File: 1390752240110.jpg-(134 KB, 1001x1001, The Shower.jpg)

134 KB JPG

You decide to hop into the shower before nabbing a bite to eat. Mama Kostov didn’t raise no caveman after all. You hop into the shower and take your good sweet time with it, suds foam across the surging muscles of your chest as you pass a washcloth over your naked form, biceps bulging from your earlier exertion. You can’t help but groan as warm water flows in between your tigh- what the fuck. You quickly rinse off and hop back on out of the shower, somewhat perturbed. You hurry away from the homo-erotic shower stall and towards the mess hall.

You walk into the mess hall and quickly scan the menu from a distance. Seems like more tofu, recycled protein products, and veggie mash. Yummy. You take a tray and load up on the glop. It may not be anything close to appetizing, but at least its healthy. You glance around the mess hall, searching for a familiar face. You manage to find several. Elda is sitting alone at a table, picking at her own plate of glop, while Niels, Markos, and Tsukino… wait hang on, not Tsukino… Noriko, are sitting together at their own table. None of them have noticed you yet.

>With Whom Do you sit?

>>29798932
>Niels and Co.
We got to sit by our bro's man

>>29798932
go sit with Elda

>>29798932
fucking lol at that shower, pic very appropriate

seconding >>29799002

>>29798932
Big Russian or Niels, Markos.

>>29799027
Thirding

>>29799039
>>29799027
>>29799012
>>29799002

We seem to be eating with our three fellow rookies. Writing

File: 1390753277124.jpg-(9 KB, 210x251, 1383030556964.jpg)

9 KB JPG

>>29798932
>MFW that shower

>>29799101
we need to introduce Elda to the shower, might lighten her up

>>29799156
No women in the gay shower.

>>29799200
why not, it would help with getting the stick out of her ass

>>29799215
In the gay shower sticks head the opposite direction.

File: 1390754801182.jpg-(392 KB, 1000x1000, Niels.jpg)

392 KB JPG

It’s been at least a few days since you’ve seen Niels, whose own evaluation mission was on some Sinosteel world on the opposite side of Human Space. You’re rather curious how he did. As you walk over to his table Niels looks up at you and waves his hand energetically, his greeting muffled by a mouthful of food. Markos laughs and pats Niels’ back as you sit down. “Now don’t go off and choke Niels, I might have to bill you.”

Niels swallows with a loud gulp and beams at you. “Hey Ivan! How you doing?”

“Well I managed to survive a mission with Elda, so I’d say pretty good. And hey! I got to go toe to toe with a BART.”

That little statement manages to impress the table. Markos and Niels gawp at you and even Noriko raises an eyebrow in surprise. You turn to the Japanese merc and grin, “So, managed to impress you Noriko?”

The woman flushes. It takes you a moment before you realize why. “Hahahaha, sorry ‘bout that. The way your names are ordered always throws me. Tsukino. It’s Tsukino.”

Tsukino inclines her head, despite her pink face a slight smile on her lips. You look back at Niels, who is leaning towards you from across the table. “So, buddy, how’d your first drop go?”

Niels’ face falls somewhat. “It… it went okay. You theory that I might shoot better under stress didn’t pan out though. I knew that one bullseye I got was a fluke.”

“Hmph,” you respond, a surge of pity welling up for your somewhat hapless friend. “I guess all that shouting Cy does is as useless as Markos said.”

Markos nods as he finishes chewing on some tofu. “Fuckin told you so. Should I tack on “It’s my professional opinion as a doctor” to get you to listen to me next time?”

“Eh,” you respond, shrugging before you address Niels once more. “C’mon, we all know you’re a hopeless shot. But it’s the twenty third century for shits sake. You must’ve been able to snag some neat data or something, right?”

Niels looks around and grins as he leans forward. “Yeah, I managed to access the regional executive’s stock portfolio. He’s probably gonna wonder who ordered, like, a third of his assets liquidated.”

“Only a third?”

“Well, I mean, I didn’t want to take his life savings away or anything…”

You snort. Typical Niels. Markos says “I thought the same damn thing, Ivan,” he gives Niels a friendly bump on the arm, “Sinosteel execs are some of the most overcompensated out there. He would’ve been fine.”

“Kostov-san, Ruiz-san, I thought Becker-san behaved quite appropriately during the mission.”

“Oh right!” You say, snapping your fingers. “You dropped with Niels. I was wondering what prompted you to sit with us.”

“Well, technically Kostov-san, you sat with us.”

>Fair point. What do you talk to your buddies about?
>Ask Niels for more details about the mission.
>Ask Tsukino for more details about the mission.
>Ask Markos how his drop went. He got to go down with Valkyrie, the lucky bastard.
>Write in

>>29799440
>>Ask Markos how his drop went. He got to go down with Valkyrie, the lucky bastard.
the lucky bastard

i wanna 'go down' with Valkyrie

>>29799440
>Ask Tsukino for more details about the mission.

inb4 this is like Firefly except the galaxy is run by Japanese people instead of Chinese.

Not that I would mind.

>>29799440
>>ask markos how his drop went.
just want to say I fucking love this quest. So far each installment has been better than the last. Fall guy you are a real cool dude who doesn't afraid of anything.

>>29799506
>>29799491
>>29799476
Alright, it seems like we're leaning towards asking Markos. Writing.

And thank you for your kind words anon, it's very nice to hear you're enjoying things

>>29799440
>“Well, I mean, I didn’t want to take his life savings away or anything…”

How about we brag about our own white knighting and how much of a better person we are? We are truly a paragon of virtue and humility.

“Fair point Tsukino. And speaking of drops,” you look over at Markos, “I hear you got to drop with a certain redhead, you lucky bastard. Shoot anything other than your gun while you were out?”

Markos chuckles and shakes his head. “Funny story, that. Been waiting till you showed up Ivan, figured you’d appreciate it the most.”

“Ooooh storytime. Spit it out, Doc.”

“Yeah, so… Cy and I are headed back to the cryo-berths after we finished with our Limited Liability Solutions drop, alright? And let me be clear, for the entire mission, Valkyrie’s been nothing but professional, right? Just bang bang bang, only comming to talk tactics, stay on my six, all that jazz.”

You have to ask. It would be sinful not to. “So, how was her six?”

“Glorious. Anyway, all business right?”

The three of you nod.

“So me and Cy were talking, and I was just finished saying that maybe her rep is all bullshit or a joke that they play on the rookies, when we almost walk into her. She’s just standing in the middle of the corridor, blocking us from the cryo-berths. And she gives us this once over before saying “Well, now that you’re real mercs…” And then, I shit you not she pulls out a coin and tells us to call it.”

Tsukino’s brow furrows. “Please excuse my confusion, a coin? As in an actual piece of physical currency, Ruiz-san?”

“Yeah, not even kidding Tsukino. An actual coin. So anyway, I call heads, and Cy calls tails, right? And she flips this coin and looks at it. Then she just walks up to us- and hang on cause this is important- this entire time, she’s completely stonefaced. Unreadable. So she walks up to us, and suddenly she’s grinning and, I shit you not, she grabs Cy by the crotch of his suit and leads him off down some other corridor.”

>Options in next post

>>29799806
>Well, what’s your response?
>That lucky motherfucker! [Envious, but jovial about it]
>Eh, good for him, I suppose. [Envious, but trying to play it cool]
>You gotta be fucking joking. Of all the fucking people, Cy? [Envious, and outraged too]
>Just whistle. [Envious, also surprised]
>Write in

>>29799823
>Just whistle. [Envious, also surprised]

>>29799823
>>That lucky motherfucker! [Envious, but jovial about it]

We gotta get on one of her ops

>>29799823
>>That lucky motherfucker! [Envious, but jovial about it]

>>29799823
>Just whistle. [Envious, also surprised]

Because we don't just play cool. We are coll.

>>29799823
>every option is envious
You glorious bastard you

>Just whistle. [Envious, also surprised]

>>29799823
>>Write in
>That lucky bitch! [Envious but gay]

>>29799823
>That lucky motherfucker! [Envious, but jovial about it]

>>29799842
just hope shes on our cruiser if we ever get an op go sideways on us

>>29799806
>>jovial
this is why you always call tails.

>>29799889
>That lucky bitch! [Envious but gay]
Yeah, no, the shower was not that effective, and we're not gay, we're a straight easily excitable merc who's best friend is his tomahawk

>>29799838
>>29799842
>>29799851
>>29799866
>>29799873
>>29799889
>>29799890
>>29799894

Seems like a tie between jovial and whistle. And even if it isn't I'll do a mix of the two. Writing

>>29799823
>Just whistle

>>29799889
second

>>29799939
> And even if it isn't I'll do a mix of the two
You, you are a cool QM.

You lean back on your chair, unleashing a long and loud whistle. The whistle is broken by an escaped chuckle. “Hahaha, that lucky motherfucker. This is exactly why I always call tails. Niels can back me up here.”

Niels nods dumbly, still looking at Markos. There’s a moments pause before Tsukino speaks up. “I wonder what Frazier-sempai would have done if it was Ruiz-san and Acerbi-san, or Ruiz-san and me in her mission team…”

“From what I hear,” you reply around a mouthful of food, “Nothing differently.”

Tsukino blushes very slightly at that. Intrigued you decide to press the issue. “You jelly of Cy, Tsukino?”

“Jelly? I am afraid I do not understand what you mean by that, Kostov-san?”

“Like, uh, jealous. Envious.”

“Oh! Certainly not! I was merely curious, that is all.”

“Uh-huh.”

“H-hey now Ivan,” says Niels, his own face a little pink, “Tsukino isn’t totally used to your sense of humor just yet. Let’s let her acclimate to it a bit first.”

“Hahaha alright then buddy. Seems like you got fond of Tsukino over the mission. Anything fun happen?” you ask with a wink.

>>29800361
>>29800390
It's like I'm really reading Bleach Quest.

Niels smiles and laughs. “Not like that, dumbass. Tsukino just got me out of some pretty tight situations. If she didn’t take out the security team that had me pinned down, I probably wouldn’t have made it out of the room my pod landed in.”

“Christ, Niels,” says Markos. “You and me need to do some practice in the firing range later. I don’t wanna see the guy who recovered all my files from a dead Hard Disk turned into swiss cheese.”

Niels laughs genuinely at that. “Hey now, it was really no bother. You know I’m a sucker for antique tech like that.”

“Becker-san is being too humble,” says Tsukino softly. “When I was scouting ahead, he was the one who deactivated the security systems. I am certain I would have been caught if not for his diligent work.”

“Just cause he’s the best hacker this side of Sol doesn’t mean there isn’t room for improvement,” replies Markos. “I see you’re done eating, Ivan. You coming with us for some target practice?”

You are about to answer when you see Elda get up from her lonely seat at her table and begin to walk out of the mess hall.

>What do you say?
>Sure, I got time to help Niels out. [Self explanatory]
>Maybe later guys, I’ve got something to take care of. [Catch up to Elda]
>Write In

>>29800403
>>Maybe later guys, I’ve got something to take care of. [Catch up to Elda]

File: 1390759296284.png-(41 KB, 300x410, snidelywhiplash.png)

41 KB PNG

>>29800361
Damnit anon, ya ninja'd me... and with the same image too!

>>29800403
>>Maybe later guys, I’ve got something to take care of. [Catch up to Elda]

>>29800403
>>Maybe later guys, I’ve got something to take care of. [Catch up to Elda]

>>29800403
>Help Niels out.
We help our bro's out

>>29800428
>>29800430
whichever one of these is me, let me add, we could ask her for some help training with rifles as we're crap with anything thats not a pistol or AR

>>29800403
Can we invite Elda to come to the range with us?

>>29800403
>Maybe later guys, I’ve got something to take care of. [Catch up to Elda]

>>29800403
>>Write In
see if Elda wants to help out with training Niels

>>29800403
>Sure, I got time to help Niels out. [Self explanatory]
Yeah brotha.

>>29800403
>>Maybe later guys, I’ve got something to take care of. [Catch up to Elda]

>>29800403
>Sure, I got time to help Niels out. [Self explanatory]
Bros first.

>>29800403
>>Sure, I got time to help Niels out. [Self explanatory]
>>Maybe later guys, I’ve got something to take care of. [Catch up to Elda]

Let's get her to help us train Niels. Strength through unity and all that.

>>29800403
>>let's invite Elda guys, I know she seems like a robot but it turns out she's a human being just like us. Well maybe not exactly like us.

Rolled 1, 5, 6, 6 = 18

>>29800403
>>Maybe later guys, I’ve got something to take care of. [Catch up to Elda]
Possibly ask her about the mysterious shower

Alright, it seems like a pretty even split between helping Niels out and talking to Elda. So, as some anons suggested, why not both?

Writing.

>>29800604
I mean she's a sniper. Who better to help someone shoot?

You stand up from your seat partially, leaning on the table with both of your hands. “Markos, you know I’m only passing with assault rifles. But I know some one much better than me,” You glance over in Elda’s direction, and your three comrades follow your gaze.

“Hang on a second now. We don’t need a repeat of basic,” says Markos, a concerned glance over at Niels.

“Hey c’mon now guys. I know it seems like Elda’s a robot, but she’s a human being just like us. Well, maybe not just like us, but you get my drift.”

Before anyone has a chance to protest you turn around and stride after your first dropmate. “Hey Elda!” you shout, waving an arm. “Hey, slow down, it’s Ivan.”

Elda notices your call and stops, turning to face you. “What is it, Kostov?”

“Yeesh. No need to be so short. I was wondering, would you like to come along with me and some of our fellow rookies,” you gesture back at the three people sitting around your table, “and give Niels some pointers with assault rifles?”

Elda pauses for a moment, considering your offer. “I doubt it’ll do any good, but sure, why not.”

You walk back to the lunch table, Elda trailing behind you. Part of you is amused to notice how Niels’ face falls once he realized Elda did deign to lend him her wisdom. Kid needs to nut up a little. It’s not like Elda is HR or anything. Markos looks around the table. “Alright, I’m leaving for the firing range with Niels. You want to come Tsukino?”

Tsukino shakes her head in the negative. “My apologies, Ruiz-san, Becker-san. I must take care of some personal business now. Perhaps at a later date?”

With that, Tsukino gets up and exits the mess hall through one of the doors leading back to the quarters. A beat, then Markos coughs. “Alright then. I’ll lead.”

Markos walks at the head of your little group, leading the way. Niels walks very slightly behind Markos on his left side, the side furthest away from Elda, who follows Markos about five meters behind.

>With whom do you walk and talk?
>Elda?
>Niels and Markos?

>>29800926
why not talk to elda?

>>29800926
>>Elda?
we should get hazard pay for this

>>29800926
>Elda

We'll get her to enjoy being social even if it kills us.
(or at least Niel and Markos)

>>29801018
>>29800981
>>29800962
The Elda's hath spoken. Writing

Rolled 3, 6, 5, 5 = 19

>>29800926
>>Elda?
Lets be slightly less obnoxious than usual.

Lets talk to her sensually.

Time to see if Elda is really a bitch or if she's just introverted.

>>29800981
nah man, she's one of us. Plus it's been my experience: reserved in life, a tiger in the sack.

>>29801323
>reserved in life, a tiger in the sack.
well, tiger in life, tiger in the sack also works, just like Valkyrie has proven

>>29801352
Point well made my good man.

I think I missed something. Who exactly is Valkyrie? Which thread were we first told she exist in?

>>29801590
This one.

>>29801626
But people were talking about her last thread...

>>29801590
this thread is first introduction, even though we've not met her, if you check the QMs pastebin, you can see the character sheet for the prominent figures of the company, including us the 'interns', the main staff, guys like Choi and Maxim the russian, and the senior partners, like Darius and Valkyrie

Wondering if you could claim this as hazard pay, you slow down to match Elda’s pace. The merc glances at you from the corner of her eye before looking straight ahead again. “Something you want?”

“Yeah, just real quick. I know you’re probably the best shot with a rifle in our little group here, and Niels is without question the worst. But please take it easier on him than you did during basic? He isn’t gonna get good if he’d too busy cracking under the pressure.”

“Hmmm? Is this concern I see? Are you two dating? Should I purchase some chocolates for the happy couple?”

You grab Elda’s upper arm and look into her eyes. It feels weird trying to be earnest with this woman after all the barbs the two of you exchanged during basic. “I’m not kidding around, Elda. Niels is going to get fragged one of these days if he doesn’t improve. You’re the best person I can think of to give him some pointers.”

Elda doesn’t shake her arm free this time. Instead she stops walking and looks at you, surprised. “I- I’m the best person you could think of?”

“Well yeah. Don’t think I didn’t notice that covering fire you gave me when I fought the BART. Those guards were dropping like flies.”

You release Elda’s upper arm before she has a chance to shake you off. “Well,” she says, “I suppose I could lend Niels a hand.”

File: 1390763613896.jpg-(113 KB, 600x415, Clerkbot.jpg)

113 KB JPG

“I’m glad. Just, no tears this time, okay? That was embarrassing for everyone.”

Elda merely shrugs before striding on ahead to catch up with Markos and Niels. You hurry after her. Another few minutes of walking and you all arrive at the Range, a cavernous natural hollow in the asteroid that the Brick was built around. Cardboard cutouts of human beings are stacked high against the wall of lobby, where a clerkbot stands behind a bulletproof glass wall, ready to dispense weapons and ammunition to any who request it. Already, Niels and Markos have retrieved M24s and several magazines. Elda steps forward, the simple pixel face of the clerkbot turning into a welcoming smile. “An M24 and ten mags,” says Elda, cutting the clerkbot off before it can say anything. She retrieves her gun, magazines, and ear protectors from a dispenser, and walks off to stand near the entrance of the firing range. You walk up to the clerkbot’s alcove. “Hello sir,” it beeps, “What can this unit, EDDI-24, provide for you today?”

>Well, what gun do you want to practice with?
>M24 assault rifle
>Model 223 revolver
>OMP submachine gun
>Anything else I offered as a weapons choice during chargen

>>29801816
>M24 assault rifle

>>29801816
>M24 assault rifle
It's assault rife practice today.

>>29801816
>OMP submachine gun

>>29801816
>>Anything else I offered as a weapons choice during chargen
>Shotguns
we're a CQC master, makes sense we should use one well

>>29801816
>Model 223 revolver

>>29801816
>>Model 223 revolver

>>29801816
>>Model 223 revolver

>>29801816
>M24 assault rifle
Copy Eldas pointers.

>>29801816
I'll second >>29801851

We're tier 2 in handguns, so we're good with them, and ARs are tier 1, so we don't get negative modifiers with them, but shotguns, we are at tier 0 with, we need some practice

>>29801816
>M24 assault rifle
This training session is about Niels, so we might as well follow suit

>>29801878
Yay for shotguns, because it fits the cqc theme, and is also badass.

maybe an AR in one hand and the 223 in the other, then we can practice shotguns after we either do awesomely, or fuck it up and embarass ourselves

>>29801847
seconded

>>29801898
Shotguns are the classiest weapons.
Versatile too depending on what ammo you use.

>>29801816
>>M24 assault rifle

>>29801850
Changing to this: >>29801929

>>29801878
>>29801953

Why would we ever need a shotgun for anything. Our revolver is sufficiently badass enough to put anything down at short range and our AR handles mid-long. Why would we take a redundant short range weapon skill?

>>29801965
Our revolver is great against mooks but we need something with a bit more bang for things like BARTs that we can't run up to and hit in the face.

Alright, lotta votes there. I think the M24 won in the end though.

Writing.

>>29801965
because our revolver is a low volume of fire weapon with limited ammunition, and the shotguns we can use can take smart ammunition and other explosive fun stuff, very versatile and breaching and fucking up cover, and all round really fucking good and short-medium range

when you get into a gunfight, the saying is; 2 guns are 1, and 1 gun is none

ALWAYS have a backup

>>29801965
We don't. There's a reason why shotguns aren't used in the military for anything other than door breaching anymore. And they're shit against body armor.

>>29801984
Bad news buddy, you need to run up and shoot in the face for shotguns to be effective too.

>>29802007
I am loathe to follow any saying which do not follow proper mathematics.

>>29802012
>why shotguns aren't used in the military
we ain't in the military, and we ain't fighting the fights a military would, we're much more personal, much closer distances, much smaller numbers

all the thigns where a shotgun is a good idea

>>29802038
and I bet you believe you could take one in the face from 20 meters too?

>>29802040
maths does not come into it, its about contingencies and making sure you come out alive and the other guys does not, if you fuck up or our pod fucks up and we lose a gun in a fight or a crash, then what?

>>29802125
If I were in a fucking robot suit, sure.

>>29802125
>then what?

Then unless you suppose we will somehow find obtain a shotgun instead of any other weapons regardless of our skill level there is no point. You've just pointed out a flaw in your own argument.

>>29802012
Shotguns are the preferred heavy-duty weaponry for police and intervention teams across the world, they're easy to use, are intimidating and pack a punch.

>>29802007
Our backup would be our assault rifle. Rifle for long-med range, handgun for close. Also, I'm sure the AR has some interesting ammo choices as well.

>>29801984
>Implying we can't run up and hit BARTs in the face
Did you even read the previous threads?

>>29802205
The police generally don't go up against armed and armored mercenaries. Besides, we already have a CQC weapon and I don't want to be crippled by overspecialization.

>>29802207
sounds like we'd make a kickass pointman

>>29802207
I wonder if theres some sort of clip that can be attached to the revolver to increase our ammo capacity. I imagine the shot fires from the top of the cylinder, if the magazine fed into the bottom of the cylinder it shouldnt be a big issue. At the very least it could give us 12 rounds instead of 6

>>29802425
that entire post is all sorts of wrong, unless you mean some sort of chain gun handgun, which is impractical and stupid

we can just get bigger cylinders to hold more rounds, or harder hitting, better and yet smaller rounds that we can have more of in the same size cylinder

>>29802425
At that point it would be easier to get an whole new revolver with the larger cylinder or a semi auto that shoots a comparable round.

You pause for a moment. The MPSE 2093 looks mighty tempting, with its brutal and utilitarian design that just screams “I am here to ruin people’s day.” However, this trip to the range is about Niels, and you can always come back later. You pause, then say “An M24 and ten mags, my good droid.”

There is a delay as the clerkbot leaves to retrieve your requested munitions. It eventually returns, placing the items on it’s side of the dispenser. “That will be 375 credits, sir.”

You nod and wave your credit chit near a scanner built next to the clerkbot’s window.

-375 credits

Amount in Checking: 22,668 credits

The dispenser clangs open, revealing an M24, ten mags and some ear protection. You grab the equipment out of the dispenser and join your comrades by the door to the firing range. You all slip on the noise cancelling headsets and your e-glasses before entering the cavernous firing range.

The room is huge, with rough grey walls covered in swirls of luminescent moss. In the distance, a maintenance drone sprays a mist of nutrients on the moss. Markos yawns a little and opens a group chat between the four of you.

“Ready to go?” he asks.

>>29802425
the only reason you'd ever modify a revolving receiver is for high ROF, like a rotary canon or mini gun, on a powerful handgun, thats just wasteful and stupid

Everyone concurs, and Markos accesses the firing range’s drone network. An incredibly tiny drone flits out into the firing range about twenty meters away, one of the cardboard cut outs hanging from it’s clamps.

“First thing is first, Niels,” Elda announces over the chat. “I want to see your form when you bring the rifle to firing position. Do that.”

Niels nods, and jerks the M24 up to his shoulder. Or rather, he jerks the M24 up to his chest. Elda sighs and shakes her head. You are inclined to agree with her. Niels quickly realizes what he’s done wrong and places the stock against his shoulder.

“Alright Niels, take a few burst shots at the cutout.”

Niels complies, and fires his M24. Three shots exit the barrel, which is good. Last time, he forgot to switch from safe to burst. It was an excruciating five minutes, waiting for him to figure out why the gun was not working. However, while Niels may have been on the correct firing mode, he completely fails to control the recoil. The first shot misses the cutout by a few centimeters. The next two scrape the ceiling.

>What advice do you give Niels?

>>29802425
So basically a Dardick?

>>29802567
Yep. That was the concept I was thinking of.

>>29802556
teach him ToB or thumb-over-bore, get that stock right into his shoulder, get his stance properly square to the target, arms pushing the gun out but not straining against it, and teach him to get a good cheek rest to keep the rifle and his head in place and confortable

>>29802556
>>What advice do you give Niels?
"Hand in your man card."
Then push him down and grind his face with our boot.
Make sure to smile.

Don't do this.

>>29802556
Why do you forget the basic steps?

Hold up your gun in the correct stance.
Turn off safety.
Aim and brace for recoil.
Pull trigger.
Let go of trigger.

Not much to it.

>>29802556
Kick him in the back of his knees (he's probably having them locked), tell him to plant his feet wider apart and then >>29802599 this.

>>29802647
>Kick him in the back of his knees (he's probably having them locked)
Yeah, feet shoulder width apart, square to the target, knees bent, bend forward at the waist and keep the upper body square to the target, once he's got a good stance, we can build on it from there

>>29802647
>>29802616
>>29802611
>>29802599

Good advice anons. Writing

I'm basically a Niels when it comes to firearms, so your input does more good than just helping out a fictional merc

>>>29802611 (You)
>Good advice anons. Writing
SG pls.
Th-that wasn't a serious suggestion.
Pls, don't break Niels.

>>29802755
I'll second not-breaking Niels.

File: 1390766540965.png-(451 KB, 687x387, Doom Rand Paul.png)

451 KB PNG

>>29802755
TOO LATE

IT'S ALREADY HAPPENING

If Shadow Master has Ron Paul tier happenings, mine are Rand Paul tier

Also, I was kidding. We're not beating up our little buddy.

>>29802835
Beating up your little buddy is nothing to be ashamed of. Every boy does it at some point, it's perfectly natural.

>>29803111
we're going to let Valkyrie do that first, then we can start beating him up

Before you can say anything, Elda says, “Niels, I need you to take your finger off of the trigger and switch to safe. Keep your current stance.”

Once Niels confirms that the gun is in fact safe, Elda places her hands on his shoulders and gives him a quick kick in the back of his knees. “Knees are locked. You need to keep them bent. Feet shoulder width apart. At least you’re facing the target head on this time.”

Markos steps forward after Elda finishes correcting Niels and gently moves his hand off of the magazine and forward onto the grip. “Niels, thumb over the bore, don’t try to do a vertical foregrip if there isn’t the furniture for it.”

Vaguely irritated that your comrades already took all of the good advice, you walk forward, determined to help in some way. You gently tilt Niel’s head until it’s resting on the gun. “It’ll help you aim if you’re actually looking down the barrel, Niels.”

Pleased with your collective handiwork, the three of you step back from Niels. “Alright Niels, try again.”

Niels takes another shot. The rounds aren’t grouped properly, but at least two out of three manage to hit the cut out this time. You figure that’s a pretty good start. Work on making them fatal hits later. As Niels continues to take slow measured shots at the cut out three more target drones fly out, bearing cardboard cutouts. One of the Drone’s opens a comm link with you, querying what sort of evasion protocols it should use.

>Stationary [Low DC]
>Back and forth movement [Medium DC]
>Moderately fast, un-patterned movement [Medium-High DC]
>Evasion Pattern Delta [You will not pass this]

>>29803217
>>Back and forth movement [Medium DC]

>>29803217
>Evasion Pattern Delta [You will not pass this]
You said that if we roll max, we can pass any test.
My body is ready.

>>29803295
>>29803295
Please, do not tempt the dice.

>>29803217
>>Back and forth movement [Medium DC]

>>29803217
>Back and forth movement [Medium DC]

>>29803217
>Back and forth movement [Medium DC]
lets focus on training and not punishment

>>29803217
>Back and forth movement [Medium DC]

>>29803217
>Back and forth movement [Medium DC]

Alright, Just need some rolls real quick.

I'm saying... about four or five rolls of 3d10

Rolled 5, 4, 4 = 13

>>29803383

Rolled 6, 8, 4 = 18

>>29803383
You got them.

Rolled 1, 9, 4 = 14

>>29803383

Rolled 9, 4, 4 = 17

>>29803383

Rolled 5, 6, 7 = 18

>>29803383
ere we go

Rolled 7, 6, 9 = 22

>>29803383

Although you’re curious what Evasion Pattern Delta entails, you decide to keep things within the realm of possibility, and settle on a simply back and forth movement pattern. The drone begins to circle around. You inhale, exhale, and pull the trigger. Your first burst goes a bit wide, but you’re used to that. For whatever reason you always have trouble lining up the first shot. The next one hits, three small holes opening in the chest. You fail to lead the target correctly on your third burst, and they whiff past the target silhouette.

Grumbling to yourself, you renew your grip on the M24, and send the next three bursts target-wards. You’re pleased to see a nice grouping right in the silhouette’s head on the last burst.

You look around. Markos’ drone is engaged in the same evasion pattern as your own, although he seems to have a had a bit more luck than you in actually hitting the damn thing. Niels is still whiffing a substantial portion of his shots at the stationary target. Elda’s drone is flitting about randomly, the cutout occasionally flapping backwards as another grouping strikes home.

You empty two magazines into the cardboard cutout, hitting a respectable number of shots. Eventually, you stop your drone and order it to grab a new cutout. You look around to see that Elda and Markos have stopped firing as well, waiting on new cutouts Niels, on the other hand, is still sending rounds downrange, his normally pleasant expression furious.

>Do you:
>Ask Niels what’s bugging him
>Let him shoot the anger out
>Write In

>ask niels
why am I so lateeee

>>29803800
>>Ask Niels what’s bugging him

>>29803800
Let him shoot his anger out then ask him whats wrong.

>>29803800
Ask.

Rolled 1, 3, 4 = 8

>>29803800
>>Let him shoot the anger out
What I know of guys indicates they need to let off steam before they're approachable.

>>29803800
>>Let him shoot the anger out
Leave him alone for now. He's just mad that he sucks.

Seems like we'll let Niels Violently hash his issues out before approaching him

>>29803917
...Elda pls.

You decide that it would be best if Neils isn’t operating a live weapon when you decide to bother him. You wait patiently until he finishes with his current magazine before you start to approach him. He already has another one loaded before you can reach him, however, and he continues to shoot at the target, scowl deepening. From this angle, you can clearly see what bug is up Niels’ butt. Even with a stationary target, most of Niels’ shots are whiffing. You wait until the new mag clanks onto the floor before tapping your inept friend on the shoulder. Niels turns to face you, almost snarling.

“Hey Niels. You’re not gonna hit anything if you're shaking with rage like that. Doesn’t make for a stable platform, yeah?”

Niels lips purse and he spits out “Fucking easy for you to say, you shoot like you’ve been possessed by the ghost of Michael J. Fox.”

As per usual, Niels’ historical references pass you by. You figure that whoever this Michael J. Fox character was, he wasn’t a good shot. “Hey Niels, its fine. Nobody gets good at shooting in one trip down to the range.”

“Yeah, and that’d be nice if this was my first trip to the range, instead of my thousand and first. I fucking suck. God knows why I became a merc.”

>What do you say in response to your depressive friend?
>Hey man, let’s just come back at this another day and get a drink. [Give Up for Today]
>Sure you suck. That’s why we’re trying to get you better. [Honesty]
>Niels, you have plenty of other skills that I’d kill for, how many credits did you fleece from that executive? [Redirection]
>You don’t suck Niels. [Lie]
>Say Nothing [Say Nothing]
>Write In

>>29804415
>Sure you suck. That’s why we’re trying to get you better. [Honesty]
>Niels, you have plenty of other skills that I’d kill for, how many credits did you fleece from that executive? [Redirection]

Can we combo these?

>>29804415
>>Sure you suck. That’s why we’re trying to get you better. [Honesty]

"And no matter what, I'll help you with this until you become a bloody marksman."

>>29804415
>Niels, you have plenty of other skills that I’d kill for, how many credits did you fleece from that executive? [Redirection]

>>29804486
This.

>>29804415
>Sure you suck. That’s why we’re trying to get you better. [Honesty]
Stay with him this time, don't just tell him what to do. Have him repeat the same thing over and over again. Let him take a short or burst, look at what he did right and/or wrong and adjust until he get's it down. Then move on to something more advanced.

>>29804415
>>Sure you suck. That’s why we’re trying to get you better. [Honesty]
>>Niels, you have plenty of other skills that I’d kill for, how many credits did you fleece from that executive? [Redirection]

>>29804415
>Sure you suck. That’s why we’re trying to get you better. [Honesty]
We're friends and when a friend has difficulty with something you help him out.
Now I won't let you give up, you have the potential to be a great Merc, I mean just how many credits did you fleece from that executive?
You've proven you have the smarts to make it here and with a lot of focus and determination you'll be shooting like the best of us

>>29804415
>niels, do you think I was born this good? you must train to pefection,hell;even to half-suck you must train.Have you seen me use a shotgun?

>>29804595
I mean, don't just tell him how to do something and then leave him at it, not knowing what he's doing right or wrong or how to adjust.

>>29804415
>>Sure you suck. That’s why we’re trying to get you better. [Honesty]
>>Niels, you have plenty of other skills that I’d kill for, how many credits did you fleece from that executive? [Redirection]

>>29804634
>>29804635
I like both of these

Alright, doing a mix of posted replies. Going to include [Honesty] and [Redirection] responses.

Writing.

>>29804595
>>29804652
But anon, my math teachers all told me that you're supposed to let them do it wrong one hundred times before you tell them they're messing up!

>>29804415
>>redirect
that's why we work in teams, to cover each others weaknesses.

>>29804415
>>Sure you suck. That’s why we’re trying to get you better. [Honesty]
>Niels, you have plenty of other skills that I’d kill for, how many credits did you fleece from that executive? [Redirection]

did time stop?

>>29805563
nope

>>29805548
he can take as much time as he wants with the quality hes been delivering

“Listen, Niels,” you say, placing a hand on his shoulder, “Sure you suck. That’s why we’re all here man. We’re trying to get you better, cause we’re friends. I’m not about to let my friend give up, especially when he has the potential to be a great merc. I mean, how many credits did you fleece from the executive?”

The scowl on Niels face drops, replaced by an embarrassed grin. “I mean… maybe 140,000 or so?”

Markos appears behind Niels, gawping at the merc. “Jesus. Niels, holy shit,” Markos swear when he can’t think of anything to say. “You just out earned literally every other rookie in your very first mission. I mean, if a merc is a soldier of fortune, then by that logic you’re the best among us.”

You nod vigorously in agreement. “Yeah, c’mon man. I’m not even that good with the AR, and that was the result of months of training. Just imagine how well you’ll be doing with a bit of practice.”

Before either of you can say anything more, Elda walks up and says, “Niels. Aim down range at the target. And send me a camera feed from your e-glasses.”

>>29805616
I aggree, just worried, he doesn't usually take this long...

Niels complies. Elda immediately tuts her tongue. “Niels, your sight picture is off. They aren’t aligned correctly.”

Elda grabs Niels’ gun and firmly shifts his hold on it slightly. “That’s what it’s supposed to look like. I want you to practice bringing the M24 to firing position until you’re consistently bringing the sights into correct alignment.”

You and Markos step back and Niels brings his gun up under Elda’s direction. Neither of you can see a difference, but apparently Elda can. After thirty or so minutes of this exercise, as Niels brings his rifle up to position, Elda shouts “Fire!”

Niels does. You and Markos watch as the cutout downrange sways. A neat little grouping, right in the chest.

“Niiiiice!” You exclaim, careful not to clap Niels on the back until the rifle is clear. “Good fucking progress here Niels. Looks like Elda was the trick after all.”

Elda looks away at your praise, but you think you can see the hint of a smile through her hair. “Well, I think my work here for today is done. I’m heading back.”

The three of you wave to Elda as she exits the firing range. Maybe she isn’t half bad after all…

“Well, I don’t know about you guys,” says Niels, grinning, “But I’m gonna quit while I’m ahead for today. See you guys later.”

Markos leaves, claiming that it’s about time to catch some Z’s anyway. You check the time, and holy crap, it’s almost 11:00.

>What do you do?
>Go to bed [This will initiate a three day timeskip, you can specify what the MC does in this time frame, but it will not result in any scenes.]
>Go to the Bar [One final scene at the Bar before the three day Timeskip]

>>29805616
He's been tussling with strange forces and stranger QM lately....

>>29805665
>>Go to the Bar [One final scene at the Bar before the three day Timeskip]

>>29805665
>Go to the Bar

I REQUIRE MOAR

>>29805665
>Go to bed [This will initiate a three day timeskip, you can specify what the MC does in this time frame, but it will not result in any scenes.]
>>29805563
Let the man type.

>>29805665
>>Go to the Bar [One final scene at the Bar before the three day Timeskip]

>>29805665
>Go to bar.
We proper Merc now time to celebrate to the success of our future career.

>>29805665
>>Go to the Bar [One final scene at the Bar before the three day Timeskip]
Seduce someone there.

Preferably of female or gurgax gender.

>>29805665
>>Go to the Bar [One final scene at the Bar before the three day Timeskip]

>>29805665
>Go to the Bar [One final scene at the Bar before the three day Timeskip]

And over the timeskip we get Niels to give us a crash course in hacking.

hmm, anyone else think we're going to find Cy at the bar, drinking heavily, i'm drawing conclusions after what Markos told us of his mission and the fact he wasn't there earlier

>>29805665
Timeskip.

>>29805665
BAR AT LAST!!!!

>>29805781
Dude probably needs ice for his dick from what we've heard

>>29805814
most likely

there should be a genemod we can get to help with that...

Almost unanimous Votes for the Bar scene. Writing now

File: 1390774225275.jpg-(34 KB, 512x384, Sciene goes too far.jpg)

34 KB JPG

>>29805861
Has science gone too far?

>>29805665
>Go to the Bar [One final scene at the Bar before the three day Timeskip]

>>29805665
>>bar

>>29805665
>Go to the Bar

I'm refreshing so hard my laptop overheats and shuts down every 5 minutes

>>29806095
I know how you feel bro.

>>29805616
Fall Guy, looking at the times between posts, takes about 25-35 minutes per update if he's focusing, seems like. About 30min, typically.

Just an interesting tidbit, I thought I'd share, for those curious.

>>29806118
you got a shitty just-one-fan HP dv6 too?

>>29806187
No. My computer is just old.

>>29806187
>>29806095
you could just get 4chan Xtension and have it autoupdate, fuck, default 4chan extension autoupdates...

>>29806217
problem is not the updates, just my laptop having not enough cooling fans by design
I can barely play anything, being stuck with oldschool games(not bad) and 15 min-matches(yes bad)

>>29806287
just take the back face cover off and chock it up on some blocks

>>29806287
http://www.amazon.com/s/?ie=UTF8&keywords=laptop+cooler

>>29806287
Open up the notebook, check fan positioning.
They are often under at least one speaker in an obstructive manner - can't regulate heat and they hoard dust.

You can cut off the speaker [you don't need that piece of shit anyway].

>>29806414
Also, blowing the dust away while you are already there is always a good idea.

>>29806315
>>29806394
>>29806414
thanks guys, will check if it works as soon as the thread finishes

any fun stuff to do while fallguy writes?

>>29806479
Not uselessly posting to make us reach the bump limit faster is always fun to do.

>>29806479
Imagine bad pick up lines to use at said bar.

>>29806440
Yeah well that's a given, didn't think I'd have to mention that.
>>29806447
No problem, cutting out the speaker might not work with your PC.
Helped with my dads though.
>>29806506
"Hey baby, how abou- oh shit you're HR. Nevermind!"

>>29806559
>oh shit you're HR
oh please, HR are too busy dealing with Valeries wake to do anythign else

>>29806479
Limericking.
I am terrible at them.

>>29806559
Hey baby, wanna help me solve a two body problem?

If my dick was a planet, would you be a moon?

My dick has been augmented to emit ultraviolet rays that cause incredible pleasure to women.

>>29806479
>>29806479
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KVRyY5QH9Lo
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QM3a_kp6yMU&list=PLntJc0D_KymspaIlyC6MCLQGoiKjbO35B

>>29806637
a limerick anon kept asking
while on his computer giggling
so while fallguy delivers
this tickled my liver
and so I ended up drinking

You decide that it’s late enough to allow for some Bar shenaniganery. You return your leftover clips and the M24 to the clerkbot before exiting the Range. You look around the now deserted hallway, trying to remember how to get to the Bar from here. Eventually it occurs to you. Damn thing is almost on the opposite end of the Brick, six miles away. Personally, you think this is on purpose. The last thing that the citizenry of the Brick need to deal with are intoxicated super human mercenaries wandering around with guns. You walk down the corridor, heading for the Tram station. You like taking the Tram on the Brick. The transit system runs across the exterior of the asteroid like ropes, tying the station together. But that’s not why you like it so much. Whoever designed it put windows on the top of the cabins, allowing riders to look out into space. Sometimes, when you’re feeling contemplative, which is rarely, you just ride the Tram around, appreciating the view of the stars.

You take a minute to enjoy the view of the stars. No atmosphere to muddy the image, just bright, clear dots drifting in space. Too soon, the Tram comes to a stop. You have arrived at the Tipsy Constructionbot, apparently named for a construtionbot that shorted out in a very amusing fashion when some far past tipsy workers poured beer onto its motherboard. As you approach the Bar, you notice a commotion as Darius and a merc you don’t recognize half carry, half drag an extremely drunk Maxim Bodrov out of the Bar.

“Dis woman! Dis woman think she can beat Maxim Bodrov!? Lemme go, and I will make a showing to her how the world is really working!”

>>29806684
Hey baby, wanna check out my 2-foot long, forked tongue with vibrating follicles?

“C’mon Belch,” mutters the merc you don’t recognize as he carries the flailing man down the corridor, “You’ve already lost enough of your paycheck to property damage. Let’s stop before going on yesterday’s mission becomes a total loss.”

“Hey rookie,” Darius nods as he pulls Bodrov down the corridor past you.

“Hey…” you answer, waving awkwardly at the three men.

Deciding that the two mercs have the Russian well in hand, you continue on into the bar, past the bouncers, who looked relieved that Maxim’s friends were sober enough to resolve the situation. You walk up to the bar and take a seat. The bartender, a grizzled ex-merc named Bob, nods in greeting to you. You’re pretty sure he’s got some expensive neural augments, the memory he has for regulars.

“Back from your first drop then, rookie.”

Not a question. A statement. Bob knows everything. You nod.

“Good shit. Drink’s on the house. Drink, singular. What’ll it be?”

>What’ll it be?

>>29806744
>clips
Magazines my good man

>>29806711
I like how he says STÜRMGEWÖR.

>>29806770
EVERY TIME.

>>29806770
Damnit, and that usually doesn't get me.

>>29806767

Straight Everclear

>>29806767
Your strongest drink

>>29806767
awww, we missed her

>What’ll it be?
something strong, but with flavor and taste that won't burn everything away, we want a good drink, not a hangover

>>29806767
good ol' white russian

>>29806767
>>What’ll it be?

White Russian

>>29806770
>>29806798
Could mean stripper clips you use to load a mag.

>>29806770
In 22XXs, magazines and clips are unified. NO DIFFERENCE.
ONLY DESTRUCTION.

>>29806767
Orange juice.
REAL orange juice.

>>29806767
Black russian.
I'm just trying to be contrarian.

>>29806767
>>What’ll it be?
A pint of dark lager.

Or your stronger drink, served in a mason jar with a tiny umbrella on it.

>>29806767
A Manly Dorf , of course.

>>29806767
A Cerulean Stargazer, with a quarter of rum.

>>29806844
in an AR thats got medium-high capacity, unless its like some for of mass effect weapon design (its not that advanced), its going to be a magazine

>>29806767
Pan-Galactic Gargle Blaster.

>>29806767
whisky, top shelf, straight

>>29806865
Oooooh, I like orange juice! Let's have that!

>>29806873
>>29806882
recipe please, but I still insist we drink a white russian.
>white russian drinking a white russian

>>29806896

This.

File: 1390776423233.jpg-(38 KB, 600x400, Best drink.jpg)

38 KB JPG

>>29806896
Yes.

>>29806896
Sure, why not?

>>29806865
> NO DIFFERENCE.
in 2014 and modern mag fed rifles, there is no difference, the magazine holds the clip traditionally, it would be the reinforced well that the clip was inserted into, removable mags brought the two together, with the walls of the magazine being the clip essentially

but there still called mags

>>29806767
seconding >>29806912

>>29806896
Triple voted

>>29806889
Yeah, I mean stripper clips that are used to refill the detachable magazines. People don't generally like to put them in one by one.

>>29806787
>>29806711
> number of tabs: 60, most gun shit and background info on flechette ammo
FUCK.

>>29807058
>flechette ammo
check out something called R.I.P by G2R

>>29806767
Considering his mood, order a starry night.

>>29807058
>>29807131
I thought flechette was shit?

>>29807131
I saw that on /k/ yesterday. People seemed to think it was worse than hollow points, but this is 4chan so I can't exactly state that as fact.

>>29798917

Hey OP, great quest, but I just wanted to point out that not calling the combat system The DAQ FAQ is an egregious oversight.

“Pan-Galactic Gargle Blaster.”

Bob stares at you for a few seconds before snorting. The large man turns away from you and begins to snatch bottles of alcohol off of the shelves. Rum, gin, vodka, even some whisky from the top shelf. You stare at the growing collection in shock. You didn’t honestly think that Bob would’ve come up with a mix for the Pan-Galactic Gargle Blaster. He starts pouring the assortment of spirits into a large water glass, and you can only look on in horror. Eventually the bartender turns back around, and smacks the now full water glass down on the bar, his face granite. “Didn’t have any Qalactin Hypermint extract. Smartass.”

Bob watches you, eyes shaded by bushy brows.

>How do you drink?
>Sip it. Little by little.
>Swig it. The middling route.
>Turn it back. Lack a giant bitch.
>Hold nose. CHUG.

>>29807191
mainly when you don't have a lot hitting the target and they are small

but a high ROF fixes that, you tear shit up with them

>>29807210
>Sip it. Little by little.
Very carefully.

>>29807191
Flechette is good in asymmetrical warfare. Like when you need to tear into your national guard.

>>29807210
>>Swig it. The middling route.
lets be smart

>>29807210
>get bitches, then sip it

>>29807210
>>Hold nose. CHUG.
We ordered this drink. Now we suffer the consequences.

>>29807210
>Hold nose. CHUG.,
No other way to drink the Pan-Galatic Gargle Blaster. Take it fast, take it hard and have your brain split in two.

>>29807194
/k/ can be DUMB at times. There is nothing wrong with hollow points.

>>29807210
>Hold nose. CHUG.

BE A MAN

>>29807210
>>Hold nose. CHUG.

>>29807210
>Swig it. The middling route.
letss not kill ourselves on it

>>29807210
>>Swig it. The middling route.

>>29807210
"Where the hell did you get the tooth of an Algolian suntiger, then?"

>>29807210

FYI there is a Pan-Galactic Gargle Blaster. It's made at Zaphod's in Ottawa and involves layering various alcohols.

The one posted online, FYI, is fake.

>>29807210
What the hell lets do it
>Hold Nose. CHUG.

>chug it being the highest bidder
well good bye guys, nice questing with ya

>>29807266
Perhaps I worded that strangely. I mean the general consensus was that hollow points were more effective than the R.I.P. rounds.

>>29807210
>>Swig it. The middling route.

>>29807322
>Namefag quitting the quest

And nothing of value was lost.

>>29807210
>Swig it. The middling route.
If Ford Prefect can down three of these, a genetically engineered super mercenary should be able to too!

>>29807327
Okay that makes more sense.

>>29807355
remember, Maxim is the one with a cyberliver,not us

Rolled 2

Alright... Seems like a tie between swig and chug.

I shall roll a d2 to establish the victor!

Any subsequent votes will be considered

>>29807210
>Swig it. The middling route.

>>29807131
Well that's rather relevant to my interests as well.
>>29807191
I don't think so. Iunno, I have to read into the topic more myself.

>>29807131
Heh, relevant to my interests.

>>29807210
>>Swig it. The middling route.
Also, this is probably going to insult our tastebuds more than any other part of our body.

>>29807448
>We wake up on a strange planet
>Naked, spooning a goat, surrounded by dead CorpSec
>The Hangover Quest

>>29807448
Aw yeah, time to chug that bitch.

>>29807210
>Swig it. The middling route.

Let's not be stupid

>>29807270
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZSS5dEeMX64
>BE A MAN

YOU MUST DRINK SWIFT AS THE DRUNKEN FRATBOY

>BE A MAN

WITH ALL THE GUTS OF AN IRISH BARFLY

>BE A MAN

WITH ALL THE STRENGTH OF THE FREEZING RUSKIE

AS INTOXICATED AS A MAN WITH NOOTHIING TO LOOOOOSE

>>29807210
>>Swig it. The middling route.

>>29807448
CHUG CHUG CHUG!

>>29807516
>do this
>wake up after the timeskip, next to Maxim and Darius
>sore anus

>>29807448
please don't kill us

File: 1390778164092.png-(177 KB, 364x343, clown.png)

177 KB PNG

>>29807550
There are fates worse than death.

>>29807448
Do we get a roll bonus for being a quarter Russian?

>>29807635
> full body cyborg route engaged

You stare at the Pan-Galactic Liver Obliterator. You extend a trembling hand, and seize the glass. You bring it to your lips. Oh god, the burning. It feels as though your nose is getting chemo’d. For a moment you consider downing it in one fell swoop, but Maxim is the one with the industrial catfish liver, not you. Grimacing, you take a long steady draft. You gag. Oh god, it’s awful. Tears leaking out from the corners of your eyes, you see Bob smiling. It is not a kind smile.

Fuck this. Fuck being smart. You may only be a quarter Russian, but that means a quarter of your liver grew up on vodka and anti-freeze. You seize your nose and down the horrific concoction. You slam the glass back onto the bar, head down and coughing. You look up at Bob through crying eyes. The granite in his smile as softened. Maybe something more like limstone. He hands you a glass of what you pray is water and three red pills. “Tox-Null. You’ll be drunk, but you’ll live.”

You swallow the three pills in a rush, downing them before your body registers the amount of poison it just ingested.

“Good show, rookie.”

A female voice. You failed to notice anyone sit down next to you, you were so focused on the Pan Galactic Skull Fucker. You turn. The first thing you notice is the red hair.

The Valkyrie is sitting next to you, smiling. “You the one who took on a BART with just an axe?”

>What do you say to the Valkyrie?

>>29807734
"I hacked it so good even my prodigious engineering skills couldn't get it working again."

>>29807734
"Tomahawk. Wanna see it?"

>>29807734
"The plan was to have Elda snipe its face off, that didn't work, so it was time for Plan Axe to come into effect"

I take it the recording of our deed has spread?

>>29807734
Try to give her our best smile.
>An axe, and balls of steel.

>>29807734
pray we have condoms, and also pray for nanite reconstruction is a fact in the setting

>>29807734
"Yup. That BART has got nothing on this drink."

>>29807827
I am going to second this.

>>29807827
I support this

>>29807734
>> It seemed like a good idea at the time.

>>29807734
"Well, a tomahawk that creates huge bursts of force that can flatten an engine block, but yeah, killed that sumbitch with it and my dashing good looks."

>>29807734
It couldn't walk after I was finished with it.
You won't be able to either.

Flash her our beautiful teeth.

>>29807898
oh god that is so terrible it might work

and she is probably going to break our legs and our bed

>>29807827
HA! This!

>>29807887
then again so did ordering a pan galactic panty chaser

>>29807898
>I won't be able to either.
fixed

>>29807827
I like

>>29807915
I KNOW RIGHT
My first thought was:

It couldn't get up after I was finished with it.
Will I be able to get it up after you're finished with me?

>>29807898
Oh god this