>>37979198
>>STAND YOUR GROUND
WE DON'T HAVE THESE LAWS FOR NOTHIN

>>37979198

>Sliiiide behind Arizona

>>37979198
>>STAND YOUR GROUND

>>37979198
>>STAND YOUR GROUND

USS Oklahoma when? She wants to fight too!

>>37979198
>>STAND YOUR GROUND

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>>37979300
When she gets called.

>>37979198
> STAND YOUR GROUND

>>37979198
>STAND YOUR GROUND
CASTLE DOCTRINE! MY OFFICE MY CASTLE! OPEN FIRE!

>>37979198
>>STAND YOUR GROUND
Like Belgium!

>>37979198
Planefag hey planefag, have they broken out all of the batshit nuclear torpedos/missiles/cannon shells because abbysals?

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>>37979198
>STAND YOUR GROUND

If Kongou does her Teitoku Air Glomp, I'll be expecting the might of our resolve to have her bouncing off of us like bullets off of an AT field.

>>37979198
>STAND YOUR GROUND

>>37979198
>>STAND YOUR GROUND
we are in CHARGE damnit!

>>37979198
>ignore whatever happens next while poking around the room

is cat-like curiosity time? :3

>>37979338
Why does she remind me of that indian princess from Peter Pan?

>>37979431
mmmmmaaaaabe

Calling it for "STAND YOUR GROUND." While I'm writing, please suggest what's good right now for a new phone/phablet, because I've had my fucking fill of this S3 and Samsung's toilet-licking-tier fucking software support.

>>37979577

trip pls

>>37979577
I guess that pos is also why your name is dropped again or are you shitposting on /k/ once more?

>>37979577
Get an OyPhone.

>>37979568
Because she has a feather and is carrying a tomahawk?

>>37979577
Trip dropped

>>37979577
LG G3, like I told you when you asked in the channel pranefrag

Best phablet you can buy

>>37979608
Not /k/, but it is always shitposting

Where's the whiny /a/ fags so we can mock them endlessly?

>>37979676

LOOKS LIKE A FALSE-FLAG POSTER

SIC'EM

>>37979686
planefag you're not even on my level

you know who I am

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>>37979577
I have a Galaxy S5 and its fantastic.

>>37979707
nigga why you makin me drink more tho

this drinking game is going to kill us all

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This shit is gonna be lulz

>>37979198
>“Adm. Goto Hitoshi”
For a minute, I was hoping for Goto Kiichi, same name as the guy from patlabor. He was an interesting trollish guy

>>37979757
Google Admiral Goto

>>37979757
Goto jail. Donut pass go. Do not marry 200 shipsluts.

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>>37979577
>thug lyfe Iowa slinging 11" katie shells

>>37979782
The one who died during WWII?

we will not be cowed by a puny shipslut's rampant insanity!

>>37979987
>Sunk ships come back as shipsluts
>Sunk admirals come back as admiralsluts

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The words have hardly slipped from Goto's lips when thundering footsteps sound in the hallway outside; the headlong charge of someone barreling towards the door with terrifying momentum. Cane be damned, you turn and face the doorway square (as Goto's chair sinks out of sight with a muted hiss,) bracing your broad shoulders to receive the charge head-on, whatever horrors the headfucked-reanmiated-ghost-spirit-JESUS-CHRIST-THEY'RE-REALLY-GHOST-SPIRITS-CAN-THEY-SMELL-FEAR-FUCKFUCKFUCKFU-

- the door fairly explodes open, slamming into the wall hard enough to make every picture frame on it rattle alarmingly. The barely-visible blur of pale skin and paler cloth charges right for you and -

- “YIP!”

- *bounces* right-fucking-over you like springheeled goddamn jack, as you look up and twist to follow her amazing leap as she somersaults right over you, clearing the back of the edge by inches and landing square in Goto's lap.

At least until her momentum is fully transferred, and the chair goes flying over backwards. Then she's sitting on his belly, her hands planted on his shoulders, beaming down at him.

“Are you playing hard to get, Admiral?”

“Fuh,” he replies; his face slack with shock.

>Applaud
>Rescue
>Abide

>>37980064
>>Applaud

Damn. That requires applause.

>>37980064
> Applaud

>>37980064
>Applaud

"That was a fine jump. Nine out of ten."

>>37980064
>>Applaud
That was pretty damn impressive

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>>37980064
>Applaud
Sasuga, Kongou-san.

>>37980064
>Applaud
Great Jump, 8 out of 10.

>>37980064
>>Applaud
we enjoy our counterparts discomfort

>>37980117

Why is her head-thangy drawn differently sometimes? Sometimes with those cut-outs on top, and sometimes without. Annoying!

>>37980064
>>Applaud

Burning love in action.

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>>37980140
Just different artists.

Use the official offical ones if you want.

>>37980064
>>Applaud

Order Arizona to clap too.

>>37980140
Why isn't your name in all caps?

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>>37980140
Her head gear changes for Kai Ni to what is in the picture you posted.

>>37980064
>Abide

>>37980064
>>Applaud
WELL DONE, LASS.

>>37980064

>Applaud

>>37980189
You can see the art here: http://kancolle.wikia.com/wiki/Kongou

>>37980189
>for Kai Ni

the fuck is that; modernization?

>>37980247
Yes.

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>>37980247
Yes.

>>37980247
Also know as upgrade, modernization, type 2

>>37980064
>>Applaud

>>37980064
>Applaud
It was pretty damn impressive

>>37980064

Offer tea, biscuits and VLS.
"Good jump. Eight out of ten."

Then we rib Goto. "Damn Goto. You got them moves."

>>37980247
2nd remodel/upgrade, modernization is basically fusion another ship girl on to one to boost the latter's stats.

Generally adds some nice details on the shipgirls that have Kai Ni/2nd Revision).... except U-511.

>>37980064
DESS
>Abide

>>37980326

No.

Take that shit ELSEWHERE.

HENRY T ELROD DID NOTHING WRONG.

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>>37980375
Brown German loli a shit~

>>37980064
>>Applaud
Oh. This Kongou's accuracy is better than the animoo one. I was expecting her to jump us by mistake.

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>>37980394

>>37980394
>Brown
>German

You mean Turkish right?

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You stare at the tableau, still trying to process it as Kongou leans down and begins her assault in earnest. “Chu~Chu~Chu~Chu~”

Goto flings his crossed arms over his face, guarding against her pecks as he stammers in Japanese. After a moment or two he collects his wits enough to press back against her, pushing her up – a little. She's gripping his shoulders firmly now and using them as anchors to pull herself closer, clearly having a ball.

That's when you begin to clap. A slow, slow clap.

“That,” you say with complete seriousness, “was amazing.”

“Desu?” she exclaims, shooting bolt upright and turning to look at you. “Oh, hello!”

“Get her OFF of me!” Goto snarls at you.

You look down at him. “No.”

“Admiral tried to hide behind you,” Kongou says knowingly, releasing his shoulders to strike a tough pose with her arms, sliding her old-fashioned sleeve back off her bicep. “But Kongou-chan's BURNING LOVE knows no bounds!”

“Yes,” you say, letting a small, smug smile slip onto your face. “Yes, he did.”

Goto lets his head flop back on the floorboards with a groan, and just points at Kongou. “Can you BLAME me?”

“Oooooh yeah,” you mutter, turning to Kongou again. “Hello, uh-”

>>37979198
>KANT-COLLE QUEST - HOW DO YOU EVEN PRONOUNCE THAT FUCK JAPAN
They literally read it out to you every time you start the game you fucking mongoloid

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>>37980504

“Kongou is fine!” she exclaims, springing off Goto's battered form to strike (another) pose in front of you. “I was built in England, so I'm comfortable with all sorts of English expressions and cultural forms! I'm at the forefront of the JSDF's co-operative efforts in this new age!”

You blink. “You... you actually read those pamphlets?”

“That's right!” she says, spinning in place, the hem of her sleeves almost smacking you in the face before she slams her foot into the floor to halt herself in (yet another) pose; arm flung out in front of her dramatically, picture frames rattling once more. “My English reading skills are the finest in the fleet!”

“Oh,” you say in a very small voice. “That's... neat.”

“And I'm always practicing!” she says with pride, thumping her fist into her chest. “I even found a story written about me!”

Goto, currently staggering up off the floor, seems to freeze at that mention – as do you. Even Arizona's eyebrow twitches.

“... a hist-”

“No, it was new, and it had really good drawings of me looking AWESOME!” she exclaims, pumping both her fists in the air. “But the English in it was kind of odd, every sentence ended with a question mark and the Admiral got really upset and t-”

“THANK you very MUCH Kongo that is VERY HELPFUL,” Goto growls as he grabs the edge of his desk for support, “but we kind of need you to focus on business, right now.”

>>37980525
Kongou found a CGRascal-translated doujin of her?

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>>37980509
>He actually plays the game
>He calls ME a mongoloid
>laughingshipsluts.png

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>>37980509

>>37980570
They aren't sluts... they're pure maidens.

>>37980570
>says laughingshipsluts.png
>posts a .jpg

the world we live in

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>>37980568
>Kongou found a CGRascal-translated doujin of her?

that was fast

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>>37980525
Best keep Kongou and her sisters away from JoJo. They'd probably infect the whole fleet with posing.

>>37980616
>she takes 30 planes in her upper hangar
>through three elevators at once
>pure

mmhmm

>>37980625
touche

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>>37980616
There is only one goddamn pure maiden in this thread, and it's Arizona.

>>37980247
Kai is typically where modifications are serious/different enough to significantly change the ship's combat capabilities.

To use a non-kantai comparison, all those personalized mobile suit like Gouf Custom or Gelgoog Custom would have been designated kai (改) after their name.

Kai Ni (改二) basically means modification two, or if used in a complete sentence, to change something a second time.

Do note, though, that just because it's been changed once or twice doesn't mean said model is now definitely better than the original base. Sometimes makeshift repairs or outright reconstruction actually makes the new version worse.

>>37980634

Actually, expose her to Jojo.

The posing will be AMAZING

>>37980684
Damn right.

>>37980684
It'll be awful when planefag kills her.

>>37980627
Do you happen to have a link to that doujin?

>>37980667

>last battleship in WW2 to be sunk by torpedoes
>pure

Ayup. A pure maiden indeed.

A purely LEWD maiden.

>>37980634
AWAKEN MY MASTERS will summon a new Kantai, trufax

>>37980755
Yeah...

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>>37980772
>last battleship sunk by torpedoes

get your mil-history right anon

How old is our admiral?

>>37980808
And what ship would that be?

>>37980755
>Planefag
>Killing anyone ever

>>37980822
Old.

As in actually admiral age. So, probably 50. At least that's how he's been depicted.

>>37980849
He killed Patchouli

>>37980824
Arizona sank from being bombed.

Off the top of my head, a better candidate for last battleship that got sunk by torpedoes would be Yamato; after Yamato, I don't recall any other battleships being sunk in WW2 period, though I may be wrong there.

She may have been hit by both bombs and torpedoes, but she ulimately capsized and sank after multiple hits to the same side of her hull by torps caused uneven flooding and her list became unsustainable.

>>37980864
alternate history, though I think he killed Sakuya with the whole magma dragon thing.

>>37980896
Yamato went down to dauntless's not avengers.

>>37980896
There were at least a dozen or so battleships sunk there anon.

Many Japanese, at least a few British and Italian, Bismarck, and Arizona.

>>37980906
Keine died of dick

>>37980922
those were before Yamato.

Yamato went on her suicide run to attack the Okinawa landings near the end of the war. By then, most of the other bb's had already gone to Davy Jone's locker, making Yamato the last BB to sink in WW2.

>>37980959
Sorry, I thought you meant in general.

Yeah, pretty sure Yamato was the last.

>>37981048
>being a hack writer running a shitty Murrica Fuck Yeah jerkfest of a perfectly decent setting without knowing a single thing about it

holy shit it is that guy again. BAWW HE PUT MENS IN MY SERIOUS CROTCH ANIME

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>>37980937
>>37981048
Gee, it's the two things that no planefag thread can be without.

>>37981048
... So what do tumors call their own tumors exactly? Puspimplecancerousboil?

As I recall...
>Kongou: Last BB sunk by sub
>Indianapolis: Last SHIP sunk by sub
>Yamato: Last BB sunk

>>37980864
>Planefag killed Patchouli in an alternate history of aWiY
>He used shipslut Patchouli pic to represent this Anon
> This Anon foolishly responded with a similar pic
I... I'm a dead man, aren't I?

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>>37981048

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>>37981048
>implying Kancolle has a real setting or Canon

I like looking at doujins and art of them as much as the next guy but let's get real here about the canon/setting of Kancolle (or the lack therefore of)

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>>37981048
then go somewhere else and read a different thread or board. No one is making you stay here.

>>37981048
If you don't like it, faggot, then fuck off and kill yourself. No one will miss you.

>>37980937
pls go

>>37981048
Do you have a script running to find planefag posts so you can bitch?

>>37981048
anon-chan is so kawaii-desu when he is mad

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>>37981048
>of a perfectly decent setting

Wait, this part didn't really register the first time around. Serious talk now - are you fucking serious?

>>37981171
Musashi's rack is decent, so he has you there

>>37981184
I wish this was set in Musashi's rack.

>>37981188
... Is this guy for real?

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>>37980917
Operation Ten-Go, where Yamato was sunk, took place in mid 1945.

Dauntless production ended by 1944, and the last major battle where they played a significant role was the Battle of the Philipinne Sea (also in 1944). Granted, when Task Force 58 attacked Yamato and her escorts there may have been SDB's in her air group, but by then they were largely being replaced by SB2C's.

And the point about torps sinking Yamato still stands. Dauntlesses never carried torps, Avengers did. And the moment where Yamato capsized pretty much sealed her fate.

Granted, you could argue that collateral from bombs did the real damage by pointing to the ammo explosion that ended Yamato, but by then she was already fully on her side and sinking fast, so in terms of a race the torps still won.

image source: historical kancolle from Sakazaki Freddy @ http://hijiribe.donmai.us/posts/1674149?tags=sakazaki_freddy

>>37981171

It's a "decent setting" if it allows GRORIUS NIPPON MIRITARY WWII worship without acknowledging Japanese WWII warcrimes.

>>37981128
You forgot the General Belgrano.

>>37981302
Well... as long as we don't have endure the Japanese Imperial Navy discipline, we'll be aokay.

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>>37981302

>>37981261
Unfortunately.

>>37981048
GARdian pls go, everyone knows you're a booty blasted faggot that can't write yourself.

>>37981339
Bitch Please! The General Belgrano was only a Brooklyn class Cruiser... (and yes, i'm from Arg).

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Why didn't you tell me

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Less arguing more BURNING LOVE

>>37981394

TWITTER, YOU FUCKING FAGGOT

>>37981299

Nope no Dauntlesses were carried by 1945. Their last major fleet battle was Philippine Sea back in June '44.

>>37981250
After discussion, it has been determined that setting the quest in Musashi's cleavage with waterslides and a steel drum band would be awesome.

>>37981339
Good point. I should have appended "WW2" to my list.

>>37981388
Yes, but it was still sunk by a submarine.

>>37981405
what happens after two weeks when it has been released?

>>37981448
Absolutely.

>>37981405
And I honor you for your service.

>>37981558
what if we all buy it?

>>37981558
too busy building ion frigates

>>37981558
Noted.

>>37981558
>the HD release
>No Cataclysm because of lost source code.
>Homeworld 2's story took a shit on the collective canon of the preceding games.
The only good thing in there is a version of Homeworld that works on modern machines, and that's not worth 30 dollars.

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“Right!” she says, taking a moment to straighten out her uniform. “What does my Admiral need?”

Goto tilts his head at you, so you take a step forward. “I'm Russel T. Settle, Rear Admiral, United States Na-”

“Admiral!” she exclaims, grabbing your proffered hand in both of hers and shaking it up and down vigorously enough to make you wobble unsteadily. “I'm so glad to meet you! I heard you're bringing all sorts of American ships with you to help us!”

“R-right,” you say, recovering your hand with a little difficulty. You almost place it on Arizona's shoulder to shove HER forward as the sacrificial lamb, but you think better of it. “Kongou, meet the USS Arizona. She's being assigned to a two-ship BB task force with you to patrol the Luzon strait.”

“Oooh, I remember you!” Kongou exclaims loudly. “You were laid down ten years after me, so – that makes me your onee-chan!” She thumps her chest proudly. “I'll take you under my wing and teach you everything there is to know about operating in the South Pacific!”

Arizona just stares at her.

“Onee-chan means older sister!” Kongou declares. “Aren't you excited to be going into battle with a new onee-san?”

Arizona stares.

Hey, planefag, I got a question. If Hornet is scarfing down burgers like there's no tomorrow, how is she going to get a sufficient supply of her favorite food in Japan? Methinks access to burgers is gonna be a little harder than it is in the US...

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>>37981716

“Anoooooo~” Kongou says, leaning over at the waist and turning her head to peer up at Arizona's chin from waist level, then back down again. “Are all American ships silent?”

You try to suppress your snort with violent muscular contraction, but it's not enough to avoid a rather low-lidded, flinty glance from Arizona.

“Oh, do you need a tissue-”

“No, no,” you say, warding Kongou off with your palms. “Just a sneeeeeeeeeeeeSO~” you exclaim, clapping your hands together as Arizona's eyelids slide lower, compressing her gaze into a narrow, sharp edge. “Why don't we go over the order of battle-”

>>37981716
Smile and nod at the granny, Arizona. Smile and nod

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>>37981743

“But Arizona-chan hasn't introduced herself yet!” Kongou pouts, her mouth going all wavy in an undeniably cute fashion. “Maybe she doesn't respect me as a battleship?” She brings her fist up in the already-familiar stance, and the air almost seems to ripple around her as she puts her all into a fierce look of determination. “Arizona-chan, my armor may be thinner, but my guns are just as big – and there's no ship fleeter in the fleet!” She thrusts a finger at Arizona. “If you doubt my skill, have at me – I'll show you that speed is armor!”

Arizona blinks, and tilts her head ever so slightly as Kongou waits, tense, poised and perfect.

Arizona raises one hand one-quarter inch.

>>37981765
Seriously though MPC is pretty good planefag

>>37981765

Kongou, you're a glorified battlecruiser settle down.

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>>37981765

Kongou's flowing attire becomes a whirling blur as she leaps into a backwards somersault away from Arizona, completing two full revolutions before hitting the wall behind her feet-first and springing off it. She grabs the ceiling fan on her way over, which survives just long enough to translate her momentum into a swinging motion before it comes ripping out of the ceiling, dangling by a single screw. Kongou's already released it, hitting the floor behind you and throwing herself into a forward roll followed by a spin as she leaps upright again, hands thrown wide in what looks like a fighting stance.

Behind you, the ceiling fan falls to the floor with a loud, brittle crash.

Arizona turns on one heel, swiveling around to face the Japanese BB with the mechanical surety of purpose more common to her main battery turrets. Kongou is almost visibly vibrating with barely-constrained energy.

Arizona reaches out again, very, very, VERY slowly, moving so cautiously that Kongou can't possibly regard it as a developing attack. Still, she focuses on it with intense scrutiny. As the slender, delicate-looking hand reaches her face, Kongou's eyes cross, her forehead almost wrinkling as she tries to stare it down.

And then Arizona simply brushes aside one long lock of hair, and withdraws with a small, bright-colored emblem in her hand. She hands it to you. You accept it, feeling the scratching of velcro on the back of -

- “God damn you, Hate,” you mutter under your breath. It's the Corporals, well, Corporal insignia, two chevrons over crossed rifles. “Kongou, where did this come from?”

“I found it on the sidewalk,” she admits. “It looked really neat, but then I found out it sticks to stuff, sometimes, if you stick it on things!” Her eyes light up with glee. “The future is so NEAT!”

You look down at the patch.

You look at Arizona.

You look at Admiral Goto.

“I changed my mind,” you tell him seriously.

>>37981804
....What just happened?

>>37981840
Kongou's been murdering our enlisted.

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>>37981840
>....What just happened?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_detailpage&v=h14wr4pXZFk#t=31

Quite literally this.

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>>37981716
>“Onee-chan means older sister!”

>>37981840
So far as I can tell, some time back, Kongo found one of Corporal Hate's velcro insignia on the ground, and stuck it in her hair, because Kongo.

Arizona spotted this, and moved to remove it. Kongo took this as a potential attack, and flipped out. The second time, Arizona moved much more cautiously, and successfully removed the insignia.

I could be misinterpreting it. Clearly, Kongo's actions are not to be deciphered by the mortal mind.

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>>37981804
So... how many times has she broken the fan?

>>37981958
The have them ship one a day, just to be sure.

>>37981958
enough that it alone is job security for maintenance

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So how long until we meet our fellow European vessels?

Will we ever run into Big E? Just wondering

>>37982077
>European
Fuck off you freedom-hatin' kraut.

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>>37982086
Oh I sincerely hope so.

>>37982086
planefag might as well rename himself historyfag.
If it tickles his history boner, it's happening.

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>>37982077
When we go to get a drink.

>>37982077
>>37982086
When Planefag turns this into a 100+ thread quest and disappears for a year and a half at some point.

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You stumble out of the administrative building, not so much using your cane as leaning on it, your brain still struggling to process exactly what you just saw. Goto was making muted noises about the four light cruisers being assigned to escort them; noises you simply nodded at as you backed out of the room. Arizona'd sent you a particularly narrow look as you fled; the eyes of a warrior berating a fleeing coward, but seriously, FUCK her, that shit in there, that was, what, is, even, no.

Just, no.

And then, of course, there's the matter of Hate. He's been surreptitiously (and not-so-surreptitiously) swapping out his proper insignia with his old Lance Corporal patches; to the point where you've instructed your staff (you have one of those now, a concept that's hard to get used to) to keep a supply of proper patches on hand to re-adorn him. It's proper, and correct, but more importantly it seems to annoy the hell out of him, which is what really counts. Hate regards his promotion as one long step away from actual combat duties (which it is,) and loathes it with unconcealed fury. At least the patches for his plate carrier and such are Velcro-equipped, making-

…. plate carrier.

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>>37982131
>>37982086

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>>37982182

You look up just in time to see Corporal Hate from a distance, vanishing around a corner with what looks like a large storage crate for 40mm grenades. You give chase at your best hobble, suppressing a brief, violent urge to smash that fucking cane against a nearby decorative tree and keep smashing it when the tip slips on some fresh-cut grass strewn across the sidewalk. You almost go down again while rounding a corner, and this time you DO snarl, your sorely-tested patience giving way at last, sending that fucking cane bouncing off a landscaper's oak with a throw your dad's golfing buddies would've been proud of.

Quite unexpectedly, you hear a muffled squeak of fright emerge from behind some of the bushes, followed by a poorly-stifled whimper.

>WE MUST INTERCEPT HATE AT ALL COSTS
>oh god, shipslut down, must investigate

>>37982207
>>oh god, shipslut down, must investigate

>>37982182
>loathes it with unconcealed fury
>Corporal Hate

How appropriate. :P

>>37982207
>WE MUST INTERCEPT HATE AT ALL COSTS

She'll be fine, builds character.

>>37982207
>oh god, shipslut down, must investigate
It could be Willie D, and in that event, we must perform damage control before the base burns down.

Besides, we've got a staff to ensure Hate's suffering. Might as well use it. Gotta think like an admiral.

>>37982207
>>WE MUST INTERCEPT HATE AT ALL COSTS

>>37982207
>oh god, shipslut down, must investigate

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>>37982077

Pic related maybe?

>>37982207
>>oh god, shipslut down, must investigate

>>37982207
>oh god, shipslut down, must investigate

>>37982207
>oh god, shipslut down, must investigate

>>37982207
>oh god, shipslut down, must investigate

>>37982207
>oh god, shipslut down, must investigate

You win this round, Hate.

>>37982207
>oh god shitslut down.
Saving private shipslut.

>>37982207
>>oh god, shipslut down, must investigate
perhaps she can get us to hate faster

totally not my inner white night

>>37982207
>oh god, shipslut down, must investigate
It could be Willie D.
Hate can wait.
And if he does something stupid, we'll give him the lash.

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I wanna see a ship girl like this.

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>>37982207
>oh god, shipslut down, must investigate
Hate can't escape us. He'll never escape us.

We'll be patient and strike when he least expects it.

>>37982077
>>37982159
Yesss. Much love for Bismarck.

>>37982287
He shall pay for injuring this poor, innocent boatgirl.

>>37982207
>oh god, shipslut down, must investigate
WE'LL THROW HER/HIM AT HATE AS AMMO.

>>37982207
>oh god, shipslut down, must investigate

Eh, Hate can't avoid us forever.

>>37982207
>>oh god, shipslut down, must investigate

>>37982207
>oh god, shipslut down, must investigate

Rough day for everyone here.

>>37979809
>thug lyfe Iowa slinging 11" katie shells
Speak softly and carry the BIGGEST MOTHERFUCKING STICK!

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>>37982303
I would also have Plane girls too.

>>37982308
Fuck Bismarck, piece of shit got sunk by cruisers and biplanes. WORST BB.

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>>37982159
Thanks for the pic. One can never have enough art of superior engineering.

>>37982424
Evidence points to Bismarck likely sinking itself with scuttling charges.

>>37982416
We already have a Quest for that.

>>37982416
as long as we aren't the ones leaving her as a widow

>>37982424
guns were calibrated to shoot modern warplanes, not shitty old biplanes

>>37982440
>didn't even have the guts to die in combat

WORST. BB.

>>37982207
>>oh god, shipslut down, must investigate

>>37982473

Guns calibrated for modern combat still should have shredded Swordfish.

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>>37982436
Agreed.

>>37982473
>guns were calibrated to shoot modern warplanes, not shitty old biplanes

How would that make them less effective?

Shipslut down wins, obvs. WRITAN

>>37982502
>>37982561
you ca't shred what you can't hit cause the gun sights are aligned to lead something 5 times faster

>>37982561
Planes flew too slow, they lead to much.

>>37982585
That is an engineering disaster. You should always design for any contingency. What if they wanted to use the AA guns to strafe boats nears the ship?
The lead speed should have been from 0 to the max possible...
but hindsight is 20/20...

>>37982590
>>37982561
You'd think the guns would be given a manual override system or something just in case, given the much touted German engineering...

>>37982563
>not hobble-warbling in terror away from insanity

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Threadly reminder to never play for keeps when challenged to mahjong by Ashigara.

We need to find Gambier Bay and see if she feels up to trolling Chokai.

We also need to send Shigure and the Willie D out on a mission together.

surprised we still haven't run into fairies or supply expeditions

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>>37982674
Need to find Albacore and Tenryuu

Why is Kongou so magical?

I'm still waiting for Harder, The Best Shipdude, to reappear.

>tfw no USS Oklahoma

;-;

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>>37982731
I'm waiting for Harder to accidentally become the protag of a harem

>>37982772
https://danbooru.donmai.us/posts/1853943?tags=uss_oklahoma ??

>>37982207
>oh god, shipslut down, must investigate
More PTSD suffering for Admiral.

>>37982674
White Plains sank Chokai. Gambier Bay got gang-banged.

>>37982303
I think you mean ship lady.
Which yes, would be good.

>>37982778
Harder should specifically waifu any shipgirls he directly fought in WW2

>>37982772
go to bed ridire oklahoma a shit

>>37982817

So, a bunch of destroyers?

>>37982837
they don't it call meth production center of the USA for nothing

I don't actually know if they call it that.

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>>37982729
Because

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You limp into the landscaping, cursing quietly as the short bushes pull and tug at your uniform trousers. Something rustles not-so-quietly in the bushes as it tries to make its pitiful escape. You pick up your limp and manage to close within a few feet of the mysterious sniffler when she makes a break for the open.

“WILLE DEE!” you bellow. The diminutive destroyer girl freezes mid-flight, seeming to vibrate in place a bit.

“Wille Dee, were you hiding in the bushes and crying just now?” you demand.

She turns towards you slowly, her face a tear-stained mask of blank terror. She makes a tiny little sound that mewls and dies on the hot sidewalk between you.

You limp a few steps closer. “I can't hear you, sailor.”

“Mrrmrrrmrrmm,” she manages, her lower lip quavering a little bit.

You hover over the short girl, and lean over just a bit to crowd her. “Sailor, are you lying to me?”

“Mmmmmuuuuuuuuh,” she manages, her watery eyes jittering up to glance at you in terror.

“... oh, good,” you relent, rocking back on your heels. “So, Willie, what's up with you today?”

“nuthin,” she says very quietly.

“Sorry, what was that?”

“nuthin.”

“So you've been wasting the whole day?” you ask her, which kicks her into a higher tremor frequency. “N-n-no!”

“So you were...”

“I went to g-g-gunnery practice!”

You check your watch, very slowly, and then dig out your smartphone to go through the day's schedule. You shade the screen with your hand to get a better look in the noonday sun -

“Stand still, sailor.”

Willie freezes, her diminutive sideways shuffle halted firmer than if you'd nailed her feet to the concrete. You peruse the schedule for a minute or two longer, then slide your phone away again.

>>37983029
She's lying.

EXECUTE HER

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>>37983029

“According to this, you should *still* be at gunnery practice – and you need the practice,” you tell her. She says nothing, but that last bit makes her slender chest quaver dangerously, as if she's on the verge of sobbing. “Why did you leave?”

“... someone gave me an errand,” she says very quietly. “So I went.”

You take your time looking over your shoulder into the little mini-park you found her in; a triangle between three major sidewalk paths. “What was the errand, sailor?”

Willie Dee seems to have fixed her gaze on the third button of your uniform shirt. Her little fists are balled up, white-knuckled against her thighs as she stands at rigid attention. “To fetch some paint to mark targets.”

You squint at her. “What kind of paint, sailor?”

The girl isn't vibrating now so much as she seems to be *buzzing* with barely restrained... something. “Checkered paint, sir.”

You take a second to absorb that information as you study the little destroyer in front of you.


>... I take it you know about checkered paint?
>... this is a serious violation of acquisition protocol, Willie Dee. I'll need the names of whoever put you up to this.
>... oh, that's all? That's special-order stuff. Go wait in front of Administration and I'll send someone over with a can.

>>37983102
>>... oh, that's all? That's special-order stuff. Go wait in front of Administration and I'll send someone over with a can.

>>37983102
>... this is a serious violation of acquisition protocol, Willie Dee. I'll need the names of whoever put you up to this.

>>37983102
>>... this is a serious violation of acquisition protocol, Willie Dee. I'll need the names of whoever put you up to this.
WHEREVER I GO, I MUST ALSO BULLY

>>37983102
>>... this is a serious violation of acquisition protocol, Willie Dee. I'll need the names of whoever put you up to this.

>>37983102
>... I take it you know about checkered paint?
Be nice to the Willie.

>>37983102
>... this is a serious violation of acquisition protocol, Willie Dee. I'll need the names of whoever put you up to this.

>>37983102
>>... this is a serious violation of acquisition protocol, Willie Dee. I'll need the names of whoever put you up to this.
The bullying has to stop.

>>37983102
>>... this is a serious violation of acquisition protocol, Willie Dee. I'll need the names of whoever put you up to this.
We look after our own.

>>37983102
>>... this is a serious violation of acquisition protocol, Willie Dee. I'll need the names of whoever put you up to this.

>>37983102
>>... I take it you know about checkered paint?
Cause I fuckin' don't.

>>37983102
>>... this is a serious violation of acquisition protocol, Willie Dee. I'll need the names of whoever put you up to this.

>>37983102
>>... I take it you know about checkered paint?
>>... this is a serious violation of acquisition protocol, Willie Dee. I'll need the names of whoever put you up to this.

>>37983102
>... I take it you know about checkered paint?

no bully

>>37983102
> ... I take it you know about checkered paint?

>>37983102
>... I take it you know about checkered paint?

Yeah... that checkered paint, man... shit.

>>37983102
>>... I take it you know about checkered paint?
she may be hiding somethign else.

>>37983102

>... I take it you know about checkered paint?

Poor Willie.

>>37983102
>... this is a serious violation of acquisition protocol, Willie Dee. I'll need the names of whoever put you up to this.

ANGRY ADMIRAL

>>37983102
>... I take it you know about checkered paint?
Just because Willie fucks up everything she touches doesn't mean she should be bullied.

>>37983162
It's like keys to the drop zone, or chem light batteries, or grid squares. She was sent to fetch something nonsensical as a hazing ritual.

Even though you could probably make a chem light battery if you could figure out how to fire one from a mortar or howitzer.

>>37983102
>... oh, that's all? That's special-order stuff. Go wait in front of Administration and I'll send someone over with a can.

Something about this girl makes bullying her irresistible.

>>37983102
>... I take it you know about checkered paint?

>>37983102
>... this is a serious violation of acquisition protocol, Willie Dee. I'll need the names of whoever put you up to this.

Hazing poor Willie is a low blow.

>>37983162

When you wanna pull one over on a boot you send 'em to get checkered paint, a box of grid squares, keys to the humvee, chemlight batteries... things like that. Usually they'll burn the day up running all over the post trying to get it from various shops and offices.

>>37982809
My mistake.

>>37983102
>... this is a serious violation of acquisition protocol, Willie Dee. I'll need the names of whoever put you up to this.

>>37983102
>Which ever option leads to the surest result of somebody getting a good ol' cane whackin'.

>>37983102
>... this is a serious violation of acquisition protocol, Willie Dee. I'll need the names of whoever put you up to this.

Willy ain't a good shot already, she needs that practice, instead of wasting time on errands.

>>37983102
>>... this is a serious violation of acquisition protocol, Willie Dee. I'll need the names of whoever put you up to this.

It's clear that someone put her up to this.

>>37983232
Wasn't there a guy who got sent on a similar errand, vanished only to reutrn with those objects?

>>37983206
>>37983232
Don't forget the prop wash, flight line, fallopian tubes and ID 10T forms.

Calling it (fairly closely) for SERIOUS VIOLATION OF PROTOCOL SHAMEFUR DISPRAY! Writing!

>>37983102
>>... this is a serious violation of acquisition protocol, Willie Dee. I'll need the names of whoever put you up to this.

Maybe they wanted her away from gunnery practice.

They figured it would be safer for all involved.

>>37983274

if you're clever, and good, you can counter troll by procuring those items, yes, but if you know enough to be able to find them and/or make them, you're usually not going to get asked to find them.

>>37983102
>... this is a serious violation of acquisition protocol, Willie Dee. I'll need the names of whoever put you up to this.

>>37983274
>Wasn't there a guy who got sent on a similar errand, vanished only to reutrn with those objects?

http://www.duffelblog.com/2013/01/awol-private-returns-after-seven-years-with-box-of-grid-squares/

>>37983102
>>... this is a serious violation of acquisition protocol, Willie Dee. I'll need the names of whoever put you up to this.

>>37983102
Tell her how to make checkered paint: you strap nine cans of spray paint together in a 3x3 pattern, then give them square nozzles.

>>37983102
>... I take it you know about checkered paint?

No bully the Willie!

>>37983102
>... I take it you know about checkered paint?
Plz no bully the willie, she's had a hard life

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>>37983102
>... this is a serious violation of acquisition protocol, Willie Dee. I'll need the names of whoever put you up to this.

>>37983458

The only bullying will happen in bed.

>>37983623
you can't dick a ship, anon

>>37983674
TORPEDO IN THE WATER

>>37983623
But who would be willing to give Willie the D?

>>37983674
Then we shall build a machine that will allow us to have sex with them!

Reach for the Stars, Anon!

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>>37983674

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>>37983674

>>37983737
Considering her luck, she'd break your dick.

>>37983674
They have mouths.

>>37983774
You fool! Knowing it's Willie Dee, she'll probably accidentally bite it off.

>>37983770
>Implying willie would ever hurt her crew or allow them to be hurt

>>37983770
Or we'd have to take responsibility.

>>37983810
silly anon, that's what ring gags are for!

>>37983810
Willie Dee kept her crew safe through every fuckup, you'd be fine.

>>37983821
Ro-chan and Willie should meet.

>>37983767
Best route.

>>37983770
Knowing her, it'll be the condom that will break.

>>37983881
>implying that's not the end goal
>Implying willie D wouldn't turn into jackie fucking chan the instant the baby is born

>>37983979
>willie D goes full momma bear mode
>She learns how to weaponize and project her jinx aura onto other opponents.

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It's clear from the way she crawled into the bushes to cry her little Fletcher-Class heart out that Wille Dee's no fool, which is more than you can say for some sailors (and commissioned officers) you've worked with during your career. For a moment you're tempted to console Willie Dee; to rub her head affectionately and tell her about the asshole LT you regaled with tales of the North American Deck-Pecker so many years ago when he pitched a little autism-fit over something nobody fucking cared about...

… but the way she's standing ramrod-straight, fighting with all her might to keep her misery from quavering to the surface, you just can't bring yourself to do it. She's been called upon to serve her country once more as a warship, and she's taking that duty seriously – more seriously than Kongou seems to, at any rate. She deserves better than patronization.

Thus, you let your eyes bore through the poor destroyer for long moments before you frown. “This is a serious violation of protocol, Willie.”

Her apprehension seems to shift sideways into confusion. “S-sir?”

“Checkered paint is kind of hard to manufacture,” you inform her seriously. “In fact, back in your day it was regarded as a joke, I think, just like 'when pigs fly'.”

She blinks. “S-s-s-sir...?”

>>37984031
Jesus Fucking Christ, She'd Be Unstoppable.

And then she'd get a ladder.

GENTLEMEN, WE HAVE A MISSION

>>37983979
These aren't just anthromorphic representations of ships anon.
These are the recently awakened souls of ships that have been destroyed and sunken to the bottom of the dark sea, the tortured souls that have escaped their watery graves to be given new life against a new menace.
What makes you think you can impregnate a ghost ship?

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>>37984044

“Welcome to 2018, kid,” you say. “Ships fight with missiles that can hunt down one unlucky son-of-a-bitch three hundred miles away and stuff a warhead right up his ass; ships are equipped with radar that can pick up a sparrow at twenty miles and hit it with a Sparrow,” (this draws a twitch from Willie's eyebrows, but you plow on,) “-and modern manufacturing can make paint that absorbs said radar emissions. Paint that absorbs *radar,* Willie. Checkered paint ain't shit. It's still expensive though, and even the cheap stuff requires proper forms.” You sigh and pull out your cell phone. “Someone was trying to skip that by using you as their proxy thief. This needs to be dealt with. Who put you up to this?”

Willie stares at you for a second longer, utter astonishment evident on her features. You stare back at her with the annoyed look of a high-ranking man who's patience with his subordinate is rapidly running out, a look you've honed to a razor's edge over the years. The Skipper Stare, as it's known, is always effective. Willie Dee swallows her spit and your bullshit in one lump and stammers a reply. “I d-don't know their n-names, sir, everyone's new, but they w-w-were the only ones wearing g-green-”

“Aaaaah, that's enough, thank you,” you say. You punch the quick-dial and hold the phone to your ear, bumping the volume button up enough to guarantee the conversation won't be private.

>>37984031

Willie D: Wahh I don't want no trabble!

>>37984069
Willpower.

>>37984069
Mythological precedent.

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>>37984073

“Goto here,” you hear the Admiral's voice rasp.

“It's Settle. We just had a disciplinary problem with one of my destroyers and a few of your cruisers.”

You can feel the utter, savage hate rolling off Goto right through the phone; the very silence before he speaks is terrifying in itself. “Elaborate.”

“I've got Willie Dee right here; she tells me those two broccoli-colored torpedo cruisers of yours sent her away from gunnery practice to fetch a can of checkered paint from inventory. No forms, no requisition request, not even a goddamn quartermaster's memo.”

You can almost hear the air rushing into your phone as Goto's rage cools and contracts into a thoughtful pause. “That's a problem. They need it, yeah, but they've been flaunting protocol for too long, now. Swing by my office, I'll give you the forms they need to fill out. I'll write an order for it, too.” Goto pauses for a second, probably to let that shit-eating grin creeping into his voice loose into his office, because when he resumes, his tone is once again the perfect picture of the put-upon administrator. “They probably wanted her to steal it from US Navy stores, if they picked her. I can write a letter of a-”

“-that won't be necessary, Admiral,” you reply sternly. “Things are... difficult, right now, and our charges are catching up to a new era. No need to get all picky about it.”

“Very well then,” Goto replies, with an edge in his voice that promises nothing good for his own wayward charges. “I'll have that paperwork for you in a few minutes.”

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>>37984073
>Green
Sounds like something Ooi would do.

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>>37984133

“I'll send Willie over for it,” you reply. “Bye.” The call terminates with a *beep,* and you turn to look at your thoroughly confused little destroyer. “You know where Admiral Goto's office is, right?”

“... yes,” she replies. “Sir! Yes, sir.”

“Go along, then,” you instruct. “Wait outside of Administration, I'll send someone with the paint.”

After Willie Dee scurries off (waiting till she think's you're out of sight before wiping at her face with her shirt-tails,) you swear and curse some more as you dig through the bushes for your damned cane. Thus equipped, you hobble straight towards the maintenance area; flagging down a passing sailor on a motorized cart and commandeering his services to cover ground quicker. You find Corporal Hate in one of the larger workshops, hovering over an empty paint can. He's taken the time to stencil “Checkered Paint” onto it, and even covered over the “color” image on it with actual checkering. You hobble up behind him as he begins pouring, very, very carefully, into the can from another, using a small funnel. He's taken the checkered cardboard divider which secures 40mm grenades snugly in their case and carefully trimmed it to fit inside the larger can. You wait till he's filled the first square with white paint and set it down to reach for a can of black primer.

“Thin your paints!” you shout over the cacophony and clash of mechanics actively servicing a large truck engine behind you. Corporal Hate almost jumps, but he's gotten used to your talent for, as he puts it, “bird-dogging me like an asshole-sniffing Basset hound.... asshole.” He gives you an extremely unamused look and turns back to his task. “Hey, skipper.”

“She'll be waiting in front of Administration,” you tell him, and before he can make reply, you spin smartly on your cane and hobble away, feeling very, very pleased with yourself.

Oh, this is gonna be good.

Uh oh

>>37984171
This is going to be great.

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>>37984133
>>37984171
Wow, I'm glad we stopped to see what was up with Willie.

And nice job Hate, looking out for Willie by making sure the paint actually exists.

>>37984171
Settle, you magnificent bastard.

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>>37984171
Fantastic

>>37984171
Oh, I can't wait for it.

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>>37984133
OUR HONORU HAS BEEN IMPUGNED
DISHONOROBOURU!
DISHONOROBOURU!
DISHONOROBOURU!

>>37984171
Aww that's sweet Hate.

>>37984171
Aw shucks, ain't Hate just a softy for the mentally slow girls?
And ain't we a great big bastard?

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>>37984133
>>37984171
they are all magnificent bastards.

>>37984264
Well, looks like the other Big E has decided to visit.

>>37984073
>>37984171
JMSDF-USN-USMC joint ops best ops.

>>37984279
Willie ain't slow, she's just been bullied all her life and has an aura that takes the probabilities of Weird Bullshit Accidents and cranks them up to a 1.0

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>>37984171
This is going to be good.

>>37984327
And she'll never, EVER lose her crew.

Willie might be cursed, but goddamn she's dedicated.

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>>37984299
There can be only one.

>>37984344
Clearly, we need to find some adorable little kid that Willie can declare her crew.


Then Take into battle and watch her go ful SAMURAI (EXCEPT I GUESS IT WOULD BE COWBOY OR MOMMA EAGLE BECAUSE AMERICA) ONEE-CHAN

>>37984364
... All respect due to the Enterprise, the God-Emperor of Mankind is a bit beyond her ability to fight.

>>37984382
Destroyer escort.

NEXT TIME ON SHIPSLUTS QUEST: I HAVE NO IDEA BECAUSE I'M ABOUT TO USE UP THE REST OF MY PREPLANNED MATERIEL RIGHT NOW!

writing~

>>37984399
Dude's currently entombed in a life support system. That doesn't sound too tough.

>>37984433
you double dubbing sumbitch

>>37984399
The Emps would turn the Enterprise into a surfboard.

>>37984446
... So sorry, Enterprise.

>>37984458
And it would be the finest surfboard in History.

>>37984433
Quick, anons! Throw ideas at planefag!

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>>37984458
as long as it's this enterprise, I am okay with it.

>>37984498
Willie's Excellent Adventure

>>37984498
That's half of what I PM the dude for.

I gave him something he loved tonight, in fact. You're welcome in advance.