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/tg/ - Traditional Games


File: 1381615293628.gif-(137 KB, 698x900, Villain quest.gif)
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Previous thread: http://suptg.thisisnotatrueending.com/archive.html?tags=Washed%20up%20villain%20quest
Character Sheet: http://pastebin.com/a8kFtx4Q
>Someone has noticed your tampering with the forces of death
"Sir"
"What is it intern?"
"A necromancer has surfaced"
"Well I'll be dammed, what his name"
"Well that's the thing, you know those old cartoons"
"What about them?"
>Someone has sworn revenge for your crimes
"I swear to god, I'll get the son of a bitch who did this to you"
"I may be of assistance"
"And who the fuck are you"
"a friend"
>Meanwhile in the backyard of Villainy
You are Dick Vilian Bethany Dastardly the third, and you are free. Your last two days of freedom had been quite productive if you do say so yourself. Currently you are enjoying a fine cup of tea while looking out upon the urban jungle, your fierce animal companion at your side filled with malicious intent, also a hunger for treats. A few moments ago one of the henchmen handed you a newspaper, he seemed quite excited about it. However a groan tells you that your undead anomaly has awoken. Also Mr.fritz wanted to talk to you about business. Not to mention, Fluffy seems to desire walkies. Oh why is your life so hard. You sigh as you take a sip of your rapidly cooling tea
What do you do
[] read the paper
[] Check on The undead girl
[]Talk with Mr.fritz
[] take your fluffy for a walk
[] Multitask, what could go wrong
[] other
>>
>>27707106
perhaps I should start a bit later?
>>
>>27707106
>[] read the paper
It would be inconsiderate to do otherwise. Furthermore, it could be an article about us!

[] Check on The undead girl, improve her
See if we can't turn her into an awakened intelligent undead. Make her a lieutenant and the leader of our undead squad: the skeleton crew.
>>
>>27707179
She seemed rather sentient last night, when she ate the tan fellow
>>
>>27707222
Okay, but can she tell why kids love cinnamon toast crunch?

We may need our own evil breakfast cereal brand.
>>
>>27707245
No one can
It would require several sacrifices most unholy
>>
>>27707258
Do you really think that's even an obstacle for us?
>>
>>27707269
No
but such sacrifices tend to attract the more heroic side of things
>>
Rolled 79

>>27707106
I think that we should train our Corgi into the art of killing and beying loyal to us. Other than that, right now, let's
>[x] Talk with Mr. Fritz
And don't forget to ask him if he read the newspaper!
>>
>>27707309
well it appears we have met an impasse
>>
Rolled 70

>>27707333
Which one? I can't tell what >>27707179 actually wants.
>>
>>27707343
He appears to want to read the paper and check on the corpse
>>
>>27707343
Well, first we read the paper and afterward we go check on the not quite living lady.

Or the not quite dead lady, whatever undead right activists wants.
>>
Rolled 57

>>27707359
I'd say talk to Fritz and then check on the corpse, asking the former what's on the newspaper and always taking our trusty corgi with us. Which I think actually counts as
>[X] Multitask, what could go wrong

Also, according to captcha, a good name to the city: Scarsdale.
>>
>>27707106
I say lets quickly read the paper and then we can talk to Mr. fritz.
>>
Rolled 21

>>27707397
Meh, let's go with this for the sake of speeding up the process
>>
Check the paper first
>>
>>27707397
You decided to read the paper first. Lets see, some kid lost his legs in an accident. Some big wig is under suspicions of robbing a restaurant and tearing up the place. Boring stuff really, except for a short article title "Graveyard Massacre". It isn't very exciting, Though it does mention the fact that every grave appears to be empty. Not a single mention of you in name, You may need to pay a visit to whoever prints this thing.
You get up, irked by this small transgression. You storm inside, followed by your Fluffy. You find Mr. Fritz watching the Tv, Along with the fat man.
"Oh boss" He calls out "look you're on tv".
"Do they refer to me by name, or a mysterious caped man?" you ask.
"The former, and it's only because of the robbery" he answers "Now I've been thinking of ways to draw in some moolah"

"Speak quickly I'm a busy man Fritz" You say looking out a window.

"Well we could start drug trafficking" He says "The way I see it your magic could give us an edge". Some of your former henchmen were drug dealers, you never really dealt with the stuff yourself.

"Or we could offer protection" John says "You know extort the local business for cash, I doubt anyone will say no to man with a living corpse on a leash". A crude method, but effective.

"Or we could do whatever mad scheme you cam think up" Fritz says noticing your expression "Seems to have worked for us so far". Yes, scheming, your specialty.
What do you do
[]These drugs sound profitable
[] Protect the common man, all the while draining away his expenses, I love it
[] Other business (please specify)
[] we'll decided later
>>
>>27707597
>[]These drugs sound profitable
Lets do that. We can also learn magical alchemy and create ultra enhanced drugs.
>>
>>27707597
I really need to start proof reading these thing, I suppose I could just chalk it up to you not being exactly sane
>>
>>27707679
Sanity is overrated.

I've also just realised, do we even have mustache wax on hand?
>>
>>27707702
You have let to go shopping, though it could be in one of your pockets,
>>
Rolled 42

>>27707597
Drug dealing seems profiteable, but in order to destroy every competitor in this city I'd say extortion and murdering of them sounds better. In this case I say:
>[x]Other: Why not both?
We'll see what else we can do later, but for now both of Fritz's ideas can be. Other than that let's check on our living dead damsel?
>>
>>27707597
>[] Other business (please specify)
Try to create gold through alchemy
>>
>>27707597
I don't see why we cannot do both at the same time

Also, an elaborate bank heist
>>
>>27707597
>Make every shop in our territory sell our drugs.
>>
>>27707597
[X]These drugs sound profitable

Not only will this profit us but we can experiment on "enhancing" the drugs with magic.
>>
>>27707730
Thinking about it both is a wonderful idea!
>>
>>27707734
How about this, we learn about alchemy during a disney styled training montage than enhance a batch of drugs in an insance cartoonish musical scene.
>>
>>27707597
As the plan to do both I say we start with offering protection and then we move to take over a rival gang is heavy in the drug trade.

Why start from scratch when you can take over another operation!
>>
I hope we dress our zombies into snappy outfits
>>
>>27707739
Decisions are hard, You never could choose between the freeze ray or the death beam.
"Why not both" You say "simple"

"That seems a bit" Mr. fritz begins

"Ballsy" The fat man finishes for him "and that's the way you earn respect, and money".

"It also gets you killed" John says "But the boss is the boss, I'll tell the boys to start producing, just stay out of the basement will you boss, its a very delicate process"

"And what about the extortion?" you ask.

"I'll let you handle that" Mr. Fritz "Mainly because you tend to be more terrifying than a man with a gun". And with that, your second in command gets up and disapears from view, followed by the sound of a door opening and closing. Well that solves the funding problem.
The fat man is staring at you
What do you do
[] it sounds like the zombie girl is trying to escape
[]Yes henchman number three?
[]Find a buisness to extort roll1d100
[] explore the city
>>
Rolled 1

>>27707849
I like this.

>>27707873
Last thread someone suggested this http://youtu.be/N3CQfvfv1sI to be their theme music. I liked it. By the way, let's check on the undead girl before we do anything else. She can be devouring more of our henchmen.
>>
>>27707597
Do both. Drugs and extortion. Also, start a recruitment campaign.
>>
Rolled 39

>>27707914
>[x]It sounds like the zombie girl is trying to escape
As I thought. Let's check on her. Also, I'm starting to think that sending the fat guy to more "dangerous" jobs would be a wise idea. He seems to be pissed off at us.
>>
Rolled 74

>>27707914
I like that kid.
[] it sounds like the zombie girl is trying to escape
We may want to check on that before she starts chewing on our cooks.
>>
>>27707914
Ask what fatboy wants, check on the zombie girl then find a business to exort
>>
>>27707914
Talk to Henchman No.3 Tell him to start recruitin. Then, get the fuck out. Talk to Zombie girl after that.
>>
>>27707914
>[] explore the city
dog needs walkies
>>
>>27707914
[X] Yes henchman number three?

Also ask his name and then go see how that zombie girl is doing.

Depending on what level of decomp. she is in we "might" be able to dress her up and take her along. We extort a few places and then take over another gang that deals in drugs to safe our boys some time.

Dick Vilian Bethany Dastardly the third gets shit done.
>>
>>27707914
>Yes henchman number three?
>>
>>27707972
"What do you want" you ask the fat man.

"....nothing...sir" He says, his voice sounding mechanical, like someone trying to repress rage.

"Good because I need something of you" You say as you stand up "I need you to recruit new blood, now make haste henchman number three".

"My name is Frankie" He says "can't you at least call me by my name".

"I don't care, and I thought I told you to recruit more members to my cause" You say, lighting in your eyes, quite literally. And with that he runs off, hopefully to do your bidding.

You open the door to the backyard, ignoring the dead grass, and piles of debris. It sickens you really, even more so than the corpse tied to the metal rod in the middle of it. She is still dressed in what she was buried in, a formerly white dress, now covered in blood and dirt. Parts of her have began to rot, but she is still mostly intact, though a chunk of her left arm is missing. Her black hair hangs like swamp weeds to her head, her eyes a dull shade of brown. She is currently trying to remove the chain from around her neck. She seems quite distressed. It also seems someone left her a snack in the form of what you hope is beef.
What do you do
[] try to calm her down
[] observe her for awhile
[] take her somewhere
[] other
>>
>>27708184
Try to calm her

Or maybe use our powers to have her better under control?
>>
>>27708184
Tell her politely that when Dick Vilian Bethany Dastardly the Third ties up a lady he expects them to stay tied up like a good girl, and that she should cease her fruitless attempts to free herself immediately.

It's time for a serious conversation about her future, after all.
>>
>>27708184
>[] take her somewhere
take her and dog for walkies
>>
Rolled 20

>>27708184
>[x] Observe her for a while
>>
>>27708184
Pump her full of magic. Try to regenerate and control her.
>>
>>27708184
>take her somewhere
Take her to a retirement home and let her eat all the old people. Maybe eating old and wise people will make her even more intelligent.
>>
>>27708184
observe for a little while then try to calm her
>>
>>27708301
You're likely right in that eating wise people would make her smarter, but if they were wise, why would they have ended up in a retirement home?
>>
Rolled 10

>>27708184

>>27708294
This.
>>
Rolled 32

rolling for this
>>27708294
>>
>>27708184
Observe and then try to calm down.

We don't need she to try and do something silly like trying to attack us.

Though if she "did" try that we could just try out our magic to control her.
>>
Rolled 60

>>27708294
I wouldn't mind trying that.
>>
>>27708327
I don't know, all their real friends are dead so they moved to a retirement home to try and make friends?
>>
>>27708303
You observe her for a while. She dosen't seem hungry, in fact she seems confused, scared, vulnerable, just like every other woman you've dealt with. Her teeth aren't human, maybe your vile magics twisted them to suit your desired purpose, to rip and tear flesh. She notices you and stops, and stares into your eyes

"W..who are you" She asks

" Dick Vilian Bethany Dastardly the Third" You answer.

"What happened, and why did you tie me?" she asks.

"Because I didn't want you to eat my other henchmen" You answer "and what happened, well I brought you back to the land of the living".

"This is a joke right" She says laughing, or trying to "Ok who put you up to this, Choncho?"

"The tan fellow?" You ask "I do believe he's dead"

"W..what happened to him?!" She asks.

"Well last I saw of him you were attempting to eat him" you answer with a smile. She looks down at herself, and begins to scream in horror. It appears her own appearance has terrified her, perhaps you could mend her flesh and bend her to your will....it looks like the flesh is repairing, you think, its hard to tell with her flailing about like a rabid animal, why do women have to be so difficult
What do you do
[] leave her to come to terms with her condition
[]Try to calm her down, and learn her name
[]try to mend her wounds again roll 1d100
[] take her somewhere
[] other
>>
Rolled 5

>>27708482
>[X]try to mend her wounds again roll 1d100
>>
Rolled 67

>>27708482
>try to mend her wounds again roll 1d100
Naybe that will calm her down, a bit atleast. (could make it worse I guess)
>>
Rolled 56

>>27708482
mend them wounds make her a super undead
>>
Rolled 51

>>27708482
>[]try to mend her wounds again roll 1d100
Turn her into a vision of heaven that will help us spread hell on Earth.
>>
Rolled 42

>>27708482
>[x] Try to mend her wounds again
>>
Rolled 60

>>27708482
>[]try to mend her wounds again roll 1d100
>>
>>27708482
The lack of >>27708261 displeases me. Let's try this again.

Tell her that while Dick Vilian Bethany Dastardly the Third does occasionally appreciate it when the ladies he's tied up scream and flail a bit, that's a reaction meant for a different class of girl, and she needs to calm down so that we can get her in shape to carry out our malevolent will upon the populace.
>>
Rolled 52

>>27708482
Hey, if she is presentable afterward, we could take her to dinner, and not the horrific undead feast kind of dinner.
>>
>>27708582
But... that's the best kind of dinner..
>>
>>27708514
You decide to try and mend her wounds once, more. She stops and looks like she was struck by lightning.
The part of her left arm repairs itself, though how it does so exactly you cannot tell. She looks slightly less rotted than before, though still obviously dead. Once she stops twitching she looks at herself than at you

"What did you?' she asks

"Fixed some of the damage done to you" You answer "Now will you stop screaming and listen to me, I may have something to offer you". She glares at you, her eyes reminding you of a hungry predator.
What do you say
[] you old life has ended, but your new one has just began, obey me, and I'll see to making sure you never rot away
[] You are mine to command, do as I say, or I'll send you back to the abyss
[] lets go for a walk, we'll discuss your future then
[] write in
>>
>>27708622
>[] You are mine to command, do as I say
And I'll fix you up properly, agreed?
>>
>>27708622
A mix of one and two.
>>
Rolled 81

>>27708482
>rolling to mend
if we manage to roll high enough to get her presentable maybe a drawfag would be so kind as to draw her?
>>
Rolled 45

>>27708622
>[x] Let's go for a walk, we'll discuss your future then
But keep her as chained as you can, and take the Nameless Corgi with you
>>
>>27708653
if only you did that earlier
Though she is looking better than before
enough that if she covered certain parts of her body she could hide among the living, until her dark hunger took over again
>>
Rolled 70

>>27708622
>[] you old life has ended, but your new one has just began, obey me, and I'll see to making sure you never rot away
To be fair, its either that or she gets the train.
>>
>>27708635
And if she doesn't... well, I'm certain we can come up with a decidedly less pleasant way to spend her eternal undeath than carrying out our will, hmm? She seems like a lass who would appreciate the finer points of inspiring fear in those who look upon you and demanding that they pander to your whims. We can assure her that she'll find serving at our side the most comfortable of the few choices available to her.
>>
>>27708622
[] you old life has ended, but your new one has just began, obey me, and I'll see to making sure you never rot away
>>
>>27708653
Nothing stops us from trying again later
>>
>>27708622
>you old life has ended, but your new one has just began, obey me, and I'll see to making sure you never rot away

Play on her fears of true death.
>>
>>27708622
Why not all three?

Lets go for a walk and tell her that her old life has ended but now she has a second chance. If she obeys us we will make sure that she will never die again, but if she choses to not obey then we wills simply take control of her body and force her to do what we want. If she proves to be more trouble than she is worth with a flick of our hand she will be nothing more than a corpse once again.
>>
Rolled 78

>>27708622
"How would you like to live forever my dear?"
"As long as I permit your existence in the land of the living, you may still retain your life for as long as you like."
>>
>>27708696
You approach her, ignoring the growls. You place your hand on her shoulder, and stare into her cold dead eyes.
"Your old life has ended, but your new one has just began, obey me, and I'll see to making sure you never rot away" You say to her, your voice like honey. A jolt seems to run through her spine for a moment, but then she seems to get lost in her thoughts

"I mean there's not much work an walking corpse like you can get" You say, your voice as sweet as a caring mother's. She still seems unsure.

"But if you don't wish for me, I could just let you die again, though I don't know what waits for you" You say as you turn away "such a shame to, to give up one with such....potential"

"Wait" She cries out to you, now standing "I'll do whatever you say, I don't want to die again"

"Smart girl" You say.

What do you do
[] unchain her and ask her name
[] take her somewhere in the city
[] "make sure no one sets foot in this yard except for me or my henchmen"
[]other
>>
Rolled 73

>>27708812
>[] take her somewhere in the city
Take her out for shopping and dinner.
>>
>>27708812
You know, I feel villainous, but I don't feel like these updates contain much in the way of mustache-twirling dialogue or even thoughts at all. Where has our flavor gone?
>>
>>27708812
[X] unchain her, ask her name, and take her into the city.

Time to extort some people! Starting with a place to get her some new cloths as we can't have someone who is poorly dressed in our company!
>>
Rolled 11

>>27708839
>>27708857
And take our sweet corgi with us.
>>
Rolled 56

>>27708853
Just wait until we start extorting people.
>>
>>27708853
Well I don't quite know, I'll try to work on this in the next one, its kind of hard to be mustache twirlying when you're trying to calm down a man eating corpse
>>
Rolled 57

>>27708902
We could do it while singing and with a disney song in the background
>>
>>27708902
Nonsense! It'll just a matter of attitude and presentation. Mustache twirling is possible in all things.

Seriously, though, glad to hear you're willing to try to step it up.
>>
Rolled 79

>>27708902
>>27708916
Or Thriller.
>>
>>27708812
>take her somewhere in the city
How about we set her loose in a hospital? Preferebly on a rivaling gangs turf. Hopefully her bloodlust will take the upper hand and hilarity will commense.
>>
>>27708857
"May I ask your name?" You say, bowing
"Matilda Smith" she answers
"....it'll do" you sigh, of you were praying that her name would've been a pun on corpse.
You undo her chain, not bothering to remove the heavy iron band around her neck, that would be to much work, and it suits her quite well. You suppose you could remove it later, but for now she seem at least presentable.......You look at her....her....HER RAGS. She looks like a homeless beggar who got hit by a train, no, she looks even worse than that poor bastard, this simply cannot do.
"Would the late Miss Smith please follow me" You say, barely holding back your rage
Soon you, Fluffy and the corpse are on the streets, heading towards the store you robbed not two days ago. She seems a tad worried at your repeated murmuring of words such as gutter trash and this simply won't do.
You push open the doors, your cape fluttering around you as you march inside. Some of the employees seem to recongize you
what do you do
[] explain you aren't here to rob them today
[] Traaaaaaaaaaain (summon train, may destroy the building)
[]greet them with a smile and continue on your way
[] other
>>
>>27709021
Demand money and clothing for "protection". Tell them to spread the word that in fact, this whole street is under your "protection".
>>
>>27709021
No need to be rude, just take what we need, spook them a little. These people will be our empoyees soon, after all.
>>
Rolled 91

>>27709021
>>27709066
>[x] Greet them with a smile and continue on your way
Nod your hat to them too. Then pick the clothes you judge good and go eat somewhere, I dunno.
>>
>>27709021
Greet with a smile and order them to find this woman some cloths or least we have some more fun in this store.

While some of them do that lets seek out the manager or whoever is incharge of this store so we can work out a "deal".

I'm sure we will be visiting this place alot.
>>
Rolled 71

>>27709021
[]greet them with a smile and continue on your way
then casually walk past them and dress her appropriately
>>
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50 KB
50 KB JPG
>>27708924
We require more puns. That is all we require. That and power...and money...and maybe some more henchmen that don't smell like ripened spam.
>>
Rolled 49

[]greet them with a smile and continue on your way
That lovely not quite alive lady over here need a few clothes suitable for her otherwordly station.
Of course we are not paying for it. You can consider this to be your first payment for your new Bethany & Crew patented protection plan.

Now, we get the clothes or you get the train.


I have an idea, we organise a meeting of all the villains in the city, modern and otherwise. We could then declare our wish to make this city ours and offer them to join us or be crushed by our elegantly evil wingtip.
>>
>>27709021
>[] explain you aren't here to rob them today

Fine gentlemen! I am simply here to attire my new acquis - *ahem* I mean acquaintance here in your finest of threads. I have brought money to pay you with, so do not flee at my grandiosity.
>>
>>27709115
>Now, we get the clothes or you get the train.
nice
>>
>>27709115
This is perfect.
>>
>>27709115
also fuck that Dick Dastardly Bethany the Third rules alone!!!
>>
>>27709115
Good point, i suppose this is a good place to start our racket. Paying them and then asking for thrice the amount to not train their store seems like something we'd do.
>>
Rolled 42

>>27709115
>>27709136
>"This city is all mine now! Bow under my feet or leave forever!"
>"I won't give a step."
>"Oh, you don't need to. The train leaves the station... Now."

Or

>"Last stop before Hell, suckers!"

Or even

>"I am a nice leader, so I'll give you two options: leave forever or die."
>A train can be heard on the distance

Maybe

>"Choo-choo, motherfuckers."
>>
Rolled 48

>>27709181
>>"Choo-choo, motherfuckers."
Reminds me, did me name our corgi yet? I vote for Choo-Choo.

Other possible catchphrases:

> there is no stopping the Dastardly Dick train!

>Have you ever danced with a locomotive in the pale moonlight?

>Ever been supplexed by a train?
>>
I'm going to assume the train is a proper locomotive and not one of those fancy futuristic bullet trains.
>>
Rolled 57

>>27709181
>>27709239

Wait, even better than my penultimate one:
>"I am a nice leader, so I'll give you two options: leave forever or die. But decide quickly, because your train is arriving."

>"You pissed me off. Congratulations, you just won your one way ticket to Hell."

>"I'll ride the gravy train of evil, but you are on my way. Both metaphorically and literally."

>"I'll train you into being a nice undead slave."

>>27709239
>>27709113
>>27708657
I pointed out we didn't, but as of that last post his name is Fluffly. Also I like your first and third one. Though if we use the first I think it should have a reference to Wacky Racers. The two last ones sound like a reference to me, though. Are they?
>>
Rolled 36

>>27709276
Meant to quote >>27709021, not >>27709113

>>27709274
Are there any other kinds of train other than locomotives?
>>
Rolled 51

>>27709274
Bullet train could be an upgrade to summon train.

>>27709276
>"I'll train you into being a nice undead slave."
how about
>I am good at tying the knot with ladies

>The two last ones sound like a reference to me, though. Are they?
I am not sure what you mean here
>>
>>27709078
You take your hat off an tip it to them
"Now, if you peons would so kindly fetch me some clothes for this young lady here that would be suitable her otherworldly station, I may not punish you for your crime of calling the law down on me during my last visit" You say with a smile, they stare at you, then the at the blood covered youth standing beside you. They seem to decide it best not to argue.

"Will you at least be paying this time?" A man with a lisp asks.

"Me, pay?" you say with a laugh "Of couse not, consider this to be your first payment for your new Bethany & Crew patented protection plans, now fetch me you manager, I wish to have words with him about payment for my ever so charitable protection of your store, now we get the clothes or you get the train, am I clear".
Soon your undead damsel is dressed in a rather fashionable, and very covering attire, its classy, its envyable, it covers the bits of her that are falling off, of course the iron band is still visible above the fine shirt and arm covering vest. You no in agreement with these fine people's choice in apparel.

"Now Mr..." A rather scared effeminate looking man begins.

"Dick Vilian Bethany Dastardly the third" You answer as you sip from your cup of tea.

"Where did you get that...nevermind, What exactly would we be getting if we pay for your so called protection" He asks.

"Well the safety of your families, the knowledge that you work for someone far above any station you'll ever acquire" You say with a nice friendly tone "and a lack of trains in you establishment". He looks at the dead girl staring at herself in the mirror, various cowering employees handing her different kinds of shoes, though strangely no heels, hmm.

"Fine" he says rubbing his head "If you can raise the dead I don't want to see what you can do with the living". And with that you shake hands and the deal is sealed.

"You won't regret this decision, unless you betray me" You say as you leave the store
>>
Rolled 40

>>27709305
I meant I think I've heard something similar to "Have you ever danced with a locomotive in the pale moonlight?" and "Ever been supplexed by a train?" before, so I asked you if these were references.

>>27709319
>"What if we don't give you any money?"
>"Then I'll demolish this place and turn it into a train station."
>" ... What?"
>"Choo-choo, motherfuckers."
>>
>>27709319
You admire your new shoes and your rotting companions new attire, sadly they did not carry any dog collars. The sky is grey, looks like rain
What do you.....is that man pointing a gun at you? Now who would have the gall to strike you down, How do you deal with this insult.
[] Strike him down with magic roll1d100 (if so what kind)
[] throw a train at him (summon train)
[] Miss smith would you deal with the trash please roll 1d100
[] other
>>
Rolled 69

>>27709369
[] Miss smith would you deal with the trash please roll 1d100
>>
Rolled 40

>>27709369
>[x] Stare at him menacingly until he dies or go away

I believe this will result in a failure of my part, but it doesn't hurt to try.
>>
Rolled 8

>>27709319
Great, dinner now. Should we treat her to italian, french, korean or chinese cuisine? By cuisine, I mean restaurant workers, of course.

>>27709369
[] Miss smith would you deal with the trash please roll 1d100
Miss Smith, as my new assistant, could I ask you to do some cleaning? The trash needs to be taken out.

>>27709357
Reference to the Joker in Batman and FF6, respectively.
>>
Rolled 96

>>27709369
>Absorb the bullet
>>
Rolled 90

>>27709369
[X] Take control of his mind.
>>
Rolled 73

>>27709422
>>27709429
These went much better than my roll, so I guess I'll go with these.
>>
Rolled 33

>>27709422
something like
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CRhrIH82WwQ
>>
Rolled 76

>>27709422
>>27709429
I think that those rolls are high enough to constitute a double magic effect
>>
Rolled 78

>>27709450
That's just fucking retarded.
I was thinking more MAGICAL SHIELD sort of thing.
>>
Rolled 87

>>27709450
>>27709475
I definetely think he should absorb the bullets but instead of spitting them back at the assailant he should just spit them out into his hand, amke a witty pun and say something like well you certainly are handy with a pistol, I have sue for you and mind control him we certainly have the rolls for it

that or just feed him to miss smith
>>
>>27709429
The Codex Astartes supports this action.
Besides it's probably just fatty being all upset and stuff.
>>
Rolled 7

>>27709516
I agree with this guy, though I think both >>27709422 and >>27709429 are a bit too much. My opinion is that only the first one should go but whatever you guys want.
>>
>>27709422
You stand their pondering how to strike down this fool
*bang*. Well you could throw a train at him, that would save you a trip to the train station.
*bang*. are you could try summoning lightning.
*bang bang*. Though perhaps you could try and control him
*bang bang bang*.
"hmmmm" You look at your feet, it appears he tried to shoot at you but the bullets realized their target and decided against such a thing.
You look at the now terrified young man, and you think of the various ways to embarass him
Dance, you command, and he begins to dno a little jig.
Like a chicken, you add, and he begins squawking and flapping his arms, oh this is most amusing.
What do you do.
[] leave this fool to dance
[] send him away
[] go check on how something is going
[] go somewhere (where to)
[] other (this includes this session's use of summon train)
>>
Rolled 67

>>27709548
make him your mind slave!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
>>
Rolled 54

>>27709548
Just have Miss Smith eat him already.

A lady needs her beauty feast.

Leave some remains as an example of what happens to people who try to shoot you without introducing themselves.
>>
Rolled 3

>>27709548
>[x] Other
Ask the girl if she wants to eat him, and if not I guess... Send him back to whomever sent him and make him tell that person to not fuck with us.
>>
Rolled 54

>>27709548
>Move over and give him a good pat on the head, like the dog he is, and move away with your new assistant and pet.
>>
>>27709548
>Take him into the store, ask if you may use their restroom. Lock him inside, but not alone let Miss Smith join him. Make sure to tap his nose with the cane first, we want him to bleed.
>>
>>27709645
it seems most of you wish to feed him to miss smith, is this correct
>>
Rolled 96

>>27709548
If the youth as a mustache, don't forget to keep it as a trophy.
>>
>>27709597
Good enough for me.
>>
>>27709660
In my case it is, yes.
>>
Rolled 49

>>27709660
This is correct, but she has to be careful to not stain her new outfit.

Blood and various other body fluids stains are really hard to make disappear.
>>
Rolled 49

>>27709660
Why not? But as they said, leave his head or only the face so people will know of us.

>>27709692
Said that for someone who isn't quite alive yet.
>>
Rolled 11

>>27709548
"Miss smith" You say "Would you deal with our new friend over there, make sure to leave his head, I wish for people to know what happens when you shoot at me without first introducing yourself, and be careful not to get blood on your new outfit, those kind people worked ever so hard to choose it for you". Matilda looks at you, her eyes gaining a new life as she walks across the street and grabs the fool and drags him into a alleyway, the screams that follow tell you that he is most certainly dead
>And so his revenge goes unanswered his life ended like the vermin he was
What do you do
[] wait for miss smith to finish her meal
[] explore the city
[] other
also do you think you deserve a new trait/skill
>>
Rolled 53

>>27709840
>also do you think you deserve a new trait/skill
Possibly. Telekinesis perhap? Mind control magic?
>[] explore the city
Ask Miss Smith to meet us back at the lair before leaving.
>>
Rolled 42

>>27709840
>[] wait for miss smith to finish her meal
also do you think you deserve a new trait/skill
no?
>>
Rolled 34

>>27709840
>[x] Other

Tell Miss Smith to leave the head, or at least the face, and then call her for a walk around the city, in search of places of interest, like possible robbery targets, or possible new bases. But mainly, have as a focus the search of a forest or such.

As of new trait/skill, it seems we can pretty much cast any spell on the fly. I guess we should have some skill like that, though it sounds kinda OP. And our villainy should go up a notch, I guess.
>>
Rolled 45

>>27709840
wait and I think that we deserve a trait of intimidation: waves of magical dastardliness radiate from our gloriuos form causing people to more inclined to simply due as we say or cower in fear at our majesty
>>
>>27709907
If you roll high enough yes
so far the only sub skill of magic you have fully unlocked is necromancy. which allows you command of various undead creatures
and I was thinking of adding a vengeful trait
mainly because of that comment in the first thread about how we killed a man for touching our coat
>>
Rolled 12

>>27709946
How about +5 during impulsive actions?
>>
>>27709840
>wait for miss smith to finish her meal
We are a gentleman are we not?

Maybe an aura that intimidate the living, but also boost the morale of the undead?
>>
Rolled 75

>>27709907 (already told her to leave the head)
You decided to wait for Miss Smith to finish her meal, those who can hear the noises coming out of that alley way quickly leave, to avoid listening the crunching, slurping, and smacking
it takes around an hour or two for her to finish, and she walks out of the alley way, seeming a tad more lively than before
"He tastes like sweat, and fear" she says, her mouth covered in blood, and various pieces of meat and bone caught between her teeth. You need to have her carry a handkerchief to wipe the blood from her face, and maybe some floss.
the day is still young, and you doubt someone else will try and end your life today
what do you do
[] explore the city (what do you look for)
[] check on something
[] other
>>
Rolled 12

>>27709907
>>27709946
Well, in the first thread I twice commented for fun that we should get magic powers, ad I rolled two 100s, so we got Necromancy and Train Summoning. Now we just randomly stopped bullets and mind controlled someone, so I guess the randomity is beggining to appear.

As of a Vengeful trait, I think that a trait of Disproportionate Responce trait fits better. For almost every attack option you have added "Summon Train" after all.

>>27710010
I don't think this should be it, but if so, then Deathlust Aura would be a good name, IMO.
>>
>>27710008
what would we call it?
>>
>>27710061
Don't touch my coat.
>>
Rolled 94

>>27710041
other let's send a train through teh headquarters of one of our rivals and then unleash the undead on the survivors
>>
>>27710041
>[] explore the city (what do you look for)
card shop we need calling cards fancy ones and another protection project
>>
Rolled 38

>>27710061
Maybe "Riding the moment" or "no breaks"

>>27710041
Explore the city with Miss Smith, looking for good shops to extort. Maybe a nice restaurant or a jewelry store.
>>
Rolled 15

>>27710041
>[x] Explore the city
Mostly looking for places of interest, such as banks, hidden-in-plain-sight apartments and forests.

>>27710061
>>27710107
Impulsivity? Attack first, think later? Spontaneity special? Devil-may-care?

Also, apparently Impulse Control Disorder is a sociopathic trait...
>>
>>27710041
>explore the city (what do you look for)
A more suitable lair. Preferebly something flashy.
>>
>>27710104
perfect
>>
Rolled 47

>>27710041
[X] explore the city (what do you look for)
We shall look for a carriage for ourselves.
>>
Rolled 4

>>27710105
seconded
>>
Rolled 20

>>27710104
>>27710152
http://youtu.be/otCpCn0l4Wo
>>
>>27710124
"Miss Smith" You ask your undead delight "I must ask, are there any forest nearby".

"Yeah, Most people don't go near it, lots of weird paranormal stuff happens in it, Why?" she answers

"No reason, now what about banks, card shops, and stores in need of protection" You ask.

"Well there's the Mcnalley brothers' bank, a little store owned by a sweet old lady, and you're going to need to be more specific" She says. Hmmmm

"Say do you know where my rivals' lairs are?" you ask " I wish to deal with them"

"Rivals?!" She says sounding shocked "oh what have I got myself into"

"Glory" You answer. She shakes her head and looks rather depressed.
Where do you go
[] bank (who do you bring)
[] card store
[] other store (specify)
[] forest
[] other
>someone has learned your name
>>
>>27710289
>[] card store
gotta get our name out there
>>
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>>27710289
>forest
Perhaps we can learn more secrets. We should let Miss Smith lead the way.
>>
>>27710289
>a little store owned by a sweet old lady
I'm calling it, bitch is magic.
>>
Rolled 74

>>27710289
>[x] Other store
I suddenly want to see our her-I mean, villain's reaction to McDonalds. Or even better, Burguer King.
>>
>>27710289
For a dame who snacks on the living, she seems remarkably straightlaced.
>>
Rolled 54

>>27710289
rival's hq train > than building
>>
Rolled 61

>>27710289
>"Rivals?!" She says sounding shocked "oh what have I got myself into"
A coffin I would say, which I got you of.

>Where do you go
>[] card store

We could get some custom business card. Off-white in color, thick and with a nice watermark.
>>
>>27710374
You do not know where any of your rivals are or even who they are
so you can't call a train upon them
>>
Rolled 30

>>27710289
>[] other
we don't ever use money, robbing a bank would be fun, but mostly pointless.
let's go for a leisurely stroll with a legion of undead, make our rivals come to us.
>>
>>27710289
To the card store, and lets be extra nice to here and only threaten to kill her if a misspelling occurs in your order
>>
Rolled 86

>>27710389
well we could just stop back at the lair and ask any henchman couldn't we
I don't imagine Dick Vilian Bethany Dastardly the third ever got a cellphone did he?
>>
Rolled 84

>>27710380
You briefly think of going for a nice walk through nature, but the card store, it beckons to you

"Miss smith where is this card store" You ask

"Oh please she's a nice lady, she doesn't deserve" She begins before you cut her off.

"I am simply going to get some calling cards made, and that does not require violence" You say "What do you think me, A monster?!".

"Ye...No sir, and its not far from here" She says quickly.
Soon
you stand outside a small building made out of bricks, inside is a small lady carefully placing cards in isles, the building itself is adorned with flowers and other manner of decoration. You open the door and a small bell rings
the old lady with her large glasses turns to you and spots Matilda
"Matilda, dear its been to long" She says as she runs up and embraces your undead servant "My you're so cold, and who's this man with you".
How do you reply
[] pretend to be her lover
[] a friend
[] her master
[] other
>>
>>27710535
Ooh boy, this should be interesting
>>
Rolled 99

>>27710535
a friend
>>
>>27710535
We are her very good friend, helped her out of a bind
>>
Rolled 36

>>27710535
>[x] A friend, who then turns out to be her lover
>>
>>27710535
>a friend, whom need some help with cards.
>>
Rolled 72

>>27710535
>[x] A friend, who then turns out to be her lover, who ends up being her boss.

Now, sweet lady, if you might be so inclined, do you offer custom card making services?

I would very much like a set of bone colored cards with Silian Rail lettering and a small locomotive picture.

If you can provide this to me, I would glady bless your store with my protection for free!

You won't have to fear thugs nor trains passing through your store.
>>
>>27710596
"I am a friend of hers" You say "I helped her get out of a bind". The old lady stares at you, and you at her, and for a moment you are surrounded by horrors unknown, things that would drive lesser men mad, but your will is stronger than any normal man. The old lady blinks and smiles
"Well he is quite the looker" she says "why didn't you tell me about him dear".

"Well granny I uhhh" Matilda begins.

"Because she was embarrassed" you say for her "yes most people would if they had a friend such as I". You twirl your mustache as your ego feeds upon your words like honeysuckle. The old lady locks eyes with you again, and once more you feel a creeping terror of the unknown creeping into your mind, but it quickly retreats . She glares at you for a moment.

"So what will you want" She says her friendly tone returning.

"Cards" you say "You know ones you leave to let people know you've been there".

"So calling cards" She says trying to catch your gaze again.

"Yes" You say "but I prefer the term business cards"

"So any design you have in mind, my young gentleman" She says glaring at you"
infact you have the perfect design already chosen it is
[] a top hat in mustache
[] a train
[] a cane cracking a skull
[] other
>>
Rolled 7

>>27710718
>[] a top hat in mustache
>>
>>27710671
I like your idea
>>
>>27710718
>[] a train with a mustache
>>
>>27710718
>a top hat in mustache riding a train and waving his cane.
>>
>>27710671
This is a great idea for a card.

Captcha: Card aretors

Even captcha thinks so!
>>
Rolled 52

>>27710718
a corgi with a moustache on top of a train!!!!
>>
>>27710671
yea that's the card with silver and black for the lettering
>>
>>27710811
"I would very much like a set of bone colored cards with Silian Rail lettering and a small locomotive picture" You say "and make the letters silver and black if at all possible". The old lady locks eyes with you once more and you hear the cries of a thousand dammed souls, but they are quickly silenced

"They shouldn't take too long" She says "and I'll give you a discount for helping my dear grandaughter". With the last word she glares at you once more, Matilda doesn't seem to notice
Soon
The little old woman hands you the cards, and you hand her some of the cash that was on the gunman's person
"Now we must be going" you say "perhaps we could have tea sometime".

"Well that went better than expected" Miss smith says happily. You look back and see the old woman staring daggers at you, and for a moment, you see the blackness of the void once more, and then its gone, and she's smiling once more
*Calling cards gained*
What do you do
[] explore, where
[] search for something
[] check on someone
[]other
>>
>>27710973
>[X]Other

I say go back to basecamp and do research on this world.
>>
Rolled 26

>>27710973
>[x] Feel hungry, search for food, find a Burguer King
Our associate has fed, so shall we do the same
>>
Rolled 4

>>27710973
other ask Matilda what the fuck is up with her grandmother
>>
>>27710973
>explore, forest
We don't want to meet that old lady in the forest, so let's go now while she's working.

Also, she knows. She knows everything. We better take damn good care of Miss Smith
>>
Rolled 25

>>27711017
we can do this while we walk to do >>27711016
>>
Rolled 95

>>27710973
Look for a luxurious restaurant to extort, in a most fabulous way.

>>27711017
She just doesn't like to see her grand daughter growing. Which is surprising as she was dead.
>>
Rolled 37

>>27711042
no I mean the obvious occult powers she had maybe matilda knows something
>>
Rolled 95

>>27711023
also this isn't a bad idea
>>
Rolled 61

>>27711095
Nonsense. She is just a nice old lady.

Or possibly a powerful witch who can teach us some tricks.
>>
Rolled 1

>>27711119
she's obviously a witch you fucking casual let's ask Matilda about her it can't hurt
>>
>>27711017
"Miss Smith" You say "Your grandmother seemed a bit".

"A bit what?" She asks "a bit to friendly".

"No, something else, a nameless terror when ever I locked eyes with her" You say. Matilda looks at you strangely.

"Maybe it was the guilt as showing an old woman the living corpse of her dear grandaughter?" She suggests.

"Perhaps, but I am not the guilty type" You say "She seemed like a kindred soul".

"I swear If I have to call you grandfather.."Matilda says

"Oh heavens no" you say as your stomach growls.
what do you say
[]which way to the forest
[] Matilda, Fooood
[]Fluffy where do you think we should go
[] other
>>
Rolled 93

>>27711155
>[] Matilda, Fooood
Where to get the most villainous food in town?
>>
Rolled 92

>>27711155
ask fluffy he probably knows best, but we should probably go get food let's go to the forest tomorrow after we have one of the henchmen make sure that the crone is working
>>
>>27711195
I agree with this.
>>
>>27711184
I am soooo tempted to send you to apple bees
>>
>>27711155
Matilda, Fooooood

Capcha Chownit cocoanut

Alright lets get some tropical eats, anyone up for hawaiian barbeque?
>>
>>27711250
You might as well. Damn good stuff.
>>
Rolled 94

>>27711155
>"I swear If I have to call you grandfather.."Matilda says
>"Oh heavens no" you say as your stomach growls.
what do you say
Noooo...oooooo! My hopes, lost. My dreams, shattered. My ship, sunk.

>[x]"Matilda, foooood..."
Meh, I already said what I think multiple times, but if you wanna roll with Applebee's, sure. I have to sleep soon, anyways.
>>
Rolled 82

>>27711250
Then we shall go to this place where apples and bees meet.

If it does not meet our low expectations, we can make this a drug point of trade.
>>
>>27711320
sleep well mystical dice man
>>
>>27711042
That would be a very fine source of income

>>27710973
Search for a good high rise building for our new lair, we have the beginnings of an evil empire but we can't really claim anything until we have a proper lair
>>
Rolled 50

>>27711349
Thank you. When will be the next thread up?
>>
>>27711387
maybe tomorrow
I like to try and start at around 5 pm est
>>
Rolled 72

>>27711321
"Matilda" You moan "foooood"

"and what do you want me to do about it" She asks.

"lead me to a restaurant" You say "Seeing as you already ate, I think I should as well".

"Don't remind me" She says with a shudder "The closest place is apple bees"

"What do they serve there?' you ask.

"Steaks, burgers, you know that sort of thing" She answers.

"Take me there with haste" You say pointing towards the horizon

"What are you?" She asks

"Its for dramatic effect!" you shout

[]do you wish to watch what happens inside this building of apples and bees
[]or do you wish to switch perspectives to see what else is going on, and allow our "hero" his peace in his meal,
[] or do you wish a time skip
>>
>>27711155
[X] Matilda, Fooood
>>
Rolled 74

>>27711462
let's see how the henchman are doing
>>
Rolled 27

>>27711462
[]or do you wish to switch perspectives to see what else is going on, and allow our "hero" his peace in his meal

He may eat in what he considers peace.

Lets see what is happening to the glorious mustache of Mr. Fritz!
>>
>>27711462
Let's see what our henchmen are up to.
>>
Rolled 100

>>27711409
Then I think I'll be once again able to be here. I'm not fully sure though.

>>27711462
>[x]Switch perspective to the poor guy who will have to attend our her-villain
... Okay, fine
>[x]Switch perspective to the fat man, and, if possible, Fritz too
Maybe even a small look at our enemies' doing, without revealing who they are. Like, a guy from our gang being brutally murdered with another one sarcastically saying "Sorry, our boss ordered us to. No bad feelings, right?"
>>
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2.72 MB
2.72 MB GIF
>>27711517
..................
>>
>>27711517
The dice man strikes again!
>>
>>27711517
The legend never ends
>>
>>27711462
>switch perspectives to see what else is going on, and allow our "hero" his peace in his meal,
>>
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158 KB PNG
this could be an interesting pwoer we could get eventually

"summon corgi swarm" enemies will be too mystified by the adorableness of the corgis to stop them from ripping them limb from limb
>>
Rolled 57

>>27711517
Will I keep rolling 100s when I'm not expecting to? For the answer of that question, come for this very same thread tomorrow, at this same /tg/-board, at this same /tg/-site.

It seems I only roll 100 when I don't actually want to or I think won't. And this is problably the worst old Batman cartoon reference one has ever made.

>>27711532
Also that .gif is hilarious. Granted, it might be my sleepyness, but I can't stop hearing a voice saying "The ride never ends! *maniac cackle*"

... I literally spent the last thread trying to think of a Mr. Bones Wild Ride reference to say, but only now I think we could Summon Train at an enemy and say that. Or maybe he survives the first time, only his companions dying, then he comes back and the same thing happens again. And then, on our last encounter, when we are pretending to be okay after he emptied his gun on us:
>"Why won't you die?"
>"Because I cannot." *summons train*
>"Oh, c'mon! Again? Why won't you stop doing that?"
>"Because the ride never ends, my enemy. Well, though I hope this time it really is over for you."

... Sorry, when I'm sleepy I get loquacious.

>>27711739
I remember I made that joke in a RP once and hoped the other players would roll with it. Sadly, they didn't yet, but I think they won't.
>>
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>>27711739
or we could get a power that turned fluffy into a monstrous, huge, fire-breathing corgi

not a good pic though...
>>
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Spoiler Image, 116 KB
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Rolled 92

>>27711780
Am I doing this right?
>>
>>27711517
Oh godammit, What did you do in a past life to end up with these idiots.
"DO YOU WANT TO BLOW US ALL SKY HIGH" You scream as Twitch clumsily fumbles with some rather delicate pieces of machinery
"YOU KNOW WHAT, GET OUT, GO SMOKE SOME CRACK OR SOMETHING". With a smile on his face the dumbass runs up into the house proper. thank god the boss hasn't came to visit let, and thank the lord he hasn't asked you to do anything to dangerous. You rub your forehead.
"JOHN" Frankie screams, nearly giving you a heart attack "The bitch, she's..."
"If you say gone, I can't be held accountable for what I'm going to do to ya" you say.
"well she isn't here" He says "and neither is the boss".
"Ok so there are two possibilities" you say turning to your fat friend on the stairs "One, she escaped and the boss went out to find her, in which case we're dead, or the boss took her outside in which case we'll probably see whatever he does on the news in the morning, I can see it now "Family of four found disemboweled", this is just perfect".

"Well we got some new blood" Frankie said "boss' orders".

"Good" you say, your anxiety wavering, maybe you aren't working for a complete psychopath "I need a smoke". You leave the lab to get some fresh air. You pull a tobacco pipe from your pocket.
"Funny, could've sworn I had cigarettes" You sigh as you light it up and breath in the smoke. You hear screams on the wind, and shake your head
"Godammit boss" you mutter
What do you do
[] gather some men and go see what he's doing now
[] go alone
[] stay here and enjoy your smoke
[] other
>>
>>27711823

[] stay here and enjoy your smoke
>>
Rolled 44

>>27711823
>>27711871
>[x]Stay here and enjoy your smoke
>>
>>27711811
ahahaha
>>
>>27711823
>stay here and enjoy your smoke
nigga you got a job to do

also can we assume everyone in the williams st gang is black or hispanic?
>>
Rolled 51

>>27711823
>[] stay here and enjoy your smoke
Let trouble find us, it always does.
>>
>>27711908
mostly
>>
>>27711823
>stay here and enjoy your smoke
It might be the boss, and we dont want him to catch us not-working.
>>
>>27711823
[X] Stay here and enjoy your smoke.

This only confirms that we have the best henchmen .
>>
Rolled 31

>>27711823
>[]stay here and enjoy your smoke
>>
>>27711939
You look towards the city, as a plume of smoke rises in the air.
"Fuck it" you say as you lean back into the tattered lazy boy chair and stare of towards the forest "besides don't want the boss to catch us not working".
Meanwhile at apple bees
It appears you are being assualted by a demonic creature of some sort, or perhaps a very displeased chef, you can't really tell the difference. You are currently behind the table sipping on your soda pop as Matilda Cowers to your right, to your left is a rather lovely looking waitress, possibly the last one left. a man is thrown over your head as an unearthly roar echoes throughout the building which may or may not be on fire
what do you do
[] try and talk the creature down roll1d100
[] train (summon train)
[] challenge the demon to a duel roll1d100
[] other
>>
>>27711823
Enjoy our smoke
The boss told us to get making drugs therefore our job is to get making drugs

The undead bitch is being handled by the boss one way or the other since why else would he have left?
>>
Rolled 7

>>27712071
Offer the creature a job!
>>
Rolled 36

>>27712111
This.
>>
Rolled 70

>>27712071
>[] try and talk the creature down roll1d100
This is my city you mongrel. I am the only one allowed such behavior. Now cease at once or prepare for a lethal dosage of choo-choo.
>>
>>27712071
Study this creature before we make any hasty decisions
Maybe summon a seat and a cup of tea through our sheer classiness while we consider things
>>
Rolled 38

>>27712111
Why not!
>>
Rolled 23

>>27712138
I revise myself, offer it a job with us, as long as it agrees to wear a top hat and a monocle.
>>
>>27712111
My axe
>>
>>27712164
"Good sir how would you like to join me as my newest henchman" You say standing up to face the beast. It's three times larger than any man you've ever seen, and it is currently eating one of the chefs.

"YOU DARE THINK YOU CAN MAKE ME YOUR SERVANT MORTAL" it screams.

"Not servant, henchman" You say holding out a hand "Henchmen get dental benefits". The beast looks at you for a moment po....
suddenly you're outside, staring at a hole in the building, a you shaped whole, your top hat is.....HE'S GRABBED YOUR TOP HAT, THE FIEND, THIS CANNOT GO UNPUNISHED
Health: hurt
what do you do
[]CHOOOO CHOOOO
[] punish him via magic (how so) roll 1d100
[]Cane duel roll1d100
[] other
>>
Rolled 52

>>27712304
>[] punish him via magic (how so) roll 1d100
Turn him into a more manageable sidekick.
>>
>>27712304
>[]CHOOOO CHOOOO
>>
Rolled 11

>>27712304
>CHOOOO CHOOOO MOTHERFUCKER
I'd like to say, but we can't afford to damage the hat!
Goint with >cane duel
>>
Rolled 99

>>27712328
NO! Our undead waifu is still inside
>>
Rolled 67

>>27712304
We can't CHOO CHOO him, he got our hat. I think we could... You know what, screw this, turn the demon into a corgi.
>>
>>27712071
THIS FOOD IS TERRIBLE SUMMON THE TRAIN!!!
>>
Rolled 59

>>27712358
I agree! A DEMON corgi.
>>
>>27712357
well sir what do you think?
>>
Rolled 97

>>27712304
cane duel ftw
>>
>>27712405
Cane duel is the best option obviously.
>>
>>27712416
and I got a 97 let's do this
>>
Rolled 64

>>27712416
shit yes let's show that demonic scoundrel our dukes.
>>
>>27712416
well this certainly won't due, you raise you cane above your head and charge screaming a guttural battle cry.

"OH WHAT'S THIS THE MORTAL WANTS TO FIGHT" The demon laughs "WELL THEN LET'S *CRASMACK*"
The demon slams into a table, sending food flying through the air
"YOU INSOLENT WORM I'll HAVE YOUR HEAD FOR THIS" He screams, right before you smack him again.

"NO ONE TOUCHES MY HAT" You scream as you charge at him again. he swats at you, but miss as you hit him in the kneecap, bringing him down to your level. He tries to squash you with a fist, but you swat it aside.
what do you do
[] finish HIM (how)
[] Train to the family jewels
[]other
>>
Rolled 33

>>27712574
As I said, screw this, turn him into a corgis.
>>
>>27712574
[] Train to the family jewels
obviously
no one touches my hat
>>
>>27712574
[x] Smack him until he submits.
>>
Rolled 39

>>27712574
>[] Train to the family jewels
from the sky, make a sub way to hell for him leave a card and go back to the boys.
>>
Rolled 23

>>27712574
[x] Smack him until he submits.
>>
>>27712574
Train to the family jewels!
And snappily catch our top hat as he collapses
>>
Rolled 88

>>27712574
>[] other
reclaim hat from brute, ask him to join you or he has a train to catch.
>>
Rolled 89

>>27712646
>>27712707
>>
>>27712797
Now that I could get behind.
>>
>>27712797
>>27712816
Why not both?
>>
Rolled 56

>>27712574
Make him our bitch.
and by bitch I mean henchman.
>>
>>27712717
"Submit to me" You say "If you refuse, You have a train to catch". the demon laughs.
"DO YOU REALLY THINK I'LL BEND MY KNEE TO A MERE MORTAL"*inefficient reputation* He tries to smack you again, but time slows as
You pool your magical might into your hands as you tear back the fabric of reality. The screams of the dammed fill the air. Matilda looks horrifed, the waitress is foaming out of the mouth, the demon is laughing. and then, from the abyss comes a very familiar noise
(http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=d4h4qCJUeiI)
With a flash, a steam train chugs out of the portal, for a moment time seems to freeze as it slams into the demon, his face a grimace of true pain, then it returns to normals, and with a deafaning bang, it crashes through the building, carrying the demon along with it. Your hat floats down and you catch it an return it to its rightful place The smell of smoke and sulfur fill the air as what you can only describe as an eldrich screech fills the air, followed by a dull boom. You look out the whole the train made, the ground smoking as it went along its path, crashing through several buildings, before vanishing, with its passenger. You look around you and pull one of your cards, and drop it away from the flames
"Come Miss Smith" You say as you walk away from the carnage and gore the brute left in his wake.
She follows you, not saying a word, despite the fact you are panting heavily from over exertion
What do you do
[] switch perspectives (with whom)
[] go to your lair
[] explore
[] other
>>
>>27713010
[X] Get to the lair!
>>
Rolled 10

>>27713010
>[] go to your lair
and rest
>>
Rolled 31

>>27713010
>[] other
Lets find the demon carcass. I am sure there is something we can do with a demonic corpse.

Nothing sexual, I assure you.
>>
>>27713010
>go to your lair
Rest is needed, also need to get filled in on the henchmens hopefully good wok.
>>
>>27713105
Demon seem to have vanished with the train. Maybe some "spare parts" can be found?
>>
Rolled 2

>>27713145
Dammit, his head would have made a fine hood ornament.
>>
>>27713161
You don't have a car let
You could use one of your henchmen's cars
>>
>>27713010
Wait, we should keep that waitress. I liked her. We can use her for something suitably villainous.
>>
Rolled 76

>>27713252
Such as serving lukewarm tea or slightly undercooked hot wings?
>>
>>27713252
Have miss smith carry her.
>>27713185
Clearly once we are rested our next target will have to be gas stations and care dealerships.
>>
>>27713119
You decide it would be best return to your lair and rest, and check on how your henchmen's work is coming along. You pay no heed to the various forces of the law that pass you by as you make your way to your home, however temporary.
"How did you do that" Matilda asked "You know, make A FUCKING TRAIN APPEAR OUT OF THIN AIR".

"It was child's play for someone as magnificent as I" You say. She shakes her head and sighs.
Soon
Why is the door to your lair unlocked, someone will be punished for this, you walk inside to find your henchmen, watching tv.
"Aren't you supposed to be working?' You ask
"Boss" Mr. Fritz says "d..did you do this". he points at the screen. On it is the restraunt, under it the words "Terrorist attack via unknown weapon".

"Well one of the holes is my fault" you say "But really the demon is to blame for most of it".

"DEMON" Mr. fritz shouts.

"Yes demon, you can hear" you say "now get back to work"
the sky grows dark, and your eyes weary, you and your fierce companion retire to your chambers.
The next morning, who do you wish to start this day as
[] Dick Vilian Bethany Dastardly the third
[] John Fritz
[] Matilda Smith
>>
Rolled 17

>>27713319
>dealerships
We need a new car, the BADMOBILE!
>>
>>27713252
You can pick her up later
her location will be the hospitable
>>
Rolled 93

>>27713329
>[] Dick Vilian Bethany Dastardly the third
of course
>>
>>27713329

[] Dick Vilian Bethany Dastardly the third
>>
>>27713329
[X] Dick Vilian Bethany Dastardly the third

Time to get us a car!
>>
>>27713329
>Dick Vilian Bethany Dastardly the third
We need dem Rolls Royce
>>
>>27713416
black with silver trim custom limo version with a nickle plated 50 cale by the sun roof
>>
>>27713416
You awaken, your feral beast rousing you from your slumber with licks. You shower, ignoring the sleeping henchmen in the room, and wax your mustache into a twirl. You have a fine breakfast of glorious orange things called chi toes. You and your henchmen do your best to ignore Matilda feeding on some poor sod one of them caught snooping around, judging from his attire he was a servant of the law
the day has just began
What do you do
[] explore
[] Mr. fritz, I desire a vehicle
[] other
>>
>>27713457
>[] Mr. fritz, I desire a vehicle
>>27713455
>>27713416
like this
>>
>>27713457
explore, send a hench to check on the old lady and make sure shes working if so go to the forest wth matilda
>>
>>27713457
>Mr. fritz, I desire a vehicle

We should get the henchmen something proper. Matching cars that everybody in the gang drives.
>>
>>27713457
Hmm.

I suppose we had best dispose of the rest of our rivals. We do still have that ravenous zombie army, do we not?
>>
>>27713494
yep
>>
>>27713489
"Mr. Fritz" You say "I desire a vehicle"

"What kind" He says "I'll send some of the boys to get it"
[] what kind
>>
>>27713524
Well, then, our course of action practically writes itself. To their lairs, that we may commence the assault!
>>
>>27711250
Don't forget to stop by at Starbucks to get the most pretentious drink they have!
>>
>>27713612
this
>>27713416
>>27713455
>>
>>27713612
"something classy"
>>
>>27713612
A truck so we can convert it into a Technical.

>>27713618
Time to take out the Devils and add their drug operation to ours!
>>
>>27713632
"A roll royce" You say "black with a silver trim custom limo version with a nickle plated 50 cale by the sun rood". John fritz stares at you for several minutes
"I...I'll see what I can do" he mutters.

"Good man Mr. fritz" you say

"OOOOOH GOD HELP ME" a voice screams

"That nigga still ain't dead?!" the fat man says "She's been eating his ass for like two hours"

"He is quite the survivor" you say sipping your tea "Anyone wish to check on him?". You stare at the fat man. all of them avoid your stare
"Then its settled, we'll let Miss Smith finish her meal in peace" You say. your henchmen nod in approval.
"Man we should video tap this shit, sell it on the black market" One of them say.
"quite ya dumbass the boss will hear ya" another says
What do you do
[] take someone somewhere
[] ask about rivals
[] search for something (RANDOM EVENT)
[] other
>>
>>27713618
Let's wait to unleash the horde when we raid the "kings" territory.
>>
>>27713759
>[]search for something
>>
>>27713759
[X] Ask about our rivals and if they have made any movements since we took out that one gang.
>>
>>27713759
Commend that business-minded minion on his initiative. He can make the arrangements with Miss Smith personally, and the two of them can split, say, twenty percent of the proceeds. The rest go to us, naturally.

Then we need to gather our forces and move against the Devils.
>>
>>27713825
No matter what we do this should also be said.
>>
>>27713759
I wish I had been able to convince that demonic chap to work for me, it would have continued the nice irony of destroying the gangs with their namesakes

( take down one of our rivals )
>>
>>27713825
"I like your style henchman sixteen" You say causing the man to nearly jump out of his skin "though you'll have to make arrangements with Miss smith personally , and the two of you can split say twenty percent of the proceeds, the rest naturally go to us"

"Now about our rivals, what have they been up to" you ask

"Well what was left of the skeletons' ran off the god knows where" the fat one says "wasn't much of them left, most of them work for us now"

"The devil's have been acting strange, like someone went and fucked their brains up" Sixteen says "maybe they finally rotted their brains".

"AIN'T NO BODY KNOW WHAT THE FUCK THE KING IS DOING" A bearded fellow shouts. You nod and sip your tea
what do you do
[]tonight, the devils go home
[] forest
[]explore
[] other
shall I archive or would one of you like the honor
>>
>>27714008
Okay, I'm blaming the us slip up in the first sentence on us being a crazy fuck
>>
>>27714008
[X] tonight, the devils go home

>inb4 that demon is the leader of the devils
>>
>>27714008
>[]tonight, the devils go home
I think I killed there leader.
>>
>>27714067
"Tonight the devil's go home" You say. your henchmen seem a bit, scared
"I said tonight the devilz go home" You say, angrily. Your henchmen cheer and whoop
"So how are we going to do this boss" the fat one asks "I mean they some mean motherfuckers, lots of em too"
What do you say
[] I'll deal with them
[] follow my lead
[] ....We'll postpone their trip for awhile
>>
>>27714198
Shall we stop here and archive or?
>>
>>27714198
well you know I figured get them in one place.... and attack with a army of undead and have you lot shoot survives... any questions?
>>
>>27714291
Sounds like a good plan to me.
>>
>>27714274
Sounds good. We might want some train support when we take out the devilz anyway.
>>
>>27714310
it feels like only me and you two are left in here
So shall I archive or do one of you want to?
>>
>>27714339
and then another man proves me wrong
Well loosk like we are continuing for a while longer
>>
>>27714310
>>27714334
so we stopping for tonight?
>>
>>27714376
If you want we could stop for the night and leave the planning for tomorrow.
>>
>>27714376
sure go ahead and archive if you want
>>
>>27714376
Otherwise it looks like we will be planning a night raid of ze Devils.
>>
>>27714467
okay its archived
I'll try to get here tomorrow
if you want I will answer any questions you have and discuss theme music with you two fine gentle men
>>
>>27714376
I am here as well but sadly rl is interfering with posting much.
Another day might be better since it seems to have dropped a lot though
>>
>>27714495
Still thinking about adding that one trait we talked about earlier? If we go by that sort of theme we would gain different ones depending on our actions.
>>
>>27714573
the don't touch my coat?
I already added it to the pastebin
along with updating the murder list to include the gun man
>>
>>27714511
How do you feel about how the quest is going currentlu
>>
>>27714605
Ah, I just noticed that.

Well I have to say that I have extremely enjoyed this quest so far.
>>
>>27714668
I think it is going great, it is fun and we are being properly gentlemanly villainous without any remorse

All I wish is that we could have captured that demon so we could make a habit of defeating our enemies with their namesakes
>>
>>27714726
He's still on one of the trains you can summon
he may pop up again
or he might not
though you could also paint Miss Smith red and give her some cheap plastic horns
I recommend this as I find the idea amusing
>>
>>27714721
You should really go into the forest next thread
seriously nothing bad will happen
honest
>>
>>27714753
Or we could summon him ourselves and force him to be our henchman!
>>
>>27714789
Inefficient renown
>>
>>27714767
As the person game master who is running a "Villain" quest I question wheather or not that is true.
>>
>>27714854
Well not bad to me
It may devour most of that quests time though
unless magical dice man makes an appearance
>>
>>27714753
While amusing I have other plans which Miss Smith dresses up as a demon already and wouldn't want to spoil the surprise by using her on such a task as this

Anyway, for it to be proper villainy we must insist that if we are to murder our opponents with demons then with proper demons it must be

Maybe dressing her up as a demon and making it seem like we are incompetent before unleashing the true hell spawn on them would be amusing though
>>
>>27714916
I'll give you that option
however the demons may not take kindly
they could be playing Traps and Tormenters for all you know
>>
>>27714950
Well I was thinking of us spreading from necromancy to demon summoning and binding since the magics would share some similarities and once we have them bound to our will we don't need to care what they think about it

I do like the idea that we now have a demon randomly being carried along on one of our trains so that we might end up with this giant train full of our various enemies that we summoned them upon who drag the new blood in each time to lessen their eternal boredom of being stuck on a train
>>
>>27715032
I may need to use that Idea
though making demons obey you require high renown or nat 100s
>>
>>27715101
We did get a nat 100 earlier..l


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