>>24931176
"Remember when I said I had experienced what talking to me was like?

It's souichiro-sensei being like that again."

>>24931176
Facepalm

>>24931176
Goddamnit Souichiro.

Tell Saber the tale of sleeping beauty, and that how despite knowing both that and it being how he was revived from his magically-induced coma, he's still dense enough not to realise that Caster is completely, absolutely in love with him.

Threadly reminder that the updated Ebook can be found at http://pastebin.com/kbGzcbDb

And Dammit Souichibro, are you trying to steal the spot of 2nd densest material known to man from us?

>>24931176
>"Do you have any idea what that was about?"

"... Just something I asked sensei to clear up with Caster. Though this wasn't how I imagined it would go."

And this >>24931291

Later, ask Caster about regaining Shirou's contract with Saber

A reminder.

>Grail needs 7 Servants in it to appear
>There are three extra Servants are here - False Assassin, Gilgamesh and Avenger.
>So we can have three Servants when the Grail appears.
>Archer and Lancer kill each other. If Lancer survives then everyone else gangs up on him, thus granting his wish of an awesome fight.
>If Archer survives he kills himself because he honestly has no reason to be here anymore, since we're not him. Apologize for not being able to help him.
>Only survivors now are Caster, Seiba and Rider
>All three either contract with Caster or Bazett, who is probably the only Master with an actual wish
>???
>EVERYONE IS WINNAR

We need to share this plan with everybody to prevent people like Zouken from ripping our alliance apart. Enforcing the idea that everyone will get what they want as long as they stick together will basically make our team almost unbreakable.

>>24931176
Find Castah. Tell her to be more assertive with Souichirou. And by 'more assertive' I mean 'you're basically going to have to rape him before he figures it out'.
>>24931390
>EVERYONE IS WINNAR
Except THE WHOLE FUCKING WORLD IS DEAD. Grail is fucked. Nobody is getting a wish.

>>24931426
We'll deal with that when it comes to it - I'd hope that Caster isn't dumb enough to not notice that its a murder machine. Until then, any doubts that we might not be right about the Grail being fucked could cause Caster or Bazett to turn on us - better to guarantee that they'll get what they want if they stick with us and we're wrong then have them think they can stab us in the back and get their wish.

Its really more of a 'cement the alliance' thing than anything else, honestly.

>>24931390

Problems worth noting:

1:The grail is evil, so fulfilling it would be bad.
2: This plan kills the Ilya.
3: Bazett's wish probably involves staying with Lancer.
4: Saber is convinced she can't stay. This might just be Saybah bein' Saybah but we need to confirm.
5: All of these points have been posted before, stop reposting your already shot-down plan, or at least PRETEND you've revised it.

>>24931176
Unfortunately for Team Slightly Less Dense, the original iteration of the Sleeping Beauty tale only stipulates that the princess was to be awakened by a king's son (i.e. the fact that the person doing the awakening was of royal blood WAS, in fact, the trigger to break the curse, so Souichirou could technically be correct.)

We can inform him, however, that he wasn't awakened simply by her presence; it took until she kissed him, so the curse he was inflicted with was obviously not the "broken by royalty" variety, but the "broken by love" variety.

>>24931318
Look at Caster, now over to me, now back to Caster. Your Master is now Diamonds!

>>24931176
"Souichirou seems to be stealing my thunder again. I never thought I'd see the day when someone could miss the point of "Sleeping Beauty", but by god he pulled it off. At this rate I'll lose my rep as the dense guy."

>>24931390
>>24931426
>>24931463
I kind of wished I finished that second insane pastebin by now. One of the theories was that Avenger was making a new, curse-free grail.

"... Please tell me you're joking."

"If I were, I daresay I'd know the punchline." Saber answers with a frown.

"Have you ever heard the "Sleeping Beauty' story?"

"I believe I heard Rider asking Sakura about it. Something about a curse on a girl that needed a prince to break it?"

"In some versions of the story, it was love." I sigh. "But yeah, a kiss woke her up. Avenger apparently used that on Souichirou to put him to sleep knowing Caster wasn't likely to figure it out on her own."

"I see. So WAS it the fact that she was a Princess?"

"It could have been, but the fact remains that she is obviously deeply and truly in love with the man. So it could be either."

"So why are you acting upset?" Saber asks, concerned. "Is the possibility-"

"I tried to tell Souichirou that Caster loved him, and he's clearly taking this as proof that she doesn't." I frown. "I don't know why that infuriates me so much."

"Shirou, I hate to sound uncourteous but...." She hesitates, looking down. ".... Doesn't this make you sound like a hypocrite?"

"I can't do anything because the entire peace might implode violently if I'm not careful. He's not doing anything because he's willfully ignoring the blatantly obvious. His situation isn't complicated, he's just flat ignoring it." I frown. "not that you don't have something of a point. I probably SHOULD have said or done something before it got complicated."

"Always comes back to mistakes of the past." Saber comments.

"No use dwelling on what can't be changed." I note conversationally.

We sit there in silence for a long minute, only occasionally breaking it with Bedivere's quiet and insistent demands of attention.

>Actions?

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>>24931664

>>24931718
>Bedivere's quiet and insistent demands of attention
That must take her back

>>24931724
Oh god, please don't have another panic attack!

>>24931771

>Nah, I'm fine. I know I have shit luck, but assume I'm fine unless somebody actually says otherwise.

>.... Somebody TRUSTWORTHY, not just random channer babble.

>>24931771
You *need* to finish that pastebin now.

>>24931718
Time to have a chat with Caster.

We need to sort out the particulars of switching Saber's contract back over to us tonight, and have a little chat regarding Souichirou and his crippling inability to understand emotions.

>>24931808
This, but let's not bug Souichiro about the romance just yet. Brick walls are more constructive to talk to.

Let' just maybe drop a hint to caster while talking about Sabre's contract.

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>>24931786
dat uncanny likeness

>>24931718

Well, we might need to bring Caster up to speed regarding Zouken and True Assassin on steroids, besides bringing up Saber's contract.

Don't mention any possible moles in the alliance being coerced by Zouken yet.

>[ ] Talk to Caster.

>>24931787
I was planning on working on it in between AC-Guy's posts.
Minus editing and removing half the comments about Shirou's allergy, I'm about 84% of the way done.

>>24931910

>[remove the allergy jokes]

>But.... why? They never get old.

>Just like Pretty much his entire family, now that I stop to think about it.

>>24931977
Oh, zinger.

>>24931977
Because I made so many it feels they are actually getting old.
If you like I can make a beating a dead horse edition and leave them in another pastebin.

I go to find Caster, and find Souichiro waiting by her room. "Shirou."

"Sensei." I pause. "Is Caster around?"

"Not at the moment." He responds with the same casual seriousness he always has. "She said she had a few more wards to set before she would be ready to move, but she should be back any minute."

"I see. Mind if I wait here so I don't miss her coming and going?"

"It's fine." He says, and we stand there in silence for a few minutes before he turns to me. "You were wrong, by the way."

>Actions?

Any other suggestions, or are we just hanging out until Caster pops by next?

we gots a lil sidetracked there

>>24932109
hurr

>>24932100

"One does not preclude the other."

Then pull out our DVD copy of the Princess Bride and tell him he clearly needs it more than us.

Deflect all questions as to why we were just packing it around.

>>24932100
Really now? It seems you're going to lengths to find any answer except the obvious one

>>24932122

Make it happen. "It's childhood standard issue. You not having one explains a lot."

>>24932122
Oh god this.

>>24932100
>"You were wrong, by the way."

"About what?"

Two can play this "who is denser" game

>>24932100
"Sensei. Did you really come to that conclusion after investigating it int eh most unscientific way possible? You phrased the entire inquiry so as to unilaterally support a preconceived hypothesis - that being Caster's Princessdom being the qualifier for lifting your coma, and not the possibility of, y'know, True Love.

This might seem blunt, but I honestly get the impression you're doing everything humanly possible to avoid the conclusion that she loves you."

>>24932172
And if he asks how we know, just mention there's at least three people in the house with supernaturally good hearing, and the walls are annoyingly thin.

>>24932172

SCIENCE!

It gets you Mythologically good Greek Pussy.

>>24932100
"Oh? The way I hear it, you only asked her about the Princess part and completely avoided the Love part. Just because she happens to be a princess does not mean that was the relevant factor in curing you, nor does it preclude her having feelings for you."

>>24932608

>Oh holy shit, I proofread that. How did it get that mangled?

>>24932608
>[X] Ask about Saber's contract.
Addendum with new info about Zouken and Assasin.

"Really now? About what?"

"About your theory with Caster."

"Huh. Here I was thinking phrasing the question in a way that excludes the other possibility would be considered biased and unscientific."

"Why are you so stuck on this idea?" He asks, turning to me.

"Because you're denying it exists. Saying you don't feel the same way would be completely different, you're just saying she feels different than EVERYONE BUT YOU seems to acknowledge. If anything, it seems like you're going out of your way to not even allow for the possibility. Even if the 'Princess' part is what did it, that doesn't preclude the other possibility."

Souichiro stares at me for several seconds before looking away. "Alright then. She apparently denies it with you, and me just asking might warp her answer-" I slap my hand right to my face reflexively. "-Is there a way of finding out that-"

"Take this. clearly you need it more than me." I tell him, handing him my Secret Weapon.

"... A movie?"

"THE movie. Watch it with her, see how you feel about this situation afterwards."

He looks at the case. ".... 'The Princess Bride'. I don't even know what this is about and it feels like you're trying to tell me something."

"Imagine that."

"Where did you even get this from? Were you just carrying it with-"

"It's childhood standard issue. The fact that you've apparently never seen it says a lot."

"So your grand plan to see if Caster has feelings towards me.... is to get us to watch a children's movie together?" He frowns slightly. "That doesn't strike you as odd?"

"No, but that's because I've already seen it." He stares blankly at me. "Don't look at me like that, my plans are fool proof."

There's a slight noise from inside the room, followed byt Caster's voice calling for her Master. He goes in, and a few moments later, she steps out.

"You wished to speak with me?"

[ ] Ask about Saber's contract.
[ ] Ask how her work is going.
[ ] Ask how she is.
[ ] Ask WHY THEY ARE SO DENSE, FOR CHRIST'S SAKE.

>Sorry about that, but it was setting of my OCD so hard I had to fix that.

>>24932685
update on Zouken/Assassin

>>24932692
>byt
You still missed that bit

>>24932685
see:
>>24932659

>>24932767

>brb, sudoku.

>>24932685
>[ ] Ask about Saber's contract.

It's what we're here for.
Plus update her on the Zouken and Assassin front.

>>24932685
[x] Ask WHY THEY ARE SO DENSE, FOR CHRIST'S SAKE
WHYYYYYYYYYY

>>24932685
Update her on the Zouken/Hassan front, Ask about seibahs contract, then finish it up with asking why they are so goddamn dense.

>>24931471
Seibah just needs more affection points and to understand Archer's Great Mid-Life Crisis.

>>24932084
Please do!

>Update right after I cook dinner.

>>24932685
Ask rgarding Saber, Zouken, Assasssin

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I just worry constantly telling them that they're in love might have adverse effects. Nudges are one thing,
<- is another

>>24933175
Yeah, I'm kinda opposed to "STOP BEING DENSE" constantly being part of our conversations with them.

A bit of prodding is fine, but we don't need to be screaming it in their faces. At least not more than once per thread.

>>24933243
>>24933175

So, wait for the movie to take effect and then see what happens?

>>24933270
I wanna see how THAT plays out.

Chilling at the crib.
"Caster I have something. Shirou practically demanded we watch it together"
Oh?
...
"Mana time big boy!"
and Archer watches from half the city away

I never did watch the princess bride as a kid.

What did i miss?

>>24933378

True Love.

>>24932084
I'm new here, I don't know the jokes. Allergic Edition please!

>>24931906
>Don't mention any possible moles in the alliance being coerced by Zouken yet.
That's what I call Zouken's Successful Distrust-Seeding.
Dishonesty will break the alliance.

>>24933270
>So, wait for the movie to take effect and then see what happens?
Yeah, why not?

>>24933378
>What did i miss?
Fencing. Fighting. Torture. Poison. True love. Hate. Revenge. Giants. Hunters. Bad men. Good men. Beautifulest ladies. Snakes. Spiders. Beasts of all natures and descriptions. Pain. Death. Brave men. Coward men. Strongest men. Chases. Escapes. Lies. Truths. Passion. Miracles.

>>24933399
Would you like the link to the pastebin, or should I just post the relevant parts of it?

>>24933423
Whatever requires less effort from you (in case both are the same, let's start thinking early about not driving the thread into autosage and make it a pastebin).

It was originally from a pastebin of my insane theories on what was going on in the quest, and a joke I made a few times was accepted into Carnival-Phantasm Cannon

I'll just toss you the link that includes AC-Guy's commentary on it: http://pastebin.com/BwhREMG6

>>24932685
>[X ] Ask about Saber's contract.

Should we clue him in on the Clone Mystery Adventure? A Magic Expert might be privy to a few tricks. At the very least, we figured out why Shirou could't contract properly -mebbe she could fix us up proper-like again.

Also, dd we figure out who snuck into our house after the clone got ganked?

>>24933551
It was probably Archer. We should call Issei to confirm.

>>24933551
>Also, dd we figure out who snuck into our house after the clone got ganked?

Probably Archer, based on the whole "Burnt metal smell".

>>24933577
We sent him a text saying we're not dead, and that we'd explain later.

...We should *probably* follow up on that soonish.

>>24933399
>Dishonesty will break the alliance.
Then Caster will just be paranoid about that info and may take drastic action based solely on suspicion.
Unless she is actually the mole, in which case she'll probably inform Zouken that we're on to him, then he'll just change plans.

At the moment, only Ilya knows about the existence of a mole. Not even Lancer and Bazett are informed about it yet, even if they're in the alliance, because it's plausible Zouken will have something over their heads to coerce them with. It's just more likely that Zouken may have something more on Caster than Team Irish.
Of course, the general consensus on the who the suspect is seemed to be decided already (Sakura). But we cannot discount other possibilities.

>HOW DID I FUCK UP BRATWURST?!

>Anyway, can I get a quick consensus as I start my healthy and apparently vegetarian pasta?

>>24933551
>A Magic Expert might be privy to a few tricks. At the very least, we figured out why Shirou could't contract properly -mebbe she could fix us up proper-like again.
Yeah, and we didn't even ask Ilya to scan our body once again. So we have no real idea if we're the known "weird portal in there" body or something else.

>>24933688
Not enough curry?

>[ ] Ask how her work is going.

>>24933688
[x] Contract

>>24933688
Sabre contract, then infodump Zouken and Assassin shenanigans.

>>24933688
Majority vote for "Update her on Zouken/Assassin" (which wasn't in the choices), and a couple of "Ask about Saber's contract."

>>24932122
>Princess Bride

Can someone explain to me why /tg/ keeps pulling out the Princess Bride in Nasu based quests? At this rate someone should do a Princess Bride Nasuverse Quest.

>>24933752
>and a couple of "Ask about Saber's contract."
I'm against it. It's rude at best - suggests we don't like the Geass we made and are waiting for it to end.

>inb4 Soichiro screams: you ask about Saber so much because you're in love with her! Stop being so dense about it!

>>24933779
Because princess bride is awesome, and as a running gag it never stops being funny.

Imagine getting Inigo Montoya as a servant. "HALLO, MY NAME IS INIGO MONTOYA, I WILL BE BRINGING MY FATHER BACK TO LIFE WITH THE GRAIL, PREPARE TO DIE!"

>>24933779
It's more that it's a glorious affirmation of True Love conquers all; so it's basically a Giant "Fuck this shit" to the typical depressing oh god what the fuck Nasuverse bullshit.

/tg/ are huge suckers for True Love and Happy Endings, no matter how edgy we try to be sometimes.

>>24933798
What else should we ask,then? Are we trying to cultivate their romance further? If so, how?

>>24933824
We just gave up our precious copy of princess bride to get them hitched. That was our saber/Sakura Macguffin. ;_;

>>24933824
Just tell her he's dense. She needs to get assertive.

>>24933779
Buttercup summons the man in black as Saber. During the battle with the last remaining other servant she gives him an order with a command seal and he says "As you wish."

"A couple of quick things." I say. "First, I wanted to check on how you were doing, and how long it would take to get Saber back."

"Barring something drastic happening, I should be ready soon. I believe I'll be able to hand her over to either you or a person of your choosing by dinner." She answers confidently. Apparently she's thought about it too.

"Alright. something you should be aware of: I was apparently kidnapped and replaced by one of Assassin's doppelgangers or whatever he does. We've already fixed that particular problem and we're taking measures against it, but you should be aware."

".... I see. What countermeasures are you taking?"

"I'm gonna not be specific." She frowns. "No really, I'd recommend you having a way to tell if people around you are the real 'them'. I also wouldn't recommend it be a trivia thing, since I was technically the one controlling the clone."

She nods. "Useful information indeed. From what I've learned, the two biggest threats to a Caster class are an Assassin and a Saber for their high magic resist." She smiles. "Thank you, Shirou."

"There's more: Kirei's apparently dead, and it looks like Zouken and Assassin killed them."

"... Kill the Observer? Why?"

"Because either he knows something or thought he did." I frown "The alternative is that he didn't want someone getting warned, but that implies he's planning something big enough to make the church want to shut the war down."

"... That is worrying." She says, biting her lip. "Anything else?"

>?

>>24932685
We really need to say something to caster + souichibro about how "Since the invention of the kiss there were 6 kisses that were known as the most passionate, the most pure. Yours between caster knocked that 6th one back into the stone age"

>>24933816
To be fair, both Fate's UBW Good, and Tsukihime's Ciel True endings are essentially "true love conquers all" endings. I mean in one, Rin figures out a way to say "fuck this shit" so Saber could stay, and in the other Roa is defeated and Ciel and Shiki get to be happy together.
Not exactly depressing oh god what the fuck. They had a hard time GETTING there, but they still got to be happy.

>>24933873

Arc's Good ending was also pretty damn straightforward and happy, as was the good end for Ciel.

Shit, I'm willing to say that despite the darkness in the series, most Nasuverse stuff is like this. There's always a SHOT at a good/happy ending if nothing else.

>>24933851
"I'm sorry, this may be a little tough for you. But it's time. It's time to push Souichirou down tonight after watching the movie I gave him and make your feelings clear. Neither of you will get anywhere at this rate."

>>24933899
Thing is, even in the "happy" ends, there is still a ton of messed up shit behind the scenes that goes completely unresolved.

Akiha still has to deal with slow creeping insanity, Kohaku is still full-yan-no-dere bonkers, and poor Hisui is still trapped in the middle of it all.

>>24933899
>good end for Ciel.

Urgh. That may have been a happy end but it was so stupid too.

>>24933934
Don't forget about Sakura.

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>>24933949
Ah, yes. In the Fate "happy" end Sakura gets to spend the rest of her days with her loving grandpa Zouken, because that entire bit of plot doesn't even show up in that route.

And you can't save Ilya

Tsukihime's AC-Guy route was and still is completely bonkers and full of what.

>>24933962
Does anyone have the gif of that scene where the thumbnail is Ilya yelling at Kerry.

I want to post it in that Harry Potter quest.

>>24933899
>Arc's Good ending was also pretty damn straightforward and happy, as was the good end for Ciel.
Well yeah, those were just the two off the top of my head. And I honestly liked Ciel's True End more, but that's because I'm an unrepentant Cielfag and the ambiguous nature of the setup in the Good End just kinda made me feel bad, whereas the True End had them very clearly together.
>Shit, I'm willing to say that despite the darkness in the series, most Nasuverse stuff is like this. There's always a SHOT at a good/happy ending if nothing else.
Except Fate/Zero, but that HAD to all end in tears due to it being the background for Fate/Stay Night. It's like expecting a prequel to Hamlet to end any way other than Hamlet's dad dying.
>>24933934
Nature of the medium. Either only certain things even appear in certain routes, or every route is basically the same with slightly different scenes depending on which girl's route you're on.

>>24933908
No! Don't push it that much. Wait for the magic power of the movie.

>>24933851
>"Anything else?"
I think that we didn't really clear how the simulacrum worked, with fake body and mind. Oh, and something like "Rulebraker could probably snap the mind out of fake body, but it can be dangerous. I was lucky to escape Zouken, but next time we should find and rescue original body before releasing spirit out of simulacrum.

>>24933984

I'm going to go on record and say that whatever the fuck Shiki got up to isn't nearly as bad as what we've already done, much less what we're probably going to END UP DOING.

>>24934006
Just had an idea. In our most dire time of need, what if we project the iron throne in an effort to summon Shiki?

>>24933899
Kohaku's ending is also pretty bloody happy.

>>24934061
Of course it was. In fact, it was the same kind of cathartic feeling of the girl who had it worst getting a happy, normal life that was in the True End of Heaven's Feel.

>>24933851
Nah, I think we're good.

TMESKIP TO DINNER

>>24934120
Timeskip? but every chance to snark is precious

>>24934148
Every snark is sacred
Every snark is great
If a snark is wasted
God gets quite irate

Every snark is wanted
Every snark is good
Every snark is needed
In your neighborhood

Every snark is useful
Every snark is fine
God needs everybody's
Mine and mine and mine

>>24934120
Every lost chance for +affection is a nother member dead by the end. DEAD I TELL YOU!

>>24933859
>>24933908
>>24934001
>>24934120
>>24934148
I don't think we've reached consensus. Vote, guys!

>>24934250
Isn't Timeskip winning?

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>>24934174

>>24934253

>Not by my count.

>>24934268
I'm in favor of tossing "Perfect kiss" line in after caster and souichiro watch the movie (it's a reference to the movie)

>>24934253
1 vote
>winning

Urg, how about "I gave Souichirou something for you two to watch tonight. It may seem hokey, but give it a try. I think you'll like it"

Runes, folks. Don't forget the runes.

>>24934274
What's after movie will be after movie. The question is what we're doing now.

Aside from this>>24934001 I can also suggest full-body-scan from Ilya. We're wild guessing the point at which we body-swapped with Assassin and we didn't even try to get all easy reachable knowledge.

Oh, forgot!
>>24933540
>I'll just toss you the link
Thank you!

>>24934315
Seconding this, if nothing else. We might need a second opinion from a mage of a different perspective.

I don't want to be too pushy on other people's romance, hence the hesitation on how to proceed next.

>>24934323
Yes, bodyscan. If nothing else it'll tell us if the door was connected to our real body or if it was something completely different that we still don't have a clue about.

>>24934323
Random new thought.
>From what I've learned, the two biggest threats to a Caster class are an Assassin and a Saber
I'd try to suggest her that she's lucky to be in an alliance with Saber AND a bunch of other servants against a LONE Assassin (I'm unable to make it sound casual and light, but I think Shirou could).

"The runes changed, like they're fading."

".... That might not be good." She responds.

"How so?"

"There's many things a sigil like that might be used for. It could be mapping, it could be transport, or if could be used to funnel energy. Those are just a few things off the top."

"I see. Wait, energy?"

"If that's the case, it would explain why they're fading. It needs less and less as time goes on, so it's designed to naturally diminish over time." She frowns. "Quite elegant, if that's the case. No cleanup afterwards at all. But then, that would imply he needs a certain amount of energy for something, and judging by what we've seen it would have to be big."

".... Like what?"

"Honestly, I have no idea." She shrugs. "The Grail seems like the obvious answer, but what we've seen wouldn't be half the energy servants provide on the whole. That's assming that 'energy collection' is the proper answer. They don't look entirely unlike Command seals, it's possible they're used as transport or a heavy magical burst as needed. Or it could be any number of combinations. They don't all have to serv e the same purpose."

"... so we've got nothing."

"No, we know that whatever it is they're fading. Which means either he needs to replinish them, or he has no need of them. So we know that the current situation is on a time-limit, the question is whether we should be acting against him, or preparing for him to act against us."

".... Huh. That was.... rather informative actually." I tell her, to which she smiles and returns to her room. Through the door I hear her asking Souichiro what the point of a movie is.

>Actions?

>>24934509
Who needs Shirou time next?
Rider and Ilya might need some post-flopping-corpse comforting
Sakura needs...everything
We've maxed Rin, but that's no reason to ignore her
Taiga? Does she know Ilya is Kerry's kid
Meeting Ayako for half a sec on the street seems suspicious some how

>>24934509

Listen in to Souchirou's reply.

Do the inevitable facepalm loudly and audibly.

Then go find Sakura, if she has finished talking with Rider.

>>24934554
Just something to throw out there, Saber's approached us three times wanting to ask about a dream, probably one of our memories about the fire 10 years ago. not saying we need to do this right this second, but we might want to talk to her about it at some point.

>>24934509
>>Actions?
Ilya = tomograph

>>24934509

Oh damn, totally forgot about this >>24934562
Might wanna clear this up with Saber before contracting back to her.

>>24934509
Tell Rin we fucked up with Sakura.
Sit down with Saber. Talk about FEELINGS and MEANING and all the deep emotional bullshit she hates so much.

>>24934562
how the hell did I forget Saber in my run-down?

>>24934561
Seconding this. We gave up our biggest weapon for helping Seibah and Sakura. It's going to goddamn work whether they want to or not.

>>24934597

>Tell Rin we fucked up with Sakura.

Are you insane.

Rin would feed us our testicles for doing something like that.

>>24934624
To be perfectly fair, Rider also thought it was a worthwhile idea.

But yes, I agree, we should never EVER tell Rin.

>>24934562
Yeah, we should probably go talk to her about that while we have the time.

>>24934624
It was Rider's idea! And we had no idea it would end this badly!
At least now we have an idea what her problem is and can come with ways to fix it.
Personally I think she's just repressing her sexuality and losing her grip every now and then. We fix this by getting Rin and Rider to give her lessons on being sexy without taking it too far.

>>24934597
>Hey Rin! We totally had Rider sneak in a sexay dream into Sakura and she's feeling bad about liking it too much.
>Wat do emotionally incompetent tsundere?
And then Rins head asploded before storming off to her home to never have contact with us again.

>>24934562
As much as I agree with the need, I think that info from body scan could be useful here ("You know, I have different body now, so we've got a shot at recontracting" or "You know, I have the same body as the last time, so you'll probably have to contract Rin. Unless you changed your mind about alternative Master?"

>>24934668

You do realise that telling Rin about this outs Shirou as having been actively planning to snag all the girls at the same time.

I don't think there will be an Emiya residence after that.

>>24934673
>>24934690
We did it because she was getting hung up on the whole 'taking him for myself' thing she had going.

>>24934729
You convince her. I'll be behind this blast shield

>>24934729
Well I do admit you have a wonderful plan for shattering our alliance that could only be topped by us getting forcibly raped on the dinner table by Souichirou or saber during a meal.

>You guys have enough points with everyone to know that confessing to fucking with their heads on any level is a bad idea.

>>24934781
Fair enough.

>>24934781
Go talk to Saber about the dream that she was trying to tell us.

>>24934781
THEN WHY DID WE THINK IT WAS A GOOD IDEA IN THE FIRST PLACE?

>>24934801
Remember what Ilya said: we're a good person, but not afraid to play dirty to make good things happen.

As long as they don't find out about it, we're in the clear.

>>24934781

And further mind suggestions would probably not be a good idea.

Gentlemen, I have a plan.

We fuck with the hot water of our house. Spoil it and do it that we can get it up and running by tomorrow, only.

The whole house goes to the public baths tonight.

We get Rin salivating over Saber's body and Rider will take this chance to have fun as well.

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>>24934839
>We get Rin salivating over Saber's body

If we're gonna 'fess up to anyone, it should be Sakura first and foremost. If she holds a grudge for that, take the punishment like a man.
At least there's one man in her life willing to make an apology.

>>24934857

>confessing is a bad idea to ANYONE.

>>24934801
Because the harem game is all about maxing out the affection stat before they can find out what's really going on. And then making sure that when, yes when, something gets out it's inconsequential enough compared to their affection score that we can just tell them to consider how happy they are with things now as a result of whatever manwhoring you did. Right now Rin and maybe Rider are the only ones we'd get away with it blowing over after "sleeping on the couch for a few days" and even then they'll still be a little pissed for the rest of their lives.

>>24934839
And then Zouken rises out of the water and lets loose in that sexy vamp drawl, "Good evening ladies. Might I interest you in some of this establishments refreshments?"

>>24934847
It's actually Rin's harem. She just let's us think highly of ourself

>>24934867
Either that or let her think it was all her.

>>24934908
What we should be doing is letting her understand that wanting hot freaky sex with the people you care about most is entirely normal and not bad and/or slutty in any way.

And eventually that we would be up for some actual hot freaky sex with her in the future.

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Or, when in doubt, get back to cooking, i don't think we've done that for a LONG time, people will get suspicious if we don't attempt to take back our place in the kitchen.

Wait for it... I've solved EVERYTHING! We mickey Sakura at dinnertime, Rulebreaker Rider, j-j-j-j-jam Rider into BestSisterPranaBattery. And then Rider infests everyone's dream with the good end. Every night a different variation. Every night until it works. We need BestSister to fuel the most powerful dreamfuckery imaginable. Sakura needs dreams of harem life making bentou's for the adorable children. Seibah finds out that the stick has been removed from her ass and found out how to selfish her way into some happiness. Rin has Rindreams about Seibah and Shirou. Caster get's dreams of married life. Shoichibrou has 8 hours of wondering why he has the weirdest boner while looking at casters expertly made figurines. And so on.

>>24934966
Let's just go and talk to Saber for now, mkay?

>>24934966
and while everyone is distracted, we go out and solo the rest of the grail war/whatever the fuck is going on right now

>Is there anything resembling a consensus?

>Because I can't see it past the 'plans'.

>>24934994
I think before wild mass guessing kicked in it amounted to "Talk to sabre"

>>24934994
The only serious suggestions I see are for Saber dream talk.

>>24934994
I can't find much other than confess and die, so i'm voting for either talking to saber or cooking

>>24934994
It's either "Ilya magic body scan" or "Saber's dreams".

It'd be good if both can be combined. Say to Saber that Caster gave the go signal later at dinner, but we need contingencies to make sure that Shirou has his body, hence the Ilya scan.

>>24934994

This: >>24934561

>>24934994

Find Sakura.

It's about time we settled her problems and we need to negate whatever hold zouken has over her.

Which means we need to address her inability to have children.

>>24934994

[x] Sakura

We've just had our talk with Saber. Can't keep pushing it.

Actions?
Souichibrou stalking
>>24934561
>>24934602

Whatever this is
>>24934581


Talk to Seibah about xyz
>>24934562
>>24934593
>>24934599
>>24934662


Horrid talk to Rin idea
>>24934597

Operation Rin Harem: Go
>>24934839

GB2 Da Kitchen
>>24934936

Remember that we Rulebreaker'd her and then ask to grope Sakura. For Science
>>24935038

Didn't check much for thoroughness or samefagging but whatever.

>>24935054
>>24935038

Rider said to give her a chance to talk it over with her first, thoough. So maybe we should wait.

>>24935056
>Whatever this is>>24934581
I meant body scan. But not being able to win this, I vote for talking with Saber about the dream.

>>24935038
Still think she's not barren until AC-guy says otherwise

>>24935173

>You still haven't investigated or asked, so it's OOC knowledge I can't tell you.

>Not saying you're wrong, but it's a bit of a Catch 22 there.

>>24935056

>Saber's the direction we seem to be leaning, so that's what I'm going with.

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>>24935054
>>24935038
>>24935108
>"The Dream thing. Sakura took a brief nap earlier today, and I took the chance to put... 'happy' thought in like you suggested."
>".... And?"
>"She didn't resist. In fact, she took the scenario a little further than I thought." She coughs.
>"Actually a lot further. But then in the Hypothetical afterglow, she suddenly wakes up and starts crying. Then she finds me, apparently completely unaware of my role in things and starts begging me to 'use my dream powers' to 'brainwash the slut out of her'."
...
>"Yeah. I think maybe she's worse than we thought. Or maybe messed up in a different way." She sighs. "Honestly, we probably should've realized this. Apparently she was.... abused.... so she'd probably have a warped view on that sort of thing, remembering the painful and embarrassing side of things."
...
>"To be fair, I didn't expect my suggestion of 'maybe share' to turn to something so... lewd." She frowns again. "Actually, that implies an entirely different set of terrifying possibilities. I think maybe the Lancer thing happened too soon."
...
>"Sakura gave me something of a pass to talk to her about uncomfortable things, so I'm going to try and repair damage there. Just be there for her in case she needs someone that isn't me to talk to."
Come on guys. Have you even read the last thread? You really think bringing up something we should know which would imply a breech of trust between her and her only confidant is a good idea? That the emotionally broken girl will in any way positively handle having all this stuff she perceives as horrible brought up by her major crush? It's Rider's show until she can make a stable foothold for us to dive in and deal the finishing blow.

>>24935173
She's like a desert. She just needs a downpour of Rin to bloom

>>24935205
Drop everything. Operation Housewide Spontaneous Womb Inspections for Rogue Hassan Operatives is a Go.

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>>24935205
>Not saying you're wrong
Therefore, I'm right!

I've been reading waaay too many political sites

>>24935205

It's possible through logical inference after she mentioned speaking french when not being able to go there in the first place when talking about the possible kids.

At least its a hint that something is wrong there and its a thread that Shirou can pursue.

I walk away from Caster's room as I hear Souichiro say something about how it's supposed to be entertaining in some way.

The way they discuss what was my trump card like some alien thing to study rapidly makes me lose hope. "Man, if all guys are this hopeless, how do humans keep existing?" I ask nobody in particular.

"Hm?" I hear Saber's voice from nearby. "Did you say something Shirou?"

"Nothing that matters." I answer, leaning against the wall. "..... Saber."

"Yes?"

"You kept trying to ask me about my dream."

She blushes. "... You're not angry are you? I mean-"

"No, I'm not angry. I don't really like talking about it but....." I look at her with a slight frown. "I just don't know why you're interested in it."

"It's just..." She sighs. "You want to help people, but you keep something like that bottled up? Some sort of pain?"

"Do you want me to talk about it?" I ask. "I used to, and it didn't help. The only thing that kinda helped was when people stopped asking and I stopped actively dwelling on it."

".... It was foolish of me to-"

"Saber." She stops, and looks at me, curious. "I'm not upset. I'm just not sure what you're trying to accomplish."

>>24935376

She frowns, and mumbles something like 'odd' under her breath. "I just.... I wanted to ask you about it. You said it was-"

"But you're curious?" I scratch the back of my neck before sitting down next to her. "It's not a huge deal. Well, actually it was but.... I don't mind you asking about it." I frown. "There was a fire about ten years ago, as you know. I'm pretty sure someone's mentioned that the fire orphaned me. I don't really remember much from before the Hospital where I spoke to Kiritsugu. I don't really remember who they were, but since nobody came looking for me afterwards I'm guessing whatever family and friends I had all died. The only thing I remember is that dream. Lying there, feeling weak and in pain ready to give up. Just kinda... watching what happened. The same dream every night like clockwork."

"... Every night? For ten Years?"

"Well, not EVERY night. I could count the exceptions on one hand though." I sigh. "But yeah, lay in the rubble, watch fire, remember painful experiences, wake up. I've done it so many times that I could see it clearly just from the sheer repetition if I wanted to focus on it." I give her a weak smile. "I try not to focus on it. No use living in the past."

She stares at me shocked. ".... Have you ever told anyone about this?"

"Dad knew, kinda. He didn't know it was a constant thing. Taiga might know, but she probably thinks it stopped since I never talked to her about it."

Saber opens her mouth, then stops like she's realizing something. "Wait, you know I saw it, right?"

".... Yes?"

"Then why did you leave out the end?"

[ ] .... That WAS the end, all of it.
[ ] .... Saber, after all this why would I lie?
[ ] .... I share my pain and you ask for more?
[ ] .... I have no idea what you mean.

>>24935381
>I have no ida what you mean

Because he doesn't, and I personally don't

>>24935381
>[ ] .... I have no idea what you mean.
How can we not choose this?

>>24935381
>[ ] .... That WAS the end, all of it.

>>24935381
>[ ] .... I have no idea what you mean.
Have we Shirou'd the worst part of the dream away?

>>24935381
>[x] .... I have no idea what you mean.

uh-oooooooh.

>>24935381
You lost me.

>>24935381
Option two is Right out given how much we lie and bullshit in this quest.

Gotta go with
> .... I have no idea what you mean.

>>24935381
[x] .... I have no idea what you mean.
youlostme.jpg

>>24935381
[].... This is the second time today someone has said something utterly incomprehensible to me, about a topic I should be intimately familiar with. The first time was Rider informing me I was not me then proceeding to stab me repeatedly. Explain. Now.

I get the feel we were supposed to [ ] .... That WAS the end, all of it. but we can't resist Shiroubait.

>>24935381
[ ] .... I have no idea what you mean.

that, via >>24935457

>>24935381
>[5]"You have seen more?"
Could mention that someone (Lancer) told us about having some barrier stopping us from remembering the whole thing.

Am I the only one that feels like AC-Guy uses the verb "to frown" very extensively in the last 2 or 3 threads?

>extinc Welcome
Yes Captcha, our end is near

>>24935465

if we can work this in, this is good and relevant.

>>24935381
>[ ] .... I have no idea what you mean. Please explain.

Hey, this is one way around that memory block Avenger said was placed on us! If we can't remember it but Saber could see it, this is almost just as good!

>>24935381
>[ ] .... I have no idea what you mean.

"To the best of my knowledge thats all of it. But this wouldn't be the first time today someone noticed something horribly and obviously wrong with me before I did. Please explain.

".... I have no idea what you mean."

Saber looks angry for a minute, then confused, then worried as she places a hand on mine. ".... You actually don't, do you?" She looks away, thinking. "I didn't really get much, it just seemed like a trivial detail so you didn't mention it."

"So you thought I was hiding something?"

"You're not always completely honest." She responds, looking at me. There's a slight... anger in her eyes, but it fades quickly. "None of us are really, but it just seemed odd that you would suddenly open up and then hide that."

".... What is it you saw?" I ask, suddenly interested.

"Right at the end, there was.... something.... on the horizon. I couldn't get a good look at it."

"I honestly don't remember that."

"There was also the voice, probably it was Kiritsugu." She says. "It sounded like a question, but it was too vague to be sure."

"Huh. Yeah, he was the one who found me, so....."

She smiles awkwardly. "There's something you can focus on. Something happy, Kiritsugu carrying you out of the fire."

I smile back. "I guess. I mean, it was probably the only kinda-good thing that happened that day. Might as well be the bit we remember."

She smiles more confidently, and we sit there in silence for a few minutes before she gets up, explaining that Caster wants her for something. It's the sudden feeling of cold there that makes me realize that she never took her hand off mine the entire time, and I smile despite myself.

>Here's the part where I post a 'what do'. I'm going to bed, feel free to debate the next actions, and if the thread lives tomorrow I'll keep running.

>>24935541
Grab her hand

Pull her down

Kiss her full on the lips

>>24935541

I vote we find sakura after this.

Remember merlin's advice? He said to speak about the fire to someone else who is broken and since we're doing the being open about our past thing, might as well find her.

>>24935541
Man, she's hiding something. I know it.

>>24935562
Arguably everyone in this house is pretty badly broken, but w/e.

>>24935541
I miss Archer. It was fun playing Troll and counter-Troll with him

>>24935541

Perceptive guy here, just letting you know that something about this post is throwing me right the fuck off.

I haven't figured it out yet, but I'll let you guys know when I realize what it is. Hopefully it's just me jumping at shadows....

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>>24935541
>Right at the end, there was.... something.... on the horizon.

Why hello there Grail-kun. Fancy meeting you here.


>>24935552
NO YOU FOOL, THAT IS NOT HOW ONE ROMANCES THE SABER!

I have no idea what to do for now, so I'll just dump my thoughts after reading Theories Pastebin.

Sixth Verse, first Merlin dream
> "Right." He says. "The important thing to remember is that you can't save her the way things are now. When she changes back, the sheath is the Key. Well, it's more like the lock than the key in reality, and not her sheath but rather it's SHADOW. Because you can't really use the real thing in the intended manner."
I bet it's about Saber, Merlin doesn't give a shit about Sakura or anyone other. After what Altria said, it sounds to me like "She can't stay now. She has to return to her time (and die properly) and then you have to summon her again.
But it doesn't make any sense with Merlin's next words about our Shadow and Avalon's Shadow.
>"Right then, the sheath needs a sword, right?"
Well, maybe I'm biased by my mother tongue, but for me it sound's like an euphemism for "she needs the D"
>"luckily you seem to have adapted well to it."
Sounds like confirmation.
>"To succeed, you first need to fail and destroy the source of your Shadow"
Sounds like "Hell no you dirty anon!"

Fifteenth Verse, Shirou and Rider at the lake
>"I just felt.... something. Like a magical whirlpool."
/Did Shirou just find the Greater Grail?/
Cain, are you there?!

Eighteenth Verse-1, Confronting Heroic Spirit EMIYA
>"No, I mean we are literally different people. You aren't me and I'm not you. I'm not even sure WHAT you are." I can see his mind racing. "How the hell are we so similar?"
/We're a clone/spare body that Avenger made/
The easiest answer - we are his brother, literally. Maybe a twin. Physically the same, magically far different.
Maybe our minute-older brother (Avenger's body and Archer) inherited a magic circuit and our was recreated by Avenger or Kerry? (Note: I don't really understand the magic inheritance thing and quick look at wiki didn't help me).
I'm afraid that a flashback is the only way to find out.

>>24935541
Thank her.
Go be creepy stalker outside Sakura's room.

>>24935541
Give heartfelt thanks to Seibah for caring.

>>24935541
I'm not exactly encouraged by a voice that is only PROBABLY Kiritsugu asking us a question.

>>24935574
Indeed. We should get him to come back and make Illya his Master. WE can explain away his betrayal with "he saw Avenger on his stroll. Recognized him as a bad guy. Bluffed his way into his good graces and proceeded to play double agent."
Hell, we probably have more than enough "evidence" we can twist around to prove it, but Archer's the one we'd have to convince to go along with the plan. As tempting as it is, "Enough Prana for an almost endless supply of broken Caladbolgs" won't be enough.

>>24935582
I have a feeling that after
>"Huh. Yeah, he was the one who found me, so....."
Something in the conversation has changed. Maybe Saber changed her mind to not tell us the truth, or maybe she has grabbed our idea and fitted it into the vague, but she's wrong.

>>24935541
>"There was also the voice, probably it was Kiritsugu." She says. "It sounded like a question, but it was too vague to be sure."

Imma guessin' this is the Grail that took the form of Kiritsugu via his and Irisviel's memories, and that the question pertains to what Shirou wished for at that moment.

>Action.
Thank Saber for clearing that up, and that we are looking forward to figuring things out together with her once Shirou is back to being her Master.

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>>24935582

>>24935607
>>24935582

Hey Guys!

Hey Guys!

Are you ready to spend the next sixteen hours panicking?\

Because I realized what bothered me.

>Kiritsugu carrying you out of the fire.

Daddy did no such thing, the rain had already put it out.

It COULDN'T have been him.

Also,

>>24935381

>mumbles something like 'odd' under her breath.

She thinks we're acting weird.

And is it just me, or is Shirou sounding more like Archer in these posts?
>>24935376
>>24935381

>>24935594
>Sixth Verse, first Merlin dream
>> "Right." He says. "The important thing to remember is that you can't save her the way things are now. When she changes back, the sheath is the Key. Well, it's more like the lock than the key in reality, and not her sheath but rather it's SHADOW. Because you can't really use the real thing in the intended manner."
>I bet it's about Saber, Merlin doesn't give a shit about Sakura or anyone other. After what Altria said, it sounds to me like "She can't stay now. She has to return to her time (and die properly) and then you have to summon her again.
>But it doesn't make any sense with Merlin's next words about our Shadow and Avalon's Shadow.
>>"Right then, the sheath needs a sword, right?"
>Well, maybe I'm biased by my mother tongue, but for me it sound's like an euphemism for "she needs the D"
>>"luckily you seem to have adapted well to it."
>Sounds like confirmation.
>>"To succeed, you first need to fail and destroy the source of your Shadow"
>Sounds like "Hell no you dirty anon!"

THis whole section.

"Shadow" implies to me Avenger and the corrupted grail.

>>"To succeed, you first need to fail and destroy the source of your Shadow"
"Failing" the Grail war would be destroying the grail, one way or another. The 'source of our shadow' seems to line up with the whole avenger-hijacking-our-body thing, with the grail!avenger begin the source.

>>24935612
only problem is he might still be getting good info on their side. And if we're half as Avenger as we think we are, then getting him back on the team will ruin that.

Note: follow up on that message sent to Issei. Maybe tell Archer about Merlin?

>>24935582
A flash of blond hair. I'm not sure if it was the dream or the reality, though.

>>24935607
As far as I can remember, Kerry never asked Shirou any questions when he was pulling him out of the fire.

I'd bet money that it isn't Kerry in that dream.

And its strange that we're repressing that end bit. If all it is is Kerry saving us, then we would have ZERO reason to repress it.

Guys, I know what we must do.

Rider spooky dream magics, to witness the whole thing in lucid detail. We must get to the bottom of this.

>>24935653
Hey. Hey Shirou hey.
Ya know that horrible dream you've had most of your life? Wanna go through it again lucid?

Waitwait

Hold on, I've forgotten, just which girls are in love with Shirou now?

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>>24935653
>Rider spooky dream magics

That might actually work.

Although I have no idea the extent or limits of her spooky dream powers, beyond that one time she dream-raped Shirou in the VN.

>>24935717
Yes

>>24935634
>And is it just me, or is Shirou sounding more like Archer in these posts?
Ilya said we are resembling Kerry, being ready to play dirty to help others. This is already more like Archer than canon young Shirou.

>>24935649
In pastebin there's a comment from AC-Guy
>In part, it was deliberately confusing, because Shirou was flipping his shit. I'm pretty sure I already said the blonde girl was him spotting Saber IRL, and her presence made him snap out of it.

>>24935694
It might be important, and its not like Shirou has ever let his own well-being stand in the way of getting shit done. No sense in starting now.

>>24935594
>>24935638
I might have the next pastebin done by the time the thread starts later. I'm going to wait a bit before working on it though, AC-Guy isn't the only one that needs some sleep.
>>24935647
I know. This is more of a "Archer runs out of Prana and will fade soon. What do" plan more than anything. Archer's on his 4th Masterless day here, and he's already caladbolg the Matou manor, fought Gilgamesh at least once offscreen, projected Rho Aias to save our ass, and god knows what else we aren't aware of. Unless Avenger is somehow supplying him with prana for helping out, he can't last much longer.

We could pass a message to Issei to give to Archer saying "When you're low on prana and done working with Avenger, we can clear your name. Buy a damn cellphone like everyone else and call us instead of going through Issei when that happens!" or something along those lines.

>>24935744
>Buy a damn cellphone like everyone else

Change that to "Even Rin has a cellphone now. Why don't you?" and you've got my support.

>>24935735
right, but I can see him blowing off the concern

"Guys, it's just the recurring dream I've had most of my life of the day when everyone around me died. It's not that important"

Obviously the girls will have to hold him down while Rider does her work. For his own good of course

>>24935720
That's not a sufficient answer

>>24935785
Caster's taken, Ilya and Taiga are our sisters. Everyone else living in the house is targetted.
.
.
.
Also Assassin

>>24935771
Really? because here is how I see it going:


Shirou: "Rider, I need you to use your spooky dream magics to help me relive my worst nightmare so I can see the repressed bit at the end."

Rider: "Are you sure thats a good idea? It might be repressed for a good reason."

Shirou: "It also might be important, remember it was the end to the 4th War that caused the fire, I might have witnessed something important. I'll be totally fine. I also might scream and thrash alot, so be prepared for that."

Entire Harem: "Shirou, seriously, are you sure you're ready for this?."

Shirou: "Ready for what? I really don't see what the big deal is."

>>24935810
Neat

>>24935810

Eh, this works.

>>24935810
And then all Shirou sees is https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xBp8iK7fsyE
I'm sorry, I posted that and I don't even

>>24935785
Everyone except Taiga, caster, souchirou, and Issei. We even have Hassan points. We're going to hit Ilya like a stealth bomber at the end and have a monogamous relationship in germany. The Shirou twins will be named Idon'tfollow and Explainfurther.

>>24935846
Oh god, the mental image of Shirou Shirou-ing naming a child

Then doing the same thing for the children of all the other women in the harem.

>>24935846
>Hassan points

So that's why he abducted our body?

>>24935874
The hatesex sciencebuttbabies with Archer will still be the cutest. And that moment when Archer tells Shirou he's pregnant

>>24935846
>We even have Hassan points.
We wouldn't get the bike if we had no golden points (Unless it was a trap. Quite effective, to be honest).

>>24935899
This is another thing i can see happening

Albeit via Archer pretending sex happened during a time when Shirou was drunk or something and faking pregnancy via stuffing a pillow down his shirt and complaining about back pain.

He would do it to, just to fuck with Shirou

>>24935875
Yes

It's pretty obvious that this Hassan is afemale Hassan disguised as a man and she's beginning to fall for our monumental stupidswag

>>24935875
Yeah. He couldn't stand not being able to have significant contact with us so he stole himself a Shirou

>>24935917
Gil's always so angry cause we wont stop by his tent at night and fuck him properly like the angry henchman he is. He'll keep escalating until we do.

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>>24935931

>>24935634

>implications

But... that means someone found shirou... and then put him back?

Why? WTF?

The flash of golden hair was mentioned the last time Shirou was on fire. What if that was gilgamesh and not a overlay of saber?

>>24935541
>what do
It's a bit late in this wave of ridiculousness but I'd say, first, just watch her go with that stupid smile on our face, and then get the damn body scan from sister (I won't give up).

>>24935997
Yeah, Kin-Kaiser was picking children for his living mana storage.
>Picks up Child!Shirou
>Nope, too dense.
>Puts him back

>>24936013
I fully agree that should be our course of action for now.

Rider spooky dream magics should probably wait until we're, ya know, ASLEEP. So unless we're going to take a nap in the middle of the day it'll have to wait a bit.

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>>24936013
Keep in mind that if we don't get enough Saber points and explain to her, with a powerpoint, the midlife-crisis that is archer we're going to lose her.

>>24936024
What time is it, anyway? We've been to mall with Seibah, we visited church and talked to Zouken, got killed by Rider, escaped from Church, calmed the fuck everyone, spoke to Kuzuki, Caster and Saber... I think it's evening already.

>>24936051
We haven't had dinner yet. So mid-late afternoon probably.

I love how we measure time in Meals rather than hours.

>>24936024
>>24936043

I am now curious if Rider can bring people into other people's dreams as observers.

Imagine if we have Rider trigger a nightmare for us. Said nightmare being Shirou rejecting Archer's fatalism.

And Rider brings saber in by 'want to see what ails him?'

>>24936068
It's sometimes claimed thatShirou has the instincts of a warrior

This is not true, not at all, Shirou has the instincts of a chef, his life is run by meal times, he instinctually guards his kitchen as a scared place, even his magical power is just as good at making kitchen knives as it is at making weapons of war.

>>24936081
What if she goes the Shirou has a fatal disease and I need you help tonight to save him! route? Misunderstanding Saber moe

>>24936043
>Keep in mind that if we don't get enough Saber points
Yes I know. But I don't think we can get more points here. And telling her to stop when duty calls can cause loss.

>>24936081
>Said nightmare being Shirou rejecting Archer's fatalism.
And then the truth about our alliance with Archer slips out, because we don't control our dream. Do I have to remind you that main suspects of betrayal are Rider's Master and Saber's Master?

>>24936180
And thus, sex cures the Shirou.

So what the fuck is up with "Princess Bride", anyway?
Never saw the movie. Why is it supposed to be special?

>>24936394
Memorable characters and snappy dialogue?

You need to watch it. Your life will never be the same again.

>>24936394

See

>>24933402

>>24936394
Why are you asking a stupid question when you could WATCH THE FUGGIN MOVIE

>>24936593
Because I don't intend to pirate every single movie just because it might be good.
And I've had more than enough bad choices through overhyped stuff on the internet.
Like any of the Alien movies besides the first one.

>>24936642
>Pirate
>Princess Bride

You are a sad, soulless man.

>>24936642
This is a classic son. Now put on your big boy panties and go buy a real copy

>>24936667
>>24936675
Yeah and then you tell me that Highlander was a fucking awesome movie.
I already know the tricks. You won't get me to waste my money like that.

>>24936710
Okay, how about this. You're allowed to pirate it just this once provided you swear on your True Love that you'll buy a genuine copy of the movie if you enjoyed it.

GIVE THEM THE DICK ALREADY

>>24937279
No man that could easily lead to horrendous bad ends at this point.

>>24937370
I'd put the dick in their bad ends, if you know what I mean.

>>24937413
By which you mean Buttsex, I presume.

Good to know.

>>24937413
Armpit sex is a little too lewd for these folks I'd say. Gotta warm them up first.

>>24931176
So my theory is that we're a copy of Shirou created by the grail at the end of the fire, while the real shirou was taken into the grail to become Avenger's new body.

>>24935582
Just checked the thread and saw this. Guys you do realise that in canon Shirou only stopped and layed down after he could go no further and at that time he was no longer human enough to think much of anything.

AC-guy stated that we don't remember trying to escape simply that we laid there, this is a change. Inert shards of a grail and a living Shirou where he should be dead. A body that isn't totally human, a strange voice asking us a question before we were found by Kiritsugu, and the image of the greater grail in the distance. Does none of this add up to you guys?

>>24938753
The idea that Shirou's the Lesser Grail has been floated before. We can't say for sure only because we can't figure out the mechanism by which it would come to pass.

Wishing on the Grail seems most likely, but there are indications that the changes to Shirou were intentional, and we have no idea who could have done it.

>>24939959
Remember mentions of Merlin setting things up to make everything easy as hell for us? I think he was going to try tampering with shirou to improve him somehow but somehow managed to get a Shirou that was already wildly divergent, i.e. wished on the grail to live.

We aren't being healed by exscalibur but by our previous wish upon the grail.

>>24936710
Any man who has not seen the princess bride and learned its ways is not yet a true man.

Any woman, some sort of woman shaped husk that is actually an asexual insect creature.

>>24940042
>wished to live

does that make us immortal?

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>>24940319
>does that make us immortal?
No, just invincible.

>>24936593
Borrow it from the local library. Duh!

>>24939959

Why haven't we detected the souls of the fallen Servants within us, yet?

>>24940465
>Borrow it from the local library
>Local Library
Those still exist?

>>24940493
They do. They are called The Pirate Bay

Bump?

bump

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>>24933991
Many hours late, but have an Ilya

>>24936051
Timeline guy here, and my magical Fate/Again clock dictates that it's mid afternoon.
Getting killed by Rider and coming home happened in the early afternoon, and didn't take up more than a few minutes for the entire escapade. Not even kidding.

>>24936710
>Princess Bride
>Waste of money
I don't even... what?

Pointed reminder that Demon Shirou evidence has not changed. We can still detect emotions through walls, and have spooky magic. Remember to factor this in to Grail-Shirou debates.

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Bamp

>>24940465
>Why haven't we detected the souls of the fallen Servants within us, yet?
Because the only one confirmed to have died is Caster's False Assassin.

>>24940465
>Why haven't we detected the souls of the fallen Servants within us, yet?
Do you know what the soul of a fallen servant feels like?

Exactly

bump

>Can someone get me a consensus to work with?

>>24947832
It sounds like Rider must use her spooky dream magic on us to relive our most horrid nightmare

>>24947832
call an orgy in our bedroom

>>24947832
Nightmare magic time

>>24947855
Preferably with out girls near us to provide Moral comfort.

>>24947855
>>24947858

>It's only late-ish afternoon. Rider's also still occupied with Sakura.

>>24947832
Variations of "Thank Saber."
Romancing is optional.

Afterwards, it's either "Ilya Scan" or more "Talk to Sakura."

>>24947832
Off-hand, it seems like people were deciding between "thanking Saber" and checking upon Sakura. And then some people proposed having Rider take a peek into Shirou's head.

>>24947892
Pst, hey... welcome back.

>>24947832
Ask Rider if her spooky dream magics would let us see the end of that nightmare.

Also, Ilya full-body magic scan. Make sure Zouken didn't slip something into us while he had us unconscious and at his mercy.

>>24947892
Ilya magical X-ray now. We still haven't done that since getting our real body back. Gotta make sure we aren't a magical timebomb or something else horrible.

Spooky Rider magics later.

>>24947928
Oh, I am pretty sure he slipped something into us, if you know what I mean

>>24947951
Please, no more innuendo about Mr. Rapeworm

>>24947892
Okay, so Rider's for after dinner, Sakura's busy, we just talked to sabre...

It's down to Ilya-scan or making out with Rin.

Or I suppose we could do magic practice or something. Make future rolls easier.

>>24947892
Let's have Illya scan us again now that we're in our real body.

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>>24947832
>Last post is right before I take an eight hour car ride.
>Get home, refresh quest.
>On the bottom is this post.
mfw

I think we were going to try to talk about the fire with Sakura or ask Rider for a mindrape.

>>24947892
This not being possible, we ought to have Illya give us a once over or try to get in touch with Archer.

>>24947894
Oh! Forgot to add along with those options.

[ ] Clear up with Archer the message that Shirou left.