>>33722800
>Go try to find the kitchen, obviously.
Why did you post with only one prompt, Chief?

>>33722800
>Go try to find the kitchen, obviously.

Hey Chief

>>33722800
>find the kitchen

Also, I finished that thing you told us not to do: http://imgur.com/FYUhnyU

Still working on a picture of Shax cosplaying as a ninja turtle though.

>>33722919

White underbelly! She looks pretty reptilian there. Still, looks great! I like it. Thanks so much!

Anyway, three votes for kitchen. Writing.

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>>33722919
>that image

>>33722919
Holy goddamn. Great work anon! But shame on you for making Shax lewd too.

Your Auntie once said that you could judge an entire people by the kinda food they eat. Naturally, you asked Auntie what kinda people that made goblins. That is when she swatted you with a wooden spoon, so you assumed that was the wrong question. Anyway! To properly judge the contents of this castle, you must first assault the larder!

"Nost, Rund! Let's go hunt for their kitchen!" You proudly point upwards at this declaration, hoping you didn't point at a ghost and made it mad so it would swoop at you with a spooky noise. After ducking down in case you did, you look back at the two boys.

Nost is picking his teeth with some kinda bone, "Alright, boss. You got any idea where it will be?"

With a sigh, Rund lifts the visor off his helmet, "If she did, we wouldn'ta have been told to go hunt for it, now would we? Anyway, just follow my nose. It is world renowned for sniffin' out kitchens." You don't believe it, but you figure you'll follow him a bit.

Xab waves at you and says he and the cybolds are going to go hunt for 'assets valuable to the continued growth of my people' whatever THAT means. Sitri follows you along, and so does Blaise.

"This one had better keep an eye on those deviants," Whoop mentions softly, and goes to follow Xab. Two parties, then!

Going through the castle at a ramshackle pace, you don't have any luck finding the kitchen so far. Mostly just halls and rooms and trophy rooms with boring loot. Rund obviously has no idea where he is going, and you're worried that you're taking too long and making the ghosts angry.

>Your spookometer is at 1 out of 10! Don't let it hit 10!

Where do you wanna head to?

>There is a big doorway at the end of this hall that has gotta be a dining room. Kitchen should be near that, right?
>There was a door under some stairs. That's gotta be a storage area, right? It's gotta be connected to the kitchen!

>>33723146
>Door
>Under stairs
BASEMENT HO!

>>33723146
>There was a door under some stairs. That's gotta be a storage area, right? It's gotta be connected to the kitchen!

>>33723146
>There is a big doorway at the end of this hall that has gotta be a dining room. Kitchen should be near that, right?
Always go for the double doors. They're more fun tom kick open!

>>33723146
>There is a big doorway at the end of this hall that has gotta be a dining room. Kitchen should be near that, right?
The allure of food should not be underestimated.

>>33723146
>>There was a door under some stairs. That's gotta be a storage area, right? It's gotta be connected to the kitchen!

Your mechanic backfired? I want to know what happens when the spookometer hits 10.

File: 1405026031177.png (144 KB, 646x757)

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The morning is slow, and I am not!

Writing.

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>>33722919
I

Uh

File: urkel.gif (2 MB, 313x240)

2 MB GIF

>>33723324
dat underbelly

>>33722919
You monster.

You wonderful, wonderful monster.

File: shaxcutebreaker.png (26 KB, 607x501)

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Naturally, as a goblin, you are interested in small, cramped, dark spaces. They make you feel pretty dang comfortable. So when you spotted that door under those stairs, you just knew you had to check it out! "Alright, boys. We're going to that tiny door there."

"Uh, boss? I don't think I can fit inside that," Nost says, embarrassed. He had been putting on weight, and he was never a small lad to begin with. Sitri slaps him on the back encouragingly, and Nost says some unkind things about him. Blaise just tosses her hair with a 'hmph'.

You shrug, "Doesn't matter, I'm checkin' it out anyway." You stride over to the door and kick it open without a care, bending over to look in. Definitely seems like some kinda storage room. You hear a strange howling noise. And a ghost dog comes leaping out of the doors, causing you to fall over on your back in shock!

>Your spookometer rose to 2!

Blaise smacks it in the nose with a snowball, and Rund starts frantically wailing on it while you try to find the strength in your legs again. Jeez! That was really scary! "G-g-good work, boys..." You say, uncertain, as you stand up. The ghost seems to have vanished into ectoplasm. "Hey, Rund. Go check that storage room out, alright? That's a boss order!"

Rund shakes his head, but you nod at him, and then he shakes his head again. You tell Nost to make Rund nod, and Nost puts two hands on either side of Rund's head and makes him nod when you give the order again. A few moments later and he tells you the coast is clear. The room doesn't have much in it besides ingredients. Rund is chewing on a raw onion which you say is gross, but he says is good for his heart or some other total LIE.

"Hey, Shax, check this out," Sitri raps he knuckles on a wall, and grins at the sound it makes. Shortly thereafter, you find a switch and flip the wall open. Through the passageway is a sudden drop to some other room. It seems shiny.

>Back to the storage room and kitchen!
>B-but muh shiny

>>33722993
I actually think she's more cute with a white underbelly

>>33723470
>B-but muh shiny
Shax lives for shiny

>>33723470
>B-but muh shiny
S-shiny...

>>33723470
>>B-but muh shiny

Shiny!

>>33723470
>B-but muh shiny

>>33723470
chief tone it down pls, i spooped my pants and the dog is angry at me because i get angry at him when he does it

>>33723470
>>B-but muh shiny
Anyone who chooses another choice is a communist.

>>33723548
Why does your dog where pants?

>>33723611

WHERE does his dog WHY pants, anon.

Jeez!

Anyway! Give me a d20 check for reasons I cannot reveal.

Rolled 18

>>33723638
here you go

Rolled 1

>>33723638

Rolled 3

>>33723638
ROLAN.

Rolled 5

>>33723638

>>33723664
Sasuga Shax-chan.

>>33723650
AW YEA-
>>33723664
fuck

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>>33723664

I implore you to reconsider!

Writing.

>>33723664
bleh
we need to get some more im the boss points for this in the future

Will holding Blaise's hand lower our spookometer?

Just uh, asking, in a pinch

>>33723707
>>33723324
>>33723470

Hey Chief, I was gonna throw this on the ask.fm but I figured I'd just mention it here:

Can't you just upload that fanart folder to imgur and make an album? I don't have much experience using it or anything, but it seems like you can just mass upload.

>>33723771
Only one way to find out!

>>33723707
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zN1Qc6M-z2w

File: sitri.png (202 KB, 700x1100)

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Well... you said you wanted to check out the kitchen, but surely a little snooping around wouldn't hurt, right? Besides! It was shiny! "Hey, guys, check this out! It's shiny!" Nost and Rund are almost immediately there with you, picking down into the drop.

"I dunno, boss. It's a bit steep," Rund says, running a finger over his chin.

"Seems okay to me," Nost says, still a bit greasy from the spell Sitri cast on him to fit him inside the door, "B-but you can go first."

Before too long, Sitri comes back, hunched over in the tight crawlspace. "Hey, I checked out the rest of the passages. All dead ends. Looked down there yet?" You shake your head, "What's keeping you? Here, I'll go first." Sitri slides down the drop. You don't hear anything else from her.

"Sitri? Hey, Sitri! Where you at?" No reply, "Hey!" You yell, "Yell back at me!" You practically shouted it, but there is no response.

Nost looks at Rund, "Well I ain't goin' down there." Rather than wait on one of those two cowards, you jump down the hole. No time to wait if she's in danger!

You drift down to land in a pile of gold coins. Jeez, this can't be real! There is so many! It's almost like your vault back in your crystal palace. You wonder where Sitri, is, and taking a glance around you see something snake out of the coins. It's get three heads, each with a woman's face on it, and their eyes are mouths, and her mouth has fingers for teeth! Gross!

>Your spookometer raised to 4! Dangerously spooky!

You instinctively throw your sword at it in a blind panic, and it cuts the serpent in half. Oh thank goodness it is dead and isn't coming back. Nost falls on top of you with a crunch. Rund lands close by. Crawling out from under the heavyset goblin, you take a look around. Still no sign of Sitri. Blaise lands gracefully shortly thereafter and takes a look around.

Gotta find that goat girl!

>Investigate the dead thing.
>Run in a blind panic.
>Go through the nearest open door.

>>33723924
>Run in a blind panic.
Sounds perfect to me!

>>33723924
>Investigate the dead thing
Noooo, not Sitri! You were too lewd (mostly by proxy) to live, too bard-y to die!

>>33723924
>Go through the nearest open door.

>>33723924
>Investigate the dead thing.

>>33723924
>>Investigate the dead thing.
Please don'tlet it have eaten Sitri

>>33723924
Have our maid investigate dead thing while we look around for Sitri.

Also
>Dangerously spooky!
Is this a reference to that furry chart? Specifically the version where the last one is replaced with DANGEROUSLY CHEESY?

>>33723924
>Run in a blind panic.
Sitri is missing and only blind panic can save us now!

>>33723924
>Investigate the dead thing

I may or may not be making a lewd video game, featuring a homage character of Shax.

I'm sorry if this bother anyone, please don't hit!

>>33724104
I won't hit if you tell me more.

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>>33724040
>Tfw mansion boss is a skeleton

>>33724104
You're going to need to give me more information than that, Anon

I need to throw money at you and then be extremely ashamed of myself for doing so

>>33723924
Nuh-uh. Sitri is gone. YOU DON'T FUCK WITH OUR FRIENDS YOU STOOPID HOUSE!

>Begin the whirlwind of death, this house is going to be a parking lot now!

You dare peek into the chopped up bits of a monster??

Very well! Give me a d20 check!

Rolled 7

>>33724175
Rolan2.

Rolled 2

>>33724175

I ain't afraid of no ghosts

Rolled 8

>>33724175

Rolled 14

>>33724175
Fuck this house!

Rolled 17

>>33724175

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>>33724193

You gotta be faster if you want to make love to a castle like this, anon.

Writing!

>>33724181
>>33724187
>>33724191
Glad to see OWQ luck is back.

>>33724260
Clearly we need to rely on Blaise some more.

>>33724260
All the ghosts are scaring Shax's luck spirits away.

File: 1400644914135.jpg (157 KB, 617x617)

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I'm spooked.

You take a big gulp and walk over to the snake. It didn't, you know, eat her, right? You remember the wiggling teeth fingers and get a big fat case of the heebeejeebees as you approach it's body. What would being chomped on by that feel like? Gotta be mega gross.

When you get to the corpse, you see the hole made from you throwing the sword is filled with writhing arms, from the shoulder down. On the knuckles of the 'hand' part of the arm is stringy black hair. You quickly scrabble backwards.

>Spookometer is raised to 7!

"What's got you so scared, boss?" Nost walks over. One ofthe arms flings itself out of the snake and grabs onto Nost's throat. He makes a noise, doubles over. When he stands back up straight you see fingers pulling his lips back from inside his mouth, another set of green fingers growing and wriggling in larger size from his gums.

>Spookometer is raised to 8! Watch out!

'oh jeez oh jeez oh jeez oh jeez' You realize you've been saying this non stop, and have a pearl in your hand.

Blaise puts a hand on your shoulder, "Stop. Don't blast him to bits. It is just a possession. I'll deal with it!" Chanting a bit, Blaise throws a dark pearl of her own at the corpse. Tendrils wrap around the large snake like body, and seem to drag it into nothingness, one tentacle reaching out and pulling the arm off Nost. His deformities quickly fade.

"Hey, Nost, buddy, you alright?" Rund says, tentatively approaching him. Nost sniffs and rubs his nose with his arm.

"'Course I am dummy," The goblin says, wiping at his eyes. Ain't no one gonna call him a crybaby, though.

Laying in a pile of gold coins where the body was is Sitri, unconscious and mostly naked. Well, she's usually pretty naked anyway, but moreso now. You quickly put your cloak around her and pick her up.

Where to, Boss? The drop above is too high to get to without using your mask.

>Open door! Check it out!
>Go to a closed door and burst through!
>Follow your nose to food!

>>33724487
>Open door! Check it out!
Sitri search!

Rolled 11

>>33724487
>Follow your nose to food!
rolling to resist fear

>>33724487
>>Go to a closed door and burst through!

Assert dominance over this place by being super loud and noisy!

>>33724487
>Go to a closed door and burst through!
I have a feeling if we go for the food we'll just end up in that cliche "full course evening meal on the table in an abandoned house" trap.

>>33724487
>>Go to a closed door and burst through!

>>33724487
>>Follow your nose to food!
And tell Blaise that she can hold our hand since she's feeling scared.

Rolled 15

>>33724487
We know where the loot is, and we're at the foundation.

Level the place, we'll scrape up the gold from the rubble.

Bursting through a closed door??

Give me a d20 for spookiness levels!

Rolled 1

>>33724691
We'll beat this house yet!

>>33722800
>>49/56 CyRCTHaM exp
It would be really cool if we could grab Courage of the Non-Goblin while in this scary place.

Rolled 2

>>33724691

Rolled 1

>>33724691
H-here goes....

Rolled 19

>>33724691

>>33724706
>>33724717
AHAHAHAHAHAHA

>>33724706
Fuck.
My 5th 1 in about 15 rolls in this quest. I may be cursed. At least I've rolled a 20 too, r-right?
>>33724709
>>33724717
Oh Jesus.

>>33724706
>>33724709
>>33724717
Holy crap. These rolls are so bad they must wrap around to being good.

>>33724706
>>33724709
>>33724717
AHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

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Rolled 15

>>33724706
>>33724717
WHYYYYYYY

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>>33724717
>>33724709
>>33724706
I can't breathe
This house
2 spoopy

>>33724729
Anon why so slow. Why. WhY SO SLWO QHBOJBALS UAHLIFASL

File: 1388249873540.gif (906 KB, 450x360)

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Rolled 9

>>33724706
>>33724717

Now she's lost it.

The house has seen our attempt to assert dominance and has responded in kind.

Rolled 14

>>33724761
It wouldn't have mattered, there'd be a critfail anyway

>>33724761
It doesn't matter anyway, crits override anything else. And we had two. Wait if you get two crit failures on one roll do they stack to make the result super terrible?

>>33724706
>>33724709
>>33724717

Ahahahahahaha holy shit

>>33724790
As long as it doesn't involve anyone (Sitri) dying, it should. Make it so.

File: 1396401432007.gif (2.94 MB, 431x400)

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>>33724706
>>33724717
>>33724709

Spookometer is going to explode!

>>33724776
>shax gets so scared she kills her friends

Clearly the ghosts are affecting our dice. That ain't fair.

>>33724790
m-maybe they override each other?

>>33724817
yeah, they merge into a hypercrit

>>33724707
Seriously, this idea is looking more badass by the update.

You can overcome your fear, Shax!

>>33724802
Shax should just cut that spookometer, it doesn't deserve to live.

>>33724802
Chief, do you watch Kamen Rider?

>>33722800

Just chiming in to appreciate the picture :3

You gotta find that dumb mirror and loot and get outta here! You kick down a door and see four skinny things with no heads and arms for legs carrying Sitri down a hall way. What. When the door crashes to the ground, they spin around, throwing Sitri against the wall and bounding at you, screeching 'pretty belly rip it open eat it up' over and over.

>Your spookometer rose to 9! PANIC PANIC PANIC

What if that is Sitri than what is in your...? The Sitri in your arm's head spins slowly in a circle, making a full 360 degree rotation, a the back of her head caving in to form a mouth, and two arms sprouting from it. You drop the thing on the ground, yoinking you cape off in the process. "Heeeeeeeeeeeeeelll o o o o o SHAX" The creature says, landing on the arms from the back of it's head, entire body snapping and creaking in odd angles as Sitri's simulacrum splits into a tree of hands and arms, each finger having a toothy mouth under the nail, and the voices speaking simultaneously, "Do you want us to sing for you?" It whispers in a squeaky, child like voice.

>Your spookometer is off the charts!

"N-no thanks," You reply, before falling down to your knees.

"Shax!" You hear someone cry, but you're not sure who because your vision is white. You feel a steady hand on your shoulder, and look up. It's a turtle in a leather jacket giving you a thumbs up. "Be cool, babe. Everything is going to be alright." Wow, he's suave. You stand up, and realize you're on a beach wearing a polka dot frilly swimsuit. It's a good time to relax, and forget about that nightmare you had!

"Shax!" You feel a sharp pain in your head and snap your eyes open. One of the hands is biting into your skull. You realize you're screaming. Blaise brings her axe down and cuts the beast in half. She throws a lance of ice down the corridor, skewering one of the monsters, and readies herself next to you.

>Grab Blaise and cry!
>Cradle sword and cry!
>Make a cave entrance and panic off to your castle!

>>33725109
>Grab Blaise and cry!

>>33725109
>Cradle sword and cry!

>>33725109
>Grab Blaise and cry!

>>33725109
>Panic smash everything! Must save Sitri!

>>33725109
>Grab Blaise and cry!
More Blaise points!

>>33725109
>Grab Blaise and cry!
>Cradle sword and cry!
Grab both of course.

>>33725109
>Grab Blaise and cry!
She can use her maid powers to save us.

>>33725109
>Grab Blaise and cry!
Explain to her how this place is, quote, '2 spooky'.

>>33725109
>Make a cave entrance and panic off to your castle!
SUMMON THE TURTLES

>>33725109
>>Grab Blaise and cry!

> You feel a steady hand on your shoulder, and look up. It's a turtle in a leather jacket giving you a thumbs up. "Be cool, babe. Everything is going to be alright." Wow, he's suave.
Turtle Fonz makes everything better.

>>33725109
>>Grab Blaise and cry!
She's a pretty good maid after all...

>>33725109
>>Grab Blaise and cry!

>>33725109
>Grab Blaise and cry!
3Spooky5me

>>33725109
Spam turtles, lizards, and explodey birds. Fire Lasers!

>>33725219
This is it, Shax. The time has come.

We must be tall.

Alright!

Give me a d20 roll for maid service levels!

Rolled 4

>>33725306

Rolled 1

>>33725306

Rolled 2

>>33725306
Let's see if our luck continues.

Rolled 4

>>33725306
Blaise will boost us back to our recent competence, I'm sure of it!

Rolled 15

>>33725306

Rolled 18

>>33725306
plsno1

Rolled 13

>>33725306
nat 1 inc

>>33725319
Anon...anon why...
I want out of this fucking house!

Rolled 1

>>33725306

Rolled 10

>>33725319
why anon why.

I hate this stupid place why did we come here

Rolled 3

>>33725319
Fuck me. Why did I roll

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Rolled 11

>>33725314
>>33725319
>>33725320
This. Fucking. Castle.

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>>33725319

File: 33861Om.gif (4.05 MB, 300x168)

4.05 MB GIF

>>33725319

>>33725314
>>33725319
>>33725320
WHAT IS EVEN HAPPENING
SHAX, PLEASE

>>33725319

Shiki, pls.

>>33725314
>>33725319
>>33725320
That's not fair. That's just not fair.

This house is a fucking curse on our dice holy shit. Why did we come here? Chief stop making us roll, please.

Rolled 12

turns out shax is fucking terrified of ghosts and nothing will make it better

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>>33725319
>>33725320
>>33725314

It's a good thing I don't treat crit fails as life or death, anon, 'cause damn man.

Writing.

>>33725319
No...Blaise no...pls.

>>33725319
>>33725320
Stop rolling. Forever. Burn all your dice and never use the /tg/ roller again.

>>33725314
>>33725319
>>33725320
There is no salvation, the dice are cursed in this unholy place. We must retreat. Evacuate. Leave. Why are we even still here? The house as all but won.

Rolled 4

>>33725415
No.

>>33725393

The Dice love making poor Shax scared.

Either this is going to be all a dream or Shax gets a moe character flaw from all of this.

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>>33725319
THIS CASTLE IS AN EYESORE

THIS CASTLE THIS CASTLE THIS CASTLE THIS CASTLE THIS CASTLE THIS CASTLE THIS CASTLE THIS CASTLE THIS CASTLE THIS CASTLE THIS CASTLE THIS CASTLE THIS CASTLE THIS CASTLE THIS CASTLE THIS CASTLE THIS CASTLE THIS CASTLE THIS CASTLE THIS CASTLE THIS CASTLE

Rolled 235

>>33725415
just because someone rolls bad once doesn't mean they roll bad always

THIS IS WHAT WE HAVE WROUGHT

WE LEWDED SHAX

WE WEREN'T SUPPOSED TO LEWD SHAX

>>33725466

We must sacrifice the lewd drawfags to appease the dice gods.

The lewd art can stay

>>33725466
SEXUAL

HEALING

Why else would maids exist?

>>33725393
Average roll of the entire thread is 8. No more rolls pls.

Rolled 6

>>33725498
shit rolls won't always happen

>>33725512
And yet the average further drops.

Rolled 15

>>33725512
Still, after digging this deep into a hole with dice, relying on said dice to dig us out is kind of dumb

>>33725512
Anon pls stop.

>>33725512
You don't know this quest very well, do you? This quest has had, on average, way more shit rolls than good.

>>33725498
If you only count the rolls that made it into first 3, the average becomes 4. Why is this place such abject suffering? I know our dice have historically been shit but I'm pretty sure this is a new low.

Rolled 1

>>33725527
i'm going to roll until i fix the dice

>>33725558
Because ghosts.

>>33725565
The dice are fixing you.

>>33725565
Oh god why. Anon pls. I... I can't take this anymore.

>>33725565
You need to stop man. You're going to kill us all.

File: 1406399658377.jpg (46 KB, 640x480)

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Rolled 19

>>33725565

Rolled 19, 5, 17, 6, 4, 5, 9, 13, 19, 19 = 116

Rolling

>>33725618
Still no 20 not a single 20 all thread.

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>ITT

All these 1's man. All these 1's.

Rolled 12, 6, 9, 15, 8, 12, 3, 2, 2, 3 = 72

>>33725618
I'll join you.

Rolled 9

>>33725618
Huh, I kinda expected a one.

>>33725618
Ladies and gentlemen, this array at roughly a 12 average is the single best string of voting all thread.

really hoping Blaise is a monster now

don't want real Blaise being mean to Shax

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>>33725466
SHIT, I DID THIS.

UH

UH

OKAY I THINK I FIXED IT

THERE'S NOTHING LEWD ABOUT SWIMWEAR, RIGHT?

>>33725702
I think maybe Shax will just panic and cling to her too much for her to do anything.

Rolled 11

>>33725727

>>33725702
Maybe Blaise is 2Spookyed as well and we can be 2Spookyed together.

Rolled 16, 15, 18, 16, 16, 10, 20, 17, 8, 14 = 150

>>33725727
Only one way to find out.

>>33725770
Problem solved.

>>33725770
What.

Oh dang it is Blaise, she's strong and your maid so she should be fine. You stand up shakily and walk over to her, "Hey, Blaise, th-thanks for helping me out back there, you're a pretty good maid sometimes, you know? So I just wanna lean on you a bit and maybe cry some, alright? That's an order or something so just get over here okay?"

The maid stumbles over and falls down. Wait, no that isn't how it is supposed to work! From the ground, two ghosts raise up, each pulling a spectral sword out from Blaise's body. She weakly turns to face you, with a soft smile on her mouth. "Hey... Shax... you're gonna..." You don't catch the last bit. You quickly scrabble over to her and lean close to her ear. "Carry that weight." What's that supposed to mean?? You shake her roughly, telling her that she can't be dead! "Stop, please, hard to breath. I'm just paralyzed. Ow."

A lady floats from the ceiling on a chair, sipping from tea. "Oh, here is the invader." She makes a motion with her hand and a bunch of ghosts come pouring out of the walls, swarming over you and holding you down. "Your fear really let us home in on your location, you know? I was wondering what was going on. We haven't had guests in a long, long time." The ghosts start to drag you towards the middle of the room, others pulling away the gold coins to reveal a big trap door that they pull open. "I'm going to need you to tell me all about how you came to enter this castle. I should have an enchantment to prevent that sort of thing, and a good loyal knight killing anyone with a shot at it."

The ghosts drag Blaise, Nost, Rund, and Sitri with them. Before too long, you're in a big bedroom with the doors bared, guarded by two ghost minotaur looking things, and two zombies in very fine armor. Your items are nowhere to be found.

>Make small talk with the guards.
>Ask them if you can go to the bathroom.
>Yell at them and berate them.
>Over come your fear of ghosts with sheer force of will then attack them.

>>33725799
>>Over come your fear of ghosts with sheer force of will then attack them.

SHAX STRONG

Rolled 10

>>33725799
Screw this place, start breaking everything.

Also, test our light magic on the ghosts.

>>33725799
>Bathroom

We're scared as shit and I don't want this story to go magical piss realm.

>>33725799
>Ask them if you can go to the bathroom.

>>33725799
>Over come your fear of ghosts with sheer force of will then attack them.
Yes!

>>33725799
>Small talk with the guards

>>33725799
>Make small talk with the guards.
Zombies aren't spooky. And even if they are ghosts, they're ghost *Minotaurs* and Minotaurs are pretty cool, right?

>>33725799
>Over come your fear of ghosts with sheer force of will then attack them.
FUCK GHOSTS

>>33725727
That reminds of of Fate.

>>33725799
Do we have pearls?

Summon that glarestone if we do(it might banish ghosts since it's celestial light) and then just go wild with summons. If not, we still got explodey birds and minor lasers.

>>33725799
>Over come your fear of ghosts with sheer force of will then attack them.

Fuck this entire castle

>>33725799
>Make small talk with the guards.
Does anyone really want to fight with the dice in this godforsaken castle? With our luck we'll get 3 nat 1s and manage to die.

>>33725799
>Make small talk with the guards.
Attacking really is a bad idea right now.

Rolled 1

>>33725949
Attacking is only a bad idea if we roll badly, and that's not really likely at this point

>>33725799
>Yell at them and berate them.

In a delirious sort of fashion.

>>33725799
>>Ask them if you can go to the bathroom.

pls ghost

>>33725971
I'm sorry, you were saying anon? Not likely, eh? HM?

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>>33725971

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>>33725971

>>33725799
>Make small talk with the guards
Overcoming the fear sounds like it would require a roll. I hope you understand why I'm hesitant to pick that choice.

>>33725971
I'm sorry, what were you saying?

>>33725971
HAHAHAHAHAHAHA. But seriously no though.

>>33725971
STOP

>>33725971
>if we roll badly
>if we roll badly
>roll badly
>nat 1

dice i've rolled this thread: 1, 3, 6, 1, 1
i think i'm done rolling

>>33726022

Get out of here, you witch!

Rolled 3, 8, 11, 10, 5, 17, 14, 20, 12, 15 = 115

>>33725971
The school swimsuit didn't work!

Rolled 16

>>33726022
Yeah, you should stop rolling.

You choose to overcome fear! That, uh. That's gonna take a d20.

So. Here's hoping.

Rolled 12

>>33726079

Rolled 15

>>33726079
Pls pls pls

Rolled 10

>>33726079

Rolled 2

>>33726079
God damnit people, I swear.

Rolled 15

>>33726079

>>33726094
>>33726095
>>33726096
Shax is officially done with spookiness.

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>>33726079

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>>33726095

Rolled 8

>>33726079
>>33726095
Finally our dice are working again

Rolled 11

>>33726131
Yay!

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>>33726095

It worked?

Writing,

>>33726185
It must've considering I'm the guy who drew the original pic, the edited one, and made that roll.

That or the dice gods are simply as fickle as ever.

>>33726215
Imma go with fickle. Even lewd Shax is much cuter than she is lewd.

>>33726215
I know what it was. The dice gods were as scared of ghosts as Shax is.

>>33726095
They fucked too much with her friends and Shax just hit that moment of pure terror where she just sort of snapped and became eerily calm.

>>33726356
The break down afterwards is going to be pretty brutal then.

How are we supposed to attack them with no items? Is it finally LASER's time to shine?

>>33726393

For the ghosts.

You sit there for a few moments. They took you prisoner. They took your stuff. They took your boys. The more you think about it, the more mad you get. After a few minutes you get up and start pacing around. They took your stuff! That's your stuff! You looted it fair and square! Why do they think they can just come along, be spooky and creepy, and take your stuff? You worked hard for it! What did they do? Spook someone? That's worthless! Any ghost can do that! You had to knock over cities for all that loot! And don't even get started about your boys! Those were your boys, not some ghost's spook target! You're fuming and stomping around the room now.

One of the zombies clears it's throat, "Uh, miss? Could you keep it down?"

"No. You keep it down!" You shout, "Who do you think you are, tellin' me to keep it down! This is outreegis! I can't believe it! You let me talk to that ghost lady right now!"

"I, uh, can't let you do that?" The zombie says, looking nervously at his friend, "And I really must ask you to keep it dow-" You cut him off with a light spear through the head, blowing a hole through the wall, and taking out the minotaur ghost next to him. The other two don't even have a chance to react before you blow them to smithereens, too.

With a third pearl, you summon four turtles. Screw it, it is time to wreck this place up! You hop on the back of one of the turtles, and crash through the doorway. Let's go find your belongings! That includes Blaise and Sitri.

Crashing through the halls isn't very quiet, and ghosts continually appear. Luckily, your turtles blast them to nothingness with lasers whenever they do. You quickly run into Xab and Whoop. The fishman had apparently been fending off ghosts with his holy magic, and had even enslaved some to help him out. It isn't long till you find Nost and Rund in a bedroom cell as well.

Now you just need to find the ghost lady and the girls.

>Smash to the throne room!
>Smash to the master bedrooms!

>>33726521
hahahaha.... ha... yeah Shax is going to have nightmares for like the next year.

>>33726530
>Smash to the Master Bedrooms!

>>33726530
>Smash to the master bedrooms!
Obviously!

>>33726530
Bedrooms, throne room is obviously a final boss encounter area.

>>33726530
>Smash to the master bedrooms!
Oh boy

>>33726530
>Smash to the master bedrooms!
I just think it would be more funny if they were in there?

>>33726530
>Smash to the master bedrooms!
Make's sense, they put us in a bed room.

Rolled 16

>>33726530
>>Smash to the master bedrooms!

>>33726530
>>Smash to the master bedrooms!
Can't let them rest on their laurels

>>33726530
>Smash to the master bedrooms!

>>33726530
They took our belongings but left the Pearls? Are they magically linked to Shax or something

>>33726643
Well obviously.

>>33726643

Pearls are magical!

Also if you can't hide seven pearls in your outfit, you ain't trying.

>>33726643
Undead probably can't touch those things.

>>33726687
Oh good, they didn't take our outfit then!

That would've been lewd.

>>33726687
W-where did she hide them? In her cleavage?

Rolled 1

>>33726742
In her butt
Prepare for nat1's

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>>33726742
she can't even hide shadows in her cleavage anon

>>33726742
>>33726730

You guys have got your heads in the gutter!

Anyway, writing.

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>>33726742

>>33726742
Cleavage, shoes, gloves, skirt. Shax is a goblin, they're good at stowing stuff.

>>33726742
>Shax
>cleavage
Good one!

>>33726788
Wow, you certainly called it.

>>33726788
YOU BOW DOWN AND APOLOGIZE TO THE DICE GODS RIGHT THIS INSTANT.

Rolled 11

>>33726788
Wow.

Rolled 47

>>33726788
Definitive proof that the dice gods hate Shax being used for lewds.

>>33726797
Huh.

So THAT'S where she hides them.

>>33726797
>>33726849

Yall are temping fate, the Dice Gods will not be pleased at this sacrilege.

Rolled 15

>>33726958
It's okay. Shax has broken the curse. The real rolls will be good from now on.

>>33726990
Do not tempt the dice gods.

Ok, just got here and admittedly couldn't bear to read through all the FAIL... Just tell me the current game plan is to get our people back and then atomize this castle and every thing (corporeal or not) in it. It's all cursed.

Rolled 2

>>33727027
Except the mirror! Breaking mirrors is bad luck.

>>33727027
I don't know what everyone else wants, but that's damn well what I'll be voting for.

You were held in a bedroom, you figure that the rest are probably held in a bedroom, too! Your caravan of turtles and cybolds wreak havoc as you tear your way through the castle, smashing through walls and doors without regard for structural integrity. You're fed up with this whole place. It doesn't take you long to stumble into your gear, suiting yourself up and grabbing Blaise's axe and... maid outfit as well as Sitri's stuff before continuing your quest through the sleeping quarters. Finally, the large engraved doors of the master bedroom appear before you.

You personally hop down and cut the doors open and walk in. There is a large skeleton knight in the room. Blaise is tied up in some sorta shift on the bed. "I see you've come to rescue your friend, goblin. But beware! I am the strongest swordsman the great dark empire ever produced. Born from an orcish general and a human pitslave, never defeated in battle, I was trained to be-" You cut him off by charging at the guy. To his credit, he IS a really super good swordsman. But four laser turtles, half a dozen cybolds, a crab armed fishman cleric, an assortment of goblins, and a really angry girl with a very large sword prove too much for him, and he is quickly overwhelmed.

Untying Blaise, you get her maid outfit back on so no one could see her underwear with kitties on it. She takes her axe back with a stuttering thanks, and you ask her if she saw where the boss went.

"Of course I didn't, you dummy." She huffs, you huff back, "Sorry. I mean mistress. Still, there is only one place she can really be, isn't there? The throne room." Quickly, you grab a large silver mirro in the room before leaving.

With that in mind, you search for Sitri, finding her playing a flute in a bedroom for a bunch of ghosts who are listening in. "Oh, hey Shax. I think I charmed these guys."

"We're girls," The ghosts say, giggling.

Sitri frowns. "Of course."

>Go to the Throne Room in style!
>Who cares level the place.

>>33727233
>Go to the Throne Room in style!

Rolled 5

>>33727233
>Go to the Throne Room in style!

>>33727233
>Who cares level the place.
Fuck ghost ladies. Fuck ghost Throne Rooms. Fuck ghost castles.

>>33727233
>Who cares level the place!

>>33727233
>Who cares level the place.
If there is but a single speck of this castle left after we're through, we have not obliterated it hard enough.

>>33727233
>"We're girls," The ghosts say, giggling.

Yes.

>>33727233
>Go to the Throne Room in style!

We can level the place after.

If we don't get no loot it's a waste of time!

>>33727233
>>Go to the Throne Room in style!

>>33727233
>Who cares level the place.
Also, ditch/break the mirror, fuck that creepy fairy who sent you in here without a warning.

NEVER TRUST THE FAE

>>33727390
Dude, we've made a promise.

Breaking a fae promise is worse than trusting a fae.

>>33727233
>Go to the Throne Room in style!

First you pillage, then you burn.

>>33727233
>Go to the Throne Room in style!

>>33727439
We never promised that we wouldn't raid the kingdom afterwards though

>>33727439
Anon pointed out last thread that the binding promise was only to "Find the mirror." or something equally vague. We've done precisely that. We can safely smash it.

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>>33727233

>Go to the Throne Room in style!

Can't accidentally break the mirror

By which I mean loot

Can't accidentally break the loot

>>33727444
Dude, ALL the loot is Cursed. Capital "C" Cursed! It ain't worth the long term fuckery of hauling to some poor unsuspecting bastard to ditch it with.

>>33727496
I'm not convinced that any item we bring back from this place isn't going to fuck us over every time we try to use it. And half the time when we don't.

>>33727439
It's alright.
>>I'm sorry, don't yell at me. I wanted you to try and find my mother's mirror in the castle. It's a precious family heirloom. Pure silver, unicorns on the sides, and a roaring lion at the top. It would be hard to miss. Please?
We made no promise to give it to her. We only promised to find it, which we did.

>>33727439
We looked for it (not specifically but close enough). We didn't find it. Promise not broken.

Alright! Throne Room time! This is it. The last d20 check of this thread.

You can mess it up, it's okay. Just determines how flashy Shax's entrance is!

>>33727486
When? Did I skip a paragraph or something?

If we just level the place without finding it first we break our promise.

Rolled 16

>>33727542
fuck it

Rolled 1

>>33727542
Roll 1.

Rolled 6

>>33727542
Alright, let's see if the curse resurfaces.

Rolled 9

>>33727542

Rolled 17

>>33727542
Another nat 1 because fuck us

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>>33727583

>>33727583
yaaaaaaaaaaaay

>>33727543
We can find the bits of it in the rubble.

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>>33727583

>>33727583
I love this thread. Shax is baaarely competent.

>>33727583
I want off this ride.

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>>33727583
It's not even funny at this point, just frustrating.

Those ghost are fucking powerful. They cursed the thread.

Rolled 17

>>33727583
And after I rolled a 16 too...
Why do the dice gods ruin my fun.
;_;

>>33727637
Speak for yourself.

>>33727542
Please stop making us roll. You're killing us.

>>33727583
Eh, it's fine. Flashy entrances are dumb anyway.

>>33727583
I ain't even surprised or mad. We'll just add that much more vehemnce when we atomize the place.

>>33727543
We have the mirror anyway, don't we? We grabbed a large silver mirror when we got our stuff back.

Rolled 12

>>33727542

>>33727583

>That Crit fail on entry.

Of course.

>>33727657
Next time someone suggests we go to haunted *blank* we slap them.

>>33727637

No, it's pretty funny.

Rolled 13

>>33727674
Don't worry, when we someday get to important roll-well-or-die we'll roll well.

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Rolled 16

>>33727542
it is time

>>33727583
Let me guess, our entire party is already possessed?

>>33727583
Man Shax is going to cry so hard tonight.

>>33727692
>You're fed up with this whole place. It doesn't take you long to stumble into your gear, suiting yourself up and grabbing Blaise's axe and... maid outfit as well as Sitri's stuff before continuing your quest through the sleeping quarters. Finally, the large engraved doors of the master bedroom appear before you.

Where does it say that?

Rolled 15

>>33727718
next time, I don't upload long as gifs and just post

Rolled 4

we critfailed 4 of the 6 rolls this thread

>>33727743
Blaise can sit by the bed and hold her hand until she falls asleep, no problemo.

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>>33727583

Good thing this one wasn't important!

Writing.

>>33727743
It could be worse.

We coulda shown Allonces our lame side too

>>33727760
>"Of course I didn't, you dummy." She huffs, you huff back, "Sorry. I mean mistress. Still, there is only one place she can really be, isn't there? The throne room." Quickly, you grab a large silver mirro in the room before leaving.

It was actually when we found Blaise, my bad. But still, I'm -fairly- certain we have it.

>>33727767
I like how Blaise has gone from incompetent rival to more competent servant.

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its cause i mentioned the game, isn't it?
I'm sorry! I wasn't even sure how lewd I was going to make it!

Okay, why do people want to break the mirror beyond just being frustrated with our luck tonight and being spiteful for making a promise?

Even if we don't break a promise, we still piss of a fucking fairy.

>>33727809
This is what happens when you resist Destiny. All your rolls get penalized to ghosts and back.

>>33727809
And Shax has gone from competent rival to pretty much useless? Man I hope someone challenges us for the Chiefdom after this mess.

>>33727833
The fairy was blatantly scheming to use us. Some petty revenge is fine.