larvae on my neck gurgled, and I flailed. I dropped to the floor and rolled--the larvae popped off and the little black thing zipped over and stuck the rods in.

It was Frederick. I was a bit of an obsessive as a younger boy. . . I'd built this character out of minifigure pieces, played with him countless times, built and destroyed cities with him and my brother's characters. We had given all the LEGOs away--but not this guy. I remember now, I kept him in my backpack. For safekeeping.

Safekeeping, indeed.

Don't let the Furfags ruin the thread! FOR THE EMPEROR!

_____________________________________________

I grabbed my 5000 point Lizardman army/50 points of Rainforest Goblins and went down to the local plant nursery, I covered the concrete floor in three feet of potting soil and covered it in knee-high plants, I'm sleeping in a steel shed connected to the main Greenhouse, the glass is bulletproofed and the Lizards have guaranteed that nothing will reach the sheds door with functioning legs and blood that isn't poisoned.

Sigh.

Look, even if they came to life with magic powers and shit, you're still hundreds of times larger then they are, and can kill them dozens of times over with a swift kick.

Seriously, you are like the largest Titan to that Space marine, a titan that can dance and move faster than any other titan. You can brutally murder them a dozen times over. There's no world wide apocalypse just because you've got animu figures and army men, jesus christ.

Most of the world doesn't even have toys.

I used to be the mascot for my high school football team (Timber Wolves! Fight Fight Fight!) when it happened. We had just finished a full dress rehearsal for Home Coming so I was completely suited up except for the head of the costume, I'm assuming that's the only reason I'm still sane. I was the last one there because I was having trouble finding the damn zipper under all that fur and the claws on my gloves weren't helping the matter at all.

I eventually went to the mirror to try and find the zipper, and that's when I noticed that the usually baggy outfit was fitting to the skin around my neck. I flipped the fuck out and nearly cut my head off with my claws before I calmed down.

I couldn't go back to my house after that, so I high tailed it (bad pun) to the woods a few miles outside of town. I didn't know what a furry was, I had heard some of the stranger kids talking about the stranger kids talking about them, but I never payed attention. Over the next few days I found out just how close I had come to Damnation.

>>9765677
SHUT UP TROLL

SHUT UP

SHUT UP

YOU'RE NOT FOOLING ANYONE

WE'RE HAVING FUN, SO YOU CAN'T COMPLAIN

>>9765660

this thread's already ruined

>>9765677
Oh, thread's over guys. Everybody pack up and go home.

>>9765837
STOP RIGHT THERE, CRIMINAL SCUM

Fuck this bullshit down here in Texas.

Shit, this place is fucked up. I'm heading north. I lucked into crashing the GW store before anyone else did- now I've got their fancy-ass painted armies. I took the Iron Hands- the IG wanted to keep the perimeter of the store safe, and the 'nids had already fucked off. I told them about the eating places next door; they really appreciated it.

So now I'm getting the hell outta Dodge in my car, armed with Iron Hands and some Mechanicus I dug out of the backroom, some Maximals, and my Nerf shotgun. My car reeks of incense and the big old Nipper dog in the back seat is whimpering because he doesn't like how fast we're going.

Fuck that; my car's blessed by the Omnissiah. I'm going to go as fast as I can.

>>9764110
>>9765677

Eh. My story is justified. Hedorah is a fucking TOXIC ARMADA all by himself. He manufactures POISONOUS GASES in vast quantities. Not good enough for you? Well, you'll notice I DID stomp my Nid armies, because that's what would fucking happen.

Hedorah, though. Jesus. Fucking thing is in the sewers. Guess it's time to go to Canada.

>>9765812

Alright then, if your going to crash a thread, it might as well be with lesbians.

rolled 41 = 41

>>9765916
Now you see why I want to exterminate this species?

>>9765916

Lesbians straight out of Skeet Fighter...

>>9765937

yeah, humans are really fucking gross

>>9765916
NOW who's judgemental!? I thought you understood OP, but no, you're just like the fun police faggots. GO TO HELL

>>9765916

I imagined this spoken in some sort of Slavic accent, a la "Everything Is Illuminated"'s Alex.

LEZ-BEEYANS.

rolled 96 = 96

>>9765960
I don't find them physically disgusting, I just think they are a terrible scourge on reality. All realities.

rolled 52 = 52

>>9765980
Your post confuses me.

The local park has been overrun with Fantasy-Battle Orcs and Goblins, thankfully the local AdMech have built an electric fence around it and some laser turrets for any flying targets.

Hey, I'm just saying it's marginally less annoying then Gay Porn, Furry Shit, and Motivational Poster Spam.

Lets get on with the thread, shall we?
_____________________________________________

The Greenhouse was besieged by Orks today, the Slann and Skink Priests kept them from damaging the glass, and the Saurus and Kroxigors took out any Orks that got through guerrilla style. I'm going to need to make a supply run soon, maybe get some Catachans while I'm out.

>>9765992
Jesus tap-dancing christ. I'm usually tolerant to people, but damn, when it comes to stuff like right out of 2girls1cup, just... makes me want to glass half the planet in a pattern that reads, "THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS!"

rolled 71 = 71

>>9766343
How would you fit that? seperate words on different continents?

>>9766386
No, I'd glass my own continent because it's the shithole of the world. Fuck you, North America. I wouldn't even write on you with bombs. South America... I'm sorry, but you're big enough to write, "THIS IS WHY WE CAN"T HAVE NICE THINGS," on.

>>9766314
This is >>9765869 here

Hit a radio shack before you hit a finished-goods store; the bitz there will be more useful.

But if you do, prepare to be stuck there for a while because they fucking putter around and hem and haw over every single fucking piece.

I've been at this one shack for nearly an hour now, but they say they can upgrade a busted super-soaker I have into a flamer, so I'm not complaining.

rolled 43 = 43

>>9766445
That actually sounds like a good way to reinforce my authority in the minds of the human populace when they step out of line after I conquer the world. Next Wednesday.

>>9766343

For the Love of God, will you just ignore it? it seems like it's stopped now anyway.
_____________________________________________

Supply run was...Profitable, I had to wade through Orks and duel a me-sized Gargent but I did get some extra Lizardmen and a Fuckload of Catachans, while I was gone the Slann had the other Lizards mining the concrete floor of the Greenhouse and building a wall all around the Greenhouse about a foot away from the glass to hold off any Orks that put a hole in it, with Catachans along the walls we even managed to push them back, the I.G. don't like working with Xenos, but their getting along in the face of a common enemy.

>>9766493
You always say next Wednesday. It's Wednesday right now. I don't see what difference a week of time is going to make, so why not start, y'know, now?

rolled 70 = 70

>>9766556
Waiting for a shipment. Hardware for injection molding.

>>9766478

I'll give it a shot... but it might get a bit dicey. Only radio shack nearby I know of is in the local mall... which is right next to the local "toys r us." There's a couple basic electronics parts stores in town, though, so I think I'll try those first. Although, scouting out that area might be a good idea anyway... see if it looks like anything might try swarming in from that direction.

>>9766768

Why are killing the thread?

THE END

THE THREAD STILL LIVES?!

Goddamn Tyranids just ate my fish, it's on now...

>>9767427
I also was very interested in the lore of 40k Hammer; the universe fascniated me and, as was my wont, I created scale replicas of almost every Empire weapon and a few of the alien ones, too, including (for some bizarre reason) a Tyranid Fleshborer. I even created a cosplay of Star Marine Scout armour and half-finished a Tau Stealthsuit before I realised I wouldn't physically fit into it.

When the Event hit...the world turned upside down.
I won't go into the details, since by now it has been written about so much that everyone knows the story. Toys...came to life. It was small at first, isolated cases. Then things escalated - people started dying, wars began breaking out and the world fell to pieces.
But the rise of the Furred is what destroyed everything.

When whatever the hell was causing the cosplaying freaks to...change...hit our town, I was smack bang in the middle of my own toy problem. But it wasn't the usualy deal of tiny little men scampering around - it was two dozen Titans ranging from a foot in height to the size of a toddler stomping around my flat, smashing through the crappy furniture and trying to engage eachother in combat.
I'd been following the crazy stories on the internet for a few days and was able to gather my wits quickly enough when the first Warhound suddenly looked up and jumped down from the shelf, advancing menacingly on the Tau Titans. Realising what was happening, I rushed across the room from behind the Warhound and grabbed it by the 'shoulders', hauling it away from the Tau. It must have still been groggy, because it couldn't quite seem to work the weapons, only managing to spin the gatling cannon up a few times.

(continued)

>>9767451
>>9767475
>>9767490
>>9767505
>>9767523
Real mature lol.

>>9767604
Moving fast, I tried to remember everything about the 40k universe and began isolating my toys. The five Tau went in one room, the ten Imperial Titans went in another, the three Bio-Titans were locked in the bathroom and the two Eldar were stuck under the stairs. I left my three Ork gargants where they were, in the corner of the loungeroom, but blocked them in with the couches.
The Angry Marine Titan, Maximus Fistus, I locked the closet. It didn't like that, and swearing rang through the house from it's megaphones.
I spent the next few days 'taming' them and teaching these toys that they shouldn't fight eachother and needed to respect me. It was awesome and fucked up at the same time.

Needless to say, when the Furred Ones attacked, I was ready. A platoon of Titans at my command, and me in my Scout armour with every weapon from the 40k universe at my disposal.

I can't believe someone would tolerate that shit long enough to copypaste it.

>>9766698

...

I am not going back to the mall... not until loooong after this all ends (if it ever does).

First glimpse of the parking lots... rubble. complete rubble. The road heading in was fine, but once inside there was nothing but blasted craters and fallen lampposts and so on. The Marines used the rangefinders built in to their armor to scan for anything moving. They spotted smoke coming from a blown-out wall of the Toys R Us (yeah, wasn't going to go near there), and a few bits of scattered movement from the treeline that they suspected was NOT just the wind, but otherwise it seems like it was clear.

I had worked here during winter holidays way back in high school, so I knew a bit about the maintenance/loading hallways. Driving the truck to one of the bay doors was torture, but we made it. Burned a hole in the bay doors with the phaser, and we headed in.

Since I had no clue as to proper military tactics, I let the Marines run things from that point, with the caveat that if I said 'run' we would doubletime it back to the truck (we left some Guardsmen there with radios in case anything happened on that end).

We make it in, and aside from a few scorch marks nothing seems wrong except how quiet it is. We make it to the door leading to the video shack backroom and once again use the universal door opener. Marines head inside to check for hostiles... and found some. All I hear for a bit is bolters, and some sort of return fire, before eventually the marines give the all clear.

>>9767994

A bunch of melted plastic was scattered around the room, and with the lights out I couldn't tell what they were originally from. Fortunately nothing from the mall proper seemed to hear the fight, and the stores right next to this one were just clothes stores... While Some more stuff to wear might be nice, I didn't want to find out if manikins were affected by the animation effect as well...

We cleaned out the back room in a couple trips... the miniatures carrying what they could (we had even brought a decent sized RC truck and hooked it up to some kid's wagon) but I had to carry/move most of the stuff.

Once that was done, most of the miniatures stayed back at the truck while me, 04, and the marines went to check the storefront. We head out there, and there's no power in the main thoroughfare or other stores. I pocketed a few more items from the shelves... batteries and such... When I got near the store window/walls at the front, I heard this loud... something... coming from the direction of the foodcourt.

I decided that things had been nice enough already, I wasn't going to push my luck anymore and we ran for the truck. Rode as fast as we could out of the parking lot without tossing anything out of the back, all the while checking the mirrors.

We got home, though, and I'm breaking out the alcohol for all of us. Partly as a victory celebration for the 'mission', partly just to calm my nerves...

Drat... Ritsuko says I can't due the amount of non-prescription painkillers I've been taking, but I take the stuff out for the guys who came along and 04 anyway. Well... the techpriests just want to get to work, but the message is there.

Make myself some tea, then... that usually calms me down a bit...

>>9768050

(and that's it for me tonight. putting aside the trolls, I'm just falling asleep here it's gotten late... Keep up the good fight, fellow writefags!)

Yeah, so the IG guys killed all the tau and brought the tech priests their stuff, which they're using to erect so kind of... force field around my house. I tried going through it, but I just ran into what felt like a wall. So now I have 10k+ Imperial Guardsman marching around, and 500 techpriests making fucking helicopters with laser cannons strapped to the bottom.

I ended up having to kill all the eldar in my garage. I just dropped a concrete block on them a few times. The techpriests all salvaging that too.

Not sure if it's heresy...

New Mexico and the Southwest reporting in.

The LARPers from ENMU were mostly Orcs. Now they're all Orcs. We're holding them off for now, but we're going to need reinforcements soon.

My friend's tinyOrk army follows him into battle every day. He had over 180 Ork models, but when The Event occured, suddenly he had a miniature WAAAAGGH! on his hand. I can't even count the little fuckers, there's so many of them. They're like a gigantic, screaming ant swarm that devours the LARPers. Shin-high Gargants blow holes through the LARPer's stomachs and light them on fire at close range.

My friend, or "Da Boss", sometimes calls in the aid of my tinyGuard. As with the tinyOrks, when The Event occured, my models seemed to have double or tripled in number overnight. I'm commanding several army groups at once, but it's still not enough. There seem to be more LARPers every day. I think they find random people on the street and force them to dress up or something, but I can't confirm.

rolled 9 = 9

>>9768773
I think the orks or 'nids will come out on top in the aftermath. They can reproduce faster, which wouldn't be an issue in 40k, but here, where the model population is so much less than the fluff pop., the procreational advantage should win one or both of the races the day in the end.

I guess I was lucky. The figures I kept were mostly heroes. After the initial skirmish, those that survived spread out and came across eachother. A few more were dismantled in the confusion of first contact, but heroes recognize heroics. The first time one of them sacrificed himself for another, the fighting ceased... Until it came time for there to be a leader.

It was getting heated. The blond muscle head with his lighting tossing sword. The Joe's and their laser rifles. The legos just hid in the corner. I thought my house would be a toasty grave.... Until HE stepped up. I am so glad I made him a prop as a child. And this Prime deserved that Matrix. He talked them down, and convinced them to rally behind me. Claiming only a natural creature could know the threats ahead.

And so we are here, trying to figure a way to town... waiting for it to show a weakness... never dreamed my own creation would turn on me... 7'6" iron and steel. Death itself in skeletal form, aflame just as it was when I first created it.

It waits, always at the edge of our vision. it's out there, and it will bring death if we try to leave.

It suddenly occurred to me that neither Nids (who travel in realspace by farting) nor Orks (who get on a Rokk and wait till it crashes somewhere) possess the ability to engage Eldar craftworlds.

Inquisitor Akron has me typing this. Not that I normally mind, but having your own damn model telling you what to do is a little humilitating. But having looked it over, he has a point.

Adress follows:

I am Akron, I dont know how this mess started, but by The Emperor I know how its going to end. I got snatched from the middle of a confrence with my team, reduced to the size of a damn chess peice, and forced to work with the kind of Heritics most of my order puts down without hesitation. I have been forced to seriusly consider, for the first time in my life of service to The God-Emperor, the basic foundations of my belifs. I have reached a conclusion that I felt ought to be shared.

It doesn't matter what we might belive, we need to deal with the threats of this world now. When you meet yourself, those legends who thus appear in large numbers, do not dispute command! Maby I am just some animated toy, a trick of the warp bleeding through. What diffrence does it make? I have seen more things beyond my ken in these last two days then I belived even existed. Ships burning as they exchange fire over the freeway with armed chaos units. I have seen Furrys, those damned abominations that only Chaos could consider working with, charging over their own dead like tyranids. I have seen these "mobile suits" and their pilots equal the Space Marines in their valor and brutality. I have watched as alpha plus psychers larger then a Leman Russ unleashed pink death upon the hordes of hostles that assail our refuge. I have drawn a conclusion from this. Wherever we are, whatever we are, the massive natives of this planet need our help to survive this storm.

>>9769573
To that end: Break your foes into three sizes.
The "tiny" like ourselves, who we can fight on even terms, but the natives have such a hard time dealing with.
The "medium" that straddle the lines, from seven local inches up to the size of warhound titans. To them fall the mechanized fighters, the "Mobile Suits" and large tanks.
and the "Large" Those horrors like the 'furrys' which only massed effort or the natives themselves can stand off.
Lastly, the flyers of all sizes, threats from above who hold the high ground, and must be delt with lest any possition become compromised.

The natives are civilans, their militarys are outclassed as much as guardsmen against the hordes of Chaos demons, and many of them fell to Orks or Tyranid hordes in the intial hours of fighting, but those that remain can give potant aid and succor to the civilans who for now cower behind us, the small.

To those who stand with their native tools, or the objects this warp spill has made into weapons, help them as best you can, they are few in number, and their bravery has lead most of them to death at the start of all this.

You need to find a Bulma figurine, not just any Bulma, there are some models that includes the Radar Dragon. Perhaps you can use them to locate toy version of the Dragon Balls and wish this nightmare away. I'm going to try it, I only know one place that might have her, and it's probably going to be a One way trip only.

Wish me luck.

It was a relatively quiet night. Inquisitor Castus discovered a plan to betray me by that silver haired faggot Sephiroth. He was quickly and quietly put into a cell(drawer) and has been having untold horrors enacted upon him by Karamazov and the other Witch Hunters.

The quiet of the night was disrupted just after sun up. and the theory I'd had, and feared, since the event has proven true... His medallion. It was made REAL! Why me? I wasn't even a troll. I just laughed. Do I really deserve this?

Dammit! He's just so fast!

He came like lightning with a toy army greater, and more terrible, than anything I'd ever seen. By the Emperor! Are those My Little Ponies made from clay and human hair?

My forces have been crushed. There are limbs, heads, whatever, scattered across the house. Inquisitor Castus is all that remains. Nerf's just about out of ammo. Even the Legos were destroyed. They did nothing to him, yet he still had them shattered. He's faster than anything I'd ever seen.

Wait! Pandora's Box! Of course! It came with GoW3! It might have some power! I can see it across the room. Checking my Maverick, I've got one shot at this. I doubt this'll take him down, but it should still strike a blow to his forces. Maybe even weaken him a bit. for the next hapless soul he comes upon. Castus is nodding his tiny little head. He was the first of my Miniatures. Now he's the last. It's fitting.

We won't survive this.

I've got one shot.

Time to make it count.

This is the nerdiest shit I've ever heard of.

>>9774664
Meh, at least it's very entertaining. Fun to see what sort of imagination some people have regarding this.

Oh, god... Is anyone getting this?.. I escaped THEM. But not before... OH GOD THE HORRORS! THE AGONY!

They.. They are organising. The... The furfags. Getting together... Even now I can still hear them...

Yiff.. Yiff.. Yiff..

Oh, god. Someone! ANYONE! HELP ME PLEASE! DON'T TOUCH ME YOU! STAY THE FUCK AWAY! NO NO OH GOD NOOOOOOOOO!

/tg/, I bring FANTASTIC news.

>>9764338 here

During a quiet spell between furry and nid raids, I decided to see if sitting down behind my Steel Battalion controller did anything. I am now in the pilots seat of a fully armed Quasar, and am now wrecking those furred fucks shit. If you have Steel Battalion, USE IT! USE IT BEFORE THE FURFAGS DO!

Guys! Guys! Are your reading? I'm posting from Europe! IT JUST STARTED HERE! Thank god I'm in a GW. MASSIVE ARMY. We've got around 2000 spess mehreens from different chapters, MASSIVE SWARM OF 'NIDS, and the tau are having a MASSIVE GREATER GOOD PARTY. I've been assigned spess puppy lord-commander.

Wait a sec, the guys are cheering, brb.

Euro here.

TITANS! MASSIVE ARMY! IMPERATORS! WARHOUNDS! REAVERS! EVERYTHING! TITANS!

TRY AND GET IN HERE NOW FURFAGS!

hey guys, whats gonna happen to scripticarius?
he finished his angron model

bump

I just killed my friend.

I had to, you know. I didn't have a choice. She would have killed Taylor and me otherwise. It was so sudden. I was just walking down the path from the dining hall to my dorm, when I saw someone looking down at me from the roof. At first I thought that it was just some drunk girl who had managed to climb out of a window, but then I saw the wolf tail. And then I saw the slavering, fanged muzzle. I opened my mouth to scream, but the impact of her pounce knocked the wind clean out of me.

I mean, I knew she was a furry, but she had only mentioned it once so I didn't think it was a big deal. But Jesus H. Christ, I had no idea she actually owned a fursuit! I think she was trying it on one last time before college ended when it took her. She would never read 4chan; she wouldn’t have known about the danger. Anyways, she damn near tore my throat out before something blasted her off me in an explosion of green light. It was my friend Taylor. Thank God for him and his Covenant figures, especially those Hunters. I think he and his figures had flushed her out onto the roof before she jumped me.

>>9776179
I scrambled to my feet, trying to put as much distance between me and that…thing as I could. The Hunters’ fuel rod cannons had hurt her pretty badly when they knocked her off me; there were huge patches of charred flesh in her fur, and she was missing an ear. She growled at me, her eyes filled with a bestial hunger. Good God, her eyes. Apart from the fur-covered tits, they were the only distinctly human things about her.

Taylor had his giant Nerf sword and a Maverick pistol. He tossed me the pistol, motioned the Elites and Hunters to stand back, then damned if he didn’t flat-out charge her like an idiot. He didn’t stand a chance against her one-on-one, even if he was a six-foot-two baseball player with a huge sword. She was a goddamn anthropomorphic wolf. Even as badly wounded as she was, she had no problem dodging him. And then shit got real.

She leaped onto his back and started tearing into him with her claws. The Elites shouted and ran forward with their energy swords, but I beat them to it. It must have been a crazy adrenaline rush or something, I don’t care. All I know is that in about two second flats I had sprinted over with the Maverick and emptied all six rounds into her head.

>>9776189
Well, there’s not that much else to say. The Elites knew some basic battlefield first aid but they had no idea how to use it on a human, so I had to patch Taylor up as best I could. We’re taking the bare essentials from our rooms, and seeing if we can round up some extra food from the dining hall. Taylor’s got a car, so we’ll be heading for the GW store in Philadelphia to round up some more muscle.

I just keep on touching the pocket where I put her pendant. Her head was pretty much gone so it was impossible to identify her face, but I knew it was her by that little silver crescent moon she would always wear. Dammit, I hope we don’t see any more furries. You can’t trust anyone these days.

Oh, and one more thing…I called my parents to tell them what’s happening, but I think they know already. They said they’ve seen some pretty big bugs in the basement recently. I own a Tyranid army. Let’s just hope my Inquisitor and the Sisters can keep them under control.

Someone needs to put all of this new material up on the Tinyhammer entry on 1d4chan.org

bump

>>9776352
It seems like it would warrant its own setting entry IMO. Tinyhammer is about adapting to life with 40k minis coming to life in your house, while this setting is about all toys/minis/models coming to life, prop weapons/devices becoming fully functional, and face-covering/altering costumes permanently changing the wearer once they're put on. It started as a Tinyhammer variant, but it's much more than that now.

so, uhh, i was playing a game of magic when the change hit. I've got this saproling combo i do that gets me infinite 1/1 tokens with the ability to sacrifice themselves to give their controller life or make them all more powerful (Nemanta, grove guardian, elvish farmer), and i'd just started the loop. my neighborhood is now covered in loyal-to-me plant-things.

i just drew Gaia's cradle, does anyone in kansas need help?

also, 'life gain' feels, really, really good. my friend was playing a white deck, he cast healing salve, apparently 'gaining life feels like having the best sex you could imagine combined with how good the real hard-core drugs make you feel, but it's actually good for you'

I'm kinda scare that if i sacrifice one of my saprolings to heal myself of anything i'll become addicted and flood the world with saprolings to keep my supply of the new superdrug going

anyone have any advice?

bump

And also putting out a request to anyone who can make a new page for all this awesome on 1d4chan.org

HULK HANDS MOTHERFUCKER
MY ORKS REVERE ME AS GORK INCARNATE
THE FURRIES FLED IN TERROR WHEN I PUNCHED ONE'S HEAD OFF AND THREW ANOTHER SO HARD HE SONIC BOOMED
I'M TYPING THIS WITH ONE FINGER
I CAN FEEL THE RAGE GROWING INSIDE ME BY THE MINUTE
DAMN IT FEELS GOOD

>>9778497
Please tell me he was actually a Hedgehog furry.

Good news and Bad news.

The good news is that I found Mickey, and he's pretty much in character.

I'm not talking about a mickey doll, I'm talking about a Adult Sized Mickey.

The poor bastard is traumatized, apparently the Furries around here are trying to increase their ranks. that spectaculary backfired on them, the characters are transformed in context, so if you donne a Mickey costume you slowly turn into Mickey.....what did these fuckers do to him? poor guy he's sobbing every few minutes.
I heard some explosions an maybe a yellow figure in the distance running away from the place the furries where located. I think they tried taking advantage of someone who disagrees with Yiffing.

Mickey says he still remember who he was but it's starting to fade away. He also told me there are dozens of people trapped out there. I'm only one guy I can't do this by myself, someone has to do something.

Well my nids have clawed their way out of my gaming case and immediatly tried to eat me. Turns out that if I concentrate hard enough, i can controll 'em. So far its been pretty awesome. The swarmlord i made keeps giving me these glare every so often though, will have to keep an eye on him.

Bumping to spite the spammer and keep this great thread (minus the spammer) alive.

>>9781634

Why do you people like scat so much? What is it about being full of hate that makes you want to play with doodoo?

>>9781674
I don't like it. I just like the thread besides the stupid story/copypasta or whatever it is the guy who hates the thread is posting.

>>9781880

For some reason, whenever I see you people talking about how much you hate the nerds you aren't much better than, there's always scat being posted, though. What gives?

>>9781896
I'm not trying to be "better" than anybody, just saying my disdain or disgust for stuff that the person who seems to hate the thread is posting because, frankly, it doesn't belong on the thread or this board. /tg/ is one of the best boards I've been to and all the person is doing is slowly making it worse.

Thank god I bought that nerf vulcan, and nerf longshot, and maverick, and firefly, and well shit just everything, and I got my tau commander to round up all my lego minifigs and I've been having an lol time marching them around a bit. No furries as of yet except one who i suspect was an old friend, first time I got to use my Vulcan it was pretty funny watching him dancing around and eventually die. I even managed to put together my Tau piranha now and even the risk pieces make a nice little army by themselves. And man is it wild watching my old hot wheels go at it around the house.

>>9781896

I hate furries and I love eating some fat turds, buddy. Problem?