>>25020695
-----------------------------------------------
Ogir Place (+Floating, +Limbs, +Sandstorm Drill, +Magma Shield, +Steering Wheel)
-----------------------------------------------
Population: 153/153 ogres (6 dead), 84/84 elves, ∞/∞ patchwings, 50/50 Solar Skellies
- [Landmarks] Oasis, Daphnaia, Underground Cave/Quarry [50% mined]
- [Food] Cacti(-ow), Fungi, Wheat, Potatoes, Ravager Meat, Milk; Fair Growth (+32/turn)
- [Resources] Hellfire Energy [Captive Archdemon Lord], Sandstone, Iron+Chromite Ores, Featherstone, Aquifer Pebbles
- [Diplomacy] Scaratone [ALLIED; Featherstone Carts, Fungi, Paper]; Felpowder Elves [UNITED]; Achievement Hunter Dwarves [???]

- [Key Items] Tomes (Dragon Lore, Illusory Magic I, Necromancy I), Crazy Ghost's Books
- [Arms] Cactus Maces, Iron Scimitars, Heat-Seeking Rokkit Launchers, Short-Ranged Bow+Arrow, Crude Iron Armor, Demon Helm/Shoulderpads; Ur-Camouflage
- [Vocations] OGRES: Geo (∞), Berserks (4), BMasters (1), Rockkits (0), Riders (0), Heallusionist (0)
- [Beasts] Giant Bats (trained), Naked Mole Ravagers (trained)
- [Settlement] Reinforced Rock Shanties, Storehouse, Mushroom Farms, Pier, Anchor/Staircase, THE FLAMES OF HELL

- [NPCs] Boss Bawss Fistboss [+30 Diplomacy], Geomancer Gubbins [+30 Geomancy, +WE ALL GEOMANCERS NOW, +Ruoumoko], Beastkrumpa Squiggles Irwin [+Beast Whisperer, Big Vulture], Celicia Silverstone [???], Vultan [???]
- [Tech] Fire, Fish, Agriculture[+Protection], Cooking, Tea, Mine, Smelt/Forge, Write/Read, Hats, FStone Flight, FStone Airdrops, Airships, Ur-Cartography
- [Magic] Geomancy X, Healing I, Illusion I, Necromancy I, Time I, Climate Control 0
- [Economy] System=Barter; Currency=Shit
- [Justice] Krumpin' Duels / Boss Knows Best
-----------------------------------------------

ROLLS
>Any Doubles: STUPID LUCKY
>100: SO BRILLIANT IT'S STUPID
>90-98: Stupidly Successful
>60-90: Successful
>40-60: Adequate
>10-40: Not So Good
>2-10: SO STUPID THAT IT'S BRILLIANT
>1: LUCKY STUPID

(Cont.)

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>>25020706

Not many creatures are able to live on the topside of the Scouring Wastes, the mercilessly hot desert comprising the bulk of Terra Incognita.

Standing in the midst of one of two reality-warping, horrifically-armed titans currently squaring off against each other, with scores of stunned insect-men surrounding their feet far below, Celicia Silverstone can't help but feel that this upcoming fight could VERY drastically reduce that already-small number of desert inhabitants.

"A giant earth elemental wielding a spider demon sword, equipped with a steel robo-helmet and shoulderpads of undead bone, with a whole flock of bird-men flyin' around its head," Lockstock mutters to himself. The mutters quickly turns to mad giggling, and the dwarf gleefully rubs his soot-covered hands together. "Nae THAT'S a feat so rare that we'll hafta make a whole other category of 'cheevos!"

"And the fact that we're fighting a demon-possessed walking oasis-golem?" Queen Kilkkarak of the Scaratones chitters, the insectoid monarch trying not to shift her bulk too much in the confined space.

"Hah! This'll be one for the records, make no mistake about it!" Lockstock fires back. "I don't think we even have a WORD for how amazing that is!"

Celicia glances down at the ground far beneath them, dotted with Scaratone hives and the awestruck masses of beetle-men and Formichroma alike. Despite the fact that she's standing inside the head of an oversized lava elemental, her vision remains completely unobstructed, free from such inconvenient things as actual lava, elemental brains, or anything remotely resembling reality.

"... I think the word you're looking for is 'utterly insane situation with loads of collateral damage,'" Celicia deadpans.

(Cont.)

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>>25020717
"Yah, I kinda wanna avoid dat, too, but."

The other 'pilots' fall silent when Boss Bawss Fistboss of the Ogir Place ogres speaks up. He flexes his hands, squinting out at the titan standing before them. "Don't think da Formichroma Prophet's gonna stand 'round and wait-"

The larger ogre's immediately cut off as the possessed Ogir Place jabs at them with the business end of a drill made entirely out of a magically-enhanced sandstorm. Ruoumoko, the lava elemental moonlighting as a giant robot, reacts instinctively, slapping the attack away with a hand of molten rock- inside Ruoumoko's suddenly moving head, the 'pilots' barely manage to stay on their feet.

Celicia grits her teeth, her pointed ears laid flat against her skull. "Dammit, we need a plan!" she yells out. "Geomancer Gubbins, this- this MONSTROSITY is of your own make, isn't it? What are WE doing here!?"

The smaller ogre shrugs from where he's standing- in a wide-legged, firmly-anchored stance common to all ogre geomancers when they're busy pumping out as much magic juju as they can. "Dunno! I'm just doin' my usual thing an' holding Ruoumoko together! Da boss is calllin' da shots!"

Immediately, Boss Bawss Fistboss feels four pairs of eyes staring right on him.

Right. A plan.

[ ] [DORF-AGGRESS] Take the fistfight to the Yellow Ant, we can't let him knock us around for much longer!
[ ] [ELF-AGGRESS] Keep the Yellow Ant at bay with overwhelming and preferably ranged firepower!
[ ] [BUG-AGGRESS] Queen Kilkkarak, you've GOTTA have some sort of ace up your sleeve for situations like this!
[ ] [SKEDADDLE] Move to another location, we're going to end up destroying ALL of Scaratone Hive if we duke it out here!
[ ] [WRITE-IN!]

>>25020695
MOTHER. FUCKING. OGRE. QUEST.

My day is now officially made. How've you been, Blorp?

>>25020728
What terrible options are these? We're having a giant robot fight, there's only one choice.

[X] [ELEMENTAL-AGGRESS] Punch Ogir Place as hard as we can.

Any damage to it can be fixed with geomancy

>>25020728
[X] [SKEDADDLE] Move to another location, we're going to end up destroying ALL of Scaratone Hive if we duke it out here!

And by skedaddle I mean bullrush Ogir place and keep on punching it while pushing it somewhere else.

>>25020695
IT LIVES!

>>25020728
[X] [PATCHWING-AGGRESS] Grapple Ogir Place and jump the both of us away from all the insects. This way we can have MANLY GIANT FISTICUFFS away from the collateral damage.

>>25020805
>>25020837
Combo these. Push, punch, and shove Ogir place else where for this fight.

>>25020805
I really like this solution. But can we one-punch Ogir Place away from the hive without destroying our ally's home in the process?

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>>25020760
Busy, sick, and busy again, in that order! And also quickly discovering that pizza is amazing if you want to go into a food coma, and not so much if you want to do anything involving thinking.

Hmm- consensus so far seems to be PUNCH-COMBO SKEDDADLE.

>>25020920
[x] THIS

>>25020979
Unfortunately, I have to skedaddle. Grabbing a beer with a friend I haven't seen in a while. Just wanted to tell you I love your quest, Blorp, and am in awe of the patience and sanity with which you deal with all the sanity-shattering plans we cook up. You are the Cecilia to /tg/'s Bawss.

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>>25020805
>>25020837
>>25020920
>>25020969
>>25021001
>Punch Kick It's All In The GET THE FUCK AWAY FROM THIS PLACE

OKAY

>***STUPID LUCKY TIME?***
ROLL d100! (dice+1d100 in the email field)

Rolled 59

>>25021044
Nat 1 here we come!

Rolled 33

>>25021044
Ogre time.

Rolled 48

>>25021044
GO GO OGRE RANGERS

>>25021066
OGRE TIIIIIIIIIIME! YEAAAAAAAH!

>>25021066
>33
>66
YEAAAAAAAAAH!

>>25021066
Good to see /tg/ dice still love ogres.

Rolled 36

>>25021044
FUCK YOU INVADER

>>25020920
this

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>>25021066
Doh shit, it's Ogre time!

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>>25021066
............................. GUESS THAT'S WHAT I GET FOR TAKING A BREAK

Rolled 74

>>25021044
Let's go ogres

>>25021165
Oh Blorp, don't you ever learn?

Rolled 40

>>25021044
.

Rolled 21

>>25021044
Here's a twist: we know Ogir Place inside and out, and we know about the hellemental powering it. Do we have any of the Aquifer Pebbles handy? Could we get Gubbins and Irwin to fly Vultan and the Big Vulture into Ogir Place and drop an Aquifer Pebble down one of its thermal exhaust ports?

>>25021365
(Sorry, forgot to turn my dice off.)

>>25021365
Infinite water, just add water. I like it.

Ask Irwin to fly up there on a bat and drop one down the right shaft with a bucket of water while we distract him.

>>25021365
Death Star trench run?

>>25021430
Death Star trench run.

>>25021434
Death Star trench run!

>>25021445
Death Star trench run‽

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>>25021365
>>25021426
>>25021430
>>25021434
>>25021445
IT'S CERTAINLY POSSIBLE, YES

>>25021466
Get to work Blorp. We all know you only have limited san left. We want to do this while you're still lucid.

>>25021507
>Get to work Blorp. We all know you only have limited san left. We want to do this while you're still lucid.

Especially since it's our job to have you rolling for SAN loss as often as possible.

>>25021528
How low is his SAN score anyway?

>>25021466

Wait, wait!


Guys, this is our home, though. Even if its currently possessed.

We STILL want to get it back intact, right?


What would happen if we dropped the Aquifer Pebbles like that?

What sort of shape would that leave our home in?

>>25021621
About -13. But it fluctuates wildly I've been told.

>>25021636
As long as we make sure the demon doesn't get loose, we can easily rebuild.

Easily. A week or two tops.

>>25021636
>What sort of shape would that leave our home in?
Damage done should be able to be fixed through geomancy.

>>25021636
Magic clean up with our allies montage. We cast healing spells on Ogir Place until its fixed.

>>25021636
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Q7hn3XImO0U

>>25021636
The cave he's in floods.

We remove the pebble and drain it. Good as new.

Fuck, guys. Almost forgot our theme song for this battle.

CHOOSE:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lWKQiZVBtu4
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7Wt6XlVob_E
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7QTjmc9RGs8

Rolled 1

>>25021694
In reverse order.

>>25021694
>https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7Wt6XlVob_E
>https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7QTjmc9RGs8

We're in a giant mecha. Has to be one of these.

Though when we go for the trench run, we'll want a theme music power up towards something more appropriate for that.

>>25021636
could use time magic to restore it as well.

Or for extra SAN damage grab a future ogre place that's even better, we just have to remember to to build it at some point...

>>25021694
For me I got to go with something from Megas.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aqs3RVoruOg

>>25021727
... Very well then.

>>25021747
That one or this:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6GdPOMYLNoU

For me at least.

>>25021747
That just sounds like a three-minute drum loop.

>>25021769
Much better, though I still prefer one of these two:
>>25021728

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>>25021053
>>25020728
>>25021066
>59
>33/66
>STUPID LUCKY

For a gigantic chunk of desert rock with blocky limbs, Ogir Place moves with an uncanny smoothness, the joints and connections sliding around in a way seldom associated with stone ANYTHINGS.

"What's wrong, Boss Bawss of the brute-warriors?" the Yellow Ant taunts with a measure of his former confidence, his voice booming out from the heart of Ogir Place. "Afraid to damage your hearth and home?" The oasis-golem shifts its footing, cocking its sandstorm drill back for another go. "With an attitude like THAT, heathen, and this duel will be over faster than you can say-"

And then Ruoumoko jabs Ogir Place right where its face would be, knocking it back a few steps.

Far below, the assorted Scaratone and Formichroma onlookers scatter like cockroaches as the oasis-golem staggers away, its body slowly rotating back and forth as the Yellow Ant tries to shake off his sudden disorientation. "What in the blazes--?"

Ruoumoko jabs Ogir Place again, this time with more force.

"Ow! OW! Stop that!" the Yellow Ant shrieks, the oasis-golem's huge hands clutching the upper front area of its body. Unsteadily, Ogir Place continues toddling backward. "Stop punching me in the face! This thing doesn't even HAVE a face, how are you-"

In lieu of actually responding, Ruoumoko continues unleashing lightning-fast jabs against Ogir Place, each hitting the exact same spot as the one before and forcing it back at a fairly steady pace.

"Who woulda thunk it?" Lockstock mutters, stroking his beard as Boss Bawss Fistboss jabs the air, causing Ruoumoko to mirror his movements. "That Yellow Ant's got himself a glass jaw, the poor lad."

(cont.)

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>>25021903
Rather than contemplate exactly how Boss Bawss Fistboss knows how to hit the jaw on a featureless oasis-golem, or how he managed to hit a previously-unknown weak point on the first run through, Celicia squints out the back of Ruoumoko's head, taking stock of their surroundings. "Okay, I think we're clear of the Scaratone Hives. Can you confirm that, your Highness?"

"Oh, certainly," Queen Kilkkarak nods, the gesture looking curiously human(oid) for the sentient insect queen. "If the hives aren't visible any more, that is the end of our few above-ground holdings, yes-yes."

"Enough with the light punches already!" Ogir Place suddenly steps forward and swings with his other arm, the impossible magma shield knocking away Ruoumoko's twelfth jab. "Such cheap tactics will no longer work on the Formichroma Prophet!"

"I know." Boss Bawss Fistboss drops his tired arms to his side and grins, all despite the sweat beading on his forehead.

"Dat's why I got THIS."

[ ] [ELF-AGGRESS] Put Celicia at the helm, solving all the world's dakka problems.
[ ] [BUG-AGGRESS] Put Queen Kilkkarak at the helm, calling down the swarm.
[ ] [DORF-AGGRESS] Put Lockstock at the helm and let him roll out an EXPLOSIVELY good time.
[ ] [BONE-AGGRESS] Put the skeletons in charge. Prepare to board the enemy vessel!
[ ] [BIRD-AGGRESS] Put the Patchwings in charge. Dive! Diiiiive!
[ ] [TRENCH RUN] Flyer + Aquifer Pebble + Ogir Place exhaust port = ???
[ ] [COMBO OF THE ABOVE]
[ ] [WRITE-IN!]

>>25021920
[X] [OGRE-AGGRESS] FULL FUCKING NELSON
[X] [BONE-AGRESS] Prepare to board the enemy vessel!
[X] [TRENCH RUN] Flyer + Aquifer Pebble + Ogir Place exhaust port = ???

>>25021920
[X] [COMBO OF THE ABOVE]
[X] [ELF-AGGRESS] Put Celicia at the helm, solving all the world's dakka problems.

[X] [TRENCH RUN] Flyer + Aquifer Pebble + Ogir Place exhaust port = ???

Celicia uses all of the Dakka to keep him off balance and unable to see Squiggles flying in on a daring attack run. Remember, Squiggles installed a targeting computer on the vulture just so he could turn it off for this.

>>25021920
>[ ] [BUG-AGGRESS] Put Queen Kilkkarak at the helm, calling down the swarm.

Her arch-enemy, her move.

>[ ] [ELF-AGGRESS] Put Celicia at the helm, solving all the world's dakka problems. You can't go wrong with Dakka.

[ ] [TRENCH RUN] Flyer + Aquifer Pebble + Ogir Place exhaust port = ???
While Dakka we sneak in with a few fliers. Distract and destroy!

>>25021920

distract with:
[X] [DORF-AGGRESS] Put Lockstock at the helm and let him roll out an EXPLOSIVELY good time.

while:
[X] [TRENCH RUN] Flyer + Aquifer Pebble + Ogir Place exhaust port = ???

>>25021903
>this thing doesn't even have a face
>HUE
>>25021920
[ELF-AGGRESS]
[TRENCH-RUN]

I wanna see what Cecilia does with OGRE POWER at her fingertips.

>>25021920
>[X] [TRENCH RUN] Flyer + Aquifer Pebble + Ogir Place exhaust port = ???
>[X] [BIRD-AGGRESS] Put the Patchwings in charge. Dive! Diiiiive!
>>25021950
>[X] [OGRE-AGGRESS] FULL FUCKING NELSON
>[X] [COMBO OF THE ABOVE]

We need the Patchwings providing air cover for the trench run, Boss Bawss putting Ogir Place in a headlock to keep it steady as long as possible, and then the trench run as the finisher.

>>25021920
[x]DISTRACT with Explosives and Dakka!
while our Boys do the
[x]DEATH STAR TRENCH RUN!

>>25021920
[X] [BUG-AGGRESS] Put Queen Kilkkarak at the helm, calling down the swarm.
[X] [TRENCH RUN] Flyer + Aquifer Pebble + Ogir Place exhaust port = ???

Take the helm, Queenie, WE'RE GOING IN.

>>25021983
>>25021974
>>25021969
Fourthing [ELF-AGGRESS]+[TRENCH RUN]; I want to see Celicia going full ogre.

>>25021920
>>25021990
Oh yeah, this guys. We'll get Squiggles to go on that trench run and have the Patchwings provide interference while we let Cecilia do her own thing.

>>25021920
You had me at "Dakka!"

>[] [ELF-AGRESS]!
This is hopefully not PASSIVE-AGRESS!

Also,
>[] [TRENCH RUN] it must be done!

Poster of >>25021365 and >>25021990 here; I'm retracting the latter in favor of
>>25021983
; let's see what Celicia can do with this giant mecha to cover the trench run.

>>25021973
How about we use that as a finisher?

But anyway, the trench run seems like a sure thing already along with having Cecilia take control of the helm. We'll also have the Patchwings providing protection for whoever will do the trench run, right?

>>25022108
Of course; we'll need Patchwing Wings Antilles to provide cover.

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>>25021920
I think we all know what we need to do.

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>>25022155
with all the missiles as well

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>>25022161

>>25022155
>>25022161
>>25022171
Ogre-Dorf collaboration attack?

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>>25022171
and finally

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>>25021920
>ELF AGGRESS
>TRENCH RUN

One roll first! Can Celicia pull it off, distracting the Yellow Ant long enough to pull off an Aquifer Pebble bombing run?

>***STUPID LUCKY TIME?***
ROLL d100! (dice+1d100 in the email field)

Rolled 83

>>25022196
Yes, she can!

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Rolled 64

>>25022196

Rolled 55

>>25022196
ELF TIME!

Rolled 65

>>25022196
Dakka!

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Rolled 87

>>25022218
>>25022213

>>25022220
The Goddess smiles upon us this day.

Rolled 28

>>25022196
Please, she's one of the ogres, of course she can.

>>25022220
Fuuuuck. This is my second dubs roll in this thread.

I....I may be full of ogre power now.

Rolled 61

>>25022196
Lady Luck

Rolled 46

>>25021066
>Rolled 33
>Ogre time.

>>25022220
>Rolled 55
>ELF TIME!

Trench run time?

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Rolled 71

>>25022251
I'm quickly running out of Megas images

Rolled 93

>>25022251
>>25022279
Eh, it was worth a try.

>>25022251
Blorp's taking consecutive critical hits to his SAN; how long can he last?

Rolled 82

>>25022196

Rolling

Rolled 2

>>25022365

Rolling again

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>>25022342

>>25022220
You know how we keep making jokes about how elves are super adaptable to their environments and everything?

>55

I think Cecilia just became the first true Ogre-Elf...

Rolled 18

>>25022473
>I think Cecilia just became the first true Ogre-Elf...

After this, we need to make her an honorary ogre.

If we haven't already.

>>25022494
We put a hat on her, turn her tree into a hat, and gave her a proper Ogre hug, she's an Ogre already.

>>25022522
Not to mention gave her a hand.

Rolled 11

>>25022522

Yeah, but let's make it official.

>>25022537
There, guys. It's official.

>>25022220
>>25022537
MAXIMUM OGREDRIVE

Rolled 11

>>25022560
>MAXIMUM OGREDRIVE

A world full of ogres and sentient, murderous cars?

>>25022537
I hope Blorp saves this roll for an ancient Ogre initiation ceremony Baws makes up on the spot after all the dust settles.

Rolled 17

>>25022537
>>25022615

I just rolled two 11's.

>>25022615
apparently so.

>>25022627
That's when you know you're legit.

>>25022615
Wot did you do?!?!?

>>25022615
Great, now the Ogretek armor has murdercar mode.

>>25022627
Let the Ogreness overtake you.

It's a good pain.

Rolled 50

>>25022665
>>25022645
>>25022639
>>25022638
>>25022630

I AM THE LORD OF 11s!!!

(Should I trip? No fucking clue how to do that.)

>>25022683
>Should I trip?
Gods no. Dont be a fucking attention whore just because you got two 11s once.

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Rolled 80

>>25022537
>>25022615
>Blorp's face when

I'm glad I arrived in time for the insanity.

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>>25022645

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OGRES! OGRESOGRESOGRESOGRESOGRESOGRESOGRESOGRESOGRESOGRESOGRESOGRESOGRESOGRES
Yes.........

Rolled 61

>>25022696
>Gods no. Dont be a fucking attention whore just because you got two 11s once.

That sounds like a yes to me.

Rolled 10

>>25022196

I'm back, what'd I miss?

Rolled 82

>>25022683

YOU FOOL.

>>25022808
>Ogres

Rolled 89

>>25022808

Dunno, but Blorp is missing right now.

Rolled 69

>>25022835

Damn.

I prepped these amazing rolls too.

Rolled 22

>>25022196

YOU'VE BEEN GONE FOR 36 MINUTES

STOP SEIZING AND POST

Rolled 1

>>25022850
>69

Tears?

Rolled 97

>>25022858
Well that escalated quickly

People need to chill it takes time to make the post. So give him that time.

>>25022888
I think it was the food coma comment earlier that has a few of us on edge. Well, that and the OGRE-tier rolls.

There better be a line saying "FIRE ALL ROCKS!" in Blorp's next post

>>25022995

Howitzer?

YOU MEAN OGREWITZER?

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>>25022196
>>25022213
>>25022220
>[X] [ELF AGGRESS]
>[X] [TRENCH RUN]
>83 - Successful!
>55 - ... EVEN MORE SUCCESS

... and immediately after saying that, Boss Bawss Fistboss grabs Celicia by her thin shoulders, hefts her up, and plops her down right where he was standing before backing off a few paces.

The blonde elf blinks. "... wat."

"You're gonna hafta fill in for me for a bit," Boss Bawss rumbles. Now that Celicia notices, the larger ogre's looking a little bit ragged. "I gotta let da boys know wot they have to do next."

Celicia's right eyelid twitches. "Wat. Boss Bawss, in case you haven't noticed, I'm an elf. An /elf/. There's no way I can just-" She waves her hands around. "- just do all this ogre shit! I-"

Boss Bawss cuts her off with a shake of his head. "Nah. You elves, you're all our friends, right? Dat means you're honorary ogres. Kyew-Eee-Dee."

"... what," Celicia repeats, her repertoire of arguments shattered in the face of ogre obstinacy. Boss Bawss fishes out one of his many hats and places it on the elf's head, patting it fondly.

"There. Now it's official. Now if you'll 'scuse me, I gotta go talk to da boys..." With that, the larger ogre moves off into the depths of Ruoumoko's head, rapidly disappearing from sight.

Celicia gapes for a moment before looking back outside, staring at the mildly terrifying Ogir Place and its equally-terrifying sandstorm drill. "What the hell do I do!?" she squawks, her drillmaster evaporating in the face of ogre innovation made into stone.

"It's easy! You just go whoosh and bam and whoopee!" Gubbins calls out eagerly.

"... I think what he MEANS is do an action and this strange fiery giant will follow suit, yes-yes," Queen Kilkkarak adds, a bit more helpfully. "Unless you would like me to-"

(Cont.)

>>25023136
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2uQ76qrlK78

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>>25023170
The Scaratone Queen is interrupted as Ruoumoko shudders, dealt a glancing hit from Ogir Place's sandstorm drill.

"'This'? What is 'this'?" The Yellow Ant booms out. "Do not keep me waiting, brute-warrior! What, did you turn control over to one of your small, piddling allies?" he seethes, Ogir Place's various exhaust vents hissing in sympathy. "The squat mole-men with their explosives? The thin childish tree-men with their cowardly rifles? Is this not serious enough for you to face me directly, ogre!? I am not in a gaming mood! I-"

There is an almost audible snapping noise as, after all these days and weeks of constant abuse, something in Celicia's overtaxed mind finally gives way with a blessed sigh.

"SHUT-"

Ogir Place jerks in surprise as the giant lava elemental suddenly reaches for something strapped to its back, and the possessed oasis golem quickly tries to bring up its magma shield-

"- THE FUCK-"

- but between an ant's shield and an elf's ability to quick-draw-

"- UP!"

- there's absolutely no contest. In one smooth motion, Ruoumoko draws the giant-sized demon sword Coreweaver and, with a CRACK of shattered stone, slams it right down on the oasis, neatly splitting the lake into two halves.

(cont.)

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>>25023202
As the Yellow Ant's vessel stumbles back, everyone inside Ruoumoko's head stares at Celicia- the elf's pose mirroring that of the elemental, except with her battered rifle instead of a sword- and the fact that the blonde elf looks absolutely livid.

"You shut your filthy whore mouth," Celicia hisses, eyes narrowed and ears laid flat against her head. "YOU picked my soldiers off one by one, and tried to pin it on the goddamn Scaratones! YOU dragged us all out here for a duel you thought would be a curbstomp, and got all fucking PISSY because you didn't figure FUCKING OGRE INSANITY into your grand overarching plan of genocide! And you..."

Celicia ratchets her rifle and brings it to bear, her ranting voice suddenly quieting down to an ice-cold snarl. "... you /dare/ to call us cowards for using guns we HAD to develop to deal with bullshit like the cunt-brained, shit-eating demon that you're riding like the motherfucking village bicycle?"

In the sudden silence, there is only the sound of Ruoumoko mirroring Celicia's motions using Coreweaver... and also the mechanical sound of giant-scaled gun parts that shouldn't exist.

Somewhere, somehow, the Yellow Ant's eyes bug out as he watches the entire molten rock surface of Ruoumoko's chest start rippling, revealing rows upon rows of glinting metal tubes. From within Ogir Place, Cuddles the imprisoned demon lord, empowered by his link to the Yellow Ant, opens his mouth and howls, weakening the fabric between dimensions. Immediately, a horde of small flying demons begin pouring out from the many crevices of Ogir Place, screeching as they close the distance to Ruoumoko.

And Celicia ignores all this. "Bitch," she hisses, her teeth grinding against the cigarette's end so hard that it's cut clean in half. "/This/ is for all those felpowder elven soldiers you've killed."

(cont.)

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>>25023214
She pulls the trigger on her rifle, and the sheer amount of rifle discharges, all scaled for a battle between warring titans, causes a second sun to blossom between Ruoumoko and Ogir Place. Inside Ruoumoko, everyone except Celicia recoils and covers their eyes or ears, almost blinded by the glare and deafened by the noise. No other sound survives the constant roar of artillery being fired- not the short, terrified screams of the flying demons instantly mulched by the crossfire, and certainly not the sound of an entire rock face being absolutely decimated by the barrage.

After an eternity of light and noise, the silence of the sudden cessation hits like a hammer; Ogir Place stumbles backward drunkenly, its front face reduced by multiple layers and reduced to a blasted, chewed-up landscape. Frozen in place, Ruoumoko is virtually wreathed in smoke, its expended and inexplicable gun barrels dropping to the ground like a rain of dead steel.

Lockstock is the first to break the silence, once his ears stop ringing. "... lass," he mutters, his throat dry and his voice hoarse. "What th' hell."

Celicia also remains frozen in place, her face turned away from the dwarf. "I... I don't know," she whispers, her voice strained. "I really don't know. I have no fucking clue, and I am deeply and utterly disturbed by the sheer inanity of what just happened. But you know what?"

(cont.)

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>>25023228
... and then she turns around, her face flushed and her hands clasped to her cheeks, and something not entirely /sane/ glittering in her eyes. "I just... I just realized that I don't care. It doesn't matter that it doesn't make sense. It's totally fine that it doesn't make sense! I finally got to fuck over reality for the very first time, and... and it. It was /ogres/."

And then Celicia giggles- /giggles/, like a high school girl.

For the first time in his long, long life, Lockstock feels absolutely terrified. "S-SO!" he yells hoarsely, clapping his hands to try and desperately change the subject. "What's keeping those ogre lads, I wonder??"

(Cont.)

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>>25023249
its happening

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>>25023249
OKAY, that last set of posts took way too long, so I figure I'll split off the trench roll into its own thing.

In other words, HA HA HA TIME FOR TRENCH ROLL

>***STUPID LUCKY TIME?***
ROLL d100! (dice+1d100 in the email field)

>>25023249
Oh god, I think we broke her.

Rolled 51

>>25023268

I wonder if blorp ever thinks that Ogre quest is too easy.

Rolled 30

>>25023268
I love it.

Rolled 43

>>25023268
'ERE WE GOOOO

Rolled 46

>>25023249
Shit, Cecilia went full yandere on the ogres.

>>25023268
TRENCH ROLL!

Rolled 43

>>25023268
STOOOPID LUCKY!

Rolled 44

>>25023268

THE OGRES BE WITH YOU

Rolled 61

>>25023268
STUPID LUCKY TIME!

Rolled 80

>>25023268
Unlimited OGRE

Rolled 98

>>25023268

Rolled 74

>>25023268
Hahahahaha oh ogres that was awesome

Rolled 33

>>25023268
oh well

Rolled 43

>>25023268
DIVE!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=q5HfDIwNI8w

Rolled 28

>>25023268
For the insanity

>>25023278
Adequate.

Good enough. After our critical success, I really don't think Yellow Ant is in a position to properly defend against us.

Rolled 55

>>25023299
>>25023295
>>25023289
Ha HA

>>25023281
>>25023285
>>25023302
WHAT IS THIS!?

I think the goddess has had time to charge since last thread. Let's.

Rolled 88

>>25023299
>33
>>25023289
>44
>>25023312
>55

Rolled 30

>>25023327
>33 + 55 = 88
>44 x 2 = 88

>>25023281
>>25023285
>>25023302
T-t-t-trips!!?!

>>25023350
This is a momentous occasion.

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>>25023249
>It was /ogres/.

Yes. Yes it was.

>>25023327
CCCC-COMBO
ALL THE OGRE WAY DOWN.

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Rolled 29

>>25023320
>>25023327
>>25023343
>>25023350

Rolled 18

>>25023320

DIS BE OGRES SAWHN

Oh goddess of luck, Blorp, what did you do?
WHAT DID YOU DO!?

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I... I think that 51 was completely adequate

and yet /tg/ dice keeps overkilling

/everything/

>>25023395
Do you realize how rare we get trips this is incredibly even for Ogre Civ Quest.

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Rolled 75

>>25023281
>>25023285
>>25023302

>43+43+43

>>25023289
>>25023299
>>25023312
>>25023327


>33+44+55+88

Its all Ogre now.

>>25023430
>Pic related

I'm so sorry Blorp

>>25023430
It's your fault, Blorp. You started this as an innocent game.

But, in reality, it was a ritual meant to empower some sort of eldritch luck entity. And it's feeding on you.

Dear Ogre Civ Quest,

Stop hogging all the good rolls.

Sincerely,
Every other quest on /tg/

>>25023249
We just broke Celicia, and it feels good.

Rolled 18

>>25023473
It's not so much 'hogging all the good rolls' as it is 'There isn't really a ''bad'' roll'.

Rolled 45

>>25023443

Trips? Where?

Might have the wrong person

>>25023501
Triples
>>25023281
>43
>>25023285
>43
>>25023302
>43
SEE.

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>>25023478
No Anon. She was broken before, we just /fixed/ her.

We will fix all our friends. They will be happy like we are. They will be /Ogerres/.

>>25023545
Are you implying that we have any other agenda than simply caring for our close friends they way any normal person would?

Because I think that you're implying implications Anon.

>>25023574
>Implying being Ogres isn't awesome.
>Implying we don't want what is best for our friends.
>Implying we don't want our friends to shrug off that 'sanity' stuff and be like us.
>Implying we won't give them all hats and officially make them Ogres too.
>Implying implications.

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>>25023648

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5NV6Rdv1a3I

Our new theme song, guys.

Rolled 1

I bailed out of my D&D game early for this.

>begins catching up

>>25023836
>1
You came just in time.

>>25023430
Hey Blorp. You still remember our fast food order, right?

We could definitely all use some junk food after we finish.

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>>25023268
>>25023249
>[X] [TRENCH RUN]
>51 - Adequate
>NUMBERS, NUMBERS EVERYWHERE

(A MINUTE OR SO AGO ... )

"Okay, boys, listen up."

Beastkrumpa Squiggles paces back and forth atop Ruoumoko's right skeleton shoulderpad, addressing the assembled crack squad of patchwings. "Da boss chose me for dis super-important mission dat could have super-big implications for-"

He has to pause for a few moments as the half-vulture, half-hyena creatures gleefully shriek "IMPLYING IMPLICATIONS!" at each other, somehow having picked up the phrase from the dwarves. Squiggles calmly waits for the furor to settle down before continuing.

"... for da course of dis entire war," Squiggles continues, undaunted. "An' I chose you 'cuz you were da best an' da brightest. Da strongest of da bunch. Now, I'm takin' da Big Vulture into da breach, and I will be de-liver-ing da important payload into the smallest of exhaust vents. One hit, an' dis battle will be de-cise-iverly swung in our favor."

The fur-clad ogre levels a stern glare at each of the patchwings in turn. "So you all got some real big missions. Two of 'em, in fact. Da first is: nothin' gets past us to attack da big Ruoumoko, an' nothin' gets past YOU to attack me. An' da second is the most important mission of all..."

The patchwings lean forward expectantly, their cunning eyes glittering with excitement.

"Everyone is comin' back home alive!" Squiggles roars. He vaults onto the back of his own living aircraft, a truly gigantic vulture that shrieks and begins flapping its wings. Looking appropriately heroic, Squiggles points toward the intimidating-looking Ogir Place, a multi-ton behemoth of stone, stone, and ant-possessed demon. "Now, all together! LIFT-"

.. and the Beastkrumpa is rudely interrupted by roughly a trillion rifles going off at once.

(cont.)

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>>25024048
Once sanity reasserts itself, and once the Big Vulture and all the patchwings aren't trying to leg it to the perceived safety of low orbit, Beastkrumpa Squiggles' vision clears- and he finds himself staring down at the sad, sad mess of Ogir Place, no longer as intimidating as it totters around without most of its face.

"... oh," Squiggles says, watching most of his chances at having a heroic victory shrivel up with a sad little poof. With a sigh, he raises a meaty arm anyway. "We still got a job to do here! Take it away, Vultan!"

The lead patchwing, slightly larger than his compatriots, swells up with pride and starts cawing. "Patchwings! Patchwings!" he shrieks, battering the more inattentive of his flock around with his wings. "Dive! DIIIIIIIIVE!!"

As one teeming mass of shrieking, cawing beast-creatures, the patchwings descend toward Ogir Place, with Beastkrumpa Squiggles at the center of their formation. Those few summoned demons fortunate enough to survive Celicia's barrage look up just in time to get savagely and VERY enthusiastically torn to shreds, but by and large, there isn't a whole lot of resistance.

Beastkrumpa Squiggles guides the Big Vulture with his legs, veering him right toward the very top of Ogir Place. Now, where to aim...

>(NO ROLL REQUIRED)
[ ] [DAPHNAIA'S CRATER] There's a hole where that tree used to be- that'll waterlog the whole island!
[ ] [CAVE TO THE CENTER] That hole leads straight down to where Cuddles is- an easy mark!
[ ] [PRECISION STRIKE] Fuck it all, cram it straight down Cuddles' gullet yourself- best way to be sure!
[ ] [WRITE-IN!]

>>25024062
First, turn off the targeting computer on the vulture, it'll just get in the way.

Then [X] [PRECISION STRIKE] Fuck it all, cram it straight down Cuddles' gullet yourself- best way to be sure!

We're Beastkrumpa Squiggles, we can do this.

[ ] [PRECISION STRIKE] Fuck it all, cram it straight down Cuddles' gullet yourself- best way to be sure!
.... would an ogre do anything else?

>>25024062
Is it possible to aim it at the Prophet? I wanna see that cheating fucker get thrown out on his arse and be forced to die in agony.

Rolled 77

>>25024062
>[X] [PRECISION STRIKE] Fuck it all, cram it straight down Cuddles' gullet yourself- best way to be sure!

GO TIME!

>>25024062
Do you have to ask, Blorp?

[PRECISION STRIKE]

>>25024062
[X] [PRECISION STRIKE] Fuck it all, cram it straight down Cuddles' gullet yourself- best way to be sure!

If we're doing this, we're going at it whole-ogre. We're not going to half-ogre this.

"Ogre Cheevios? My Gods, Dwarves, what have you unleashed?"

>>25024124
....AHAHAHAHA EXACTLY WHAT I HOPED WOULD HAPPEN!

>>25024124
Well now, was backing this anyway

>>25024119
Yellow Ant has possessed Cuddles. So if we hit Cuddles, we hit Yellow Ant as well.

Rolled 67

>>25024124
Yutyut!

>>25024156

Then hit Cuddles in his cuddly demon nuts.

>>25024124
No one can refuse this option now.

Blorp. Ask for the roll.

>>25024062
>[x] [CAVE TO THE CENTER] That hole leads straight down to where Cuddles is- an easy mark!

GIVE CUDDLES A BATH!

>>25024124
oh for fucks sake.

On the bright side, we now have a full set.
>>25023299
>33
>>25023289
>44
>>25023312
>55
>>25024124
>77
>>25023327
>88

Damn. All we needed was a 66

>>25024156
How about we give him chinese burns, wet willies and wedgies then till he leaves Ogir Place?

>>25024188
Fuck. We destroyed Blorp's sanity away.

Also, we had an 11 as well. Now all we need is a 22, 66, and 99.....

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>>25024124
>77
>>25024173
i can't call for the roll anymore

/the roll calls for me/

>>25024188
>>25024228
Err.... Guys. What happens if we get them all?

This could be.... Ogres. This could be /very/ Ogres.

>>25024062
[X] [PRECISION STRIKE] Fuck it all, cram it straight down Cuddles' gullet yourself- best way to be sure!

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>>25024270
Sorry Blorp.

>>25024277
We summon the horrifying eldritch embodiment of luck and it devours our sanity as everything becomes OGRE.

This is how we will bring about the apocalypse. We are of the Cult of Fors Fortis Ultimatum.

>>25024336
>We are of the Cult of Fors Fortis Ultimatum.

While I don't know what that is, I wonder what will happen if someone starts worshiping us.

>>25024428
At this point we kinda are gods.

>>25024456
No Gods or Kings.

Only Ogres. And the Boss.

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>>25024062
>>25024124
>[X] [PRECISION STRIKE]
>77 OUT OF NOWHERE

In the time it takes for Beastkrumpa Squiggles to make a decision, it's neatly taken right out of his hands.

There's a high-pitched, vaguely elfy cackle from somewhere within Ruoumoko, and the giant lava elemental-slash-Frankenstein's-mecha closes the distance separating it from the already-reeling Ogir Place. "PLAYTIME IS /OGRE/," Celicia roars gleefully, and Ruoumoko slams its opponent using the hilt of its demon sword, continuing to pound the already-disoriented Yellow Ant in a bout of improvised rifle-whipping...

... and Ogir Place topples over, landing on its back with an earth-shaking BOOM- and the cave entrance leading to Cuddles is now a straight drop down.

Beastkrumpa Squiggles Irwin knows a chance when he sees one.

(cont.)

>>25024664
She's punning, you guys.

I love this new Cecilia.

Rolled 45

>>25024664

Is his guy even going to get a hit in?

>>25024664

. . . Oh no.
Ogre-like respect for the fabric of reality.
And common sense and brains?

Guys, I think we might have just created a monster. A horrible, horrible monster.

We should be proud.

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>>25024664
Tearing off a strip of cloth from his jacket, the ogre blindfolds his vulture mount before the bird knows what hit it- he can't afford any automatic targeting shenanigans from the vulture, it's got to be all manual- and sends the Big Vulture into a steep dive, the blinded bird trusting him and his subtle instructions with its life.

The patchwings peel off, unable or instinctively unwilling to keep up with Beastkrumpa Squiggles' rapidly increasing speed. The cave looms larger and larger, and yet remains frighteningly small as they approach- the ogre makes another snap decision and vaults off his vulture mount. As Beastkrumpa Squiggles hurtles down, he puts two fingers in his mouth and /whistles/.

Something hears him.

There's an agonized shriek from the Yellow Ant as something burrows up from underneath Ogir Place and worms its way INTO the oasis golem, chewing through solid rock as easy as a knife through butter, but there's no time for that as Beastkrumpa Squiggles dives down into the cave, narrowly avoiding bouncing off a wall or two on his way in-

- and, for a brief moment in time, Beastkrumpa Squiggles really can't help but relish the expression on Cuddles' face- Cuddles, entombed in rock, with the demon's skin having taken on a strange yellow hue and a chitinous appearance- right before the ogre slams an Aquifer Pebble straight down the demon's mouth, and a split-second before the largest monster earthworm pulverizes most of the demon's lower body from below.

From outside, Ogir Place jerks once, twice, before water erupts from every crevice at once, almost flooding the desert around them- and Ruoumoko, spliced with way too many conflicting parts to be healthy, stands triumphant over the vanquished remains of its opponent.

There's a beat.

"THAT'S WHAT I FUCKING THOUGHT," Celicia bellows, before collapsing into a senseless heap of overworked elf.

>A BRIEF INTERLUDE
[ ] [BAWSS] The ogre.
[ ] [LOCKSTOCK] The dwarf.
[ ] [UNKNOWN] The challengers.

>>25024749
Dorf time? Dorf time.

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Rolled 54

>>25024664
Damn Cecilia, you scary.

Captcha: secretly wefter

If wefter means crazy, then yes, Cecilia was crazy in secret. It no secret anymore.

>>25024749
[X] [UNKNOWN] The challengers.

>>25024749
>[TAKEOUT]
Where is that damn takeout boy?

>>25024749
>[ ] [LOCKSTOCK] The dwarf.

This will be AMAZING.

>>25024749
[UNKNOWN]

What's up, Yellow Ant? Cuddles?

>>25024749
>[ALL OF THEM]

>>25024785
I don't think we ordered yet. We were supposed to once the meeting started, but we had to post-pone the peace talk to deal with Yellow Ant first.

But now would be a good time to order. Yep.

>>25024785
A good question: where is our takeout anyway?

>>25024749
[X] [UNKNOWN] The challengers.

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>>25024809
>>25024785
Oh, I haven't forgotten about the takeout.

>>25024749
>[X] [ALL THE CHOICES]
Plus time to eat our take-out as our victory meal

>>25024749
Guys, I just had a horrifying idea.

If Ruoumoko is already a minor demigod of Earthquakes, what will have happened now that he's been infused with a massive amount of Ogre magic and differing abilities? Did we just upgrade him to full time god?

>>25024826

Oh cool!

We get to meet Wayne Brady!

>>25024842
No. We made him something better.

We made him into Captain Krumpin'.

>>25024749
>>25024799
>>25024827
BELATEDLY, "all of the choices" can't be a thing this time, mostly because I might call it a night afterward. (The not-chosen choices will be a thing next thread though, in some capacity).

>>25024749
[X] [UNKNOWN] The challengers.

>>25024908

Will there be bad things for following one group over another, or is this just a semi-comedic voyeur thing?

>>25024908
>[UNKNOWN] The challengers.

>>25024908
>[Lockstock]
I wanna see how he reacts to all this, especially when he realizes that there is an entire new level of 'Cheevo's' to aspire to.

>>25024908
Mine here >>25024827
I'll switch it to [Lockstock] thenbleshe nected

>>25024749
>[ ] [LOCKSTOCK] The dwarf.

Poor Lockstock, locked up with crazy elf.

>>25024749
>[ ] [UNKNOWN] The challengers.

>>25024922
I wouldn't think so. We're just getting their thoughts after all this.

The dorfs are probably excited and the Bawss might be ordering us our luncheon right now. Who knows? We will. Once Blorp writes and posts it all.

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>>25024922
Nope! It's more of a voyeur thing.

Though semi-comedic may not be the right word to describe 'em, depending.

>>25024749
>[X] [UNKNOWN] The challengers.

"Told you so."
"Shut up, demon."
"You're no Ogre, I don't have to listen to you."

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>>25024971
... wow, that's certainly a wrong picture

>25024749
>>25024908
>[ ] [LOCKSTOCK] The dwarf.
Dorf time then.

>>25024992
It fits, though. From a certain point of view.

>>25024971

Okay.

Lockstock and fucking watch him react.

>>25024749
[x] [LOCKSTOCK] The dwarf

>>25024971
>>25025016

Oh no wait. I take back my choice.

Use the [UNKNOWN] instead.

Rolled 51

>>25024971
LAWKSTAWK DA DERF!!!

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... actually, looking at the votes and because of how close they are, I'ma going to write both [LOCKSTOCK] and then [UNKNOWN] because they really might flow together

>>25025096
Excellent.

>>25025096

What about the other backlog of shit you'll write?

>>25024738
Does anyone remember the theory from a while back about the Goddess of Luck being a mind-broken, all-powerful Celicia from the future?

Because.... I think that Anon might have had a little inspired madness.

Yep, Ogre powers to fuck with reality and smart enough to understand how much she's fucking with reality... Yep.

One day she's gonna go for a walk through that time portal and... Well, you know the rest.

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>>25025157
End of this session. That's why I'm going to try and end it a little earlier than usual

LET'S SEE HOW WELL THAT PLAN WORKS OUT

>>25025160
So the Ogres created themselves? Sounds just about right.

>>25025160
The Luck Goddess isn't 'real', though. At least, not as a tangible character in this quest.

>>25025190
Of course she is. Blorp even wrote a scene with her.

>>25025227
Outside of the story's "canon".

>>25025242
Says who?

Blorp didn't say that and it didn't contradict anything else in the story.

As far as I can tell, the Goddess of Luck is a real character in this setting.

>>25025272
Blorp did say it.

>>25025272
>>25025227
Eh, I did say it was more of a "what if she was a tangible character" type of story, mostly because I felt that having a Goddess of Luck around would steal too much of the ogres' thunder.

(She was VERY close to being a real character, though, since it was pretty much a last-minute deletion that I posted as an afterthought.)

>>25025299
>She was VERY close to being a real character, though, since it was pretty much a last-minute deletion that I posted as an afterthought.
Oh, didn't catch that.

Not sure that matters though. I think she might be real now.

I think we've just created her.

>>25025299
She can be real without being around. But I like having the nature and degree to which gods exist and influence the world being an unclear thing.

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>>25024749
>[X] [LOCKSTOCK] the dwarf

Gunston Lockstock, minor dwarven prince moonlighting as an expeditionary miner, can't help but feel that he's just had his brain blown about five ways sideways from reality.

... of course, ogres being ogres, he's really got to be more specific than that, but it's hard to encapsulate all the events that just happened into one coherent sentence without sounding like a completely off-his-rocker, screwball, mildly insane /sober/ dwarf. Suffice to say that this is the type of shit that the best legends are made of: those that are ALREADY so outlandish that no listener can tell which parts are true, and which parts are the drunken exaggerations of the storyteller telling it.

... but first things first, Lockstock really doesn't want to die here, and that's looking like a distinct possibility right now.

"Now, lass, calm down," Lockstock says soothingly, doing his level best to stop Celicia from clambering back to her feet. Somehow, despite how fragile and elfy she SHOULD be, it's taking all of the strength in his stocky frame to keep her down, and that's a discrepancy he'd rather not contemplate. "The battle's over, there's nothin' left to destroy. No more breakin' reality like the ogres, right?"

"But you don't understand!" Celicia all but wails. "It was... it was beautiful! No, it was fucking /amazing/! I got to screw the rules, and for once, I didn't have to think about how this shouldn't happen, or how common sense was being destroyed! It was... it was..."

The elf's eyes seem lit by an inner fire. "... power /ogre/whelming." And then she starts giggling again in that mildly worrisome way of hers.

Lockstock can't help but start sweating bullets.

[ ] [AGREE] Maybe if he does, she'll settle down and stop wanting to make bad puns.
[ ] [SCARATONE] Queen Kilkkarak, seriously, a little help here?
[ ] [GUBBINS] PLEASE STOP THE ROBOT I WANNA GET OUT
[ ] [WRITE-IN!]

[ ] [SCARATONE] Queen Kilkkarak, seriously, a little help here?

>>25025438
[][SCARATONE] Let's help Cecilia get her mind back, guys.

>>25025438
>[x] [SCARATONE] Queen Kilkkarak, seriously, a little help here?

YES, we must hear the Queens take on this.

>>25025438
[X] [Scaratone] A chat with someone of the same gender might help calm her down.

Rolled 52

>>25025438
[X] [GROANING] For the love of cheevos, stop making bad puns!

>>25025438
>[ ] [GUBBINS] PLEASE STOP THE ROBOT I WANNA GET OUT

I'LL TRADE YOU A CHEEVO OR TWO IF YOU GET ME OUT

>>25025438
Talk to her, apply dwarfy wisdom to the situation.

"Lass, is this how Bawss would use /ogre/whelming power? Doesn't he always try to talk before resorting to breaking reality? And when he does use it he doesn't abuse it, just the right amount of common sense is thrown out the window.

If you want power like Bawss you gotta be a bit like Bawss, breaking mortal conceptions of reality, sanity, and sense is a big responsibility. You can't always screw the rules, otherwise there's no point in the rules, you have to break them when it's important, and leave them alone when it isn't important.

It's just like cheevos, you only get to break the rules to achieve the really good ones, otherwise you play by the book.

Be like Bawss Celicia, be like Bawss."

>>25025438
Gubbins, Can you toss Celicia out of the robot, fresh air might help her regain her sense of reality.

OH GOD, Celicia has been corrupted by the power of orges we might need some diplomancy to sort her out

>>25025566
>Gubbins stopping the ride.

It's like you don't understand ogre mentality, that just translates to "turn it up to 11" which probably means giant Ruomoko sand surfing into the sunset playing a sick guitar riff on Coreweaver who has transformed from a sword to an axe.

Actually, I kinda waant to see that, can we please?

>>25025584
This is glorious. Sums up Boss Bawss perfectly.

>>25025584
You want to tell her she should mantle the Boss Ogre?

>>25025584
I like this, Celicia needs to be grounded a bit, and who better to ground someone than a dwarf.

Dohoho.

>>25025584
But which edition of the cheevos Lockstock!? Which one!

Also support.