You wake up on the floor, your arms crossed over your head for protection, and the horrible banging sound comes again. It sounds a lot like someone's trying to kick a door off its fucking hinges.

“ADMIIIRAAAAAAAAAAAAAL!” the bright voice of Kongou bellows through the door. “IT'S EIGHT BONG AND ALL'S WELL! WAKEY WAKEY SHIPS ARE SHAKEY!”

What the fuck does that even mean?

“IF YOU DON'T COME OUT BY THE COUNT OF TEN, KONGOU'S COMING IN!”

>Oh shit oh fuck oh Christ get out there
>FUCK this shit. Hide!
>Other?

>>39696337
The shit we put up with for best grill.

>>39696352
>Oh shit oh fuck oh Christ get out there

Fleeeeeee!!!! As cute as Kongou's puppy-dog loyalty is, its still kinda scary.

>>39696352
>Whip out your dick.

Weapons grade, ready to sink that battleship.

>>39696352
>Oh shit oh fuck oh Christ get out there
>Where the fuck are we?

>>39696352
>FUCK this shit. Hide!

>>39696352
>FUCK this shit. Hide!

>>39696352
>I'm up! I'M UP! SHUT UP!

>>39696352
>FUCK this shit. Hide!

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>>39696352
>FUCK this shit. Hide!
Fucking PANIC.

When did we become Kongou's target? What the fuck happened?

>>39696352
>>Oh shit oh fuck oh Christ get out there

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>>39696352
>Other: Hobble out the door armed with only your boxers and cane, and give Kongou a LOOK.

>>39696352
>Other
Get off the floor and start putting on our uniform, get our face bitch-slapped by the ghost of Patton, and get ready to face another day.

>>39696352
"THE FUCK DOES EIGHT O BONG MEAN?"

>>39696452
You say that like it's a bad thing.

>CLIMB OUT THE WINDOW, AVOID AT ALL COSTS.

>>39696352
>Oh shit oh fuck oh Christ get out there
No doubt Kongou has a sniffer powerful enough find dicks no matter where they might be.

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>>39696352
>Oh shit oh fuck oh Christ get out there
Nooo'ooope.gif

>>39696352

Wait, are we still Settle, or have we become the associate Jap Admiral?

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>>39696495
>>39696408
Kongo best ship

>>39696456
This. Toss in a joke about how you'll give her the shaft and fuck will it hurt while waving your cane around.

>>39696518
>kongo
>on watch

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>>39696518

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>>39696515
That could be an explanation. Is it fusonese admiral adventures tiem now?

>>39696352
>>Oh shit oh fuck oh Christ get out there

>>39696456
Sure why not. Not like anything else is better.

>>39696352
>>Other: Hobble out the door armed with only your boxers and cane, and give Kongou a LOOK.

>>39696352
"YOU WON'T BE TAKING ME ALIVE, YOU HEAR! THE WEE MEN WON'T TAKE ME ALIVE!"

planefag, why are there no knock knock jokes about America?

BECAUSE FREEDOM RINGS

>>39696337
>>FUCK this shit. Hide!

>>39696518
Not saying she isn't. And loyalty is admirable...but....

>>39696518
Wait a minute.
That's not Kongo...

>>39696619
Like the ring in your ears after a breaching charge?

>>39696644
Are you blind? How can you not recognize the best ship in the fleet?

>>39696646
Wear earpro, faggot, and your ears won't be ringing as badly. Seriously, that's like one of the most common sense rules of shooting

>>39696654
Because it's not Houshou either.

>>39696352
>Give no fucks and go about your normal morning routine

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>>39696668
>Houshou
>not midtier at best

Sorry I don't have any laughing 2hu faces.

Planefag, get an ask.fm you lazy bum!

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>>39696695

got yer back niggah

>>39696352
>FUCK this shit. Hide!

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>>39696704
>let us spam you with a zillion questions you haven't actually thought of answers to yet and are carefully writing around the fact of and/or are waiting to decide on them later for maximum troll potential!

anon, I got a secret for ya

>>39696727

what if i just wanna know your dick size

>>39696704
>Make up shit for us to fulfill our curiosity/so others can spam you!

nigga do you know who he fucking is

>>39696727
Please, I've seen other ask.fms, you'll just get questions about when their waifu will show up.

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>>39696695

>see this thread
>planefag
>wut.jpg
>giant girls who are boats
>wut.webm

Goddammit Japan, why do you do these things?

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>>39696727
GRAF SPEE WHEN?

>>39696704
>ask.fm
>some gay form of social media
>all it'll be filled with would be "X QUEST WHEN, Y LEWDS WHEN, WHY DON'T YOU RUN MORE OFTEN" etc, etc.

Why? It'd serve no purpose other than for anons like you to be creepy stalkers.

>>39696727
*shipslut sees admiral's dickjpg*

>>39696758
That don't look like 2hus to me. You blind or something?

>>39696759
No no no, you've got it all wrong.

The girls are normal-sized.

>>39696727
>>39696762

Oddly, Planefag is the only one of the QMs that I don't have questions for.

Probably because the lack of sense in his quests is what I like.

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>>39696352
>Getting charged by Kongou
Despair, but also an erection.

>>39696352
>>Oh shit oh fuck oh Christ get out there

>>39696791
Okay, so it's girls with ship attachments zipping around in the water...

I don't really see the military value. Strike Witches work because magic, and air combat is all about maneuverability, which tiny witches have in spades. But in the water, they've got much less freedom of movement.

How does this system work?

>>39696759

try watching the fucking anime, even

the cognitive dissonance. it feels like your brain is sliding around on space lube

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>>39696352
>FUCK this shit. Hide!

>>39696840
They aren't normal humans, so they take the same damage a normal ship would.

Or something, who cares it's all about the waifus anyway.

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>>39696776
wrong quest

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>>39696840
They have the same firepower as the real thing with a much smaller cross section and maintenance.

Also no human crew.

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“WHAT THE FUCK IS EIGHT-BONG, YOU NUT?” you cry blindly as you flail your way upright. You seem to have managed to get your pants and jacket off, but your undershirt is rumpled as hell. There's a hazy bit between the moment you slumped against a wall and slid down it, laughing so hard you were out of breath to stand, and stumbling in the door of your apartment.

“EIGHT-O-CLOCK ADMIRAL! YOU'RE LATE!”

You glare blearily at the shattered remains of the alarm clock against the far wall. Oh. Right. You never did set your watch or your phone to replace that, did you? On second thought, maybe that's a good thing. Neither of them are cheap.

“OOOOOOOOOOONE!”

“God dammit, I'm not dressed.”

“A LIKELY STORY! TWOOOOOOOOOOOO!”

You look around angrily for your cane before you remember that you handed it to a CV yesterday, who then applied it to the skull of another CV... ship... girl... thing...

… it is too fucking early for this bullshit.

“TEN!”

The thing about deadbolts is that they're only as strong as the thin strip of trim wood that retains them. This thin strip snaps before the sheer power of Kongou's boundless enthusiasm. She stands in the doorway triumphant. “OHIAO GOZAIMASU ADMIRAL~”

“Who... sent you?” you ask blearily.

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>>39696913

“Kongou, no!” Another girl has her hands wrapped around Kongou's slender bicep, but she just drags the girl over the threshold with her as she charges in. “Kongou, he has no pants on!”

“Yeah, I got no pants on,” you say with mild hope – maybe that will get Kongou the fuck out of here. But she doesn't care – she doesn't even look at your boxers, much less your -

- the comforter goes flying off the bed as you drag one corner over your injured thigh, covering the ugly evidence of your old injury. “I'M NOT DRESSED!” you thunder.

“No problem!” Kongou says, giving you a big thumbs-up and a smile. “WE'RE FROM THE ADMIRAL, AND WE'RE HERE TO HELP!”

You clap one hand over your eyes. “Please get the fuck out.”

“Nooooooooope~” Kongou says. “Kirishima, bring the kettle!” After a moment, they both vanish into the kitchenette, leaving you with a clear path to the door.

>BAIL
>Go shave, shower, take a few painkillers and make yourself presentable. Goto wants your ass on a platter and he sent them to retrieve you for the slaughter.
>CALL FOR BACKUP

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>>39696827

>>39696933
>Go shave, shower, take a few painkillers and make yourself presentable. Goto wants your ass on a platter and he sent them to retrieve you for the slaughter.

>>39696933
>>Go shave, shower, take a few painkillers and make yourself presentable. Goto wants your ass on a platter and he sent them to retrieve you for the slaughter.

>>39696840
All the firepower and armor of a real ship with a much smaller cross-section.
Potentially capable of being deployed on land.
Demonstrably superhuman.

Reasons are plenty, really.

>>39696933
>>Go shave, shower, take a few painkillers and make yourself presentable. Goto wants your ass on a platter and he sent them to retrieve you for the slaughter.

>>39696933
>Go shave, shower, take a few painkillers and make yourself presentable. Goto wants your ass on a platter and he sent them to retrieve you for the slaughter.

Goto shall pay. Somehow.

>>39696933
>Go shave, shower, take a few painkillers and make yourself presentable. Goto wants your ass on a platter and he sent them to retrieve you for the slaughter.

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>>39696933
>Go shave, shower, take a few painkillers and make yourself presentable. Goto wants your ass on a platter and he sent them to retrieve you for the slaughter.

>>39696933
>Go shave, shower, take a few painkillers and make yourself presentable. Goto wants your ass on a platter and he sent them to retrieve you for the slaughter.

I suppose we've had enough of a reprieve.

>>39696957
cheaper than normal ships too!

>>39696933
>>Go shave, shower, take a few painkillers and make yourself presentable. Goto wants your ass on a platter and he sent them to retrieve you for the slaughter.

Let's be professional.

>>39696933
>Go shave, shower, take a few painkillers and make yourself presentable. Goto wants your ass on a platter and he sent them to retrieve you for the slaughter.

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>>39696933
>Go shave, shower, take a few painkillers and make yourself presentable. Goto wants your ass on a platter and he sent them to retrieve you for the slaughter.
Surrender to the misery, embrace it, and slip softly into death.

>>39696933
>>Go shave, shower, take a few painkillers and make yourself presentable. Goto wants your ass on a platter and he sent them to retrieve you for the slaughter.

>>39696982
Consider the CV and BB food expenses.

>>39697007
Food costs less than oil.

>>39696933
>>Go shave, shower, take a few painkillers and make yourself presentable. Goto wants your ass on a platter and he sent them to retrieve you for the slaughter.

>>39697024
It was a (bad) joke but yes you're right.

>>39697007
Capital shipgirls are certainly inhumanly big eaters, but I'm pretty sure even they don't outeat what the entire crew of an actual CV or BB would require, let alone the cost fuel, ammo, repair materials, etc.

>>39696933
>Go shave, shower, take a few painkillers and make yourself presentable. Goto wants your ass on a platter and he sent them to retrieve you for the slaughter.

>>39696933

Go shave or something. Then get some lube. IT"S TIME TO STICK THAT CANE IN GOTO.

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>>39697085
Why are you advocating violence against someone who did nothing wrong?

CALLED, WRITING, ETC.

Sammy beat down when?

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>>39697105
Well, Settle is an American.
And as an American myself, I can speak with authority on matters of reckless violence.

I just heard of the decommissioning of a ship somewhat important to the history of my country today.

Now I think I begin to see the reverence and respect held for ships and why it is a bad idea to fuck them.

>>39697105

Not violence. Hot sweaty balls-touching gay sex. With a cane.

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Yorktown

>>39697163
MAN LOVE. CALL IT MAN LOVE. BURNING MAN LOVE.

>>39697199

if it burns, anon, you should see a doctor

>>39697214
It's as easy as A-B-C,
One-Two-Three,
If you get with me, and it burns when you pee,
You probably got an STD, Yeah~

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Dangnabbit I'm late for KCQ

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>>39697199
Did someone say BURNING LOVE???
>https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=a8PzBAuW_qg

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>>39697426
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tA450yRJ6Cs

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>>39697426
Thanks anon, needed that!

>>39697494
Yuudachi a shit.

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>>39697494
Crix pls

>>39697496
The Cyber Beast Force aims to please.

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>>39697514
She's ok.

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Kongou is best shipslut.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zRnclastqkA

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>>39697565
No anon, the best shipslut is Ra Cailum.

>www.youtube.com/watch?v=5HcBTOZDD8M

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>>39697565
There is no best. All girls are great.

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>>39697622
dat filename

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>>39697565
I respectfully disagree, but to each their own.

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>>39697622
>>39697631
So do they argue about ladders and stepladders too?

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every thread

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You manage to load yourself into the shower and emerge looking clean, dressed and – well, ship-shape. There's a joke in there somewhere but you just can't be arsed, this early. You stumble into the kitchenette to find Kongou bouncing around (in more ways than one; whatever the hell those traditional miko outfits use for support isn't cutting it,) with a teacup in one hand as her other raids your kitchenette for supplies. You gaze around in wonder – you haven't even been in here since you arrived and you had no idea it was stocked. Kongou seems to be making toast – you think. There's bread, and spices, and butter... some operation is going on involving bread.

“Good morning, Admiral~” she singsongs, and before you can recover your ass is in a chair and you're sitting at the tiny table across from Kongou's sister ship... Kirishima? The name goes floating through your head, searching for something to connect with.

“Teatime, teitoku!” Kongou swoops in and deposits a large, bog-standard American coffee mug before you with a dark liquid. You grope it up and sip at it before you realize it is, indeed, tea. You don't like it one damn bit, but it's liquid and you remember it has caffeine in it, so down it goes.

“Didn't even know this place had a teakettle,” you mumble.

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>>39697668

“It doesn't,” Kirishima replies as she takes a seat across from you. “Kongou has an electric teakettle.”

“That's right!” Kongou says brightly from the counter as she snatches two more pieces of toast out of midair as the toaster ejects them. “I'm always ready to make tea for my teitoku, and he loves it!”

“Yes,” Kirishima says, giving you a small, knowing smile. “Doesn't he just?”

A plate of toast hits the table hard, clattering loudly enough to make you both jump an inch out of your chairs. “Of course he does,” Kongou says, waving the end of a butterknife at Kirishima. “But don't worry, sister. You're still the light of my life!”

The world “light” goes floating through your head, searching for something to connect with.

A moment later, you wipe the sleep from your eyes and focus on the girl sitting across from you. “You're Kirishima.”

“That's right!” she says, with a proud smile. “Kongou-class battleship Kirishima, at your service!”

“And you wear glasses?”

She touches her frames proudly. “Aren't they sharp-looking? I'm the brains of the family, you know.” You see the corner of Kongou's mouth twitch, but she doesn't turn away from her work of buttering toast at the counter.

“Glasses.” You smile. “Heh.”

Kirishima gives you a funny look. “Is that funny?”

>Yes. Yes it is.
>No. No!
>CHANGE THE GODDAMN SUBJECT [SPECIFY]

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>>39697151
Is this your girl anon?

>>39697691
>Yes. Yes it is.

>>39697691
>>Yes. Yes it is.
Is this a WW2 reference I don't know about?

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>>39697691
>Other: They look good on you *SMOOTH AS FUCKING GLASS*

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>>39697691
>Yes. Yes it is.
Hue
HUEHUEHUE

>>39697652
Where my Macon at

>>39697691
>Yes. Yes it is.

Ask how pissed off goto was when he sent them

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>>39697602
Wow, I'm pretty sure alpha gaiden gave the Ra Calium better animations for the missiles.

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>>39697691
>Yes. Yes it is.

Tea Time, can't complain. We can, however, find whatever we want funny, whether the subject likes it or not.

>>39697719
I am curious as well.

>>39697698
Canadians use destroyers as flagships?

>>39697767
This one,
>>39697728
and this one for Banter's sake.
Kongo would understand, She's from England.

>>39697691

"Yes, Yes it is. Now where the fuck were you when we needed you."

>>39697728
this.

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>>39697771
A lot of animation complaints for Z3 as a whole, to be honest.

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>>39697794
Well it's not like people care for cruisers or battleships these days.

>>39697691
"No, they look good on you."

Then take a moment to process what we just said and panic.

>>39697728
Is that Haruna in Hestia's outfit, or Hestia with Haruna's headpiece?

>>39697691
>>Yes. Yes it is.

>>39697794
That's what happens when you can't afford aircraft carriers.

Not everyone can be in the "carrier club".

>>39697691
>>CHANGE THE GODDAMN SUBJECT [SPECIFY]

"HOW ABOUT SOME SUGAR?"

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>>39697835
It's Haruna.

>>39697719

Yes. Yes, it is~

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>>39697826
all the budget went to unicorn and Nu

>>39697691
>CHANGE THE GODDAMN SUBJECT [SPECIFY]
>"Do either of you know what Arizona is up to?"

>>39697830
>>39697846
Ahhh true.

>>39697846
Canada never really needed a carrier though. We are no longer patrolling the Atlantic route and protecting her Northern territories are better done with float planes.

>>39697691

>They're very nice. So how's Goto feeling this morning?

A bit of fore-warning.

>>39697794
West Edmonton Mall has almost as much Naval power as Canada. They've got more submarines than Canada.

>>39697910
The submarine there no longer works.

And their sub never caught fire by itself without taking a hit.

>>39697910
There is a pirate ship in the mall. That counts as navy right?

>>39697884
And if we needed a carrier, we could just re-fit the Habakkuk.

>>39697930
Subs are for faggots anyway. We fuck subs, fuck steering them.

>>39697964
Or the back half of the mogami... Though I suppose that could only launch scout planes.

>>39697964
I, for one, would love to have a piece of ice as a carrier.

>>39697977
We did invent the sonar after all.

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>>39697691
>[x] Other: No, they look good on you.

>>39697964
We used to have British carriers in WW II to patrol the Atlantic for U-boats, and we had grain carriers that can launch but never retrieve planes.

But it is all good because Canadians probably drop polar bears from planes which can wipe out entire fleets by themselves.

>>39697691
>Yes. Yes it is.

I have no idea what's supposed to be funny, and I would like to know.

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Weird things happen when characters fall asleep in this quest.

>>39698002
We could make them as large as we want. Large enough to even put a town on them. A town with schools.

>>39697691
>>39698011
This.
>[x] Other: No, they look good on you.

>>39697771
Could be worse, anon. Pretty much anything Full Metal Panic!-related had better animations in J and W (GBA and DS games respectively). Compared to those two, the first Z3 had:

>no alternate animations for Lambda Driver-boosted attacks
>no combination attacks
>no camera angle switching
>"hey, if we rely on cut-ins of the Arbalest, we won't need to animate it as much! GENIUS."

>>39697877
It's too bad, because Z3 seemed rushed in general. All the progress of Z2 wasted on a retcon.

>>39698047

I miss BlackJack.

>>39698047
Are we going to make tank driving a sport too?

>>39698038
Just like any other quest then.

>>39698038

DON'T REMIND ME

AKAGI IS WAIFU MATERIAL AND I SUNK MIINE TO NOT GET A SUB.

>>39698068

It already is a sport. It's typically played on a rather large pitch, and though there are commonly agreed-upon rules, some people like to cheat!

>>39697964
Did you Canadian anons salute your Christmas Cake destroyer her final farewell today?

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>>39698068
>>39698081
Fick ja

>>39698054
>SRW J
Muh nigga
Katia a best

>>39698081
You do?

Some day I regret not joining the army. But now I can only join the medical corp and I only get to fix the people who messes around with the tanks.

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>>39698106
Hell yeah, motherfucker. SRW J was just ridiculously amazing in general.

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>>39697846

>>39697719
>>39697794
Kirishima got it rough in one of those endless naval battles around Guadalcanal because she left her searchlights on far too long. Hard to miss a superstructure Jap BB sized when it's got searchlights on everywhere
>>39697691
>CHANGE THE GODDAMN SUBJECT [SPECIFY]
"Does Kongou always have such...dynamic entries?"

So what kind of modern stuff our shipgirls like?

Music? Pop-Culture? The fact that Coca Cola's still around (We also need to find out how much they drink....)?

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>>39697691
>I'm always ready to make tea for my teitoku, and he loves it!

This, this is why Kongou is my favorite. The genki, the devotion, the love of tea. Top waifu material.

>>39698152

You should ask them!

>>39698031
Super Drop Bears!

>>39698064
I miss him too. Hopefully he's back soon.

>>39698068
Of course.

>>39698147
Ahhh thanks. She was that one who was dumb enough to get her whole fleet killed then fired on her own ships?

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>>39698135
We await SRW J's OG debut with bated breath, fellow Moon Knight!
>www.youtube.com/watch?v=PvM5YCvdUZM

>>39698152
I hear some of them have a thing for imageboard shitposting.

>>39697691
>Other: They look nice on you.

THat and she is really the most serious and mature sibling of Kongou's

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>>39698143
>Britbong speaking broken english

>>39698172
Get to writing fap angel!

>>39698197
Polanball isnt supposed too

>>39698152
I bet they complain about how "Coke used to be in glass bottles instead of plastic crap"

>>39698192
Dunno this is assuming they don't cut back on things due to how badly 2ndOGs did.

Also something to note: Kongou may be dynamic, but you can't go wrong with her or her sisters. (same goes for the Dragon family)

>>39698229
Oh man, I remember that cutscene circling around the interwebs a couple of years back, something about nuking the moon.

THAT GODDAMN RED HERRING

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>>39698183
IIRC Kirishima wasn't one of the ships who fucked up her targeting in the melee, but I'm not positive about that. The reason why she's often portrayed as a brawler in Kancolle stuff is because in the same battle she managed to effectively knock out the SoDak (which was 20 years younger and an actual battleship) before getting stomped by the Washington because of aforementioned searchlight issues

>>39698172
Note to self: engage in casul conversation when there's not important shit to do.

>>39698289
So we'll never know, then?

>>39698258
I don't mean J would be left out, just that the animation budget may take some big hits. I suspect 2ndOGs did badly due to how the Z3 games turned out.

>>39698289
Isn't that never at the rate things go?

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>>39698281
In other words she has Kenji-vision

>>39698289
Go home bigdad

>>39698313
I have faith in BamCo...

>>39698281
Ahh thanks. So a competent Nip ship.

I hope we don't antagonize her too much.

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Toot toot best destroyers coming through

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>>39698281
Hope the burger defence force guy from the other thread doesn't see this

>>39698306
>>39698313
Pretty much, yes.

>>39698340
What?

>>39698435
>implying the Nip defense force fag wasn't as bad

>>39697771
>Dat Zeta II
Hue

>>39698416
>any destroyer that doesn't have VLS
>best
C'mon. Don't make me laugh.

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>>39698340
It was actually a problem for more than just her. IJN doctrine loved them some night battles, and they were only SUPPOSED to leave their searchlights on long enough to acquire the target, then switch them off to fire. However, a lot of captains got what Hara called "shell-drunk" and forgot to turn off their searchlights, quite effectively illuminating them for the Americans who still hadn't quite got a hold of this whole night-brawl thing. Off the top of my head I KNOW it sank Akatsuki (RIP DesDiv 6) and nearly sank Hara's ship in addition to the Hiei and Kirishima, but I know it happened to more...just can't recall them
>>39698399
Competent and a little bit lucky. One of Kirishima's rounds knocked out SoDak's comms and gunnery, rendering her pretty much useless.

>>39698435
>Dat Special Needs sub in the back
Maruyu is totally legit, guys. The army was on top of things when they built their own submarine.

>>39698461
I'm a fan of VLS too, but when the Scarlet-class use their Gungnir and Laevatein...

>>39698451
Kenji-vision=short-sighted

>>39698456
Too much poorly informed debate in last thread.

>>39698491
In all fairness, it was a ghetto transport sub.

Yeah, the fact that they spent resources on transport subs does speak volumes

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It's early, you had a rough night, and you haven't even had your caffeine fix yet. There's no real chance of you stifling that giggle before it gets out. Kirishima's face falls into a frown, and she crosses her arms and sniffs as she looks away from you.

“Sorry,” you reply. “It's nothing.”

“It's *something,*” she insists. “My vision's just fine, thank you very much – and so are my night optics!” Her head snaps back to you, and she kicks you under the table. She slipped her sandals off at the door, because her small and very human foot inflicts no damage.

“Ara ara~” Kongou says with a completely unconvincing lilt in her voice. “Is someone inviting Admiral Settle to night battle?”

“Hmph!” Kirmishima says. “Yankee torpedoes, his probably runs hot and wears out before it leaves the tube!”

You open your mouth to tell them both to get the hell out of your kitchenette, and Kongou promptly stuffs a piece of toast in it – which proves to have sugar and cinnamon coating the buttered surface. You're hungry enough that it makes you bite down instinctively. “Now now,” Kongou says. “Don't listen to Kirishima. She doesn't even need those glasses.”

“What!?”

Kongou twirls and snatches the glasses right off Kirishima's face, sliding them onto her own. “See? No refraction. Just flat plastic inserts!”

“H-hey! Give those back!” Kirishima looks stricken. Kongou returns them, smiling. “They're real frames, but she just wears them for style.”

“Hmph!” Kirishima says as she puts her glasses back on. “Long hair, no optical enhancement – you're too old-fashioned, Kongou?”

“Look what you're wearing, dess~”

“N-no fair!”

You finish your toast and slap your palms against the table to get their attention. “Ladies. Please. What did Admiral Goto say to you, exactly?”

>>39698491

As is fighting with the IJN

>>39698486
>HARHAR WITNESS OUR NIGHT SUPERIORITY FILTHY GAIJIN
>ship immediately gets lit up by 16 inchers

>>39698530
>“Is someone inviting Admiral Settle to night battle?”
>“Yankee torpedoes, his probably runs hot and wears out before it leaves the tube!”

The ship sluts are so sexual.

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>>39698530
“Just that you might need help getting ready this morning,” Kirishima says, her cheeks a little flushed as she shoots lidded-eyed looks at Kongou, who's as oblivious and bouncy as ever.

“And he didn't seem pissed?”

“No?” Kirishima shrugs. “Hard to tell with him, when Kongou's around-”

“Because I lift the Admiral's spirits with my BURNING LOOOOOOOOVE!” she exclaims as she crams a piece of toast in Kirishima's mouth. “Isn't that right?”

“Nooufffff-” the other girl tries to object, but Kongou just pinches her chin and starts moving it up and down. “Isn't. That. Riiiiiight~” Kirishima rolls her eyes, but chews dutifully. Kongou moves between you both, silencing any further attempt at communication by stuffing pieces of toast in your mouths in turn until it's all gone. Then she scoops everything up, dumps it in the sink (including the paper plate she served the toast on, and the unplugged toaster,) and slips her arm into yours. “Ready, Admiral?”

“Uh, is this-”

“You lost your cane again, so let the Kongou sisters be your support!” she exclaims, placing a splayed hand on her own breast. “We are always the hope and pride and support of our Admrials, the reliable four-ship fast battlewagon band!”

Kirishima follows suit, slipping her arm into your left, flanking you. “There's worse places to be, Admiral Settle,” she says with a wink. Together, they lead you out of the kitchenette and straight into the splintering impact of an end-table swung like a baseball bat.

“What?”

“WHHAAaAaAaAaAaAaAaAaAaAaAaAaA!” Kongou adds as the splintered remnants of one wooden leg catch her across the chin and send her spinning like a top, in place. Then something snatches you up in arms that feel like bands of steel; your eyes are blinded by the bright morning sun and you realize -

- you're being kidnapped.

>In the middle of Yokosuka Naval Base? Sucks to be them.
>I STILL HAVE MY PHONE!
>BLOW THE RAPE WHISTLE!

>>39698571
>>In the middle of Yokosuka Naval Base? Sucks to be them.
Time for Hate to use his MARSOC skills

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>>39698530
>“Hmph!” Kirmishima says. “Yankee torpedoes, his probably runs hot and wears out before it leaves the tube!”
Hawawawa

>>39698571
>>BLOW THE RAPE WHISTLE!

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>>39698537

Exactly. SoDak was disabled (and apparently this is all that is focused on in the Kancolle Japanese fandom/the games) but USS Washington was there, and had been tracking her for many minutes on (gasp) new-fangled radar! And when she turned on her lights and fired on the SoDak, there was no doubt as to it being a hostile contact.

Long story short, Kirishima's belt armor wasn't enough to save her.

>>39698571
>In the middle of Yokosuka Naval Base? Sucks to be them.

>>39698571
>In the middle of Yokosuka Naval Base? Sucks to be them.

>>39698571
>>In the middle of Yokosuka Naval Base? Sucks to be them.

>>39698571
>>BLOW THE RAPE WHISTLE!
Maybe it'll do something!

>>39698571
Hey, our ship daughters are coming to rescue our admiral from any possible nip ship bothering him.

>>39698571
>>In the middle of Yokosuka Naval Base? Sucks to be them.

Then we kick them. While yelling "HATE, LET LOOSE THE DOGS OF WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAR"

>>39698571
>>In the middle of Yokosuka Naval Base? Sucks to be them.

>>39698571
>BLOW THE RAPE WHISTLE!
SUMMON THE CORGIHORDE TO PROTECT US!

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>>39698571
>In the middle of Yokosuka Naval Base? Sucks to be them.

>>39698607
It is quite ironic that for all their pursuit of qualitative excellence the IJN never got around to having good radars and FCS.

>>39698601
I am not sure if I understood the joke or the image.

Did some American pilot really land on a nip CV?

>>39698571
>In the middle of Yokosuka Naval Base? Sucks to be them.

>>39698571
>“There's worse places to be, Admiral Settle,” she says with a wink.

Kirishima wants Settle's D. I'd a Kirishima.

Also I'd think she'd be a competent Secretary

>>In the middle of Yokosuka Naval Base? Sucks to be them.

>>39698571
>>In the middle of Yokosuka Naval Base? Sucks to be them.
They have angered the Kongou, most likely, by interfering in her duties.

They will not see the end of this day.

>>39698571
>In the middle of Yokosuka Naval Base? Sucks to be them.

THE RAPE WHISTLE DOES NOTHING!

>>39698596

Nope. well, probably, the JSMDF security is kinda...

Ok, fucking, look, there's a fucking reason I'm here, and you're fucking right, but fucked if I'm not gonna grouse, it's an infantryman's right.

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>>39698571
>In the middle of Yokosuka Naval Base? Sucks to be them.
You know what? This is just going to be a common thing. Give in now and make it easy.

>>39698501
Don't get me wrong, I would totally have tea with Remilia.

But guns <<< missiles in the water nowadays.

>>39698571
>[x] I STILL HAVE MY PHONE!
I don't see an option to not panic, but whatever.

>>39698607
It's quite ironic for all their pursuit of qualitative superiority that the IJN never got good radar or FCS.

>>39698571
Is the rape whistle a meme now?

>>39698571
>SUMMON THE CORGIS!
WOOF WOOF NIGGER!

>>39698607
For 16 shells to hit directly, though, is quite a feat.

The gunners must be having heck of a day.

>>39698631
Jap radar research was a fucking nightmare. IIRC the IJA and IJN had entirely separate programs that didn't share fucking data because they hated each other so much.
>FIRUTHY PIG DOG GAIJIN CANNOT MATCH GRORIOUS NIPPON BANZAI SPIRIT ONE THOUSAND SHATTERED JEWELS
>>39698607
In Kirishima's meager defense those early battles were brawls much more than they were any sort of organized naval action.
>>39698571
>just...fuck it. It's too early
dat Kirishima tho

>>39698671
Say it with me anon, Radar assisted gunnery.

>>39698657
nice rhyme, devil dog

>>39698657
Verily, a right that no one in their right mind would impinge on.

>>39698687
radar didn't come into it though, they were firing at her from 2 km out, practically point blank.

>>39698571
Okay, so Is it Arizona, Sammy, or Hornet?

Or Willie?

>>39698687
Fair enough. Was it actually computer radar guided or just a radar operator relaying the coordinates to the gunner who adjust the angles?

>>39698641
I don't...think so, but I know that there were a handful of times where Jap planes tried to land on American CVs. The carriers knew because the Japs and Americans flew different pre-landing paths. IIRC Jap was clockwise, American was counter-clockwise

>>39698719
Neither.

It's North Carolina

>>39698719
I hope it is Willie.

Protecting her crew members.

Or Big E. Or Yorktown.

>>39698733
The pilots all mis-identified their ship? Heck of a mistake.

>>39698571
>BLOW THE RAPE WHISTLE!

Let slip the derps of war!

Fuck! Where's that pick of a Corgi?

>>39698668
>Is the rape whistle a meme now?

Think about it.

WHISTLE.

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>>39698571
Save us, best Kongou-class!

>>39698730
Well it wasn't computer assisted like we think of it today. More like it did computations on the range and angle of deflection and relayed that to the gunners....I think.

WW2 gunnery isn't my strong point.

>>39698756
It was later in the evening

>>39698719
Ship girl beating other ship girls over the head with a table leg and giving 0 fucks?

It must be Yandere Arizona.

Run for your lives

>>39698712
>what is target aqquisition

Calling it overwhelmingly for SUCKS TO BE THEM also I need to find more bagel chips these things are amazing

>>39698719
No. It's A GUNDAM

>>39698571
>>In the middle of Yokosuka Naval Base? Sucks to be them.

My money's on it being Arizona.

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>>39698571
>>In the middle of Yokosuka Naval Base? Sucks to be them.

>>39698762
>Whistle
THE HOUNDS

>>39698769
Thanks anon!

>>39698719
>Or Willie?

>yfw Willie has a 6th sense for when US citizens are about to be hurt by ANYTHING
>yfw Willie is Batman in her off hours

>>39698778
Why on earth would we run from that?

>>39698730
>>39698769
mechanical computer
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mark_I_Fire_Control_Computer

Basically magic, you point the director at the ship and the computer does the work. In comparison the Japs had to do this by hand.

Are we ever going to get minelayers? Because I want to see the best goddamn name the USN has ever put to a ship. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/USS_Terror_%28CM-5%29

>>39698719
Probably some ships pissed that we inducted Crab into The Mysteries.

>>39698800
Not to mention it cuts down the number of people working.

>>39698810
>witches will kill you if you know the secret of male magic!

Wow someone made the connection!

>>39698800
...So basically the IJN was playing artilleryman while the USN was playing cowadooty


HOW, exactly, did they think they stood a chance against the US again?

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>>39698762
Dank head homo. Dank.

>>39698571
>I STILL HAVE MY PHONE!

>>39698796
>Why would we run
>from a Yandere

Gee I don't know. Something along the lines of WANTING TO FUCKING LIVE WITH OUR BOLLOCKS INTACT!

Where are the fucking Corgis, one ship girl can't kill all of them.

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>>39698660
Get kidnapped easy!

>>39698663
Yeah, can't argue with that.

>>39698607
>Getting a hit on the rudder
Sasuga US Navy

>>39698800
The level of sophistication back then still surprises me.

>>39698840
They didn't think American Production would be able to recoup the losses from Pearl Harbor.

>>39698840
YAMATO DASHI

>>39698840
I wonder that every day.

>>39698819
It's not so much that, it's the speed. There's no way even a hundred people can be as fast as a machine, especially when both ships are maneuvering and everything is changing by the second.

>>39698840
Exactly. They'd foreseen a pivotal duel between BB lines like Sushi-ma or Jutland, and reality didn't play out that way.

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>>39698796
Willie gets a lot of shit she doesn't deserve, I wouldn't be surprised if she's actually real good at combat of any kind.

Also she's adorable.

>>39698854
Yandere are only dangerous to your balls if you're unfaithful. Given a proper application of love, affection, headpats, and torpedos wink wink nudge nudge there is nothing to fear from a yandere

>>39698869
She good at the battle to be Hate's daughteru.

>>39698840
Well, early in the war the USN hadn't quite figured out how to most effectively use radar and a lot of captains didn't trust it. They also had no idea of the Long Lance's true potential. The reasons why they thought they could win are way way to complicated to simply explain, but an incredibly over-broad generalization is "our ships are better, our men are better, we have YAMATO DAMASHII, and the filthy gaijin can't stomach a fight"

>>39698869
I wouldn't trust Willie to operate a toaster.

I would however, trust her with my life.

>>39698869
Now Willie got Sammy as her fleet commander, she will be amazing.

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>>39698887
>Hate Daughteruing the Willie
TEITOKU DOORI

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>>39698875
Nothing wrong with yanderes at all. All they need is head pats and attention.

Isn't that right planefag?

Go on. Headpat your imouto.
I dare you.

>>39698901
I actually fear for her, due to that little tidbit.

>>39698857
How does one hit a rudder?

It is under water. It takes incredible amounts of calculation for water entry to hit it.

>>39698875
Rule 1 is that you never stick your dick in crazy. If the only way to keep someone from going on a murder spree is to unerringly spoil them both emotionally and sexually, then they should be committed.

>>39698840
The stupid fuckers thought we didn't have fighting spirit or some stupid bullshit, and thought that when our pre-war war plan went out the window when they bombed pearl we'd just back the fuck down.

They knew they'd never be able to outproduce us, that's why they fucking shot for their stupid ass 'qualitative superiority' even though they weren't qualitatively superior at fucking all because their philosophy was so fucked up it was more hilarious than sad.

Keep in mind these are the stupid dipshits that wouldn't launch one multirole bomber as a scout when a scout plane went down and got fucking demolished for it. Think about that shit.

>>39698893
well said.

>>39698926
luck

>>39698861

They knew, and they didn't care.

Source: LETTERS FROM IWO JIMA, THE FUCKING BOOK. GUESS WHO MADE IWO JIMA A FUCKING DEATH ISLAND? THE SAME FUCKING GUY WHO SAID "DON'T FUCK WITH AMERICA".

YES, AN IJN GENERAL WENT TO AMERICA IN THE INTERWAR YEARS AND REALIZED HOW FUCKED JAPAN WAS IF THEY FUCKING STIRRED UP THAT HORNET'S NEST. AND GUESS HOW HIS SUPERIORS TREATED HIM. LIKE SHIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIT.

>>39698926
Pure luck I guess. Still, a 16 incher to the rudder would mean the Washington Gunners rolled a nat 20 in a high roll.

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>>39698913
shit

its

shit

>>39698938
>wouldn't launch one multirole bomber as a scout when a scout plane went down

What.

How the FUCK did these people manage to get so much of China?

Urakaze as Kongou's henchgirl when planefag?

>>39698964
Yamamoto. Admiral not General.

>>39698977
China was basically fighting with sticks and magic at the time.

>>39698875
She would likely think we were already unfaithful, look at it from her perspective.

She's standing there, waiting to escort the admiral to his next meeting like the good shipgirl she is so that here dear sweet admiral doesn't have to bother himself with those other whores. Then all of a sudden the Admiral walks out with a girl in each arm. What is she going to do to make sure that no-one can stop her from being the ONLY ship girl we need.

THINK ABOUT IT!

>>39698998
I now want a game with yandere ship sluts.

Or a game where I am in charge of a single capital ship.

>>39698631
Their optical FCS were pretty dman good. Radar-wise, it's easy to say that with hindsight, but back then? Amongst pretty much all the navies in the conflict, opinions amongst the various experts and ship designers on it ranged all the way from "useless gimmick" to "this shit will win the war by itself". Nobody had any real idea how it would actually work out.

>>39698970
as are you wwwwwww

>>39698938
Hell we didnt even throw any of War Plan Orange out the window, its just that the "build up logistics train and ALL THE SUPPLIES for 8-12 months before buttfucking the japs" section had "oh and raise and repair those ships we lost" penciled in.

>>39698964
>an
>implying just one
Quite a few Japanese military men studied in the US.
>>39698977
The Japs loved their doctrine, and in their doctrine carriers didn't do scouting. That's what Jap CAs were for...it's why they had so many floatplanes. They were the eyes of the fleet, not any scouting element on the CVs because
>REDUCING GRORIOUS FIRST STRIKE POTENTIAL IS DISHONORABRRRR
Japanese martial thinking has a noticeable trend towards short, devastating first strikes without any thought of what happened afterwards on both a macro and micro level. Worked for them in the Russo-Japanese war, and they hoped that it'd work in WW2. It didn't

>>39699015
Why not go out on WoWs in Yandere!Hood?

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As you jounce and bounce around in the steel bands that someone apparently uses as arms, you find yourself unable to muster much in the way of fucks to give. Yokosuka was locked down tight when the War On Terror started, locked down tighter when war with China seemed likely, and locked down AGAIN when the Abyssal War began – as the essential facility in the Pacific for *two* separate allied navies, there is probably no place on earth with a greater concentration of bored Marines kicking rocks around during perimeter patrol. Whoever, or whatever is currently booking it across the green lawns with you in their arms will find themselves buried under a sweaty, smelly pile of happy-go-killy infantry in less time than it takes to talk about it.

So you wait. Within half a mile, your captor seems to tire, and soon they're sinking to their knees behind some tasteful landscaping bushes near the side of some administrative building. They set you against the wall, and it gives you enough time to see -

“Arizona!?”

She nods, and pats you on the head reassuringly before peeking over the bushes, as if checking for pursuit.

“Arizona, what the hell...?”

She presses a finger to your lips and ducks her head.

“You... oh. You saw the door had been kicked in-”

She nods.

“-and charged in to rescue me-”

She nods.

“-and clubbed Kongou and Kirishima in the face with my end table.”

She nods.

“Arizona...”

>You... know they were just there to pick me up, right? Kongou even made us breakfast.
>... good job, kiddo. Can't fault you there.
>Other?

>>39699039
>Japanese martial thinking has a noticeable trend towards short, devastating first strikes without any thought of what happened afterwards on both a macro and micro level.
Interestingly enough, also how their professional fencers do things.

>>39698891
Good thing their ships weren't better, their men weren't better, the Yamato spent the entire war in Japan, and the "filthy gaijin" would prove more willing to wage a complete and total war than Japan, with their almost blatant worship of death, was.

Otherwise we'd still be stuck with a shitty colonial empire in the twenty-first century and having to stomach a wholesale slaughter of the Chinese, Flips, and Koreans.

>>39698992
And fighting a civil war the entire time they resisted Japan.

The thing about WW2 Japan is, it's assumption that America didn't have 'fighting spirit' was technically correct, our ability to wage war depends entirely on the will of our civilian populace (see Vietnam, Korea).

What they forgot to calculate was that those civilians are, by in large, a bunch of fucking rowdy rednecks, so when they sneak attacked us and made it personal, they did the worst thing they could possibly do - gave the average american and stake in the war. At that point, we couldn't NOT go to war because we were handing our beer to Canada and picking up the chair already.

>>39698938
>Keep in mind these are the stupid dipshits that wouldn't launch one multirole bomber as a scout when a scout plane went down and got fucking demolished for it. Think about that shit.

Why do you want to compromise your striking power? It's not like the Americans have the courage to fight us anyway. We need to lure them out!

>>39699056
>... good job, kiddo. Can't fault you there.
Arizona is now a Fast BB

>>39699056
>... good job, kiddo. Can't fault you there.

>>39698983
Unless Isoroku Yamamoto went to America, which I highly doubt...

I do remember that he said "I can give you 6 months", though.

>>39698977
Nah. China was in the middle of a civil war and that shit was fucked up. Chiang Kai-Shek was a terrible ally to have and it infuriated the commanders there to no end.

Didn't help that the General in charge of the CBI Theater was one hell of a cunt. Oh, and Mountbatten. Always blame Mountbatten and MacArthur.

>>39699056
>>You... know they were just there to pick me up, right? Kongou even made us breakfast.
"I'm not mad, but this may take some explaining."

>>39699056
>... good job, kiddo. Can't fault you there.
Foster goodwill between allies? Fuck that.

>>39699056
>You... know they were just there to pick me up, right? Kongou even made us breakfast.
Then after she gets that...
>... good job, kiddo. Can't fault you there.

>>39699019
I am curious, what was the thought on sonar back then? Similar?

>>39699056
>... good job, kiddo. Can't fault you there.
BBs are great.

>>39699056
>>... good job, kiddo. Can't fault you there.
Normally I'd vote for be a good admiral, but considering our initial reaction to Kongou entering unannounced...

>>39699056
>>... good job, kiddo. Can't fault you there.

>>39699056
Headpat
>... good job, kiddo. Can't fault you there.
though
>... good job, kiddo. Can't fault you there.

>>39699056
>... good job, kiddo. Can't fault you there.
Classic case of mistaken identity, no problems there.
>>39699015
There is a yandere simulator out, but I don't know jack shit about it. Other than that there are those VNs that the 'nips are into these days, maybe they have what you're looking for?

>>39699056
>... good job, kiddo. Can't fault you there.
H-headpat?

>>39699056
>You... know they were just there to pick me up, right? Kongou even made us breakfast.
Oh this is too cute!

>>39699056
>>You... know they were just there to pick me up, right? Kongou even made us breakfast.
>>... good job, kiddo. Can't fault you there. You showed good instincts.

In short like >>39699092

>>39699107
What about Kirishima?

>>39699050
Wait, what?

>>39699069

THIS

>>39699102
I think once the U-boats started, people quickly approved of SONAR

>>39699056
>>You... know they were just there to pick me up, right? Kongou even made us breakfast.
>>... good job, kiddo. Can't fault you there.