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>>35509096
You’re currently in a small, nondescript meeting room in Lowee's Basilicom. Its patron goddess, CPU White Heart, stands across from you, studying you without a hint of any emotion on her face other than expectant patience. Your experience with deities is admittedly limited, so you had half-expected there to be some sort of fanfare when she'd walked in, either sung by a choir of angels or screamed lamentations of her fallen enemies. You also thought she'd burst through the walls wielding her trademark maul, howling like an insane berserker as she harangues you for wasting a goddess's time.

CPU White Heart did none of these things; to all appearances, she's a normal girl done up in red and white with black and gold undertones, like some maid cafe's idea of a shrine maiden. She also looks astonishingly young, and not that much taller than you, but again, you KNOW that appearances aren't all they're cracked up to be in this godforsaken world of cutesy bullshit.

White Heart had greeted Ester warmly enough, even permitting herself a smile, but everything about her seemed restrained, as if she's more accustomed to keeping her cards close to her chest. The moment White Heart turned to you, her expression cooled down by a few degrees, waiting for you to speak up.

(Cont.)

>>35509111
It's... it's a little hard to speak when you're pinned down by that sort of stare. And you don't know jack squat about what's expected of you in this sort of situation; YOUR experience with nobles is that they're worthless wastes of space who tend to suffer accidents, but you really don't think your opening statement should be "so on a scale from one to ten, how useless are you?"

[ ] [INTRODUCE] Introduce yourself. Try not to be too awkward. Fail.
[ ] [SHARICITE] Cut straight to the chase: you're here to sell her a football-sized chunk of Sharicite.
[ ] [SMALL TALK] So! How about those frescoes outside, huh?
[ ] [ESTER] Stay silent. Let Ester do the talking. Hope Ester's going to do the talking.
[ ] [WRITE-IN]

>>35509134
>[x] [SMALL TALK] So! How about those frescoes outside, huh?
Time for best quest! Bquest.

>>35509134
>[ ] [SMALL TALK] So! How about those frescoes outside, huh?

>>35509134
>[ ] [INTRODUCE] Introduce yourself. Try not to be too awkward. Fail.
Time to impress best goddess

>>35509134
>[ ] [INTRODUCE] Introduce yourself. Try not to be too awkward. Fail.
>[ ] [SMALL TALK] So! How about those frescoes outside, huh?

>>35509134
>[ ] [SMALL TALK] So! How about those frescoes outside, huh?
>[ ] [WRITE-IN]
So, when was the last time you asked for a toilet seat made of Adamant and menacing of Salt Crystals?

>>35509134
>[ ] [INTRODUCE] Introduce yourself. Try not to be too awkward. Fail.
>[ ] [SMALL TALK] So! How about those frescoes outside, huh?

Urist better be a master flatterer.

>>35509134
>[SMALL TALK] So! How about those frescoes outside, huh?
They're really great, I'd love to make some engravings of them someday.

I mean, not to export or anything, just for myself.

I mean, not that they're not good enough to export, they are, but I'm certain you'd want such national treasures kept in Lowee.

I mean, not that I would presume to know what you would want, I know how you nobles are.

I mean-
So, should I go to the Hammerer now or wait?

HAIL BLORP!

>>35509134
>[X] [SMALL TALK] So! How about those frescoes outside, huh?
[X] [REFRESHMENTS] Politely inquire if there might perhaps possibly be some sort of liquor cabinet close by?

>>35509134
[x] Engrave an image of yourself eating cheese in White Hearts bedroom.

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Alright, looks like small talk is the highest vote so far, so!

>Urist Twelfthbay attempts to not be an awkward dork!
ROLL d20! (dice+1d20 in the email field)
Taking the best of three! DC 15

>>35509134
>[ ] [INTRODUCE] Introduce yourself. Try not to be too awkward. Fail.
>[ ] [SMALL TALK] So! How about those frescoes outside, huh?

Rolled 5 (1d20)

>>35509386

Rolled 17 (1d20)

>>35509386

Rolled 12 (1d20)

>>35509386
We can do this

Rolled 5 (1d20)

>>35509386

Rolled 19 (1d20)

>>35509386

>>35509403
Looks like the spaghetti stay in our pockets.

>>35509403
Oh good. Writing!

>>35509446
Next time, Anon.

Next time.

>>35509446
Not bad for a dorf with more problems than all the world's therapists could handle

>>35509111
>Red Blanc
So we're in V verse, or is it just a costume change?

>>35509964
Mostly just cosmetics; I like the red costume a bit better. Also, we're not in any specific 'verse, but that's probably less of an issue than it would be (since it feels like literally every other Neptunia game is its own separate canon).

>>35510085
Oh okay, I was mostly just wondering if we would get Neptune or Pururu or both, I guess I'll just have to wait and see

>>35509134
>>35509134
>[X] Intro!
>[X] Small talk!

You're fairly certain that if you could access your [V]iew, White Heart's name would be flashing like that of some sort of legendary weapons master, or forgotten terror from the bowels of the earth. Except White Heart would be beyond that, wouldn't she? Since she's a goddess and all, her name would probably be branded into the fabric of reality itself, burning with acrid smoke.

White Heart clears her throat, and the sound of it nearly gives you a heart attack. At the very last moment, you stop yourself from asking her if the Basilicom is rigged to pipe boiling hot magma into her chambers if she mandates the construction of diamond-studded toilet seats menacing with spikes of adamantium.

For lack of anything better to do, you hide behind stereotypical dwarven attitude and play the role up to the fucking hilt.

Hooking your thumbs into your belt, you gruffly introduce yourself- Urist Twelfthbay, freelancer, nice t'meetcher- and give her an equally gruff half-bow (shaking hands and testing her strength by squeezing her hand probably would be frowned upon). You dispense with the usual brown-nosing you'd give to nobles, and simply comment on the amazing frescoes and stained glass windows outside- masterfully engraved, truly beautiful, a national treasure of Lowee, don'cha know.

To your astonishment, you don't squeak, stammer, or belt out embarrassing thoughts. To your amazement, White Heart actually nods to you politely, like she would an equal. And when she replies, you're absolutely gobsmacked. Not by her voice, but... well.

"Glad you like them; I'll pass your compliments onto the artisans. Nice to meet you, Urist. You don't have to call me CPU White Heart all the time. Blanc will suffice."

(Cont.)

>>35510172
Armok's beard, White Heart talks like a /normal human being/. You're saved from thinking up a reply, since she's- Blanc's- already turning to Ester.

"That goes double for you, Ester," she chides. "You don't have to be so formal. We've known each other far too long for that. Anyway, what brings you here?"

You gulp, feeling yourself tense up like you would before a fight. This is it! You're no trader or negotiator, but you know that a certain showmanship is required, and that you can't just hand over the Sharicite like some sort of naive putz. It'll take some time as you haggle back and forth, but-

"This!" Ester chirrups, pulling the Sharicite out of her bag and handing it over to the shocked Blanc like some sort of naive putz.

You feel like crying a little, you really do- but that's what alcohol's for. Halfway through your third pull, you hear Blanc speak up, her voice unable to disguise her eagerness. "This is... it's been a long time since I've seen any chunk of Sharicite this big. I don't know what to say...!"

Ester crosses her arms and grins like she's a student being awarded a gold star. "Don't mention it! Your gratitude's more than enough for me... is what I'd LIKE to say," she hurriedly amends as you start choking on your alcohol in distraught, impudent fury, "but Urist here pitched in for more than her fair share."

(Cont.)

>>35510200
"Right." Blanc turns to face you again, a slight smile tugging at the edge of her lips at your reaction. "Adventurers will be adventurers. You seem more interesting than most of the freelancers I've met. Far more sensible, much less of a murderhobo."

You try not to look too ridiculously nervous as you laugh along. She really has no idea, and you'd like to keep it that way.

"I'll have the clerk wire the reward to both your respective Guild accounts, then."

... wait. Shit. Shit! You don't have an account with the Guild, you're a freelancer! Like, a completely unaffiliated freelancer- you don't even take on any nation's quests, all you do is dungeon dive for your own personal profit.

[ ] [GUILD] Ask if she can, like, wait until you pop over to the nearest Guild branch and register yourself. Who knows how much more business you'll end up doing with Lowee, you might as well take the plunge now.
[ ] [PLEAD] Ask if there's any way the Basilicom can just pay you in cold hard coinage. You don't feel like joining the Guild; you don't think you can meet the quest quotas the Guild requires you to take.
[ ] [SIDESTEP] Maybe Blanc can recompense you in some other way- information, advice, a favor to be called in later in the future. Armok knows you could use the help.
[ ] [BEER] It's been 10 seconds since your last drink. You could really use another.
[ ] [WRITE-IN]

>>35510227
>[x] [PLEAD] Ask if there's any way the Basilicom can just pay you in cold hard coinage. You don't feel like joining the Guild; you don't think you can meet the quest quotas the Guild requires you to take.
[x] [BEER] It's been 10 seconds since your last drink. You could really use another.

>>35510227
>[ ] [PLEAD] Ask if there's any way the Basilicom can just pay you in cold hard coinage. You don't feel like joining the Guild; you don't think you can meet the quest quotas the Guild requires you to take.
>[ ] [BEER] It's been 10 seconds since your last drink. You could really use another.

>>35510227
>SIDESTEP

>>35510227
>[ ] [SIDESTEP] Maybe Blanc can recompense you in some other way- information, advice, a favor to be called in later in the future. Armok knows you could use the help.
>[ ] [BEER] It's been 10 seconds since your last drink. You could really use another.

>>35510227
>[ ] [BEER] It's been 10 seconds since your last drink. You could really use another.
>[ ] [GUILD] Ask if she can, like, wait until you pop over to the nearest Guild branch and register yourself. Who knows how much more business you'll end up doing with Lowee, you might as well take the plunge now.
Just give her like ten twenty minutes

>>35510227
>[x] [BEER] It's been 10 seconds since your last drink. You could really use another.
>[x] [PLEAD] Ask if there's any way the Basilicom can just pay you in cold hard coinage. You don't feel like joining the Guild; you don't think you can meet the quest quotas the Guild requires you to take.

Even if she doesn't have spare coinage, she probably has plenty of equivalents.

>>35510227
>[ ] [BEER] It's been 10 seconds since your last drink. You could really use another.
>[ ] [WRITE-IN]
Demand Payment in the form of Miyamoto's Autograph.
...Or a free night in the Official Love Hotel.

>>35510227
>[ ] [BEER] It's been 10 seconds since your last drink. You could really use another.
>[ ] [SIDESTEP] Maybe Blanc can recompense you in some other way- information, advice, a favor to be called in later in the future. Armok knows you could use the help.

>>35510227
[ ] [SIDESTEP] Maybe Blanc can recompense you in some other way- information, advice, a favor to be called in later in the future. Armok knows you could use the help.
[ ] [BEER] It's been 10 seconds since your last drink. You could really use another.

We want information on the any other land besides the 4 that we know of.

>>35510227
[ ] [PLEAD] Ask if there's any way the Basilicom can just pay you in cold hard coinage. You don't feel like joining the Guild; you don't think you can meet the quest quotas the Guild requires you to take.

>>35510227
She doesn't suspect us. Commence murderhobo-ing.

> [ ] [PLEAD] Ask if there's any way the Basilicom can just pay you in cold hard coinage. You don't feel like joining the Guild; you don't think you can meet the quest quotas the Guild requires you to take.
> [ ] [BEER] It's been 10 seconds since your last drink. You could really use another.

>>35510227
>[ ] [PLEAD] Ask if there's any way the Basilicom can just pay you in cold hard coinage. You don't feel like joining the Guild; you don't think you can meet the quest quotas the Guild requires you to take.
or [SIDESTEP]

>>35510227
>BEER
>More BEER

>>35510379
Don't say anything, just look her in the eye and drink.

>>35510405
Be polite and offer her some.

>>35510227
>[X] BEEEEEEEEER
>[X] oh and also plead

Blanc is giving you an extremely flat stare, her eyebrows quirking up in some ungodly mixture of curiosity and censure. Ester's grin is a little strained, and you can see a light sheen of sweat on her brow.

You have no idea what's gotten them so scandalized, but then you taste the beer swilling into your mouth and realize that your flask somehow got into your hand without you noticing. So you do the only thing you can do, under the circumstances: stare down CPU White Heart and keep drinking, the alcohol taking the edge off your worries.

At length, Blanc speaks up again when you're on your ninth draw of the flask. While she isn't angry, she isn't exactly approving, either. "... I have never seen anyone drink so much at once without turning into a weaving, stuttering mess."

Well, you ARE a dwarf. You need alcohol like a fish needs water.

"I never knew that," the goddess muses. "I suppose I'll never be able to see Snow White in the same light ever again."

If it helps, you have it on good knowledge that those seven sure as hell had some problems. Seriously, what sane dwarf would live in a defenseless above-ground cottage, unprotected by walls, traps, or inexplicable flows of magma? Doc and the rest probably ran out of money for alcohol and went completely sober, the poor schmucks.

"You don't say. I thought they were mining for diamonds."

Maybe they couldn't get paid because they weren't signed up with the Guild. Not everyone can meet their completed quest quotas.

Blanc meets your blank stare with one of her own. "Yes. I suppose you're going to follow that up with a statement that you'd like to avoid meeting that godforsaken fate, correct? And that you would like your payment up front?"

Took the words right out of your mouth, ma'am.

(cont.)

>>35511291
"Blanc's fine." She shakes her head in amusement, glancing at Ester. The Dragon Warrior looks like she isn't sure whether she wants to laugh, cry, or be absolutely mortified, so she's pretty close to doing all of the above. "Ester?"

"I can vouch for Urist," Ester manages to squeak out. "Wouldn't have gotten that legendary Sharicite if it weren't for her."

"... well, for something like this, the Basilicom can make an exception. Just this once, though." Blanc cradles the Sharicite in her arms, absentmindedly stroking it as if it were some sort of precious endangered species. "The clerks will have your payment by the end of the day, if not sooner-"

The door slams open as one of the (BEARDED!) priests stumbles in. "Lady White Heart! There's- there's a disturbance outside the Basilicom!"

Blanc gives him a somewhat tired stare. "... could you possibly be any more vague?"

"Monsters are flying in from the sky!" the priest stammers. "Two freelance adventurers are keeping them at bay, but-"

"They probably have it well in hand, then. Tell the guards to keep an eye on things."

"N-No, but it's..." The old man's face screws up in distaste, making him look somewhat like a dried up prune. "It's /those/ two adventurers. You know the ones."

(Cont.)

>>35511312
A thundercloud seems to pass over Blanc's face as she tilts her head. It's not really a figure of speech; for a moment, the upper part of her face seems to be lost in shadows, and her eyes take on a decidedly /unamused/ light. "Motherfucking goddamned assholes," she hisses, growling out the curses as easily as air. Plopping the Sharicite chunk down onto the desk, Blanc strides toward the door leading to the rest of the Basilicom. "I'll take care of this."

... she seems to have forgotten about you and Ester. The Dragon Warrior unsheathes her sword and readies her shield, making to follow Lowee's goddess; she actually looks pretty damn happy about this turn of events, for some reason. "Okay! Urist, we've totally got this covered, so if you wanna head back first-"

[ ] [WATCH] Sure! It's not everyday you get to see a goddess slam some unsuspecting assholes into the ground, and CPU White Heart in action should be pretty cool.
[ ] [JOIN] OH no, you're not missing out on this. What kind of a dwarf would you be if you did?
[ ] [NOPE] Take up Ester's offer, check up on the catgirl. You're not really sure you want to get caught up in the wake of one royally pissed off goddess, and you also want to make sure the catgirl hasn't gone completely insane due to quantum stockpile.
[ ] [WRITE-IN]

>>35511342
>[x ] [JOIN] OH no, you're not missing out on this. What kind of a dwarf would you be if you did?

So, when do we enter a martial trance?

>>35511342
>[x] [NOPE] Take up Ester's offer, check up on the catgirl. You're not really sure you want to get caught up in the wake of one royally pissed off goddess, and you also want to make sure the catgirl hasn't gone completely insane due to quantum stockpile.

She's probably already gone, but let's check anyway.

>>35511342
>[x] [WATCH] Sure! It's not everyday you get to see a goddess slam some unsuspecting assholes into the ground, and CPU White Heart in action should be pretty cool.

>>35511342
>[ ] [WATCH] Sure! It's not everyday you get to see a goddess slam some unsuspecting assholes into the ground, and CPU White Heart in action should be pretty cool.

>>35511342
>[ ] [JOIN] OH no, you're not missing out on this. What kind of a dwarf would you be if you did?
Sorry for embarrassing you Ester, Urist didn't mean it, sorta

>>35511342
>[ ] [JOIN] OH no, you're not missing out on this. What kind of a dwarf would you be if you did?
>[ ] [DRINK]

>>35511342
>[ ] [WATCH] Sure! It's not everyday you get to see a goddess slam some unsuspecting assholes into the ground, and CPU White Heart in action should be pretty cool.

We're totally not afraid of bugging out in front of the Goddess and entire population of Lowee. We just don't feel like fighting right now is all.

>>35511342
[ ] [WRITE-IN]
Get that Sharicite to some sort of vault.
Then
>[ ] [NOPE] Take up Ester's offer, check up on the catgirl. You're not really sure you want to get caught up in the wake of one royally pissed off goddess, and you also want to make sure the catgirl hasn't gone completely insane due to quantum stockpile.

>>35511342
>[ ] [JOIN] OH no, you're not missing out on this. What kind of a dwarf would you be if you did?
What kind of dwarf doesn't run headlong into danger after drinking that much?

>>35511342
>[ ] [JOIN] OH no, you're not missing out on this. What kind of a dwarf would you be if you did?

>>35511342
>[ ] [JOIN] OH no, you're not missing out on this. What kind of a dwarf would you be if you did?
We is a fightin dorf!

>>35511342
[X] [NOPE]
I want to go check on best catgirl and try to convince her to switch to light bowgun

>>35511342
>[ ] [JOIN] OH no, you're not missing out on this. What kind of a dwarf would you be if you did?
SETTLE IT IN SMASH!

>>35511342
>[ ] [JOIN] OH no, you're not missing out on this. What kind of a dwarf would you be if you did?

>>35511342
>[ ] [JOIN] OH no, you're not missing out on this. What kind of a dwarf would you be if you did?

>>35511342
>[ ] [WATCH] Sure! It's not everyday you get to see a goddess slam some unsuspecting assholes into the ground, and CPU White Heart in action should be pretty cool.

>>35511342
>[X] Beer, blood, booze and thunder!

You're about to protest being sent back to the hotel like some sort of NPC, but Ester's already skipping off, calling out to Blanc to wait for her. Suppressing a growl, you pull out your crossbow and equip your quiver- like, EQUIP equip your quiver, making sure that your bolts aren't going to get you caught in some bullshit "equipment mismatch" loop.

Before you rush out of the room, you grab the priest's arm and tell him to go stash that Sharicite someplace safe. You ALSO have no intention of getting caught in some equally bullshit side quest where you have to track down an opportunistic thief. NOTHING will delay your payday.

(Cont.)

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>>35511768
As you exit the office, you realize that the Basilicom's a bit more crowded than it was before; looks like most of the tourists are hiding indoors, cowering behind pillars or underneath desks. Some of the smarter ones are making their way to the emergency exits in the back, intent on putting as much distance as they can between the fracas outside and their fragile civilian selves as possible. That's not too surprising; whatever's going on outside is /loud/, apparently involving yelling and screaming and what sounds like the buzzing of a trillion angry bees.

You're heading right toward that. In no way does that count as 'smart,' but then, you're a dwarf, so it's only to be expected.

The moment you step foot outside the Basilicom, you catch a glimpse of White Heart slamming something squishy and unpleasant with a gigantic maul- Blanc transformed into her combat state, her shoulderless combat bikini exactly as it appeared in the frescoes. Ester's got her back, cutting at something large and black and buzzing.

"DEMACIAAAAAAAA!"

And there's some sort of horrible blue screamy bladed spinning top hurtling forward at a thousand miles an hour, destroying streetlights and cafe chairs and WHAT THE FUCK IT'S HEADED RIGHT TOWARD YOU-

>Urist Twelfthbay tries not to get gibbed!
ROLL d20! (dice+1d20 in the email field)
Taking the best of three! DC: 14, crit at 18-20

Rolled 19 (1d20)

>>35511799
Don't die

Rolled 2 (1d20)

>>35511799

Rolled 2 (1d20)

>>35511799

Rolled 14 (1d20)

>>35511799
Time to make it up to Ester and Blanc

>>35511828
Well, guess we got a crit then.

>>35511799
Oh shit. League-chan.

>>35511828
>>35511834
>>35511835
Nice save
Nice crit

>>35511876
The other hero is going to be DOTA-chan isn't it?

>>35511919
I bet

>>35511974
I personally think it's gotta be Sonic. I mean, Blue spinning razor sharp thing? Come on.

>>35512082
Sonic is a Sega thing, she would be in Planeptune, plus the whole
>"DEMACIAAAAAAAA!"

>>35512082
Demacia is a place from LoL, the joke is it's the place where the character that the meme "spin 2 win" came from.

>>35512147
B-but League isn't a console game!

Does this mean we'll meet Counter Strike-chan?

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>>35511799
>2, 2, 19

You almost choke.

For what feels like an eternity, you're fixed to the ground, staring at the oncoming maelstrom in absolute horror. There's no way you can dodge in time- if you jump to the sides and that sword will open up your head like a metal can. If you fall back, you'll get mowed down by this horrible, screaming force of nature. This is it, this is the end, you can't hope to fight this sort of spinning-

And then you get a hold of yourself, duck underneath the sword, and slam the butt of your crossbow into the maelstrom's gut. The whirlwind stops cold, resolving itself into a blue-garbed swordswoman who apparently forgot to put on pants, and falls over with a rather undignified whimper. You dodge out of the way as another swordswoman, this one flaming red, wearing a mask, and probably shirtless, immediately falls on Maelstrom Bitch and begins kicking the shit out of her, laughing madly and screaming something about low eel-o's and never crawling out of the trench.

... goddamn. You're starting to see why Blanc doesn't think much of freelancers. Looking around at the trail of destruction left behind by Maelstrom Bitch and her stupid fiery-headed friend, well... at least that's one less thing to worry about.

(Cont.)

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>>35512221
You turn your attention back to White Heart and Ester, finally getting a good look at their opponents and- goddammit, they're giant black flies, what the absolute HELL is this, whatever the fuck happened to cutesy monsters!?

"Whatever the fuck happened to cutesy monsters!?" White Heart roars in an uncanny mirror of your own thoughts, swatting a fly out of the air so hard that it explodes into its component parts. "And why won't they stop coming!?" She doesn't stop there, using the momentum of her swing to blindside another of the things and knocking it into the arc of Ester's sword swing.

There's a sort of close familiarity and horrible beauty to the way the two of them fight, like a well-oiled machine that takes in monsters and shits out gory chunks. You're not sure they need someone charging in to hammer flies with them; it looks like they've got that sorted out. But there are a LOT of these damned things, and seriously, no one can fight forever.

[ ] [LOCK & LOAD] Aid White Heart and Ester; shoot as many flies out of the air as you can.
[ ] [BOSS] Look for a boss, or a bigger fly, or whatever the hell's controlling these things.
[ ] [BACKUP] Try to find some other adventurers to help you.
[ ] [GDIT] Join the red-haired swordswoman in kicking the blue-garbed Ms. Maelstrom.
[ ] [WRITE-IN]

>>35512250
>[x] [LOCK & LOAD] Aid White Heart and Ester; shoot as many flies out of the air as you can.

We can at least so crowd control

>>35512250
>[ ] [BACKUP] Try to find some other adventurers to help you.
Oi nerds, shut up and help

>>35512198
>B-but League isn't a console game!
Neither is DF.

>Does this mean we'll meet Counter Strike-chan?
I hope so.

>>35512250
>[ ] [BOSS] Look for a boss, or a bigger fly, or whatever the hell's controlling these things.

>>35512250
>[ ] [LOCK & LOAD] Aid White Heart and Ester; shoot as many flies out of the air as you can.

>>35512250
>[x] [LOCK & LOAD] Aid White Heart and Ester; shoot as many flies out of the air as you can.

>>35512250
>[ ] [BOSS] Look for a boss, or a bigger fly, or whatever the hell's controlling these things.

>>35512250
>[ ] [BACKUP] Try to find some other adventurers to help you.
>[ ] [WRITE-IN]
Smack Red and Blue upside the head, take command, tell them to stop being stupid murderhobo gits and to lane those fucking flies like proper fucking late-game jargon!

>>35512250
>[ ] [BOSS] Look for a boss, or a bigger fly, or whatever the hell's controlling these things.
Smack the red-haired idiot. They brought these things, they can fight them.

>>35512250
>[MOBANADO] Tie up LoL and DOTA and throw them into the fray.

>>35512250
>[ ] [LOCK & LOAD] Aid White Heart and Ester; shoot as many flies out of the air as you can.
>Kick that ASSFAGGOT later

>>35512250
>[ ] [LOCK & LOAD] Aid White Heart and Ester; shoot as many flies out of the air as you can.
Crowd control time.

>>35512250
>[ ] [BOSS] Look for a boss, or a bigger fly, or whatever the hell's controlling these things.
There's usually one right?

>>35512250
>[ ] [BOSS] Look for a boss, or a bigger fly, or whatever the hell's controlling these things.

>>35512250
ugly boss fly needs smacking
or at least our girlish screams will direct esten and the cpu to it

>>35512250
>[x] [BOSS] Look for a boss, or a bigger fly, or whatever the hell's controlling these things.

>>35512250
>[X ] [LOCK & LOAD] Aid White Heart and Ester; shoot as many flies out of the air as you can.

>>35512250
>[ ] [LOCK & LOAD] Now is the time. Strike down the White Oppressor, and usher in the glorious reign of the Democratic Insects' Republic.

ALRIGHT, looks like it's basically a close call between Lock & Load and Look for the Boss, so why not both?

>Urist Twelfthbay cancels current task: Interrupted by Giant Fly
ROLL d20! (dice+1d20 in the email field)
Taking the best of three! DC: 15, crit at 20

Rolled 6 (1d20)

>>35512544

Rolled 3 (1d20)

>>35512544

Rolled 11 (1d20)

>>35512544

Rolled 8 (1d20)

>>35512544

Rolled 11 (1d20)

>>35512544
rolan

>>35512560
>>35512564
>>35512566
Yippee.

>>35512560
>>35512564
>>35512566
You know, all things considered we've had a pretty good run.

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>>35512560
>>35512564
>>35512566
Writing!

>>35512560
>>35512564
>>35512566
Well we probably didn't shoot anyone at least

>>35512593
this is adorable

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>>35512731
Agreed.

>>35512731
You're adorable

>>35512250
>>35512250
>DC Failed

Right. Charging straight into the swarm to look for the boss would kind of be a problem, so that's right out. And White Heart and Ester can handle themselves in melee. Might as well provide some ranged support and thin out the herd! A feral grin tugs at your lips as you ready your trusty crossbow, reaching for the first bolt-

You freeze up, your grin turning into a confused frown. You... you can't- you can't get your bolts out of the quiver. Sweat beads your forehead as you keep digging, panic rising in your chest. This is insane- your fingers pass right through them, but you can't GRAB them, why can't you grab them!? What the fuck- they're the wrong ammo type? But you only have ONE ammo type, and it's BOLTS, it doesn't matter which ones you mark for combat and which one you mark as training use only-

Unbeknownst to you in the heat of the moment, DFHack pings in your pocket and activates itself with a hum, smoothing out some of the knots in your coding.

>Enabled tweak: training-ammo

- and your fingers finally find purchase on your bolts. You almost sob with relief as you load your crossbow before raising it to the sky, looking for a target to-

There's a mad cackle from behind. "Urist Twelfthbay!" You whip around, staring as a fly easily twice as big as its minions buzzes right toward you, mouthpieces dripping and arms outstretched. "You're mine! All mine!"

What is this? Why is this happening? Is this some sort of horrible divine punishment for all the long boring conversations and fresco descriptions you spent the last half-day suffering through?

In the corner of your vision, you see Ester and White Heart barreling toward the boss, but you really don't think they'll get here in time.

[ ] [FIRE!] Shoot the fucker out of the sky!
[ ] [RETREAT!] Leave Ester and White Heart to deal with him!!
[ ] [TALK] Ask him what you ever did to giant horrible fly monsters! Your game doesn't even HAVE giant fly monsters in it!!
[ ] [WRITE-IN]

>>35512935
>[BEER] Throw alcohol on him

>>35512935
>[ ] [FIRE!] Shoot the fucker out of the sky!
Well, we got it all loaded and aimed and stuff, so...

>>35512935
>[ ] [TALK] Ask him what you ever did to giant horrible fly monsters! Your game doesn't even HAVE giant fly monsters in it!!
honestly, for the sake of curiosity over any strategic usefulness

>>35512935
>[x] [TALK] Ask him what you ever did to giant horrible fly monsters! Your game doesn't even HAVE giant fly monsters in it!!

Diplomacy can't fail us!

>>35512935
>[ ] [FIRE!] Shoot the fucker out of the sky!

>>35512935
>[x ] [FIRE!] Shoot the fucker out of the sky!
Fire the cat at him.

>>35512935
>[x] [TALK] Ask him what you ever did to giant horrible fly monsters! Your game doesn't even HAVE giant fly monsters in it!!
>[x] [BEER] It's never not time for beer.

>>35512935
>[ ] [FIRE!] Shoot the fucker out of the sky!

>>35512935
>[ ] [TALK] Ask him what you ever did to giant horrible fly monsters! Your game doesn't even HAVE giant fly monsters in it!!
>[ ] [FIRE!] Shoot the fucker out of the sky!

>>35512935
[ ] [TALK] Ask him what you ever did to giant horrible fly monsters! Your game doesn't even HAVE giant fly monsters in it!!
[ ] [FIRE!] Shoot the fucker out of the sky!

Then take a swig, your a dwarf.

>>35512935
>[X] Every option at once, apparently!

You can't deal with this! There are, like, five trillion plot points all converging on your head at once, one right after the other! You pop open your flask before you even know what you're doing, your lips quivering in anticipation of the liquid courage soon to be burning its way down to your stomach-

>Urist Twelfthbay cancels drink: Interrupted by Giant Fly Boss.

... you promised yourself you wouldn't cry. You raise your crossbow and fire off a few shots as you retreat. Your aim is absolutely horrendous, but at least you're forcing the fly to slow the fuck down. Seriously, who the hell is this thing, and why does it know your name!?

Narrowly avoiding your bolts, the giant fly jinxes to the side and laughs again, a horrible buzzing thing that sends shivers crawling up your spine. "Forgotten me already, have you, Urist!? After all I did to you! After all you did to ME!!"

The hell is it talking about? You've never even SEEN a giant fly before!

"Of course you don't remember." The fly dodges again, bringing it closer to you. "Of course! I made sure of that, you see!"

You don't have time to formulate a reply- you retreat again, wildly trying to track the thing's movements with your crossbow, but the fly's started picking up speed. Only a desperate dodge keeps you from falling victim to its quick lunge and the snap of its mouth parts, but you're plum out of options and the fly lunges again-

(Cont.)

>>35513430
The Dragon Warrior's voice rings out, monotone as if mimicking primitive text-scrolling noises. "Ester casts Turn-Based Battle! Giant Fly Boss A is caught in its effect!"

- and the fly freezes in midair, unable to attack. The world around you shifts imperceptibly, as if acquiescing to these new rules for now. "What the- what IS this!?"

A shadow quickly falls over you, and you look up- only to quickly backpedal out of the way as White Heart plummets down to earth, maul-first. "Get the FUCK out of my town, shithead!" she roars, all traces of the calm, demure goddess replaced by this tiny vision of wrath.

... strangely enough, you don't see any other giant flies left.

[ ] [BLANC] For the love of god, let Blanc take the kill, this probably won't be the last you see of the giant flies anyway!
[ ] [STOP] Forget Blanc's bloodthirsty murder wrath, you REALLY kind of want to interrogate this thing. There are too many questions left unanswered!
[ ] [ESTER] No, really, what the hell did she do and how did she do it!?
[ ] [MOBAs] Go make sure Red and Blue didn't sneak off. Blanc might want to chew them out after the fly's done.
[ ] [BEER] Okay, NOW you can take that drink.
[ ] [WRITE-IN]

>>35513430
>"Forgotten me already, have you, Urist!? After all I did to you! After all you did to ME!!"

>"Of course you don't remember." The fly dodges again, bringing it closer to you. "Of course! I made sure of that, you see!"

"THEN WHY THE FUCKING ARE YOU COMPLAINING?"

>>35513451
>[ ] [MOBAs] Go make sure Red and Blue didn't sneak off. Blanc might want to chew them out after the fly's done.

>>35513451
>[ ] [STOP] Forget Blanc's bloodthirsty murder wrath, you REALLY kind of want to interrogate this thing. There are too many questions left unanswered!
>[ ] [BEER] Okay, NOW you can take that drink.
>[ ] [WRITE-IN]
Use Blanc as thread of smushing if the fly don't talk.

>>35513451
[x] [BEER] Okay, NOW you can take that drink.
[x] [BEER] Okay, NOW you can take that drink.
[x] [BEER] Okay, NOW you can take that drink.
[x] [BEER] Okay, NOW you can take that drink.
[x] [BEER] Okay, NOW you can take that drink.

Maybe we can ask Blanc to pay in beer. We're going to need it.

>>35513451
>[ ] [STOP] Forget Blanc's bloodthirsty murder wrath, you REALLY kind of want to interrogate this thing. There are too many questions left unanswered!

>>35513451
>[ ] [BLANC] For the love of god, let Blanc take the kill, this probably won't be the last you see of the giant flies anyway!
Goooo Blanc! Show them why you're the best goddess.

>>35513451
>[x] [BLANC] For the love of god, let Blanc take the kill, this probably won't be the last you see of the giant flies anyway!
>[x] [BEER] Okay, NOW you can take that drink.

>>35513451
>[x] [BLANC] For the love of god, let Blanc take the kill, this probably won't be the last you see of the giant flies anyway!
>[x] [BEER] Okay, NOW you can take that drink.

>>35513451
>[ ] [DONE] You are so fucking done with this.
>[ ] [BEER] Okay, NOW you can take that drink.

>>35513451
>Beer
only appropriate response

>>35513451
>[ ] [ESTER] No, really, what the hell did she do and how did she do it!?

>>35513475
>Finding the logical fallacy in the murderous giant fly's thought process.

... i wonder if it is possible that we transformed someone into a fly.

>>35513451
not a vote but
>[ ] [ESTER] No, really, what the hell did she do and how did she do it!?
shouldn't we have been around long enough to know about the existance of turn based combat?
and we already know that moe personifications can apply their innate rules to reality to their advantage, as we did with that boss and the cats.

>>35513745
It's probably just what it looks like.

A giant bug.

>>35513451
>[X] [STOP] Forget Blanc's bloodthirsty murder wrath, you REALLY kind of want to interrogate this thing. There are too many questions left unanswered!
>[X] [BEER] Okay, NOW you can take that drink.

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>>35513451
>[X] [BLANC]
>[X] [BEEEEEER]

You know, you probably should worry about how this giant fly seems to know your name, why it appears to be fixated on your bloody demise, and why it's pissed that you forgot all about it AND claimed that it was the one who made you forget. Someone who's got her priorities in order might even risk Blanc's wrath to rope the damn bug in for questioning, and figure out how giant flies got into the city without even being seen.

'Course, you've got more pressing things to worry about, so you shoulder your crossbow and drain your flask all the way down to its /fumes/, reveling in the sound and sight of a screaming CPU White Heart reducing a screaming giant fly to a slushy smear on the pavement.

Ester walks over to you, not sheathing her sword. "Urist? You're okay, right? Not injured or anything?"

Nope. Never been better, you reply with a grin.

... that grin falters a little bit as White Heart stomps up to you, looking ready to reduce YOU to a slushy smear on the pavement. "- and YOU! What were you thinking, training those sons of bitches back to the Basilicom!? You could've gotten someone-"

Wait, no, you've never seen anything like that in your life! Honest!

White Heart growls, her murderage fading a little as she shoots a glance to Ester. The Dragon Warrior appears undaunted, grinning her usual carefree smile. "It's not from the ruins, either. I would've remembered legendarily giant insects!"

(Cont.)

>>35514061
After a moment, the CPU relents, whirling away to where the swordswomen had been beating the shit out of each other. "And YOU two! What did I tell you about fighting in the middle of- godDAMMIT they did a runner! Again!!" White Heart stomps her foot a bit petulantly, although the gesture is considerably less childish since it cracks the pavement; one deep, calming breath and flash of light later, she undoes her transformation, reappearing as the ever-calm Blanc.

Although there's still a sort of frustrated tension in her forehead and around her eyes, enough to make you still fear for your life. "Thanks for your help. Especially with Tweedledee and Tweedledum." ... ah, the swordswomen. "We'll have your payment by the end of the day. Are you sure you won't reconsider joining the International Guild?"

"Hey, if you do, I can put in a good word for you!" Ester adds smoothly, sheathing her sword and giving you a thumbs-up.

... well. On one hand, it might not be too bad, having steady work and some sense of going up in the world; on the other hand, while there ARE dungeon-crawling quests, you'll have less time to go dungeon-crawling on your own terms. And you've got a few tasks to take care of, to boot.

And while Blanc just might not want to have to deal with the paperwork inherent in paying someone outside the system, you can't help but feel that there's something else behind her nudging, too.

[ ] [REFUSE] Nope. Gonna stick with our earlier agreement, if that's okay; you're not fond of the downsides of the Guild.
[ ] [AGREE] Alright, you're okay with registering with the Guild. Can't deny that it has its perks. Like comrade-in-arms.
[ ] [QUESTION] What else is in it for Blanc, if you sign up?
[ ] [WRITE-IN]

>>35514079
>[X] [QUESTION] What else is in it for Blanc, if you sign up?

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>>35514079
>[ ] [QUESTION] What else is in it for Blanc, if you sign up?

>>35514079
>[ ] [QUESTION] What else is in it for Blanc, if you sign up?
Is Ester in a guild?

>>35514079
>[X] [QUESTION] What else is in it for Blanc, if you sign up?

>>35514079
>"Eh...thanks for the offer, but I like being a freelancer. I work when I want, where I want, and my alcoholism is as much a drive as a crutch. Can't get more dwarfy than that."

>>35514079
>[ ] [QUESTION] What else is in it for Blanc, if you sign up?

>>35514079
>[ ] [QUESTION] What else is in it for Blanc, if you sign up?

>>35514079
>[ ] [QUESTION] What else is in it for Blanc, if you sign up?
>[ ] [WRITE-IN]
I heard tell of an indestructible material only found here. If you can get me some, I might be more likely to join.

>>35513766
Urist wasn't confused about turn-based combat, she was confused about how Ester was able to lay it onto the world so easily.

What Urist did with her cats was a little bit different- "I will summon beasts that have a certain effect on the world" versus "I will directly exert my will on the world and force X rules on it." It's a pretty big leap in power.

>>35514133
Answering, 'cause it's basic knowledge in-character! Ester's in the International Guild (the guild in question, and the only one that matters for most adventurers); it compiles quests from all nations for its members to take up. They can pick and choose which quests to take, as long as they fill up a monthly quota.

Also, Question wins by a landslide, so writing!

>>35514079
if i had to bet. joining a guild means paying a % of income as tax to them.
of which a % is taken up back in tax for the CPUs.
meaning she will get some of her money back on paying us...

that, or maybe she is just trying to make an honest woman out of us.

ah hell. relent. we already got a party consisting of ester and catgirl. and ester did save our life. might as well become a proper guildy.

>>35514229
While we're asking questions, could we ask for a refill for our flask? We're going to start havin sobriety shakes in a few seconds.

>>35514411
I think we drank enough to hold us off more than a few seconds.

>>35514411
>asking
Are you some kind of elf? We'll go and buy some more liquor once we get our pay. We can last until then.

... Probably.

>>35514079
>[X] [QUESTION]

You don't directly answer the question, instead looking up to meet the taller goddess's eyes, and you choose your words carefully. Blanc seems pretty insistent about wanting you to join the International Guild. Is there anything that's in it for her-

"Of course there is," Blanc snaps, cutting you off. She takes a moment to gather herself, closing her eyes and taking a breath; she's calmer when she speaks up again. "The two idiots you saw chewing up the city and endangering citizens? Those were Guild-less freelancers, too. Basically, they're outlaws. I can bar them from coming into the city, I can have them locked up if they're caught here, but since they're not in the Guild, I can't keep tabs on them."

Blanc folds her arms in front of her, keeping you pinned with her gaze. "I won't have any warning the next time they swing into town and break things. I can't fine them directly, bar them from taking Lowee contracts from /anywhere/, or exert pressure on the Guild to punish them in some way. The most I can do is send a big fat 'wanted' poster to the other nations, but barring big heinous crimes, the other nations don't have much incentive to bother adventurers who may or may not be causing trouble to their rivals."

You chew on this for a moment. So what she's saying is, she basically wants a way to keep track of you.

(Cont.)

>>35514635
Blanc closes her eyes, not quite nodding her head. "I want some way of knowing that you won't cause trouble. Even aside from my own feelings on the matter, things will go more smoothly for you in other nations if you have the Guild backing you up, making sure you're legit. I also don't want you to break Ester's trust in you. She has enough to deal with as it is."

Ester finally speaks up, looking uncomfortable. "H-Hey, Blanc..." When she doesn't get an answer, she sighs and turns to you. "Well. If it helps, you'll still be able to be a freelancer, and take only the quests you want to take! And, uh, you'll get your pay instantaneously this way. Like, legendarily instantaneously!"

You find yourself pinned by White Heart and Ester's stares as they wait for your answer. You... you honestly hadn't thought this far ahead, regarding the International Guild. Then again, you never really had a classical education in this sort of thing. Yours was more of a hard-knock life, growing up.

[ ] [REFUSE] Sorry, but you can't let yourself be tied down. You need all the time you can get to deal with some personal issues of your own, and you won't be in big cities all that much anyway.
[ ] [ACCEPT] Eh, why not. Without Guild membership, you might have trouble accomplishing your goals if everyone's as suspicious of you as Blanc clearly is.
[ ] [WRITE-IN]

>>35514652
>[ x] [REFUSE] Sorry, but you can't let yourself be tied down. You need all the time you can get to deal with some personal issues of your own, and you won't be in big cities all that much anyway.

>>35514458
>not haggling life giving booze in addition to your pay

You disappoint me.

>>35514652
>[ ] [ACCEPT] Eh, why not. Without Guild membership, you might have trouble accomplishing your goals if everyone's as suspicious of you as Blanc clearly is.
ok ok fine
its not like we are planning on being outlaws anyways
inb4 we get framed for something major

>>35514652
>[ ] [REFUSE] Sorry, but you can't let yourself be tied down. You need all the time you can get to deal with some personal issues of your own, and you won't be in big cities all that much anyway

>>35514652
>[X][ACCEPT]
We have a party, now. This makes sense.

>>35514652
>[x] [REFUSE] Sorry, but you can't let yourself be tied down. You need all the time you can get to deal with some personal issues of your own, and you won't be in big cities all that much anyway.

>>35514652
>[ ] [WRITE-IN]
Yeah, but what happens if I can't meet the quota? Or what happens if I want to leave the guild? I'm not all that keen on people knowing where I am at all times either.

>>35514652
Hmm. I'm having trouble with this one.

What ARE our goals, anyway?

>>35514652
>[ ] [WRITE-IN]

Ask the important question, can it get us better beer?

>[ ] [ACCEPT] Eh, why not. Without Guild membership, you might have trouble accomplishing your goals if everyone's as suspicious of you as Blanc clearly is.

Accept anyways, Ester seems hyper but she is easy to get along with. and can be trusted in a fight.

>>35512983
Just got here. And we're past this issue now. I'd just like to say how very disappointed I am that anyone even CONSIDERED throwing away our precious alcohol.

>>35514652
>[COUNTER-OFFER] I will require a daily stipend of booze.

>>35514718
>Get a beard

>Fix (most of) our bugs

>Build a fortress

>>35514687
but anon, pay IS getting booze
every dwarf knows that money is backed by beer. exchangeable at every tavern.
when you sell someone an axe for 70 silver you are selling him it for 28 beers without the need to actually carry the beer with you (where it is at risk of spillage or being tainted).
this is the entire basis of the dorfitalist economic policy

>>35514652
>[X] [INTROSPECTION]
What the hell are our issues, anyways? If being in the guild is going to affect them, we should know what they are.

>>35514652
>[ ] [ACCEPT]

>>35514766
I guess that we're incomplete. That's probably never seen in this world, and we don't know how most games would react to it.

>>35514652
>[ ] [REFUSE]

>>35514652
Okay... BUT I DEMAND A BEARD

>>35514718
>>35514766
>Keep voting, this is just for clarification:
>[X] INTROSPECTION

Well, you kind of have trouble putting your goals in any sort of order, but you really would like a fortress. It's not only because you want a place to put up your feet without paying for a room or anything like that- fortress-building is in your blood. It's more than half of what you ARE, and what your purpose in life is. Apparently, though, fortress-building isn't as easy in Gamindustri as it would be elsewhere, and you've got a few kinks to work out of your system before you can build one. You just have to figure out what you need. Dungeon-delving for more 'parts' is a start.

The second goal you have is... well. You're looking for someone important to you, and important to your past. The problem is, you literally cannot remember a goddamn thing about them- their name, their appearance, nothing. All you remember is screaming, blood, laughter, and a grin wide enough to devour the hopes and dreams of heroes. You're well aware that that's not a lot to go on.

The third goal is to go visit Mojang in Leanbox, but that's more of a short-term thing that's easily done anyway.

>>35514652
>[ ] [ACCEPT] Eh, why not. Without Guild membership, you might have trouble accomplishing your goals if everyone's as suspicious of you as Blanc clearly is.

>>35514652
> [x] [ACCEPT]

>>35514884
Huh, we'll have an easier time in a guild, then. Their quest requirement seems pretty low, so we'll still have some free time.

>[X] ACCEPT

>>35514884
Hmm. Okay then, sounds like being in a guild could be helpful. Let's accept.

>>35514652
>[X ] [ACCEPT]

>>35514884
We should inform Blanc and Estee about our long term goals and have like a quid pro quo arrangement with them. We join and help them and they help us get land and look for said person.

>>35514884
guild sounds like will help with those actually.

>>35514652
>[ ] [ACCEPT]
>BUT drop the monthly quota for us as a gesture of good-will.

>>35514958
No. Just no. Why would we tell a random stranger and a slightly closer stranger all our life goals? We're a dwarf.

>>35514884
>[x] Accept.

We won't be building fortresses without some sort of support here. Maybe we can even make our natural inclination towards chaos and glitching and FAILURE IS FUN! work for us and build fortress/training dungeon/deathtrap combos.

Pretty much what we would build anyways, but we could also charge admission to hero's.

>>35514958
I sincerely think we should not mention it to them. I have suspicions the person we're looking for is not regarded highly in this society.

>>35514998
Eh. I don't think you understand how LEGENDARY! Hero's work. Ester is bro-for-life tier with us now. We're party members, yo, and she's already rather estranged from Blanc lately. At most, since we literally have no information to give them about this person, it's pretty much "par for course" in that regard.

I mean, and no offense to Blorp, but "Looking for mysteeeeeerious figure from our selectively amnesiac past" isn't exactly a brand new thing to console RPGs.

I think we should totes get a promise to help us with future fortress building though. From Blanc, not Ester.

>>35514884
What game devours the hopes and dreams of all who play it, replacing them with a hollow black shell of pain?

I mean besides Dwarf Fortress.

>>35515125
I Wanna Be The Guy?

>>35515083
Yeah, that's fine.

But telling BLANC about it, right after talk about freelancers needing watching and such, just, might be bad.

>>35515125
The Sims?

>>35515125
QWOP

>>35515141
But we can't really tell her anything about it, aside from "Hey, I need the freedom to get this shit done, can you assure me of that?"

Seriously, all we have to go on is "Mysterious figure" that we need to find and figure out what to do with.

>>35515125
Chapter Master.

Oh, dear god, let us run into CM-Tan.

>>35515252
I don't think Blanc can assure anyone of anything.

The Guild sounds like an independent party that works with all the Goddesses, not something Blanc has control over.

Basically, we have to rely on Ester helping us take care of quests, which she can do, and helping us find Rogue, who is probably some criminal overlord terrorizing the lands with their empire of freelancers roguelikes.

>>35515309
>Rogue

FUCK how did I not think of that.

>>35515125

American version of 7th Saga.

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>>35514652
>[X] ACCEPT

After a moment's consideration, you relent with a nod, feeling your braids bobbing with the motion. Fine. You'll join. Just so long as you aren't hamstrung by the quota of quests, alright?

Some of the tension leaks out of Blanc's posture, and she relaxes back to the cool, professional young girl you met in the Basilicom earlier. Ester is not nearly as restrained.

"Great! That's great!" the Dragon Warrior chortles, picking you up by the armpits and swinging you around. "Don't worry, leave everything- oof- to your big sis, and I'll- oof- make sure you're settling in just- oof- fine!"

... you give up trying to kick Ester, and end up dangling from her arms like some sort of oversized cat. Maybe that's what Ester is: she's a crazy cat lady, except she tries to collect little sisters instead of murderous fast-breeding felines. You ignore Ester for the moment and look to Blanc, firing off a few questions and doing your best to ignore her little amused smile.

"Payment in beer and quest quotas, huh." Blanc shakes her head. "Well, I'm afraid that you'll have to take that up with the Guild office in Lowee. Still... I'm glad you agreed, Urist. Thank you for that, and for your delivery."

Yeah, she's probably going to have to go deal with immense property damage to Lowee's streets, the piles of dead giant flies, and the frightened, huddled crowd of tourists inside the Basilicom. In the meantime, is there anything else you want to ask Blanc (and/or Ester) about?

[ ] [FORTRESS] Ask Blanc what it might take to build a fortress in Gamindustri... zoning permits? Something to tweak your abilities? Are there any precedents?
[ ] [MYSTERIOUS STRANGER] Ask Blanc and/or Ester if they know anything about, uh, this person you know nothing about. Prepare for embarrassment as they tell you how fucking cliche that is, seriously.
[ ] [MOBAs] What else does Blanc know about those two assholes?
[ ] [WRITE-IN]

>>35515360
OH AND OF COURSE
[ ] [NOPE] Ask nothing. We good here.

>>35515360
>[ ] [FORTRESS] Ask Blanc what it might take to build a fortress in Gamindustri... zoning permits? Something to tweak your abilities? Are there any precedents?
>[ ] [2CAT] What would it take to adopt a couple of cats around here?

>>35515378
>[ ] [NOPE] Ask nothing. We good here.

>>35515360
>[X][FORTRESS]
Who cares about mysterious pasts? We get enough booze we'll remember what we lost to that booze-inspired blackout.

What we need is information moving forward.

>>35515389
>adopt a cat
>ADOPT A CAT

Are you fucking insane?

>>35515389
>[ ] [2CAT] What would it take to adopt a couple of cats around here?
We am I reading

>>35515360
>[ ] [FORTRESS] Ask Blanc what it might take to build a fortress in Gamindustri... zoning permits? Something to tweak your abilities? Are there any precedents?

Permits, lots of fucking permits likely. Before we get a true fortress, we need a good brewery.

>[ ] [WRITE-IN]
Any other long lost friends we know of, but have lost track of? Not the one we have no idea where to start. Should be quite a few here.

>>35515360
[ ] [FORTRESS] Ask Blanc what it might take to build a fortress in Gamindustri... zoning permits? Something to tweak your abilities? Are there any precedents?

>>35515360
>[ ] [FORTRESS]
>[ ] [MOBAs]

>>35515422
*Wtf
Damn you phone learn some acronyms

>>35515360
>[x] [FORTRESS] Ask Blanc what it might take to build a fortress in Gamindustri... zoning permits? Something to tweak your abilities? Are there any precedents?

It's the purpose for us joining anyway.

>>35515360
>[ ] [FORTRESS] Ask Blanc what it might take to build a fortress in Gamindustri... zoning permits? Something to tweak your abilities? Are there any precedents?

>>35515389
Look, we have a catgirl we could make a member of the party.

But unless she has stats for brewing booze of defeated enemies I don't care for it.

>>35515389
Well, we already have one cat. Whenever we remember to pull her out.

>>35515463
Our dwarfu gets a catgirl and a catboy near her. How fast will the population increase?

>>35515360
>[FORTRESS]

Fortress?
Fortress.

For-TRESS?!
FOR-FUKIN'-TRESS!!

>>35515493
>Urist Twelfthbay has admired a fine +catgirl leather trousers+ lately.

>>35515360
>[X] [FORTRESS] Ask Blanc what it might take to build a fortress in Gamindustri... zoning permits? Something to tweak your abilities? Are there any precedents?
Who better to ask about building our murdercavern than someone in power? Having their blessing can only help the process, too.

>>35515360
if she is willing to answer those questions, then ask them all. the more answers we get the better.
ask in the following order (in case she cuts us off after X questions)

>[ ] [MYSTERIOUS STRANGER] Ask Blanc and/or Ester if they know anything about, uh, this person you know nothing about. Prepare for embarrassment as they tell you how fucking cliche that is, seriously.

>[ ] [FORTRESS] Ask Blanc what it might take to build a fortress in Gamindustri... zoning permits? Something to tweak your abilities? Are there any precedents?

>[ ] [MOBAs] What else does Blanc know about those two assholes?

>>35515360
>Prepare for embarrassment as they tell you how fucking cliche that is, seriously.

Sorry I had to say that, man. It is what it is. If it makes you feel better, the rest of the quest is . . . very original. Or insane. Why not both?

>>35515360
Fortress definitely, ask if they have any info on the fly-guy following us (that I will ask Mr. Shadowruns "Don't tell Blanc anything!" to avoid whining about since she ALREADY knows all about him), and find out where we can get [BEER]. Seriously, we're running on fumes.

>>35515691
>ask if they have any info on the fly-guy following us (that I will ask Mr. Shadowruns "Don't tell Blanc anything!" to avoid whining about since she ALREADY knows all about him)

BUT HOW DOES SHE KNOW ABOUT HIM?

>>35515656
Haha, it's cool! I didn't mean it like that- it IS true that it's overused, especially in RPGs, so that would've figured in their reactions, too.

Like you said, it is what it is, and I'm perfectly fine with people telling me when something doesn't work/is weird!

>>35515691
Good question. You'd think any bugs would be taken down my Lowee's QA defenses.

Maybe we could get a quest to find out how they got in?

If I had to guess, a how in the fabric of spacetime cause my quantum stack-. . . Oh.

>>35515789
Because she was there while he was screaming to the world about tracking us down and making us not remember?

She then asked us how fucking retarded we were for training him to her city?

Finally, she IS a goddess. She's prolly seen this trope a thousand times before. Well, a couple dozen at least.

>Lying to gods/goddesses

It's like you WANT us to end up on a mountain with an Eagle eating our liver every morning or something.

...Wait, are the giant flies old bugs that were patched in Urist's past

>>35515360
>[X] [FORTRESS] by a landslide!

... well, you don't really want to keep Blanc from her duties, so you decide to keep it simple. You lead into the question by noting that you're more of the building type, really. So speaking hypothetically, what would one need to build stuff around here?

You were half afraid that Blanc was going to reject you out of hand, or act like you've grown another head, but the goddess actually nods knowingly. "Oh, I see. That shouldn't be too much of a problem, depending on how much space you need."

You name a number- the smallest sized fortress you can reasonably create. Her answer is instantaneous.

"That's far too big. But that still shouldn't be a problem. You'll just need to find some tool that'll let you reduce the size of your site. Maybe another that lets you take advantage of Gamindustri's unique characteristics. After that, of course, you'll just need a zoning permit. That's the most mundane requirement, really."

You nod your assent, committing this to memory. Some sort of tool related to embarkation, and maybe a... memory device? That's the sort of stuff you can probably find in dungeons, anyway. You're about to give her your thanks, but you notice Blanc's forehead furrowed in thought.

(Cont.)

>>35515890
>Because she was there while he was screaming to the world about tracking us down and making us not remember?

Oh yeah, wasn't that right before she killed him?

Before he could tell us anything about our past?

Interesting coincidence, that.

>>35515924
"Someone else asked the exact same question you did, not too long ago," the goddess says carefully. "She was an odd person- a cosplayer of some sort, with minions. And she would add numbers to the end of her sentences every now and then, like-"

You interrupt her. Like... 'years of peace have strengthened our relations (+2)'? That sort of thing?

Blanc nods. "Exactly. You know of her?"

... sunnovabitch, Maia's still alive and kicking in Gamindustri. Who would've thought? The last time you saw her, she'd built up a death stack of soldiers, put on her Montewhatsits mask, and marched off to terrorize some poor bastards who were trying to give her shit for being a city-builder who relies on armies to fight her battles for her.

"I can't say I'm surprised. Birds of a feather flock together, and all that. She joined the Guild recently, too, so you might be able to get in contact with her that way. Now, if you'll excuse me..." The goddess nods to you and makes her way back into the Basilicom; a few moments later, you can hear her barking out commands, probably to the priests. And maybe the tourists.

You're still dangling in Ester's arms. Can... can she put you down, now?

"Nope. We're going straight to the Guild to get you registered!" Ester hoists you back up, draping you over one shoulder like a slaughtered pig, tensing up like she's preparing to sprint the whole fucking way there. "Get ready for ADVENTURE, little sis!"

What!? N-No, she REALLY has to put you down, you can walk just fine on your own, and uwaaaaaAAAAAAAGH-

[TO BE CONTINUED NEXT THREAD]

>>35515948

Ah, Civ-tan.

What leader would you choose to be a basis for the girl?

>>35515948
This Maia, sounds like a good person to have a spot of tea with a very cultured and civilised individual indeed.

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Alright, it's a weeknight, so this's a good time (and probably place) for a wrap!

Next thread's going to be this Thursday, 10/16, at 7 pm EST! (And I'll be out of town over the weekend, so the thread after that will be a bit delayed). Updates and schedule will be at https://twitter.com/BlorpQuest , and feel free to ask questions in this thread or at ask.fm/BlorpQuest and I'll do my best to get to 'em.

Thanks for participating, you guys, and I hope you enjoyed the thread!

>>35515948
Civ? Oh god.

>>35516014
Thanks for running!

>>35516004
ALL OF THEM.

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>>35516004
Who do you think.

>>35516016
Just one more thread...

>>35516010

Probably has a whole collection of masks in her bag.

Last thing you want her to do is break out her modding kit.

Fall From Heaven 2 summons, magic and troops?

>>35516069
Mods, especially big game-changing ones, would count as ultra-high level dungeon drops.

It's entirely within the realm of possibility, depending on where the quest goes!

>>35516052
>our fortress will get nuked if we won't stop her
How do we approach that?

>>35516049
> put on her Montewhatsits mask


Like Hexadecimal from Re-boot, she has an array of masks that she puts on to deal with specific people/situations, but really the drive to conquer and control is the same beneath them all.

>>35516120
Orbital magma cannon

>>35516107

Well, since she does show up on consoles in different era's, it makes perfect sense for her to be here however.

Civ 4 had some really awesome mods, 5 less so, but 4 allowed a lot more play in gmae mechanics.

I just want us to eventually find another base builder, X-Com-tan.

Blorp, a question.

Will Steam be in this like a second in command for somebody or a merc leader or something?

>>35515948
dawww

>>35516263
That's... a really good question, actually! We're getting a lot of characters, so I'll have to think about that.

>>35516263
if it helps
steam is currently building a PC which is gonna be a pseudoconsole (so, xbox 1?) based on what they call "steam OS". which is a linux derivative.
they have been working on it for more than a year and are close to release.

>>35516815
oh, and in their announce steam explicitly says this is a retaliation against microsoft and windows 8 with its walled garden approach and app store.

>>35516815
I hope that turns out to be a Wizard of Oz style deal, given that Steam OS isn't really a console. Just Gabe Newell's face in a cloud of steam saying "Uh, nope. It's just me, Gabe Newell."