WE ARE BUTLER, 100% PURE DAPPER AND SWAG.1 A butler may not injure his mistress or, through inaction, allow his mistress to come to harm.2 A butler must obey the orders given to him by his mistress except where such orders would conflict with the First Law.3 A butler must protect its own existence as long as such protection does not conflict with the First or Second Laws.>ARCHIVES HEREhttp://suptg.thisisnotatrueending.com/archive.html?tags=Mahou%20Shounen%20Quest>archive.foolz HEREhttp://archive.foolz.us/tg/search/subject/mahou%20shounen/order/asc/-=-=-=-=-=-=-LAST TIME=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-Erica and Gai manage to get back to the bridge where their chopper crashed after walking up-stream from where the river swept them earlier.There, a huge amount of police and firemen are working to divert the traffic and gather evidence from the still smoldering vehicles."dammit. We can't get to the clock like this." She comments as she shakes water out of her damp hair."We have to wait till they're gone." Her partner says as he sinks back into the bushes by the side of the road."Okay, we'll wait. But as soon as we get our time punched, we're finding a vehicle, something beefy, something tough, and we're going after them again." She says as she does the same begrudgingly.She takes the map from her partner and tries to find the nearest military installation.
BUENO!!!!
>>19703079Haha! Inb4 Fritz!
>>19703079But anyway, on to serious topics.>tries to find the nearest military installation.Erica is probably going to be coming after us next with either a tank, gunship, or...jet fighter/attacker.
Prepare Molotov AA gun. Use whatever we have available.
>>19703079Fuck i was switching computersFuck yeah
>>19703146It's Erica Hartmann. It's going to be a fighter jet.
rolled 35 = 35Alrighty then, let's get the part started, eh?
You open your eyes to find yourself in front of that mansion you vaguely remember.You've seen this place in your dreams before, and you're sure that this is another dream as well.You stand up from under the tree you found yourself at and walk around. This isn't anything new to you and so you don't even react to it anymore.You just walk into a hedge-maze to pass time, waiting for this to end.You turn a corner and bump into someone, now THIS you didn't expect.It's A-tan, Tenousou Athena, but she's different...She's a little girl again, about the same age when you first met her."A-tan..." You reach out to the lass.She gives you a quizzical look and asks, "Who are you?"---------------------------------------------------Ayasaki Susan wakes up abruptly due to a dream she can't quite remember.She settles into his arms and tries to go back to sleep
>>19703252SUDDENLYPLOT
>>19703252Oh, wait. Now that there's two Hayate's in this timeline, does that mean that A-tan is getting double the amount of majaik, and might be able to accelerate her plans?Or is the majaik drain still only affecting this timeline's native Hayate?
>>19703351Better be both, otherwise it's just not fair.
>>19703351We'll have to get that tested soon.Could also be same net drain spread across us both for half the drain each.
>>19703403Oh yeah, that's another possibility, too.
>>19703252oh FUCK
"Nyahaha This is easy!" Lime comments as she stuffs another twinkie into her maw."Hey, can you hand me one of those?" The driver, Touma asks his temporary co-pilot."Ehhhh... But I got them all for myself." The childish marionette answers. "Just one please? I'll trade you a red-bull for it.""hmnnn... Okay!" Lime answers with a grin.-----------------------------------------------------------------Lime throws out her 7th empty can out of the window.It bounces off the road twice before hitting the windshield of a car that was parked behind a billboard.That car, unfortunately, was a cop-car.And the can just woke up the police officer that was napping inside."Distpatch, I think I just found that blue monster-truck the guys from Ohio were looking for." He calls-in on his radio. "I'm going in pursuit, send back up."He turns on his siren and begins to drive after you.In the truck, Touma takes a look in the rear-view and sees the red and blue lights coming up behind you fast."Shit. Shit. Shit.... It's the cops!""NYahahahaha! Full speed ahead!" Lime, all hopped-up on red-bull, says."We can't outrun him!" Touma tells her."We can!" She slams her foot ontop of his and drives the gas pedal into the floor.**ROLLEM**>Taking the highest of the first 5 rolls
rolled 93 = 93BEHOLD
rolled 48 = 48>>19703445Dice.
rolled 75 = 75>>19703445Guess that's the nat1 coming back to haunt us.
rolled 8 = 8>>19703445>>19703455Ahaha
rolled 20 = 20>>19703445No, no, no. We're in a monster truck. Therefore, we must run them over.
rolled 57 = 57>>19703445I will offer a sheeps anus
rolled 34 = 34>>19703445Disregard the authorities, acquire cosplay girlfriend.
rolled 65 = 65RAMMING SPEED!!!
>>19703455So, what, Susan and Hayate don't even get woken up by the revving engine?
rolled 19 = 19Hmm then how do the gods feel about the blood of a virgin girl?
>>19703455All hail Derm! It is his will that we succeed in this endeavour.
rolled 36 = 36>>19703495I'd say very little
rolled 77 = 77>>19703506Indeed
rolled 97 = 97>>19703495What about the blood of a virgin boy.
rolled 54 = 54>>19703527Wow the dicegods love young boys and goat anal virginity
>>19703527Well at least that will be easy to find on /tg/, eh?
>>19703527So figured out who the dice gods actually are...
rolled 84 = 84>>19703545Maybe that's why they're here in the first place.
>>19703445The truck, with it's huge engine catches the other car's driver by surprise and accelerates quickly.But the police-cruiser was no joke either, after the initial surprise of seeing such a big vehicle tear ass down the empty street, the officer also begins to accelerate after you.The truck passes out of the suburbs into a wooded area, the pursuit still continuing.the road which was pretty straight at first, now begins to curve and wind through the trees.On either side, multiple trails lead deeper into the forest."Turn of the lights!" Lime tells Touma.He complies and begins to drive in darkness."When I tell you to, pull over!" She tells him as she looks back at the policecar pursuing them in the distance..They loose sight of it after a couple more curves, and when another logging trail comes up, Lime grabs the wheel and turns into it."Kill the engine!" she orders frantically as she looks to see if the policecar saw them turn.Touma shuts-off the engine, leaving the monster-truck dead in the woods.A couple of meters away, the policecar pass by them siren and light still blazing, chasing a truck that wasnt there."Nyahaha~! It worked!" She says as she high-fives the youth."That... was... intense!" Touma says as he leans back into his seat."Now what?" He asks her."I dunno." Lime begins to consult her map.[ ]get back on the road after waiting a bit.[ ]follow the logging trail[ ]wake up the two in the back
rolled 59 = 59[ ]wake up the two in the back[ ]get back on the road after waiting a bitAlso: I require horribly wreck police cars.
>>19703770Get back on the road after waiting a bit.Something so minor isn't something you need to concern the sleepers about, especially if they were tired enough to sleep through the chase.
>>19703770[x]get back on the road after waiting a bit.
[x] back to the road with you.
>>19703770[x]get back on the road after waiting a bit.It'd be nice if either of the two could see in the dark so we wouldn't have to turn the headlights back on.
rolled 44 = 44Welp, i'm out i got to get up early for jury duty tomorrow, while sick.I leave you gentleman with this nat 1
>>19703770[x] logging trainAdventure~
>>19703770[x]follow the logging trailAdventure! [x]wake up the two in the backYou must gather your party before venturing forth!
>>19703770Back to the road.
>>19703770Follow the trail, wake up the conveniently siblings.
>>19704024Yes, we can pump caffine into ourselves like everyone else.Were making decent time, well reach the goal in no time.
>>19704024Actually, naw, let 'em sleep.
>>19703770Logging trailOur car is built to eat that shit up
>>19704062But.. but the rednecks... they'll conduct experiments up in our anuses!
>>19703813I thought lime could
>get back on the road.Touma and Lime wait for about half an hour more, making sure no more cop cars pass-by, before getting back on the road.As Touma was about to switch the lights back on, Lime stops her."The lights are too much of a give-away." She says as her eyes glow green "Just follow what I say.""Okay." he does as he is told and pulls-back onto the road.and so, with Lime's nightvision, they continue to drive on.------------------------------------------------------------**ROLL FOR RESULT OF NIGHT DRIVING**1-20 Vehicular trouble21-40 another run-in with cops41-60 Lost61-80 Get to Missouri81-100 get to Kansas>taking the 7th roll
rolled 52 = 52>>19704205Is good day to be giant truck.
rolled 95 = 95>>19704205Wait, which one did we want to get?
rolled 82 = 82>>19704205rollan for awesome
rolled 85 = 85>>19704205uh oh
rolled 20 = 20>>19704205Woo
rolled 43 = 43>>19704205Oh, no.
rolled 95 = 95>>19704205Roringu roringu.
rolled 41 = 41BEHOLD!
rolled 7 = 7>>19704205Dice!
rolled 81 = 81>>19704205I am getting a worrying sensation in the back of my mind,I think it is the potato fuhrer doom that is imminent
rolled 38 = 38>>19704205Dem feet
rolled 84 = 84Comeon Kansas.I'll offer up a picture of a little boy if you favor us dicegods.
rolled 84 = 84>>19704257IS CREDIT TO TEAM.
>>19704257>95Looks like we're going to be in Kansas, little girl!
>>19704257Kansas it is.
>>19704257Watch out Toto, we Kansas now.
>>19704257Well shit toto we are in Kansas now
rolled 80 = 80>>19704239>>19704235>>19704222Whelp.
>>19704257Good job!
>>19704278>>19704282I totally did not see a Toto mind coming.
rolled 11 = 11>Insert many wizard of Oz references.
>>19704272>>19704257They knew...
>>19704257The rays of the morning sun woke you up from slumber, the girl in your arms also waking up at about the same time."Morning." You tell her in greeting."Mawneen. Where are we?" She asks."I have no idea." You say as you sit up and look around. The endless prairies surrounding you give you some clue of your current location, you must be somewhere in the heartlands.Missouri, maybe Kansas.You knock on the cabin's rear window and check in with the two there."So guys, where are we?" You asked them"Kansas. We crossed the state-line about an hour ago." Lime tells you."Did we pass any checkpoints yet?""One in Illinois, another In Missouri. We're coming up to another one in about an hour." Touma tells you."Cool. Let's switch driving duties there.""Roger that." The two tell you.You turn back to your twin and fill her in on the situation."Kansas huh? Hope a twister doesnt take us away to Oz." She says as she has her Device manifest a quick breakfast."Well, if it does, the first thing that will happen is we're gonna flatten a witch." you say with a chuckle."I don't think ruby slippers will look very good on you.""Oh, they might. I have very pretty ankles." You tell her as you hand a thermos of coffee into the truck's cabin.--------------------------------------------------------------------->Roll for checkpoint encounter>taking the 3rd roll
rolled 12 = 12>>19704489More dice?
rolled 72 = 72>>19704489I'm sure I'm too late for this.
rolled 45 = 45BEHOLD!
rolled 38 = 38>>19704489Dice go! We need to see our good pal Ichika for once. That or Erica, mad mad Erica.
>>19704489Suddenly, a supersonic fighter jet. Piloted by our Engel.
>>19704520The only time his roll isn't great is on an encounter... man Derm I am impressed.
>>19704520Not very beholding there.
rolled 63 = 63I have failed you.>Charges toward nearest cliff.
Please take your shity quest up satan's arsehole where it belongs with all the other cancer.
>>19704543See, that's why I, despite following this quest since the very first thread, have chosen to remain anonymous. My failed rolls don't reflect badly on me.
>>19704539As much as Erica is a fighter pilot, wouldn't she go for a F/A multi-role aircraft, since we're a ground target?Come to think of it, how is she able to pilot aircraft that are anywhere from 40 to 50 years ahead of what she's trained on?
>>19704562I stay like this because of the stupid shit I constantly say.
>>19704590Magic.
>>19704543At least you're not Lookout
>>19704553No.
>>19704590Because Bat-Magic and Science.
rolled 46 = 46At least I can rest in the knowledge that I prevented you from getting the 38.
>>19704590Isn't the strike witches "BC" actually "before Caesar"?So wouldn't their 50's be like our 90's or something?
>>19704642No.
>>19704520As you roll along towards the next checkpoint, Kraus interrupts your breakfast for a quick announcement."YOU BETTER LISTEN TO THIS, COCKFACE. I WAS SCANNING THE POLICE BANDS WHEN THIS CALL CAME THROUGH."He plays a recording for you."-All units be on the lookout for a blue monstertruck, decals on the side read -BIGFOOT-. No plates. This vehicle has been confirmed to have been involved in accidents and police chases in Pensylvania, Ohio and Indiana. Arrest at all costs.-'"This is bad. Very bad.""Well, something like this isnt very stealthy you know." Susan comments with a pat on the truck's roof."Do we switch cars?" Lime asks from inside.[ ]yep[ ]no
>>19704744[x]yep
>>19704744[x] yep
[x] YepIt'll get Erica off our tail too, maybe get a winabago.
>>19704744Yep.
All of my YEP!
>>19704744[x] yepLet's find something with a comfy back seat for Touma and Lime.Oh god that sounds so inappropriate.
rolled 14 = 14We should at least see what we have available first.
>>19704775You know, we don't need to get a single car. We could go for two.
rolled 19 = 19>>19704744>YepWe can throw Erica off our trail easier, as well.>>19704789We'll just have to see what comes along.
rolled 47 = 47Rolling for a black Fiat 500 Abarth and forging a set of license plates.
rolled 8 = 8Rolling for a 2009 Camaro in blue.
(x) YesGo to a used car dealership, pay cash, get two white sedans that have the biggest engines we can afford. save the recipts. We then dump the monster truck in a lake.
rolled 39 = 39>>19704976this please.
>>19704976Isn't he truck too tall to reasonably be covered up by a lake, short of air-dropping it into the middle of one?
>>19704744"Yep." You tell her. "Let's see what we can grab at the checkpoint."------------------------------------------------------------------Minutes later, you roll into the place designated on your map.It's a large bee farm in the middle of nowhere, named Bushy Mountain Farm.As you try and find a place to hide the truck, Lime and Touma go and get the cards punched in the farmhouse.**roll 1d5 for vehicle.**1 Winnebago2 old VW van3 Pair of motorcycles4 LG's choice5 Roller's choice>picking the 8th roll
rolled 3 = 3>>19705017A big green monster truck with LARGETOES on the side.
rolled 1 = 1>>19705017The Delorian
rolled 2 = 2>>19705017An Aston Martin
rolled 5 = 5Rollingu for a 2009 Blue Camaro.
rolled 5 = 5>>19705017Black '67 Chevy Impala with a cache of illegal guns hidden in the trunk.
rolled 75 = 75>>19705017Stretch Delorian
rolled 1 = 1>>19705049Derp. wrong die
rolled 2 = 2>>19705017A four-seater BMW.
rolled 5 = 5>>19705039Retry for this
rolled 4 = 4>>197050171960's batmobile, oh wait, that's a 2 seater only.The 60's batmobile and the 60's batcycle
rolled 4 = 4>>19705017Rerolling for the Impala.
rolled 3 = 3>>19705017ICE CREAM VANDING DING DING
rolled 2 = 2Meh.
rolled 4 = 4>>19705017rolling for this experimental light armored transport.
rolled 5 = 5A Silver Rolls-Royce 100EX
rolled 1 = 1>>19705017VW shaggin' wagon.
rolled 47 = 47>>19705057I hate you so much.
rolled 50 = 50>>19705057so close....
>>19705057*facepalm*
>>19705011That's why we have a temporary clone drive it into the lake.
>>19705057>ihnoaims_hate.jpg
>>19705074And why is that?
>>19705057I pray he considers the 1d100 roll... god damn this is dumb.Why am I laughing?
>>19705090Because out of all of the cool stuff we COULD have gotten, instead, we get something only superficially different than what we had.
>>19705086OH SHI-YOUR ROLL WAS INVLID WHICH MEANS MINE WAS!MY SIDES ARE JIGGLING ALL BY THEMSELVES!
>>19705090Because you wasted a perfect roll on a joke of a vehicle choice.
>>19705101Everything went according to plan.
HEY GUYSThis>>19705044Was 1d100.So instead.We get this.>>19705058LG's choice.
>>19705111Nevermind. There was another 1d100 in there that was just so low I thought it was a 1d5.So it's LG's choice, I think?
rolled 16 = 16Uh, everyone, I'd like to point out that >>19705044 rolled a d100, not a d5, which means that >>19705058 is the 8th legit roll.
Is that a trpile reverse troll then?
rolled 83 = 83Good show old chaps.
>>19705167.Completely intentional I assure you.
>lol wrong dice>>19705058You thing the barn, if it's doors could be opened wide enough, could hide the monster-truck, and so you drove it there.As Susan pulled the doors open, you find that you couldn't stick the truck in there.Why?Because something was already parked in it.Inside the barn was an old schoolbus.You estimate it to be from the 80's or the early 90's. It was relatively clean aside from a very light layer of dust, with no dings or rust visible on the body."Hey, I think we just found our new ride." Susan tells you as she goes up to the bus.You see her fumble around inside the thing, finding the keys in the bus' sun visor.It starts up with a nice low growl.She flashes the lights at you with a grin on her face and drives the bus out of the barn.You park the truck inside, take your stuff out and go up to her.She opens the door for you still with that grin on her face."This thing's great!" She says as she put's on the driver's hat."Not very stealthy though.""Eh. But it's not as bad as the truck." "Well there's that." You tell her as you dump your stuff in the nearest seat and go back for the air mattress.ANYTHING ELSE YOU WANT TO DO HERE?[ ]search the farm [ ]go on ahead[ ]other
>>19705342Search the farm, can't hurt.
>>19705342Lets search this here farm, we might find something cool.
>>19705342[x]search the farm [x]otherCheck the progress of the other teams.
>>19705342[x]search the farm Adventure!
[x]search the farmLet's find some awesome stuff.
>>19705342[x] search
>>19705342Just a quick search.
>>19705342Search the farm and remove some seats from the bus to make room for the mattress
>>19705498Exactly.
rolled 64 = 64In unrelated news, just found a tiny frog in my room.Tupperware+lid and he's outside again. Quite a surprise when a frog jumps out from behind your monitor.
Why bother searching the farm when we could just have Kraus scan the area and tell us about anything of interest?
>archived thread>oh hey, already at -3>"Get to the half-way point. Erica gets some heavy metal. Begin to question some of our decisions."So wait, why would we begin questioning some of our decisions?What does LG have in store for us?
The two of you decide to search the farm as Susan pulls-up to the farm-house.You get off and find Lime and Touma inside grabbing jars of honey from what should be this place's souvenir shop."Theres noone here?" You ask the two"Nope." Lime answers as she downs her first of many jars in a few gulps."Place is abandoned." Touma also answers. "The clock was in the kitchen. We hid it in the attic.""Good." Susan tells them as she takes some candles and soap."Find anything of value aside from all of this stuff?""Nope." The marionette answers."Well... There are those hives back there." Touma tells you as he points out a window.There, you see rows upon rows of wooden boxes that were usually employed by beekeepers for their swarms."They're still live?" Susan asks him."Looks like it. See? You can hear them buzzing all the way from here." he tells her."Interesting... Let's grab a couple of them.""Why?" You ask her.She grins at you, a shit-eating grin you thought only Erica could pull-off, and says:"BEEEEEEES."
>>19705629OH GOD WHY
>>19705540Not as surprising as a large, hand-sized spider jumping out at you from on top of your monitor.
>>19705629....wait, can Susan hat a hive of bees?
>>19705629Oh god why didn't I read the last threads description till now?
>>19705629>"BEEEEEEES""Have I mentioned that I love you yet?"
------------------------------------------------------The four of you get on the bus and unload your loot inside.A bee keeper's suit, jars and jars of honey, candles, soap, and three sealed hives.You also made room in the back for the mattress by unscrewing some of the seats and dumping them behind the house.Now suitably prepared, everyone takes a seat, with Susan behind the wheel, and you drive-off.**ROLL FOR GETTING TO COLORADO**> taking the highest of the first five.
rolled 23 = 23here we go!
rolled 89 = 89>>19705703
rolled 48 = 48>>19705703I'm disappointed that Susan hasn't attempted to hat a hive. But I suppose the logistics of getting a hat small enough to hat the queen is just beyond our reach.
rolled 47 = 47>>19705703Hug Dice.
rolled 35 = 35Yes.
rolled 44 = 44>>19705703The Buzzwagon stops for neither man nor insect.
rolled 66 = 66>>19705703Should we activate our swag radar? I mean we have time to check it out now.
rolled 96 = 96>>19705703Gentlemen
>>19705750Oh yeah, we should ask Kraus about that. And maybe see if Susan and Naru have something similar.
rolled 6 = 6>>19705830Susan has one too but neither functions when near to each other due to overwhelming swag rolling off both of them.
>>19705750>>19705943>>19705830We should ask Kraus what the range on that thing is. We could use it as an Early-Warning system against Erica showing up and ganking us.
>>19705994I thought the swag radar was part of the striker unit?
>>19706132plenty of space on the bus.
Oh man... what happened to LG?
>>19706245Might have been pulled into work. Or a meeting.
>>19705729You position yourself behind the dirver's seat as Susan hums something that sounds suspiciously like Pachelbel's Canon."So what do you plan to do with those?" You ask her with a nod towards the three hives that were placed near the middle of the bus."you don't plan on hatting them do you?""I wasnt.. But now that you gave me that idea, I just may try it." She tells you."well if you weren't gonna hat them, then what were you gonna do?"She turns to you, that maniacal grin on her face and again says, "BEEEEEEEEEEEES.""have I told you I love you yet?" You say with a chuckle.She says nothing and abruptly returns to driving.--------------------------------------------------------------------You drive across Kansas without much incident.Trying to find out how the other teams are doing, you ask Kraus if he can detect them in the vicinity."NOPE. I HAVE BEEN KEEPING TABS ON THE POLICE BAND THOUGH. A PINK CADILLAC WAS PULLED OVER IN MISSOURI, THE KIDS INSIDE IT TAKEN INTO PROTECTIVE CUSTODY.""That's Negi and Shi-no wait, Illya.""YEP. A JEEP HAS GOTTEN INTO A CHASE WITH ILLINOIS TROOPERS, DRIVER DESCRIBED AS HAVING PINK HAIR.""Hina. What about Erica?""A NATIONAL GUARD BASE HAS HAD REPORTS OF BEING BROKEN INTO IN OHIO. NO FURTHER INFORMATION AVAILABLE.""Dammit, that's where her chopper crashed. Let's hope she didn't steal a tank.""JUDGING THAT POTATO-FREAK, SHE'D STEAL AN ATOMIC SUB IF SHE COULD."
worst thread ever
this quest is made of dildos and i express my contempt with this sage
>>19706265>I can't believe how much fun they're having! I have to stop them, but how?>I know, I'll get mad at them!
>>19706263"That reminds me, how are you and Frau getting along. Any progress with Suiseiseki?""So, Kraus, what can you tell me about the Swag-Radar you mentioned?"
>>19706265I dunno, Twink Quest, TEOTWAWKI Quest, and Supervillian Quest died out pretty bad, and only one of those were remotely well written.
>>19706263I can just imagine Negi's relief at the end of that nightmareHina would just have destroyed the cop cars.Erica probably leveled half the base making off with whatever she stole
She continues to drive towards the next checkpoint somewhere in Colorado.The big yellow bus handling like how you'd expect a bus would.The speed on it isn't so great neither was the acceleration, but it's pretty spacey inside and quite comfortable.A few miles from the checkpoint, one that was marked as a "titty bar" on the map, and you hear the sound of sirens from behind you.In the distance, and catching up fast, was a squad of policecars.Sirens blaring and lights flashing, they're gaining on you fast.WAT DO?[ ]cheese it[ ]play it cool
>>19706360Honestly no matter what she stole we have a Landraider. She's toast.
>>19706400Chill. We blow them up if we have to, but if we can chill out and they're after someone else, then there's one less problem to worry about.
>>19706400Play it cool.Hide your hair with a hat.Make the other two hide on the floor.We're not sure these cops are after us
>>19706400[x]play it coolGive Susan the clone program, and if the cops stop us, make it look like we're a school field trip.
>>19706400[x]play it cool
>>19706400[x]play it coolProblem officer?(If they bring us a problem we can always blow the shit out of their car)
>>19706400Play it cool.Hide your hair with a hat. Make the other two hide on the floor.We're not sure these cops are after us
>>19706400Wait can Kraus make us a drivers license? If not cheese it
>>19706429>Give Susan the clone program, and if the cops stop us, make it look like we're a school field trip.You do realise we can barely pull off a single clone don't you?Play it cool.
>>19706400We be cool.
>>19706429That's actually a cool idea.And later on, if one of us needs to make a break for it, we can make Erica think she blew us both to hell and gone and still win.
"play it cool." you tell the girl at the wheel."I know." she answers as she pulls over to let the cars pass.The fleet of police-cruisers continue on without a second look at you, their destination unknown.With a sigh of relief, Susan gets back on the road and drives to the next checkpoint.-----------------------------------------------------------------At your destination, a strip club named "TUX", you find the dude sitting at the bar with the punchclock next to him."You made good time." he says as he takes a sip of milk."Our luck is still holding I guess." you answer as you punch your card and Susan's."I wonder... how long it will it last." he answers cryptically as you head out.You jump into the bus, trading places with Susan and drive-off.**ROLL FOR RANDOM ENCOUNTER**>taking the 5th roll
>>19706566Erica knows we have the clone program by now I think.Given we used it on her when we ran away from her and Gai at the start.Unless she thought Touma took the wheel of our wiener mobile
rolled 8 = 8>>19706600Some one's gotta start this thing.
rolled 64 = 64>>19706600>"I wonder... how long it will it last."Well, that's ominous. Since we're going through the Midwest, are we going to encounter a Neo-Nazi or White Supremacist group, just like the Blues Brothers did?
rolled 8 = 8>>19706602Yes, but she won't expect Susan to know it. A surprise trick is always a good thing to have.
rolled 96 = 96>>19706600Well we know he's chill now. Like Kimono chill.
>look up M1A2 Abrams top speed>35mph>On roadWHELPWe won't be seeing Erica again
rolled 30 = 30KKK clan meeting
rolled 41 = 41>>19706635I dont wanna be the next guy who rolls low.
rolled 64 = 64>>19706647Too late for that.
>>19706644Welp. On the plus side, we won't have to feel bad by running a school bus through their meeting and releasing an entire hive of pissed off bees.
>>19706640>maybe she'll take a M2 Bradley>41mph top speedI think she'll be stealing another helicopter
rolled 33 = 33>>19706675If not an actual plane.
rolled 38 = 38Hey Kraus, be a dear and hack the pentagon and search for reports of stolen property where we just saw my dearest Erica.
>HEY GUYS, LET'S EXPECT A TANK!>fastest tank in the world has a top speed of 51 MPH.Let's prepare for a gunship or something.>timestop, tealaser the wings off>lol all the way to the finish line
>>19706716Depends on what gunship she gets; she might try to ambush us with one, and modern gunships have very fast target acquisition, and we'd be screwed if she gets a lock and fires a couple Hellfires at us.
>>19706640>>19706675>>19706716Expecting LG to follow the laws of physics when you have a rage fueled potato fuhrer who may well have stuck jet engines onto whichever tank she stole.We are working on speed of plot here after all rememberHell she might have that flying land raider thing the spess mehreens got a while ack
>>19706736Time stopIf she launches hellfires we can pop them while we have them frozenWe should be more worried about her hanging out the side of a blackhawk firing Sasha at us
>>19706644A low dangerous buzzing sound is heard, like a million oversized bees in a can.But this wasnt from the bees you were carrying in the bus, no. This sounded distant, thundering.It's a plane. A large one if your ears are to be trusted.'FOUND YOUUUUUUUU!' Your errant grilfriend yells through your mindlink.'You can run, but you cannot hide!'Something huge passes above you.You look out the window to see a large military transport flying dangerously low."FUUUUUUUCK! How did she find us?!" Touma screams from the back of the bus."I have no fucking idea." you answer as you watch the plane's rear cargo door open.
>>19706857Quick, pour rebounder on the spot of the road the tank is going to land on.
>>19706857She stole a carrier... and a tank...Gentlemen, we summon Kraus and our Landraider.
>>19706857>you watch the plane's rear cargo door open.Wait a minute...she's not seriously going to...?Oh fuck, she IS going to airdrop a tank, isn't she?
rolled 95 = 95>>19706857And you all thought a tank wouldn't work.
rolled 14 = 14Stick your finger as deep into your urethra as it will go, and wiggle it
>>19706857Timestop, lealaser one wing off, resume.Giggle.
>>19706857I guess it is safe to say she ignored the stops.Or she said screw subtlety and dropped down in her strikers to punch her card
>>19706857"Is that...""yep, it's a tank." you tell Susan before she can finish her question.The door lowers with the plane still flying low over the road.You see Erica jump into the tank's open hatch, and drive it out of the cargo hold.'HAHAHAHAHA! Let's see you try and shoot this with a pistol!' She taunts you as the turret swivels towards your bus.Behind her, the plane, possibly piloted by Gai, pulls up and heads towards the distant hills.
rolled 92 = 92>>19706897If she knocks us out, she can go back and clock in at her leisure. If we're out, so long as she finishes, she'd win.
>>19706908Rebounder inside the barrel?
>>19706908This is why we need a bolter!
>>19706908I think this calls for a rebounder tray right over the barrel and giant piles of molotov on the tracks. Use time stop to get it done.
Negi sits in the holding room of of some precinct in Missouri.He's been given a box of cookies and a juicebox as the police try and find out where his "parents" were.Illya sits beside him with a now empty box of cookies and looks at his longingly."errr... Want some?" he asks the whitehaired girl."YES!" she answers as she snatches the box away.'atleast I'm not in that death trap anymore.' Negi thinks in relief.Seconds later, after Illya devoured the second box of cookies, she turns to Negi."Hey... I'm hungry.""You are?" he asks her incrdulously"Ahuh.... I know! let's go find Hayate-oniichan! He always have some yummy things to eat!"The white haired girl grabs his hand and manages to pull him out of the room without any of the adults noticing.As she pushed him into an empty SWAT truck, Negi could only pray to whatever deity was watching over him.
>>19706908How about Molotov down the barrel? Make it explode on the shell which hopefully will cause the shell to go off and maybe screw the turret up
>>19706983Our salvation!
>>19706984Think about what a cannon is designed to do for a minute there, and try to figure out why that probably won't work.Go ahead, I'll wait.
Guys... GUYS!Hear me out here..This is a crazy idea, but it just might work.What we do is go invisible. Climb the tank. Open the hatch.AND UNLOAD ALL THREE HIVES OF BEES.And then we close the turret back up and weld it shut with a tealaser.
>>19707020I LOVE IT."BEEEEEEEEEEEEEEES!"
>>19707020BEEEEEEEEES?BEEEEEEEEES.
>>19707020Could be dece.
>>19707032>Could be BEEEEEEEESFTFM
>>19707020That's just cruel>>19707007Contain the explosive force of a shell firing not one exploding right inside it which is greater than the charge used to fire.Anyway it doesn't need to peel it back like some bad cartoon all it needs to do is fuck with the loader or firing mechanism to stop her using it on us
>>19707020I dunno. That seems really mean-spirited and crosses the line from a practical joke to dumping pig's blood on someone.Besides, I want to save the bee's for some KKK meetings. And for Susan to try to hat one.
>>19707020BEEEEEES!http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_XcT49ms4yg
>>19707057And dropping a tank on us is "fair?"
Hina drives her jeep Amazoness in the passenger seat.Behind them, dozens of policecars are still trying to catch up even after crossing three states."Ahhh.. Why won't they leave us alone!" she shouts in frustration."I think they would have if you didnt cut though their roadblock." Her partner sagely tells her."I told them I'm sorry didn't I?""They seem to not have taken your apology very well."
>>19707079No that's our psycho girlfriend who wants us to dress up like a slutty maid.We just NOPE our way out of things
Hey guys, I just remembered something. Didn't Susan find a cog to the caseopeia back in the gym? What ever happened with that?
>>19707093Either she still has it, or she lost/tossed it. I doubt she just threw it away, though.
>>19707093It hasn't come up yet but our watch probably needs some fixing
sage of contemptEvery single one of you...cut your fingers off in shame. SHAME for posting in here.
>>19707129Ah, you're funny. Have you actually followed it at all, or are you just acting on the hype?
>>19707129If you cut off your penis, hands and head for being such a bitch then sure
>What happened to it? Roll badly and you'll find outThis is worrying
>>19707134It's summer acting up.
All that you do is masturbate to lolis and take up space that should be reserved for Traditional Gamestl;dr : GET OFF THE FRONT PAGE
>>19707159Oh, I'm aware that's what it probably is. Which would make it the latter of the two.
>>19707161Hahahahahaha nope.Look past the front page of use catalog.neet.tv/tg/ because we don't give a fuck about your argument
rolled 1 = 1rollin'u to see what happened to the cog u gais
>>19707161>All that you do is masturbate to lolis We do nothing of the sort.Also, no. It's been driven into the ground that quests are /tg/ material, and are a sort of traditional game, at that.Playing pretend, one of the most traditional games there is.
Illya, the little girl that was also Shirou, surprisingly manages to reach the pedals in the large van.She pulls out of the police parking-lot and out onto the open road with still no one noticing her.Negi has his seatbelt on and is currently wearing a helmet he got form the back."Can't we jsut stop?" he asks her."NO! I want to go to Hayate-oniichan!" she tells him angrily."Eyes on the road please!" he begs the girl."oooh... This thing has TV!" She says as her attention is taken by the van's dispatch computer.She fiddles with it for a few minutes, blindly steering through traffic and somehow manages to get to an internet video site.What she played next will be stuck in Negi's mind forever."I wub yooo. Yu wub mi. We're a happi famiri. With a great big hug and a kiss from me to yoo. won;t you say yu wub me too?"Illya procedes to sing-along to the purple dinosaur on screen.She continues to do so for the next half hour without any intention of stopping."Someone Please save me...."Negi pleads into the the helmet's mic.
>>19707187That... That poor bastard.
>>19707187Poor, poor Negi. With all of the misfortune that has been dropping on him, hopefully he gets something good happen.
NEXT TIME ON MSQ:Battle City New thread at 2200 4chan time:>Shirou quest tonight at 0700
>>19707187We need to help him.We should make a potion to erase the last day from his memory.Testing that would be hard though since we wouldn't know how to make it or if it worked properly
>>19707225So... lots and lots of booze, then.
>>19707225Drink lots of booze, forget what happened, use it as the basis for the potion?
>>19707274>>19707250That is the basic idea,The ingredients would be the highest proof alcohols imaginable and the memory would be waking up in a ditch with no recollection of the previous 24 hoursAnd then when we test it we lose use of the potion since we just forgot everything we did to make it
>>19707274Something like that
>>19707284Dont be silly, anon. That's what notes are for.I also suspect the Bureau wouldfrown on us experimenting on a memory suppressant on our own.
>>19707336That's trueBut it is for a good cause
>>19707161>All that you do is masturbate to lolis Excuse me, I think you'll find we spend more time masturbating to traps thank you very much.
>>19708507This cancerEVERY DAY
inb4 404
>>19709692Inb4 more quest faggotry
>>19709720Why don't you sage next time if you're going to be a huge bitch face faggot?Did you forget because of the giant cock in your mouth? Or was it the cock in your ass?inb4 sage faggotry
>>19709766Now, now, there really isn't a need for such anger. It's not his fault he's retarded.Or, it is possible he noko saged, but I have my doubts
>>19710039There is every reason to be mad. Make believe was around before make believe with toys or make believe with cards, which means that these quests are more traditional than the warhammer or mtg threads. I guess it makes sense though that most people the like to ply make believe with toys or cards are asspies, or at least it seems that way irl. I really hate the NO FUN ALLOWED and STOP LIKING THINGS I DON'T LIKE retards.
>>19710171I'm not saying don't be mad, just that it doesn't help. I don't care for 'em, either.
>>19710947I guess I'll just have to troll the other threads about contemporary games and start threads about how freeform imaginative games have been around for basically forever, while card games and toy games haven't even been around for half a century. Not including gambling card games, which don't ever get threads on here. Moot really need to make a contemporary tabletop games forum and allow the quests to have their rightful place as Traditional games.Also everybody here needs to research gaming beyond the last 40 years. the last 40 years is ll contemporary shit. it takes longer than 40 years to be Traditional.>old-time rsetsquI know, Captcha, I know.
