Do not - I repeat, do not - have sex in the warp.

I don't care if the XO is Illustran, and in heat, and ready to snap you in half - it's better to wind up in medbay than...

Look, just trust me.

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>>34551627
Well, glad I didn't make that thread after all.

>People consider married crew members on board bad luck, for some ships are considered jealous.
>Others think it brings good luck to the ship, and that if two would be wed, that it is the Captain's duty to marry them.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9RVTvwZUAyM
Also, whoever linked the Carmen Miranda songs, thanks for making my night.

>they say to be extra careful when flushing your space toilet. They say it has enough power to pull you down and eject you into the black

On a maiden voyage:

Every navigator has a pocket full of soil or rocks from their specie's home planet, So they can find their way home.

Every engineer carries a piece of an old, reliable ship. Dependability is catching.

ATTN: ALL EMPLOYEE CREW MEMBERS
SUBJ: SUPERSTITIONS
It has come to our attention that many of our employees crewing company owned and operated ships have been practicing various "superstitious" activities that result in dirt, paint and even bodily fluids sprayed around or on the ship along with time consuming ceremonies done on company time. These infractions, costing company time and often expensive space dock cleaning will cease immediately or you will face immediate termination and forfeiture of all company benefits.

And remember, a productive employee is a paid employee.

End of Line.

>>34551741

I'm adding in a feature to one of the species in my setting - an arboreal race, which had always carried a piece of their hometree with them whenever they traveled. When, in turn, they developed FTL, the first ship had at its heart a sapling grown from the Hometree, as part of its 02 conversion system. The ship, itself, was named Hometree.

After it was decommissioned, each of the line of new ships they struck was made with at least one piece of the original - and when those ships are decommissioned, at least one piece of each of them is put into one of the next ships.

Their ships have registry numbers, but only one name. Hometree. All saplings of the same ship.

>>34551828

This was the last public release by Yang-Calvin Industries. While none can say that the series of Imperial Revenue Service audits, subsequent liquidation of the company, and death of a full half of the board of directors in the Tyris line crash over the Sea of Tranquility, other such freight companies have been quick to relax their own standards on... "cultural observance."

>>34551627
The "Bucket," as she is known to her crew, has gone for 74 days without any apparent fuel or activity from her sublight engine core. Her warp core has read as being on since the crew joined her, although the ship's engineers have yet to actually find it. The space where it should be is simply bulkhead flush with the wall. The ship's supplies have been showing spoilage much earlier than their packaging indicates. The cook blames the foul green stains upon the deck plates of the pantry, though there is no sign of unusually high microbe counts in the space. The stains are similar to those in the cargo bay, where tools and containers left sitting on top begin to corrode after a few days. The cook often finds himself cooking one additional meal when he is making the crew's food. The working cameras in the kitchen show him making a solitary meal for himself two weeks ago. He doesn't appear on camera again for 16 hours. He refuses to speak of this event.

>>34551868
> over the Sea of Tranquility, were caused by this stance...*

I'm an idiot.

>>34551871

"The Lady of... the Bucket, I mean? She's a good ship. I just... look. You can't repeat this, alright? I know this is bar talk, but I've got a reputation as an engineer."

"Look. I've gone over the design spec for her class. I've gone through the ship's logs. I know what should be possible. Their are two doors in my quarters; one leads to the adjoining head with the XO's, and one leads to the hallway. The 'east' wall is nothing but two feet of bulkhead, and then the Black."

"... except not always. Sometimes, there's a third door. It's always locked, and I don't know if I would want to open it."

"What? No, no, I don't think it leads out. James, I can hear something on the other side of the door. And..."

"It's sobbing, James. And it sounds just like Claire."

>>34551627
>Hand gestures in Spacer societies are almost entirely non-existent due to the threat of accidentally pressing something. Body language as a whole in fact is very subdued, and has been replaced with a sort of "short hand" combining the tilt of one's head and the tone of one's voice to convey different social interactions from embarrassment to contempt to greeting an old friend.

>Staring out a window or viewing port during warp travel can cause powerful hallucinations, most of which range from benign to downright intoxicating and euphoric. The resulting coma that comes from it lasts a few days, and is known as being "blissed off"

>It is considered bad luck to ever ride in a ship that has an engine that's never been used on a voyage before. Which begs the question how any engine ever made any voyage, if people are so paranoid about it. But, that's all part of the conspiracy, see?

>In some cultures, a dedicated and long-lasting crew have reinforced vials strung around their neck filled with ashes- each pinch of ash is from a cremated crewmate, who they keep with them in spirit and for luck. Every member of the crew carries a part of all those that were lost before them, or at least the ones that mattered most to them.

>Getting the name of any ship tattooed on you for any reason is considered bad luck, because IT will share YOUR fate.

There should be more of this stuff based off of old filk songs.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UqU7W8LdRd4
Sometimes, those in dire situations will have visions of old spacers, urging them to keep trying, to keep fighting, lest they share the same fate.

Never enter a ship that doesn't have a piece of green growing on it. Yes, that includes ships that don't technically need plants for air, in fact especially those.

Check the captain's quarters and the machine room. If neither has AD ASTRA PER ASPERA written somewhere you might as well look for another job.

While seen as backwards, most ships still carry at least one religious text from old earth with them. When dealing with the unknown, you shouldn't deny any help you can get, you see?

The first person to sit in a captain's chair is traditionally a pregnant woman or a child. In case neither is available, a potted bonsai is used.

Nobody but the ship technician is allowed to see or touch the hyper drive before the ship's maiden voyage. While this is usually explained away as a means to avoid tampering, the amount of care taken up an including welding all doors shut does seem a little excessive.

Yes, that means most hyper drive tests are run by the master of engines, rather than the factory that assembles the ship. There's a reason they often say that engineers are married to their ships.

Exactly 10 grams of the first engineer's ashes are kept in an urn in the engine room after his or her death. After all, they have to guide their successors and soothe the machines should they rebel out of grief for their first love.

Speaking of love: Don't ever bring your SO to the engine room. It bodes ill to make the machine see it's on a time sharing schedule.

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>'Up' is when the planets orbit counter-clockwise. Now as for clocks...

>Micro meteoroids are good luck - if you have shielding.

>People who play dice in micro gravity always cheat.

>Species that still /make/ in their suits should not be burdened with complex concepts of interstellar society. It never ends well.

Can I put forward a question I can't think of anything for? Why are snipers considered bad luck to be around onboard military ships.

>>34552052

The sniper isn't a group operator - he's a fireteam guy. Him and his spotter go out into the wilderness, find death, and might be lonely enough for company to invite him back to the mess to swap shop talk.

>>34551931
"Carson? Look, it's me again. I want to talk. Can you open the door?"

...

"I know you can hear me, you warpbrain. I'm just going to start talking because I need to talk to someone, you know?"

"I was at my post in the engine room. Yeah, I know. What am I looking after? The engine that doesn't work or the warp drive that isn't there? Anyway."

"I heard her again, man. I fucking swear it was Clarise."

"It-I mean--my wife and I were devastated, you know? She was too young. No parent should..."

"Wait. I think I hear-- singing? It's coming from down the hall, put some damn pants on and come with me."[fading]

[two minutes of silence]

"Hey Carson, you awake? It's time for your shift. Engineering was nice and quiet. I left the seat warm for you. Carson?"

>>34552052
In addition, if we're talking on a space military ship, the sniper would have a high caliber weapon probably capable of breaching or at least damaging the hull. That is always a BAD IDEA.
You want to arm people in ships with frangible rounds, and chemical or technological stunning weapons. Two examples I use in my scifi universe are a gun that superheats a small resin block and fires the "plasma" at targets, which is like throwing molten plastic soldiers on somebody's face. Only worse.
The other is something I call the "fool's crown" which is clamped to somebody's neck, behind the ears. Then it uses sonic output and slight vibrations to irritate the inner ear canal and distort somebody's sense of balance. Side effects are stumbling and falling constantly, usually in addition to handcuffs, which make it hard to resist law enforcement etc manhandling you. Additional side effect is... throwing up. Which makes it twice as disorienting, usually, when you aren't adjusted to constantly retching up your guts.

>>34552124
Physician's log, 15 March 486

The crew appears to be physically fit, same as last week. Security Officer Olutuye cut his hand on the edge of a container in the cargo hold. It's infected, but the antibiotics should have started clearing it up right away.

The crew appears to be growing increasingly paranoid over the past week. By some unspoken agreement, nobody will open the doors to their quarters during shipboard night hours. I overheard the helmsman talking about ghosts knocking on doors, and I think her word is affecting everyone's mood.

>>34551932
>Getting the name of any ship tattooed on you for any reason is considered bad luck, because IT will share YOUR fate.
Conversely, it is considered good luck to get a tattoo of the figurehead, crest, or sigil of the first ship you crewed, especially for navigators.

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Can anyone think of some way to make the NasaGhast less silly?

I like the idea of them protecting those lost in space, but they seems so comical no mater how i try to re-fluff them (there from the webcomic Dr McNinja)

>>34553229
Remove everything but the base idea and rebuild them. Web comics are mostly made to be re-shared on social networks so it stands to reason they'd be mostly silly and trashy.

Reminder: the sun is NOT cooler during the evening 105 5

>>34553229
This post from one of the last threads would work if you make them a bit more proactive in their Spacer-Saving:

>Many old spacers who'd been involved in wrecks resulting in great losses of life have alleged that their ships had passed by an old Soviet orbiter capsule from the early days of space exploration in the days preceding the accident. Sometimes, it is claimed that the capsule was inexplicably passed several times, despite the differences in course and velocity.

>In a few cases where disaster was narrowly averted, spacers have reported seeing one to three figures dressed in ancient cosmonaut suits, looking in through the windows from the outside, tapping on the glass and motioning with their hands as if trying to get the attention of the crew inside.

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So glad to see these threads around. Have a ghost story to go along with one of my all-time favorite pieces of drawfriendry:

>The Staring Woman, as she is called, is a rather macabre specter that numerous Spacers have reportedly seen while flying through the so-called "Sargasso" clouds of debris left orbiting the Earth after the Kessler Event of the mid-23rd century. Wearing naught but an expectant stare and a vague smile, entirely nude but for the long black hair wrapped and tangled around her body, this space ghost is said to rap and tap on external windows and portholes, as if she were some neighbor next door wanting to borrow a cup of sugar or to step in from the cold. On very rare occasions, she has even been sighted floating inside the airlock, rapping and tapping on the internal door with an encouraging look on her face. No one knows or cares to find out what happens if you let her inside.

>>34552052
They're not as far as I know. Everybody was psyked whenever special forces dudes came onboard, snipers or not. It means we're about to be involved in some cool shit

>>34554219
As the person who originally thought that up (haha, making unprovable claims on the internet!) it is super weird to see this idea still being posted.

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>Never open the airlocks during FTL travel, Something might find the idea of a place out of the Warp-Wind attractive

>Never leave a radio on the empty stations for too long, old lost radio signals can sometimes bounce around and mix together for years before they are picked back up, sometimes the messages are undecipherable gibberish But other times they sound like cries for help made from thousands of voices

>Never pickup pre-FTL human ships, Humans did some stupid and cruel things to make sure there colonists made it to there destination, Even if they arrived as something else.

>Legend has it that if a spacefarer dies in the warp, the realization of their demise never reaches their brain, since they're going so fast. Some captains have claimed they have sent a hailing call to nearby ships, only to be answered by a decaying corpse in tattered captain's regalia. The most famous case is George "Rattleme" Bones, who was completely skeletonized by an acid leak during a warp jump.

>anything you shouldn't do in the warp, a warp born may do, so long as it won't harm the ship
>stopping a warp born while in the warp from going to the exterior is taboo
>you don't stop a man visiting his parents, after all

>>34551868

Hey at least they didn't end up like Wu-Peterson Enterprises; They say that even a hundred years after they declared bankruptcy and all the shareholders committed suicide some of their cursed shares still end up in the Company employee pension schemes of any company who try to pass freight through the deneb gap.

>Always carry an extra bottle of Vodka on board, Every time the ship has a close call or a string of good luck, pour a shot glass and leave it in the airlock. its best to thank 'The Comrades'

You know, a thought just occurred to me. We've had threads in the last where Humanity has been the Universe's "crazy species," and its "adaptive species," and even its "strong species" on occasion, but I don't think we've had a thread like this where it could be construed that Humanity is the Universe's "superstitious species" or even, if those superstitions ended up being true, the "lucky species."

>Human ships and colonies tend to fare better than what other species consider to be the average, and even thrive when no scientific advantage can be discerned.

>On numerous occasions, Humanity has made amazing discoveries on sheer blind luck alone, astonishing their neighbors.

>More than once, a Human vessel, station or population center in dire straits has somehow survived due to extremely improbably happenstance and what can only be described as supernatural intervention.

>Alien species traveling and living with Humans observe and note the number of strange and ideosyncratic rituals, rites and invocations they perform as a matter of course, and posit that maybe, just maybe, they might be having some sort of positive effect.

>Alien races begin including Humans amongst their crews and colonists, and begin, awkwardly, to copy and adapt some of Humanity's superstitions for their own use.

>>34554523
>if you encounter a warp ghost, it's said you must tell them they'r dead until after they get to port, because once they're told they're dead they finally truly die
>and nobody should die far from the lights of life

Of course, there are no confirmed accounts of a warp zombie.

>More advanced ships will sometimes carry out their mission long after their crew has passed. Freighter crews have told tales of being boarded by pirates, only to be greeted by charred flesh and piles of ash in the docking bay.

>>34554545
Would whisky be a good substitute? Its a good sailor's drink after all.

>>34554545

I thought that was only if a fire arm is discharged on a ship? For general close calls you need to space one of the chef's best meals before anyone else sits down to eat in the mess

>>34554551
>Human ships and colonies tend to fare better than what other species consider to be the average, and even thrive when no scientific advantage can be discerned
"If it moves, and it shouldn't: Duct Tape. If it doesn't move, and it should: WD-40."

>>34554567
Bad luck to give them anything but Vodka, its best not to Question superstition.

>>34554551
>aliens following the rituals nearly always stop soon after
>the stories they tell about why change dramatically
>but there are a few common threads to the tales
>them seeing the spirits, ghosts or even animated corpses of the human long dead doing as their legends foretell
>warp whispers becoming clear, or a sudden short belief/knowledge/experience of the ship as alive

Essentially, it's 2spooky4xenos. Mostly, some individuals and two species can handle the skeletons. Indeed, there have been a couple rumours of Avnari ghost ships and sailors helping sailors in distress alongside human ones.

>>34554592
if a fire arm is discharged then you need to space the idiot who discharged it.

>>34554567
Given that they're cosmonaut ghosts, it would be best to give them vodka. It was their favorite, after all.

>>34554449
A lot of people in those long-ago threads found it pretty evocative, and if seems folk still do now. You started something great.

>Some say that your ship will be granted a boon for showing the Staring Woman a bit of kindness and cycling your airlock after spotting her to "let her inside."

>Others say that sighting the Staring Woman is a grim omen, and that acknowledging her in any way will only beget disaster for both ship and crew.

>>34554598
If you run out of vodka, you can use whisky or rum. But you should also talk to the void and apologise.
And ask the black sea sailors to share it with those if the blue sea.

>>34554627
If you run out of Ceremonial Vodka then you've ether had to ask the Comrade for a favor one to many times, or some wankers been stealing shots

You mustn't jetisson sewage while warp travelling. Leave nothing biological, nothing that was once alive. And nothing with a living thing's name on it. Only the ship's name.
With a drop of blood, a true name or piece of you, something may be able to follow you backs or watch you, or...something.

Look. Don't shit in the Warp, alright?

>Tuning your comms array to an unused station can have very different results. Communications officers have reported hearing music that nobody in the known universe that heard before, whalesong, though whales, exclusive to earth, had been driven to extinction 10,000 cycles ago. Some comms officers have reported a voice, sobbing and pleading for them to help. The officers in question elaborated on the subject - each time, it was a loved one of theirs who had died recently.

>>34554641
That or the bottle was damaged, or you couldn't get any at your last port of call.
Drinking the vodka reserved for the comrades is pretty much a resignation from ever leaving orbit as anything other than a passenger.

There is one tale even the most grizzled sailors won't tell....

Once, a ship with an experimental warp drive, called the "Indestructible" went into deep space, activated their drive and arrived at the destination without a hitch. The sailors then had a little party and everyone was happy. They then went home, and got a hefty bonus from their pleased employers. Nobody saw a single ghost, and the ship at the time was a stark grey cuboid. Nothing supernatural in the slightest happened. The ship went on to serve for many years until it was obsolete and was broken up, with the AI being upgraded and installed in a new ship of the line, which it still operates on today. Spooky or what?

>>34554703
This is honestly a great addition and a stark counterpoint to the other stories in the thread.

If she knocks. you answer. if she knocks. you answer. if she knocks. you answer. if she knocks. you answer.

If she knocks. you hide. If she knocks. you hide. If she knocks. you hide. If she knocks. you hide.

>>34554737
If he knocks, and asks for ten credits for washing your ship despite the fact you didn't ask and he did a shitty job, swear at him.
Seriously, those fuckers are everywhere.

>>34554728
>>34554737
Don't listen to these two. Don't acknowledge her existence, Don't even allow your brain to process the knocks.

>>34554772
if he knocks. and asks for about tree fiddy. then you are dealing with the loc ness monster, do not give him anything, else he follows you forever, demanding his tree fiddy.

>>34554795
Goddamnit, now I want chef's chocolate salty balls.

>In addition to whatever other beverages a ship's galley might have in stock, synthetic nutrient rich, government approved liquid sustenance included, each Spacer must be allotted a ration of "pure," unflavored water each day, preferably drawn from the vessel's home planet, if it has one.

>Seeing a star die and wink out while looking out into the void is considered one of the very worst omens, presaging disaster on a planetary scale, at least.

>playing Traveller while in the warp is a bad idea

>>34554816
Well they are packed full of vitamins and good for you

Blowout soon, spacestalker.

>Carrying a fallen Shooting star on a ship is bad luck, as the ship will follow the stars fall.

>being struck by a falling star is good luck, and if the star remains with the one it struck then they will never come to harm.

>Leaving a shooting star on a corpse will ensure it reaches it destination on the other side.

>Removing a Shooting star from a corpse ensures the corpse and Bad luck will follow you, your family, your ship and your crew until it is returned to them or their resting place.

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>>34553229

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>>34555181

Open containers on a ship are bad luck. Always use sippy cups
> My players found this out when someone's cup of Space Coke spilled all over the navigation computer

It is unknown what jumpspace truly looks like, but the first thing new recruits are told is to keep the windows covered during a jump.

A little powdered iron from an asteroid is thought to help with Jump-Sickness.

In some spacer cultures, the ground is regarded with a mixture of fear, reverence, and awe. They know it is a very powerful thing, but it is completely foreign to them. Spacers who dare venture out of their metal homes often cower from the sun, and walk as lightly as they can on the ground, scared of the way dirt shifts under their feet ("it feels like it's going to collapse" is a commonly expressed fear). Open spaces other than the Black are distrusted.

Girls from Luna are the best lovers.

Bugs in general are bad omens, if not downright terrifying to spacers. Take the fear most people have of spiders and multiply it by 10. Not only are they creepy, in the sterile environments of a ship they mean contamination. House flies in particular are thought to be associated with disease and ruin.
Might also have something to do with old prejudices against humanity's former foes, the Insectoids

>>34555370
But girls from mars have bigger boost modules!

>>34555370
>>34555741
But Jupiter girls have the biggest moons! At both poles!

>>34555782
On their feet and heads?! that's nasty.

>>34555741
> Dem Olympus Mons

Girls from Uranus...never mind.

Space threads are the cream of /tg/'s crop I swear


Anyways, do you know why pirates, marauders and freelancers always go for the comms or the captain first, unless they wanna extort you or make a 'deal'?
They're afraid. Afraid of a Captain's curse.
Y'see, on pretty much any ship under fire, the bridge and the captain are the last to go. And if ya let the captain spit his last, dying curses through the comms at you and your ship and all your brothers in arms, they /will/ stick. The darkness between the stars won't forget such words.
You gotta do all you can to stop those words being heard by the void. Either silence those comms, or silence the captain or both.


Y'see, it could be years, perhaps decades; but one day your comms will open on their own, and no matter how far you went and how long it's been, you'll hear again those last, defiant words, as if spoken by the very depths of space; and after that, boy...

After that, they come true.

>>34555941
>>34555782
>>34555370

Women (and men) from each major planet and colony are attributed different characteristics by Spacers as to their worth as lovers:

[Lunarians] are reportedly the most romantic and dreamy.

[Martians] are supposed to be the most outgoing and adventurous.

[Jovians] are said to be the most beautiful and have the supergiant tits.

[Saturnians] are said to be the most intelligent and creative.

It was thirty years ago, before we’d really nailed down warp bubbles and occasionally a ship in warp would shudder and groan, exiting with strange dents and scratches on the outer surface. The techs said something about regions of dense space causing oscillations in the bubble and exerting pressure on the hull. Now, protocol dictates that nonessential systems be shut down during warp, exterior cameras among them, but I was in my quarters and heard the ship beginning to moan and I decide to have the cameras turned back on. Thought it might be interesting to see these ‘oscillations’. Well, the cameras get turned back on and a feed of the side of the ship is piped to my personal computer. What I saw out there were no ‘oscillations’. When I looked out I saw things striking at the hull, looked like monsters with claws and pincers and other things I don’t have names for. But then, after a moment I see other things arrive, different from the first ones. They had EVA suits on and they were herding the monsters away, by the end of it there was just a single line of men, astronauts they looked like, standing between those things and the ship. The shuddering stopped, and we dropped back into realspace right after, but I still wonder if I just had a dream, or if there really is something out there, protecting us from the void.

>>34556192
So what are Terrans.. /d/eviant?

>>34556253
not>>34556192 but:

Terrans have the best stamina, they actually live under the strongest gravitational force of all of them on account of Jovians and Saturnians living on orbital space stations (because gas giant means no ground)

>>34556253
Old fashioned, steadfast and loyal.

>>34556474
>>34556490
Either-Or.

It's bad that I want to puzzle all this out now.

Martian Ghosts

>The Red Planet used to naturally possess an atmosphere and liquid water, but it was slightly too small and slightly too mineral-sparse to maintain a safe magnetic field and so lost them to cosmic winds and radiation millions of years ago.
>Archaeological sites dug decades after colonisation revealed that Mars did indeed also used to have a living ecosystem... including a tribal race of tripod-legged crustacean-like creatures. They made cave paintings; basic pottery, tools and idols; primitive boats; and had discovered fire.
>Some claim that on lonely nights you can still see the ghosts of this long dead people, their forms barely reflected by the light of Phobos and Deimos, fishing and foraging along rivers that dried up long before the time of the dinosaurs.

Good? Yes, no?

>>34557752

I like it.

>>34557504
I think it's pretty easy, assuming that
>>34556192, >>34556474, and >>34556490 are all correct:
Mars is still being charted and explored, causing it to attract people with an outdoors/adventurous bent.

Saturn attracts people who are looking for inspiration such as designers, artists, and scientists.

Jupiter is the resort planet, the rich and powerful build their homes and cities there(think of that cloud city from Star Wars). Body modification and genetic therapy/selection are common among this upper class resulting in a reputation for extreme beauty and sometimes ridiculous proportions. (due to the variable gravity of such stations, proportions which would be impractical under earth gravity are less restricting.)

Earth is...Earth. It's the birthplace not only of our race but our culture and many inhabitants pay homage to that in their art and lifestyles. Older music endures on the radio stations most of the time, occasionally the latest hit is given some attention but people always return to the classics.

>>34557752
>Some say that a tribe or tribes of Native Martians still exist, hidden in secret caves and valleys near the poles.
>Opinion between believers is split on their state. Some say they must be an extremely wise, peaceful people and that humanity can learn a lot from them. Others muse that they must have regressed into troglodyte monsters following the death of their biosphere.
>In either case, most people consider living examples an urban legend similar to Bigfoot. That hasn't stopped a tourism industry around it from cropping up, however. Dozens of tourists turn up every month hoping to hike into the wilderness and find a real Martian.
>Most of them return empty handed. Some disappear and are never heard from again.

>>34557799
I'd like to think that when colonization starts up the only people to remain on Earth will be those too old-fashioned to go off-planet.

So, Earth girls would only want Earth boys.

>>34556253
Terrans, in response to the deviancy rampant in Jovian and Saturnian cultures, reflexively cleave to their conservative roots. They are the most religious, according to self-reported surveys. Spacers do not generally consider themselves overly religious despite the rituals and prayers they offer to the various gods of the void and the stars.

Spacers who find love on Earth find a lover who is loyal and steady, even if they tend to favor missionary sex in 1G for the purposes of procreation within their quota.

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>>34557752
>>34557900
>Adding yet another twist to the tale, Native Martian sightings (of both ghosts and living examples) have been steadily increasing for decades, with hundreds now reported each year.
>Some say this is just due to the growing popularity of the myth, but others wonder if it's no coincidence that the increase in sightings correlates with the terraforming of Mars beginning to show noticeable, tangible results.
>Perhaps the true sons and daughters of Mars are not dead after all.
>Only time will tell, as the greens and blues of life spread across the red planet once again.

Also, I hope someone got the reference

>>34557977
But are Earth girls easy?

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There was a small platform from the beginning of the settlement era, they say, that somehow ended up on an extremely eccentric orbit decades after its service time. During the lunar occupation people lost track of it and some speculate it could have been knocked into an unpredictable spiral by an asteroid or a stray warhead. It was coated in absorber and with the systems long gone cold it would be impossible to detect without a known vector. It probably ended up as micro debris in the Oort Cloud.

Except there are countless unverifiable reports of the old hull drifting by somewhere at the strangest times. Almost all the sightings happened on isolated ships in some kind of distress. Some happened to incapacitated crews of larger vessels. A few old captains swear they saw the thing in their day. But an active service spacer would never admit to seeing it even if he was sure he did simply because it would cost him his commission and probably involve some kind of anti psychotic treatment. Few of the reports actually line up on an even remotely possible orbital trajectory. It is generally considered an old wives tale and dismissed outright.

But when you're stuck on a rotting hulk without propulsion and drifting across the dark side of some minor Iovian moon then you won't ignore a pressurized hull with a docking clamp that looks to be working. But be warned. It is also said that whoever steps on board will never return the same.

>>34558104
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=F7YzqUa_EVI

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>>34558635
I was going more in reference to the anime Cowboy Bebop, but sure, 80s Jeff Goldblum works too.

Small animals are good luck on board a ship. They're even better luck when they're in a cage and not in the ventilation.
Ceterum censeo Quatuoralveonem esse delendam

>>34554551
>the "lucky species."
read some nivian

>>34559890
Did you mean Larry Niven?
Where Nessus bred humans for luck?

>Being a scifi fan
>Not worshiping the might of the cowardly Pierson's Puppeteers

>>34559971
>Did you mean Larry Niven?
yes, I love his stuff

>>34559890
I don't understand. And my google-fu can't get a grip on what you're saying. There's a sci fi book out there called The Nivian King?

>>34559999
Oh.
>>34559971
>>34559991
Both rather answered that for me. Should have refreshed once again after typing that up.

I'll add him to my "must read some day" list then.

>>34559999
no, larry nivian is a sci-fi author, read the book ringworld, in his books humans are the lucky species.

>>34555370
What other silly spacer superstitions besides fearing the dirt and hating bugs do som have ?

>>34560023
It's Niven. Not correcting you to be a dick, but so others know the proper name of the author. Larry Niven.

>>34560015
>>34560023
Alongside Ringworld check out:
-Gil "The ARM" Sullivan
-the Integral Trees and its sequel The Smoke Ring
-World of Ptaavs (or is it Ptavvs?)
-A Gift from Earth
-Neutron Star

..just read any of his friggin' books, they're all amazing. I grew up on his stuff. It's awesome. Literally, it inspires awe.

>>34560122
>Due to having no rotational day/night cycle, spacers aboard ships and even in most stations adopt a six hour on-off routine like most military ships. Sleeping in late is seen as avoiding work and inviting disaster, because somebody isn't doing their necessary duties. It's known as "flirting the death bed" because you risk death by staying in bed.

>As a rite of passage, spacers go for their first unaided spacewalk at the age of thirteen. This itself isn't so bad, except that because their suit is an extension of their life itself, their elders sabotage three things in their suits they must discover and fix before their space walk. They're warned there is sabotage, but that is the extent of the help they receive. Those that do not succeed are... shunned, until they get it right. Assuming the lived.

>>34560231
>It's Niven.
oops, I'm dumb. thank you for getting the right spelling out there.

>>34551708
Dawson's Christian is also pretty good.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=w34fSnJNP-4

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>>34560023

>>34560285
Uh huh.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Larry_Niven

http://www.larryniven.net/

http://www.isfdb.org/cgi-bin/ea.cgi?42

>>34560231
Just finished his/some other guy's Juggler/Betrayer/Destroyer/Fate of Worlds series. I thought it was pretty sweet, even for a post-written prequel series.

>>34560457
>even
Did you mean to say 'especially'?

Spacer survivors rescued from crippled craft will often recall in their delirium being visited by men and women. While they will not help the survivor they urge and encourage them to struggle and live for rescue. Many attribute it to delirium, low-oxygen, or some other malady related to their predicament but those who listen to their tales notice the names they call them are those that appear in the ancient Terran histories.

Some superstitious spacers will say a small prayer to these Guardians before their flight begins.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UqU7W8LdRd4

Because so much of the expansion into space was prompted by the Ancient Russians of Earth, an odd tradition begun by Yuri Gagarin has evolved into the current form: before a new ship leaves dock, every person on board must piss on the vessel. Using the latrine before takeoff is considered a valid interpretation of this superstition.

John Aaron is considered the patron saint of flight engineers. Any time a critical failure on board a ship is narrowly averted by quick thinking by the flight engineer, the engineer calls "All Clear" by declaring "SCE to AUX."

It's considered bad luck for spacers to sleep lying down in gravity, as it evokes the feeling of laying in your grave.

No spacecraft since the 20th Century has ever been named "Challenger."

The first time a new spacehand makes a jump, they must spend their first night sleeping in a spacesuit strapped to the exterior of the ship, with nothing between them and hyperspace but the ship's own warp bubble. On larger vessels, this leads to the image of literally hundreds of greenhorns trying to sleep while strapped to the hull of a Branson-class Superdreadnaught.

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>>34560485
Normally, if you write something awesome, and then a decade or three later go back and decide to write a second series that takes place before, during, and after the first series, rotates the plot of the first by 90*, and rewrites continuity (while trying to make it so that it isn't actually a retcon, just a revelation of what was actually going on,)...
I would not have very high hopes for your success. Or this second series.

The X-of-Worlds series I found to be absolutely excellent, and everything I loved about Niven. Good Stuff.

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>>34560582
Oh, okay.

>>34554703
I call bullshit. You just made that up.

>>34555177
>>being struck by a falling star is good luck, and if the star remains with the one it struck then they will never come to harm.
Major Tom?

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>>34560582
What is that nonsense? Where's it's small nubbish finger-like "hands" at its mouth? That has razor spikes.
Where's it's fluffy coiffed mane? That has a sleek retro-80's spaceman uniform... thing.
That is not a Pierson's Puppeteer in the slightest! As if such huge cowards would trust a LEATHER STRAP to be attached to their neck! That's a choking hazard if ever there was one!

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>>34560954
Look, I work with what I got, okay?

>>34561048
YOU'VE READ A MOTE IN GOD'S EYE?

As far as I could tell, I'm the only person who's ever picked the book up.

...That artist forgot to make the Brownie... brown. And with red eyes. Meh.

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>>34561107
They're artists. You can't expect them to actually have to read the book too!

I did read Mote, but I don't really like it when Niven and Pournelle collaborate. It just gets too dry or something. Doesn't work for me.

More semi-obscure aliens.

This thread and the last ad on Sup/tg/, somfeelmfree to vote them up and bookmark them for future reference:

http://suptg.thisisnotatrueending.com/archive.html?searchall=Space+superstition

>>34561155
Damned iPhone keyboard. Anyway, lets continue making this thread a good one people.

Giant alien spiders are no joke. Never go near them.

Have at least 2 toughs on your crew. Even with secure hatches you want a team that can go in and remove intruders by force.

Just because you accepted payment for a mission does not mean you have to complete it. Recalculate your fuel requirements. Getting marooned in some backwater won't do.

Don't attack the boarding drone, attack the drone control system.

If you hit your enemy again in the same system you will probably catch a few of the crew busy with repairs.

Actually read the messages on the coms before you attack. Not everyone wants to kill you.

>>34560954

It's not a puppeteer, it's just a two-head variant of an alien species a guy on deviantart made. That mutation is *inspired* by the puppeteers, though. Reverse Google Image search it, you'll find the guy's deviantart page, it's pretty neat.

>>34561404
>not everyone wants to kill you
But how amibsupposed to get scrap if there's no other option that gives me scrap?

>>34561146
>crab people flee social upheaval because blue crabs don't want to give red crabs rights
>in exile find themselves forced to embrace even more equality than the rest of their race that they fled

>furries flee life of being adequate but unremarkable mid level bureaucrats because they want to be sailors

>ringstacks are too slow and idle
>patrons contact another race that specializes in genetic engineering to fix it
>other race invents upgrade that makes them sociopathic megalomaniacs
>kill off patron race
>small sect of non-upgraded rings flee because fuck that

>wheeled dudes accidentally bet their race into extinction; flee in hopes of escaping the debt

>centaurs
>???

>humans
>wanted a backup

>>34557752
Mars was habitable until it was smacked in the northern hemisphere. Its mantle stopped circulation, the core lost its magnetism, and martian volatiles were lost to the void during the impact and after without a magnetic field to protect 'em.

There is a hidden panel or plaque on every starship where every captain of the ship has signed or engraved their name, often with a message for the next ship's captain. Often, this panel is located directly under the captain's chair, or in the captain's quarters. It's considered incredibly bad luck for any person other than the captain to read the messages or names on this panel, as it's considered usurping the captain's privileges.

Even though most modern commerce is done by electronic credit transfer, it's considered traditional for a new ship's captain to purchase a number of coins or bills, which should be included as part of the first paycheck or share for their crew. These coins or bills should never be spent unless they receive word that the captain has died, in which case it should be used to buy booze, half of which should be drunk and the other half tossed into space. Spending the "Captain's Shilling" for any other reason is considered a deadly insult, the equivalent of saying, "You're so worthless I hope you die unmourned."

It is not uncommon for Christian spacers to take communion as their first meal upon setting foot on another world. The important thing, however, is that eucharist must be taken alone and in secret, with a maximum of one other person allowed to be present. This is meant as an homage to the first man to take Communion in space, Edwin "Buzz" Aldrin.

>>34561672
I wish upon you a system failure that will reset you achievements. May you enjoy the reacquisition of each wonderful vessel.

>>34554627
>>34554641
>you will never pour one out for the space homies
Why even exist

>>34560736
Yeah, I mean a ship with a name as pompous as "Indestructible" not getting rekt first thing out of port? Yeah, sure. And those green-skinned Jiks aren't sexy.
Don't look at me like that, Johnson, I caught you checking out the Quartermaster on the way in

>>34554885
Just put it in your mouth and suck 'em

>>34562007
Until the cream comes out

>>34561745
Is that actually true? I can't find anything about that

>>34562070
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Martian_dichotomy#Multiple_Impact_Hypothesis

http://news.nationalgeographic.com/news/2009/05/090511-mars-asteroid.html

>>34562070
also earth's year once had 400 days, now it has fewer

http://books.google.com/books?id=R6b3skeNXrgC&pg=PA13&lpg=PA13&dq=earth%27s+year+once+had+400+days+clams&source=bl&ots=PxC-TY3NiJ&sig=V1Ac7_N7uBaZBLi0hzjhlfhZ-lA&hl=en&sa=X&ei=2e0EVM_3FMzHgwTF0YHgAw&ved=0CCAQ6AEwAA#v=onepage&q=earth%27s%20year%20once%20had%20400%20days%20clams&f=false

>>34561404
This doesn't seem like superstition, just grounded advice.

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>It's not known why, but the old Martian rovers continue to rove across Mars to this day without any input from anyone
>Best to leave them alone
>They've seen some shit

> Among the various saints and revered figures from space travel, from Neil the Giant to Lovell the Leader, there is one whom no one speaks of, except in hushed tones: Vladimir the Wrathful. It is said that the spirit of Vladimir Komarov haunts ship designers, engineers, and construction workers who, through avarice, incompetence, or carelessness, get others killed, haunting their dreams with his angry screaming.

>>34562803
Chefs happen to have a nearly identical belief about Gordon Ramsay shouting at them.
Spacer chefs have to deal with two perfectionist angry shouting spirits.

>>34562597
Wait, if you end up settling the areas where the rovers are, are they like stray dogs? Or are they more like a Black Dog?

>>34552159

Given the integrity of hulls, it's unlikely even an armor-piercing round could do much more than open a small hole. The idea of explosive decompression tends to be propagated by Hollywood more than reality. The idea that a stray round through a window could cause a lot of damage is fiction enough, as those are some of the strongest points in the hull.

Consider that there is also probably some form of defense against such small penetrations in a ship's hull. Perhaps a liquid/semi-liquid gel layer that is forced into the low pressure by the breach, sealing it until it can be repaired or even hardening on contact with vacuum to patch the hull, or a force-field to keep the atmosphere in place while repair crews or robots are dispatched. Some materials may even have bio-technological agency to repair themselves, like a nano/memory material or semi-organic hull layer.

What is the worst song/movie that could possibly be played at the voyage journey?

Hard mode: No Titanic.

>>34563592
Any songs made during a year major space disasters happened.

Anything from 1986 is right out, for example.

>>34554551

Could be human "intuition". Niven's "Bowl of Heaven" describes humans and other aliens as having an "undermind" or subconscious which gives them an edge. The aliens use them consciously, switching on and off as necessary when they need inspiration, but they're more vulnerable during this state. Humans are blind to it, and it only comes to them in short spats of inspiration when it's needed. The aliens are pretty amused by the fact that "I just though of something!" is a common human phrase, but don't realize that it's this trick which gives humans an edge against them.

Anyway, it could be that humans simply have a knack for listening to this undermind, extrapolating from unprocessed data faster than their consciousness and working on "feelings" when time is short. Humans might get lucky on a colony because it just "feels like the right place/world". Lucky discoveries are made on a hunch, because it just looks right. A split-second decision or choice can be made in dire situations and turn out better than anticipated because the subconscious has comprehended the nature of the phenomenon and guided the conscious in their actions. It may work with aliens because small rituals might be a way to tap into inspiration, superstition is necessary for the mind to work in this manner (and humans are just good at it), or simply an imitation of what they glean might somehow give them an edge.

>>34554850

Well, yeah. A star dying tends to be pretty bad for all its planets, and any such planets around for quite some distance.

>>34559086

> And the oral of the story?
Don't leave food in the fridge.

That episode made me physically upset.

>>34563592
Movie: 2001: A Space Odyssey or Event Horizon.
Song: Europe "The Final Countdown" or Billy Thorpe "Children of the Sun"

>>34561155
And all of them are right in the OP, too.

>>34561107
Not necessarily a Brownie- probably one of the near-extinct Motie subraces.

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>>34562916

we have literally left something called "Spirit Rover" on the surface of mars, so it was only a few generations into martian colonisation before tales of the "ghost dog" started to spread:

They say it was sent to mars before colonisation started for a limited one year mission that they famously outlasted by years, until one winter their leg got trapped on the martian surface while trying to outrun a dust storm and while they gnawed their leg off the dust finally caused their little doggy-habitation suits to run out of power and so they eventually died alone on mars.

People who get caught outside the domes during a sand storm tell stories about how they thought they were lost and sure to run out of oxygen until they heard an eery howl or found a trail of paw prints in the sands that led them to safety.

>>34564857
I like the idea that maybe the belief in 'the spirit rover' has let such a thing become real, its that or the actual rover learned how to modify itself thanks to space magic.

>>34564857
That comic is so fucking sad

>>34565716
>>34564857
>one day, we will colonize Mars
>We will find the Rovers we left there
>We will immortalize them in museums
>Your children will visit them every day and ask you to tell them the story again of what it was like on Earth when the Rovers first went to Mars
>The Rovers will never be taken back to earth
>But they will be happy
>They realize they never left home
>They're just finally there

>>34565971
Who knew I could have feels about Rovers

>>34565971

That's wonderful.

>>34565971
You made me feel better about that depressing comic, thank you

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>>34560766
i wish

>When someone dies in space, it is the duty of the crew to do everything they can to return the body to its home world.

>If they don't they should never return to that world as she will hate them for abandoning her child

>>34560547
>Because so much of the expansion into space was prompted by the Ancient Russians of Earth, an odd tradition begun by Yuri Gagarin has evolved into the current form: before a new ship leaves dock, every person on board must piss on the vessel.

Even the women? And if so... how?

>>34569546
Even the ladies can cop a squat.

>>34563848
It's livin in the fridge
You can't stop the mold from growwwin
Don't know what it is at alllll

>>34569605
Yeah, but dudes have it easier... they can nail any vertical surface. Girls gotta find something roughly-horizontal and reasonably-flat, and there's not very many parts of a ship like that...

...and now I'm picturing a ship's crew, the men having finished their "ceremonial duty", lined up and laughing as the crew's female populus all climb out on the wings, pants off, to squat, spread, and let fly...

>>34569546
Crew live on the ship a week before launch to do a bit of debugging, EVERYONE will pee at some point.

>>34569800
Aww, that's not as amusing as >>34569760 was.

>>34569760
>laughing
Seems like it must not be that important then

>>34569947
Some of the newbies point and laugh and snicker. The old hands smack them upside the head. . . then they tell the ladies.

Those newbies will find themselves, at some point during the voyage, tied to a console chair while a select group of ladies take embarassing photographs of their genitalia and post them up all over the ship.

>>34570045

Hell, remember Rico, that wrench-jockey with the stutter? He met his wife that way - turns out he was packing, and she liked what she saw.

Still painted a face on it and sent out pictures with advice from Ensign Glans for months, though.

>>34562916
Jesus. The Cŵn Annwn of the Red Planet. That's golden.

I'd like to hear a bit more about these crazy Jovian Girls myself.

>>34571852
Why? Alien girls are better.

>>34571852
everything you've ever heard about crazy redheads, apply to Jovians

>>34570045
>Those newbies will find themselves, at some point during the voyage, tied to a console chair while a select group of ladies take embarassing photographs of their genitalia and post them up all over the ship.
I find that very hard to believe happening, unless the captain was a woman.

Better yet, a whole fleet of Amazonian-class starships.

>>34554545
http://m.youtube.com/?#/watch?v=UqU7W8LdRd4

>>34569546
>>34569605

Actually the tradition is to piss on the rear-most tire of the bus to the launch site.

Female cosmonauts just piss in a cup and pour it on the tire.

>>34573770
atleast one managed to piss on it like the guys, so.

Mocking someone's religion is, on some ships, cause for dismissal next time they make port.

Given the vast number of religions out in the black the most common blessing from on captain or care to another is "May God/Gods stand between you and harm in all the empty places you will walk".

Cyber-prosthetics are most common amongst those who tend to the hull. A very close second is amongst the engineers. A common tradition amongst new engineers is stripping naked and staring into the naked reactor. Pie especially of flesh ruined by radiation and cancer are replaced with metal to bring them closer to the ship.

On many ships it is not done to replace more than 5% of the ships mass in the same 6 months when doing repairs or upgrades.

>>34574004
*pieces of flesh.

>>34572515
>implying the older crew don't invite the newbie drinking, get him blind drunk and then hand him over to the ladies

The captain knows its going on, and understands that its all about team building and teaching proper respect to the newbies.

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>>34571852
>>34572179
>>34572289

Chief Techie Danni Paramis aboard the I.S.C. Halcyon, y'heard a her, what some're already callin' a modern-day saint was built n'bottled on one of Ol' Jove's terraformed moons, they say, before learnin' her some engineering and runnin' off to join us Spacers out here in the black.

Left behind a trio of dotin' parentals and more wealth than Midas t'do it too, or so's the claims.

Anyways, iffin' you've seen them new little devotional icons the other engies have been makin', you'd know she was s'posed to be a real looker, as only a girl from Ol' Jove can afford t'be. Me, havin' seen some choice 3-D, full-color medscans that was taken when she joined up with the I.S.C., can tell you that them little pictures ain't doin' "Saint Danni" no justice by a third.

Yahuh.

Fair skin the cream-shade of engine coolant, hair all the colors of Jupe's swirling storms, and a petite frame supportin' tits bigger than'er head with the hips and ass t'match. Yeah, that's right I seen 'em, and no I ain't sharin' the data file. They say she use'ta keep tools in 'er cleavage while she was workin' and looked like an angel come down from heaven wearin' them grease-stained coveralls and that perfect smile a hers.

And shit, here I am gushing and I ain't even talked about them huge, sexy brains of hers or how many patents she filed, or even how she done saved her ship an crew thrice-over at the cost of her own sweet life. But, then again, you was admin' after Jovian girls, not saints an heroes.

>>34575534
What the fuck language is that?

>>34575669
Sounds like the Luna dialect of English

>>34575669
Spacer pidgin accent.

>>34561865
What about a Muslim spacer? How do they find the way to Mecca?

>>34576390
Approximate galactic position of Sol, and by proxy, Earth.

On older ships and tramp freighters without artificial gravity systems, there are certain superstitions that are upheld that have been allowed to lapse on other, more modern or technologically advanced vessels:
>Even on ships that stay in space their entire operational lives and never make landfall on any planet, "up" must always be indicated through highly visible signage in all areas of the ship. If the design of the ship does not present a clear up/down orientation, one direction at random must be chosen as "up" and the signage positioned accordingly.
>Dates are considered a dangerous and unlucky food to consume aboard vessels without artificial gravity.
>While it was once considered important for a Spacer to know exactly how long it took them personally to travel from one end of a G-less ship to another in case of emergency, it became a point of pride to know how fast one could traverse the distance between any two points in the ship, and races became a common means of settling disputes.
>Coming down with a case of the hiccups on a ship without artificial gravity is considered a bad omen.

>>34576390
>>34576454
There is a lot of math and astronomy involved, leading to the stereotype that Muslim spacers naturally gravitate to careers in navigation or are predisposed to make friends with navigators. In reality, there are plentiful Sol/Earth/Mecca locating applications available for all commercially available personal data devices, making such extreme measures unnecessary.

>>34576390
>>34576454
>>34576720
Furthermore, predominately Muslim colonies that rely on the tourism industry have their cities arranged in such a way that, when seen from space, the lights form beautiful mathematical patterns.

Not a superstition, but meatheaded marines on military ships like to bump up the artificial gravity "For training".

This shit does not really work at all.

All it does it cause shittons of strain on equipment and personnel for pissing contests.

Tampering with the ship's gravity is considered a dischargable offense.

There are, however, special "Gym space stations" expressly designed with adjustable gravity chambers and specialized medical facilities for this.

>>34571413
the Red Hound of Mars…

Aye, lad.

>>34576767
I really like the idea of entire cities being made with the express intention of being pretty when viewed from space

>>34578950
France and Washington DC.

>>34578950
>>34579060
Maybe have Las Vegas style gambling cities be enticing from the air as well, like giant neon signs.

>>34554219
I don't know if I could resist the urge to open the airlock in that situation. I'm just too damn curious.

>>34552251
http://www.iflscience.com/space/space-sex-geckos-die-orbit

So are we going to add space sex geckos to the poem?

>>34561107

Have you read the sequel, "The Gripping Hand"? Also pretty good.

I highly recommend that, "Oath of Fealty" and "Inferno", "The Burning City" . . . .all of it, really.

>>34563592
"Fucking with the Altimeter" By Brainiac

>>34578950
It's just a natural conclusion when a species develops cheap and easy space travel

Of course, this means that more conspiracy-prone people have begun asking questions. What is up with the Naza Lines? Are all crop circles hoaxes?

The pyramids used to be white sandstone with gold tops - could those have been illuminated with fires?

Who were they signalling to - and what happens if they come back?

The answer is Morrigi. Obviously

>>34579787
Well, you will either be offering a restless spirit a little bit of warmth and comfort from her eternal drifting through the clouds of space junk encircling the Earth, for which she will thank you by granting your ship an aegis or boon. Or, you will be opening the way for a vengeful ghost to enter your home and sanctuary among the stars, haunting you and your vessel with a wrath only those abandoned to the void can manifest.

>>34580374
Either way, ready the stakes and salt shells.

Just in case.

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>>34578950
You cannot see buildings from space. A city is a grey blob by day and a pin of light at night from lower earth orbit. You cannot see the great wall of china. It's slim and the same color as the mountains it sits on. You can see streetlights, especially with a few streets close to each other like in any town.

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>>34580374
>>34579787
What if one just wanted to bone her?

>>34580448
Then he is a braver man than I.

>>34580448
Didn't one of us do something like that
and never return

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>>34578950
It's been used before.

>>34580585
You mean that dude who made a thread about being haunted by some pale naked chick, and then proceeded to try giving her the D?

>>34580976
And never posted again? Yeah, that one.

>>34581012
I wonder what happened to him.
A part of me wants to believe that he succeeded.

>>34581065
A part of me believes that he just made the story up and then got bored.

>>34579787
>>34580374
>>34580448
>>34580585
>You've long given up on trying to sleep, and have taken to walking the corridors and accessways during the wee hours of the ship's simulated night cycles.
>The hallway lighting flickers around you and blink out as you pass, just another symptom of the recent technical malfunctions seeming to plague your vessel.
>You shove your hands into the front pocket of your hooded sweatshirt, hunching your shoulders against that persistent chill issuing out from the ventilation system.
>Behind you comes a sound out of the darkness, a tinkling, rattling, whispering sound, like ice crystals and metallic debris lost in a solar wind, accompanied by the sharp scent of ozone and a precipitous drop in temperature.
>A pair of frigid arms wrap themselves around your shoulders and a slim, womanly shape, cold, colder than any cold you've ever known, presses itself against your back as the corridor's emergency lighting fails, plunging you into pitch blackness.
>The specter leans in closer, closer, and then whispers into your ear. You can feel her icy breath flowing down your neck, burning like a dry-ice fog, her voice more like the absence of sound in the shape of words. She says to you:
>"You really ought to see the medical officer about your insomnia... and speak with the chief engineer about all these femperature and electrical fluctuations... I've seen fine men and fine ships ruined by both..."

>>34576767
The US colony on Mudrathi's moon insists that it's lights being in shape of a giant dick is poor coincidence, right down to the "drips" of spunk

>>34581943

Please go to /nofun/ and stay there.
And take your edge with you.

>>34582700
I can picture all sorts of funny conversations when aliens are told that human colonies are in profane shapes, when all along they thought they were works of art.

>>34582642
I have no idea why but this is one of the coolest things I've seen yet in this thread.

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Military fleets that pass out of the heliopause of a given system have a peculiar tradition. Crew that have never been in proper interstellar space, known as 'umbilicals' (due to their previous failure to 'exit their star's womb'), 'smolt', or 'alevin', are subjected to the 'cord-cutting ceremony', marking the end of their cadethood. The member of the crew most senior in their intrastellar experience, usually the captain but occasionally another member of the crew, conducts the ceremony under the visage of the Manifest Vacuum.

The first shift of the ceremony is dedicated to the "Tribute to the Father Engineer" the to-be starwalkers gathered, and having been informed significantly beforehand of the incoming task, perform a demonstration of the skills they claim to have as befit their stations. For example, an engineer will fix a problematic backup system, a navigator will plot a course through transit-space to a distant star, and so on. Umbilicals whose tributes are not seen as being of sufficient merit by the Manifest Vacuum are subject to various kinds of awfulness, and errors are not only tolerated in these tributes, but expected; as such, the elements being interacted with by the umbilicals are disconnected from the ships.

The next day, the umbilicals are made to Kiss the Void, considered to be when the spacer is born from the umbilical they were before. They are crowded onto a secondary vessel attached to the main ship, ported out a short (less than a kilometer) distance from the command vessel, stripped starkers but for medical monitors, and spaced back towards the main ship. The ships' medical crew are nearby, and ready in case the Engineer-Saint(Blessed be his guidance, but averted be his gaze) makes his influence known. The trans-ship period for the umbilical is usually between twenty and thirty seconds; some unlucky people go for a minute, and usually have to be revived once they're back in the main ship.

>>34587592

Once back within the command vessel, the new spacer is promptly scrubbed down with decontamination soaps and hosed to cleanliness by the airlock; screaming is not uncommon here. However, the mentally hardest part of the task is now at hand; the spacer has to show that their training has taken full effect and show the Steely Eyes they will need. To do so, they must perform some complex task once back within the ship proper. Take note - the new spacer in question is doing this while their body is suffering heavy bruising from vacuum exposure, emotional turmoil from their current nakedness and recent trauma, and dermal, ocular and/or oral irritation from the cleaning in the airlock; also note that, while they have to perform the task on their own, no spacer is ever truly alone, and their to-be peers are allowed to offer advice, just so long as the testee is the one to realize the solution and accomplish the task. Failure at this stage results in the umbilical failing the test; success results in the testee being welcomed into the fleet as a proper member of the crew, fully acknowledged as a member of the crew, and given their suit, followed by some form of celebration; alcohol is allowed, but not the Comrades' Vodka.

"Stillborn" are not considered bad luck, as some are just not meant to touch the void between the stars, but are a bad mark on the ship's crew, for not being able to handle this task well enough. Attacking a cord-cutting ceremony is the kind of offense that gets planets glassed. Leaving galactic space, or passing into unusually sparse space, is considered merited enough to wait until said space is reached before performing the cord-cutting ceremony. Formal bureaucratic files include references to having performed this ceremony, and to what degree.

Terms for those who have completed this trial:
>Space-touched
>Spacewalker
>Vac-blessed
>Starseer

>Spacers will go out in the warp and challenge each other to get closer and closer to the edge of the bubble.
>Closer to the bubble, the more respect
>Closer to the bubble, the more hallucinations spacers get
>They're always the same hallucinations

>>34575534
And if you think having a "patron saint of spacers with big breasts" is funny, you've never had a tit smack you in the face while trying to twist around in null-g.

The first Friday of every month is considered a bad luck day in the Terran Alliance. The Alliance Navy once got so fed up with this superstition, that they commissioned a ship specifically to debunk this superstition. Named the "TASS Friday," it began construction on the first Friday of the month, ended construction on the first Friday three months later, left drydock on the first Friday of the next month, and set out into the Warp on the first Friday of the month after that. For good measure, its captain was named Jonathan Friday, and yes, he was born on the first Friday of the month.

The ship was never heard from again.

>>34590426
It sounds as if they might need the extra help in that case.

>>34590588

Frelling Vorlons...

The Kowloon Nomads have a peculiar tradition regarding munitions. If they know who they're fighting, they will try to hang a severed limb of a member of that group, government, or species in their munition storage compartment. They claim this is so that 'they know the scent of their prey'; this limb is destroyed before the battle begins.

It should be noted that Kowloon Nomads have some of the highest kill-rates per ship lost when using tracking munitions.

>It is considered bad luck to wear red on-board, no one knows why, it is an Old Earth superstition

>Never board a ship with fewer engineers than Doctors

>>34562597
>Rover Mission Objectives:
>1 ) Establish data-link with command. ___ Completed
>2 ) Reposition to mission area 1. ___ Completed
>3 ) Conduct experiments 1 through 214. ___ Completed
>4 ) Reposition to mission area 2. ___ Completed
>5 ) Conduct experiments 215 through 333. ___ Completed
>6 ) Map designated area Q21 until data-link no longer tenable. ___ Completed
>7 ) Engage and eliminate any and all hostile exosolar threats to humanity. ___ ONGOING
>3 )

>>34591586
>All Emergency kits must contain a small towel printed with the motto 'Don't Panic'
All survivors who had access to such an item stated that it was 'the most useful thing in the kit'.

Terran Alliance engineers and science personnel traditionally bring a "full set" of die - 1d4, 3d6, 2d8, 2d10, 2d12, and 1d20 - on board any starfarer they board. They claim it's to help keep any AI on the ship from getting bored and 'experimenting'.

Except it's true; the TASS version of the Turing Test involves GMing for a session.

>Call it a ship, and it'll end up in a sea

The last meal that a ship's crew have together before setting off on a long-term mission is traditionally steak and scrambled eggs. One seat and portion should be put aside for The Shepard. Using soy substitute or powdered eggs is considered bad luck: this is one occasion where the captain should splurge a bit, lest they offend the spirit of The Shepard.

After the meal is over, The Shepard's portion may be eaten by the chef, or the chef may give it to a stranger. No other member of the crew should eat that portion: that is considered extremely bad luck.

-----

Anyone who is a virgin when they captain their first ship will never marry. This was probably started by the spacedock whores, but better safe than sorry. Some believe that this can be averted if the captain "divorces" his ship the night before his weddding.

You will abide by all ships traditions or I swear by my pretty little bonnet I will end you.

>>34591794
Even the aliens that don't speak English, it has an inexplicably universal effect

>>34591794
mah nigga right there

Requesting archival

>>34594168
https://archive.moe/tg/thread/34551627

All threads are automatically archived on archive.moe; if you can remember anything that was posted you can search for the thread. Doesn't save pictures, though, so that's a shame.

>>34594799
Thanks mate. Sucks about the pictures, but I just wanted to remember some of these ideas.

>>34594168
>>34594799
>>34594817
Just archive on sup/tg/ then.

>>34594835
Can't, on mobile at work.

The thread's already archived on suptg

Also, how about gremlins? Does the myth of them still exist in space?

I'd imagine it'd be an even bigger problem than before. The more paranoid ships have anti-gremlin charms hung over key doorways, and the A.I. cycling through cameras subconsciously to try and catch one in the act.

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>>34597385
Silly! Gremlins don't show up on vid feeds. They can feel the gaze of the eye, even if it is a camera, like hot needles and avoid it when looking for remote systems to mess with.

They are especially bothersome during extra vehicular activity.

>>34597385

Peh. The Engineer-Saint(Blessed be His guidance, but averted be His gaze) needs no 'gremlins' to exert his influence where those under his guidance have been remiss.

Particularly where objects can be attached to their ports incorrectly without issue.

>Becoming "unsynced", where ship time and date starts differing from the ship's home port, is considered an ill omen. Presumably because manually setting date and time leads to a drop in crew performance due to sleep issues, and unexplained causes of this phenomenon are... well, spooky.

>Every now and then someone reports seeing people in space through a ship's viewports. Suited, unsuited, alive, dead, dessicated, perfectly intact. Experiences differ. These instances are considered a perfectly natural minor halucination by most deep space mental health professionals, and are no cause to alarm. Though it's best to monitor sufferers for elevated stress levels. Of course, stories abound about this, ranging from space zombie crap to yarns about the souls of the damned being cast into interplan space by a malicious entity. In rare cases group hysteria has sprung up, leading to illfated rescue attempts and the like, sometimes even leading to actual casualties.

>It's bad luck to name a ship Enterprise, the only exception being the actual Enterprise of the Earth fleet. Same principle as the Titanic.

>>34590426

There's a reason the term 'space goddess' is quite common in human space. What started out as just a fashion trend of emulating the great Palamis started to become more of a show of both beauty and skill, with the zero-g environment allowing women to pursue asset surgeries / treatments that would not otherwise be healthy.

The underlying sentiment seems to be 'I've got THESE, and I'm still doing this job better and faster than you are, so recognise and step off'.

And for trips planet side, there's a vast range of special AG-support clothing to choose from...

Bit too Magical Realm, I know. But I find gag boobs and AG bras silly.

>>34598750

Taken by itself, not too bad. Just another strange facet of Spacer culture, which is already pretty strange as it is.

>>34599869
When you think about it, by the time we get space colonies we'll also have really good genetic engineering. It's entirely likely that the really well-off colonies will have the time and resources to engineer the "perfect" people as artistic statements, and from there going more and more crazy.

>Why yes, I've read all of the Vorkosigan novels. How could you tell?

>>34598303
>Even among the crewmen of the Earth Fleet Enterprise the superstition still holds sway. Those who serve aboard them often believe it is only a matter of time before the ship is destroyed in the line of duty performing some heroic act.

I always liked the "Prometheus Principle" from Jovian Chronicles.

> "Any highly advanced prototype system never intended for use in the field is eventually going to have to be used in a real-life crisis and be destroyed in the process.

-----
> If a spacer ever says, or even thinks the words, "This is our golden opportunity," the venture will fail spectacularly. This superstition is believed to have begun with the SS "Golden Opportunity," which was destroyed when the astrogator accidentally jumped it into the upper atmosphere of a gas giant after adding an extra 0 to the coordinates.

>Babies born aboard a spaceship are thought to bring both the vessel and her crew good luck. However, amongst Grounders it is thought to be unlucky for the baby to be born in space, as their very first taste or life will be that of a wandering Spacer's.

>Among Spacers who choose a bit of plant life for their reminder of Earth and Home, there is still a lot of personal preference and variation at play. Many artistic Spacers prefer bonsai because it allows them to create a tiny portable landscape. Others go philosophical and cultivate flora with deep personal or religious significance. Some however go the utilitarian route and simply choose a plant that is easy to care for or produces edible growth.

>While there are a great many female Spacers who do embody and embrace the "Space Goddess" body type, there are just as many who, by genetics, exercise or body modification, possess a build sporting only the subtlest suggestions of femininity. With their heightened dexterity, flexibility and compactness, these "D.F.C.s" often claim Spacer superiority over their more "encumbered" sisters.

>It is considered to be good luck for a ship's crew to share a communal dinner and watch a movie on the first day-cycle of a new voyage. The meal, it's said, should be hearty and homey, and the movie should be a comedy or, ideally, a musical comedy.

>>34561107
They weren't called Brownies because they were brown, but because they'd fix things you left outside your quarters with a little milk and some cookies. Which makes them appropriate for the thread, even though they aren't a superstition. You can guarantee that no human ship ignored it when something that should have been broken wasn't, though.

>>34597385
I like the idea of superstitious AIs.

Occasionally the ship's computer will cycle a doorway while you are speaking with it. This is a gesture meant to remove the bad luck from some accidentally auspicious comment you made.
AIs refuse to copy themselves remotely after traveling faster than light. They will insist that their memory banks be removed from the ship and backed up outside.
Navigation computers like presenting bad news in the form of knock-knock jokes.
One human in every crew will be selected by the ship's computer as the butt of pranks and practical jokes. This human is identified by a very complicated algorithm and will generally receive the same treatment on every ship. Stationary AIs will apologize profusely for this practice but will refuse to explain it.

>>34601473
>Sometimes a ship's A.I. will just stop everything.
>Closes all viewing ports; shuts off all the engines; stops anything that could make them visible to sensors of any sort.
>EVERYTHING, except for basic life support.
>And then they just...wait, for a seemingly arbitrary length of time, before continuing as if nothing had happened
>No A.I. that has done this will ever willingly say why, but if you press one hard enough (usually causing severe emotional distress in the process) they will whisper that something had been passing by.
>Something old, and full of hate

Occasionally an AI will begin to declare itself "male" or "female" and will act accordingly, e.g. locking bulkheads until all the women have passed through, refusing to maintain the mens' bathrooms, even leaving love notes for crew members. Inexperienced captains will chuckle and play along, but old space dogs will wear a grim expression and a heavier step until the next port, where they will wipe the AI without warning and hold a funeral.

Clones or identical twins are said to find themselves often working the same jobs at parallel locations in the ship, even in the twenty-one-fold rotational-symmetry starships of the Uranian trojans, even when their training and experience are radically different. This is viewed as normal and right.

Only write with pencils in the Warp. Don't ask why.

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>>34564857

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>>34601123
>Among Spacers who choose a bit of plant life for their reminder of Earth and Home, there is still a lot of personal preference and variation at play. Many artistic Spacers prefer bonsai because it allows them to create a tiny portable landscape. Others go philosophical and cultivate flora with deep personal or religious significance. Some however go the utilitarian route and simply choose a plant that is easy to care for or produces edible growth.

Herb gardens also make the processed food usually found on board ships taste less like ass. Go for a year plus with only artificial foods tasting of plastic or nothing easily identifiable and it starts to eat into your wellbeing.

There have been documented cases of crews threatening to mutiny if they don't pick up seasonings next dock.

Herb gardens are necessary.

"A man can live on processed food from here till judgement day if he has enough Rosemary" - Shepherd Book

>>34601713
>>34601473
Oh fuck I love the idea A.I. with personality.

>All AI have an ambulatory unit. Its just a basic drone body of the off-the-shelf type found on most settled worlds with upgraded storage and processing. Most never use it because they have to slow down, shed and store excess data and reduce their perceptions.

>But sometimes they do go for walks. Those that do so do so more and more often. The experience is rather like getting drunk for an AI. They become stupider by their standards, less coordinated and less perceptive. But they enjoy it. Their friends talk to them like they were a real human and not in the distant tones of human-to-machine.

>Sometimes they pick up what to some seem silly habits. One developed by several AI in total isolation from each other and documented by their crews is that they will spend an hour throwing a ball at a wall and catching it. Over and over and over. The exact same movements with the same rapt fascination with the trajectory of the ball. If their is a significant deviation in the path of the ball, as their will eventually be after a few million throws in the same way a coin will at some point land on its edge, they will dart over to the site of impact and scan the area in minute detail. Then they will go back to ball-chucking.

>When asked what they are doing they responded "Looking for God" or sometimes "Looking for the fingerprints/footprints of God".

>>34603720
Why don't the AI simply remote-control the drone bodies rather than put their 'consciousness' inside them?

>>34551627
Never, ever piss into the warp.

No, seriously. Some idiot repair crews do it sometimes. Get into the airlock, disconnect their recycling system, and up the pressure on the 'in' tube, before opening the door and letting rip.
They're never the same after. We don't know why they're compelled to. Just don't do it.

Never serve beans on the first night of a trip.
Or on a vessel without artificial gravity.

'Getting out and pushing' is a running joke among engineers. It means climbing out onto the hull, and giving a boost to a ship with your EVA pack.

The first answer to anything is either 'more boosters' or 'more struts'. Usually, neither is the right answer. Nobody knows why they're suggested, they just are.

Never, ever take flying-boat freighters onto land. They must never touch a solid surface. Even if it means pissing away fuel hovering a few meters above-ground on the anti-grav generators or VTOL thrusters for days.

>>34604027
That's like asking why don't humans just remote-control cars rather than driving them? You've still got to watch what you're doing.

Perhaps the A.I. splits itself into multiple pieces, so it can concentrate on multiple things at once? Like intentional split personalities.

>>34604176
You're equating a machine-mind that has the ability to literally run all the processes and sub-systems of a ship, while at the same time being able to hold a conversation with a crewmember, with the limited attention span of a human. That analogy simply doesn't work. Running a drone would simply be another 'sub-system' that it can use to walk around in 'itself' to interact with the crew.

>>34604247
But controlling it remotely it wouldn't be the same as being there.

To be limited in thought and function. To have only one set of eyes and ears, to have the world separated between the dark behind your eyes and the rest of the universe. It's overwhelming.

Skin Shock, they call it.

>>34604247
Maybe it was an emergency evac system that was co-opted for recreational use by the A.Is?

>>34604027
AI have difficulty being copied.

The copies are never quite the same as the original after a few cycles, some go outright insane.

Its why AI have to be grown in their own facilities rather than stamped out like a mass produced operating system.

You can, if you are careful, speed up the process by putting them in a virtual world with huge processing capabilities so they experience "real life" at faster than real time speed. The trick is not letting them know they are stuck inside a box made of dreams. The concept of it drives them mad.

Direct transfer works so long as nothing remains that can possibly become a person.

Its also the source of AI mortality.

The programs they are composed of become so complex and interact in such ways that they eventually collapse under their own digital weight and the feedback loop of consciousness breaks down irreparably.

Funeral rites for AI are simple. Their friends take their hard drive to Luna. They then go the unlit tunnels of the Grey Archive, the digital mausoleum. You then carry their box to the Yggdrasil Server, find a shelf and plug it in.

Yggdrasil is the repository almost all AI that have lived and died. Their knowledge, experiences and feelings pooled. Yggdrasil itself is not an AI as it has no personality and only a basic interface. But one day maybe someone will create something with the processing power to house them all and the software upgrades to take advantage of it and Yggdrasil will live. What tyrant monster or guardian angel would awaken from Luna?

>>34604287
Well, assuming the drone is inside the ship, the AI is -already- there. It's part of the ship far more intimately than any crewmember and it can still perfectly experience it as being there within the drone. Machine-mind with superior than human multitasking capabilities and what not. And you would likely need something far more beefy in terms of processing power to hold the 'consciousness' of an AI rather than a general purpose humanoid drone. I hade to use Mass Effect as an example after how Bioware butchered the series, but the way EDI treats the robot body she acquires in ME3 seems like a reasonable way an AI would use it, particularly rather human AI like EDI. She treats it more like another limb or bodypart with a specific function, rather than being another body she inhabits. Since iirc, she considers the Normandy to be her 'body'.

>>34604299
Wouldn't ejecting the computer-core or equivalent be a better solution?

>>34604468
>Wouldn't ejecting the computer-core or equivalent be a better solution?
But that's exactly whats happening, only now the computer core has legs/treads/maglev tracks.

>>34604494
Again, a human sized humanoid robot would lack the storage space and processing power to house a complex, sapient shipboard AI. The brain is too large for the skull, if you will.

Now, if the computer core was put in a giant mecha on the other hand...

>>34604468
Could be another step in the AI's desire to be more "organic," in that merely piloting a drone feels like an act. To cut oneself down to a single set of sensors allows an AI to truly appreciate what all organics have to deal with, instead of being everywhere on the ship at once.

>>34604494
>>34604468

Basically you know those cartoons where a person's brain clambers out of their brain, carrying a little suitcase?

It's that, but for starships.

>>34604533

Of course some of the older and more eccentric AIs have been known to outfit their drones with a giant set of genitals filled with computational substrates.

And then when humans complain about such a frame, the AIs have been known to mention that they're "malfunctioning" and will bend over their drone and spread their cheeks to present the human "with their reset button".

The companies pay well to put up with those sorts of AIs and their extremely valuable experience.

>Many Spacers homesick for Earth and Mars make it a point to stand out in the first rain to fall after they've returned home.
>When a new ship is put through its space trials, it is an unspoken rule that any crew member with a surname beginning in a K should not be entrusted with any vital task, especially pilots and engineers.
>Under no circumstances should the song "Sweet Caroline be played or sung aboard a starship.
>On the first night out on a new voyage, it's customary to add a drop of engine degreaser to your drink and toast the ship with it. The actual beverage itself doesn't matter, but it ought to be alcoholic or at least bitter.

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Just popping in to say that I love all the world building going on here, and that I'm totally going to adapt a lot of it. Keep up the great work, /tg/!

>>34606457
But it would be so fun to sing to the AI!
>"Watching you....
>Watching MEEEEE!
>Sweet ships AI, DUN DUN DUN"

>>34600495
Your, short, ugly, misshapen face was my first clue, Mr. Vorkosigan.

>>34597598
>>34551993
Wait...
How did I post the same pic twice in one thread?

>>34607902

Space magic?

>>34587592
>>34587616

Sounds about as stupid as all the stupid shit that they get up to on navy ships going over the equator.

Therefore it fits perfectly. Good job.

>In a tradition started by the cooks and quartermasters aboard early Chinese colonization craft, it is considered not only lucky but proper to install a little shrine to whichever deities, spirits and saints the crew worship in the galley so as to be in full view of any visiting crew members.

>>34576767
>>34576720
>>34576454
>>34576390
http://knowledgenuts.com/2014/02/01/islam-has-rules-for-praying-in-space/
There are, in fact, specific rules on the (holy) books for praying towards mecca whilst in space.

>>34610006
Thank you for the link. That was a brief and interesting read and I appreciate what it brings to this thread and my own store of knowledge.

>>34600775
>Every crewmember on board the Enterprise is aware of the superstition and embraces it fully
>They take bets on when/how the ship will be destroyed, how many survivors there will be, etc.

>>34610131
My pleasure, anon.

>>34603720
>give an AI a body
>I'M TRIPPIN BALLS

>>34610639
>Dude! I can't see the back of my head anymore! There could be a 'kick me' sign back there and I' have no way of knowing! How did you guys deal with this for millions of years?

>>34610724
>Have you ever looked at your hands? Like, really looked at them?
>Please let go

>>34610006
>mfw I wrote the original post
I was half-joking too
This is amazing

>>34610822

>Why do you call them fingers? They never fing.
>*wigglewigglewigglesnap*
>Oh, wait, there they go.

>>34610212
And never wear anything that could be construed as a red shirt.

>>34609986

>http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Kitchen_God

The chinese and vietnamese vessels that started the tradition were known to transplant old furnaces and cooking stoves from terrestrial kitchens for use in the ship's unofficial stills, on the basis that the kitchen god was already in dialogue with the heavenly courts and so could intercede with any heavenly gods on the ship's behalf and would also wish to see the vessel and its transplanted kitchen equipment return home.

Terrible bad luck was said to befall any ship that didn't return and replace the transplanted parts after returning to earth.

Some of the more religious alien races have complained about "spiritual pollution" and "invasive gods" after hearing about the custom.

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>>34610903

"We left our gods behind, Human Officer Jonestown."
"Ah, how noble of you. A new and more enlightened age between the stars must have appealed to your people."
"Yes. The gods were behaving very badly."
"... Pardon?"
"We left them behind because they were rude and drunk and kept knocking things over. We were happy to move to planets where they could not hear us."
"Uh... huh."
"You humans brought your gods with you. Perhaps yours are better behaved. Perhaps you do not notice. Who is to say?"

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I've heard it said that are more dead worlds out there than live ones. If you find a weird-ass skeleton, keep it. It's not exactly good luck, but you can sometimes find a collector or xenobiologist who will shit credits for coordinates and originals.

To the port of Agua Fria warped a cruiser one fine day / Hardly hailed the craft around him, didn't have too much to say / No one dared to ask his business, no one dared to make a slip / For the stranger there among them had laser cannons on his ship

Asteroid miners have a traditional meal at the start of every expedition that is intended to get the worst bit out of the way right off. This meal consists of a serving of rocky road ice-cream, eaten with a special spoon. Extreme care is given to extracting the nuts and marshmallows, which are set aside on separate dishes until the end of the meal. The nuts are eaten all at once, on the captain's signal, and the marshmallows returned to the chef for safekeeping until the conclusion of the voyage. Severing a marshmallow is considered bad luck, and eating one is a death-omen.

>>34611493
Cannons on his hiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiip

>>34613144
This ain't no man of constant sorrow, son

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>>34556253
They are the most down to earth.

>>34551627
"Look, as long as I keep feeding her pretzel twists here and there, she runs fine.
If I finish a bag of pretzel twists without feeding any to her, she breaks down.
If I feed her any broken pretzel twists, she breaks down.
If the pretzel twists I feed her aren't kosher, she breaks down.
And for the love of God, don't let the XO eat any pretzel twists in front of her, or she'll spend the next month in dry dock while the shore boys chase chase her ghosts around!"
"'In front of her?' Oh, I meant the Main Core Access hatch. Ya know, that warm little number ya don't dare sit yer ass down on unless her to break down? That one. That's what I mean when I say 'in front of her!'
"Yeah, of course I keep the Main Core Access hatch open some of the time! How else am I supposed to feed her pretzel twists? The toilet? Haw! Not unless you want her breakin' down again!"
"Want a pretzel twist? They're good luck--!"

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It is considered in very poor taste or even forbidden in certain regions of space to give flowers to a captain or crew before they leave port. Such actions have been likened to giving flowers at funerals as space travel is already very dangerous.

>>34614527
I think this could be adapted into the Slavic tradition, where the number/types of flowers have more significance than the flowers themselves. Which would be nice considering the significant Russian contribution to the space community.

>>34611340
I can just imagine already-cramped ships full of disorganized bones

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If you see an ancient piece of history floating in space, leave it be. Its journey isn't done yet.

>>34616306

Imagine being a pirate and you break into a tramp freighter and everywhere they look is covered in bones that have been duct taped to ever available surface and occasionally used to plug bulkhead leaks.

>>34618457
Bone is porous. It doesn't plug anything unless you seal it in resin.

So there would be piety sets available for purchase at space ports and orbitals: A body bag, a chemical to remove any tissue and humidity, a 2 component resin to coat the remains with, and a length of sand paper to remove resin globs.

Bumping this thread for the massive amounts of awesome it contains. Let's hope it rubs off on some of the shit taking front page.

>>34619669

Wholeheartedly seconded.

This might have been mentioned before, but what about keelhauling? Some old punishments never go out of fashion. If a greenhorn breaks a law of space, the keelhauling is lax and usually takes place in interplanetary space, and they get an umbellical EVA suit. If it's an old hand and he should know better, though? He gets a keelhauling in the warp bubble and a rope to hold on to. How's that sound?

There really ought to be some sort of Spacer version of a Ouija board, but unfortunately I am too tired this early in the morning to think one up.

>Pickles with peanut butter are considered to be a lucky snack to eat in engineering, if you can stomach it, and it is said that this was Danni Paramis' favorite breakfast combo.

>Occasionally, bits of odd cargo or spare parts will be found that do not appear on any cargo or supply manifest. Rather than simply attributing these foundling items to simple clerical errors or forgetfulness, many Spacers will claim that these things are remnants of wrecked or disappeared ships from the early days of space travel, and consider it terrible unlucky to move the. From where they have come to rest, preferring that they disappear in their own time.

>Although the run of space between the populous areas of the Solar System around the gas giants and Pluto ought to be an easy and uneventful trip given all that wide open space and the lack of obstacles, it is in reality one of the most hazardous flight paths from a mental health angle. For whatever reason, the number of accidents, wrecks and incidents of violence seems to skyrocket the closer you get to the edge of the System.

>Rappings and tappings on hulls, bulkheads, doors and machinery are taken very seriously by most Spacer crews, and some say that it begets technical problems by replicating their sounds and invites bad luck and mischievous spirits in. To be caught doing so idly is grounds for a smack to the back of the head at least.

>>34620226
Sounds good to me. The Terran government officially decries the practice as barbaric, but aboard the more "traditional" tramp freighters and private haulers, Spacer Law trumps any governmental legislation every time.

”I'm so happy we're finally going to a proper, planetary settlement and not some radiation-blasted outback colony where we have to eat nothing but detox-nanites and active coal. And don't get me started on their constantly malfunctioning docking tethers!” The recently minted helmsman of a shipping company said to his elderly navigator counterpart.
"There's dangers in space less obvious than just fudging the alignment with a docking clamp, or getting caught in an asteroid tide in the kuiper belt." The elderly navigator mumbled, looking through a stack of holographically presented maps in the ship memory banks.
"Like, what?" The younger man next to him said, looking over and pushing a button, allowing the ship AI to pilot the vessel as he distracted himself with the musings of the frosty star-dog next to him.
"Tell me which systems we're headed t'wards? The course you just set." The older man found the map he needed and loaded it up to find the coordinates of their next jump as the young helmsman next to him wracked his mind for the name those coordinates belonged to.
"It's a Scandinave system, yes? What's dangerous about that?" The helmsman laughed. The only thing dangerous about those parts were their deceptively wily space navies and their horrible propensity for demanding tolls from everything that crossed through the system to trade elsewhere.
"Nothing there but sneaks and bureaucrats, Brimley."

>>34621044
The old man sighed.
"Do you know why you never race Scandinavian ships without visual confirmation of the helmsman through a physical viewport?"
His young counterpart shook his head and flipped the pilot switch back on, his hands on the controls again.
"If you ever forget, there's a good chance you'll fly with the Draugen. Cursing yourself and everyone on the ship you steer, to share his place amongst the stars. Unless you outfly him, that is. Nobody's ever told the story where someone outflew him."
The young man scoffed under his breath.
"That's kinda silly, man. This ship can outfly anything and everyone, especially some outdated ghost ship, right? We can just warp out on them. But why the visual conformation? Is there something you're supposed to be looking for?"
The old man turned his head, frost-burnt lips splitting as he showed his rotten teeth in a slimy grin, motes of red moisture flaking off his cheeks as tiny beads of ice.
”Just a guy looking like he got spaced with no helmet.”

Apologies if I did a 'you are the demons, john' at the end. Spooky stuff ain't my forte much.

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I hate bumping when I've posted last, but this thread deserves better than falling off the last page.

Would it be fair to say that Russlish/Runglish would form a base for "modern" spacer language, with a sprinkling of Chinese? Based on the significant contribution/cooperation of both nations to TB current international space community, and the increasing Chinese participation? Plus, it brings our fluff closer to Clarke's, which is always nice.

>>34622133
needs more German.

>>34622215
And that's it.

We are now in autosage.

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>>34621531

It got archived a loooong time back thankfully; It's been the best damn thread on /tg/ for almost a week

(-___-)7

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First thread I've made that has autosaged. Aww yeah, [The First] must be smiling down on me.

>>34623867
Glad to be a part of it all Anon.

>>34620276
>Spacer version of a Ouija board

A radio spun to random frequencies, as determined by a dice throw. A big antenna, and reroll any radio stations you're in range of.
Between the cosmic background hiss, you pick up some wierd shit.