>>25881460
I'm sorry did you ask a question? because all I heard was "Story time".

First off the Orc ship and the locsaddle were the same encounter. My Gm came onto Tg before the campaign aparently and seeked out aid on properly making the ship, counting the amount of Orks on it and how our team was meant to fight it. Our party comes out of the warp our ship "The emporers Justice 42 or Mambo number 5 (Party would constantly fight over the name) was brutally wrecked from our last encounter,roughly 90% of the ship not working sitting duck in space functionality.

A rok comes out of Orbit from a planet we pass our perception check and realise that it wasn't a moon and that it was going to ram us. We quickly gatherd ourselves and all essential crew to the drop pod bay and launched ourselves towards the planet. Our tech-Marine saw fit to let all guns on our ship overcharge and any other systems to do the same.

Upon collision of the Rok these explosions occur and the Rok is destroyed in the process as we land on the planet. At this point our Gm shuts his laptop and goes for a 20 minute break/sanity check.

We land on the planet it being a forest/jungle/swamp world we build shelters for the humans from the remains of the drop pods, somebody remembers to water and feed them I think. After about an hour of messing around we hear some guardsmen fighting off "huge ass lizards" as one guy puts it. The Devastator and myself make it to the destruction and we find three Diablodons.

Devastator falls in the muck and flops his first attack, so it's my turn and I try to compel them. I manage to compel two of the three, and one Diablodon critfails in. I make the one normal failing dons to attack the uncompelled one and I force the critfaailed to let me ride upon it's back.

I now had a Diablodon mount. my next turn I casted avenger on the two fight and the Devastator opens fire on them aswell. Post combat my gm makes me check to see if I tamed the diablodon permenantly. I critpassed. I walk back to camp and try exlpaining why gandalf was riding a dinosaur. After about a day's more time we find that we are on the loksaddle homeworld and that there was an army of them showing up. We fortified the camp awaiting their attack with traps and the like, we also cleared a large section of the forest to stop them.

>>25881940
DM Here (Fuck you, Steve)
It's Loxatl.

When we finally see the loks appear, I fire out two bolts of smite in their general direction while pushed. I Critpassed my check and essentially nuked a large portion of the forest. The battle raged on and eventuall I tried to attack a section of the forest that wasn't destroyed, I got cocky and fired smite pushed. I rolled a 98. I also confimred that a demon came out of the warp in the middle of Camp. A damn Korn Demon shows up. My Gms boner to kill his psyker was raging.

Thankfully the rest of my party had a full turn of combat before that beast made me stop exsisting, the Devastator hits him with a Lazcanon and does some decent damage. Then the Blood/Assault Marine lunges at him from behind while flanking it. Killed it viciously with crits and lightning claws. I manage to survive and my Gm weeps at a missed chance to kill the Psyker.

>>25882023
oh shit it's on now

>>25882164
I'm surprisingly cool with it. I die a little inside each time it happens, but afterwards I go 'okay yeah that was pretty funny'.
I'm still pissed about what he did to my modded Spire Slayer. He's getting to that soon.

Next session comes around and we are only three players due to vacations and fuckery, The assault Marine, the techmarine, and myself the Fuckoff Librarion.

We are on vacation and we take a shore leave with some guard, aproximatly two months after the bullshit with the demon in game. We were three fully armoured marines with wearing stretched out Hawain shirts and sombraros. Life was good, well as good as it gets in 40K.

We hear screaming from the middle of town shortly after drop off and we rush to investigate. We see a fuckoff huge hole in the ground, dead civies, and destroyed building; you know the normal stuff. We keep fucking about until we get a lead letting us know that the Pdf post to the south went silent so we naturally go check it out.

(Note I am at work sorry for the delays)

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Assault Marine here:
On the Daemon Prince. Librarian accidentally summons it, at first the GM thinks it goes right after the summoner and nearly kills the libby (turns out Daemon Princes of Khorne have crazy stats)

Then we point out it enters at the end of the round. Lazcannon does half damage but still leaves it at 69 health.

Then it's my turn, cue doing 7 attacks (4 from traits, and 3 from Righteous Fury mayhem), between that and crits and Slayer of Daemon trait that negates the damage resistence.

Did 70 damage, GM is silent for 5 minutes to calm down, and gives me a Crux Terminatus for beating his melee machine in a single turn of attacks.

>>25882239
Yeah, fack you too Mike.
FUCK THIS CAMPAIGN

>>25882023

Ahahaha

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This thread is getting very good, very fast.

>>25882239
As you fucking deserved, by the sound of it.

>>25882239

Assault Terminator, now?

We find the post and find a gapping hole in the ceiling, realize that isn't natural design we decide to check it out. Dropping in from the roof we ar greated with another hole in the ground, more blood, more bodies, and a new feature some servitors with heavy bolters. Three of the five servitors spring to life and combat starts, One of them manages to hit me with it's bolter does exceptionly well and bring me down to 6 health. The usual destruction which is our party takes place and we clear the room. The tech-marine literally dissasembled one during combat.

We eventually get another lead that the creature causing this mayhem has dug through an apartment complex the underneath of which housed the plasma generators that powerd the entire city. So we tighten our hawain shirts and we go check it out. We get through the hole and we are greated by a room with a good twnty or so odd generators, each one aproximatly 30M tall. We then see the culprit which is a Spire slayer(beefed up by the Gm) which was clawing into one of the generators.

>>25882373
>373
>>>25882239
He's not been in a situation where he had access to a termie suit, but yes.

I just want to Kudos you for rolling with this DM, don't get too stressed out, if the players are having fun they'll remember the game forever

>>25882425
>4
I'LL remember this fucking game forever. It'll haunt my goddamn knightmares and plague my every step.
I don't think I'll ever be able to run Deathwatch again once they're through with me.

>>25882414

His weapon had better be a named Daemon Slayer weapon after that.

We roll for int and the Slayer goes first, it's first idea is to leap towards another generator and slash it (guessed this was to be a trend to prolong the combat) and it fires at us and misses horibly. The other players held their turns noing what I was going to do so I anouced to the Gm..

>I am going to push a spell
>Gm dude you might blow shit up nor can you compel it!
>Oh I know I use Machine curse
>Gm no holds his head and mourns the fact that Librarians exsist.

Machine curse hits the beast and shuts it down completely for 10 full turns, it falls off the generator falling 30M and taking almost 50 points of falling damage. I was knocked out due to psy bullshit for the next four turns yet the other two member casually patched the generators and then commenced to wail on the Spir slayer while it was shut off.

monitorlizard.jpg

This Gm is cool to let us go on with our shennanigans but he has now said that he will ban anymore Librarians due to general bullshit.

The session continues with us taking the Spire Slayer apart and bringing it's corpse back to the inquisitor, our watch captain, and a higher up of the adeptus mechanicus. We are scolded by him for destroying such a beast as he starts to fiddle with it's arms. We do a check for his motive and sure enough he was the faget that unleashed this thing. I compeled him to stand still while our Tech-marine removed his arms and legs(revealing hidden weapons in the process). In one of the legs we discover a teleportation beacon which summoned in in an apostate and a few of his guard. both parties confused of eachothers presence a battle ensues. The watch captain goes first and lamps the apostle thus cutting him in half a simple fight breaks out to mop up the rest of them and then the Tech-marine tries to use his storm bolter for the first time.

>>25882638

>Dismantling the boss encounter

Poor GM.

But I kinda want to see the poor guy as it happened.

This attempt to storm bolt an enemy result in a crit fail, the gm rolled to see where he shot and our Tech marine ended up shooting the Imperial Warmaster in the chest 8 times ( storm bolter making it 16). He survived the first bullet atleast.

Watch captain dispatches the last enemy easily and our assault maring goes batshit and claims he wants to attack our tech. I had to compel check the assault marine and thankfully passed it to keep him in line and to not rip one of our guys apart.

>>25882706
The look on his face was priceless, so were the many bouts of "Fuckyou Steve!"

>>25882465
I would be so okay with that
>>25882373
Weighing the pros of mobility versus the "imma tank" of termie armor.

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>>25882714

>our Tech marine ended up shooting the Imperial Warmaster in the chest 8 times ( storm bolter making it 16). He survived the first bullet atleast.

I now want some Drawfag to make either 3 spec marines in Hawaian shirts or spec marine gandalf riding a diablodon

>>25882714
He killed Warmaster Macaroth by accident

I was upset. Very upset.

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My face every ten seconds running this game.

>>25882783

No fate points?

>>25882819
Not that I know, it was a crit fail. his ballistic skill wouldn't have been good enough

Another good story time adventure would be the session that ocured before the Rok/demon prince fuckery would be how our ship the glorious "Emporahs justice 42/Mambo number 5" got fucked up in the first place.

>>25882819
He missed by four degrees of success on top of crit failing. With my (Sometimes lacking) understanding of the rules, fate points manipulate by 1 degree of success.
Also, give me something. Please. I just want something to blow up in their face.

>>25882862

Fate points allow a reroll, too.

But I totally understand the feeling. Some vindication, at least.

>>25882862
Give them loli SoB.

>>25882844
Steve, I'm seriously tempted to just give the whole story if you want me to take over. Even back when it was just vs Tau you assholes did funny shit.

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>>25882952

Just give us them, storytiems!

>>25882452
Hey, at least they're not the Alpha team/Saturday morning heresy. the one game where a GM threw Deathwatch Nekcrons at an IG squad and the players basicly went through them like a satuday morning cartoon.

Sure wish we'd heard more about them.

>>25882862
Er... pretty sure the Warmaster has Touched by the Fates. Which means he could burn a Fate Point.

All was fine and dandy going through the warp, the ship wearing it's warp condom and all. Our party at the time: Spacewolf Tact, spacewolf Dev, Bloodangel Assault, Lamentor Apoth, ironhand Tech, and Myself a custom class Blood decendant called the silver Dragons as a Librarion.

the Wolves were in the mead hall ith the guards dev was completely unarmed and the tact simply didn't have his helmet, apoth was in med bay, tech near engines, assault in armour killing doors, and myself with the navigators (all players except the first two were armored and and equipped).

All seems fine till the space condom wrips and all hell breaks loose, no pun intended. A warp portal opens up in the navigator bay, all the men in the mead hall start to scream and lurch about(all 500+), apoth and assault were missing from the session so we assumed they didn't notice anything at first, finaly the tech freaks out and realizes shits about to go down.

>>25882985

Bet the dice finally reigned on them and killed the lot.

Amazing that they survived as long as they did.

>>25882981
There are four parts:
> The First Session
> The Pleasure-Cult Mansion, killing the Librarian's former character
> Meeting the Librarian
> Growing to hate the Librarian

Orbital Strike fires on party.

Everyone dies

Retribution Achieved

>>25883015

[x] All.

>>25882862
Ork horde with War Boss at the head, a really big horde.

>>25883057

Gonna need to be a weird boyz at the head, otherwise psychic shenanigans ensure, once more.

Actually, how about Blanka' Boyz?

The wolves run loose, the Dev runs to the armoury and the tact gets to the door and lobs grenades at the quickly deteriating nergle infested bodies. I see some huge ass fuck creature line up and start to lumber through the warp. I then decide to break it to the Gm that I bought the pell compel a session ago.

I make the Nergleites fall over, fight eachother and generally not fuck my face while I spend the next few turns attempting to close it. The dev finally makes it to the armoury just about the same time as I finished my encounter, he finds 4 of the same fat fucks and jumps towards some flamers and lights them up as they were blocking his armour. The techmarine becomes a glorious fuck and shuts off the ships gravity. Nergel is great when no gravity is present.

>>25883015
> The First Session
This actually isn't that full of shenanigans, but needs to be shown for context of how much potential has been lost in the insanity. The party, to begin with, consisted of a Space Wolf Devestator, another Wolf Tactical Marine, Steve's Storm Warden Tactical, a Lamenter Apothecary, Mike's Assault Marine and the Techmarine.
The mission was to retrieve an Old One artifact for an Ordo Xenos inquisitor. It had been left on an agri-world for study, but a Tau fleet that had accidentally gone through the Webway and ended up on the wrong side of the galaxy has started colonizing the planet. They were sent down, and after a series of events that involved explosions and ramming a car through a horde of fire warriors, returned to the Inquisitor with the orb and meeting the second Inquisitor (Ordo Hereticus) in the process. All in all, good session, bit of foreshadowing, etc. Things started to go downhill later, when we finally abandon the Tau arc and pursue the - surprise surprise - rogue inquisitor with his Orb of Plot Device.
So, they ended up in the Sabbat Worlds during the crusade and got deployed to Jago to check some things out. This is when the Pleasure Mansion started.

>>25883057
>>25883122
I actually have hatred orcs aswell

>>25883122

Boyz who are Blanks or actual Blanka Boyz?

>>25883137
> The Pleasure Mansion and Steve's Death
Long story short, they find an abandoned fort filled with bodies that had been raped to death. They go underground and fight off three Daemonettes, then head back up. As they attempt to leave the place, a fuckoff horde of Blood Pact attack. When the Thunderhawk lands, the Techmarine, Apothecary and Steve board it. Steve ends up locked in a swordfight with a stoaway Slaneeshi Champion, being disarmed by a parry. Steve then picks up one of the Champion's spare warp swords - gaining 10 Corruption in the process - and beats the fuck out of the guy.
The Lamenter saw this, and snaps like a fuck along with most of the rest of the party. They eventually kill Steve and toss him out of the leaving thunderhawk for 'heresy'.
Then I made the mistake of telling Steve he could play a Librarian.

Hilarity ensues as four fat nergle fucks float through the air on fire and can't do anything with 5 agility. We all meet up and see if we can apply a new warp condom and get out of there. The tech is the first to arive and finds a Nergle Demon prince syphoning off the ships power hastily shoots it with his mycguiverd flamer doing no damage, shuts the door and waits for the rest of us to show up.

The rest of the party get together the Dev stole some Multimeltas from the armoury and handed one to each of us. The assault marine leaped at the prince and was smacked away, the apoth tries to heal him but it is for naught as the assaults unconcious body floats away due to gravity/plot device.

Fun Fact the apoth wanted to be killed off so he could make a new character for when he returned from vacation. So with him next to the prince our tech marine took the barrel of fuel which he was using for the flamer and rammed it into the chest of the prince and ran off in the opposite direction. I then lamped him with two bolts of smite to the chest doing enough damage to blow up the barrel and kill the Prince dissentegrating the apoth in the process (for the greater good is my motto with the Librarian).

>>25883213
you also fucked up the dodge/parry rules and allowed more than one reaction a turn which eventually lead to the disarming. Although I like the Librarian better.

Aswell as the fact that the Techmarine and I at the time would hammer toss eachother at any enemy.

>>25883213
> Meeting the Librarian
Gentlemen, this is the session where I lost all control. This is the point of no return. This is where I lost it.
...the party, now with a librarian, heads to another fortress on the world to clear a landing zone for the main invasion force. Slaughtering their way through many blood pact, Steve grins and tells me exactly what a pushed Smite does
> Wait a blast radius of how many meters? Oh, fuck.
There goes that encounter. With the wall guns disabled, they now pushed to clear the landing strip. A pair of leman russ tanks are dealt with by the Devestator and another Smite bolt - to my personal hatred - and then they met the 'big event' of the session, a group of four Chaos Marines with Marks.
> I get initiative, I smite targeting the Tzeentch one.
They all take heavy damage. Mike's Assault marine promptly ends up fighting the Slaneeshi and Khornate champions hand-to-hand with his chainswords (Killing them like the jammy bastard he is), where Steve tossed away the Tzeentch champion's bolt of change and proceeded to finish him off. I believe the Devestator or Tech Marine dealt with the Nurgle champion.
...then the Titan came out of the cliffside. What was meant to be a climactic Shadows-of-The-Collosus type romp became
>'I climb in through the groin-gate and then close the warp-gate powering it'
>'How?'
>'I'm a psyker, it should work'
>'Here's all of these negatives'
> 'Pass'd'
That was the first utterance of 'Fuck You, Steve'.

>>25883413
At this point the stories sync up. That's all I have to bring to the table for this, but the campaign continues.
Now with them awaiting trial for just shooting the Warmaster sixteen times.

>>25883413
Fuck you to Cam

>>25883455

Join the Lamenters on their pertinent crusade.

>>25883455
There is also the fantasy campaign you are trying to run to avoid high damage fuckery and I seem to be proving that system wrong by rolling a Dwarven pitfighter who doesn't afraid of anything and lamps people with his pickaxe.

>>25883455
I should point out only the techmarine should be on trial.

I committed no such crime

>>25883875

If he was corrupted, then the rest of you may have been swayed to heresy.

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Shit tg I may be tha/tg/uy

>>25883875

Guilty of associating with heretical individuals.

Who has crusade command, now?

Long suffering GM should totally strip you of your crux terminatus for party conflict.

>>25884009
Man, its k. None of this should be happening. Its k to act accordingly

Is that is for the stories?