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(Massive text dump incoming, apologies)
The Cursed Ways? Succumb to darkness? Sounds like a bunch of nonsense to you. To call magic cursed when it comes from the font that is Surya's heart, well. How can a gift from the gods themselves be cursed? “What do you mean 'those who followed the Cursed Ways'?”

The scrawny gentleman straightens himself up to his full height, although compared to either you or Darzi he's still rather tiny. Like a child, really. He straightens out his clothes and clears his throat, as if preparing to give a speech. “I hail from the Aleamondian Empire, the most advanced polity in all the world. I should know, I've traveled all across the map in search of a worthy ally to my great homeland.”

Ugh, gods above. If this is going to be the trend the entire time you're going to need to leave. “Sadly I've found that only my homeland of Aleamond have realized the dangers that magic poses to the world. It was the downfall of the Rhynian Empire, and the Hiacian as well!” You raise an eyebrow, listening just a touch closer. “Recall your people's stories of their Earth god, killed long ago by the rest of your pantheon!” Well, that's not right. You let it slide regardless. “Your people tried to bring him back, succeeded even! Then at the sight of the world you'd made in his absence he destroyed the heartland of your empire, turned it into a blasted hellscape.”

He shakes his head, tsking softly. “Yet still your people pursue this foolishness of magic, seeking to place themselves in the roles of gods. It is pride that is your sin, and the sin of all the world. Pride and envy. Man's realm lies here, on this Earth. We ought focus on understanding its natural wonders. Not dabbling in the power to change the universe. Why, if you could merely see Aleamond and the wonders we've produced, you'd see magic isn't necessary to live comfortably.”

(1/8)

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He leans towards you, a nostalgic smile on his face. “Why, in Aleamond every city has lights and running water like your Vatis district does. Hot water too! Every home, from the richest of the rich to the poorest of the poor, can afford to keep their homes warm even in the coldest months without a fire! No magic involved!”

You shake your head slowly. “That is all well and good, my friend, but do not think technology devoid of risk. I have seen your promised land, I have traveled across its blighted wasteland and diseased forest. Technology will one day release horrors on this world far worse than anything magic is capable of.” He seems confused, off balance. You imagine he's not used to that response. Anger, assuredly. You imagine he's had quite the time here in El-Amin. That sort of talk will get a foreigner clubbed over the head in some parts of town. Which reminds you...

“What's a human doing in the Noble's district anyway? I've hardly seen a human outside the market or the docks my whole life in El-Amin. Honestly, you're in a spot of danger this far into the city.” You state it as a fact, not as any sort of veiled threat. You're a touch concerned for the man, truth be known. It would be an awful thing to be healed of a cold only to be beaten to death by hoodlums.

He smiles broadly. “Right! I'm one of the few humans allowed this far into the city. I'm a envoy from the Emperor of Aleamond to Padishah Kadir, Fourth of his Name, Rule of Pidjata.” Gods, that's awful presumptuous. Last you checked the shahdom only really controlled half of Pidjata, perhaps less. Perhaps he intends to rectify that? Kadir is awfully spoiled, and terribly envious. However, he's most certainly not a great military ruler and you'd hate for the man you hate most in the world to become the first Shahanshah of a united Pidjata.

(2/8)

1st for banished

You shake your head to banish the thought. “Well, good luck to you then. Mister-” He draws himself up once more. “Casimiro Maria Buenaventura Espino, Fourth of my Name! Proud to make your acquaintance-” Gods, why so many names? Four others share that horrendous nonsense? “Mikhael Abdul-Hakim. A pleasure. Well, I really must be on my way.”

Your excuses made, you quickly set off once more for your parent's estate. An interesting man, or at the very least strange. Very excitable fellow, he seemed. Darzi voices her thoughts as the two of you wander along the wide laned cobblestone rodes of the nobles district. “What a nice man. I do hope he doesn't meet an misfortune on the road.”

You shrug your shoulders. Muggers are a fact of life every foreigner, and indeed many natives, had to live with in El-Amin. It was just one of the many reasons they had the City Guard, though no guard force no matter how well trained could put a stop to all crime. Eventually the two of you arrive before the stately residence of the main branch of the Abdul-Hakim tribe. Two guards in lamellar armor stand to either side of the great stone archway which leads up to the main entrance, a thick wooden gate keeping out the riff-raff. A lone tower stretches skyward from the rear of the building, marking the family's private shrine.

As you approach, the guards lower their spears to block your course. You smile charmingly to each. “What's this? Don't you recognize the prodigal son come to visit?”

One of the guards takes a good look at you, a good long look, and shakes his head. The other speaks. “Not a clue who you are, y'ain't Salil, that's for certain. He's already inside.”
(3/8)

>>36686092
my body is ready.

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You can't help but scowl. Salil was the man who married your betrothed in your stead after you were sent off to become an apprentice. Ironic, that in the act of saving her you lost her. You suppose that is the way of the world. “Does the name Mikhael ring any bells? I understand it's difficult for the common sort to recall what happened any more than a few minutes in the past, but I'm asking you to try your hardest. For me. For your betters.”

One of the guards bristles. “I oughtta run you through for that comment, little bastard-” His friend holds out an arm to stop the man from jabbing you with the tip of his glorified kebab skewer. “Hold on a second, Mikhael... you know Mikhael. Sankar's banished son what slandered the Shah and got banished for it.”

You grin a sadistic grin. “Right! See, I knew you could do it. That's the sort of faith I have in Abdul-Hakim guardsmen. Now open the gates and quit wasting my time.”

The lippy one looks like he might raise issue, but relents and steps aside while his companion unlocks the gates and swings them open. You and Darzi step through, and the gates are shut firmly behind you. Darzi nudges you in the arm with her elbow. “Did you really have to be so rude? They're just doing their job.”

You shake your head in disgust. “I'm gone a handful of weeks, just a handful! They've already forgotten me! This visit was a mistake. Watch, we'll get inside and my own mother won't even know who I am until I remind-” As you sweep through two marble pillars into an elegant open-air colonnade the doorman, a white-bearded Samjan who's served at least the last six generations of your family to your knowledge, opens the door and announces in a voice which bellies his age. “Mikhael Abdul-Hakim, Former Vatis in the Shah's Own Service, Aghtaki and Second Son of Emir Sankar.”

(4/8)

Wish i hadn't read the pastebin. This would be that much more fun to read just before I go to bed.

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You clap the doorman companionably on the shoulder. “Thank you, Atif. At least someone remembers me. Gods, you'd think I'd be infamous.” The old Samja merely bows his head and swings his arm towards the door, motioning you inside. You oblige him, and find yourself greeted shortly by your mother rounding a corner which leads further into the manse. “My boy's home!” She squeals excitedly, throwing her arms wide.

You greet her with a hug, though to be frank it almost feels like she's trying to choke the life out of you. “Do you know how much I've missed you? It's been a month, and the only word from that madman your father apprenticed you to!” She pushes you away to get a good look at you. “You've lost weight! Have you been eating properly out there in the waste? We'll have the cooks make you your favorite. Slow roasted chicken with dates, and baklava for dessert!”

Gods it's good to be home, even if your mother is a worrywart. Much as you'd rather not admit it, you missed being fussed over.

She pulls you down for another tight hug, planting kisses on each cheek. She only notices Darzi once she's finally released you. Darzi, for her part, is still standing somewhat uncomfortably at the doorway. She doesn't quite seem to know what to do with herself, save fiddle with the hem of her new shawl.

Your mother exclaims excitedly “Oh and you brought a girl home! A well bred girl, judging by the look of her! You've got your father's eye for women, I see.” She quickly crosses the foyer to take Darzi by the wrist and drag her further inside. “Well don't stand there like some sort of idiot, girl! Are you deaf and dumb? I'd like to at least learn your name! Oh, you'll just have to have-”
(5/8)

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Your elder brother, Zaahir, appears in one of the doorways leading further into your family's estate. He's tall, even taller than you are, and wiry. You'd say that he's slightly more muscular than you are, but no longer is there any great difference. Before you began your wanderings you were a soft, pudgy youth with little in the way of muscle tone. Since you've begun traveling you've become lean, and hardened. You'd even fancy yourself rather attractive.

He wears a set of gorgeous red and orange silk robes, the colors layered just so, with your family's insignia, that of a broken pair of black manacles set above a golden crown, dyed on the back. Geometric designs run up and down the sleeves and decorate the folds of the robe. Resting on his hip is a long saber, a weapon you know from experience he's quite adept with, and fashioned across his chest is a brace of daggers. It's fairly standard ceremonial garb, typically warn by the heirs of powerful noble houses at social functions. You're forced to wonder why it is he's wearing it now.

Your brother grins widely at the sight of you. “Mik! It's been ages! How long since we last saw one another? It must have been at my wedding two years ago, you really don't visit frequently enough.” He clasp your forearm tightly and you return the gesture, a sign of your camaraderie. “I see you doing well for yourself! You'll need to tell me of your travels. Gods! I can't believe it's actually you. I can't believe you've the testes to show your face in El-Amin after what happened!”

You hold up your hand.”Please, Zaahir. I'll explain all in good time. Suffice to say I've no need to fear the guards any longer. Where is father and his other wives? Our sisters? Salil?”

(6/7 or 8)

Your mother interjects. “Semiha's eldest is pitching some business proposition to your father, he needs a loan to send some big fleet of silks and spices to Aleamond or some such distant land of simpletons who'll pay out the nose for such things. Sure to grow the family's coffers, but I hardly know why he'd need your father's funds for such a thing. They're in the foyer. The lesser wives, some of your siblings, and I were just about to open a bottle and play stones in the peristyle.” Your mother, as both the oldest and favorite wife, is the head of the household and tends to lord that status over your step-mothers.

Silence grows in the room. Your brother seems captivated by Darzi, who looks to you pleadingly. As if asking you to rescue her from your dear mother, or perhaps to merely correct the mistake she seems to have made in regard to Darzi's identity. Your mother glares at your older brother, hand still firmly latched to Darzi's wrist. She seems dead determined to drag along your 'mistress' for a friendly interrogation over wine and games. Eventually your mother blurts out. “Quit gaping about like a damn fool, Zaahir. Gods above, open your mouth much wider you're liable to catch a fly.”

Your brother had not been gaping, not truly, though he does seem quite impressed by Darzi's looks. Who can blame him? The woman's gorgeous. Not exactly appropriate, given the circumstances, but then again it seldom ever is. Zaahir clears his throat uncomfortable and nudges you in the shoulder with his elbow. “We've a number of our clients and allies in attendance today, we're hosting a dinner party later this evening. Salil's meeting with our venerable father, but I've no doubt he wishes to see you. You remember where his study is? I'm sure he couldn't get mad at you were you to stride in unannounced, though it may be best to wait. Pompous ass though our-”
(7/8)

Your mother cuts him off with a glare. Honestly, you don't remember where your father's study is. It's a large estate and it's been years since you had any reason to visit your father's study. Usually when you've visited he was lecturing one of your brothers about tariffs, taxes, or trade in the peristyle or in the courtyard. That is, after all, how your family earned their fortune. The Merchant Lords of El-Amin as the common folk have dubbed your family.

Come to think of it, you saw quite a few of your family's retainers in the Shah's army at the Temple. You wonder, absentmindedly, if any of your family's ships were in the Shah's fleet sunk on the coast by those pirates. If they were, your family is likely in somewhat dire financial straights, though you've seen no indication of such. They're hosting a feast, an expensive proposition no matter how small the list of attendees.

>Correct your mother regarding Darzi's identity.
>Leave her to make her assumptions, if only for your own amusement.
>Write-in

>Ask your brother to lead you to your father's study, you need to speak with the man urgently.
>Join your mother, sisters, and father's other wives for drink, games, and presumably snacks.
>Carouse with your family's clients and allies, some of the most powerful people in the Shahdom.
>Write-in

Hah told you fuckers that his family didn't hate him.

>>36686370
>Correct your mother regarding Darzi's identity.
Can't we make it sounds like ambigous enough to let the doubt plane or something, then set it straight.
>Join your mother, sisters, and father's other wives for drink, games, and presumably snacks.

>>36686370
>Correct your mother regarding Darzi's identity.
It's not appropriate and there is no need to piss Darzi off.
>Join your mother, sisters, and father's other wives for drink, games, and presumably snacks.
Fun and family.

>>36686370
>Correct your mother regarding Darzi's identity.
>Join your mother, sisters, and father's other wives for drink, games, and presumably snacks.

>>36686370
>>Correct your mother regarding Darzi's identity.
Tell her that she siad we are a bit crazy for her taste, but she is a good freind
>>Join your mother, sisters, and father's other wives for drink, games, and presumably snacks.

>>36686370
>The Merchant Lords of El-Amin
To think people didn't want to be Jews, when our family is the definition of Jews.

>>36686370
>Correct your mother regarding Darzi's identity. and then
>Ask your brother to lead you to your father's study, you need to speak with the man urgently

>>36686491
>>36686449
Second, I would like darzi to be our second wife.

>Correct mother
>Free booze and snacks.

>>36686506
We will become a Jew greater than the Jews, a Big Jew

>>36686561
You can never say no to free booze and snacks.

>>36686370
>>Correct your mother regarding Darzi's identity.
>>Join your mother, sisters, and father's other wives for drink, games, and presumably snacks.
No carousing with strangers until we're officially unbanished.

>>36686581
The Alpha Jew

>>36686370
>Correct your mother regarding Darzi's identity.
>Ask your brother to lead you to your father's study, you need to speak with the man urgently.

>>36686561
Man our families history is awesome.
>>36686581
Considering we are descendants of slaves and know the true value of money, we shall be the biggest jews.

>>36686370
>Correct your mother regarding Darzi's identity.
>Join your mother, sisters, and father's other wives for drink, games, and presumably snacks.

>>36686581
We will be the Dark Jew

>>36686620
DARTH FINKLESTEIN

>>36686628
>Not Darth Shekelus
Nigga do you even?

You have three brothers, one of which is older than you. As the eldest male your older brother has been groomed for the life of a Pidjatan noble; primarily taught letters, sums, and how to command the respect of others. You were close with your older Brother, he is only two years your senior and you spent a lot of time together before you became an apprentice. He was even sad to see you banished, despite the damage you'd caused the family reputation. You can't say the same of your younger brothers.

The older of the two is three years your junior and was happy to see you named a Vatis because it meant he got to marry your betrothed. He was even happier to see you banished because it meant you were disqualified from any sort of inheritance. He was always kind of a conniving asshole, and from what you'd heard he had entered the Merchant's trade shortly before you were banished.

>>36686684
You barely even know your youngest brother. He is fifteen years your junior and when you were banished he hadn't even entered puberty. From what you understand he's being groomed for an ecclesiastical career, and was due to be shipped off to the local shrine dedicated to Pani.

You had five sisters, two older than you and three younger. Your oldest sister was eight years your senior and and played a large part in raising you, your other older sister, and your older brother. Unfortunately, she was married to a nobleman in the city of Marqash and left your household when you were still a child. She wrote home regularly, but after you began to live under your Master's roof you couldn't be bothered to keep up with the goings on of her life.

The younger of your two elder sisters is only four years your senior, and she often attempted to tag along with you and your older brother whenever the two of you set out to cause trouble; much to your lament. She was something of a tomboy, and to your understanding remains such to this day. Last you heard she'd attained the rank of Captain in the El-Amin City Guard.

Of your three younger sisters, you only know one well. The other two are six and ten years your junior, when you were apprenticed to your Master one was an annoying, somewhat dimwitted child and the other was still elated that she'd recently mastered talking.
The eldest of the three is only three years your junior and had always looked up to you and your brother as hero figures, to be admired and emulated. This tendency only grew stronger after you were shipped off to be an apprentice. She proclaimed shortly after that she wanted to be an all-powerful, all-conquering Vatis just like you when she grew up. Unfortunately, your relationship spoiled after you were banished as it meant the end of her betrothal to one of the Shah's sons.

>>36686353
> he needs a loan to send some big fleet of silks and spices to Aleamond
>Pompous ass though our-”
So the betrothed-stealer (and "Glad to see you banished") is out of his luck and he's not the favorite brother, interesting. Let's see what he has to say to us before we give him money.

>>36686721
>>36686709
>>36686684
Direct Family:
Parents:
(72) Sankar Abdul-Hakim: Father. A kind and loving father. He always looked out for the family before himself.
(57) Hafsah Abdul-Hakim: Mother. Your father's first and favorite wife. Absolutely coddled you.

Siblings:
(34) Safiyyah Abdul-Hakim: Eldest Sister. Played a large part in raising you and your siblings. Married to a noble in Marqash.
(30) Halima Abdul-Hakim: Older Sister. A bit of a tomboy, always tagged along with you and your brother. Captain of the Guard.
(28) Zaahir Abdul-Hakim: Older Brother. Your closest childhood friend, you did everything together. Your father's heir.
(23) Azra Abdul-Hakim: Younger Sister. Almost worshiped you and your brother as heroes, until you were banished.

Family:
Step-Mothers:
(41) Semiha Abdul-Hakim: Father's second wife. A beautiful, if dimwitted woman. Very doting. Has always treated you well.
(33) Nadiyya Abdul-Hakim: A distant and cold woman, but unbelievably shrewd. Taught you everything you know about haggling.
(26) Ayda Abdul-Hakim: Father's fourth wife. The last scion of a once wealthy and noble family. Married for her wealth.

Half-Siblings:
(23) Salil Abdul-Hakim: Younger Brother. Glad to see you banished. Married to your former fiancee. Successful merchant.
(20) Pratima Abdul-Hakim: Younger Sister. Not particularly well known.
(16) Duha Abdul-Hakim: Youngest Sister. Not particularly well known.
(11) Chetan Abdul-Hakim: Youngest Brother. Not particularly well known. Priest dedicated to Pani in El-Amin.

Seems sorta like Soma has arranged our direct family against our half-siblings.

>>36686782
>>36686709
>>36686684
http://pastebin.com/7vJJG4Pa

>>36686709
I hope our youngest brother goes to the temple we were just at, the name escapes me atm, and he hears of our amazing exploits. Also, $10 says that the oldest young sister tries to sneak along with us when we leave.

>>36686721
>>before we give him money.
HAHAHAHAHAHA like that filthy cunt is getting a single fucking shekel of ours.

>>36686834
>Prof I like you, come over to my house and fuck my sisters.png

>>36686832
http://pastebin.com/PiCeiCyj

>>36686849
Well, if his endeavours offer 50% profit...

>>36686834
Nah she is still serving her first term.

>>36686370
>Correct your mother regarding Darzi's identity.
Darzi best girl though
>Join your mother, sisters, and father's other wives for drink, games, and presumably snacks.

>>36686782
>>(33) Nadiyya Abdul-Hakim: A distant and cold woman, but unbelievably shrewd. Taught you everything you know about haggling.
This woman is the giga-jew, we must practice haggling with her, if only to show her how much we have progressed our jewery.

>>36686872

Hey, hey, hey! I like Prof and all, but he's still a filthy elf! Don't me wrong. He's good enough to be friends with, just not good enough to fuck one of my sisters. I mean, there's lines you just don't cross!

>>36686916
Honored Step-Mother I think I am close to master rank Jew vatis.
>Soma make us roll some fuck huge DC.
You are ten years to young to call yourself a Master Jew, goyim. How 'bout I teach you some more, for a price of course....

>>36686872
Yeah, even though im 90% sure your not serious I just want to throw out there that it will be a cold, cold, fucking COLD day in hell before we let an elf have relations with our family, friend or not.

>>36686986
That is exactly what I want to happen, except we roll 3 nat 30's and prove we are the chosen jew.

>>36686996
>>36686947
The fantasy racism runs deep, I see.

>>36686947
>>36686996
But Mik's also an elf.

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>>36687049

>>36687049
Shut you're shit encrusted mouth up.
>>36687026
i'm the asshole who fucks with anyone that has an elf

>>36687049
>>/out>
you are banned from participating, reflect on what you did wrong...

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>>36687049
>

>>36687049
Get out heathen.

>>36687049
You just said the wrong words in the wrong neighborhood motherfucker.

>>36687061
>>36687076
>>36687095
>>36687097
>>36687104
>>36687126
I don't get it, he's literally a dark elf. What's the difference?

>Shout Dark Elves in a Samjan city
>Beaten to death by hooligans.

>Call Elves filthy degenerates
>They laugh and go back to fucking animals.

>Call humans bumbling simpletons.
>They invade your lands and conquer vast swathes of territory.

Humans confirmed for best race.

>>36687142
Are you new here?

>>36687142
And you are a chimp, what's the difference?
Is this your first thread?

>>36687153
>They invade your lands and conquer vast swathes of territory.
More like
>they get pissed and run towards big brother for help.

>>36687153
>round ears
>big shit anymore
Ooga booga magic bad!

>>36687153
>Shout Dark Elves in a Samjan city
>Beaten to death by everyone.
FTFY

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>>36687049
Wonder what happens on VoidTV everytime Mik's starts on the "not elf damnit"

>>36687201
>>36687153
>Shout niggers in a black neighborhood
>Shot up by gang members.
Further proof that Samja are niggers.

>>36687175
I suppose it'd be more like Homo Erectus but he obviously must be one of those filthy humies being unable to tell the difference between our glorious master race and the scum that is elves

>>36687215
You've never been in the ghetto, they would stab you to death for breathing. Shouting niggers will only make your death quicker

>35 minutes later
What happened to 20min intervals?

>>36687312
Like anyone expected Soma to keep to that, you cant rush genius.

>>36687251
>>36687215
Neither of you have been in the ghetto, shouting niggah won't do shit other than some loud hecklers.
Whats fun to do is blast anime songs and just drive through those neighborhoods and watch thier confused stairs as your weeb shit is louder than their garbage rap.

>>36687312
Soma doesn't understand mortal time

>>36687312
Time does not constrain the great QM that is known as Soma

>>36687312
Soma is traveling at a speed close to the speed of light.

>>36687342
That's how my brother died.

>>36687312
He's probably adjusting to writing Mik after GM and all these new characters.

>>36687390
Blasting anime songs in the ghetto?

>>36687414
No, getting watched by confused stairs. Merciless things they are.

>>36687312
There's a lot more characters now than before, and Soma's been running a lot for some long ass sessions + RL not being kind.
It's been declining since September.

>>36687390
Fatally ruptured eardrums?

>>36687414
That and the 27 stab wounds to the chest, yeah.

>>36687430
I know, I just miss it.

I'd prefer more meat in the story, I don't need to know what each party member is doing at every moment in time

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>>36687342
>Not blasting DMX mixed with some animu shit.
It still hurts goddamn

>>36687312
Time is different in the void

what do you guys think about the new mad max trailer?

>>36687552
Meh, the setting doesn't seem depressing enough. Feels like they tried too hard.

>>36687449
Did he park the car or something?
They usually just stare or bitch.
>>36687488
Black and yellow+hidamari sketch is the best shit.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=duWTfl4MJ1c

>>36687571
Individually I dislike both of those things but together they are just barely likeable, rare occurrence where two negatives actually equal a positive.

>>36687552
Its obvious that they are trying to appeal to newer audiences, i'm just hoping it isn't pg-13.

>>36687552
It looks kinda cool but I have to agree with >>36687567, it just feels like they were forcing the edginess instead of focusing more of the situation, at least that's the vibe I got from the trailer. I'm still going to go see it because I get a boner from anything post-apocalyptic (especially cars) but I dont expect to much from it beyond some cool explosions, though i'd love to be proven wrong.

>>36687342
Literally all you have to do is step on their kicks

>>36687552
Just watched it. Looks like concentrated bullshit, a just-for-the-money remake: Not gritty at all, vehicles very high-tech instead patched and in disrepair, it's clean with a small dust coat.

>>36687732
It doesn't matter if you do that in the ghetto or not, if you do that anywhere you deserve whatever that follows.

>>36687752
Caring about 150$+ shoes, i still find that bullshit.
The most i ever spent on shows was 90$.

>>36687752
Granted but that is just one of the several specific ways to get yo ass beat in the ghetto or shanked or both

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You clap your shoulder affectionately on the shoulder before moving to follow your mother. “As tempting as the prospects of interrupting our brother's little presentation or entertaining a bunch of strangers seem, I believe I will take up our mother's offer of free booze and, presumably, snacks. After all, I ought to lay low until the announcement is made.”

Your brother raises an eyebrow and opens his mouth to speak, but you cut him off. “As I said, I'll explain in good time. Preferably when there are no prying ears to concern ourselves with.” You cast a glance around the entryhall, but see no one who might be listening in. You'd still rather make the reveal once all the guest have left. It's just safer that way; the last thing you need is to incite Shah Kadir's wrath almost immediately after he unbanished you.

Your brother sighs, shaking his head in mild, if good natured, annoyance. “Gods, Mik. You've always had this flare for the dramatic. I still remember when we were barely this high-” He raises a hand to his abdomen. “-And you challenged a City Guardsman to a duel of honor just because he bumped your shoulder passing by. Thought he was going to beat us silly for the insult, glad we managed to outrun him.”

Ahh, memories. You suppose you always have been a bit ornery, a bit distasteful of authority, now that you think back on it. Even as a young child you used to give your tutors fits because you'd always ask an unending stream of pointless questions. Your attention snaps back to the present as your brother strides back towards the door he entered through. “Well, I must keep our guest entertained in your absence, then. Do try not to burn the house down.”
(1/4 or 5)

>>36687781
To be fair, if you spend $150 on ANYTHING you're gonna care at least a little bit.

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You hold up your hands in mock surrender. “Hey, that was one time!-” Excluding recent ventures. “-And it wasn't even a house! It was a merchant's stall!” Your brother laughs, before vanishing through the doorway. You turn to find your mother giving you an odd, questioning look.

“When did you burn down a merchant's stall?” She ask, completely oblivious. Right, you forgot that she never found out about that. Crap.

“It seems to be a common theme with your son, burning things down that is.” Darzi comments with a sly grin. Damn her, she better not let slip about that bar incident. Actually, that reminds you...

“Oh, and mother. Darzi isn't my mistress, she's just a good friend. Apparently she finds me just a bit too mentally unstable to be relationship material. To be honest, I can't blame her. My travels have taken a tole on my sanity even if I feel they've made me a better man.”

Your mother drops Darzi's wrist and glares at her. “My son's not good enough for you, then? Well, we'll see about that! I'll have you know my son was betrothed to the Shah's cousin before he began his apprenticeship! Who are you, so proud as to consider yourself better than a member of the royal family? Hm?”

As you follow your mother through the hallways, she lecturing Darzi the whole way about your various merits, achievements, and various other good points you can't help but feel a bit proud of yourself. Your mother always has coddled you, just a touch. You missed it. Darzi for her part seems terribly uncomfortable, but really she should've expected this. It's her fault when you get right down to it.

(2/4 or 5)

>>36687800
>>You clap your shoulder affectionately on the shoulder
the good ol' pat on the back.

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Finally you reach a wide seating area, cushions arrayed around a low table where several bottles of good wine sit opened and a board marked with a square grid sits untouched. An array of white and black marbles, one side flattened, lay scattered about the table. Your sisters, your step-mothers, and even a few women you assume to be your brother's wives sit arrayed around the room. There are also a number of small children you don't recall having seen before. Admittedly, it's been quite some time since you saw all the women of your family gathered together.

You recognize Vasuda, your former betrothed, cradling an infant in her lap. She waves her fingers in front of its face, making a variety of senseless noises. It all seems just terribly amusing to the child, you think it's a boy. It waves its hands emphatically in the air, trying to catch hers. It's much, much lighter skinned than Vasuda, you'd almost mistake it for a human were it not for the ears, so you don't think it's hers. You can't help but feel oddly relieved realizing this.

Pratima is adorned in gold and jewels, Semiha's second oldest and your father's fourth daughter. She's just slightly less than seven years your junior, and quite attractive. Oddly she wears the garb of an adventurer, pants and sandals with a wide skirt, a sword on her hip and a strange gem embedded in her hand. She wears a brooch strapped to a leather belt on her chest, and ridiculous bits of leather and bronze you suppose might pass for 'armor' if one was using a particularly liberal definition of the term.

(3/4 or 5)

>>36687849
FFFFFFFFUU-

>>36687800
>And you challenged a City Guardsman to a duel of honor just because he bumped your shoulder passing by
Hah

>>36687800
>You clap your shoulder affectionately on the shoulder
In 8 hours you can put the blame on being tired, but in the second post...

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Duha, your father's fifth daughter and Semiha's second youngest, is wearing some sort of fur trimmed coat and a steel breastplate but otherwise could pass for any common, if particularly well off, woman on the street. She's grown up to be surprisingly attractive, though she has your father's light skin. Rather unflattering, in your opinion. You wonder if she's followed in your elder sister's footsteps and become a guardswoman. It wouldn't wholly surprise you, though you can't say you know her that well.

Duha is speaking animatedly to Pratima, but Pratima seems wholly uninterested in the conversation. Disdainful, even. You thought those two got along pretty well, it's a touch surprising to see them arguing.

Your only full blooded sister in attendance is Azra. You must admit, you still bear a grudge against her for spitting on you as you were dragged through the streets. She sits at the table, sipping a cup of wine and chatting happily enough with Semiha, her mother. You're not sure what they're going on about. Semiha for her part looks beautiful as ever, though you must admit a little out of it. You think she might be a touch drunk.

Nadiyya is resting next to Vasuda, another infant in her lap. Another boy, you think. It sits up, looking over the proceedings sleepily and swaying slowly back and forth. Nadiyya handles it with surprising care, you honestly half expected her to be the sort that drowns their children. Not that you dislike her, she's just not very motherly. Judging by the additional weight she seems to have gained you'd guessed that the children are hers. Gods, has it really been so long since you last saw her? You really should have visited more often.

(4/5)

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Finally, Ayda sits silently at the table next to Azra. Your father's youngest wife, she looks absolutely timid. She's the same age as you are, and she only married your father two or three years ago. You find it a touch strange, she's technically your mother after all, your step-mother at least. She nibbles at the food and sips at her wine, making little progress towards finishing off either.

Your mother claps her hands together twice to get everyone's attention. All eyes turn towards your mother, and then towards you, and finally towards Darzi. Your mother clears her throat daintily before announcing. “My second son has returned from his wanderings, with one of his eternally ungrateful 'friends'! I expect all of you to give them a warm welcome.” She emphasizes the last two words, and you note Azra scowl, gritting her teeth. The room is silent, it seems you're supposed to say something here...

>Just toss out the usual pleasure to be back, missed everybody, et cetera et cetera.
>Boast a bit about the adventurers you've had, the challenges you've faced, and the friends you've met.
>Perform a minor trick just for the fun of it, an illusory sign or some such.
>Write-in

So many characters, god damn. Have to post the rest of the art in the next few post.

>>36687923
Don't worry Soma.
After all, the fall of El-Amin will take care of most of these guys. Eheheh.

>>36687923
>>Boast a bit about the adventurers you've had, the challenges you've faced, and the friends you've met.
>>Perform a minor trick just for the fun of it, an illusory sign or some such.
Lets do a projection.

>>36687923
>Perform a minor trick just for the fun of it, an illusory sign or some such.
How about "UNBANISHED"?

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>>36687869
>We were betrothed to that qt3.14
Our lil' bro's a cunt.
Also, she's light skinned as fuck Soma. Whatchu trynna pull?

>>36687923
>Boast a bit about the adventurers you've had, the challenges you've faced, and the friends you've met.

arrogance is our birthright, as an enchanter and as a proud non-exile

>>36687923
>Boast a bit about the adventurers you've had, the challenges you've faced, and the friends you've met.
>Perform a minor trick just for the fun of it, an illusory sign or some such.

>>36687988
>>36687980
Seconded, how about at the end of our tale it says we are unabanished.

>>36687992
Meh

>>36687923
Let's boast about our adventures. We can impress the family members that still like us and rub our success in our sister's face.

>>36687923
>Boast a bit about the adventurers you've had, the challenges you've faced, and the friends you've met.
>Perform a minor trick just for the fun of it, an illusory sign or some such.
Show off whatever we can.
Ask about Pratima's outfit.

>>36687923
>Perform a minor trick just for the fun of it, an illusory sign or some such.

>>36687992
Have you ever tried to find good, non-porny brown elf art?
It's difficult. I had to make compromises. Really, she should be a few shades darker than the image portrays her.

>>36687923
>Write-in

make a spectacular sign above our heads that says unbanished. make it light up and do all sorts of crazy things for the kids. i can see mik doing that.

>Captha: painedp return

>>36687923
>Perform a minor trick just for the fun of it, an illusory sign or some such.

>>36687988
I like this idea, but we need to do that after we make the reveal. Like "hey, I saved Kadir's life, so he's gonna unbanish me. It's not official yet though, so keep it on the down low until the ceremony happens."

>>36687923

>Just toss out the usual pleasure to be back, missed everybody, et cetera et cetera.

Give Azra a bit of cold shoulder though. If she wants to be a bitch, no reason for us to put up with it.

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>>36687923
>Perform a minor trick just for the fun of it, an illusory sign or some such.
Just reminding you bitches I could kill half of this city without half a thought.

>>36687988
This, but also with fireworks going off around the words as they pulsate in neon.

>>36688040
Photoshop.

Select tool>Variations>Any color NON-ELF Samja you want.

>>36687923
>Just toss out the usual pleasure to be back, missed everybody, et cetera et cetera.

So when do we casually Wop our Wads?

>>36688040

>Have you ever tried to find good, non-porny brown elf art?

Literally fucking impossible It's like 96.2% porn

>>36687923
>Perform a minor trick just for the fun of it, an illusory sign or some such.

MAGIC MIK

>>36687923
>Boast a bit about the adventurers you've had, the challenges you've faced, and the friends you've met.
>Perform a minor trick just for the fun of it, an illusory sign or some such.
Make a big NERD sign over Azra's head.

>>36687869
ex-fiance is too cute

>Doing all of this shit in front of a gaggle of gossiping women.

Whatever we do, at least don't tell them we're a father.

>>36687828
>>36687869
My diiiiiiiick

>>36687923
>>Boast a bit about the adventurers you've had, the challenges you've faced, and the friends you've met.
>>Perform a minor trick just for the fun of it, an illusory sign or some such.

>>36688077
That's a very high thought to death ratio there anon, be careful the Shah could always be listening to our thoughts through the communication brooches.

>>36687988
Save the Unbanished bit for after the guests leave and the whole family is gathered.

>>36688129
Holy shit, we have to tell everyone!

>>36688154
NOOGODAMIT

>>36687923
>>Boast a bit about the adventurers you've had, the challenges you've faced, and the friends you've met.
>>Perform a minor trick just for the fun of it, an illusory sign or some such.

>>36688084
>So when do we casually Wop our Wads?

Why aren't we doing it right now?

Give them like a teaser of cool stuff you have seen like 2-3 secs each of epic battles and crazy shit you seen.A taste til all the family is here so you can tell the whole tale.

>>36688129
Seconded lets tell them about the dragon.

>>36688139
The fuck would he manage that?

>>36687923
>Just toss out the usual pleasure to be back, missed everybody, et cetera et cetera.
>Perform a minor trick just for the fun of it, an illusory sign or some such.
Not the "Unbanished" thing though. There's a better time for that and I don't trust Azra not to fuck this up somehow.

>>36687923
>Boast a bit about the adventurers you've had, the challenges you've faced, and the friends you've met.
>Perform a minor trick just for the fun of it, an illusory sign or some such.

Make a list of our accomplishment above our head:
UNBANISHED
GRANDMASTER
SAVED THE SHAH
A FATHER

And a sign over Azra's head saying "LOSER"

>>36688167
We should just walk around the room and have gold spilling from our cloak and pretend to not notice, then when someone points it out; "Oh that? Yeah that's just my PHAT STACKS!" before using manipulate to turn all the gold into a chair to sit on.

>Boast a bit
>ILLUSIONS
Writin'
Since you already said (in character) you'd like to wait a bit until the guest have left, it wouldn't quite make sense to go and display UNBANISHED in big flashing neon lights. You will hint at such though.

>>36688071
>Give Azra a bit of cold shoulder though
Well, she spit on us because our banishment meant she wouldn't find a good husband. That's selfish but a bit understandable. As soon as she hears about unbanishment, she will be glad to have us back.

>>36688182
YES!

But wait with the father stuff.

>>36688234
At least announce our grandmastery and becoming a father.
Also mock Azra.

>>36688167
>>36688233
Just whip off our cape and have ricky push it all out in a giant stream.

>I created tabletop gaming and named it Siege! It is a huge success, you probably haven't heard of it.
>HypsterMik.

>>36688234
No rolls?

>>36688234
Sounds good. See you in two hours. (accounting for the imminent downtime, obviously)

>>36688234
Can we hint with a giant flashing neon sign? Thats the best way to give a hint,

>>36688233
this guy gets it soma

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>>36688268
Nah, nah. Illusions like the ones you'll use a pretty simple for a Master Fire Vatis.

>>36688272
>Downtime
You're joking, right?

>>36688272
Anon that sounds suspiciously like a complaint, but I know better than to think that people would complain about Soma.

>>36688322
>You're joking, right?
4chan maintenance generally doesn't joke around.

>Mom I'm a father.
>Wat? you mean you will be a father? How sad your children will be born out of wedlock yadayadyada.
>Actualy mom, he was born a few weeks ago, his name is Zahak.
>WAT how can you already have a son while you've been banished less than 2 months ago.
>Magic, I ain't gonna explain shit; mother.

Tough I'd rather not speak of Zahak yet.

>>36688348
Is it like a nightly thing these days? I admit, I haven't been on as much as I usually am. Had to make a presentation about the Book of Hours of Joanna the Mad.

>>36688365
Alright, this has been confusing me a bit.

Is it Zahak or Zahhak? Is it pronounced Zauh-Haak or Zaah-Ahk?

>>36688409
Yes

>>36688409
I just called him zed in my head.

>>36688380
It's often enough that it seems like it. Damn it stop responding to me and write that filthy post you slut.

>>36688409
>Zahak Abdul-Hakim:
>Mikhael's adoptive son, a dragon hatched from an egg he found deep within the Mines of Longia, separate from the rest of the mother's brood. Only recently born.

>>36688428
I think they just had to fix something up and it took them several days. Supposedly it was caused by moot deleting that Usaka thread.

>>36688428
>> Not getting giddy everything Soma responds to you.
Do you even like Banished Quest?

>>36688409
>>36688453
I go with Za-Haak myself

>>36688483
Same here.

>>36688475
I just get all my Soma fill before the threads, anon. Sorry you're so jel-ley-ous

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Ayoo Anons

Am about to to go on a grand adventure to do glorious battle with the best dragon ever but I don't know what class to pick.

Should I go full magic or assassin?

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Don't care what we do as long as we constantly fuck with Azra.

>>36688518
Wrong thread?
And you keep your hands off our dragon!

What are you assholes listening to tonight?

>>36688518
>Trust me, I'm a Samjan.
>Zahak trying to bullshit his way out of a situation.
this picture made me laugh for some reason.

How about we show off our fortune. Fine silks and gems stones for our mother and sisters.

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>>36688555
Mozart ;_;

>>36688518
>>36688553
Shit oops

>>36688518
What ever rocks your boat, once i hit level 200 i had maxed out all classes, but if you want to be optimal go to the dragons dogma thread on /vg/.

>>36688517
You can never have enough Soma, silly anon.

>>36688518

Go assassin and backstab the dragon with a dagger! Auto kill!

>>36688581
>implying that's not why I'll never leave

I made a thing
http://sketchtoy.com/63880800

What does banished quest do between soma updates?

>>36688555
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nLmsVBgZiak&list=LL16aqqDT3OwrWmXDc5-Lm2w&index=15

>>36688567
Not yet. We have to learn how the family (and worst brother) is faring first.

>>36688555
http://youtu.be/CaBBBmrxUvE

Recently fell in love with this

>>36688517
Stop flaunting the things we cannot have, Soma-imouto.

>>36688607
I usually read Light novels or watch youtube videos.

>>36688607
Shit post, unless there is an Important decision to make, then we just shit post and argue.

>>36688553
Eh it's fine Dragons Dogma is /tg/ approved... I think.

Anyways
Grigori > Any Dragon

>>36688555
Dota streams and Andrew Jackson Jihad.

>>36688674
Zahak>Grigori>Any Dragon.

>>36688620

Best bro should get something nice from the get go. The Elaudian Axe comes to mind.

>>36688555
shanghai restoration project

>>36688715
...Nah, I wanna look more closely at that thing. For reasons.

>>36688607
ArtAnon posts porn

Anons shit post and argue

Soma tippity taps and Yarps

Did I miss anything?

>>36688792
Yeah forgot 'bout Moot being a gaylord and crash the sites trying to updates things

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>>36688792
ur waifu a shit you were right on point

>>36688741

Its been sitting there for fuck who knows how many threads!

>>36688827
Source?

>>36688853
It's a chain axe calling it now

>>36688853
49, including parts and semi-threads. I'd just like to keep anything Elaudian on us for the inevitable trip. And for its study.

>>36688864
The hobbit movie behind scenes documentary, I believe.

>>36688380
Hey Soma what do you think of a clock work orange?
Would you include a character like that in this setting or in the scifi setting?
whats you're opinion on the true ending?

>>36688827
>that pic
Why has nobody done this before??

>>36688903
Harry potter did it.

>>36688903
I did but homebrew settings don't get a lot of media exposure.

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How many days until Birthday Skeleton?

You fold your arms in front of your chest, blowing out a long, contemplative sigh. “Gods, let me tell you. It's been a long month... month and a half I suppose. Let's see here...” You expend just a touch of vys, using it to conjure a vast illusory canvas above your head. It seems to stretch skyward, obscuring much of the doorway and the wall behind you. Figures paint themselves into existence, dancing across the field in the midst of battle. A vast fire appears in the center, which they clash around.

“I've raided ruins, fought pitched battles, killed men, and accomplished much.” The illusion above you is wiped clean in an instant, replaced by the towering city of Anthus as you recall it, which is itself quickly replaced by the entrance to the Academy of Anthus. “I've discovered vast fortunes-” The image shifts to a massive pile of gold coins. “-and artifacts of terrible power.”

To demonstrate, you draw your cloak wide and push your hand passed the event horizon of its interior. You feel a hilt pressed into your palm and when you whip your hand free you wield in your hand the Hiacian Saber you recovered from the vault in Fort Longia. You give it a flourish, and then press it back into your cloak. Judging by the gasp and the absolutely mystified looks of your family you're doing a good job of telling your story.

The image displayed above you is wiped away, replaced by the futuristic hellscape you wandered through for weeks. “I've traveled to impossible lands and seen things which violate nature in ways magic can only dream.” The image shifts, to the skeletal image of those three skeletal observers which seem to haunt your life. “Communed with strange beings beyond mortal comprehension.”

(1/2 or 3)

Finally the image displays your party, gathered together in front of the quite literal sand castle you all built together on the shores of the temple. Darzi laughs off to your side. “And I've met a number of even stranger men and women I'm proud to call my friends.”

Finally the image fades away and the light returns. You hadn't realized you'd dimmed it. “Not to mention, I've become quite wealthy and a sight more powerful than I was when I left. I'm a Grandmaster now, and intend to test for the robes soon.”

Your mother swats you on the back of the head lightly. “Mikhael Abdul-Hakim! How could you run about risking your life like it's of hardly any value?! Do you know what I'd do if I found out you'd been swallowed up by some hideous monster out in the waste? I'd be heart broken! Never should a mother outlive her sons!”

You smile, rubbing the back of your head and feeling just a touch guilty. You do put up some meager defense. “Well, mother. It has turned out for the best.”

She scoffs. “For the best! By your own admission you're half mad. Now sit down and pour yourself a glass of wine, I think you've earned one after all the trouble you've gotten yourself into, and out of.”

Darzi joins you as you make your way to the cushions surrounding the table. You note Vasuda follows you the whole way, the baby finally managing to catch her fingers and tug them into his mouth to gnaw on. Seems he must be teething. You ignore her, for now. Instead sitting down next to Semiha and grabbing a cup.

(2/3)

Semiha smiles to you broadly, snatching up a bottle of wine and pouring you a full glass, perhaps a little too full if there is such a thing. “Seems you've had quite the adventure, Mik! You know, my Pratima has turned into quite the little adventurer as well. You know, just last week she delved an old Hiacian ruin to the east and came back with those fancy hand things of hers.” She raises her hand, palm out, and gestures to the point where the jewels seem to have connected to Pratima's hands.

Azra, rather than glaring at you from across the table, is staring just slightly mystified. Like at any moment you might reveal some great cosmic truth. While you certainly could, you're not sure you want to. You don't think she deserves it for the way she turned on you in your time of need.

The din of conversation slowly returns to the room, and as you gulp down a bit of wine you feel a light tap on your shoulder. Turning around, you find Pratima and Duha standing behind you. The former has the biggest grin you can recall her ever wearing, where as the latter frowns down at you disappointingly. Pratima steals a seat at one end of the table while Duha pulls over a cushion and sits down next to her.

“I never took you for the adventuring sort, Mikhael. The arrogant sort certainly, and perhaps the reckless sort, but not the adventuring sort. You know, I've been pursuing that career myself-”

Duha interjects. “It's not a career, Pratima! It's a death sentence! Just because our brother has managed to avoid the fates of so many other adventurers doesn't mean you will too!”
(3/4)

Pratima waves her off absentmindedly. “Ignore her, she's just rankled that she can't keep up with the other guards in training. Really, she shouldn't have signed up. She's not cut out for it. Anyway, do you have any advice for someone like me? A novice?”

To be honest, you never really got to know Pratima. She seemed a kind enough sort, though you wouldn't have thought her the adventuring sort. She seemed meek and mild tempered. Quite the turn around from the last time you saw her, years ago.

>Find a solid group of compatriots to watch your back.
>Don't trust anyone. They're all out to stab you in the back.
>Don't do it. It's as Duha said, a death trap. It's a miracle you've lived this long.
>Write-in

>>36688983
>>Find a solid group of compatriots to watch your back.
But really
>Don't do it. It's as Duha said, a death trap. It's a miracle you've lived this long.

>>36688983
>Find a solid group of compatriots to watch your back.
>Git gud

>>36689001
This
"I was very very lucky I was a Water Vatis"

>>36688983
>Find a solid group of compatriots to watch your back.
And get good at water magic. It's the only reason we haven't been horribly injured and/or killed.

>>36688983
>GIT FUCKIN GUD

Srsly tho I'd either tell her to do this or not do it

>>36688983
>Write-in
Become extremely competent in water magic, specifically healing

>>36689024
This

>>36688983
>Find a solid group of compatriots to watch your back.
>Write-in
GIT GUD, but also do as i say and not as i do.

>>36688983
>Don't do it. It's as Duha said, a death trap. It's a miracle you've lived this long.

Yeah nah chill out mang

>>36688983
>>Find a solid group of compatriots to watch your back.
"When you think you're good enough to handle anything, you may have enough of a shot to kill a few baby crags. Even with a good group, if you can't watch your own back you're as good as dead."

>>36688983
>Find a solid group of compatriots to watch your back.
>Don't do it. It's as Duha said, a death trap. It's a miracle you've lived this long.
Better master water magic if you want to live just a week adventuring.

>>36688983
>Write-in
"Frankly, I've died like 10 times already. If you're really set on adventuring, get a bunch of suckers to watch your back and do everything for you. Also, be better at things than everyone else."

Healing ftw.

That is all.

>>36688983
>>Find a solid group of compatriots to watch your back.
Try to find people that can cover yours and each others weakness, being able to think fast on their feet is alway recommanded. Magic is always helpfull.
And never put on ominous masks of a dead god or something stupid like that.

>>36688983
>>Don't do it. It's as Duha said, a death trap. It's a miracle you've lived this long.
combination of this and, if she can't be swayed,
>>Find a solid group of compatriots to watch your back.

>>36689024
>>36689028
>>36689054
Oh yes, yes, yes

>>36688983
>Find a solid group of compatriots to watch your back.
>Warn that there are times you will encounter things beyond yourself. Recognize when you have reached such a point and react as best you can. Rythian ruins hold great secrets, but approaching those secrets in ignorance can get you sucked off your feet and obliterated in a heartbeat. Surround yourself with those of sound courage and loyalty but whose opinions often differ from yours. Listen to their input and keep the safety of yourself and your band in mind even if you should choose to discard it. Never be satisfied with your current abilities if you are to risk the life of yourself and others in the pursuit of glory or riches. Also learn when to relax and take it easy.

>>36688983
Learn water magic or hang out with someone who already did.

>>36688983
Explain how literally everyone would have died at several points had we not been a master water vatis, and even then it was kinda sketchy.

>>36688983
>write-in
Avoid the void
Learn water magic, it'll keep you alive

>Find a solid group of compatriots to watch your back.

>>36688983
>Write-in

If you insist on doing I suppose I can only give you some advise. Find a solid group of people who you trust but first and foremost, either become a water Vatis or have one of your companions be one and be a very good one at that. However if i'm honest I wouldn't recommend it the only reason i'm still alive is because of those two reasons and even then they were very close calls.

>>36688983
>Find a solid group of compatriots to watch your back.
>Write-In: Get good at water magic, haggling, and stealth. If you see dragons, golems, constructs, void entities, or spirits, fucking run.

>>36688983

>Find a solid group of compatriots to watch your back.

Without my friends I would have died more times then I can count. Find people that you can count on in any situation, and they'll be more valuable then any trick I could ever teach you.

>>36689102
>>Avoid the void
Lol yeah, explain how its not wise to float into the heart of Surya.

>>36688983
>Write-in
Avoid the void
Don't get jewed by spirits
Learn some healing
Git Gud skrub

>>36689113
>golems, constructs.
Those are small time shit. Every adventurer should know how to deal with them.

The others though avoid like the plague

Some good advice, some good advice. I think I'll start writing but feel free to keep posting write-ins if you'd like.

>>36688983
>Find a solid group of compatriots to watch your back.
Get a water vatis.

>>36688628
Muh Dick

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>>36689001
Y'all niggahs forget something important.
HAGGLE LIKE an Abdul-Hakim

>>36688983
Just so you know, i've been on the verge of death about half a dozen times. It's not something i'd recommend to somebody with options.

Get some proper armor damnit

>>36688983
"Learn manipulate and poison so you don't have to slit your own throat if something toxic gets in your body"
"If you see vys that looks weird or CORRUPTED somehow, leave the area, never go back, nothing there is worth it except a dragon child, but you can't rely on getting one"
"Avoid the void or portals to/through the void. If you step partway through a strange portal and see namek on the other side, back out. It isn't worth going through there"

>>36688983
>Write-in
"Adventuring I've found is far too risky for a single person. In all of my serious ruin delving there have been situations which if I'd not had the help of powerful and trustworthy companions I'd be one of those unfortunates you hear about, and that is despite being a perfectly capable healer myself.
Another thing about adventures I've come to know is that the essence of risk versus reward tends to skew itself towards greater and grander methods, and one such reward had us all pitted against a man who, for all I had seen, been entirely unable to die through some well and truly wicked means. I believe that is also the fate of an adventurer who trusts artifacts too easily, as I've encountered dangerous things of the like myself.
All the dangerous stuff aside, if you're too stubborn to listen to the common sense of a mad man, you absolutely must have a healer on hand who doesn't shy away from serious trauma, one who would readily slit their own throat open to save themselves from poison, for instance.
The most general tip I can give you from my experience is that the deeper you delve into a ruin the harsher it gets, the closer you get to places people haven't seen for ages, and sights that would rather do all they can to ensure they're unseen.
Also, do not trust spirits, and if you must deal with them be very specific even if it annoys them. They'll always try to get the most out of you."

>>36688983

>Find a solid group of compatriots to watch your back.
>Write-in

Lets give her the true

Its far safer if you others who you can trust, but by no means give your trust blindly. Its a life full of cold nights, deadly dangers and close encounters with death (in more than one way...). I have been lucky. Extremely lucky. And I should be dead more times than I can count were it not for my friends, my wits and a lot of luck. Some adventures die without a chance to see what kill then or any reward for their troubles.

>>36688983
get some gold and find sadik

>>36689089

>And never put on ominous masks of a dead god or something stupid like that.

Something else we should probably mention. ... Just because. Not that we'd ever do that ourselves!

>>36689166
A merchant named Sadik is one of the most powerful Vatis I know. You can trust him.

>>36689205
Seconded don't be too trusting.

>>36689187
I think you forgot that we come from the jews, if someone in our household doesn't already know how to haggle at this point in their lives then they aren't a real Abdul-Hakim and will die days into adventuring.

>>36688983
Mention Sadik and the acedmy, for tips and shit.
Also teach her battle mediation.

>>36688922
about two weeks, it should be 24 or 25 Bandali today

Can we teach our two sisters Battle mediation?
Also can we improve battle mediation with the void shit we learned?

>>36689205
>>36689252
>>36689199
Seconding.

Especially with the thing about ruins getting harder with depth.

Like, if a ruin seems like its getting too much, just retreat. While our own party got a hell of a lot (and 2 new members) from those mines the trouble was truly of a level that it seemed we only made it out by Pani's favor.

>>36689199

True. Another good point to remember. Always, always be careful in how you word your bargains with spirits!

>>36689198
Don't go to Namek, you'll spend 14 threads there.

>>36689252
Sadik is like a safe house for adventurers.

>>36689340
Not as many as the temple.

>>36689252
>You can trust him... but not his prices!

>>36689166
Can we try this as well?
>>36689315
I would like to teach them this since it would help greatly in both their endeavors.also i want real battle medation.

>>36689282
>Also teach her battle mediation.
If we start teaching anybody anything, it will be group teaching with all our party. They have to git gud as well. E.g. we're the only one who knows any effect. Only Darzi and we know battle meditation.

>>36689354
The temple was full of progress, Namek was full of very bad stuff.

>>36689392
>If we start teaching anybody anything, it will be group teaching with all our party.
They have to first learn our peoples fighting style, so it would be faster and easier to teach our sisters.

So how much of this Advice are WE going to take?

>>36689392
I liked the bar scene. Mik's first encounter with modern weaponry was hilarious.
>dat grenade

>>36689420
Do as i say, and not as i do.

>Also teach her battle mediation.
>write in
Advance yourself in magic, perferably water first. It WILL save your life. Get better armor, that shit won't cut it.

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>>36688040
Did a quick edit.

>>36689421
>>36689392
We also found out that modern weapons are shit compared to enchanted weapons.
I still think we should dissemble the gun once we get the new one from sadik, to see what enchantments it has.

>>36689420
As a GM, dealing with void shit is a given, but the rest of the advice we do follow.

>>36689435
Instead of telling her to get armor tell her to get something enchanted or something rhynian.
As far as we've seen all the really good stuff in ruins is unreachable without magical protection up the wazoo.

>>36689411

Please. Like Chys wouldn't pick up any fighting style in like 10 minutes. The rest I'll give you, but 10 shekels says Chys would be able to do just fine.

>>36689420
None of it of course. Mik has the handicap/advantage of a million screaming neckbeards as his Jiminy Cricket. Even if a few of use learned those lessons if the others don't neither will Mik. Such is the curse of a being a Quest protagonist.

>>36689439
too blue, samjan are brown

>>36689439
Still pretty meh

>>36689420
420blazeitfaggot. But seriously, Mik is to crazy to take his own advice, I bet as he is listing off things not to do he'll realize that he has done every one of them and come to the conclusion that he is like a crash-test dummy for the gods.

>>36689484
Dark elves are blue though.

>>36689439
Would marry for ten thousand years.

>>36689484
Shut your mouth. She's HEALTHILY blue. Mai blueberry.

>>36689439
Nice try anon, but now it just looks like she's been working in the coal mines.

>>36689472
So you admit that it would be faster to teach our sisters.
Also Chrys will need darzi help in learning since Darzi is better than us.

>>36689480
I bet if we encountered a situation that was exactly the same as the mask or bar situation, we would make the right choice, if only because even the most retarded players will have to see that one option is bad and one option is good.

>>36689493
The star of VoidTV

>>36689520
That is the ideal situation, yes.

>>36689503
WE'RE NOT A FUCKING ELF WE'RE SAMJAN GOD DAMMIT! I DONT CARE WHAT PREFIX YOU USE, DONT YOU DARE TRY AND LABEL US AS AN ELF!

>>36689520
>bar situation
The bar situation was mostly because of dice, and forgetting that they drink gasoline.i still find it funny that people who were bitter almost had us not spend on it, and that shit would have made things even worse

>>36689515

Nope. 20 shekels says Chys would actually learn faster then our sisters. Haven't you learned yet anon? When it comes to combat ability, nothing beets a Chys!

>>36689520
Oh sweet innocent Anon, your ignorance is cute.

>>36689556
>Think were superior to everything
>Arrogant as fuck
>Knife/Pointed Ears
>Good at magic

Sorry to break it to you Jim but...

>>36689598
Darzi whoops chrys all the time though.

>>36689626

In physical combat? Without her super armor? Name one time.

>>36689626
The only time Darzi beat Chrys in anything was in Siege!, and in man oogles. Get ur facts straite.

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>>36689484
Brown enough for ya?

>>36689624
We dont think we're superior to everything, just elves and humans.

>>36689669
Actually chrys beat darzi in Seige

>>36689669
>>36689667
Some one asked soma a while back who is better, and he said Darzi.

>>36689677
MEH

>>36689694
Darzi is better but chrys would break all her bones.

>>36689669
Anon, im pretty sure Chrys won with that cheap floating unit tactic.

>>36689677
Yes

Darzi
Max Vys: 23
Expert Rank Fire Vatis
Expert Rank Water Vatis
Vatis Rank Earth Vatis

Special Abilities:
Masterful Warrior: She is a match for most anyone in hand to hand and melee combat.

Chrys
Max Vys: 20
Expert Rank Earth Vatis

Special Abilities:
-Impossibly Strong: Capable of incredible feats of strength. The upper limit of what she can do is unknown.

>>36689677
Much better anon, +1.

>>36689821
Vatis water for chrys
That got cutoff by accident.

>>36689677
Let me show ya how its 'dun.

>>36689821

Yea, I don't think anyone's arguing about who's better in magic. Darzi has that no problem. When it comes to raw physical combat ability though, I'm put my money on Chys any day.

>>36689821
Why are the women of our party so much more competent than the men, excluding us?

Does Soma have an Amazon fetish?

>>36689867
I don't see it.

>>36689907
Darzi's technique is better though.

>>36689920
skull kid is great
s'only prof that's a fuck up

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>>36689677
>>36689922
Man, fuck captcha. Anyways, THIS is how you turn boring.jpug into Waifu Tier QTOAY.notyours scrub.

>>36689920
Because weak waifus a shit

>>36689907
Darzi's Masterful Warrior, makes it sound like she is experienced enough to stop Chrys strength.
Than again we can skip all this speculation and ask either of them who has the most wins.

>>36689920
Soma is a fetish anon!

>>36689920
SK is probably a beast in combat. We haven't had him along in a real scrap since we've returned from Namek. Prof is just lacking his shield man, he's gud honest!

We shouldn't be too hard on the guy though. He's not living a life where he needs to be da bes at fighting things or anything.

>>36689920
Good thing Darzi is second wife materiel.

>>36689945
... I dont know what that's supposed to be. Anon, if Soma has to stop drinking before posting it's only fair you do too.

>>36689920

Skull Kid is kind of unknown in combat right now, and honestly more of a tech dude here. As for Prof... He's Prof. He's never going to be as good as the rest until he starts getting serious. He's still stronger then the average pud, cause we've been pushing him, so even our weakest is pretty good. In other words, it's not a man/woman thing, it's a Prof thing, and Prof ain't too bad.

>>36689980
It's our betrothed during Rickys possession phase, before he breaks free into the world. She's really just a carrier who'll be a husk at some point, so I can understand what you mean.

>>36690036
My WAT has only intensified with your explanation.

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>>36689945
Looks like Jeice from the Ginyu Force in Dragon Ball Z

Should we tell our sister to fuck the fear turkey?

>>36689937

I'm admit that Darzi might have more training under her belt, but Chys has a lot more raw talent.

>>36690101
If you have to tell someone to fuck the fear turkey, they are not ready to fuck the fear turkey.

You gulp down another mouthful of wine, then set down your cup. “You ask a lot from me, Pratima. A lot indeed. I do not think I could fit all the advice I can give you into one short lecture. If I was forced to try, it would condense to this: Don't go adventuring. If you have any other options, any other options at all. Do not go adventuring. Were it not for the skills of my companions and my own talents as a Water vatis I would have died more than a dozen times over. In fact, I have died...”

You think back on it. Was it just the once, or was it more than once? “Well, once certainly. Maybe twice. My memory is a little indistinct even on such salient matters as my own death. Strange, what having your soul torn at by a parasite can do to a man.” You grin, you like to think it's charming but your sisters seem quite put off by it. Perhaps it's the subject matter?

“In terms of actual, useful advice for one dead set on the adventurer's life-” A pause, while you contemplate. “Find a good band of companions. As I've already said, they've saved my life numerous times. Watch out for the health and continued existence of you and your band above all else. Choose your companions carefully, make sure they're courageous and loyal, but do not surround yourself with vapid sycophants. Differing opinions are good. Just make sure they're not the sort to spit on you when you most need their support.” You cast a glance towards Azra, noticing a flash of annoyance at your dig, but she doesn't speak up. A shame.

You cast a glance Darzi's direction, she seems quite pleased with your comment, judging by her grin. She speaks up during a lull to comment. “Do as he says, not as he does. Believe me, if he followed half of his own advice our chances of not being catastrophically wounded would skyrocket.”

(1/4)

>>36690101

We are not there yet. Its not like we sent threatening letters to the high priest of pani on regular basis.

You sigh. “Yes, yes. I admit to my own hypocrisy.” You wave a hand dismissively. “As I was saying... let's see here-” You pluck up your cup and down another swallow of wine, setting it back down after a moment. “Right, got it. Approach every ruin as if what you might find inside will kill you. None are safe, and a collapsing support will kill you just as readily as a twisted Rhynian experiment. As will some of the devices that they used to power their facilities. I saw an entire band of adventurers obliterated in an instance because they weren't careful and approached an old generator ignorant of its function and abilities.”

“That reminds me, get some halfway decent armor. Not this crap-” You gesture to the scale mail bodice and flamboyant pants she wears. “-you're wearing now. Something solid, sturdy, and preferably enchanted. In my experience you can't get to any of the really good finds without extensive protection from magic. To attempt to do so is usually a death sentence.”

You pick up your glass again, swirling the dark red wine within for a moment before kicking back the cup and finishing it off. It's a sweet read, unspiced but still quite good. Very heavy, and very alcoholic. “Become a Water Vatis. That's another reason I'm still alive. If you cannot become a Water Vatis, find a Water Vatis and recruit them into your party. Make sure they're good at what they do, and not at all squeamish.” You grin as you recall the strange plant beast you faced in the Mines of Longia. “The sort who would slit their own throat ear to ear just to remove some poison coursing through their bloodstream.”

(2/4)

You hold out a hand and start counting off on your fingers. “Don't negotiate with spirits, and if you do be very, very careful. Don't leave anything to chance, because spirits will dick you over at the first opportunity. Don't try to reach the deepest, darkest depths of some untouched ruin just because it's likely to contain the best loot. The deeper you go, the bigger challenges you'll face. While this isn't always the case, it usually is. If you seem to be facing challenges too difficult for your party, retreat. Don't mess with the void. Just, don't. It's not worth it. Trust me. If you do, keep contact very limited. Don't step into strange portals.”

You run over what you've said. Gods, you've been talking for a lot longer than you'd originally anticipated. You've gathered quite a little crowd of listeners. “Finally, and this is the best advice I can possibly give you besides find good friends who will watch your back... get good. Always strive to improve yourself. Your equipment. Your friend's equipment. Never stop learning, and never stop training.”

You nod, satisfied with the advice you've given. Duha speaks up once you seem finished. “Told you it's a bad idea to go adventuring.”

Pratima is all smiles. “Are you kidding me? It sounds wonderful! I'm going to need to start working to improve my magical talents, and my sword play! I'll need to find some companions as well... Gods! So much to do, so much to do.” She shakes her head, cupping her chin in her hands and staring off into space, apparently quite lost in thought.

(3/4)

Semiha shifts uncomfortably next to you. “I don't know, Pratima. It sounds dangerous. I don't like the idea of you running about getting hurt. Exploring old buildings is fine, but fighting monsters... you know I might be able to get your father to arrange you an advantageous marriage, despite our current predicament.” She smiles to you apologetically, before turning her attention back to Pratima. Unfortunately for her, Pratima merely waves her off.

“Arrogant, and reckless. I can see the family resemblance.” Darzi certainly is bold tonight. Insulting you and your family while in the middle of your estate. Fortunately nobody seems to have taken it poorly. At one point, that comment might have angered you. Now, it seems insignificant. She owes you her life several times over, after all. Even if she doesn't show it, you're confident that she's rather fond of you, if only as a friend.

You're scarfing down a slice of fine aged sausage when your elder brother, Zaahir, sweeps through the door. “Salil has finished speaking with our father, Mikhael. If you'd like, you may see him in his office.” Your brother shrugs. “The dinner will be beginning soon as well, and you'll see him then. Honestly I think he just really wants to see you but won't outright say it. Appearances to keep up, and all that.”

>Go see your father, even if you'll need to be careful with what you say.
>No, it's best to wait until after dinner when you can make your announcement to the whole family.
>Write-in

>>36690210
>Go see your father, even if you'll need to be careful with what you say.

>>36690210
On the one hand, I want to invite Pratima to join our adventuring party, but on the other hand, we have too many party members right now.

>>36690210
>Go see your father, even if you'll need to be careful with what you say.

>>36690210
>Go see your father, even if you'll need to be careful with what you say.

>>36690210
>Go see your father, even if you'll need to be careful with what you say.

It's only proper to great the patriarch of the household, especially if that patriarch is your father.

>>36690262
Nah, I don't think the party needs another Mik.

>>36690210
>Go see your father, even if you'll need to be careful with what you say.
Offer to teach both our little sisters battle mediation.