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/tg/ - Traditional Games


What was life like in Soviet Russia, /tg/? More specifically, in 1947. What was life as a civilian like? What did people eat? How did law enforcement operate? What sort of gun laws did they have? Did they still have rationing?
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>>39444234
I'm mostly bumping your thread til a better historian comes along but...

Keep in mind USSR was gigantic and varied, moreso than all the states in USA. If you were a member of the intelligentsia in Moscow you could have a much nicer life than a farmer in Ukraine.
>guns
I believe you could own hunting arms if you lived out in the middle of nowhere.

Now that I think of it, I have no idea how daily life operated. I think you got a salary in rubles and also had to stand in line for some centrally distributed commodities.
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>>39444395
The game will be in a fictional city in actual Russia, that got attacked by the Nazi's during Barbossa. It's in a forested area, although I haven't decided on a exact area it'll be geographically.
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Bump
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>>39445343
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>>39445397
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>>39444234
You should try
>>>/int/
OP.
They will be more than happy to give you all the lurid details.
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>>39444234
honestly, it wasn't that bad, it's wasn't great, but it wasn't that bad.
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>>39446165
Unless he's lucky, he's just gonna find eastern european butthurt all over the place.
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>>39444234
Take this as sample of socialist humour and try to infer under which circumstances people would come up with them and find them funny.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Radio_Yerevan_jokes
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>>39446216
That's good. Something to offset imperialfag nostalgia googles.
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>>39446274
>http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Radio_Yerevan_jokes

The Armenian Radio was asked: "Has poet Mayakovsky committed suicide?"
The Armenian Radio answered: "We don't know, but his last words were Don't shoot, comrades!".
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>>39444716
In that case, all of the large cities were occupied, and places like Odessa and Kiev held out in siege-like conditions for a while before being eventually conquered. Though many of them were also captured largely intact, as the Germans wanted their industry.

But the overall landscape would also be devastated to one degree or another by war. The Soviets would probably be ruthlessly reestablishing themselves in areas where the population was less than happy with being rules by Stalin, as well. But overall the war with Germany galvanized the Russians in a way few things ever have, anyone who was a veteran of the war (ie: most men) was respected, especially if they were a highly decorated one. While the name "The Great Patriotic War" might have originated from propaganda, it really did become one in the end (when it became evident that the Nazis wanted to kill most of the Russian people).

But as I was saying, the land would be devastated to quite a degree, and while they may have been receiving food shipments from the Allies to alleviate things, I'm not sure how well that food got around.

>mfw I'm imagining you playing Call of Cthulhu campaign
>mfw I want to command a T-34 that's fighting a Shoggoth
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>>39446407
>>39444234
Oh yes, I should also note that every character should know someone who died, statistically speaking.

During WW2 1 in 7 Soviet citizens died, due to war or other causes.
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>>39446274
>>39446350

Top kek. Based armenians.
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>>39444395
One of the big things to keep in mind that inequality was much less in the USSR than in the US at the time. Or in the US now, obviously.

The difference between a farmer and a city-dweller would be noticeable, but the difference between a factory worker and a doctor wouldn't be nearly as much. Pay rates were more-or-less standardized and so a doctor might only make 5-10 times as much as a factory worker.
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>>39446407
>>39446455
It's a Hunter: The Vigil game, actually! But this is some good detail, I'll certainly ask the group who they lost in the War.
They'll certainly encounter Nazi Werewolves who are hiding out in the forest

>>39446635
Noted!
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>>39446768
another thing to note is that the Soviet Union was very, very serious about idealogical purity. You probably wouldn't see it as much in 1947 due to the relative youth of the communist movement but later on there were serious issues with catching murderers and other criminals because the soviet union was "a worker's paradise" as far as the party line was concerned crimes like murder simply didn't exist in the soviet union.

so you're probably not gonna want full on thought police but make sure you have some young communisms who are "living the dream" and be completely blind to "small details" like corruption in the party.
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>>39446635
That's not quite true. The inequality was still there, maybe even more pronounced then in the US. It was just High Ranking Party Member > Proletariat worker, as opposed too Rich > Poor.

"In Soviet Russia, everyone is equal. Some people are just more equal then others."
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>>39446941
"Much less" doesn't mean "Gone entirely"

That saying is also so fucking stupid, goddamn my autism.
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>>39446842
Gotcha, I was wondering how murders were handled since obviously so people will get killed by the monsters the PCs are after.
Hmm, having the PCs be members of the police force and being ordered to cover up monster attacks would be interesting.
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>>39447019
honestly depending on who was in charge a lot of police solved murders by hunting down a likely suspect and shooting them in the mouth in their own time. "Child 44" is a good example of what happens when you get a party official who murders people, in this case, children, for kicks but it's set around the late 50s when the communist movement was really entrenched.

if your players are cops they'll have a bit more leeway but a lot of pressure from the top. and since this is 1947 all the people who know the party line is bullshit are probably more willing to question the "worker's paradise" angle since they haven't been gulag'd yet.
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>>39446976
The saying is supposed to be self-contradictory, it's from Animal Farm, where the entire point was that the Pigs (who represented the Communist Party) were massive hypocrites.
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>>39447114
Yes and it's fucking dumb.
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>>39446635

Not true at all.

Base monetary income was more equal across social strata-- but that doesn't mean that people were equal in the slightest.

First, the privileged class was different. If you were in the military, security services, or party hierarchy, then you had a vastly better standard of living. Doctors and engineers didn't make as much because they couldn't sell their services at a market price. You're also not counting the vast slave-labor camps that tens of millions were sent to. Pitchblende was mined more or less by hand by unprotected political prisoners starting a little after this time-- the fact that they died of radiation building the soviet nuclear program was considered win/win (it didn't ramp up of course until later).

And just because you couldn't buy luxuries with money didn't mean you didn't get them. It just meant that they were allocated by the political process. Sure, that summer dacha belonged (in theory) to the State and went with the office, not the official, but in practice it was theirs. The nomenklatura had access to stores and goods that their fellows didn't-- they could buy things that weren't available at any price.

Perqs also emphasized control over people more than material goods. Beria would arrest hot girls and gang-rape them, but even years later it was common practice for senior army officers to keep clerical/admin units filled with attractive women to use as their personal harems.

Remember, in 1947 there was still half a decade of Stalin still ahead, and everyone had already lived through the Terror. Even the communist propaganda admitted the sheer scale of near-random mass murder by the security services. What relief there was came from the realization that they'd come within a hare's breath of something even worse: conquest by the Nazis. It was that close, and millions had died stopping that (joining tens of millions who Stalin had killed for being traitors or class enemies or reactionaries).
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>>39447127

Animal Farm as we know it was blown up by the U.S. as anti-Soviet propaganda, but the basic message about how the politburo usurped power fro the local Soviets is still there.
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>>39446842
>you're probably not gonna want full on thought police

If not there, then where? The KGB killed tens of millions on the basis of rumor, innuendo, anonymous informers, and outright personal score-settling, and were quite literally policing people's thoughts.
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>>39444234
>What was life as a civilian like?
Shit
> What did people eat?
Not much if at all.
>How did law enforcement operate?
VERY WELL
Ever hear about the peasant who asked too many questions, comrade?
>What sort of gun laws did they have? Did they still have rationing?
Bolsheviks were a bunch of gun grabbers, but it was kinda hard to confiscate when a lot of civilians depended on the guns, and when certain political issues kind of made an armed populace a good thing.
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>>39447101
Well, I could certainly move it up a decade, I'm not set on 1947. I just want that paranoia that you could be whisked off if you put a foot wrong, it's just deciding when would be the best time.

>>39447177
Although from what you're saying it doesn't sound like I'd need to move it much.
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>>39447224
yes, but during 1947, when the game is set as noted by OP, the KGB were less active on that sort of front and more concerned with getting the nazis out of russia and keeping the motherland intact so they were more lax on murdering people for bad mouthing stalin or complaining about the weather.

now AFTER the war when they have time to consolidate that's a different story.
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>>39447127
>it's fucking dumb
No it isn't.
It makes complete sense in that context.
Plus, you must be dumb as shit if you think not having inequality is good despite the fact everyone is a pauper.
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>>39447265
move it to the mid fifties after the war and you have the best balance of paranoia and player agency. No nazis (publicly acknowledged ones anyway) to mess with the party's perfect little world, KGB officers whisking people off for getting drunk and bitching about work in a bar just a little too loudly, communist utopia from one end of the USSR to the other with the rest of the world to embrace the communist dream soon.

your werewolf nazis can be survivors who lived because they're part of the SS Occult Division.
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>>39447127

Dumb how? Orwell (a socialist himself) was writing an allegory about what happened in Russia. Before WW2, socialists assumed it was all capitalist propaganda. During the war, Britain was desperate for the alliance and anti-Soviet writers were quietly told to STFU. That's why after the war so many books like that came out-- many had been written long before and the authors had been sitting on them waiting for the Nazis to be defeated.

Look, you may think that the soviets weren't a valid example of socialism, and that's another argument for another day. But the USSR under stalin had flagrant, massive corruption, huge class differences, and a brutally effective thought police. It's incredibly well documented, including by the Soviets themselves even when they were still communist.
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>>39447224
In 1947, the KGB hadn't really established itself on that level among the civilian population.

They were still spending most of their time policing the military.
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>>39447297
He's autistic man, he said so himself. Don't be harsh.
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>>39446350
Radio Yerevan was asked: "Could an atomic bomb destroy our beautiful city?"
Radio Yerevan answered: "In principle, yes. But Moscow is by far a more beautiful city than ours."
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>>39447350
Interesting! I think I'll move in up like that. Nothing like being paranoid about the KGB AND whatever monsters might be hidden in the dark.
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not sure, but there were a lot of women around due to all the men going off to fight in the wars. i don't think this really effected much
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>>39447484

Radio Yerevan was asked: "Can Communism also be in the USA?"
Radio Yerevan answered: "Yes. But who would give us our wheat then?"

Reminder that much of the USSR was kept alive through imported food, because agricultural improvement initiatives were sporadic and badly managed. It was within their grasp to make sure that every farmer at least had a tractor to massively increase production, but because so much of the GDP was on the military, in particular on nuclear weapons development, that it was a large part of what killed the USSR.
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>>39446274
Jesus Christ how a man with balls that big fit into the studio, how were they not disappeared for this?
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>>39447284

The Battle of Berlin, where the Red Army finished crushing the germans once and for all, had ended two years before in 1945. And even before then the NKVD was already very aggressive about arresting anyone suspected of anything that might have been construed as collaboration with the nazis.

1927: Stalin is general secretary, but the old-line bolsheviks are still in power, including Trotsky. That's the year that Stalin exiles Trotsky. Waves of mass killing by the Cheka up to then were targeted at non-communists. After this point, anybody was a potential target and ideological purity couldn't save you. Death (possibly after torture) was by being shot in the head by a local Chekist.

1937: The Great Purge is well underway. Eventually, all of the surviving original Bolshevik leaders except Stalin were executed (Trotsky was the last, in 1940). All the senior military officers as well. Two years later, Stalin allies with the Nazis. Two years after that, the Nazis break their agreement and invade (and very nearly destroy) the USSR. Cheka now called NKVD. You're more likely to end up in a slave labor camp (the gulag) than being shot out of hand.

1947: The war is over. Stalin has declared the Great Purge over, but that's mostly because people are now utterly subservient to the NKVD (which under Krushchev will be renamed KGB). Death is less random, by now people know the way to survive is to keep your head down and proclaim personal loyalty to Stalin. Also, there was a genuine rise in patriotism for having defeated the nazis.

the tl;dr version of all this is that if you want random violence that is new and scary and visceral and bloody, go w/ 1927. If you want systemized oppression and people battered into submission but still subject to random violence, then 1937. By 1947, it was every bit as bad, but no longer so new or random.
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>>39447371

That's 100% flat-out false.
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>>39447675
>"Last night the Chernobyl Nuclear Powerstation fulfilled the Five Year Plan of heat energy generation in 4 microseconds."
>"Nurse, where're we going?" / "To the morgue."/ "But I haven't died yet!"/ "The doc said 'to the morgue' — to the morgue it is!" / "But what is wrong with me?!" / "The autopsy will show!"
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>>39447908

It's hard for me as an observer to know, so I tend to trust the first statement unless I know something, or someone provides a sauce.
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>>39447888
>no longer so new or random.
Except that in few months/years Stalin will bring the violence back.
The search for traitors in Red Army leadership
The purge of the Jews in the Party
The "doctors conspiracy"

And one thing - the "random violence" was not as random as you think. True, in the end Stalin brought Beria, after the terror started to get out of hand, but he was never shy to "sacrify many, to get the few".
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>>39447484
Radio Yerevan was asked: "Is it true that Stalin was collecting jokes about himself?"
Radio Yerevan answered: "Yes, it's true. He even collected people who were saying them."

Radio Yerevan was asked: "We heard there's meat in Moscow, will it be in Prague as well?"
Radio Yerevan answered: "Yes. The exhibition tours all our brother nations."

Radio Yerevan was asked: "What is the relationship between work and wages in the real socialism?"
Radio Yerevan answered: "The worker pretends to work and the state pretends to pay."

Radio Yerevan was asked: "Is there censorship of media in Soviet Union?"
Radio Yerevan answered: "In principle no, but unfortunately we can't talk about the issue more in depth."

Radio Yerevan was asked: "Can you explain why Canada is exporting so much wheat to our country?"
Radio Yerevan answered: "Yes, catastrophic overproduction of capitalist system is responsible."

Radio Yerevan was asked: "Can a good communist make a good Christian as well?"
Radio Yerevan answered: "In principle yes, but why make one's life twice as difficult?"

Radio Yerevan was asked: "Is it true that russian watches measure time as swiss ones?"
Radio Yerevan answered: "Yes, in fact they measure it even faster than swiss ones."

Radio Yerevan was asked: "Why do we have two newspapers, Pravda (truth) and Izvestija (news) when they are both published by the same Party?"
Radio Yerevan answered: "Because in Pravda there are no news and in Izvestija there is no truth.

Radio Yerevan was asked: "They say that capitalist west is standing on edge of abyss. Where does Soviet Union stand?"
Radio Yerevan answered: "As always, we are one step ahead of the capitalist west."
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>>39447710
Nobody in Armenia ever heard of Radio Yerevan jokes, they were made up elsewhere
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>>39444234
1947 was kinda shit. The war was won yeah. But Ukraine was devastated (it was the bread basket), a third of the population dead, Belaruss had around 50% mortality. Anti-Russian partisans still operating and a massive military to feed and the fear of the next world war around.
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>>39447350
>>39447888

1957: Khrushchev is in power now. The NKVD has been denounced, mostly for its unconscionable attacks on the Party Elite, but implicitly for its attacks on Russians generally (remember even at this point being a non-Russian soviet made you a third class citizen). After a purge of the KGB, the stalinists tried to overthrow a coup; Zhukov supported Khrushchev and it failed. Realizing Zhukov's power, Khrushchev then forced Zhukov into retirement and purged the Army (mostly forced retirements).

So by this point organized purges targeted mostly the nomenklatura (Party, KGB, Army) and took the form of forced retirements. Citizens showing any political dissent were sent to the gulag, but by this point few people dared raise their heads that way.

By this point, the soviets are stable and their system is secure. Not a good period to do a game themed on the Terror. 1947 is better, and 37 or 27 are far, far better IMO.
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>>39447888
Just reading this sends shivers down my spine. And I prefer not to think about there being people around who unironically want this back.
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>>39448235
These period of time mostly compared with the period of almost full static bureaucracy and productive forces, mixed with laziness and apathy (from 67 to 87), followed by very quick and radical regime's changing.
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>>39447936

Vasili Mitrokhin was the KGB archivist from the late 70's until just before the USSR was overthrown. He secretly copied and stored tens of thousands of KGB records as a kind of "secret police" samizdat. During the chaos of the fall of communism, he defected to Britain and brought his archive. The british (and americans) kept the whole thing secret for about seven years, using the records to catch spies, before releasing the notes publicly.

He's written several books with historian Christopher Andrews. "Sword and Shield: A Secret History of the KGB" is his most popular work. It resolves several historical controversies quite definitively. It has several chapters devoted entirely to the Terror, plus several from the same period dealing with related topics. VERY dense material.

There's also Chekisty, by John Dziak; he's a historian, but since it was written during the Cold War there are a few things he got wrong.

"Viktor Suvorov" is the alias of a former GRU spy who defected to Britian; he wrote The Liberators about the invasion of Hungary and Czechoslovakia. He's not as well liked by historians but his information seems very solid and borne out by subsequent revelations.
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>>39448235

Don't worry. You may not prefer to think about them, but they prefer to think about you.

And, yeah, some of the "it was all just american propaganda" / "life under Stalin wasn't so bad" nonsense above suggests that they're right here in this thread with us.
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>>39448573
Life in Russia was (and will be, no matter what Emperor Putin I would say) always quite shitty. People just love compare old and recent, and finding relief in "good old days".
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>>39448621

Which reminds me of a joke from the soviet days:

"How is this year going?"

"About average: better than next year, but not as good as last year. Average."
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>>39448684
Huh. Never heard this one before, and I live with the literally archivist for a old and stale soviet jokes.
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>>39448410

If you go with the 1950's, Suvorov wrote three other books that are good for gamers: Inside the Soviet Army, Inside Soviet Military Intelligence*, and SPETSNAZ: Inside the Soviet SAS. All are great as RPG supplements-- lots of facts and figures plus some good flavor and "plot hooks" aka historical anecdotes. Also, each is about 200 pages and written for non-academics.

* soviet military intelligence = GRU. Many of the biggest spy successes in soviet history were GRU operations, not KGB. Klaus Fuchs, the Rosenbergs, the penetration of the German General Staff in WW2, the Red Orchestra. Etc. The only thing suvorov doesn't give you are character templates.

Russia still has him under death sentence, and got revenge by posting the plaintext of his books on the web. So they're easily googleable.
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>>39448750

Crafting cynical jokes about their economic/political system was one area where the soviets were remarkably productive.
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>>39448807
Also procuring materials/goods which was "illegal" and scarce. Hell, first games and copies of Windows for russian PC was pirated and remained so until very recently.
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>>39449151

Which Windows was that? Windows 3.1 came out after the Soviet Union dissolved, and I can hardly imagine anyone bothering to pirate the early versions.
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>>39448788
>and got revenge by posting the plaintext of his books on the web
That's harsh, but also very funny

>>39448684
>>39448065
>>39447928
>>39447675
>>39446350
>>39447484
These are great
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>>39448065
Radio Yerevan was asked: "Is it true that half of the members of the Central Committee are idiots?"
Radio Yerevan answered: "Rubbish. Half of the central committee are not idiots."
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Allright i'm gonna dump what i know. sorry bout spelling but i am writing on my phone because my keyboard ia cyrillic only.

Gun laws: officially rural citizens could own rifles but not pistols. Police officers and postmen had revolvers. But due to partizans in ww2 there were illegal guns everywere.

In 1947 meat was still rationed but grain was not. Altought there were starvation in some areas. Soviet agriculture never really got effective. Many farmers bred rabbits and kept small gardena in secret.
there were purges but generally people in the lower class could just shut up. The large scale spying on citizens had not yet started. But intelligensia had to be careful who they talked to.
electricity and telephone was common in rural russia. Thanks to Lenin. But flowing water was not and roads were bad.
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>>39449428
>roads were bad
And so they remain to this day.
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>>39449428
Why did postmen carry guns?
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>>39449500
Yes Tell me abou it.
I could not visit grandparents in spring for roads turned to muck. and this was 1999 and they living 3hours from peter
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>>39449540
I'm assuming because they went to the most rural and isolated places carrying valuable stuff.
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>>39449540
Because of robbers And animals since postmen carried wages for A workers and packages they carried nagan to defend themself and post.
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>>39449428
>But intelligensia had to be careful who they talked to.
In what way?

Is Intelligensia the NKVD information-gathering branch?
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>>39449643
Intelligensia is anyone with post-secondary education.

Or in Mao's China, anyone wearing glasses.
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>>39449540
same reason all russian motorvehicles have dash cameras. Russia was, and still is largely a lawless shit hole.

>>39449643
intelligensia is an old word for the learned class, proffesional scholars. You know the old joke "a <insert nationality here> army needs 3 men to read and write letters, one man to read, one man to write, and one man to watch over people who participate in such subversive behaviour."

the NKVD persecuted thought crime tirelessly so if you wondered aloud about some obvious issues the country faced you could get informed on and gulag'd.
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>>39449624
>>39449601
That sounds pretty cool. OP should run a game with the party as mailmen.
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>>39449540

I'm going to guess because people sent valuable stuff by mail. During the war, Red Army soldiers sent home vast amounts of loot all through the mail system, so I'd imagine the temptation to knock the local postman off and grab all that stuff for yourself was high.
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>>39449684
you're thinking of Pol-Pot. Mao was more reasonable with his ideological purges.
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>>39449643
No intelligentsia was educated people and other high status peoples. researcher. Professor. Officers and great musicians and actors. They were often more vocal and moved around more then population so they were often more vocal about politics.
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>>39449500
>And so they remain to this day.
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>>39449643
Intelligentsia it's not branch of NKVD. It's more broad name for loose groups and loners of artists, writes, actors, professors and occasional engineers, I.e, "university educated" people.
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Man with a Movie Camera is on Netflix. It's a silent film and has some propaganda elements but it's worth watching if you're interested in Soviet Russia or film.
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>>39449643
facepalm.jpg
The Intelligentsia is the politico-intellectual population of the nation, the university professors, writers, poets, journalists, that kind of folk. As you can guess most of the Intelligentsia which wasn't at least pretending to be pro-stalin was shot and dead by 1947.
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>>39449722
What do you mean? Like 70% of that road is solid concrete!
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>>39449722
You know what they say:
In Russian there only three problems: fools, roads, and when those two meet each other
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>>39449711
Great Leap Forward, reasonable?
He might have been slightly less batshit insane than Pot, but still...
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>>39449428
OP here, thanks for the info!
In fact, thank you everyone in the thread for your help! You've certainly given me a lot to work with! If I get this game going (probably some time in September) I'll certainly let you guys know how it went!
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>>39449838
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>>39449859
The throne of skulls I get, but what's with the apples?
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>>39449859
slightly more reasonable.

not by much but still.
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>>39449838
I think some of this concrete maked from unicorn horns and pixie dust.
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>>39449823
For example my grand-dad who lived in Yugoslavia was a psychology professor/researcher and a poet. He spent many years in labour camps because of his comments, which were all noted down by his friend/colleague which was later revealed to be a party agent.
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>>39449905
Bullthis, it's a good road except for the holes.

>>39449887
Now this is a little worse, but just because of the water, gotta be decent road on a sunny day.
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>>39449929
actually I already wrote this once let me repost it.
1940's : horrible, anyone against the revolution killed. My grandfather got imprisoned for several years only for saying that the personality worship Tito was getting was undeserved. When people went to vote for the first and last time in Yugoslavia there were only 2 choices: Communist or "Other". If you voted "other" you were blacklisted. Still there was a village where "other" won. That village was razed to the ground
1949 : Tito-Stalin split. Tito refuses to be Stalin's bitch
1950's : Massive witch hunt against real or percieved stalinists. My grandfather was released because there was no more room in prisons. USA gives us weapons to get on their side. Thus commenced the great shilling game where west qnd east tried to get Yugoslavia on their side. These donations were one of the things that kept Yugoslavia afloat. Otherwise people still lived like in wartime, comfort wise. Coffe and meat were mythical artifacts only available to the inner circle of the party. Massive industrialization.
1960's : Yugoslavia swings back to favoring SU. During these times began the urbanization. Tito starts the Union of Unaligned Countries with Nasser and random african shitholes. Because of this coffe is reintroduced. Massive hysteria as the first shipments of bananas arrive. Butcheries appear, though the quality of the meat is extremly dubious. Yugo music scene slowly starting.
1970's : Yugoslavia swings back towards the west. Start of massive tourism improves the economy dramatically, though the regime is still harsh. Yugo music scene is now in full motion. Quality of life was good, though the meat was still uneatable. When someone will try to sell you Yugoslavia as an utopia, they will probably show you cherrypicked photos of 70's Yugoslavia.
1980: Tito dies.
1980's : the so called "lead years" as Yu leadership swings back towards the Soviets. As Tito and Nasser died the Unaligned Movement fell into irrelevance.
con
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>>39449994
1980's cont: this basically meant that Yugoslavia became a Soviet partner. While the hard line communists that were more or less irrelevant under Tito could finally start jerking off, the economy went down the gutter. Coffe became rare once again and the famous pair/unpair rule was established for vehicles. Basically if your car plate ended in an unpair number (2n+1) you could only drive on unpair days (the 1st, 3rd, 5th, 7th, etc...) and pair numbers plates had the same for pair days. During these times the communist kleptocracy that still rules alk ex-yu countries from light or shadow git its untouchable status. The Serbs were also able to institutionalize their dominance over other republics. Even if this was obvious since 1947.
1989-1990-1991
Democratic movements start gaining steam as the people are sick of 40 years of more or less overt Serb occupation. Even though some were imprisoned, we finally got our independence. Cue short war to throw out Serbs out of Slovenia. The kleptocrats morph into "Social Democrats" and in alliance with the yugo mafia/ ex-UDBA start funelling wealth into cypriot bank accounts.
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>>39449903
Reference to agriculture? I don't know.
>>
Thanks guys.
Being intelligentsia does not sound good for your health

I give in return a Russian joke
>Where were you born? St. Petersburg.
>Where did you go to school? Petrograd.
>Where do you live now? Leningrad.
>And where would you like to live? St. Petersburg.
>>
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>>39449984
>it's a good road except for the holes.
Hell is a good place except for the flames.
>>
>>39447177
>they'd come within a hare's breath
It's actually "a hair's breadth".
>>
>>39450024
Mostly because he killed "the city civilization" by urging cities and exiling people into forests. So I guess, it's about hunger or shit.
>>
Reminder before things gets too propaganda'y that Russia and Nazi-Germany had an agreement where they'd basically split Europe evenly between themselves in the coming war. Only reason Russia sided with the Allies in the end is because Germany got greedy and went back on the deal in '41 (I think it was)
>>
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>>39450056
Well, is it better now that it's Petersburg again?
>>
>>39450091

'Tis the Soviet Union, not Russia in particular. It is an important distinction. For example, the leader at the time was Georgian.
>>
>>39450102
Better than next year.
>>
All that Radio Yerevan jokes are glorious, but let's try some variety:

Rabinovich fills out a job application form. The official is skeptical:
"You stated that you don't have any relatives abroad, but you do have a brother in Israel."
"Yes, but he isn't abroad, I am abroad!"

Seeing a pompous and lavish burial of a member of the Politburo, Rabinovich sadly shakes his head:
"What a waste! What a waste! With this kind of money, I could have buried the entire Politburo!"

Rabinovich is walking through the forest with a sheep, when both of them stumble into a pit. A few minutes later, a wolf also falls into the pit. The sheep gets nervous and starts bleating.
"What's with all the baaahh, baaahh?" Rabinovich asks, "Comrade wolf knows whom to eat."
>>
>>39450056
>Being intelligentsia does not sound good for your health
It was not so bad if you keep bowing your head to The Party at all times.

>Comrade Stalin, we've heard you're collection jokes about your person and The Party, is that true?
>Yes, it is true, comrade journalist.
>And how many have you got so far?
>Oh plenty, three gulags worth.
>>
>>39448065
>>39448065
Radio Yerevan was asked: "What are communist jokes?"
Radio Yerevan answered: "Communist jokes are jokes that enemy spies invent, counter-revolutionaries spread and the Communist Party puts into practice"
>>
>>39450237
Ah! Classic Rabinovich and Odessa jokes.
>>
>>39450146
>Reformist history: Soviet Union did nothing wrong edition

It was only a matter of time before the nazis and the soviets would be at war. Both sides knew this and prepared for it.

The Soviets were restructuring the army after the officer purge and were only getting stronger. The Nazis simply struck while they had the upper hand.
>>
Jokes about policemen
"These often revolve around the supposition that the vast majority of Russian and Soviet militsioners accept bribes. Also, they are not considered to be very bright. At all."

Three prizes were awarded for the successes in Socialist competition of traffic inspection dept. #18.
The third prize is the Complete Works of Vladimir Lenin.
The second prize is 100 roubles and a ticket to Sochi...
The first prize is a portable stop sign.
{because such a portable stop sign allows the militsioner to put it in an unexpected or hard to see place on a road, fine everyone passing it and appropriate most of the fines for himself.}


A person on a bus tells a joke:
"Do you know why policemen always go in pairs?"
"No, why?"
"It's specialization: one knows how to read, the other — how to write."
A hand promptly grabs him by the shoulder — a policeman is standing right behind him! "Your papers!" he barks. The hapless person surrenders his papers. The policeman opens them, reads, and nods to his partner:
"Write him up a citation for slandering the Soviet Militsiya, Vasya."
>>
>>39449859
The Great Leap Forward was mostly incompetence.
>>
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>>39450497
>supposition
Fact.
>>
>>39450572
>mostly incompetence.
Except it was looked upon with dread even by other communist states.
Seriously, how can you brand "despite having problems with food, let's force the peasants to smelt iron during harvest season" as incompetence?
>>
>>39450760
how do you describe "Mao was stupid enough to believe that peasants can smelt iron with the same capacity as industrial machinery due to some creative hoaxing" as anything BUT incompetence?

yeah it resulted in a lot of deaths but Mao wasn't INTENTIONALLY killing off a portion of his populace.

Pol-Pot meanwhile was killing everyone with glasses because he wanted the teachers gone so he could rewrite history.
>>
A Chukcha sits on the shore of the Bering Strait. An American submarine surfaces. The American captain opens the hatch and asks: "Which way is Alaska?"

The Chukcha points his finger: "That way!"

"Thanks!" says the American, shouts "South-South-East, bearing 159.5 degrees!" down the hatch and the submarine submerges.

Ten minutes later a Soviet submarine emerges. The Russian captain opens the hatch and asks the Chukcha: "Where did the American submarine go?"

The Chukcha replies: "South-South-East bearing 159.5 degrees!"

"Don't be a smart-ass," says the captain, "just point your finger!"

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Somewhere in the Atlantic Ocean, two submarines, Soviet and American, come to the surface. The Soviet one is old and rusty; the American one is new and shiny.

On the Soviet one, the crew lounges about without any order, and a drunken captain yells at them: "Who threw a boot on the control board? I'm asking you, who threw a boot on the control board?!".

From the American submarine, a shaved, sober and well-dressed captain, notes sarcastically: "You know, folks, in America...".

The Russian captain dismissively brushes him off: "America??! Ain't no fucking America no more!" (Turns back to the crew) "Who threw a boot on the control board?!"
>>
>>39449994
As far as evil dictators were, Tito was on the milder side, though I wonder what would have happened if Hitler had been able to successfully off him during WWII.
>>
>>39450855
>"America??! Ain't no fucking America no more!" (Turns back to the crew) "Who threw a boot on the control board?!"
and just like the submarine's missiles, my sides are gone.
>>
>>39444234

don't believe the stormfags ITT, the USSR had

>fair, free and open legal system
>full LGBTQPQUALMNOP rights
>full civil rights
>supported civil rights struggles all over the world (including the US)
>free education
>best educational facilities at the time
>cheap, plentiful food
>free entertainment for the working class
>free holidays for the working class
>free world class healthcare for the working class
>>
Jokes on University Students

"State universities (the only type of universities in existence in Soviet times) are notable for carelessness about the students' comfort and the quality of food. Most jokes make fun of these "interesting" conditions, inventive evasion by students of their academic duties or lecture attendance, constant shortage of money and sometimes about alcoholic tendencies of engineering students."

A memo in a student dining hall: "Students, do not drop your food on the floor, two cats have already been poisoned!".


A student in the canteen:
"Can I have 2 wieners... <whispers around: "Look at the rich guy!">.... and 17 forks, please?"


A very rumpled student peeks into an exam room and slurs at the examiner: "Pp-proffessosssor, wou'd you al-low a drunk student tt-o tt-ake the exam?"
The professor sighs and says, "Sure, why not."
The rumpled student turns around and slurs into the hallway: "G-guys, c-carry 'im in."
>>
>>39448235
It almost happened in Western Europe, too. The Freikorpsen may have gone on to form the backbone of the SA, but they probably saved Europe, too.
>>
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>>39450989
Oh, goodie, a false flag shitposter.
>inb4 no i am most definately real
No-one uses acronyms that long unless they're making fun of a group.
>>
>>39451030
So I presume you're with the guys who betrayed France then?
>>
>>39449624
Jesus christ, that's the coolest hook for a Hunter game I've ever heard.
>>
>>39451029
>evasion by students of their academic duties or lecture attendance, constant shortage of money and sometimes about alcoholic tendencies
So universities are universal, huh?
>>
>>39451053
aww look, a jealous stormfag
>>>/pol/
>>
A lecturer visits the mental hospital and gives a lecture about how great communism is. Everybody claps loudly except for one person who keeps quiet.
The lecturer asks: "Why aren't you clapping?"
And the person replies: "I'm not a psycho, I just work here."


-----------------------------------

"There is a large number of jokes about distrofiks, people with acute dystrophy. The main topics are extreme weakness, slowness, leanness, and weightlessness of a dystrophic patient."

Muscular dystrophy patients are playing hide and seek in the hospital.
"Vovka, where are you?"
"I'm here, behind this broomstick!"
"Hey, didn't we have an arrangement not to hide behind thick objects?"

A jolly doctor comes into a dystrophy ward:
"Greetings, eagles!"
"We're not eagles," replied one of the patients. "We're only flying because the nurse turned the fan on!"

A muscular dystrophy patient is lying in bed and shouting:
"Nurse! Nurse!"
"What is it now?"
"Kill the fly! It's trampling my chest."
>>
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>>39451126
No, I'm saying you're a stormfag trying to make real left wingers look like idiots who think the soviet union wasn't a shithole.
On a side note, the soviet union most definately did criminalize homosexuality, claiming that being gay was almost as bad as being capitalist.
>>
>>39450824
>yeah it resulted in a lot of deaths but Mao wasn't INTENTIONALLY killing off a portion of his populace.
Except he did in some regions.
>>
>>39451073
>betrayed France
but, Anon, France was the one doing the betraying for the most part
>>
>>39450824
I would use 'lunacy' instead of 'incompetence'.
>>
>>39451161
>Stormfag false flagging this hard
haha pls
>>>/pol/
>>
>>39451073
Fuck France, either way. If I need to give up France to keep Europe commie-free, I'd slam the button immediately.
>>
>>39444234
>>Evil Yankees offering bountiful bribe of eggs to russians
>>Container only has one egg
Goddamned Russians are poor if they can only imagine eggs being sold by individual units. This is just like the Commies deciding to not screen grapes of wrath, since poor Americans with cars seemed freakishly wealthy by commie standards.
>>
Soviet major sleeps on the night-shift by the pulpit in the Strategic Missiles HQ, but he can't find a comfortable position.
Next day he reports to his superior "everything is on its place, comrade-general"
"On its place? On its PLACE?! Where the hell is Belgium?!"
>>
>>39451030
That's like comparing one malign tumor with another. Nazi ideology might have surfaced as reaction to communist one but that doesn't justify or absolve it in any capacity, just like soviet liberation of eastern europe from nazis doesn't absolve the union from its subsequent dominion over them.
What's more worrisome is the overarching tendency of some people to be willing to use similar practices to enforce their ideology, and it doesn't really matter what specific ideology is in question.
>>
>>39451087
Have the players be conscripted as postmen, traveling from town to town, fighting monsters and dodging the MGB, Nagant in hand?
...Now that does sound good!
>>
>>39451149
reminds me of old anecdote

as new patient is brought to mental ward he walks thru yard and sees patients jumping of tree. he asks
what are you playing
- apple tree.
-how is played?
- apple apple who is red jump down the tree. everybody jumps down. next round new guy joins.
- apple apple who is red jump down the tree
-i am still green
-green ones we knock down whit rocks
>>
>>39451029
>The stomach of a crocodile can digest concrete, a student can digest that crocodile.
>>
>>39450868
He was a good statesman, if you take into account he had the education of a locksmith.
>>
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this might be interesting read for those who wonder why rooster is an insult
>>
>>39451312
I think that's egg powder actually.
>>
The time for Poruchik Rzhevsky jokes is here! Уpa! Уpa! Уpa!


Poruchik Rzhevsky is putting his riding boots on and is about to take leave of a charming demoiselle he had met the previous evening.
"Mon cher Poruchik," intones the siren, "aren't you forgetting about the money?"
Rzhevsky turns to her and says proudly: "Hussars never take money!"
Poruchik Rzhevsky is walking with Kniaz Andrei Bolkonski.
"Tell me, Poruchik, how did you come to be so good with the ladies? What is your secret?"
"It's quite simplement, mon Prince, quite simplement. I just come over and say: 'Madame, would you like to fuck?'"
"But Poruchik, you'll get slapped in the face for that!"
"Oui, some of them slap, but some of them fuck."
Natasha Rostova has her first ball and dances with Pierre Bezukhov:
"Pierre, isn't that grease on your collar?"
"Oh my, how could I miss such a terrible flaw in my costume, I'm totally destroyed" (walks away).
Then she dances with Kniaz Bolkonsky:
"Andrew, isn't there a dip of sauce on your tunic?"
Bolkonsky faints.
Finally she's dancing with Rzhevsky:
"Poruchik, your boots are all covered in mud!"
"It's not mud, it's shit. Don't worry, mademoiselle, it'll fall off once it dries up."
Poruchik Rzhevsky and Natasha Rostova are riding horses together on the countryside.
"Poruchik, what a beautiful meadow! Guess what I see there?"
"Ass, mademoiselle?"
"Ouch, Poruchik! I see chamomiles!"
"How romantic, mademoiselle! An ass amid chamomiles!"
Poruchik Rzhevsky narrates his latest adventure to his Hussar comrades.
"...So I am riding through this dark wood and suddenly see a wide, white..."
Hussars, all together: "...arse!"
"Of course not! A glade full of chamomiles! And right in the middle there is a beautiful white..."
Hussars encore: "...arse!"
"How vulgar of you! A mansion! So I open the door and guess what I see?"
Hussars, in toto: "An arse!"
Poruchik, genuinely surprised: "How did you guess? Did I tell this story before?"
>>
>>39451192
yeah and stalin did the same thing in some regions too. Most of the communist regimes engaged in genocide with the intent of making their populace easier to control.

Pol-Pot is a special kind of crazy because his targets were first "everyone who lives in a city and who won't move" followed by "anyone with a mildly complex education and or glasses"
>>
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pz7jOry30f4
>>
>>>/co/71409203

oi, cyrrillic fags.

what the fuck does this say?
>>
>>39451594
This mr Rzhevsky seems a pretty cool guy.
>>
>>39451645
Hitler went through hitler and saw hitler hitler hitler...
>>
Did Soviet postmen use trucks? Horses? Or were they told "Get walking Comrade"?
>>
>>39451705
or more precisely
Hitler went through hitler
hitler sees
hitler hitler
hitler pushed hitler in hitler
hitler hitler hitler hitler

I think
>>
>>39450989
>cheap
This implies a monetary system, you filthy counter-revolutionary capitalist pig.
>>
>>39449290
It was XP.
>>
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>>39451717
Well, as a matter of fact....

"Designed by the Soviet GAZ car factory in 1959, based on the Pobeda car (GAZ-M20). An AI-14 aircraft engine. Cruising speed 30-35 km/h. Initially developed to deliver mail and transport equipment; also picked up by the military; could be modified to run on wheels when the snow wasn’t so severe."
>>
>>39451717
Bicycles.
When you can't guess what mode of transportation was used for a task in the soviet bloc, always assume bicycles.
>>
>>39451348
The SA are more like the guys Nazi ideology used, and then discarded. They were said to be beefsteak; brown on the outside, red on the inside. or maybe pink, given that their leader was openly gay.

Kind of shitty how people conflate them with the Nazi regime when they were murdered by said regime.
>>
>>39451594
I think you should add that the 'Poruchik' is the equivalent of the 'lieutenant'.
>>
>>39451822
...So I should have the PCs ride as a group on a bunch of bicycles?

>>39451813
Holy fuck, that is cool. But I'd feel it'd detract from the more serious tone.
>>
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>>39451813
>>
>>39451931
>having bicycle for each person
>not riding in pairs
>>
>>39452053
>They begin to form factions
>"I'm not letting Anon on my bicycle! He's not trustworthy!"
>>
>>39451931
>Holy fuck, that is cool. But I'd feel it'd detract from the more serious tone.

How about a SUV, then?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=he8Y1HEh89I
>>
>>39452120
Much better! Plus I can make it a beat up piece of shit that breaks down randomly Or whenever I need to drop a plot-hook
>>
>>39451931
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Russian_Post#Soviet_Union
>>
>>39452085
Alright guys, there's five of us, and after the last fight we only got two bikes. And you know this ramshackles won't take more than two people each. So who's the best runner?
>>
>>39444234
>What was life as a civilian like?
Hard: plants and farms still worked in wartime mode to restore devastated country as quick as possible, so 12-16 hours shifts were still common. Many men died on battlefields, so there was much more women in all kinds of jobs. There were villages where only one man lived. There is no statistics about PTSD, but I suppose it was really widespread, since homicide rates skyrocketed after the war - many men considered killing opponent as an option to finish argument. Thiefs and robbers appeared again after relatively quite 30s; there is quite authentic film about post-war Moscow criminal police "The meeting place cannot be changed" there are english subs for it. Most people lived in communal appartments: several 20-40 sq meters rooms one for each family and common kitchen and bathroom, so full appartments that were given to qualified and experienced doctors, engineers, high rank party members etc. were real privilege. Private transport was very rare since plants just didn't built enough, so in countryside without public transport people often walked 10+ miles/day. All in all the country was too poor and devastated to give private goods and services to significant part of population, so public schools, medicine, transport (trams mostly), catering, and communal appartments were not low class options, so they were more widespread, and organised and examined better than today.
>What did people eat?
Groats, pasta, bread, vegetables, canned food and field rations. Meat was expensive. Plus there was the last true famine in Soviet history in 1946.
>Did they still have rationing?
It was canceled in December of 1947.
>>
>>39452565
>How did law enforcement operate?
Pretty close to wartime mode. Again - see "The meeting place cannot be changed". Mostly people seem road guards, foot patrols (with long arms in the night) and their local uchastcovy - police officer whose primal duty was to investigate not serious crimes and help detectives with information if something serious would happen in his district. In remote communities uchastkovy often was main LEO, about as sheriff.
>What sort of gun laws did they have?
On the one hand, it was illegal for common citizen to own anything more serious then hunting rifle. On the other, not only LEO were armed, but many government employees that worked with something valuable like postmen, since they were carring salaries, bridge caretakers or dosaaf instructors etc. (Nagant revolvers and TT'e mostly). (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/DOSAAF). People could also shoot and train in Dosaaf as soon as they turned 14. Many veterans had premium pistols they got with medals.Plus tons of unlicensed weapons from pistols to MGs and mortars that let after the war.
>>
>>39452565
>>39452599
Thanks! This is good information!
>>
>>39448788


New to the thread and I don't know if you're still around, but I read Icebreaker, and that was one of the most ridiculous piles of manure I've ever seen in my life; is his other stuff really better?
>>
>>39452565
>There is no statistics about PTSD, but I suppose it was really widespread, since homicide rates skyrocketed after the war - many men considered killing opponent as an option to finish argument.
It wasn't much different in pre-war Union. Tough life, tougher people.
>>
On guns, including at least one of these should be customary
>>
>>39452851
>>
>>39452756
You have to take it with grain of salt.
"Suicide", for example.
Suvorow thrashes between condemning both Soviet and Nazi leadership, to almost ejaculating how great soviet equipment was(Agrimotors, anon! The BEST IN THE WORLD! Those canons? BEST IN THE WORLD! Tanks? BEST IN THE WORLD!).
>>
>>39452866

>"For faith, tsar, and [unreadable]"
>Six notches
>>
>>39452907
Yee-Haw!!
>>
>>39452907
Unreadable part says "oтeчecтвo" aka “motherland", though more direct translation is "fatherland"
>>
>>39452971
How to correctly use a obrez.
Also, it will not fire if you don't shout "URAAAAAAAAAAA!" before pulling the trigger.
>>
>>39452907
It says "for faith(God), tsar and my country"
>>
>>39453022
Russians confirmed for literally being orks.
Doubles so for their "Lenin mushroom" meme-thing.
>>
>>39453098
More like orks confirmed for being russian.
>>
>>39452994
Whoops, nevermind the name, i'm not a virtualoptim.
>>
>>39453197
The autistic menace is still at large I gather?
>>
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>I'm setting a campaign in soviet russia
>>
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>>39452851
>>39452866
>>39452907
>>39452971
>>39453022
I'll be sure to have some back-woods cult sporting these bad-boys.
>>
>>39453098
I think the Americans conform a lot more, though. Ork stuff basically looks American, and Americans personified the concept of "more dakka" during WWII. The troops themselves were also more gung-ho.

I'd say the Soviets are Zerg.
>>
>no guns
>no food
>secret police kidnapped / robbed anyone wealthy and not connected to power
>lots of horny widows
>everyone smokes and drinks vodka
>>
>>39453621
>orks
>americans
I think you kinda fucked up there. Aren't they based on english hooligans?
>>
>>39453699
This is a 1927 period. 1947 adds a Nazis in the pot
>>
>>39453699
>horny women and booze

sometimes russia sounds like a cool place to visit
>>
>>39453621
Why zergs tho?
>>
>>39453749
>russia
>cool
I see what you did there, comrade.
>>
>>39453755
because they're an unnatural monstrous force that destroys and corrupts everything it touches
>>
>>39453733
ummm
>>
>>39453780
So... chaos?
>>
>>39453780
Whoa there buddy, are you from 50s ? Does the time machine works perfectly?
>>
>>39453621
>I'd say the Soviets are Zerg.
you're forgeting Brasil
>>
>>39453733
>1947
Ah,The Great Return of Nazi Ghosts. My favorite part of alternative history.
>>
>>39453727
From everyone else's point of view, americans and brits are all pretty much the same. Americans have a bit less class and tea, and better weather, but that's it.
>>
>>39453841
>class and tea
>that's it
B-but that's the main difference!
>>
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>Decide the PCs should be delivering in a GAZ-61
>Because no off road capablity
>Probably donated by some officer getting a upgrade
>Look up it's statistics
>Max speed 66mph
>0-60 in 35 seconds
Goddamn this piece of shit is perfect
>>
>>39453880
English hooligans don't have any class, so they're just tea-drinking americans. Since orkz don't drink tea, this makes orkz and americans the same.
>>
>>39453727
>>39453829
I'm mostly thinking of WWII.

>>39453841
The Brits are the Eldar. Nazi's the Imperium the SS being Space Marines
>>
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>>39444234
OP, have you ever heard the word "stilyagi"?
No?

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Stilyagi

https://www.google.es/search?q=%D1%81%D1%82%D0%B8%D0%BB%D1%8F%D0%B3%D0%B8&num=20&source=lnms&tbm=isch&sa=X&ei=YUo0VYSHGMzeaojLgPgE&ved=0CAcQ_AUoAQ&biw=1252&bih=638
>>
>>39453944
>tea-drinking americans
More like americans are non-tea-drinking englishmen.
>>
>>39454032
But while you had a few elite units, the SS usually did worse than the regular Heer, despite fancier bling
>>
>>39454033
>"music on the bones"
>cue music-based necromancers
>>
>>39454058
The result is the same. Orkz are american.
>>
>>39454032
The eldar look more like frenchmen to me. I mean, look at those prepotent faggots with ballerina poses. I dare you: pick any eldar picture, put a bubble with "honhonhon, je suis tres jollie!" on the eldars mouth and then tell me it doesn't fit.
>>
>>39454032
Eldar are French
>>
>>39454230
Except the French are much more capable in real life. That silly reputation of theirs? All the Brits' doing, even as they left them to be killed by the Nazi's. The Brits are terrible allies, really. Just like the Eldar.
>>
>>39454352
French detected.
>>
>>39454623
Nope. Just someone who doesn't drink the Brit koolaid.

You faggots really were terrible allies, and enormous blowhards at that. Again, Just like the Eldar.
>>
>>39454660
Terrible allies to who?
>>
>>39454660
>you

I'm just a spaniard, we were not even on that war. And I know the frenchmen actually have been historically and are pretty capable at warfare . But eldars fit the french stereotype.

The brits can be deldars since they're filthy pirates with no honor.
>>
>>39454684
Everyone.
>>
>>39451813
These mail guys just keep getting cooler and cooler.
>>
>>39454684
One doesn't get the appelative "perfidious" for nothing.
>>
>>39454717
The Japs are already Dark Eldar, because they flew around in rice paper aircraft, were insanely harsh on each other, and gleefully tortured anyone they damn wel pleased.

And they fuck squid, that too.
>>
>>39454765
Japs are tau like all people that are more eastern than India because arr rook the same.
>>
>>39454804
Tau are what Western people think Japs are like. Real life WWII Japs are straight up Dark Eldar, or at least Chaos. Modern Japs are like some shitty hive city.
>>
>>39454352
True, France has historically been up there with the best of them in warfare, and is pretty competent today.

But they're still the country second most to blame for WW2 (not the things in it mind, just starting the damn thing)
>>
>>39454884
The countries to blame are all but France, since they didn't destroyed Germany when France wanted to do so.

Look now, Germany fucking Europe again and bullying the weak (this time greece).
>>
>>39454884
Oh I don't know, not forming the Dyle line over the winter of 39 probably lost them the easy war they and the Brits expected.
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>>39454932
France still signed, didn't they?
Versailles was always going to fuck up, but Wilson's the real offender there.

1936 though, that's all on France.
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>>39454932
>Look now, Germany fucking Europe again and bullying the weak (this time greece).

>what the fuck am I reading.jpg
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>>39455348
Making someone pay denbts is pure evil, you know.
>>
>>39455119
>>39454932
>Versailles will never have been either exactly what France wanted or exactly what Wilson wanted
>instead we got a half-assed mess that crippled Germany, but only enough to make them angry
>>
>>39454932
With the difference that those tax eveders fully deserve the bullying. Whenever someone identifies themselves as greek, I ask them if they shouldn't be at work right now, to pay off their debts.
>>
>>39455711
Or maybe they should be lynching their government for fucking up their country, instead of electing populist idiots who claim to be able to conjure money out of nothing.
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>>39454932
The only thing Germany is doing NOW is demanding greece pay its fucking debts.

god forbid a country be fiscally responsible.
>>
>>39455747
Big revolts happened in Greece when all this shit started though.
>>
>>39455747
That goes for couple other countries, Greece is just most obvious example.
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>>39455767
No, the same popular movements that exist in any Western country threw a few rocks, a few people stepped down, and they all flocked to the ballot box voting for the same old, and then partied as if they actually achieved something.

It was like a fucking African election, I'm not even kidding.
>>
>>39455747
Or maybe they shouldn't have decided to make tax evasion and cheating money from the gov't a national hobby. But true, the gov is to blame too, for letting that happen. Now they're getting that karma back.
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>>39454684
Name someone you haven't betrayed, cheated, or stolen from.
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>>39456902
...

Peru?
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>>39456927
...someone who matters!
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>>39452756

Haven't read that one, but know the gist. Yeah mostly speculation, it actually exonerates Stalin a bit (unintentionally) because the whole evil alliance becomes a pretext to buy time to eliminate the Nazis. But there's no good evidence and it was before his time.

The three books I listed were from his direct personal experience. Some details were disputed at publication by reviewers, but after the fall of the ussr suvorov was totally vindicated. Don't judge him by Icebreaker.
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>>39457010
Peru is people too!
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>>39457280
No, Anon, Peru is a piece of land.
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>>39457609
I can't tell the difference, I'm British I grind both under the empire's heels.
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>>39458117

You apparently also can't tell the difference between Peru and Argentina.
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>>39458521
If he's a proper Englishman he doesn't need to make the difference! But see this map here for the answer to the original question.
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>>39458521
Argentina is the one with the negroids correct?
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>>39451030

In terms of living standards, Stalin did increase them. The problem is that there isn't any drive to really qualify exactly what about the Soviet Union was specifically bad for Russians. Its always represented as a total loss that would have been a whole lot better if only the Czar stayed in power; but really this is a case of whitewashing Russia's history pre and post USSR.

For one, Russia has never and will never be a place that values its citizenry. Imperial Russians participated in some of the earliest examples of 'modern genocide' against people like the Circassians and other people who weren't Russian enough. Not to mention where all of that Siberia actually came from, spoiler alert it sure wasn't peaceful.

Secondly:
>>39448573
Fuck this guy and everyone who thinks like him. The deterministic perspective that the Soviet Union, or communism as a whole, was bound to lead to our contemporary outcome is like saying South Vietnam would still exist without a North Vietnam. Even if it was, the idea that it would have better to have a greater Nazi Germany than a communist Europe is literally what got Nazis in fucking charge.

I'm not going to say all Soviet problem came from the west, but the culture of paranoia and the overall overly defensive nature of the Soviet Union comes from very real events. The brutal response to the Paris Commune is in truth the heart of it, but there's also the allied intervention in the Russian Civil war and actual attempts to arm the conservatives and clergy of Russia by the west in order to reset the government back to an Imperial system.

Soviet Union wasn't good, and it would have been better as a social-democracy like Germany is today. But if you're claiming that it was better under an absolutely incompetent, brutal, and corrupt Monarchy, or when it was literally owned by the Russian mafia in the 90s, then it really just says you don't know shit about the Soviet Union.
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>>39450855
I'm not sure I get the joke.
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>>39459427
Russia would of been better off as a whole if Alexander II wasn't assassinated. One of the few Tsars who wanted to increase the representation of the people and modernise Russia. Though he was going about committing genocide in the Caucasus.
>>
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>>39458617
>TFW Swedish
Yes
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>>39459554
>Though he was going about committing genocide in the Caucasus.

All the more reason to not assassinate him tbh
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>>39454932
>Germany
>fucking Europe
>bullying (Greece)
Fuck you. Germany created an economic entity that united Europe and allowed their great economy to bolster a new currency that could have seen to a new era of more responsible capitalism.

But guess what it went to instead? Free cheap loans to Greece so it could let its populace dodge taxes and never invest in infrastructure or decent bonds.

Greece singlehandedly ruined Europe by being the pile of shit it has always been since it stopped being part of Rome. They literally didn't come up with rules for loans because they assumed no one would be so incompetent to borrow without having a plan or the means to pay it back. Now Greece is getting the same bail out plan THAT FUCKING AFRICAN NATIONS GET.

Fuck you Greece,you're now less European than Turks and I long for the days when those two countries had Ottoman rulers.
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>>39447656

Massive WWII losses did affect Soviet society. There were noticeably more women than men and there were a lot of women in academia, science, and minor political positions than you'd expect.
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>>39459554
Maybe, but generally monarch's interest in bolstering the rights of their people, and modernization, stop as soon as it gets close to disrupting their power.

But yeah, definitely a case where the less shitty leader got shot for the worse.
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>>39450855
It took me a minute. A minute. Then I laughed like a hyena.
>>
One day, Ivan left work at the factory, and on the way home saw an object in the snow. It was a Monkey’s Paw, and such a thing could grant him all his wishes – at a price. But there was nothing he wanted, for he was happy with his work, and the state gave him everything he needed in life. His wife, Vanya, was a greedy and selfish woman, and took the paw for herself. That night she wanted more than her due share for dinner, so she wished for more food. Men from the Agency came and took Ivan away, and she ate his meal. Later that night, she became lonely, and wished for her husband to return. He did, with the men from the Agency, as he had done his duty and reported Vanya and the Monkey Paw. As the Agency men kicked down her door, she wished that they would leave. And so they burst into her room, dragged her from the house, and left.
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>>39460234
Whatatwist
>>
I'm a first generation Russian immigrant. Up until now my entire family lived in Russia.

I don't know everything but I've heard some tales from my grandmother, who was the headswoman of her village. Farmers were expected to give a certain amount of produce based on the amount of assets they had. If you had so and so cows you were expected to give so and so milk to the government on a daily basis. If you did not give the required amount of milk you were fined because it was assumed you were willfully keeping it for yourself. Many people did but sometimes the cows simply did not produce enough milk. As a result many of the poorer people who had less assets and so had a more variable output decided to destroy their assets in order to not get into trouble with the government. Cows were slaughtered, decades old fruit trees were cut down, and so on.

Quite often the government demanded more than the required amount. Modernizing the largest country on earth takes a lot of resources. In return it gave the citizens what amounted to IOU bills. After a few decades of the government declaring it is not quite ready to begin honoring them yet most people have given up on them ever being worth anything. Many farmers used them as fuel for their hearths. Some 40 years later, when the government started paying back, very few bills remained.

There were good sides too. My mother, a girl from a tiny village, was given the chance to study medicine in a big city. Free education was brought to the darkest corners of the country. It was a true meritocracy, or as much as any human system can be a meritocracy given our tendency toward corruption. Women were allowed to study and work at professions which the West effectively barred them from participating in until the 80s. Everyone remember the lean times and the food stamps but few seem to recall that homelessness was all but eliminated. The government provided an apartment to every citizen, free of charge.
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>>39460925
From what I know there was always a lot to contend with. In terms of corruption, well, the incredibly vast criminal networks in Russia predate the communists. With Stalin at the top it is sometimes surprising how much they managed. I hear a lot of people still wish the communists were around because it was safer then at least.

Russia fascinates a lot of people not in Russia. I think it's because it has, and still has, the potential to be one of the greatest countries in the world, but it also has the longest road ahead of it. A lot of dumb and miserable people making life worse for others around them.
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>>39461020
I've always thought that it's not RUSSIA that has the problem, but RUSSIANS; there's something about that godforsaken place that breeds sociopaths far, far more than any other place. you know, my grandparents used to say that cain wandered the earth until he came upon russia and saw that it was the land for his people, and sometimes I wonder if they're right. but then again, my family is ukrainian and polish, so what do I know
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>>39461020
I will put my feelings about Russia plainly: It is as doomed as it has always been. From inception it knew only blood and strife. Disparate tribes murder-raped by the Varangian into a whole, who were then murder-raped by the mongols into a new whole. Russia is the graveyard of bloodthirsty walords. It took back its independence from the golden horde. It alone crushed Napoleon when a grand coalition of the world's powers failed to do so. It strangled Hitler slowly, softly, with a tide of bodies, until he couldn't move under their weight. Yet it is Russia's rulers who have killed the most Russians. It is Russia's rulers that Russians fear. It is Russia's rulers who prevent Russia from ever living up to its potential.

Putin is but another prince. Nothing has changed and there is little reason to believe anything will.
>>
There is talk about a guy who does not like communism all that much in the borscht factory. By men in coats he was taken. Then talk about the possibility he told people he does not like communism at work. So borscht plant closed, and everyone who works there was taken away by men in coat. Then people said that the borscht factory workers had families within the village of cмeгмaгpaд that they may have talked to. Thus, men in coats saw they was taken away. Then they say that the families of these workers had friends in the village they could talk with. So the whole city was taken by men in coats. All moved out of the village in a mass grave in the middle of nowhere.
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>>39444234

It was full of Russians, so by default everything was shit.
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>>39460925
>It was a true meritocracy, or as much as any human system can be a meritocracy given our tendency toward corruption
A capitalism with socialised education is better in that respect. It doesn't need to be so anal about ideological purity, meaning that you don't have to subscribe to state ideology and (pretend to) be loyal to the state to get education, and some degree of competition in the economy helps limit nepotism which is much bigger problem in a system with single authority.
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>>39448235
People who want the USSR back tend to mean the late 50s and onward USSR, which was (at least seemingly) more stable and didn't enact random purges on its citizens (they only sent you to the gulag if you didn't keep your head down and contradicted the party line).
Still can't see why anybody would want it back, considering that even at the best of times, USSR was a corrupt, horribly run, barely functioning despotic goverment.

Actually, now that I think of it, that's pretty much what Russia is, was and always has been. So I quess the argument boils down to "things were the same as now, except we controlled half of Europe, were feared by the Americans and had a cool flag".
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>>39454932
Every day I'm reading something new about Greece being fucking retards about their economy spiralling ever downwards and every day I slap my face and go "why? How can an entire nation be this stupid?!"

And then I read your post. Is this what the Greek actually believe?

I saw this shit coming years ago. Greece as a whole were so economically inept that even my 16 year old self could see it plain as day. I remember asking my Sociological studies teacher something along the lines of "But isn't what they're doing bad? It seems like an untenable situation that just keeps getting worse"

And now they're pointing their mentally unstable debt-evading fingers at everything and everyone, trying desperately to avoid responsibility for pretty much single-handedly wrecking their own country. The rest of Europe has tried to bail them out again and again, and they keep fucking it up.

I say screw it. Screw them. They've used up their chances. Let them reap what they've sown. I honestly don't care what happens at this point. It's a shame that they're going to drag everyone else down with them.
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>>39446842
Also, no Santa Claus (though people did manage to get under the radar with 'Winter Daddy' as they called him then) and no writing with your left hand.

Source: I know two people who grew up in the USSR.
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>>39444234
>What was life as a civilian like? What did people eat?
My grandpa was like 10 years old when war was over i can tell some stories if you wish OP.
First of you during war there where no food whatsoever because if you was farmer (crestyanin to be precise but i don't know proper english word for that) even if you grow shit loads of crops you don't get jack because of soviet laws. Even if you steal two grains or more you could go to jail or worse. So common folk mostly eat weird stuff like roots of reed. Because of insane loses in front lines and people getting drafted all over the place each message from front lines almost always was about someones death, so imagine the picture. That was during the war tho.
After war there was fuckhuge rise of patriotic mood and slow as fuck rebuilding of country.
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>>39455747
They didn't conjure up the money from nothing. They got it from the Russians. Which is kind of nice, because that way the Russians will have to foot the bill once Greece finally flips from obviously insolvent to officially insolvent.
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>>39456577
>Or maybe they shouldn't have decided to make tax evasion and cheating money from the gov't a national hobby

True you must be this (X) rich to avoid tax
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>>39459572
>soon.jpg
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>>39461829
I am not talking about hypotheticals here, but about systems which actually existed. Communism has failed but to this day the lower classes of the West have it worse when it comes to social mobility.
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>>39444234
>What sort of gun laws did they have?
In the cities you pretty much couldn't own guns, in the countryside the laws were more lax.
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>>39463023
Yeah, as long as you don't mind "social mobility" that ends where middle class begins because that would mean having bourgeoisie and we can't have that, can we.
For people happy enough with life in a cage that's not even gilded but only slightly bigger a totalitarian system like that is good enough I guess.
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>>39463023
In the 60s and 70s mobility was pretty damn good, since then it's declined as the richest in society have fenced themselves off more and cut away the rungs they.themselves used to climb up
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>>39463310
At least you didn't need permit to move to a different town and don't get shot if you try to leave your country, even for a brotherly socialist nation, nevermind the degenerate west.
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>>39463363
>petyr left the country
>better shoot his wife and kids, that'll teach him!
>>
Alright, I think I'm catching on to the premise of the Russian jokes, especially the long-form ones. Here's an attempt.

--------

Deep in Stalingrad, three soldiers lie exhausted in the snow after three days of combat, too tired to keep on fighting the Nazi.

The first, Ivan, says to his comrade “I can go on no longer, Sergei. This fight has taken everything from me. I can’t bear to sleep another night, knowing I will wake the next morning. I will take my life.”

The second, Sergei, replies “But Ivan, suicide is a great crime. If you live, even when the war is over your punishment will continue.

But Ivan said “I do not care, for if I succeed I will forever escape all the punishment the State can dream up.”

But Sergei pressed on. “Ivan, I know you are a Christian for I have seen your hidden cross. Don’t you know suicide is a sin, the worst of all?”

But Ivan said “I do not care what happens when I am dead, for I do not care for the heaven of a God who can let men live in such a world as this. No,” he concluded, “I will commit suicide tonight and be in Hell by the morning, for after everything I have seen I know that hell could never be worse than this war.”

At this the third man, a Sergeant, snorted in derision.

“What is it, Sergeant?” they asked.

He turned to them, and spat.

”Suicide,” he grunted, “How do you think you got here?”

-----

Close? Off-mark?
>>
Eh. The structure is there but you're missing something. I can't put my finger on what.
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>>39462373
You know, this probably wouldn't work at all but I maintain the way to solve this once and for all was to give greece the harshest of ultimatums.

They get the bailout they need, but they have to put their nation up as collateral. Five, ten, whatever's reasonable years to get their shit in order and if they fail, they lose the country.

I'm not talking about IMF styled restructuring either, I mean signing a contract where if they fail to meet the terms Greece ceased to exist as a sovereign nation, becoming a territory of whomever gives them the loan, be it Germany, France, or the EU as a whole. They either get their shit in order themselves, or lose control of the country in favor of people who will force them to do it.
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>>39450989
That sounds like something a communist would say. Nice try, comrade!
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>>39459427
>In terms of living standards, Stalin did increase them.

An old woman asks her granddaughter: "Granddaughter, please explain Communism to me. How will people live under it? They probably teach you all about it in school." "Of course they do, Granny. When we reach Communism, the shops will be full – there'll be butter, and meat, and sausage … you'll be able to go and buy anything you want..." "Ah!" exclaimed the old woman joyfully. "Just like under the Tsar!"
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>>39463023
>Communism has failed but to this day the lower classes of the West have it worse when it comes to social mobility.
Except the "West" is not limited to US and UK.
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>>39464620
That's a horrible idea that would not want at all. Nation is not a corporation you could just take over with a court order.
It would be a violation of sovereignty and international law that would set a horrifying precedent for the future as it would imply that all that it takes to appropriate an enture country is to corrupt its government officials. It would be an atrocity.
What's more it would not fix the underlying problems because the new government would have even less power, authority and legitimity to carry out their remedial measures, well intentioned or not.
It would be better to everyone to just let them default and bail the creditors instead.
>>
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>>39465220
>bail the creditors
How? The creditors are the ones doing the bailing in the first place!
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>>39465247
Well at this point they are I suppose.

What was the fate of that debt haircut Greece supposedly already received? Is it a done deal or did they double back on it?
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>>39462373
Eh, don't worry too much.

The Greek government will fall sooner than the Greek economy.

Which means that in a few months, there will be a new government bravely patching up the holes left behind by the current nutcases.

I feel bad for the Greek minister of Economy though. He had a perfect deal set up with Europe, he calls it in with the rest of the government in Greece, and they just say "NO!".
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>>39458617
Australia has only been invaded if you count either the colonization or a single Japanese plane bombing Darwin that one time in WW2.
>>
>>39446941
Exactly. A politburo big wig might have the same salary as a factory foreman, but when you can divert party resources to supply you with limousines, fancy meals, women, and a fancy house...
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>>39464620
But then they'd have to be in charge of Greece, and who wants that?
>>
One thing I've always wondered is where the usage of "comrade" came from. It's not a Russian word, their equivalent sounds nothing like the word "comrade" phonetically.

How did this come into such heavy use in the popular perception of Soviet life?
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>>39465899
Do you mean english term or the locale specific equivalent?
Because it's a term that replaced all titles, meant to give impression that everyone's equal.
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>>39465899
Russians in actuality would have used tovarish (spelling?). People just use comrade because most people that would be mocking the Soviet Union in English, don't speak Russian
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>>39465924
Well "tovarishch" IS "comrade". It was "towarzysz" in polish, as in someone who accompanies you. Or "soudruh" in czech, as in someone in companion relationship with you.
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>>39465592
We really need a procedure for kicking countries out of the EU. Is there anyone who still wants Greece in? Except maybe Putin?
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>>39465952
It has also accrued a pejorative meaning because it was used in official situations and in relation to authority. Hence jokes like:

Little Johny came up to his teacher lady and asked her: "Comradess Teacher, would you like to fuck?"
*SMACK* - The teacher slaps him
"That was for that comradess. And now come on to the office you horndog..."
>>
>>39465921
>>39465924

I guess I wondered why tovarish (I never worry about spelling romanisations, I go phonetic, baby), if it was used so widely, didn't itself catch on for use in the popular portrayal. Why we had to find the equivalent word in English that sounds nothing like it to the ear, then hammer it hard for 50 years is beyond me.
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>>39466021
It's just odd that we didn't appropriate something that was so widely used, instead translating it to a totally dissimilar-sounding word. Now every college class in the land has one dick who at one point says "comrade" in an attempt at a russian accent.

I'm mad. Mad about title translation.
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>>39444234

Хyёвo. It was after ww2 and with Stalin.
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>>39446455
If it's happening in Ukraine,
remember that every family had at least one (usually moreso) member dead
because of The Great Famine induced by Stalin in the thirties (numbers of casualties are very various, from hundreds of thousends to tens of millions).
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>>39466133
*depending on source, it's all estimated numbers, cause Uncle Joe didn't want bodycount that could be atributed to him.
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>>39453749
The widows are all dead by now. They're also the reason russia was known for its surplus of grandmothers,
>>39463422
They're basically hostages. It's how NK and Cuba manage to let people go abroad without those people fleeing.
>>39464620
Sure, and then next thing you know we have corrupt officials willingly "loosing" their country in return for bribes and whoops it's cyberpunk now.
>>39465899
Comes from the Paris Commune, where everyone was called Friend.
>>
>>39447101
Dude, Gulag archipelago was working since twenties, jailing political prisoners in hundred of thousands
'47 is actually the moment when more lenient ways of post war semi-chaos are changed for more hardline ways of inner politics.
Remember that Stalins' invention of permament purge was first put in common use in the thirties and '47-'48 was time of reestabilishing (sp?) it.
>>
>>39466341
Also remember that before Stalin Purges were like those under Kruschev, where you just lost your job. Stalin changed it to losing your job and then getting shot.
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>>39466349
well, aside from the cheka and the terror and all that civil war/immediately post-civil war massacres and such, but sure
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>>39466382
Yeah, but Purges specifically referd to large amounts of people in the Party either losing their jobs or being shot.
>>
I feel like we ought to archive this thread. And, have a joke I don't think has been posted yet:

An old man is sent off by his wife to stand in line for meat. He waits patiently for hours, but just as he's about to step up to claim his dinner, the service window is shut and a sign put out saying that there was no more meat available.

This makes the old man angry, and unable to control himself, he launches into a very public tirade about the inadequacies of the Soviet system. However, his rant is interrupted when he is grabbed from behind and spun around to face a member of the secret police. The man doesn't say a word, but makes the shape of a gun with his hand, raising it to the old man's temple while shaking his head back and forth. Having made his point, the secret police man slips back into the crowd and disappears.

Returning home, the old man's wife sorrowfully asks, "Oh no, have they run out of meat again?" He old man replies, "It's worse that that. They've run out of bullets!"
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>>39466535
That reminds me another one:

It's 6 o'clock. It's an hour until the butcher's store opens but there's a line of people waiting already. At 7 the clerk peeks out of the door and says: "Opening hour is here, but the delivery of meat hasn't arrived yet. But be patient, meat will be available!"
The people are disgruntled but resigned to their fate and stay and wait.
After some three hours the clerk peeks out again and says: "The central called. The meat will be available but there will not be enough for everyone. The Jews can go home."
Several people leave the line and go home, the rest keeps waiting.
After another few hours the clerk comes out again and says: "The central called again. Regrettably there won't be any meat today, you can all go home."
Amid disappointed murmur someone shouts: "Those damned Jews won again!"
>>
>>39451867
Ernst Rohm and the SA leadership were just as bad as the main Nazi leadership in their own way.

But neither the Nazis or the SA were as fucking nasty as that bastard Reinhard Heydrich. I shudder to think what would have happened to the world with him in control of the Nazi state. The fucking /SS/ thought he was an ironhearted sonofabitch.
>>
>>39466659
God Bless Prague, that's all I have to say!
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>>39466535
The one I heard was under the Khrushchev era and a normal cop explained to him that things are getting better because just a few years ago he would have been shot.
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>>39465324
>the colonization
That's the one
>>
>>39466021
As well as not speaking Russian I'd say it's because "tovarish" just sounds... slightly odd.
I can't think of any English worlds that have similar sounds, or sounds next to each other in that way - anything that would end in "ish" is either one letter that dominates how the word sounds or a whole word.
A single syllable that's not clearly a word just sounds a little odd to the english-speaking ear
>>
>>39466634
>>39466535
a man stands in a line to get his cut of meat for the day, when he gets to the front of the line he finds it empty, he asks the clerk "you don't have any meat?" The clerk says "no, the butcher is across the street. I'm a fishmonger, I don't have any fish"
>>
>>39449339
Oh, I remeber sone:
"Stalin is giving a speech in great auditorium, of course whole place is mandatorily crowded,
when he is interrupted by someone sneezing.
Stalin asks: "who sneezed?"
Nobody responds.
Stalin commands: "execute the first row!"
People are taken out and shot.
Stalin returns to his speech.
After a while, there's another loud sneeze.
Stalin asks again: "who sneezed?"
Old, shaking with fear man stands up: "I did"
Stalin: "bless you, old timer"
>>
>>39466969
>Stalin: "bless you, old timer"
...and then orders him shot?
>>
>>39455397
THE PEOPLE WHO OWED THE MONEY SHOULD HAVE BEEN AUSTRIA!

More specifically the Royal Families of the former Austrian and Ottoman Empires.

But the bright lights of the Treaty board decided to slice up Europe twenty ways before anyone could pay the bill.

Versailles was an utterly, criminally incompetent peace treaty. It was _the most_ short-sighted, vindictive, indefensibly stringent and poorly crafted political document in human history.

Wilson waffled constantly, never deciding and sticking to his aims, even though by the end of the war we have the manpower and political clout to say "DO THIS" to Lloyd George and kinda get away with it, Clemenceau was allowed to be a complete bastard because, hey, he's French, they do that, and they are entitled to it. Lloyd George decided to carve up the Middle East and not let the houses of Ibn Saud and Ibn Hashem even talk unless Colonel Lawrence was in the room to scream at him, and pissed away a chance to keep Vietnam from becoming a Communist shithole in less than a century. And they all pissed off the government of Russia by funding White Russian and Black Russian private armies to interfere with the Revolution a year earlier.

I really wish Roosevelt had been allowed to work with the diplomatic corps. I honestly believe it could have been his last great work of peace. He had already shown that he could negotiate between to antagonistic powers before. But he was a Republican (what's worse, a New Yorker) and Wilson was a goddamn southern Democrat.
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>>39467119
The joke was that he executed several people just to know who to be polite to.
>>
>>39450957
>>39459891
we were laughing laudly when we heard that too, although it was different kind of laugh in the eighties...
>>39459469
(Sigh) someone on soviet sub accidentally launched IBMs on USA.
>>
>>39467123
Definitely the worst of both worlds - even if Clemenceau had got what he wanted, sure Germany would have been utterly fucked over, but as WWII and the fall of communism showed us, they can actually survive that.

Though Germany sending Lenin to Russia (via sealed train) to "distract" the Tsar has to go on record as one of the biggest fuckups in human history
>>
>>39466710
>>39466710
Amen and amen.
>>
>>39465324
Actually Japanese landed a company of troops from a submarine around the end of war.
Poor suckers were left alone in the area of size of Poland without any inhabitants.
Australians learned about the "invaders" and rescued them almost starved to death only after the end of war.
>>
>>39466004
>Johny
>Not Ivan
You fucked up that joke, anon, 8 years in gulag.
>>
>>39467317
There is a scale of stupid, and the lowest end has "sending Lenin to Moscow" and capped off with "invading Russia in late September."
>>
>>39467194
>it was different kind of laugh in the eighties...

"Blast door leading to underground launching facility at Minuteman Missile National Historic Site (South Dakota)"
>>
>>39446455
More or less, but look at interesting thing one of my university professors pointed out - If you look on the map and the range of Nazi advance, it would turn out that most fighting and civilian killing was done in Ukraine, Byelorussia, and Baltic State. Only big Russian city, seized for a longer time was Nizny Novogrod, I think.
So in the end, Nazi Invasion actually helped Russians with subduing all ethnic minorities.
>>
>>39467449
>or the next one is free
h-how much is the first one?
>>
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>>39462670
>Implying Santa Claus isn't based on a combination of it's European counterparts

Very interesting thread so far guys. I don't really know much about Soviet history other than that they accidentally drained one of the worlds greatest lakes and tried to cross breed woman with apes.
>>
>>39467123
>Versailles
>Vietnam
I think I am missing something.
>>
>>39467423
The scale of horrifying-death-toll-causing stupid?

Where does "all of North Korea" fall on it?
>>
>>39467556
They are not on the scale, as they refused to provide the data.
>>
>>39467497
>tried to cross breed woman with apes.
Urban myth.
>>39467535
Negotiators from vietnam showed up at multiple points during various peace conferences requesting independence from france.
>>
>>39450855

I've lost my sides.
>>
>>39467598
>>39467535


Ho Chi Minh himself shows up, gets snubbed by the French every time he even approaches the building.
>>
>>39467585
That sounds like it could be from a soviet joke
>>
Here's one of my favorites.
Khrushchev is giving a speech about how evil Stalin was when suddenly a voice from the audience shouts out "Why didn't you do anything about it then? You were a part of the government, why didn't you speak up?"
Khrushchev does not take this very well. "Guards!" he shouts. "Bring the heckler up here."
With some struggling, the heckler is brought up to Khrushchev. "Now," says Khrushchev, "guard, give me your pistol."
Khrushchev takes the pistol, puts it to the heckler's head. He then says "and now you know why I didn't speak up," before letting the heckler back into the audience.
>>
>>39467598
>>39467694
Excuse me, Ho Chi Minh, who at that point was young dish-washer, who was one of the founders of French Communist Party?
Are you seriously thinking that he should have been allowed to the table?
Beside that he at that point had absolutely no support or power in Asia?
>>
>>39467598
>Negotiators from vietnam showed up at multiple points during various peace conferences requesting independence from france.
And? Are you seriously suggesting that anybody would give independece to the colony/protectorate of one of the Great Powers?
>>
>>39467598
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ilya_Ivanovich_Ivanov#Human-ape_hybridization_experiments
There are plenty of references and external links. I don't know if it's true or not but it might provide OP with some ideas.

inb4 >using wikipedia
>>
>>39467729
I admit I tried to make it sound a bit like one.
Being from Central Europe makes it slightly easier.
>>
>>39450989
Emphasis on cheap. My economics teacher was a bit out there, and instead of teaching us about macroeconomics regaled us about her life in the USSR. Like how her father was a retired veteran but because the local branch that pays these veterans was short on cash, they paid his pension with a bag of pasta.

And because they had to subsist on a year with nothing but that bag of pasta, she now has a hatred of all pasta.

And all I did was microwave some ravioli in the break room...



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