YOU are Bellatrix Curis, Novice Battle-Sister, and, if you do say so yourself, this crazed-chicken you've prepared is quite good.

A frakking masterpiece, even- at least when one considers that you cooked it over an open fire (a fire in a hole in the ground, no less) with no spices and no prior experience cooking crazy-chicken-meat.

Alirye, your pointy-eared companion, is sitting smack dab in the middle of the clearing you've set up camp in, presumably because she wants to be as far away from the trees of the spooky forest as possible. She didn't eat as much of the crazy-chicken-meat as you- when you asked, she pointed out that she's not quite as... 'bulky' as you are, and assured you that she had eaten plenty.

…

You still don't know what planet you're on. Hell, you don't even know what /sector/ you're in. You don't know why you're here. You don't know why you're here with a xenos witch- nor do you know, for that matter, why she seems so... human.

There's no way she's any less human than those really big abhumans- Ogryn, you think they were called- and she certainly doesn't eat babies (if she can't even eat half of a crazed chicken, then there's no way she could eat a whole baby).

You finish off the last of the meat just as the sun is setting, offer a quick prayer to the God-Emperor.

Alirye seems to notice this, and, after you finish your prayer, she says, “You pray to your... Emperor... an awful lot.”

You nod. “My faith is my shield.”

[1/2]

“... Is your 'God-Emperor' not dying- if not dead? Why would he devote so much as a moment to hearing your prayers?” She pauses. “Even if he did, how could be possibly answer them?”

…

You take a deep breath and tell yourself that she does not mean to insult Him. Repeating this to youself a few times, you control your urge to slap her for blaspheming. She is not malicious, insofar as you can ascertain. Only curious. Ignorant.

>Educate her. Show her the Emperor's Light!
>Ask if her people have gods. Keep the conversation balanced.
>Ask the Emperor to show her a sign.
>Change the subject (to what?)
>Something else? (Write-in!)

>>38174741

>Educate her. Show her the Emperor's Light!

>>38174741
>Educate her. Show her the Emperor's Light!
LET ME PREACH HIS NAME

>>38174741
>Ask if her people have gods. Keep the conversation balanced.
For now.

>>38174741
>Ask if her people have gods. Keep the conversation balanced.
The Emperor would never forgive her for being a xeno anyway.

>>38174741
>>Educate her. Show her the Emperor's Light!

>>38174741
>Same way your race is sooooo great and dying.*sassy black woman snapping fingers* Mhhhhmmmmmm~

>>38174741
>>>Educate her. Show her the Emperor's Light!

>>38174874
>>38174909
>>38175121
>>38175229
>Dispel her ignorance!

>>38174948
>>38175082
Ask about /her/ gods!

>>38175185
Sass her.

Okay, writing!

I gave the first vote an extra ~10 minutes or so to let anons trickle in, the rest of the votes'll be 15 minutes or so.

>>38175241
Can we get the sass as a bonus move?

>>38175275
I considered it, but I'm not sure that you'd even know that the Eldar are dying out. Better safe than sorry an' what-not.

>>38174741
>>Ask if her people have gods. Keep the conversation balanced.

I wonder if we could become a Rogue Trader.

What do you need to do that, again?

>>38175358
A writ of trade and a lot of money. It's pretty much hereditary.

>>38175439

Could anyone with a spaceship try doing it?

>>38175473
You'd need to seriously impress someone seriously important. Some dynasties have their warrant signed by the Emperor himself.

>>38175473
You could try. But a writ makes it legitimate in the eyes of most Imperial authorities. Getting a writ is extremely hard though if you're not born into it.

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>>38175241
Show her the pout when she still doesn't get it

>>38175745
+ a Lho-Stick lighter under her hand if she jeers at what we're preaching.

You clear your throat, look Alirye in the eyes, and begin to preach.

…

“... Even after Horus had wounded Him and knocked Him down, the Emperor could not bring Himself to strike down His son. But, before Horus could strike the killing blow, a Guardsman- a mere mortal man- stepped between Horus and the mortally-wounded Emperor. That man was Saint Ollanius Pius, and, when Horus destroyed him, the Emperor saw that His son had given himself over completely to the Ruinous Powers. The Emperor smote Horus, completely and utterly destroying the traitor where he stood.”

Alirye frowns. “This Pius guy sounds like an idiot.”

You glare at her. “The courageous often are.”

“... Sorry.” She coughs. “That was rude.”

You nod. “Yes. It was...” you take a moment to recall where you were, then continue, “The Emperor was near death, so He was placed upon the Golden Throne, which sustains him even now. The Astronomican, the light by which Imperial ships navigate in the Warp, is a psychic manifestation of His will.”

You gesture to the setting sun. “The Emperor is mankind's guiding light. His will dispels darkness and reveals the road ahead.” You shake your head. “That is why I pray to the Emperor, even though He is confined to the Golden Throne. Where are /your/ gods?”

She sighs. “That... that is a story for another time, I think.” She glances up at the sky. “We should take turns sleeping,” she says, “to make sure we don't get murdered in the middle of the night.”

“Sounds like a plan,” you agree.

“Good. Do you want to take first watch, or shall I?”

>Take first watch.
>Take second watch; it's past your bedtime!
>Something else? (Write-in!)

>>38175926
>>Something else? (TAKE ALL THE WATCH, TRUST NOT THE XENO.)

>>38175473
>>38175633
they call that piracy unless you got that writ

>Take first watch

>>38175926
>>Take first watch.

>>38175926
>Take first watch.
I-it's not to see if she's cute while sleeping!

>>38175926
>Take first watch.

>>38175926
>Take second watch; it's past your bedtime!
She's already had plenty of rest from what we did to her.

How much sleep do Eldar need in comparison to humans?

>>38175944
NEVER TRUST A XENO

>>38175974
>>38175988
>>38176020
>>38176048
>First watch! It means you're more likely to get some extra shut-eye on the back half of the night~

>>38176075
Sure, I'll take wa-ZZZZZZ

Okay! I'll need three rolls, each with a different die!
ROLL
>1d2
>1d10
>1d100

Rolled 2 + 1 (1d2 + 1)

>>38176290

Rolled 6 (1d10)

>>38176290
I'll do the ten!

Rolled 1 (1d2)

>>38176290

Rolled 56 (1d100)

>>38176290

Rolled 76 (1d100)

>>38176290

>>38176307
>2

>>38176308
>6

>>38176329
>56

Okay, writing!

Mikos or Nuns?

>>38176830
Lewd Eldar.

>>38176830
We'll have nun of that here.

>>38176830
Which sort of Nun are we talking about here, Catholic or Buddhist?

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>>38176888
I thought mikos were shinto

>>38176999
That just means they really, really respect Machine Spirits in addition to the Emperor.

“I'll take first watch.” You give her your best reassuring smile.

Judging by her reaction, your 'reassuring smile' is anything but. Either that, or being reassured causes her to blush furiously and blurt, “N-no funny business!”

You blink, somewhat puzzled. It takes a moment for you to get what she's talking about. “I'm not gonna do anything to you while you're asleep.” It takes you another moment to get what she actually /means/.

“Where's the fun in molesting you when you're not even awake to enjoy it?” You shake your head. “That's just crazy.”

She stays silent for a few moments, before meekly asking, “... Promise?”

You nod. “I promise.”

The sun sinks completely past the horizon, Alirye lays down by the fire-hole, and the world slowly slips into darkness.

You find yourself gazing skyward, admiring countless pinpricks of light that pierce the blackness of the night sky. After awhile, you accept that you don't recognize this sky at all. You're staring at strange stars from the surface of a strange world.

Any one of those stars could be home.

…

That's not saying much, though. For all you know, any one of those stars could be Sol, the star around which Holy Terra orbits.

…

After... you don't even know how long, Alirye wakes up. You can see her checking herself over in the dim light of the fire... and you could swear that there's a ghost of a disappointed look on her face.

“... Get some sleep, Bella,” she yawns.

“Right.” You lay down and take the opportunity to watch her do stretches before finally drifting off to sleep.

…

You dream of all sorts of nice things. Alirye's butt, fire, the Emperor, what Alirye's butt looks like bare, Alirye shooting fire out of her butt, and so on and so forth.

…

[1/2]

“... -ella. Bella.” Something's shaking you. “Bella! Wake up!” Alirye hisses, her voice a harsh whisper.

You open your eyes and notice immediately that it isn't morning.
At least, not by the standards of the sky, which is still mostly dark.
Alirye is kneeling beside you, shaking you and trying to wake you up.

The realization that she wouldn't wake you up /this/ early for no reason perks you up almost immediately. “... What is it?” You whisper.

Alirye glances over her left shoulder, then answers, “I'm not sure. But... I think it's human.”

“Friendly?”

“No idea.”

You look in the same direction that she did, and you catch a glimpse of something.

>A red robe, and perhaps an undulating mechadendrite. A Tech-priest?
>A fancy hat. Even fancier than the Inquisitor's. A... better Inquisitor?
>... Cat ears? What the frak? Maybe it's an abhuman?
>A... you're not even sure what that is. It looks like some sort of primative weapon.
>Something else? (Write-in!)

>It's a captcha the QM forgot to do! Sorry 'bout that.

>>38177314
>>A red robe, and perhaps an undulating mechadendrite. A Tech-priest?
Tech-priest hype!

>>38177314
>A red robe, and perhaps an undulating mechadendrite. A Tech-priest?

>>38177314
>>A red robe, and perhaps an undulating mechadendrite. A Tech-priest?

>>38177314
>... Cat ears? What the frak? Maybe it's an abhuman?

>>38177314
>A fancy hat. Even fancier than the Inquisitor's. A... better Inquisitor?
Can it be a Rogue Trader instead? I hear they can acquire fancy hats.

>>38177314
>A red robe, and perhaps an undulating mechadendrite. A Tech-priest?
Beep beep!

>>38177314
>A red robe, and perhaps an undulating mechadendrite. A Tech-priest?

>>38177314

>... Cat ears? What the frak? Maybe it's an abhuman?

>>38177478
>>38177446
>>38177377
>>38177366
>>38177359
Oh dear.
>http://i.imgur.com/2T29n06.jpg nsfw

>>38177542
Wow, lewd.

>>38177314
>A red robe, and perhaps an undulating mechadendrite. A Tech-priest?

>>38177542
No anon, bad. I don't want a robotics fetish too.

>>38177359
>>38177366
>>38177377
>>38177446
>>38177478
>>38177568
>Techpriestess is go!

>>38177381
>>38177500
I'm honestly surprised you guys didn't try to force a tie to get a catgirl techpriestess.
Truly, the Emperor protects.


>>38177430
So fancy...

Okay! Writing!

>>38177711

>Catgirl techpriestess

Well, shit. We missed out.

>>38177711
>I'm honestly surprised you guys didn't try to force a tie to get a catgirl techpriestess.
I thought about it, but the two concepts are fine on their own.

>>38177811
Beep boop meow.

It would've been fun to write, at the very least.

>>38177843
Well, if you really want to do it, we just see a red hood and not what's under it, right?

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>>38177843

If I post an image of the most sadistic, borderline Satanic feline I have, would that convince you to do it?

>>38177859
Oh naw regular techpriest alone's gonna be a hoot.

plus vibrator attachments if QM goes that far

… No, you're sure of it.
The red robes and mechanization of a Tech-priest of the Adeptus Mechanicus.

…

Emperor on Earth, they really /are/ still mad about the Flamer Incident, aren't they?!

…

No, that can't be it.

You look at Alirye, Alirye looks at you, and...

Neither of you does anything. Alirye, after a moment, whispers, “Do we run? Hide? Call out to them?” She pauses, and one of her ears twitches a little. “I think there's five. Maybe six?”

>ROLL D100 TO SEE HOW YOUR LUCK IS

[spoiler
]>>38177859
Tell ya what- you critfail this, and the Techpriestess will also be a catgirl. Fair enough?
[/spoiler]

Rolled 97 (1d100)

>>38177968

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Rolled 38 (1d100)

>>38177968

Dice Gods a shit

A SHIT

Rolled 54 (1d100)

>>38177968

>>38177976
Damn... When emperor doesn't want cat mutants he really doesn't want cat mutants!

>>38177976
Is this a crit-fail? I hope it's a crit-fail.

>>38177976
Is this close enough? Robot kitty ears, at least?

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>>38178007

Anon, this is a roll-low system. A 1 is a crit success, a 100 is a crit failure.

>>38177948
I'd prefer a mechanical tail-drill tbh.

>>38178021
roll under anon.

>>38177997
this is decent

>>38178033
Really? I thought this just mocked 40k not followed its traditional dice system. jesus christ on a pogo stick.

>>38178007
OK next roll can be for a cat boy, then some kind of bird thing, is that ok anon?

>>38178060
>some kind of bird thing
PURGE!

>>38178060

>Bird thing

I'm on to you, you fucking Chaos-fellating Tzeentch cultist.

Should there be a vote for if the tech-priest is also a felinid instead of a tech-priest?

>>38177968
>messing up a spoiler
Kill me.

>>38177976
>>38177997
>>38177999
>38 and an almost-critfail

>>38178007
>>38178014
>>38178021
I feel like I should cut you a deal.
At the same time, I feel like I shouldn't.

How about this- if you take the 54 instead of the 38, catgirl techpriestess will be a thing.

Deal?
>YES
>NO
>Esper pls

>>38178103
>NO
We don't need to stack the fetishes.

>>38178060
>then some kind of bird thing
A Living Saint? B-but anon, I don't think we're worthy enough...

>>38178103
>YES
I wonder what the last option does.

>>38178103
>NO

I can live without. besides at this rate you'll throw a slaanesh cultist at us with cat ears.

I wanna see what fireworks that sets off

>>38178103
>NO

Rolled 2 (1d2)

>>38178103
>Esper plz
1= YES
2= NO

>>38178103

>YES

>>38178127
>I wonder what the last option does.
It's the bird thing anon.

>>38178103
Not voting. I can take or leave catgirls

>>38178103

>YES

Every day we'll wake up to a disassembled toaster or the likes. Cybernetic murder presents.

>>38178103
>>Esper pls
>YES

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>>38178103

>YES

Oh my.

>>38178163
>Lots of constatnly-repaired cybernetic mice running around.

>>38178103
>YES

Hmm, if we stack the fetishes now, that means it's less likely we'll encounter a felinid later. However, that also means less work for the QM.

>>38178199

>Constantly referring to the Omnnyassiah and not realizing she's messing it up, replacing her vocal cords does nothing to solve the problem

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>>38178118
>>38178129
>>38178134
>>38178143
NO

>>38178127
>>38178144
>>38178163
>>38178192
>>38178198
>>38178209
>Omnyassiah be praised!


Oh Emprah. That come-from-behind victory.

>>38178103
But I wanted the catgirl to be a Guards woman..

>>38178218
A catgirl tech-pristess in hand is worth two in the bush. Killing two birds with one stone here.

>>38178331
A part of us all did. However, a catgirl tech-priest might be more enjoyable.

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>>38178331
Bellatrix will never meet her. You lose.

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>>38178331

Maybe she'll be the techpriestess' ex-neighbor or something and she's recruitable down the line. Who knows?

>>38178581
I want cats to leave. This is America, damnit!

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>>38178633

It's infectious. Run.

>>38178581
Recruitable into what?

>>38178748
For all we know, this Nekomaton could be our eternal arch-rival.

“Seven, actually,” says a voice from behind you, “there are /seven/ of us.”

Frak. At least that didn't give you a heart attack. That would have been an embarrassing way to go.

“Turn around then,” the voice, feminine (but also ever-so-slightly... tinny?) says. “Nice and slow, now. No funny business.”

You do as she says, as does Alirye.

…

What.

The woman before you is clad in the bright red robes of a Techpriest. She's just shapely enough that you can tell she's female beneath those robes, and her mechadendrites are all moving at the same time- each in a different direction and at a different speed (which is really odd to see).

But that's not what gives you pause.

No.

That'd be her apparently-unaugmented face (which is pretty, to be fair- it's just not something you'd expect) and, more strangely, her ears.

You've never seen ears like these.

Well, you /have/.
But they were on a cat.

These are the same sort of ears.

Just... on a lady.

…

You can't help but think they make her that much cuter.

“I am Magos Aila Velence,” she says.

[What does she say next?]
>“... and I've been expecting you.”
>“... who in the Omnyassiah's name are /you/?”
>“... and you must be the two the Inquisitor promised us.”
>“... Tell me, have either of you ever heard of 'Necrons,' by chance?”
>“... and you'll come with me- if you want to live.”
>Something else? (Write-in!)

>>38178929
>“... and you'll come with me- if you want to live.”
Sure.

>“... who in the Omnyassiah's name are /you/?”

>>38178929
>“... Tell me, have either of you ever heard of 'Nyecrons,' by chance?”

>>38178929
>>“... who in the Omnyassiah's name are /you/?”

>>38178929
>"BLOOD FOR THE BLOOD G- I mean, how was your day?"

>>38178929
>“... Tell me, have either of you ever heard of 'Necrons,' by chance?”
Are they a kind of sandwich?

>>38178929
>Something else? (Write-in!)
And you're Nyat supposed to be here! This is just purrfect you've thrown all my tyime tables off! Nya!

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>I actually typed "Omnyassiah"
FREEEEEEEEEEEUD

>>38178929
>>38179112
Seconding!

>>38178929
"An Eldar!? I've never gotten to dissect one of THOSE before!"

>>38178929
>she tazes us both.

>>38178929
>"What do your guts look like? I can't wait to find out! Please, by all means, go ahead and squirm. MAKE IT FUN, NYAHAHAHA!"

>>38178929
You never said what kind of cat. Maine Coon right? Right?!

>>38178929
>“... and you must be the two the Inquisitor promised us.”

>>38178929
>You're ears.. are so.. weird.. can I touch them, nya?

>>38179308
>Maine Coon
Top tier taste, anon. Love my Maine coon to death, the fluffy little bastard.

>>38178993
COME WITH ME IF YOU WANT TO LIVE

>>38178997
>>38179015
Who are you?

>>38178998
>>38179104
Did somebody say NECRONS?

>>38179312
We had a deal!

>>38179102
>>38179112
>>38179130
>>38179179
>>38179214
>>38179279
>>38179427
>Some sort of silly write-in

...

Okay.

Let's, uh, let's try this again.
But 98% more directly.
Okay, pick one option from both lists

>She's a Magos Biologis (or is it a Genetor?) working on genetic modificaiton stuff
>She's a 'normal' Magos, looking for an STC
>She's a Magos poking her head into Necron shenanigans
>She's a Magos Biologis poking her head into Necron shenanigans
>Something else? (Write-in)

AND

>This is legitimately about the Flamer Incident. You done goofed.
>The Inquisitor dropped the two of you off here as part of a deal.
>The two of you are a pleasant surprise.
>You were expected, for reasons
>Something else? (Write-in!)

>>38178929
>“... who in the Omnyassiah's name are /you/?”

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=arZdeg_fL-I

>>38179524
>>She's a Magos Biologis poking her head into Necron shenanigans
>You were expected, for reasons

>>38179524
>She's a Magos Biologis (or is it a Genetor?) working on genetic modificaiton stuff
She'll give us cat ears!

>The two of you are a pleasant surprise.

>>38179524
>She's a Magos Biologis poking her head into Necron shenanigans
>This is legitimately about the Flamer Incident

>>38179524
>She's a Magos poking her head into Necron shenanigans
>The two of you are a pleasant surprise.

>>38179524
Explorator Magos Biologis looking for an STC

>The Inquisitor dropped the two of you off here as part of a deal.

>>38179524
>She's not a real Magos, she just wants to impres us.
>The Inquisitor dropped the two of you off here as part of a deal.

>>38179524
>She's a Magos Biologis (or is it a Genetor?) working on genetic modificaiton stuff
>The two of you are a pleasant surprise.
We shall never know what the flamer incident actually entailed, but it will haunt us for the rest of the quest.

>>38179524
>She's a Magos Biologis (or is it a Genetor?) working on genetic modificaiton stuff
>This is legitimately about the Flamer Incident. You done goofed.

An STC might be able to save the Emperor!

>>38179570
>She'll give us cat ears!
But I like being the way we are!

>>38179570
>She'll give us cat ears!
In that case...
>>38179524
>>She's a Magos poking her head into Necron shenanigans

>>The Inquisitor dropped the two of you off here as part of a deal.

>>38179565
>>38179606
Biologis + Necrons

>>38179570
>>38179620
>>38179647
>Biologis + SCIENCE

>>38179607
>>38179857
Magos + Necrons

>>38179616
Biologis + STC

Biologis gene modification!


>>38179565
'Cause reasons

>>38179647
>>38179606
The flamer Incident will never be forgotten

>>38179570
>>38179607
>>38179620
>Surprise!

>>38179616
>>38179618
>>38179857
>It was a deal!

...

The Inquisitor surprised them with a deal?
I... uh. I'll figure it out.
Maybe she's surprised that he held up his end of the bargain?

Hmm.

Writing!

>>38179952
Damnit, why do you have to split up votes with shit like "Magos looking for Necrons" and "Biologis looking for Necrons"? Just give us occupation and objective votes seperately. Jeez!

>>38180034
Because two options was too much in the first place!

>4 votes for necrons

Oh.

I see the reason for the compaint, then.
So it'd be Biologis + Necrons, then.

I can work with that.

See, this is why criticism and feedback are good things!
Because you have eyeballs that I don't!

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>>38179952
>I... uh. I'll figure it out.

>>38180115
Nah, you already fucked up. It's
>Biologis + SCIENCE
now.

>>38179952
>The Inquisitor surprised them with a deal?
>I... uh. I'll figure it out.
>Maybe she's surprised that he held up his end of the bargain?
>Hmm.
>Writing!
Just flip a coin and get on with it for crying out loud!

>>38179451
Fuck. Now I really want Nekopara Vol.2 right fucking now.

>>38180296
She's suprised as noone told the abhuman.

>>38180334
Okay. Aren't all tech-priests abhumans, though?

>>38180377
No, abhumans are things like Ratlings and Ogrins.

“And, as much as I'd like to say something like “I've been expecting you,” I must admit that the two of you being here is... a pleasant surprise. I half-expected to be repaid with an Exterminatus, but he held up his end of the bargain...” She smiles. “You know, you'd never realize how valuable the unaugmented are until the time comes where you need them.”

“And what is it that you need 'them' for, exactly?” Alirye asks.

The techpriestess grins. “Guess.”

You can almost hear Alirye cringing. “I... I don't think I want to.”

“How boring. What about you, then?” She asks, speaking to you this time.

You think for a few moments, then answer, “To pass through a metal detector?”

She laughs, shaking her head. “No. But I'll give you a hint.”

>The hint is NECRONS.
>The hint is GENETICS.
>The hint is STANDARD TEMPLATE CONSTRUCT.
>The hint is... something else? (Write-in!)

>>38180467
>The hint is NYECRONS.

>>38180467
>The hint is NYEHCRONS.

>>38180501
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0TL5Qke3e54

>>38180467
>The hint is NECRONS.
Sounds good.

>>38180467
>>The hint is NECRONS.

>>38180467
>The hint is... To pass the moving red dot in the field of catnip.

>>38180467
>The hint is NECRONS.

>>38180551
She's gonna short circuit!

Hey, did you know that when Eldars get intimate, CRYSTALS EVERYWHERE!?

>>38180467
Ear scratches?

>>38180713
That techpriest was high as fuck when he wrote that shit.

>>38180501
>>38180513
>>38180537
>>38180538
>>38180555
>Necrons!
>Meow.

>>38180551
Laser-pointer operation.
It's a two-man job.

Okay, writing!
If only I could figure out why I associate Necrons and Steve Jobs with one another.

>>38180766
Legions of soulless automatons?

>>38180626
If I can't stop them letting some abhuman hold the rank of Magos I will get them high and send in the sniper.
And I would of gotten away with it if that Inquisitor had sent an Exterminatus insted of a medaling battle sister and her xeno bitch.

File: joffrey clapping.gif (333 KB, 500x281)

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>>38180832
kek

>>38180766
>Laser-pointer operation.
>It's a two-man job.
Why don't she just get a servo-skull?

You nod. “Okay. Hit me. I'm ready.”

“Ooh, I like the enthusiasm.” She glances over at Alirye. “Your Eldar friend doesn't seem to be too peppy, though...” She clicks her tongue. “Anyways, the hint is 'Necrons.' Got it?”

… Necrons? What in the Emperor's name is a Necron?

You blink. “Not at all!”

“Hmm. I suspected as much. What about you, Eldar?”

Alirye blows a raspberry at her. “I'm hoping they kill you first. So I can watch and laugh.”

You give your pointy-eared companion a Look. “There's no reason to be rude, Alirye.”

“You're only saying that because you don't know what a Necron is.”

The Techpriestess laughs again. “We've come up with a way to replicate their necrodermis- in purely organic beings.” One of her kitty-ears twitches. “And now we have two purely organic beings here to test it on.” Her ear twitches again... you wanna scratch those ears. “Any questions?”

>Ask for an explanation of what those things she was talking about are.
>Ask if you can scratch her ears.
>Ask why she didn't have those scary-quite Tech Guard guys that are standing behind you shoot Alirye on sight.
>Ask if you're gonna die.
>Ask if this 'necrodermis' thing is good for your skin.
>Ask some other silly question. (Write-in!)


>>38180832
... maybe? I dunno.

>>38181086
Servo-skulls aren't pretty ladies, anon.

>>38181155
>>Ask for an explanation of what those things she was talking about are.
>Ask if you can scratch her ears.
>Ask if this 'necrodermis' thing is good for your skin.

>>38181155
>>38181183 is good.

>>38181155
>Ask for an explanation of what those things she was talking about are.
>Ask if you're gonna die.
>Ask if this 'necrodermis' thing is good for your skin.

>Try to resist urge to pet the cat.
>Pet the cat a lot.

>>38181155
>Ask for an explanation of what those things she was talking about are.
>Ask if you can scratch her ears.
>Ask if you're gonna die.

We're gonna get pinched by her mecha-dendrite, aren't we?

>>38181155
>Ask for an explanation of what those things she was talking about are.

>Ask her if she can give you better tech for purging the emperor's enemies

>Ask her if you can scratch her ears

>>38181259
The Emperor protects, anon.
And power armor is also pretty good.

>>38181155
>TEST SUBJECTS!?
>Forcefully start rubbing her ears for her arrogance.

>>38181155
>>38181254
Backing!

>>38181155
>Ask for an explanation of what those things she was talking about are.

Looks like ear-scratching and explanation are shoe-ins.

>>38181183
>>38181238
>>38181239
>Gotta take care of your skin!

>>38181239
>>38181254
>>38181414
>Is this the "you'll die" sort of need?

>>38181325
>>38181278
Write-ins

>>38181440
Anon is a master of restraint!

Okay, writing!

>>38181155
>>Ask if you can scratch her ears.

“I have so many questions that it's almost embarrassing.”

The Techpriestess- Aila, was it?- gives you a wry smile. “Ask away.”

“What are Necrons?”

“Ancient scary murder-machines that look like metal skeletons, have extremely advanced technology, and are a pain in the cyber-mantle to kill.”

“Okay,” you say. Soulless automatons with fancy guns. Got it. “What's necrodermis?”

“Some call it 'living metal.' It's part of the reason Necrons are so tough. It's very strong, and capable of self-repair. It's fascinating, to say the least.”

“Alright...” you frown. “Is this thing you're talking about gonna kill us?”

Alirye laughs. “Almost certainly.”

Aila shoots her a dirty look. “I certainly hope not,” she says. “That would mean that I messed up.”

Well, it's not particularly reassuring, but at least it wasn't a 'yes.'

“Okay, if it's not gonna kill us, will it be bad for our skin?” You shoot a sidelong glance at Alirye, who seems to be unsure whether she should be laughing or crying.

Aila gives you a blank look. “... Look, sister, I'm gonna level with you- I haven't the slightest frakking clue what it's gonna do to your skin.”

You grimace. “Geez. That's important, you know?” You shake your head. “Have you ever worn powered armor with dry skin?” You shudder. Never again.

She shrugs. “Sorry. Bigger fish to fry and all that. Anything else?”

…

Her ear twitches again.

“Can- can I...”

She blinks. “Yes?”

“Can I scratch your ears?”

…

>ROLL D100 TO CHARM HER METAPHORICAL PANTS OFF!

Rolled 61 (1d100)

>>38181944

Rolled 86 (1d100)

>>38181944
Touch fluffy ears.

Rolled 92 (1d100)

>>38181944
nat 1

Rolled 53 (1d100)

>>38181944

>>38181976
>>38181985
>>38181988
>61

Oooh. Just barely.

Writing!

>>38182021
Man, she must be easy.

>>38182126
She was at a -20 for her ear already itching, and you got her warmed up enough to you to get a +10. In effect, a +30 for you

When are we going to get to burn heretics and spread faith?

>>38182483
Soon anon....Soon....

>>38182483
This. I like catgirls and lesbian undertones just as much as the next guy, but c'mon, this is a WH40K quest. We are the emperor's chosen double x chromosome warriors and it's time we spread faith and melt the heretics, xenos and assorted chaos spawns away.

Her cheeks redden, and, after a brief pause, she nods. “Okay... but only a little, alright?”

Yesss.

You bring your ungauntleted left hand (it's an old trick Sister Superior Praetia taught you- sleeping with one hand unarmored gives you something to rest your head on during the night; leaving your dominant hand armored means you can still fire your weapon if things go south) up to Aila's head, with its fluffy hair and fluffy kitty-cat ears, and you begin to scratch.

…

It's soft~! Softer than the softest soft thing at the soft thing manufactorum!

You scratch and stroke her hair and ears, appreciating how soft and fluffy they are, and, to your surprise, the cat-eared Tech-priestess begins... purring. She presses her head against your hand and squeezes her eyes shut. Her mechadendrites wrap around her midsection in some sort of bizarre Tech-priest self-hug.

… This is amazing. You can't keep something this great all to yourself. “Ali, come feel this.”

You can practically feel the eldar rolling her eyes as she steps forward and places her hand on the fluffy softness. “Isha's left tit,” she murmurs, even as she joins you in rubbing the everliving hell out of Aila's head.

The Tech-priestess' purring grows louder and louder, until, eventually, one of the Skitarii clears his throat. “Magos Velence,” he says, in a voice that sounds like it's coming through a vox, “If there's nothing else, we would be wise to return to base.”

“R-right,” Aila replies, her voice wavering and colored by embarrassment.

>Keep petting her. You can't stop! Your hand is moving on its own!
>Relent. You should probably get the scary living-metal thingie over with.
>Something else? (Write-in!)

>>38182579
>>Keep petting her. You can't stop! Your hand is moving on its own!

>>38182579
>Keep petting her. You can't stop! Your hand is moving on its own!
one ticket for the taze train, plz

>>38182579
>Keep petting her. You can't stop! Your hand is moving on its own!
[petting intensifies]

>>38182579
>Relent. You should probably get the scary living-metal thingie over with

Also, I'm assuming we'll follow them to the base. In that case, go bug them about power armour/weapon upgrades. New and/or improved tech means more firepower for the emprah!

>>38182579
>>Relent. You should probably get the scary living-metal thingie over with.
Think of it like this. This is a taste of what she could get if the necrodermis right, she get ear scratches from a metal hand so its win-win for a catgirl and a techpriest.

>>38182579
>Keep petting her. You can't stop! Your hand is moving on its own!
>Keep your hand armored. It is a well known fact that normal terran felines will often look cute and cuddly to draw in their prey before attacking them.

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>>38182579
>Keep petting her. You can't stop! Your hand is moving on its own!

>>38182664
She's just gonna taze us through the metal armor if we go the uncomfortable route.

>>38182686
Watch us roll a one for a Toughness test and keep petting her

For some reason, I think this quest is promoting an Ear Fetish in many anons.
here ya go ya filthy animals https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6cjyYu1A8vI

>>38182601
>>38182632
>>38182642
>>38182664
>>38182684
>PATS FOR THE PAT GOD

>>38182661
>>38182662
Mercy for the Cat-priestess

Okay!

Roll D100 for reasons!

Rolled 90 (1d100)

>>38182853

Rolled 100 (1d100)

>>38182853
We should focus on the mission ahead. Too much distraction is unworthy of the sororitas! Stop patting, get shit done.

oh god empra...

>>38182876
oy vey

Rolled 82 (1d100)

>>38182876
Well fuck

So many lucky rolls for roll over here.

...

>>38182876
aw yiss

>>38182876
RIP in fucking pieces

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>>38182876
Yesss.
Let the grump flow through you...

>>38182871
>>38182901
>>38182876
>Critical FAILURE

... I'm gonna take a few minutes to retrieve my sides from orbit, then get to writing.

>>38182733
Anon, you're not a very good psyker. Don't quit your day-job.

>>38182876
>Suddenly, lust gets the better of them and both Bellatrix and Alirye get possessed by Catgirl-loving Daemonettes, ushering in a new age of darkness and moaning for this world.

>>38182871
>>38182876
>>38182901
>Those rolls
GET YOUR HEADS IN THE GAME

Rolled 20 (1d100)

>>38182853

You keep on petting.

“S-stop,” Aila says, even more meek than before.

You try to stop. You really do.

But... “I... I can't.”

It's so soft and fluffy! You just can't stop-

One of Aila's hands seizes your unprotected wrist. The last thing you see before darkness rushes in is an electric blue glow coming from a pattern on the back of the Tech-priestess' hand.

…

…

When you come to, you're...

…

Where the hell are you?

… Somewhere spooky.

You're in a metal room filled with all sorts of machines and cogitators, sitting on a raised dais that runs along the lip of a big vat-thing. The coldness of the floor on your bum is what first indicates to you that you're no longer clad in your armor- the only thing between you and the elements (and cold floors!) right now is the skin-tight jumpsuit you were wearing underneath your metal second skin.

The vat-thing is filled with what you can only describe as black goop, and, upon further inspection, you seem to be confined to the platform by a big cage-thing that extends upwards from the fence lining the edge of the platform itself.

There's no fence, you note, between yourself and the vat of goop.

…

A voice crackles over a loudspeaker- it's so vox-distorted that you can't tell who it belongs to, or even what the person speaking might sound like. “Okay, Curis. Hop in the vat.”

…

>“Uh... no?”
>“... 'Kay.”
>“What the frak?”
>“... Why?”
>Something else? (Write-in!)

>>38183540
>“... Why?”
>Something else? (Write-in!)
"Where in the Emperor's light is the Eldar."

>>38183540
>“... Why?”

>>38183540
>“What the frak?”
>“Uh... no?”
then
>“... Why?”

>>38183540
>“... 'Kay.”
When a servant of the Emperor requests something of us, it is our sworn duty to obey without question!

>>38183540
>Who are you, where am I, who is the Eldar, and what in the Emperor's light is going on?!

I told you guys we should have stopped petting.

>>38183639
>IMPERATOR VULT!

>>38183670
>who is the Eldar
Sorry, meant "where is the Eldar"

>>38183578
>>38183592
>>38183625
>>38183670
C'monnn guys, can we play as an unquestioning zealot for at least one action? We're not going to make it as a Battle-Sister at this rate. Besides, Necrodermis seems cool.

>>38183701
wat is an eldar?

>>38183745
Ehh.. just cause someone's an Imperial servant doesn't mean they can order us around or have us jump into vats full of black goop.

>>38183745
>an unquestioning zealot
She wants to put Xenotech in us. A zealot would have shot her on the spot, and would certainly NOT just be okay with it.

>>38183879
Sounds like someone doesn't have enough faith in humanity.

>>38183891
Let's just compromise by dipping a toe, then a leg in.

>>38183914
How about no.

>>38183578
>>38183592
>>38183625
>Why?

>>38183578
>>38183670
Where'd you guys put my elf? Geez.

>>38183639
>>38183674
AYE AYE, CAP'N!

Okay, writing!

Are we purging things yet?

>>38184263
No.

Your first response is to blurt out a half-dozen questions, some of which, it could be argued, are only tangentially-related to the situation at hand.

Questions like “Who the frak are you?” and “Where'd you put my Eldar?” and “What the [REDACTED]?” and “Is this about the Flamer Incident? How many times do I have to apologize?!”

You spend perhaps ninety seconds 'ranting' your questions, and, after you've finished- and been left in silence for a bit- the speaker crackles again. “... What was that about a flamer?”

“Nothing at all,” you lie, “in fact, I don't know what you're talking about? What's a flamer?”

“... I'll do us all a favor and 'forget' to look into that.”

You blink, taken a bit aback. “... really?”

“Yep.”

“Thanks, Mister-or-Misses-speaker-I-can't-see!”

“Eh. Don't mention it.” There's a pause. “Also, hop in the vat.”

“... Why?”

“The Necrodermis thing. Didn't the Magos tell you? Omnissiah's shiny adamantium balls! You give the Cat one job, and what does she do? Whatever she wants!”

You peer more closely at the goop. “... This is that necrodermis stuff, then?”

“... It's not that simple, but, in a sense, yes.”

“So... I just hop in... and we're done?”

“... Ideally, you'd be 'done' after climbing back out of the vat via the ladder, but, again, the answer is -essentially- 'yes'.”

You squint at the goop. “... Are you sure you don't have some heretics I could purge instead?”

“Get in the vat, Curis.”

>Do it. Get in the vat.
>... Why'd he not answer your question? THAT'S AN EARLY INDICATOR OF HERESY!
>Refuse. That stuff looks gross and maybe-dangerous.
>Stall. Try to make small talk or something!
>Something else? (Write-in!)

>>38184396
>Do it. Get in the vat.

>>38184263
>>38184312
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=F_4pXusde8s

>>38184396
>Dip a leg.

>>38184396
>>... Why'd he not answer your question? THAT'S AN EARLY INDICATOR OF HERESY!
>Stall. Try to make small talk or something!
Use small talk to get a bead on his heresy and then bash him over the head with a prayer, and your fists.

>>38184396
>>... Why'd he not answer your question? THAT'S AN EARLY INDICATOR OF HERESY!

>>38184396
>>... Why'd he not answer your question? THAT'S AN EARLY INDICATOR OF HERESY!

>>38184396
>... Why'd he not answer your question? THAT'S AN EARLY INDICATOR OF HERESY!
SCOURGE AND PURGE

>>38184396
>... Why'd he not answer your question? THAT'S AN EARLY INDICATOR OF HERESY!
"Answer my questions or I fall back on my basic training: break shit. Piss me off and I'll move on to my advanced training, which is the same as the basic training only I'll set everything on fire after."

>>38184531
>only I'll set everything on fire after."
Not setting shit on fire before, during and after we break stuff.

>>38184396
>... Why'd he not answer your question? THAT'S AN EARLY INDICATOR OF HERESY!
Who the heck do these "techpriests" think they are, trying to command a SoB around like that?
...is what I'd like to say but we're out of weapons, power armour and places to go for purging. Just jump in, Emperor will guide us etc.

>>38184566
It hurts your fists if you set it on fire before.

>>38184605
If you want to jump in instead of accusing him of heresy, you should vote for jumping in. Your vote is contradicted by your other words, and things like that make it much more difficult to tally votes.

>>38184396
>"If you let me go I'll let you press your face against my boobs?"

>>38184607
It's not pain! It's the glorious feeling of PURGING THE MOST FOUL OF HERETICS! With fire I might add.

Let's just jump in and have faith in the Emperor.

>>38184665
Sorry, I was going on about how HERESY would be my favoured joice but under these circumstances it isn't. So to make it absolutely clear:
>Jump into the goo. FOR THE EMPRAH

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>>38184416
>>38184428
>>38184718
Go on in! The goo's fine!

>>38184446
>>38184455
>>38184472
>>38184501
>>38184531
>pic related

Okay!

>Once again, ROLL D100 (it's to discern heresy this time, though)

Rolled 76 (1d100)

>>38184818
nat 100

Rolled 30 (1d100)

>>38184818
EMPEROR DO NOT FORSAKE ME

Rolled 12 (1d100)

>>38184818

>>38184858
Yup heresy.

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>>38184831
>>38184855
>>38184858
>12
Good job, anon.
Heresy detected!

Rolled 70 (1d100)

>>38184818
Does OP only count the first roll? Or best roll? Or worst? Anyway, rolling for HERESY

>>38184897
Don't you mean that we successfully ascertained that there's no heresy to be found here?

>>38184976

DOUBLE HERESY!

>>38184976
"The plea of innocence is guilty of WASTING MY TIME."
-Confessor, Dawn of War: Soulstorm

Heresy is found wherever you look for it, anon.

>>38184818
Seems like Heresy front to back. Kidnapping a Sister of Battle to experiment on? Heresy. Reverse-engineering Necron tech? Also heresy. Employing a felinid as a Magos? Borderline at best, Heresy at worst. Stripping a Sister of Battle? Stripping a Sister of Battle of her armor? Hot, but still Heresy. Forcing said Sister of Battle to swim in xenotech goo? Heresy.

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>>38185053
>Hot, but still Heresy.

You grimace. Something's not right, here.

“... Are you being evasive, Tech-priest?” You growl. The thought of someone blaspheming the Emperor's name nearly sends you into a frenzy of its own accord. You restrain yourself, however, so that you might more clearly ascertain the nature of whatever betrayal might fester here.

“... Negative.”

…

You offer a prayer to the Emperor, asking for guidance through this darkness- through the fog of heresy and deceit.

“These 'Necrons'- are they xenos?”

The vox itself seems to crackle and pop nervously. “... Well-”

You take hold of the cage confining you and jerk it back and forth, rattling the whole construction. “ARE. THEY. XENOS?”

There's a long pause. “Yes.”

You narrow your eyes. “So, by working with this 'necrodermis,' you are committing tech-heresy, are you not?”

“That's not-”

>“RELEASE ME, THAT I MAY GRACE YOU WITH THE EMPEROR'S JUDGEMENT!”
>“ONLY A HERETIC NEEDS TO JUSTIFY HIS HERESIES!”
>“ARE YOU USING XENOS TECHNOLOGY, OR NOT?!”
>Attempt to escape the cage. FOR THE EMPEROR!
>Something else? (Write-in!)

>>38185428
>>“ARE YOU USING XENOS TECHNOLOGY, OR NOT?!”
>Attempt to escape the cage. FOR THE EMPEROR!
Time to ignite our murder femboner.

>>38185428
>>“RELEASE ME, THAT I MAY GRACE YOU WITH THE EMPEROR'S JUDGEMENT!”
>Attempt to escape the cage. FOR THE EMPEROR!
PURGE THE HERETICS!

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>>38185428
Engage murder femboner, and acquire best elfdar.

>>38185428
>“ARE YOU USING XENOS TECHNOLOGY, OR NOT?!”
>Attempt to escape the cage. FOR THE EMPEROR!

>>38185477
I REQUIRE FURTHER DATA TO RENDER A JUDGEMENT.

>>38185428
>“RELEASE ME, THAT I MAY GRACE YOU WITH THE EMPEROR'S JUDGEMENT!”
Oh boy, the Tech priests are going to be talking about this for years.

>>38185428
>Attempt to escape the cage. FOR THE EMPEROR!
PURGE. PURGE. PURGE.

>>38185460
>>38185508
THESE! PURGE THE HERETIC! [Spoiler]SNATCH AWAY THE ELDAR CHICK AND COMMIT EXTRA HERESY

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>>38185503
F-for the emprah...

>>38185428
>“ARE YOU USING XENOS TECHNOLOGY, OR NOT?!”
>Attempt to escape the cage. FOR THE EMPEROR!

>>38185477
I ALSO REQUIRE MORE DATA FOR....UH SCIENCE!

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>>38185563

>>38185428
>Attempt to escape the cage. FOR THE EMPEROR!

-The Heretic and blasphemer can offer no excuse for their crimes. Those who are pardoned merely live to further shroud humanity from the light of the Emperor with the darkness of their souls-

There will be no mercy... Except for cat Magos because those ears.

Time for the Cold Wind and the Warm Sun strategy!

>>38185428
>"Okay. Jumping into the vat now!"
>"Gotta disrobe to get all the juices, right?"
>"You peek, you burn."
>Throw shoes and clothes into the vat.
>Climb down to ladder.
>"Done!"

>>38185636
right we were already naked and our clothes is our armor...we need that

>>38185563
>>38185599
INSUFFICIENT DATA!

>>38185477
These asses are poorly drawn.

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>>38185681

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>>38185681
>>38185706
well I did not draw them

>>38185428
>>“ONLY A HERETIC NEEDS TO JUSTIFY HIS HERESIES!”

>>38185730
>>38185743
>>38185778
i thought this was a fucking Quest Thread

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>>38185681
>>38178060
>>38178078
>>38178094

>>38185449
>>38185478
>>38185574
>>38185818

Heresy?

>>38185460
>>38185508
RELEASE ME!

>>38185449
>>38185460
>>38185478
>>38185515
>>38185574
>>38185601
>ESCAPE!

>>38185819
>Samus
>Bird thing
Mine compatriat of african descent

Okay, roll some of those hundred-sided dice to try and escape!

Rolled 11 (1d100)

>>38185901

Rolled 71 (1d100)

>>38185901
RELEASE!

Rolled 96 (1d100)

>>38185901

Rolled 43 (1d100)

>>38185901

Rolled 71 (1d100)

>>38185901
>Escaping from heretics
>not purging them

>>38185959
We have no weapons or armor, anon.

>>38185916
>>38185931
>>38185939
>11

... That's also the time.
I guess we started late today, didn't we?

I really need to get to bed- I think we'll call it a day, and pick up here next time.

Sorry for the sudden-ness.

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>>38185818
Ssssshhhhh.....

>>38186034
A'ight then
See you next time

>>38186001
We have the blazing fury of the emperors chosen. that is enough.

>implying we cant beat up a bunch of coghead nerds.

>>38186034
C'mon, just one post to wrap things up for now?

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Thanks for playing! I'll try to run again this weekend!

Twitter: https://twitter.com/EsperQuestQM
THE LAND OF ASKING: ask.fm/EsperQuestQM

Archives:
http://suptg.thisisnotatrueending.com/archive.html?tags=Battle-Sister%20Quest

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>>38185477
>>38185563
>>38185599
>>38185819
>>38186037
>>38186612
>>38186627
>>38186661

mmmmmm.....myes, we must have more sexy sisters. F-for research. Yes, research.