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>Archive links:
http://archive.4plebs.org/tg/search/subject/Hyperdimension%20Dwarf%20Fortress%20Quest/type/op/order/asc/
http://suptg.thisisnotatrueending.com/archive.html?tags=Hyperdimension%20Dwarf%20Fortress%20Quest
Twitter: http://twitter.com/BlorpQuest

You are Urist Twelfthbay, the moe personification of Dwarf Fortress, and a short, sturdy creature fond of drink and industry. You're a dwarf, but at the same time, you're a beardless little girl because that's how the Gamindustri-verse likes its moe personifications (and you've long since established that the universe is batshit insane).

But you're not technically inside the universe anymore, are you? No, you're /outside/ the universe, in between dimensions. And that happened because, to no one's surprise, Leanbox's gigantic elaborate archeotech contraption fucked up and shunted you and a whole lot of other adventurers out of realspace, rather than just banishing the dark goddess Arfoire.

You're guessing some asshole forgot to carry the one. More likely, and in an analogy much closer to home, some asshole pulled the wrong lever entirely.

You can't really blame them, though; as a dwarf, you know full well that pulling forgotten levers is the fastest path to turning a fortress into a lake (whether it's of water, lava, or seething hordes of goblins), but there's something about Things You Shouldn't Pull that acts as an irresistible siren's call. In Gamindustri, you've spent your entire misbegotten life being told not to pull levers and press switches. Very important people have impressed upon you that you are, under no circumstances, ever to Touch The Thing, no matter how tempting the Thing or the Touching.

And right here, right now, in your fortress-slash-bastion-of-sanity, an authoritative disembodied voice claiming to be the all-knowing adviser of Gamindustri's goddesses, wants you to Touch The Thing.

(Cont.)
>>
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>>43322739
>Anyway, as I was saying before I was so rudely interrupted-

You regret nothing, and you certainly don't regret trying to shoot the hell out of floating key fragment rocks that only promise to bring you nothing but trouble.

>- please touch the Sharicite, Urist.

The Sharicite. The gigantic floating lode of goddess-powering ore that's floating smack-dab in the middle of your entrance hall (which is the really the ONLY room in your fort, but shhh). And Histoire wants you to touch the damn thing.

Why YOU? Why not Mojang, or something?, you growl, ignoring your surrogate little sister's surprised glance. If this thing's gonna be some sort of power boost, won't it make sense to pump up the stronger of you two?

>It's your fortress, is it not? Look, there's not a lot of time left; I'm running out of energy, and there's far too much left for me to explain. (゚Д゚;)

There's far too much stuff here that's pinging your paranoia, that's for sure.

>CHOOSE ONE OF THE FOLLOWING:
[ ] [TOUCH THE THING] Might as well humor Histoire, or at least get her to shut up. You know by first-hand experience that just touching Sharicite has no ill effects.
[ ] [CLARIFICATION] You've talked to Histoire before- or, well, you've DREAMT about talking to Histoire before, so why doesn't she recognize you?
[ ] [WAITASEC] How do you even know that you're talking to Histoire? Maybe it's an impostor. Or maybe this is some sorta shared hallucination. Either way, proof or bust.
[ ] [WRITE-IN]
>>
[X] [TOUCH THE THING] Might as well humor Histoire, or at least get her to shut up. You know by first-hand experience that just touching Sharicite has no ill effects.

Time for some FUN!
>>
>>43322766
>[ ] [WAITASEC] How do you even know that you're talking to Histoire? Maybe it's an impostor. Or maybe this is some sorta shared hallucination. Either way, proof or bust.

What is your job anyways?
>>
>>43322766
[X] [TOUCH THE THING] Might as well humor Histoire, or at least get her to shut up. You know by first-hand experience that just touching Sharicite has no ill effects.
>>
>>43322766
>[ ] [TOUCH THE THING] Might as well humor Histoire, or at least get her to shut up. You know by first-hand experience that just touching Sharicite has no ill effects.
Too tempting to pass up.

I hope this doesn't just save us though, there's Shovel and everyone else to save.
>>
>>43322766
>[x] [WAITASEC] How do you even know that you're talking to Histoire? Maybe it's an impostor. Or maybe this is some sorta shared hallucination. Either way, proof or bust.
>>
>>43322766
>[ ] [WAITASEC] How do you even know that you're talking to Histoire? Maybe it's an impostor. Or maybe this is some sorta shared hallucination. Either way, proof or bust.
Just because she hasn't in the past doesn't mean Arfoire can't impersonate Histoire.
>>
>>43322766
>[ ] [TOUCH THE THING] Might as well humor Histoire, or at least get her to shut up. You know by first-hand experience that just touching Sharicite has no ill effects.
>>
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hey i have extremely appropriate pixels

is your receive direct messages thing on twitter ticked?

>>43322766
[ ] [TOUCH THE THING]
>>
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>>43322976
That pic is amazing
>>
>>43322766
>[ ] [WAITASEC] How do you even know that you're talking to Histoire? Maybe it's an impostor. Or maybe this is some sorta shared hallucination. Either way, proof or bust.
>>
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Right, looks like everyone wants to TOUCH THE THING, so- writing!

>>43322976
oh god that's /beautiful/. Thank you, based drawanon...!

I have no idea how I even dredged through Twitter's settings pages to even turn the damn thing off, but IT IS BACK ON NOW
>>
Considering Planeptune's lack of shares right now, I think we should be suspicious of this possible Not-an-Histy
.
>>
>>43322766
>[ ] [TOUCH THE THING] Might as well humor Histoire, or at least get her to shut up. You know by first-hand experience that just touching Sharicite has no ill effects.

I mean what could pos...

>>43322976
...yes
>>
>>43322976
Welp

Gotta listen to the pixels.
>>
>>43322766
[X] [TOUCH THE THING] Might as well humor Histoire, or at least get her to shut up. You know by first-hand experience that just touching Sharicite has no ill effects.
>>
>>43323112
In this universe, Histoire isn't the oracle of Planeptune. Her role is more in line with the first game, I think.
>>
>[X] [TOUCH THE THING] Might as well humor Histoire, or at least get her to shut up. You know by first-hand experience that just touching Sharicite has no ill effects.
>>
>>43323176
Ah forgive me, I literally am coming into this for the first time, and have been canvassing the Total War debacle so I feel pretty bad for Nep/Plut.
>>
>>43322976
>>43322766
>[X] [TOUCH THE THING]
>[X] [WRITE-IN] wear it as a hat if possible
>>
what happened to blorp?
>>
>>43323600
Kill.
>>
>>43323600
Vanished to Gamindustri
>>
>>43322766
>[X] [TOUCH THE THING]

Sensing your hesitation (probably because she isn't blind and can see the sweat beading on your brow), Mojang steps in. "Um! I don't mean any disrespect or anything, but how can we be sure that you're really Histoire?" she asks, perfectly reasonably. "If you are, you shouldn't be here right now! And you- or parts of you- certainly shouldn't be inside big sis Urist's backpack. So maybe Oneechan shouldn't do the thing before-"

>Oh, she just did the thing.

Mojang whirls around, shocked. You stare back with a distinctly deer-in-headlights-esque expression, one palm pressed against the Sharicite's smooth, cool, and all-too-tempting surface. "Oneechan, no!" the redhead moans.

ONEECHAN, YES.

Before either of you can say anything else, the gentle light pulsing from the Sharicite seems to /explode/ outward, nearly blinding you and Mojang. You can't seem to take your hand off the damn thing, and whatever's causing it to stick there also courses straight up your arm like some goddess-forsaken mix of water and liquid electricity. It's not /painful/, per se, but it sure as hell isn't /pleasant/, and the one thought that stands out in your mind is that your epitaph will be so fucking stupid: "caved into the peer pressure from all of one person, exploded into bits."

Just as you think that, the effect fades, and the Sharicite goes back to being some big gob of goddess-powering stone that just so happens to be floating. It's shining a little brighter, though, and that's completely the last thing on your mind because what the goddamned hell was that?

You hear a small sigh of relief from Histoire.

Fucking- she didn't know if that was going to work!?

>I was not /one hundred/ percent sure, but I had very good reason to believe that would!

(Cont.)
>>
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>>43323868
Thankfully, Mojang speaks up again. And she's got your crossbow, so you can't just break Histoire. "Okay. Um." she's got a hand over her chest, like she's making sure her heart hasn't imploded from the shock or anything. "Please explain?"

>You must have noticed unreality's effect, right? How the edges of your territory have already begun succumbing, losing gravitational coherency and twisting into strange shapes?

You briefly recall charging back into your fortress at top speed, wailing and sobbing in indescribable embarrassment and completely not noticing anything peculiar about your fortress's territory. So of course you nod sagely.

>Sharicite has the ability to fend off the debilitating effects of the hyperdimension, which is quite important since no one from Gamindustri comes equipped to survive out here. Think of the Sharicite as creating a bubble of reality around your fortress- although this only works if it's properly attuned.

So... she bet the farm on the fact that this Sharicite could miraculously attune itself to your fortress?

>Well, it IS all quite theoretical! No one really comes out here, after all.

You snort. Until CPU Green Heart's failsafe done fucked up.

"Does this make us, like, astronauts...?" Mojang asks, looking as if she's not sure she ought to be excited by this fact.

>In a sense- but we're getting off-topic! Before you ask, I appear to have been locked up somewhere in Gamindustri, I can occasionally communicate to you through these Key Fragments, and proximity to an active node of Sharicite was enough to wake me up, although I will only be able to talk to you intermittently as I lack the power for sustained operations.

Histoire pauses to take an audible breath. Damn. She, uh, practice this sort of speech a lot?

You hear her sigh again, and her tone of voice is noticeably more clipped when she responds-

(Cont.)
>>
>>43323900
>This is not the first time something like this happened to me. (`-_>-) I AM quite invested in your ability to survive and return to free me; as such, I should have the time to answer one question before growing inactive once more.

Well then-

>But I have to warn you, depending on the question, it may take a little while for me to come up with a response. I may have to get back to you, so please be patient and wait until I wake up again.

You bite back a scathing retort and get to thinkin'.

>CHOOSE ONE OF THE FOLLOWING:
[ ] [HYPERDIMENSION] Ask Histoire about the most pressing concern you'll be facing out here (i.e. monsters from the great beyond, etc).
[ ] [RETURN TICKET] Ask Histoire the quickest way for you to get back to Gamindustri, preferably in one piece or in enough pieces to survive.
[ ] [DEJA VU] Ask about how you appear to have "met" Histoire before. Sure, dreams are dreams and all, but that one was... strange.
[ ] [ARFOIRE] Ask Histoire what the hell she thinks Arfoire is up to, outside of the usual "let's take over the world" shit.
[ ] [WHY THIS] Ask Histoire why you and Mojang and Shovel Knight even got shunted out here in the first place. Because that's been on your mind.
>>
[X] [DEJA VU] Ask about how you appear to have "met" Histoire before. Sure, dreams are dreams and all, but that one was... strange.
>>
>>43323922
>[ ] [WHY THIS] Ask Histoire why you and Mojang and Shovel Knight even got shunted out here in the first place. Because that's been on your mind.
>>
>>43323922
[ ] [RETURN TICKET] Ask Histoire the quickest way for you to get back to Gamindustri, preferably in one piece or in enough pieces to survive.

Doesn't matter what Arfoire is up to this time. We need to get home, and fast.
>>
>>43323922
>[ ] [RETURN TICKET] Ask Histoire the quickest way for you to get back to Gamindustri, preferably in one piece or in enough pieces to survive.
>>
>>43323922
>[X] [DEJA VU] Ask about how you appear to have "met" Histoire before. Sure, dreams are dreams and all, but that one was... strange.
>>
>>43323922
[X][WRITE-IN] Is there any quick and easy way to detect other adventurers shunted out to the Hyperdimension and maybe, track them down, bring them back here, and save them from being reality-warped?
>>
>>43323922
>[ ] [RETURN TICKET] Ask Histoire the quickest way for you to get back to Gamindustri, preferably in one piece or in enough pieces to survive.

Wonder if this sharicite can be brought back.
>>
>>43323922
>[ ] [RETURN TICKET] Ask Histoire the quickest way for you to get back to Gamindustri, preferably in one piece or in enough pieces to survive.
After we form THE BEST PARTY I mean.
>>
>>43324049
I see what you did there.
>>
>>43323922
>[x] [WHY THIS] Ask Histoire why you and Mojang and Shovel Knight even got shunted out here in the first place. Because that's been on your mind.
>>
[X] [DEJA TICKET] Ask about how you appear to have "met" Histoire before. Sure, dreams are dreams and all, but that one was... strange.
exposition never hurts, but keep it short
>>
>>43323922
>[x] [RETURN TICKET] Ask Histoire the quickest way for you to get back to Gamindustri, preferably in one piece or in enough pieces to survive.
>>
>>43323922
>[X] [RETURN TICKET] Ask Histoire the quickest way for you to get back to Gamindustri, preferably in one piece or in enough pieces to survive.
>>
>>43324061
I don't, what did he say?
>>
>>43323922
>[ ] [RETURN TICKET] Ask Histoire the quickest way for you to get back to Gamindustri, preferably in one piece or in enough pieces to survive.
>>43323302
What's this about total war? More preordered shenanigans?
>>
Wait, wait, wait. Did we just create a Hyperdimention-capable mobile assault bunker?
>>
>>43324182
"The Best Party" is in the lyrics of the Neptune Anime OP, Dimension Tripper.
>>
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Meeting with Ultradimension Neptune when?
>>
>>43324297
Mobile?
>>
>>43324026
Seconded
>>
>>43324198
in TW:Warhammer CHAOS has been announced as Preorder bonuses and they haven't bothered to confirm it was available for DLC afterwards. Either way it's 6 months before the game is released and not only have they published the Chaos army list for that game, but they're also putting them behind a pay wall, and we know more about them then the actual factions in the game. It's quite a shitstorm.
>>
>>43323922
>[X] [RETURN TICKET]

Well, it sure as hell doesn't take you and Mojang very long to agree on a question. While dicking around the hyperdimension and figuring out how to survive out here is a great short-term goal, you both have a vested interest in making sure this stay isn't /permanent/.

"What's the quickest way to return back to Gamindustri?" the Minecrafter asks, a grim set to her features.

In one fucking piece, you hasten to add. Sure, Histoire's no genie hellbent on faffing around with the literal meaning of your wish, but you're damn well set on being as clear as possible on this.

There's a moment of silence from the twin floating rocks, just long enough that you start worrying that Histoire's shut off without telling you. And then-

>It should take me approximately three days, running at full capacity, to calculate the complete answer to your question.

Seriously!? Isn't there anything she can do to speed it up?

>I'm sorry, Urist. m(_ _)m Between being split between multiple locations and communicating across dimensions, I'm running very low on processing power- it's a miracle we can even communicate at all. Under normal circumstances, it would only take me three hours, but as it is...

Right. It's not like you can skip over to wherever there are OTHER Key Fragments and piece Histoire together again.

"What if we asked you something else?" Mojang turns to you, wringing her hands a little.. "SHOULD we ask her something else?"

>That's certainly possible, but... if you don't ask this now, barring any other outside occurrences, I don't know if I'll have the energy to return to this question in a reasonable time frame. Would that be alright?

>CHOOSE ONE OF THE FOLLOWING:
[ ] [RUN THIS QUESTION] Have Histoire focus solely on coming up with this answer. This IS your highest priority right now.
[ ] [ASK ANOTHER: DEJA VU]
[ ] [ASK ANOTHER: WHY THIS]
[ ] [ASK ANOTHER: DETECTION OF OTHER ADVENTURERS]
>>
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>>43324456
>[X] [ASK ANOTHER: DETECTION OF OTHER ADVENTURERS]

Yes please.
>>
>>43324456
>[ ] [ASK ANOTHER: DETECTION OF OTHER ADVENTURERS]

Where the hell is Shovel Knight?
>>
>>43324456
>[ ] [ASK ANOTHER: DETECTION OF OTHER ADVENTURERS]

We are in SPACE! Mojang thinks they are Astronauts!

This means you need to get a SPECIALIST!

We need Kerbal Space Program!
>>
>>43324456
>[ ] [RUN THIS QUESTION] Have Histoire focus solely on coming up with this answer. This IS your highest priority right now.
We and Mojang our survivors. We can hold for three days.

Probably. Might still be on the look out for possible escape anyway l.
>>
[X] [RUN THIS QUESTION] Have Histoire focus solely on coming up with this answer. This IS your highest priority right now.
>>
[X] [RUN THIS QUESTION] Have Histoire focus solely on coming up with this answer. This IS your highest priority right now.

can't we just look for shovel knight by periodically scanning with therapist
>>
>>43324456
>[X] [ASK ANOTHER: DETECTION OF OTHER ADVENTURERS]
>>
>>43324456
>[ ] [ASK ANOTHER: WHY THIS]
I think she should know this on hand
>>
>>43324456
>[ ] [ASK ANOTHER: DETECTION OF OTHER ADVENTURERS]
Can't leave our fellow innocent bystanders hangin in the wind
>>
>Implying Histy can get that much information in less then three days.
>>
>>43324456
>[X] [ASK ANOTHER: DETECTION OF OTHER ADVENTURERS]

We are a NOBLE HERO who will make sure that our friends are SAFE. Events in the past that would seem to indicate otherwise are PURE COINCIDENCE.
>>
>>43324456
>[ ] [ASK ANOTHER: DETECTION OF OTHER ADVENTURERS]
>>
>>43323900
>astronauts
What's beyond the stars of Gamindustri? Other continents? worlds? Goddesses? Little Sisters? Little Brothers?

>>43323922
>Ask about how you appear to have "met" Histoire before. Sure, dreams are dreams and all, but that one was... strange.
DREAM HISTOIRE IS ARFOIRE, SHE LED US HERE
>>
>>43324667
She can generally do anything in the three [time unit].
>>
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>>43324722
>What's beyond the stars of Gamindustri?
Other dimensions, like Plutia's and Big Nep's. Beyond them lie the lands of the Master Race, which look like this but with cute girls instead of these dudes.
>>
>>43324731
Right but scanning uncharted territory with processing power less then Mini-histy will definitely take at lease 3 days. More like 3 weeks.
>>
>>43324456
>[ ] [RUN THIS QUESTION] Have Histoire focus solely on coming up with this answer. This IS your highest priority right now
>>
>>43324922
We'd be lucky of it doesn't end up taking three years.
>>
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>>43324456
>[X] [ASK ANOTHER: DETECTION OF OTHER ADVENTURERS]

You'd... you'd better ask her something else.

Mojang tilts her head at you. You... you THOUGHT that was a thing that only Estelle and Rokko did. Maybe it's contagious. "Do you really think so, Oneechan?"

You nod, taking a moment to flick an errant braid back over your shoulder. Sure. In a place like this, three days is a damnably long time, and it'd be better if you got some info to keep you guys alive. And out here, the surest way to stay alive? Get more people.

Mojang plops the bottom of her fist into her open hand- it takes you a moment to remember that that gesture means "oh, I see!" in the weeaboo language of Gamindustri. "Right! If we were zapped all the way out here, then there could be other adventurers out here, too! So if that's the case-"

Histoire, is there any way to detect other adventurers who could be trapped out here, too?

A few minutes pass- if you were counting, it'd probably be three minutes. With a yawn, Histoire's voice comes back on, her normally clipped tones sounding just a bit drowsy.

>Not likely. It would be a different story if one of you had looking-for-group capabilities, like the Warcrafter. Even telepathic abilities would be helpful, but...

Well, shit. You've got /Therapist/, but that only pings for people you're already friendly with.

>Hmm? Mm... can you please let me see it? C'mere and touch me. My rocks, I mean. I can upgrade it.

Wow. She must REALLY be out of it if she's talking like this. Shrugging at Mojang (who's wringing her hands an awful lot, for reasons you don't want to consider), you trot over to Histoire's Key Fragments and place your hands on them. Three seconds later, a switch flips in your head, and Histoire's Key Fragments drift away from you, floating perilously close to the ground. She's running on fumes.

(Cont.)
>>
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>>43325208
>Done. Added a tab for adventurers, even if you don't know 'em. As long as they aren't truly messed up beyond belief, you'll be able to sense 'em...

You flip Dwarf Therapist on; true to her word, there's a tab sitting there, as prettily and naturally as something that was part of your code in the first place, rather than some off-the-cuff hack job that you'd expected this to be.

She can DO that!?

>'Course I can. 'm an Oracle. Or... guess I'm THE Oracle, here. Or is it the Tome? Well, whatever. Please keep it a secret, though.

Histoire's voice grows fainter, even as she keeps mumbling sleepily to herself, sounding more like the child she probably looks like than the divine being she actually is.

>I help usher adventurers into Gamindustri. I'm the, what do you call it, the usherer. Aggregated belief from across the void, all yearning to exist as moe personifications... 'course I can patch fixes here and there.

There's a quiet, contemplative edge to her quietly murmuring voice, now. It's the kind of tone that you've heard all too many times in bars, mostly from those slumped down over their table or the counter, sad drunks too deep into their cups to care.

>But I was coded to do so only in dimension-shattering emergencies, and only rarely. You're the first, Urist. The first I've ever been allowed to fix. There were so many adventurers I could have helped, girls who were broken and yearning and ailing. I knew them all. Watched 'em struggle to overcome their glitches. Many didn't. I could've helped them. I should've been able to. Why was I coded like this? Why...

(Cont.)
>>
>>43325208
>looking-for-group capabilities
I don't suppose LAN/internet searching for minecraft servers count?
>>
>>43325245
With that last whisper, the Key Fragments settle against the ground, inert as any other rock. You and Mojang watch it for a few more moments; when Histoire doesn't wake up again, you quietly return them to your backpack.

There's... there's really not a lot you can say to that.

>CHOOSE ONE OF THE FOLLOWING:
[ ] [EXPLORATION PINGING] Well, time's a-wasting: take a lap around Hyperdimension (the fortress, not the cosmos) and see if you can't locate any other adventurers in the area.
[ ] [FORTIFICATION] This is your one bastion against insanity and unreality. You and Mojang had best do what you can to make it more defensible, right?
[ ] [GATHERING] Your most pressing needs are food, booze, and water in case you or Mojang are injured. You desperately need supplies; go out there and make your own.
[ ] [WRITE-IN]
>>
>>43325271
>[ ] [EXPLORATION PINGING] Well, time's a-wasting: take a lap around Hyperdimension (the fortress, not the cosmos) and see if you can't locate any other adventurers in the area.
Crying under a bed counts as rest.
>>
>>43325271
>[ ] [EXPLORATION PINGING] Well, time's a-wasting: take a lap around Hyperdimension (the fortress, not the cosmos) and see if you can't locate any other adventurers in the area.
>>
>>43325271
>[X] [EXPLORATION PINGING] Well, time's a-wasting: take a lap around Hyperdimension (the fortress, not the cosmos) and see if you can't locate any other adventurers in the area.
>>
>>43325271
>[X] [EXPLORATION PINGING] Well, time's a-wasting: take a lap around Hyperdimension (the fortress, not the cosmos) and see if you can't locate any other adventurers in the area.
>>
>>43325271
>[X] [WRITE-IN]

Urist goes exploring while Mojang starts gathering food and water.
>>
>>43325271
>[ ] [EXPLORATION PINGING] Well, time's a-wasting: take a lap around Hyperdimension (the fortress, not the cosmos) and see if you can't locate any other adventurers in the area.
Hopefully a pal is around instead of some jerk.
>>
>>43325271
>[X] [EXPLORATION PINGING] Well, time's a-wasting: take a lap around Hyperdimension (the fortress, not the cosmos) and see if you can't locate any other adventurers in the area.
Time's a-wastin', and little sisters don't gather themselves.

Uhm, I mean, allies. Yeah. Allies who you'll put to work helping out the good of the Fortress.

Not that other thing we didn't say.
>>
If we can hopefully find adventurers, we can use help to defend the fort and gather shit.

Too bad Dwarf Fortress and Minecraft do not have the goodies that civ has. Bet she is out here too, but loaded for bear.
>>
>>43325323
DONT SPLIT THE PARTY
>>
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>>43325348
Come on, what could go wrong?
>>
>>43325271
>[ ] [GATHERING] Your most pressing needs are food, booze, and water in case you or Mojang are injured. You desperately need supplies; go out there and make your own.

Poor histy
>>
>>43325400
>Welcome back Urist! Aren't you injured? Here, come on in!
>I thought you always called me Senpai or Onee-chan?
>Yes, she always did, and she never will again.
>>
>>43325271
>[ ] [EXPLORATION PINGING] Well, time's a-wasting: take a lap around Hyperdimension (the fortress, not the cosmos) and see if you can't locate any other adventurers in the area.
>>
>[X] [GATHERING] Your most pressing needs are food, booze, and water in case you or Mojang are injured. You desperately need supplies; go out there and make your own.
>>
>>43325271
>[X] [EXPLORATION PINGING] Well, time's a-wasting: take a lap around Hyperdimension (the fortress, not the cosmos) and see if you can't locate any other adventurers in the area.
>>
>>43325271
>[X] [EXPLORATION PINGING] Well, time's a-wasting: take a lap around Hyperdimension (the fortress, not the cosmos) and see if you can't locate any other adventurers in the area.

Pointless to gather provisions if you're going to need to do it again to accommodate more people.
>>
>>43325271
>>43325271
>[ ] [EXPLORATION PINGING] Well, time's a-wasting: take a lap around Hyperdimension (the fortress, not the cosmos) and see if you can't locate any other adventurers in the area.
WHILE DOING
>[ ] [SURVEY] Survey Hyperdimension for mineral resources, ore veins, flux or valuable layer stones, signs of volcanism, or other significant Dwarf land features. Bring MOJANG along too, for additional geological expertise.
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>>43325271
>[X] [EXPLORATION PINGING]

Well, shit, the more the merrier, right? You're pretty sure your summoning abilities are still all sorts of fucked up right now (and although that hand-holding mojo you'd done with Mojang technically /worked/, look how that turned out), so in lieu of your own dwarves, you're probably better off saving some other poor bastards and shanghaiing them into your fortress. At the very least, you need someone who can stay at home and operate the drawbridge while you (or some other people) go exploring.

So you and Mojang, quiet and contemplative, start walking the perimeter of Endinomon. The Enchanted Realm is, 'course, the landmass containing your fortress and your very first realm that you'd created out on the outskirts of Leanbox. You're already feeling nostalgic for the days when you WEREN'T worrying about shit like another Console War or Red Rings of Death or Arfoire murdering goddamn everybody.

Your palms itch. You could really go for another drink right now, but as much as you hate to say it, you... you're out of booze.

Pushing that from your mind, you focus on the task at hand, climbing up a miniature mountain range (possible metal ores?) before flipping on Therapist. Behind you, Mojang... well, she's punching grass, the force behind her knuckles ripping the shrubs out by their roots and popping them into seeds.

You muffle a sigh. You've been over this with her- the /proper/ way to gather berries and plants is to carefully take the time to disassemble those leafy sons of bitches until they're nothing but scattered bits of plant matter. Punching grass and shrubs like this will only get inferior surface-world wheat seeds-

You hold your tongue. Right. Mojang's not a kid anymore, and you need all the supplies you can gather right now, so you swap to the newfangled "Adventurers! (/・0・)" tab (how the hell does Histoire pull these emoticons out of nowhere?) and concentrate.

(Cont.)
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>>43326031
It's... it's a slightly different feeling from your usual pings. Slowly but surely, some kinda signal wave ripples outward from your position, almost like sonar. You're suddenly hyperaware of the cosmos all around you- galaxies whirling through the garishly multicolored "sky" at top speeds, stars exploding and imploding all over the place, and that constantly irregular bass thumping, like two eons-distant giants are hurling punches at each other at on some unfathomably titanic scale-

Moments later, you've got a short list of names. Disappointed at how fragmented some of the info is, you pore through them- groaning a little at some of the ones you know all too well- before hopping down and approaching Mojang. The redhead whirls on you at almost exactly the same moment, looking inordinately pleased, and you open your mouths.

You got the names-
"Oneechan, I got enough-"

After a few false starts of talking over one another, Mojang giggles, covering her mouth. "You first?"

You run down the list of adventurers you'd pinged, trying to conceal the gnawing worry at those familiar names you DON'T see right now.

>CHOOSE ONE OF THE FOLLOWING:
[ ] [DOTA / LOL] Dao and Lian, the two stooges who have been intermittent thorns in your side. They're sticking close together; one isn't moving much, though.
[ ] [TESSA] You can't get a whole lot of information about this one. She's some sort of fantasy-based adventurer; whoever she is, she's completely stationary.
[ ] [TIFF] Whoever she is, she's constantly on the move, both on the x- and y-axis. Which is to say, she's running and jumping. Other than that...
[ ] [???] This nameless blip weaves drunkenly, stopping to do... something. Even weirder, it keeps scratching in and out of your radar, like it's hopping in and out of reality.
X SHOVEL KNIGHT still missing.
X EXEY (XCOM) still missing.
X MAIA (Civilization) still missing.
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>>43326058
>[ ] [TIFF] Whoever she is, she's constantly on the move, both on the x- and y-axis. Which is to say, she's running and jumping. Other than that...
>[ ] [???] This nameless blip weaves drunkenly, stopping to do... something. Even weirder, it keeps scratching in and out of your radar, like it's hopping in and out of reality.
either of them.
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>>43326058
>[ ] [???] This nameless blip weaves drunkenly, stopping to do... something. Even weirder, it keeps scratching in and out of your radar, like it's hopping in and out of reality.
>>
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>>43326031
>>43326058
>you... you're out of booze.
[X] BOOZE - Designate a farm plot and plant Plump Helmet spawn. Create a Brewery workshop, a Carpenter's Workshop and some barrels.
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>>43326058
[X] [???] This nameless blip weaves drunkenly, stopping to do... something. Even weirder, it keeps scratching in and out of your radar, like it's hopping in and out of reality.

MYSTERY BOX!
MYSTERY BOX!
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>>43326058
>[ ] [???] This nameless blip weaves drunkenly, stopping to do... something. Even weirder, it keeps scratching in and out of your radar, like it's hopping in and out of reality.
MYSTERY BOX!
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>>43326058
>[X] [TIFF] Whoever she is, she's constantly on the move, both on the x- and y-axis. Which is to say, she's running and jumping. Other than that...
Looks like someone in trouble to me.
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>>43326058
>[ ] [???] This nameless blip weaves drunkenly, stopping to do... something. Even weirder, it keeps scratching in and out of your radar, like it's hopping in and out of reality.
>drunkenly
Booze?

I can't remember, did Dota and LoL work for Arfoire or just general punks? I don't mind going to them if one of them is hurt.
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>>43326058
>[X] [???] This nameless blip weaves drunkenly, stopping to do... something. Even weirder, it keeps scratching in and out of your radar, like it's hopping in and out of reality.
A Mystery Box?

WHAT'S IN THE BOX!?
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>>43326167
I believe both are just general annoyances for everyone. Urist in particular.
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>>43326167
They're freelancers, they don't work for the bad guys (as far as we know), but they're total shitstains.
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>>43326058
>[X] [???]
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>>43326058
>[ ] [TESSA] You can't get a whole lot of information about this one. She's some sort of fantasy-based adventurer; whoever she is, she's completely stationary.
>>
I wonder if [???] is FTL-chan?
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>>43326058
>[???]
MYSTERY BOX!!!
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>>43326235
I'm kinda disappointed Thirteen isn't on our side, if only because of all the batshit crazy and stupidly-robust stuff she can do. In terms of game character, she's the closest thing to Dorf Fort there is.
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>>43326280
at least FTL could be interesting, can't think of anyone else fitting [???]'s description
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>>43326280
Thirteen can be quite a builder, if she has a time and in autistic... I mean, engineer mode.
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Alright, it's getting pretty late, so I'll have to call it here for the night! We'll pick up next time with Urist and Mojang trying to hunt down the ever-elusive [???]

Let's try for the next thread on Friday, 10/30, again at 9-ish pm EST; scheduling updates will go to https://twitter.com/BlorpQuest, and questions can go either here or ask.fm/BlorpQuest!

Thanks for participating, guys, and g'night; hope to catch you next time! Bonus scene next time!
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>>43326356
Thanks Blorp as always, see you next time.
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>>43326310
Oh, FTL would be totally cool to have around.
>>43326326
I'd have characterized her as a Robust Assistant; Able to do pretty much everything to a passable degree, if you don't mind ramshackle construction, instantaneous improvisation, and copious amounts of duct tape. Has a penchant for practical jokes of varying harm/humor - "Honk!"
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>>43326356
is it a halloween scene with pumpkinhead mojang
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>>43326356
What would happen if we gave Neptune booze pudding?
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>>43326356
Aaaargh!
Blorp, I ask only one question - why?
See ya next time then.
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>>43326388
Nothing. It's counts as food, not drink.
But,she IS Neptune, so I guess consequences would be unpredictable.
>choose banana
It's ginger, captcha.
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>>43326356
Hey blorp if the fairy is frustrated by her inability to alter coding except in dire circumstances, can she change her OWN coding under these dire circumstances to not be restricted anymore?
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>>43326382
If it's sturdy and space-proof, then it's counts as building.
On other hand, she totally batshit crazy. In moments of clarity with surplus of materials she make a good building. Then she switch to the Cuban Pete and blow up everything forever.
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>>43326429
Shut the fuck up before they find you.
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>>43326477
Cuban Pete is smalltime, son.
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>>43326382
>FTL
... huh, I KNEW something had slipped my mind. She would be pretty cool to have around, wouldn't she?

>>43326384
>halloween scene
I... wish I could say it was this, but I'm kinda backlogged with that OTHER thing I need to be writing!

>>43326388
WHAT COULD POSSIBLY GO WRONG WITH GIVING THE PUDDING ADDICT WITH GODDESS POWERS SPIKED PUDDING

>>43326397
Because I've got a crick in my neck and I'm almost asleep!

>>43326429
She can't edit her own coding, anon- that'd pretty much remove the point of having any restrictions in the first place. And even if she could, it'd be like... tying up a computer's innards with physical rope and trying to free it by tweaking its programming.
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>>43326502
Small time or not, Cuban Pete is iconic bomber.
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>>43326529
It's okay, Blorp. We will wait.
Christmas story when?
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>>43326529
I don't quite get that analogy, but ok.
Doesn't mean we can't do it ourselves, anyway.
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>>43326529
>WHAT COULD POSSIBLY GO WRONG WITH GIVING THE PUDDING ADDICT WITH GODDESS POWERS SPIKED PUDDING
ONLY RIGHT AND HILARIOUS THINGS

Thanks for running! Sweet NepNep dreams!



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