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>>34136338
Though you aren’t really thinking about that. You’re having trouble thinking about much right now, for you are Space Pirate Captain Valdessa Atroxius, leader of the fearsome space pirate crew of the Sol Regret, nemesis of the unkillable Admiral Kytan Graveside, bane of the Foliate Alliance, and inventor of titles for yourself. And right now, you are really hungover on homemade dryad moonshine, some of the strongest stuff the universe over.

Still, it could be worse. Your lovely first mate Cernucorra is currently sleeping soundly cuddled against you instead of abducted halfway across known space by some fernfaced asshole and treasure awaits you the moment you decide to finally get up from this surprisingly comfortable flowerbed thing you’ve found yourself on. Which might be a while, considering the pounding in your head and the leafy lover in your arms convincing you to stay right where you are.

>Carefully extricate yourself from Cernu and slip out
>Gently wake Cernu up and greet the day together.
>Five more minutes, dammit.
>Writein

>>34136352
Fuck yes, it's time!
>Five more minutes, dammit.
But first, relaxation.

>>34136352
>Carefully extricate yourself from Cernu and slip out


Good to see you finally back.

>>34136352
>Five more minutes, dammit.
Sure, we can get a slow start on the day.
What's on today's schedule anyway? It's been too long.

>>34136352
>Gently wake Cernu up and greet the day together.
I need payment for your brief disappearance in form of cuddling.
Then we can start to pirate it up.

>>34136352
Shit, I'm late.
>Five more minutes, dammit.

> Coordinates loaded
> Destination "Space Pirate Naga Quest" identified
> Preparing Jump!
WE'RE BAAAACK.

>>34136352
>>Gently wake Cernu up and greet the day together.
Nants ingonyama
Bagithi baba
Sithi uhhmm ingonyama

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The promise of getting one step closer to Scaly Dan’s lost treasure is almost enough to disentangle yourself from the mess of leaves and scales the two of you have made.

Almost.

Right now, the two of you have assumed what’s become your standard cuddling position, with you as the big spoon, Cernu as the little spoon, and your tail curved around and next to her with Cernu clutching it like a giant, scaly body pillow while the rest of your mass heaped over the two of you in a massive quilt of flesh. And really, you’re just way too cozy to justify getting up just yet, so instead you clutch your navigator a little tighter, nestle yourself back into the crook of her neck, and drift back to sleep with the tropical scent of her hair tingling on the tip of your forked tongue. Just five more minutes…

…Gentle fingers running lazily through your hair bring you back to the waking world. Cernu’s smiling face greets you as you open your eyes, somehow repositioning herself to a sitting position and pulling your head into her lap while you slept. As you go to speak, she slips a sliver of sliced fruit in your open mouth, her fingers lingering on your lips as she bids you to eat.

“A hangover cure.” She explained.

>”Well good morning to you too”
>”Feeling better today?”
>”This is nice, but we should probably get going.”
>Writein

>>34136718
>”This is nice, but we should probably get going.”

>>34136718
>>”This is nice, but we should probably get going.”
Glory awaits.

I wonder if we could make a mini-Cernu by putting one of her branches into a bowl of water.

>>34136718
>”Well good morning to you too”
No wonder leafbutt is the best. Anyway.
>”This is nice, but we should probably get going.”
Full steam ahead!

>>34136718
>”Well good morning to you too”
>”Feeling better today?”

>>34136782
...this bears investigation. We must know more.

>>34136782
>>34136831
Science? SCIENCE!

>>34136782
Somebody's been watching too much GoG

That said, while a Hyperdryad's consciousness is diffused throughout their entire being, it's concentrated mostly in the head. Were you to decapitate one and plant their head, it would regrow into their old self, but the body would just be sub-sentient brain matter and foliate muscle
However, such clippings are how the Foliate Alliance makes most of their computers and biotech, along with trees cultivated solely to grow ships, tanks, mechs, etc

Anyways, writing.

>>34136718
>"You really are the best lover a girl could ask for."
>”This is nice, but we should probably get going.”

>>34136848
>spoiler
So how DO they reproduce? Or is this a secret for now?

Also how have you been Capn? Hope things haven't been too stressful.

>>34136782
That's geni-
>>34136848
Awwww, buzzkill!
I've missed this quest.

>>34136940
>>34136848
Uwaaa~ ;___; I guess it can't be helped.

> GoG
What's that?

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You try to respond, only for her to shove another fruit in your mouth, and another after that before she lets you speak.

“Well good morning to you too, Cernu. You’re awfully insistent today”

You see a pang of guilt flash briefly across her eyes. “I…would hate for my captain to suffer from spending the night comforting me.”

As she gets lost in herself, your tail slips around her waist and hoists her into the air, eliciting a squeak of surprise from your first mate. You hold her upside down for a bit while readjusting yourself into a sitting position and plopping her down in front you and wrapping your arms around her chest, pulling her close until your naked chest is pressed tightly against her back. She may not have a heartbeat, but you can practically hear the rushing of fluids to and fro in her xylem and phloem as you kiss the base of her ears, your tongue occasionally flicking across the length and buzzing against the pointed tip.

“And what about you? Are you feeling better?”

“I…yes.” She manages between gasps. “You came for me. Across time and space you came for me. When you were all I desired, all I could hope for, you were there. Knowing that, I shall never fear the Alliance again.”

“What can I say, a captain looks out for her crew.” You quickly run your other hand across her other ear before pulling the two of you up. “Now c’mon, let’s go get dressed. Time’s a-wasting and we got an ancient treasure to plunder.”

Cernu has a little trouble standing on her own, but she follows you soon enough.

>>34137373
>you can practically hear the rushing of fluids to and fro in her xylem and phloem
TOO LEWD

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>>34137373
The elevator is even more cramped than usual with another person though thankfully neither you nor Cernu mind the lack of personal space and it’s because you’re so close to each other that you notice two tiny dark green spots on her neck.

“I bit you last night, didn’t I?”

She simply flashes you a playful smile.

“Several times. One does not kiss a snake if they fear the fangs. Do not worry, your drunken affections always clear up quickly.”

Right. Dryad regeneration. Still, you rub her neck in hopes of soothing whatever pain she may or may not feel.

“I really am lucky to have found you, leafbutt.”

“As am I, Captain Snakebutt.”

Before you can say object to the nickname, she pulls you into a kiss and holds it until the elevator doors open, bounding off with a smirk.

Koma gives you a questioning stare, no doubt an eyebrow would be raised if he had them.

>Right then, just move on to the bridge and pretend that didn’t happen. You’ve wasted enough time as it is.
>As tasty as those fruit slices were, you need to grab some real food real quick.
>Actually, you need to talk to Koma for a second. After everything you all have been through lately, you should make sure your ship and your mechs are all up to snuff.
>Writein

>>34136888
She puts her stamenae in our cloaca and bastes our horrifying naga ovaries in baby powder. Good thing we're different species.

>>34137396
>Right then, just move on to the bridge and pretend that didn’t happen. You’ve wasted enough time as it is.
No time to waste!

>>34137396
>Actually, you need to talk to Koma for a second. After everything you all have been through lately, you should make sure your ship and your mechs are all up to snuff.

Seems the wisest course of action. Gotta be prepared.

>>34137393
Please, anon.

>>34137417
PLEASE.

>>34137396
>>Right then, just move on to the bridge and pretend that didn’t happen. You’ve wasted enough time as it is

>>34136888
>So how DO they reproduce?
I haven't put too much thought into it.
One foliate species literally just scratches pollens from the male onto the female's headflowers in a sort of dandruff bukkake, but thankfully Cernu isn't a member of that species
>>34137226
>What's that?
Guardians of the Galaxy. Spoilers ahead, but what you said essentially happens word for word in the movie.

>>34137396
>As tasty as those fruit slices were, you need to grab some real food real quick.
Yum yum yum, it's grub time.

>>34137480
Hmmmm....
Guess we have a topic to ask her some later time then. Surely embarrassing enough.

>>34137417
>>34137468
You should see what she does with her carpel.

>>34137480
Huh. I see, I see. Haven't seen it yet, and my next movie visit might actually involve The Fault In Our Stars. Light preserve me.

A quick word with Koma, some grub to go, but from there it's straight to the bridge.

Writing.

>>34137396
>see if koma needs to order more parts while we're space vegas

>>34137535
Condolences Hex. Where do I send the funeral flowers when you're dead?

>>34137589
Huh, that's a good idea too.

>>34137480
>I haven't put too much thought into it.
You're on /tg/, what are you doing?! This is like elementary stuff to have ready in your setting notes.

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You both stand still for a moment, no sound between but the ambient hum of the ship passing between the two of you.

“So…” you manage with a forced, awkward cough and no response from the rock.

“We are probably going to be jumping again soon.”

Still nothing.

“You should probably make sure the Sol Regret and all the boarding mechs are shipshape.”

Nope.

“So…yeah. Get on that.”

“It’s a good thing you’re a pirate instead of a politician or a CEO, because you’re TERRIBLE at keeping a secret.” And with that, he lumbers on.

Cernu is SO going to pay for that one, that damned fruity little tart. Speaking of fruit tarts, you should probably grab something to eat on your way to the bridge. But not fruit tarts. You need something more substantial.

But unfortunately for you, all the mess hall had was some hot soup made out of some bizarre alien fruit that Lyka called a “tomato”, but at least you got a stack of those delicious smelling melted cheesebread sandwiches she made along with them. You slither up and plop yourself down in your chair before trying out the grub.

“So helmsman. Where is our spidery little friend today? It’s high time we take the rest of our plunder from her, wouldn’t you say?” Hey, this tomato stuff isn’t as fruity as you expected it to be! It goes great with the sandwiches too!

“I don’t think we’re chasin’ that scuzzer, cap’n. Unless she decided to fence the chip, maybe.”

“Nonsense, she still has part of the map. Where’s the block leading us to?”

Rosco hesitates and swallows hard before answering. “Gib…Gibs-12, cap’n.”

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>>34138139
“Gibs-12, huh?” You maneuver you sandwich into one of your cheeks so you can answer. “Aren’t you from there?”

“Y..Yes. Didn’t think I’d ever be seein’ it again…”

“Well great, you know the lay of the land and the ins and outs of the locals. It’ll be nice to have an easy run for once.”

“Easy. Right…”

“Right. Now prepare us for a jump, helmsman.”

“Y’sure that’s wiz, boss? Y’know, cuzza what happened last time.”

“Our navigator said it wouldn’t happen again, Rosco, or are you doubting the trust I have put into First Mate Yorocontria?”

“R-right boss, preparing for jump.”

“Good. And it’s captain.”

Thankfully, the jump went off without a hitch this time. No otherworldy screeches while stepping through the Dub, no Foliate Alliance armadas, and no kidnapped Cernus. After a second or two of compressed, smoky eternity, you arrive at your destination. None other than the Neon Jungle itself: Gibs-12. Home to ruthless capitalism, cutting edge cybernetics, and some of the funniest fashions and accents the how multigalatic sprawl over. Now you just had to comb the entire world for that reconfiguration chip and take it from whoever or whatever currently has it.

Simple enough.

>Just get Rosco to tap into the surveillance system like he did that one time with the FUB
>Grab some of your crew and start shaking down the locals
>Get Rosco to search the web for any Nagan artifact exhibits at local museums
>Writein

>>34138163
>Grab some of your crew and start shaking down the locals
This sounds most fun.

>>34137680
I got everything post coitus down, just nothing about the actual act.

>>34138163
>>Grab some of your crew and start shaking down the locals
>>Get Rosco to search the web for any Nagan artifact exhibits at local museums

>>34138163
>Get Rosco to search the web for any Nagan artifact exhibits at local museums
>Grab some of your crew and start shaking down the locals
Rosco better be glad Valdessa's miffed at Cernu right now, otherwise any insinuation she's not perfect might get him keelhauled.

Not that I know how you'd do that in space, but I'm sure Valdessa has a way.

>>34138163
>Grab some of your crew and start shaking down the locals
Oh yeah!

>>34138200
That's reasonable I suppose, though the characters themselves would have to know I'm sure /tg/ could go without said knowledge. You could even make it a running gag.

Writing.

>>34138163
>Get Rosco to search the web for any Nagan artifact exhibits at local museums

>>34138200
B-but that's the most important part!

>>34138312
It's only the fun part, anon. The miracle of life is its own reward.

By which I mean the concept of mini-dryads sounds adorable.

Who should we bring on our outing anyway? I figure Teaport and Rosco are good candidates unless we want to look inconspicuous.

>>34138529
*Texaport. Though I'm sad he doesn't dispense tea now.

>>34138529
No idea.
I know the cyber-mutants would fit right in though.

>>34138778
Certainly might be. I guess we'll see what next update delivers before deciding.

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You polish off the rest of your fruit soup in a few hearty gulps and get to work directing your crew. “Alright, so now that we’re here Rosco can just tap into the surveillance grid and find what we need like last time.”

“No can do, cap’n. This ain’t the Federation, everyone runs their own network and even if I did know which one to hit, I’m kinda…wanted here.”

“So? I’m wanted lots of places, but you don’t see that stopping me.”

“Trust me, cap’n, you don’t want me netdiving here. It’s kinda hard to explain.”

“Fine, then you can just come planetside with me and show me which locals to shake down for what I want to know.”

“That…wouldn’t be smart, cap. Let’s just say it’s best if I stay on the ship and leave it at that.”

Something’s really got him spooked. His usual arrogant braggart self has been replaced with the bashful little techie in front of you. It’s enough to make you forget your anger at his stubbornness.

“It’s not like I have another Gibs-12 native techie, Rosco.”

“That would be me, cap’n.”

Toshka is standing in the doorway, her usual tanktop and loose pants replaced with a slick pinstriped business suit and shiny black shoes, half of a tinted sunglasses covering her still organic eye and slotting into the socket of her tri-scoped cybernetic one, a sleek smartpistol in one hand and the sleeve of her business suit cut off at the forearm on her other arm, revealing a mess of machinery all laid out on a deck socketed into her cybernetic arm. Completing the ensemble is a single pouch strapped to her thigh.

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>>34138982
“I may not be the wizhead that Rosco is, but I got contacts topside and once we know our target, you’ll find me pretty shiny when it comes to brute forcin’ the front door.”

That settles that, you suppose.

“Fine then, Toshka comes with me and Rosco can, I don’t know, look up local museums on the internet or something. Just do SOMETHING, because I didn’t hire you to just sit there and look pretty. If I did, I’d be wanting my money back right now.”

Normally he would have something snarky to say right about now, but he just sort of sits there and takes it, swiveling back around and tapping away at his computer. Damn, now you actually feel kind of bad for the little human. Now, what do about the rest of your away party? You probably shouldn’t take more than five lest you look suspicious, so that leaves three others to bring with you.

>Roger Padstow. He may not know the ins and outs of Gibsian culture, but he’ll do just fine in a fight.
>Doctor Lorelei Lynn. She may be kind of sort of incredibly creepy and insane, but a field medic is always good to have on hand, especially one that can still operate after being decapitated.
>One or more of the Mechaniacs. They’ll have to leave their mech behind, but crazy and trigger happy is always handy in any sort of situation (this will open up a subvote to choose which ones).
>Cernu may not be the best with a gun, but she’s resourceful and persuasive. Crafty, too.
>Engineer Koma Tito. Durable, easygoing, and a master of machines. No doubt he could be of some use on a planet full of computers and machinery, even if he is largely pacifistic.
>Writein.

>>34138982
My, how dashing!

>>34139003
>One or more of the Mechaniacs. They’ll have to leave their mech behind, but crazy and trigger happy is always handy in any sort of situation (this will open up a subvote to choose which ones).
Yes!

>>34139003
>Engineer Koma Tito. Durable, easygoing, and a master of machines. No doubt he could be of some use on a planet full of computers and machinery, even if he is largely pacifistic.
We can fight for everyone.

>>34139003
I should have made it more clear: pick three from that list.
>>34139008
Is that a vote for three Mechaniacs?

>>34139003
>Doctor Lorelei Lynn. She may be kind of sort of incredibly creepy and insane, but a field medic is always good to have on hand, especially one that can still operate after being decapitated.
The doc is my kind of character.
>One or more of the Mechaniacs. They’ll have to leave their mech behind, but crazy and trigger happy is always handy in any sort of situation (this will open up a subvote to choose which ones).
>Roger Padstow. He may not know the ins and outs of Gibsian culture, but he’ll do just fine in a fight.

>>34139003
Iii don't really have a huge preference here. I just know bring one or two mechanias, and the rest specialists.

Maybe bring koma.

>>34139053
Sure is!

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>>34139053
Or specify that you want a smaller party. Damn I am forgetting all sorts of prompts today.
>>34138394
Mini-dryads may still very well be a thing, both Shinki sized adult bonsai dryads and babby dryads, they just won't be something you should worry about at the moment.

>>34139003
>Cernu may not be the best with a gun, but she’s resourceful and persuasive. Crafty, too.
Gotta have the waifu.
>Roger Padstow. He may not know the ins and outs of Gibsian culture, but he’ll do just fine in a fight.
Reliable.
>Doctor Lorelei Lynn. She may be kind of sort of incredibly creepy and insane, but a field medic is always good to have on hand, especially one that can still operate after being decapitated.
Entertaining.

>>34139091
>>34139036 here, I just mis-read, but I'm actually fine with a 3-person party too. Easier to blend in.

So far I got
3 votes for Mechaniacs
2 votes for Koma
2 votes for Roger
2 votes for Lorelei
1 vote for Cernu

So a Mechaniac is locked in, but can we come to a consensus for the other two?

Those who don't make the cut will also have an upcoming role or two to play, so don't think not choosing them shoves them under the carpet for this episode.

>>34139241
Hmmm, I think Lorelei is kinda a potential liability, so not sure about bringing her. No preference in terms of beringing one or two mechanics really, but I guess one for variety, and then both Koma and Roger?

>>34139241
I guess >>34139307 is fine. Muh Cernu...

>>34139307
Looks like no one else has any say on the matter, so I guess Koma and Roger it is.

Shame, Lorelei would've been fun.

>>34139382
Guess people quit paying attention after leaving their votes or something.

>>34139409
I don't blame, seeing as I usually take like 30-40 minutes to update.

>>34139427
Eh, still. I like speculating in the thread but it feels kinda empty in here after anons are done voting.

>>34139470
I just have no real preference on party composition.

>>34139644
Still nice to help OP, backing someone else if nothing else.
Not saying YOU didn't, but obviously some didn't.

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You don’t know what you’re going to face down on Gibs-12 but you do know you’ll want your two most reliable men on the job. Roger has been in the pirating business for so long that a couple of chromed up whackos can’t show him anything he hasn’t already seen and Koma is immovable and unshakeable like a, well, like a rock.

However, you still need a wildcard. Someone just crazy enough to show anyone looking to cross you that you play for keeps. One of the Mechaniacs will fill that role quite nicely, but the question remains which one?

There’s Grayson. No one knows why he wears the mask. Or what he is even trying to say with all that grunting and gesticulating. Or how he eats, for that matter. That last one really bugs you. He also seems to be the least human of the bunch, with faster regenerative qualities than the rest and more unknown organs and organic masses than even Lorelei can properly document. Speaking of, he is also the mad doctor’s favorite test subject and seems to actually look forward to their “vivisection dates” as she calls them. If you want mystery, look no further than this guy. Uses a nifty little chainsaw sword he invented himself whenever he isn’t shooting people.

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>>34139833
Of course, Full Otto is always handy in a fight. A gun nut amongst gun nuts, there is nothing Otto loves more than wasting ammo and blasting away his foes. He even replaced one of his arms with a massive chaingun, too. Not because his arm was missing or anything, but because he just never wanted to not be able to pump something full of hot death. He is pretty talkative for a Mechaniac, giving overly verbose speeches whenever he is allowed to gun anything down. In fact, it’s hard to get him to shut up whenever he gets going.

You might also get some use out of Johnny Nitro, the speed freak extraordinaire. So obsessed with speed that he replaced his mech’s legs with a single wheel on a stalk and implanted turbo boosters in his own body that allow him to skid around wherever he pleases as he assaults foes with his shotgun or his “beatstick”. Unfortunately, he doesn’t say much other than variations of “gotta go fast” and making motorcycle noises with his mouth.

So, who’ll it be?

>Grayson, the enigmatic
>Full Otto, the gunner
>Johnny Nitro, the speedster
>Make your own mechaniac

>>34139855
I like all of them.
I'm going with johnny nitro for now, based entirely on gut instinct.

>>34139855
>Johnny Nitro, the speedster
Speed sounds good to have.

Johnny it is.

Writing.

>>34139855
>motorboat not made for the ocean
Groovy

>>34139855
>Grayson, the enigmatic
Gotta have this crazy guy when doc didn't get in.

>>34140015
You close votes pretty fast huh

>>34140058
I can wait a little longer, I just didn't see many people voting earlier so I figured about 10 minutes would be enough.

>>34140091
Well it's not a huge thing, but there has been 4+ voters consistently so if only 2 have voted and it's been 7 minutes it seems a bit fast...

>>34140115
Fair enough, I can wait another 5. It just seemed like people were getting bored with party selection so I was trying to move things along.

Current count is 1 for Grayson and 2 for Johnny, so if anybody wants anything different, vote now.

>>34140153
Johnny is fine, we can go with him. I was thinking of trying to make one but my inspiration won't come today.

>>34140153
I guess you're right about the party-selection stuff.

Looks like Johhny still has it.

Writing.
>>34140199
Feel free to go ahead even now that the vote is closed. If I like him enough he might show up in later threads.

Oh, we're back! Time to molest the salad

>>34140333
I'm afraid we left the salad behind for now, but I'm sure the opportunity will arise again soon enough.

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Megacity means mega roads, which means having someone who loves nothing more than going fast should come in handy. Not to mention all the rest of the Mechaniacs are more likely to stay and fight instead of running away should you find yourself in a bind. With your away team finally all set, your ship makes touchdown in the sector of the massive, overgrown city Rosco designated.

“I was able to dig some stuff up while doing some surface skims.” Rosco informs you while the lot of you suit up. By which you mean you and Roger, since Toshka is already suited up, Koma never wears more than his pants and bandanna and never carries more than his wrench, and Johnny is just running around with arms outstretched making fighter ship noises. “You ain’t gonna find any museums on Gibs-12 on account of them getting heisted all the time, but looks like we do got a collector of old Nagan relics in this district by the name of Floyd Stryx. Rumors have it he recently snagged hisself a motherload, but I couldn’t get nothin’ more specific than that or his whereabouts other than his place is fortified to all hell without diving deep enough to get myself tracked, but at least you got a start. Even if he doesn’t got it, he oughta know who does.”

“Not bad, Rosco. Now Toshka, what was your plan?”

“Know a gang of runners down south a ways called the Last Dinosaurs. We put up the cash, they’ll roll any joint we tell em to no matter how suicidal.”

Rosco’s voice protests over the intercom “You can’t be serious, Toshka, those guys are biosaurs! They’ll-”

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>>34140853
“They’ll do whatever we tell em to and they owe me a favor.” Toshka interrupts. “We need either them or you if we want crack open a mark.”

With Toshka’s ultimatum answered only with silence, you head out. But what’s the plan?

>Lure Floyd in by selling off some of those Nagan artifacts you stole from that archaeologist ship. Have Toshka make contact with the Last Dinosaurs in order to make arrangements for the heist.
>Go with Toshka to make contact with the Last Dinosaurs, send a…less conspicuous group to go play stuck-up businessman with Floyd.
>Just make contact with the Last Dinosaurs first and foremost. You can make more extensive plans after you know what you’re dealing with.
>Writein

>>34140872
Hmm.
Let's visit the dinos first, and then we'll pull our artifact scales scam. Which might not be a scam. he might just sort of trade his map artifact for our non-map artifacts. Dinosaurs first though.

>>34140872
>Just make contact with the Last Dinosaurs first and foremost. You can make more extensive plans after you know what you’re dealing with.
Info, info, info.

>>34140872
>Just make contact with the Last Dinosaurs first and foremost. You can make more extensive plans after you know what you’re dealing with.
I don't trust anyone in our party playing businessmen to be honest.

>>34140872
>Lure Floyd in by selling off some of those Nagan artifacts you stole from that archaeologist ship. Have Toshka make contact with the Last Dinosaurs in order to make arrangements for the heist.
We can meet Floyd with Roger and send the rest off to see the LD.

Time to go see some dinos.

Writing.

>>34141168
I can't wait!

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“First things first, we’re going to have to pay a little visit to these Last Dinosaurs of Toshka’s. I don’t know what a “Biosaur” is, and I don’t like blindly rushing into things.”

Even Johnny Nitro coughs awkwardly at that.

“Oh just call them up and arrange a meeting already! As for the rest of you, just stay put for now. Rosco can put out some feelers on who buys old stuff around here. Let’s play this one safe for now, so no one do anything stupid.”

“We would never dream of stealing your job, my captain, nor do I believe any of us have the knack for it that you do.”

Note to self: check the salinity of the soil in the Green Room because damn your girl is getting salty. Still, it’s good to see her in good spirits again after all the dreariness of recent events. You make another note to pay her back for that one, but Toshka already arranged a meeting place with the Last Dinosaurs and you’re much too in plundering mode to give Cernu a proper punishment, so it’ll have to wait for later.

You’ve never been a big fan of public transportation. You can never get a comfortable seat with the nonstandard configuration of your species, everyone always steps on or trips over your tail, no matter how tightly you coil around yourself, and you always end up with cramped muscles from forcing yourself into an uncomfortable position. You take small comfort in the fact that the maglev train is fast enough that you’ve reached your destination in less than fifteen minutes.

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>>34141723
You’d have thought that passengers would give your party a wide berth thanks to the hobo with a gun that is Roger and the crazy guy wearing scrap metal and a grimy pilot’s mask that can barely sit still, but your crew actually fit in abnormally well with the Gibsians surrounding you to the point where you are crammed into the very corner of the seating module.

Your destination can't come soon enough, even if it is a dingy old diner whose name has been lost to the layers of grime and rust covering its sign, though the lights in the window still shines the word “Open” in glaring neon to the outside world, lost amidst the sea of similar lights around it. You’re hardly paying attention, though, still trying to work out all the kinks and pins and needles in your tail.

“Here we are.” Toshka announces. “Don’t make any sudden movements, but don’t be too still either. The King doesn’t like it when people freeze up around him.”

With that word of advice, you slither up to the doors and push them open – forcefully, but not too suddenly, and find yourself surrounded by a bunch of scaly bipeds decked out in what was probably cutting edge military gear a few decades ago, but is now faded and carbon-scored. Behind the bar, a disinterested Basidian works the grill, his gills sighing in boredom from his red-domed, fungoid head.

>”Which one of you is The King?”
>Let Toshka do the talking
>Just order some food and play it cool
>Writein

>>34141723
Cernu is getting too sassy. Do we gotta 'punish' her?
Anyway, time for space-venture!
>>34141751
>Let Toshka do the talking
We know THAT much at least.

>>34141751
>Just order some food and play it cool
>Let Toshka do the talking

>>34141751
>>Let Toshka do the talking
>>Just order some food and play it cool
Of course we have to try dinosaur food.

After that, if toshka has gained no results, THEN we ask who the king is.

>>34141751
>Let Toshka do the talking
But look like we know what we're doing. It's vitally important.

>>34141751
>Just order some food and play it cool
Forget work, time for gourmet-quest.
Also gotta sleep, so thanks for running!

You writing OP? Just wanna make sure you're not ded.

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You give a Toshka a single pat on the shoulder as you make your way to the bar and start ordering something. Two of the twelve foot tall behemoths glare at you when you take a seat between them, but you pay them no mind, instead ordering the biggest, meatiest meal on the menu. With a side of hash browns. Extra large hashbrowns smothered, scattered, topped, popped, and ringing all the way.

“Didn’t you just eat?” Koma asks, loafing at a nearby table, with a mug of coffee somehow already in hand. You gotta give him credit, he’s damned good at the drifter routine.

“You can complain when you’re as big as me and have as active of a body as mine. Besides, it’s not like I can just grab some rocks off the road and cram em in my mouth whenever I get hungry.”

“Rather discriminatory of you, captain.”

“Then what DO you eat?”

“…rocks, mostly. But I like a good hot dog from time to time too.”

While this pointless exchange was going on, the largest of the Dinosaurs rose from his table and plodded slowly towards Toshka while she held her arms out wide, palms facing the Biosaur and fingers held apart (an old Gibsian greeting, to show that you weren’t hiding anything) as he did the same to her.

“Well if it isn’t the littlest Pylarian. What brings you back to our lovely little shithole of a planet?” His voice grumbled out and filled the whole restaurant all at once, killing the idle chatter around him.

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>>34142564
“Ay yo, King. S’been a while.” His massive hand engulfed Toshka’s own in an enthusiastic handshake.

“A while indeed! Found some better company than your old gang, I take it?”

“I’d ask you the same, but it looks like you’re still hanging on to the sorry old lot whose asses I yanked out of the fire back at Roderick & Sons.”

King lets out a hearty guffaw that echoes harshly around you and ends in a growl, still grasping Toshka’s hand, though the ‘shake’ part of the handshake seemed to have ended and moved on to the part where they clamp down on each others’ hands while holding a staring contest.

“Don’t forget why we were at Roderick’s in the first place. Speaking of, I do not see your puny little friend anywhere.”

“He’s sittin’ this one out.” Toshka can’t well squeeze back, but she is enduring King’s own vicelike grip just fine as they glare at each other from behind their respective horns.

“Oho! So you do still drag the little trode jockey about?”

“We got a job for you. Do you want it or not?”

“We?”

>Time to make your grand entrance into the conversation.
>You’re not quite sure what is going on, but Toshka knows what she’s doing. Maybe.
>Things are getting too hot, time to pull out.
>Writein

>>34142462
Yeah sorry about that. Forgot to announce that I was writing.

>>34142579
>You’re not quite sure what is going on, but Toshka knows what she’s doing. Maybe.
We'll wing it. I bet Valdessa is an expert on that.

>>34142579
Let's wave to indicate we are here and with toshka, but otherwise let her continue talking.

When it comes time to explain the plan, well, we're getting a specific artifact. By whatever means we can. Plan A is artifact trade, plan B. is mugging him mid-trade for it, plan C. is following him post trade to take it from his house, plan D is wing it.

>>34142579
>Time to make your grand entrance into the conversation.

>>34142627
No biggie, just get used to it when you do is all.

>>34142579
I'll back >>34142705, continue at her pace. And the plan is pretty good too though I imagine the locals might be able to craft a better one.

Looks like you guys want to let Toshka do her thing, but nonvocally let her know you're on standby if needed.

Writing.

>>34142800
Sounds good to me! It's nice to see competent minions doing work. Brings a tear to me eye, it does.

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Having finished your meal, you swivel your barstool around, eyeing Toshka to let her know you’re ready to take over whenever she needs you.

“Yeah, we. Found myself new work, just like you said. Nice gig, too. No more double crosses, no more Sanitation Committee, no more watchin’ my back over old grudges. Side from that, it’s more of the same ol’. My employer is right over there, if you’re lookin’ for work.”

Toshka nods towards you, her horn working as well as any finger to point you out, causing the gang leader to march over to you. His massive frame towers over your fleshy half, and he looks down on you.

“So this is the one who took little Tosh into the stars.”

You calmly rise up from your barstool and onto your tail until you’re eye level with him and stick out your hand. You could’ve kept on rising past him and looked down on him as he did you, but you get the feeling that remaining eye-to-eye with him will bother him more than you showing off. Plus straining yourself on a full stomach is never fun.

“Captain Valdessa Atroxius of the ruthless space pirate vessel the Sol Regret, defiant of the Gatoran Empire, plunderer of lost treasures, and humilator of the Foliate Alliance, charmed to make your acquaintance. This is the first time I’ve ever met royalty.”

He gives you the same crushing handshake he gave Toshka, making you exceedingly grateful for how rubbery and flexible Nagan bones are.

“Cute. Captain Rex is my actual name and rank. Scuzzers started calling me the King once I defected and set up shop in the underworld.”

“Well then Rexm from one captain to another: how would you like to help me pillage some rich bastard’s home and take everything of value from it?”

You could swear you saw his scaly mouth grin at that one.

END OF THREAD NINE

Thanks for participating, everyone! Next thread will probably be Saturday.

Stay tuned for Dinoheists!

>>34143265
Thanks for running! Was fun indeed.

>>34143265
Well, I missed the first part, but good run.

>>34143290
Thanks for the thread. Looking forward to another one so soon, got proper withdrawal-symptoms man.

Thread archived and good to go.
>>34143326
Yeah, I really didn't want to do that to you guys, but every time I make a commitment to anyone, a dozen more pressing matters crop up on the same day.

>>34143380
Well, we'll see about dinoheists soon, hopefully.
We've even got a getaway driver!

I've also been considering getting an ask.fm for questions like >>34136782.

Would there be any interest in that?

>>34143265
Alright, time for the important questions.
- How long have we been a captain anyway? It's probably come up at some point but I forget. For that matter, what's our age?
- What exactly does a Spindleman look like and why are they the best?
- If Lyka entered a chef's competition, how badly would the gourmet tasters' tastebuds be scarred and could Valdessa pay the reparations if she wanted to (obviously they'd just flee the scene but you know).
- How did Lorelei manage to get onto the crew and why was it though blackmail/threats/force?
- Is Cernu's butt really leafy, or just generally planty? Can we spank it for her smart-ass comments?
- For that matter, who's the kinkiest of or brave couple?
- How quickly will this Floyd guy see through /tg/'s no doubt hilarious attempts at conning him if we try? Can we make it in the front door?
- Does Koma wear pajamas to sleep, in stark contrast to his spartan daily wear?

Tune in next thread for more essential questions.

>>34143446
I never use the things! But apparently some people like that stuff.

Only time I'd use it would be to bother you if the threads have been running dry.

>>34143446
Honestly? It's kinda cozy to have questions in-thread, and I'm not sure you'll get enough of them to warrant an ask.fm. But your choice.

>>34143521
Capn we will not rest until Lyka's gastronomic prowess is bared for all to see.

>>34143521
>- How long have we been a captain anyway? It's probably come up at some point but I forget. For that matter, what's our age?
I can't answer the second yet, but you've been captain since you were about 17. Your original crew was just you, Cernu, and Roger Padstow.
>- What exactly does a Spindleman look like
I imagine them as something sort of like the Cloverfield monster or one of those Dug things from Star wars with an extra set of arms and all pale and spindly like a Kaminoan. They're kinda like if an orangutan had a six-armed baby with Slenderman and an ant.

They move either by pulling themselves along in Zero G with their four arms or by knuckle walking around like an orangutan since their feet are just as dextrous as their hands. I really wish I could draw and show you guys, but my main goal with these guys was to design something made to live not just in space, but in the cramped, narrow corridors of spaceships, hence the slender, flexible frames and ease of Zero G travel.
>why are they the best?
Because they were built to be the best by an ancient, forgotten race. They've been engineered from the top down, the bottom up, the inside out, and the diagonal turn-ways to keep ships moving and nothing else. They're so good at it that they've not only been keeping an eons old massively complex planet sized spaceship that no one else even knows the first thing about not only in stable orbit, but slowly repairing it over the course of time.

Essentially, they're spess autists. Like Jokaero from 40K, but slightly easier to communicate with.

>>34143521
>>34144206
>- If Lyka entered a chef's competition, how badly would the gourmet tasters' tastebuds be scarred and could Valdessa pay the reparations if she wanted to (obviously they'd just flee the scene but you know).
Lyka is actually an amazing cook. Her attitude may be sour and bitter, but her cooking is always spot on, even if the ingredients can be bizarre.

Trust me, Valdessa loves her mealtimes. She wouldn't tolerate a cook who didn't know what they were doing.
>- How did Lorelei manage to get onto the crew and why was it though blackmail/threats/force?
She didn't blackmail anyone, she just sort of...appeared one day, experimenting on the Mechaniacs. She turned out to be a really good doctor (so long as you are very firm on what is allowed to go in or come out of your body whenever she is operating) and since she doesn't require payment, instead working for the "love of the sport", Valdessa let her stay since she didn't expect her SUPERIOR NAGA PHYSIQUE to get injured much. Val doesn't really like visiting her, but a lot of that is due to a deep seated fear of organ harvesters as well as general unease around doctors. Lorelei being crazy doesn't help any of these issues much either.

The only one who really blackmailed their way on to the crew is Cernu and that's a bit of a long story I'm still working on writing out for you guys.
>- Is Cernu's butt really leafy, or just generally planty?
A little bit of both. She's got a bit of an in-built leaf skirt like in >>34137373, but a bit more form-hugging that can roll up to reveal her plantbutt. She can also peel away or prune the leafier bits of her body with no real issue if she ever wants to be even MORE naked.

Also of note is that her fingers and toes are completely devoid of any sort of nails, making them feel almost like soft gloves rather than hands.

>>34143521
>>34144226
>Can we spank it for her smart-ass comments?
And how! You know that skirt thing I just mentioned? It rolls up when you do
>- For that matter, who's the kinkiest of or brave couple?
>- How quickly will this Floyd guy see through /tg/'s no doubt hilarious attempts at conning him if we try? Can we make it in the front door?
You just hired some 12 foot tall cyborg dinosoldiers. Subtlety isn't exactly your strong suit.

That said, you'll just have to wait and see.
>- Does Koma wear pajamas to sleep, in stark contrast to his spartan daily wear?
No, but he does sleep with a stuffed animal.

>>34143551
>It's kinda cozy to have questions in-thread, and I'm not sure you'll get enough of them to warrant an ask.fm.
I'm with you on both accounts, I just wanted to know what I could do for you dear players.

>>34144206
>engineered
So they were designed to pilot/maintain ships? But what about new ship-models, evolutions in technology, etc?
>>34144226
>organ harvesters
Bad shit man.
>>34144253
>Stuffed animal
Approved then.

Thanks for the answers Capn. Even if you conspicuously missed an answer there.

>>34144308
>So they were designed to pilot/maintain ships?
Essentially
>But what about new ship-models, evolutions in technology, etc?
Aside from their progenitors being really far and beyond average tech when it comes to complex ships, they have a sort of intuitive shipsense that allows them to maintain just about any ship they find themselves on.
>Even if you conspicuously missed an answer there.
Whoops, I forgot all about answering that one since I was jumping back and forth between them.

Cernu is more inventive with various vines and whatnot, but Valdessa is more...intense. She is very thankful for a lover with no bones to break and highly regenerative skin that she can hug and lovebite as much as she pleases without fearing them breaking.

>>34144506
Hmmm, guess that's the benefit of designed species.

LEW-oh wait. That makes sense then.

Sleeping now, night.

>>34144563
Night.