>>50519160

Is everyone ready for the next iteration of "Will it blend"?

>>50519158
I'm putting my money on Butt Naked.

Cat-o-Eighteen Let's go!

>>50519172
We should actually get 2 so we have a backup when the first one goes boom.

>>50519193

At least if one blows up he has a spare!

This same principle applies to his LP.

When we last left our group of incompetent heroes, we were finishing character creation on our last participant, Stumpy the Dwarf, Champion of Urist, Blessed by Tons of Fucking Gear.

As I go calculate his final stats, you guys can look at which magical items we should use:
Leather Armour of Agility (+1 Agility)
Chainmail of Life (+50 LP)
Shield of Courage (50% resistance to fear)
Studded Leather of Invisibility (1 invisibility spell)
Robes of Protection (+5 defence)
Steel Gauntlets of Water (can breathe underwater)
Platemail of Speed (x2 speed)
Steel Helmet of Courage (50% resistance to fear)
Steel Shinguard of Flight (1 flight spell)
Steel Bracers of Protection (+5 defence)
Full Plate of Water (can breathe underwater)

As well as 1300 gold. I'll be back in a minute.

In the meantime, I need someone to roll 2d10 for me. It's Stumpy's LP.

>>50519099
>Chainmail of Life
>[Steel] Helmet of Courage
>Steel Gauntlets of Water
>Steel Bracers of Protection
>[Steel] Shinguard of Flight
>>50519160
>>50519172
Please anon I think we YES

Rolled 9, 5 = 14 (2d10)

>>50519215

>>50519215

Chainmail of Life. It's absurd.

Can he also wear the Robes of Protection, the Steel Bracers of Protection, and the Steel Helmet of Courage? If he can, I say we load the fuck up on that stuff and then grab two Cat-O-Ninetails and go to town on...the universe.

>>50519232
This is the man with the plan.

File: Items.png (191 KB, 1298x1177)

191 KB PNG

Last thread, if you want to read from the start:
>>50512930

>>50519172
>>50519200
>>50519202
>>50519223
>>50519247

I think everyone is in agreement. Two Cat-o-Nine Tails.

File: Armour.png (102 KB, 651x803)

102 KB PNG

>>50519248
>>50519226
14+8=22
22 LP for Stumpy

>>50519264
With his Cats-o-Eighteen-Tails and Chainmail of Life, he might not kill himself in the first turn!

>>50519273
Don't you mean 72 LP?

>>50519287
To be fair he might kill the whole planet, in case he trips. This is a risk I'm willing to take.

File: Weapons.png (109 KB, 627x869)

109 KB PNG

>>50519294
I'm doing base stats still.

>>50519296
Stumpy, Chosen of Urist, Flagellater of Planets

>>50519296

As the guy who named Stumpy, I petition we add the title "Dwarf Fortress," both because he is an ironclad hit-point sack dwarf, and because tripping and accidentally obliterating the entire planet sounds like the apex of Dwarf Fortressry.

File: file.png (58 KB, 1129x921)

58 KB PNG

There, done.

So, are you in agreement to drop the Longsword of Speed for MAX CATS?

>>50519264
>>50519332
Yes.

>>50519322
Stumpy the Dwarf(en) Fortress sounds good.
>>50519332
Lets start with 1 sword and 1 cat and switch to the second cat when the first one breaks?

>>50519332
I for one say aye.
The cats are aggressive.

>>50519332
CAT-O-EIGHTEEN

>>50519332
Max Cats.

Make it happen.

THE PEOPLE HAVE SPOKEN
MAX CATS
NO RETURN
NO REGRET

I'll be back as soon as I'm done calculating all the durability.

ALL HAIL THE CATS!

Please tell me the first thread will be archived

>>50519435
Thread is now archived: http://suptg.thisisnotatrueending.com/archive/50512930/

File: file.png (81 KB, 1293x919)

81 KB PNG

I hope you're please with yourself, /tg/. You created this monster.

>>50519514
I am very pleased, thank you.

>>50519514

You can't imagine how pleased I am with Stumpy the Dwarf Fortress, Chosen of Urist.

You can't possibly imagine.

>>50519514
Poor Lucy.

>>50519514
>http://suptg.thisisnotatrueending.com/archive/50512930/
You know we are pleased.

>>50519514
Now watch as he takes one step forwards and decapitates himself.

File: Battle System.png (152 KB, 1297x911)

152 KB PNG

We're now scheduled for the last fight in the first round of our tournament.
In one corner we have Luck Leadfoot, a somewhat clumsy Dwarf Champion who nevertheless tries her best. and fights with humble arms.
In the other corner we have Stumpy the Dwarf Fortress, Chosen of Urist, Living Armoury, Catmaster Supreme, who is pretty much a force of nature in shape of a Dwarf. Most spectators have evacuated the premises by now, well remembering Typhoon Breakwater's Whip Explosion.

So tell me:
ARE YOU READY TO FUMBLE?

Stumpy goes first, so I'm going to need 9d100.

Rolled 70, 18, 14, 13, 42, 29, 47, 86, 41 = 360 (9d100)

>>50519573

Rolled 97, 97, 75, 8, 30, 72, 36, 87, 32 = 534 (9d100)

>>50519573
EXPLOSION(S)!

Rolled 38, 99, 69, 7, 29, 93, 26, 71, 20 = 452 (9d100)

>>50519573
you got it, boss

File: Stump'd.png (24 KB, 1152x648)

24 KB PNG

>>50519573

I made some OC to show my support for our dwarven catlord.

It's terrible because I am a god-awful artist, but I wanted to contribute to a truly epic thread.

>>50519587
That's four hits and five misses!
Miss, Hit, Hit, Hit, Miss, Hit, Miss, Miss, Miss.

>>50519588
I'll use this as hit locations:
>Head Shot
>Head Shot
>Lower Abdomen or Forearms
>Lower Legs
>Upper Legs
>Chest or Upper Arms
>Upper Legs
>Lower Abdomen or Forearms
>Upper Legs

>>50519590
Using this to take the misses first.
>Miss 1
The whip hits something hard and takes (1d6)*5 damage.
>Miss 2
Armour hit on lower legs, but she has no armour there so it doesn't matter.
>Miss 3
We hit something hard again, weapon takes another (1d6)*2 damage!
>Miss 4
STUMPY SLIPS AND HITS HIMSELF FOR 3x1d4+2 DAMAGE!
>Miss 5
STUMPY SLIPS AND HITS HIMSELF FOR 1d4+2 DAMAGE!

I'm going to need 2d6 for damage to the whip and 2d4 for damage to Stumpy.

Rolled 6, 6 = 12 (2d6)

>>50519705

Rolled 1, 2 = 3 (2d6)

>>50519705
oh god is stumpy gonna sudoku round 1

Rolled 6, 6 = 12 (2d6)

>>50519705
>>50519705
RIP Whip

Rolled 1, 3 = 4 (2d4)

>>50519705
We believe in you, stumpy!

Rolled 3, 2 = 5 (2d4)

>>50519705

Rolled 4, 2 = 6 (2d6)

>>50519717
>>50519727
>Rolled 6, 6 = 12 (2d6)
rip Cat-o-Eighteen

>>50519741
19 self damage.
But Stumpy SURVIVES.

>>50519717
oh god the whip tornado claims another cat

4 hits now?

>>50519717
6*5+6=36
The Cat o' Nine Tails in Stumpy's right hand has 4 points of health and has just taken 36 damage. That's 9 times the limit. It's fucking atomized.

>>50519739
(1+2)*3=9
3+2=5
Stumpy slips and whips himself for 14 LP!

I need one of you to roll 5d100 for hit severity and another roll of 5d100 for Lucy's blocking.

Rolled 1, 57, 77, 95, 48 = 278 (5d100)

>>50519791

Rolled 44, 20, 83, 44, 22 = 213 (5d100)

>>50519791

Rolled 77, 77, 33, 89, 3 = 279 (5d100)

>>50519791
This is going to take a miracle for Lucy to stay un-atomized.

>>50519791
roll 5d100

File: Stump'd In Color.png (38 KB, 1152x648)

38 KB PNG

>>50519680

Posting updated OC as we wait with baited breath for Stumpy to turn Lucy into what this art looks like.

Now in color. His eyes are dead because he's in this system.

All praise the cat tails!

File: file.png (81 KB, 1299x919)

81 KB PNG

Rolled 1, 2 = 3 (2d2)

>>50519791
Severity:
Head Shot, 1/4 damage
Lower Abdomen or Forearms, 1x damage
Lower Legs, 5x damage
Chest or Upper Arms, 1x damage

>>50519821
Lucy's blocking:
Head Shot, 1x damage, 1d10 durability loss
Lower Abdomen or Forearms, 2x damage, 1d20 durability loss
Lower Legs, 1/2 damage, 1d6 durability loss
Chest or Upper Arms, 1x damage, 1d10 durability loss

I need 4d4 for damage!

Rolled 3, 4, 3, 1 = 11 (4d4)

>>50519899

Rolled 2, 1, 3, 1 = 7 (4d4)

>>50519899

Hoping I remember how to roll dice right!

Rolled 1, 2, 1, 4 = 8 (4d4)

>>50519899
>5x damage to legs
uh oh

>>50519906
>>50519908
>>50519932
RIP Lucy

>>50519975
Depending on rounding.. I think Lucy might be at 1 HP
This combat system befuddles me

>>50519994
Aren't we dual wielding?

Rolled 2, 1 = 3 (2d2)

>>50519899
So, to sum up, this is the situation:

Stumpy lashes out at Lucy, slips and fall causing him to whip him self, while other parts of the whip hit the ground so hard the whole thing disintegrates WHILE Lucy is simultaneously hit in the Head, Abdomen, Lower Legs, and Upper arms.

>>50519906
>Headshot
3+2/4=1.25=1
We've consistently rounded down, so this deals one LP of damage, dropping Lucy to 17 LP.

>Abdomen
6*2=12
She takes 12 LP loss directly to the Abdomen, reducing Lucy to 5 LP!

>Lower Legs
5*2.5=12.5=12
And another 12 LP loss in the legs, dropping her down to -7 LP.

>Upper Arms
3 LP loss, pushing Lucy down to -10 LP.

Or, it would, if there still was a Lucy to speak of. What we have here is nothing but a fine, red mist and one exploded whip.

>>50520005
This was just rolling for the first hand, there's different numbers for the other.

>>50520016
Stumpy is gonna win the tourney, calling it now

>>50520016
Can't trump the Stump!

Can Stumpy switch the Cat into his dominant hand and then use his Sword in his off-hand in the next fight?

>>50520016
So I guess Sumpy carries onwards with one Cat-o-nine and his enchanted sword (unless his cash reward will afford him another whip (plz))

Shit, I gotta go sleep. Hope I can find the archived version tomorrow.

And, just as everyone expected, the victor of the final battle in the first round was Stumpy, who in the now deserted arena proceeded to knock down both himself and the enemy, with the important distinction that Stumpy actually survived, while Lucy's remains were never completely recovered.

>>50520044
Sure.

>>50520067
I have something planned.

How much G.C. are we able to buy for with the remaining semifinalists?

File: Standings.png (86 KB, 1018x605)

86 KB PNG

Here are the standings after a completed first round.
Any comments, favourites?

We will soon go to the first Semifinal, between Typhoon Breakwater and General Butt Naked.
Who's the fan favourite?

>>50520129
In the random spirit of this game, I'm going to give each participant an unloaded roll on the GC table, which can yield everything from huge amounts to absolutely nothing.

File: Stump'd Ya.png (99 KB, 1152x648)

99 KB PNG

>>50520090

Excellent.

OC Updated to reflect the match.

>>50520164
General Butt Naked has proven to be an exceptional axeman. I'm confidnt he'll reach the final (which he will lose to Stumpy "Eighteen-o-cat" the Dwarf Fortress)

Let's start by seeing if our semifinalists get any new cash.
Can I get 2d100?

Rolled 31, 55 = 86 (2d100)

>>50520226

File: Typhoon.png (27 KB, 800x600)

27 KB PNG

>>50520164

Well Typhoon is easier to do shitty art of, I'll tell you that much.

But I gotta give it to General Butt Naked. He seems generally competent.

That art is great, anon. I had no idea what Typhoon looked like.

File: file.png (76 KB, 1325x915)

76 KB PNG

Rolled 6 (1d6)

>>50520230
1d6*100 gold for Typhoon.
1d10*100 gold for General Butt Naked.

>>50520238
10/10

Rolled 6 (1d10)

>>50520281
That's 600 gold for Typhoon Wavebreaker, the Elusive Elf.

File: file.png (146 KB, 707x647)

146 KB PNG

Rolled 9 (1d10)

>>50520292
And an identical sum for General Butt Naked, King of Glasscannons.

So, how do the to best spend 600 gold?

>>50520281
>>50520292
The money should prob'ly be spent on weapons since armor seems kinda useless..

>>50520292
Get him a Large Wooden shield and Steel Helm

>>50520309
>TOTALLY NOT A SUCCUBUS GUYS

>>50520309
General Butt Naked can get Studded Bracers & Gauntlets

File: G-Naked.png (12 KB, 772x382)

12 KB PNG

>>50520238

Have General Butt Naked's shitty fanart.

I'll stop now until the Sir Suicide shows up, unless people want me to keep going.

I'm starting to peruse the rulebook anon left in the previous thread. This is the most heinous thing I think I've ever read. Was this actually sold for actual money? I feel bad for all parties involved in that transaction.

>>50520370
Don't worry anon, your art is great while we're waiting for the countless rolls this "system" requires.

File: file.png (78 KB, 1325x917)

78 KB PNG

I do think we're ready for our first semifinal.

>>50520323
Done.

>>50520352
That's the individual price, but I aim to please.

>>50520390
Hey now, at least it's not FATAL.

File: G-Naked.png (19 KB, 772x382)

19 KB PNG

>>50520370

Updated for accuracy. I forgot his epaulets and hat. How will you know he's a general otherwise?

His hat is also a crown, because he is King of Glasscannons.

>>50520398
Okay, that's maybe a little unfair. But at least FATAL had attempts at art, coherent writing and a free CD inside.

>>50520398
Let the battle begin!

>>50520398
Alright, place your bets! I don't know the odds because there are too many numbers in the way, but I have a good feeling about General Butt Naked
>ring of silence
>ring of darkness
The audience members aren't going to be happy about this.

>>50520422
But this system has world-shattering whips, so I think they're even.

>>50520438
I'm actually finding preference for the whips. I mean, I'm aghast that it was sold in the state it's in, but I can't argue that I'm having a blast watching attempts at using it.

File: file.png (498 KB, 640x427)

498 KB PNG

The air is filled to the brim with excitement (and the remains of Lucy Leadfoot), as we enter our very first semifinal here in the great Baba-Luna tourney, AKA AtlantasiaBowl.

In one corner, he's short, he's mean, he's General Butt Naked. A monstrously strong fighter despite literally everything else about him, surrounded by a constant orb of silence. He's looted a spear, gotten a bit of armour on, and he's ready to fumble.
In the other corner, we have what we presume to be a Sea Elf called Typhoon Wavebreaker, but since he's always surrounded by a huge sphere of complete black, details are few. What we do know is that he practically invented the exploding whip attack, but has since then run out of explosives, and now carries a earthquake-summoning lance instead.

The General has the highest Dex, so he goes first.
Give me a 1d100 to see if he hits.

Rolled 98 (1d100)

>>50520481
Go general! I have 100 of whatever the local currency equivalent is riding on you!

>>50520496
>98
A spectacular miss by the Gnome nobleman!
Roll another 1d100 to see how hard he fucked up.

>whatever the local currency equivalent is
I actually had to houserule the currency system to be usable.

Rolled 11 (1d100)

>>50520514

File: G-Naked.png (21 KB, 772x382)

21 KB PNG

>>50520481

Updated for even more accuracy.

This is a battle of titans.

>>50520521
>11
In a catastrophic turn of events, the seemingly unstoppable General Butt Naked slips and accidentally impales himself upon his own spear, dealing double damage to himself!
GBN takes 8(1d8+6) LP of damage!

Someone roll a 1d8.

Rolled 8 (1d8)

>>50520545
RIP General

>>50520556
he super fucking dead

Rolled 2 (1d8)

>>50520562
He definitely fookin' dead

>>50520545
In true roman tradition, he fell upon his sword.

press f to pay respects

I'm so bad at deleting rolls >>50520568

>>50520576
f

>>50520556
>8
Oh fuck!
(8+6)*8=112

In a incomprehensible display of titanic strength and even more incompetence, General Butt Naked has somehow managed to slip and impale himself for 112 LP, which is a lot more than his max of 5.
The tiny body practically explodes due to the strength of the impact.
We assume Typhoon is as dumbfounded as everyone else, but we cannot truly know.

Could we roll for how many guns to salute in honor of the departed, clumsy General?

Self impalement seems to be a very consistent teme in this system, honestly.

>>50520594
this is 10 times more awesome than dorf fortross

>>50520594
I want my money back! This is rigged! The dang sea elf(?) just stood there!

File: Standings.png (90 KB, 1018x605)

90 KB PNG

You know, until Stumpy came around, I was sure that General Butt Naked was just going to stomp everyone. And then he just slips and drives his own spear into himself with the force of a battering ram.
A shame, he will be missed.

But, this means Typhoon is somehow in the finale, and can freely loot General Butt Naked's corpse.
Do we see anything we want?

>>50520636
C'mon suicide!

File: Deadman Walken.png (23 KB, 800x600)

23 KB PNG

>>50520636

While we wait, here's the final competitor, Sir Suicide. Note his family's crest on both his shield and leather armor. It's a very important, mysterious crest. It has deep meaning for his family.

>>50520636
His shield and a gauntlet, I guess.

>>50520636
>>50520662
and his rings.. elf needs bling

>>50520653
>file name
kek

>>50520669
Right, the rings aswell.

>>50520636
Could we take the spear, or is Sir Suicide too hilariously weak?

File: Typhoon.png (31 KB, 800x600)

31 KB PNG

>>50520662
>>50520669
>>50520680


Typhoon is updated for accuracy.

>>50520653
>>50520680
The part that scares me is that Stumpy has almost enough HP to not selbstmord.. I am more afraid of him running outta weapons

>>50520688
We want to keep the Lance, it's magic after all.

Unless... could we dual wield them..?

>>50520636
>Do we see anything we want?
...everything? Yes, everything.

File: file.png (57 KB, 811x917)

57 KB PNG

Typhoon pilfers everything useful from General Butt Naked, including:

>>50520662
>>50520669
Shield and rings. The gauntlets are equivalent.
It's worth noting that Typhoon the Alleged Elf is now an unknown being surrounded in a 15 foot wide sphere of complete darkness and silence, and does four times the damage.

>>50520688
I think the lance is better, because it has 1d10 additional earthquake damage.

>>50520703
Point.

Do we duel wield or not?

>>50520703
I want this.

>>50520711
We dual wield fo' sho'

>>50520711
Do the rules actually impose an upper limit to how many things we *can* weld?

'cause, Roronora Zolo.

>>50520711
>>50520722
>>50520713
Well, hold up though. Do we have Soulsesque stat requirements on weapons? Isn't it harder to use weapons single-handed?

>>50520799
In this system? I'm not sure at all.

>>50520799
The fights don't last long enough for dual-wielding rules to matter.. and the shield is useless since it's over in one turn anyway.
It's literally a backup weapon that he has on hand, and he'll need since he'll most likely be fighting Stumpy next

So, are you for Typhoon dual-wielding?
Typhoon is a competent enough defender to get the best block table against Stumpy without a shield.

Also, I finished preparations for the next semi.
I need 2d100 for wealth.

>>50520722
>>50520797
Yeah, only two weapons, though a shield can go in a weapon slot.

>>50520799
There's a limit on if you can use a weapon or not, but I can't find anything on something like that.
You just have accept that fact that this entire system is barely functional. There's actually not coherent rules for movement.

File: Stump2.png (34 KB, 800x600)

34 KB PNG

>>50520711

I have updated Stumpy to the new, glorious geometric art style.

All hail Urist's chosen.

Rolled 65, 14 = 79 (2d100)

>>50520847
Munny

>>50520853
I hope you have art of him as a red mist, considering his future opponent.

>>50520853
>>50520886
Oh thats the great Stumpy, my apologies.

>>50520886
Remember Stumpy has more HP than all the other competitors combined.

Rolled 10 (1d10)

>>50520862
That's 1d10x100 gold for Sir Suicide, and 0 for Stumpy.

>>50520902

Sir Suicide is >>50520653
Typhoon is >>50520700

Rolled 6 (1d10)

>>50520916

File: file.png (83 KB, 1299x895)

83 KB PNG

Last chance to make alterations before the last semifinal, and buy equipment for Sir Suicide.

>>50520937
I honestly don't think it's going to matter, Sir Suicide is fucked.

>>50520937
Golly, looking at them side-by-side really paints a portrait of gore and disappointment.
The only way Sir Suicide can win is if Stumpy commits suicide which is likely to happen

>>50520937
He's not getting a better weapon (unless he goes for a Cat-o-nine tails), so thorw everything into additional armor and hope he doesn't get literally atomized by Stumpy.

We truly created a monster in Stumpy "Cat-o-Eighteen" the Dwarf Fortress.

>>50520955
>>50520967
It might actually be more up in the air than you think.
See it like this:
Sir Suicide can buy a Cat o' Nine Tails and go to town on Stumpy, which probably won't kill him, but it might.
Stumpy can certainly kill Sir Suicide with his last Cat o' Nine Tails, but that means blowing it up, which means Stumpy will be going to the final now knowing if he rolls enough cash to buy new ones. He might risk having to fight Typhoon with the longsword.

>>50520978
Armour is actually meaningless, since the whole point of armour is to get a higher Def score than your attacker's Hit score. Which again determines which random blocking table you roll on, where one is much less dangerous than the other.

Weapons is the only option, and you know which weapon I'm talking about.

>>50521028
Go for the fucking cat-o-nine then and let's see some explosions!

>>50521028
>now knowing
*not knowing.
You get my point. The question is if you want Stumpy to use his last secure whip against Sir Suicide or save it for Typhoon?

>>50521050
In case he blows it up on the first turn he either might loot one or buy one (or two, depening on the rolls). I say go all in with the cat

File: file.png (81 KB, 1295x895)

81 KB PNG

Last call of changes.

>>50521071
That's what will happen unless we get objections.

>>50521085

All in. Praise Urist!

>>50521085
>>50521093
I believe in miracles
Sir Suicide 2020

>>50521120

Personally I expect them to blow each other up in a spectacular explosion of meat and also more meat, and Typhoon to walk away, puzzled but alive.

Only to be randomly murdered by a passing dragon sexing.

>>50521093
Betting odds are 10,000 to 1 for Sir Suicide to win.

This is the inevitable conclusion folks... but, plus side, after this, we can level up urst.

>>50521142
I got 50 saltybucks on Suicide, let's roll bois

File: file.png (31 KB, 220x196)

31 KB PNG

Everyone better settle in, because this is our first whip on whip combat.
Things might get explosive/kinky.

In the first corner, representing the last hope for humanity, Sir "Smashing Bitches in the Knees" Suicide. He has already defeated a unarmed civilian/kung fu master, so he's plenty experienced for this battle. He's the only one who has fought a combat lasting more than one turn, and for that he deserves recognition.

And in the second corner, the Catmaster, Bulwark of Urist and Mistifier of Enemies, Stumpy the Dwarf Fortress. He's blown up half of his cats, but he's eager to fight and prepared for more leathery catastrophes. He's a living brick wall compared to other fighters.

Stumpy has the highest Dex, so he goes first.

Roll 9d100 if attacking with the Cat o' Nine Tails.

Rolled 53, 23, 76, 83, 94, 4, 40, 22, 83 = 478 (9d100)

>>50521193
CANNOT TRUMP THE STUMP

>>50521193

COME ON STUMPY

>>50521205
>>50521207
I can't watch.

>>50521210

This will either be gold or horrifying.

>>50521205
>>50521210
Six misses.. that's gonna hurt.

>>50521205
>Miss
>Hit
>Miss
>Miss
>Miss
>Hit
>Miss
>Hit
>Miss
That's 6 misses and only 3 hits for Stumpy!

I need another 9d100 for hit locations, and then a 6d100 for seeing how much Stumpy fucked up this turn.

Rolled 98, 15, 36, 75, 53, 75 = 352 (6d100)

>>50521240
I hope someone gets a good roll

Rolled 64, 68, 8, 84, 38, 30, 4, 65, 83 = 444 (9d100)

>>50521240

Rolled 17, 52, 29, 73, 90, 58, 47, 40, 99 = 505 (9d100)

>>50521240
I believe in you Stumpy!

>>50521252
>>50521253
So, hit locations first:
>Chest or Upper Arms, Hit
>Upper Legs, Hit
>Chest or Upper Arms, Hit

And then, the misses:
>Miss 1
>98
Glances off SS's armour, Chest or Upper Arms, 1d4 durability damage.

>Miss 2
Stumpy slips and flogs himself for 2x damage!

>Miss 3
The whip hits a hard surface, taking 5*(2d6) damage!

>Miss 4
The whip hits a hard surface, taking 2*(2d6) damage!

>Miss 5
The whip hits a hard surface, taking 5*(2d6) damage!

>Miss 6
The whip hits a hard surface, taking 2*(2d6) damage!

I need 4d6 for damage to the whip, and 2d4, the first for durability and the second for Stumpy.

Rolled 4, 2 = 6 (2d4)

>>50521347

How Stumpy didn't atomize himself I do not know.

>>50521398
His armor of life.

Rolled 2, 3, 4, 6 = 15 (4d6)

>>50521347

Rolled 5, 2, 4, 2 = 13 (4d6)

>>50521347
another cat o nine tails atomized.

>>50521398
>>50521418

Sir Suicide's leather chestpiece takes 4 damage.
2+2=4
Stumpy flogs himself for a measly 4 LP, and is largely unharmed.

The cat o' nine tails however?
10+6+20+6=42
It takes 42 durability damage and leaves the mortal coil.

>>50521417
It's just laughably broken.

>>50521255
Using this for hit severity:
>Chest or Upper Arms
>52
The first hit on the upper body is for standard damage.

>Upper Legs
As is the second.

>Chest or Upper Arms
AND the third.

I need 3d100 for Sir Suicide's blocking, and 3d4 for Stumpy's damage to his enemy.

Rolled 3, 2, 3 = 8 (3d4)

>>50521509
Every Cat has nine lives!

Rolled 25, 50, 72 = 147 (3d100)

>>50521509

I dreamed of this day
Sir Suicide, Breaker of the Cat

Rolled 5, 3 = 8 (2d8)

>>50521509
>>50521536

>Attack 1
The flogging hits Sir Suicide's upper body, while he tries to block he's much too slow, taking full damage. 1d10 durability damage.
3+2=5
He loses 5 LP, reducing him from 18 to 13 LP.

>Attack 2
Another attack hits Sir Suicide in the upper part of his legs, but he's able to block and cut the damage in half in return for 1d8 of durability damage.
(2+2)/2=2
He loses 2 LP, going down to 11 LP.

>Attack 3
A last attack for the upper body is blocked much like the one before it.
(3+2)/2=2.5=2
He loses further 2 LP, going down to 9 LP, but still very much allive.

Is Stumpy following up with an offhand attack with his sword?

>>50521622
I think he should do an offhand attack

>>50521622
Sir Suicide's chest armour is now destroyed, it's been flogged straight off him.

>>50521638
Then give me a 1d100, but this time we're a bit less accurate.

>>50521622
Absolutely an off-hand attack

Rolled 53 (1d100)

>>50521654
Swing true, sweet sword!

Rolled 76 (1d100)

>>50521654
rolling for Stumpy, but pulling for suicide

This system is quite a shit show still better than FATAL but some of these rolls really make me lose my sides.

>>50521666
>53
MISS

>>50521667
Stumpy strikes his sword into a hard surface, it takes 2*(1d6) durability damage.

Stumpy still has two attacks, so he can attack with his off-hand two more times.

Roll 1d100 for the next attack.

Rolled 2, 3 = 5 (2d6)

>>50521700

Rolled 96 (1d100)

>>50521700

Rolled 40 (1d100)

>>50521688
This game falls into one of the classic problems of "homemade systems": Which is "Time To Kill". as our play has demonstrated: time to kill is 1 combat round, not even, quite often it's 1/2 of a combat round.

Rolled 49, 60 = 109 (2d100)

>>50521735

>>50521735
if he murders Sir Suicide before Sir Suicide can move, he can loot the cat!

I'm sorry, disregard my deleted post, I'm getting tired and saw the wrong numbers.

>>50521716
Stumpy's Sword of Speed strikes a nearby stone surface and loses 10 durability, knocking it down to 25.

>>50521722
>96
So it's actually a miss.

>>50521749
>49
Again, Stumpy swings into the air and hits a hard surface, this time for 5*(1d6).

Roll a 1d6 to figure out if Stumpy still has a sword!

Rolled 5 (1d6)

>>50521783

>>50521801
RIP Stumpy's sword

>>50521816

At this point I'm just hoping Sir Suicide lives up to his name.

>>50521801
5*5=25
And 25 was just the amount of durability left on Stumpy's Longsword of Speed before this fumble, but it has now shattered.
Stumpy is unarmed.

He still has one action left though.
Roll 1d100 to try to punch Sir Suicide.

Rolled 14 (1d100)

>>50521829

Rolled 100 (1d100)

>>50521829

>>50521842
Hit!

>>50521846
>Location
>100
>Decapitation

So, uh, Stumpy just punched Sir Suicide's head straight off.

>>50521842
>>50521846

Um.

Correct me if I'm wrong, because I don't understand this system for shit, but...isn't that a decapitation?

>>50521862
>100
>not even a critical hit
>plain decapitation

this is insane

>>50521862
So... sir suicide... after surviving a full pass of the cat o' self destruction, after avoiding most of the damage from a super-flurry with the speed sword, has his head punched clean off...

SOMEONE CHECK STUMPY! HE'S DOPING.

File: Missed The Target.png (21 KB, 800x600)

21 KB PNG

>>50521862

Sweet Jesus that is Dwarf Fortress as fuck.

Updated Suicide for correctness.

Stumpy loots the shit out of that Cat-o-Nine and anything else remotely interesting.

>>50521862
Awww. I was hoping for a surprise upset.

>>50521862
>>50521865
>>50521881
It seems Stumpy is actually a Monk!

File: file.png (81 KB, 1293x895)

81 KB PNG

So, Stumpy starts the fight by flogging everything so hard that his cat o' nine tails explodes, but both fighters are still standing. Forced to use his off hand, Stumpy tries to hit Sir Suicide with his magical sword, but misses and shatters his sword.
Unarmed and frustrated, he uses his last action to punch Sir Suicide, a punch so blessed by Urist himself that it connects with Sir Suicide's head and rips it off the body.
That just happened.

>>50521881
This is the best system.

>>50521894
Stumpy can take the late Sir Suicide's Cat and his Magical Broadsword, the one that Sir Suicide wasn't strong enough to use.

>>50521897
It really could have happened, it was so close.

>>50521892
Get the armor for invisible elf. Also, make a wizard, pls. Fite wiz aginst winner.

>>50521894
>>50521923
A Mace a Cat-o-Nine-Tails and a Broadsword.. but Typhoon still has his x10 damage lances
The finals might be pretty fucking brutal, since these two will be evenly matched.. at least compared to all the other fights.

>>50521923
>This is the best system.

It's absolute insanity and madness.
Yes, it is.

>>50521947
After this is wizard duel.

>>50521934
>>50521957
I want this wizard duel.. I wanna see how awful magic combat is

File: Standings.png (93 KB, 1018x605)

93 KB PNG

It's time for the Grand Finale.
Are you hype? Who's your favourite? Predictions?

I'l be right back, I'll need to prepare stuff.

>>50521981
Which one goes first? That one's my prediction to win.

File: Ultimate Showdown.png (149 KB, 1956x741)

149 KB PNG

>>50521923

It's too epic.

I can't take it.

>>50521991
Highest Dex attacks first.. so Typhoon, I think.
Shitty Elves

>>50521981
Typhon is either fucked, or about to be completely destroyed... i legitimately have no idea.

>>50522012
Don't discount Typhoon yet. He deals mad damage with his Titan Ring and Lance of Quake, there's a decent chance he'll kill Stumpy instantly.

>>50522072
Yeah, but so far, both of his enemies have died Via self-obliteration. he's completely untested,

>>50522072
>implying stump won't implode before Typhoon does anything

Okay, roll 2d100 for wealth.

Rolled 51, 40 = 91 (2d100)

>>50522086

Rolled 6 (1d6)

>>50522096
That's 1d10x100 for Typhoon and 1d6x 100 for Stumpy. I'll roll both.

Rolled 1 (1d10)

>>50522113

File: file.png (87 KB, 1305x893)

87 KB PNG

Rolled 7 (1d10)

This is it, the final showdown.
I'm not sure if there's anything to buy or change around, but now's the time to make changes if you want to.

>>50522140

Just get right in there and do it to it. Let's see who comes out ahead - the Elf(?) or the Champion of Urist.

>>50522140
So, what's Typhoon's backstory? Apart from misfortune happening to those close to him/her

>>50522140
Stumpy looks good, Typhoon can't really do much ..so yeah, everything looks good.
>>50522171
Wondering this too.

>>50522175
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pqv_LUStxDw

>>50522188
10/10

File: file.png (28 KB, 703x175)

28 KB PNG

Rolled 7 (1d10)

Ladies, Gentlemen and Shadowbeings, this is it.
The final, most important battle of this entire tourney, this entire FumbleBowl. We've certainly had our favourite moments and our favourite characters, but it all ends here.
A winner will be chosen.

There's not a lot to say about the last two fighters, for you know them well.
Will it be Elf or Dwarf? Shadowsphere or Living Fortress? Earthquakelance or Exploding Whip? Ring of the Titans or Chainmail of Life?
Who will, all in all, come out on top? Who will be the greatest Atlantasia character /tg/ has ever seen,?

What I will say however, is that both fighters have equal Dex, and that the game has no rules for what happens in this situation.
So, I will have to call for a roll of a 1d2.
If it is 1, Typhoon will go first.
If it is 2, Stumpy will go first.
First roll counts.

Happy rolling.

>>50522175
Who knows where maritime shadow-sphere Elves come from?

Rolled 2 (1d2)

>>50522262
>50522262

And we're off, with Stumpy as the first character to act!
The entire area around the arena is fully crowded, screaming masses struggling to see the heavily armoured Dwarf meet with the Elven ball of shadow and silence.

>>50522277
Roll me a 9d100.

Rolled 82, 81, 29, 69, 53, 65, 12, 37, 88 = 516 (9d100)

>>50522298

Rolled 24, 64, 79, 24, 56, 92, 51, 84, 92 = 566 (9d100)

>>50522298

Rolled 42, 56, 71, 63, 83, 49, 98, 15, 18 = 495 (9d100)

>>50522298
>>50522298
WHIP IT!

>>50522303
Pretty bad showing there.

>>50522315

As has been proved repeatedly, it only takes one.

>>50522327
Yeah, but weapons explode as often as people.

>>50522327
I will laugh my ass off if Stumpy manages to obliterate both Typhoon and himself.

>>50522347

To be fair, that hasn't actually stopped them from killing people in the process.

>>50522354
I expect a homicide-suicide, at the very least.

>>50522384

Suicide already got homicided.

>>50522303
>Miss
>Miss
>Hit
>Miss
>Miss
>Miss
>Hit
>Hit
>Miss
Again, six misses and three hits with the cat.

>>50522309
Locations:
>Lower Legs
>Chest or Upper Arms
>Lower Abdomen or Forearms
>Lower Legs
>Chest or Upper Arms
>Lower Abdomen or Forearms
>Chest or Upper Arms
>Lower Abdomen or Forearms
>Lower Abdomen or Forearms

>>50522313
Misses:
>Miss 1
>42
The whip hits a hard surface, taking 5*(2d6) damage!

>Miss 2
>56
The whip hits a hard surface, taking 3*(2d6) damage!

>Miss 3
>71
The whip hits a hard surface, taking 2*(2d6) damage!

>Miss 4
>63
The whip hits a hard surface, taking 3*(2d6) damage!

>Miss 5
>83
The whip actually hits Typhoon in Lower Abdomen or Forearms, for 1d6 durability loss.

>Miss 6
The whip hits a hard surface, taking 3*(2d6) damage!

THE WHIP DID NOTHING EXCEPT BLOW UP

I'm going to need 6d6, and I'll use the last one for durability.

Rolled 1, 6, 6, 2, 6, 6 = 27 (6d6)

>>50522405

Rolled 2, 1 = 3 (2d2)

>>50522414
5+18+12+6+18=59
The Cat o' Nine Tails, which has 4 durability hitpoints, takes a massive 59 durability damage, possibly shifting it into another dimension, because it's certainly not anywhere near the arena anymore.

>>50522444

What about the hits?

Rolled 2, 1 = 3 (2d2)

>>50522444
And the 5th Miss hits the left forearm of Typhoon for 6 durability damage, ripping his studded leather bracer straight off.

Roll 6d100 , the first half for severity of hits and the second for blocks.

>>50522458
I'm getting there.

Rolled 84, 69, 3, 92, 4, 51 = 303 (6d100)

>>50522481

This shit is tense, man! (And hilarious)

>>50522492
>Hit 1:
Typhoon is hit in his right forearm for 3x damage, but manages to block it entirely, instead just taking 1d4 durability damage.

>Hit 2:
Typhoon is struck in the chest by another "tail" for 2x damage, and completely fails blocking, adding another 2x modifier and 1d20 durability damage.

>Hit 3:
Stumpy's last hit is barely one, and hits the abdomen for just 1/4 of damage, which is cult in half again at the cost of 1d8 durability points.

I need 3d4 to see if Typhoon survives the second hit.

Rolled 2, 3, 1 = 6 (3d4)

>>50522559

Rolled 4 (1d4)

>>50522559
I'm rolling durability for that first strike.

>>50522569
The first his comes towards Typhoon at a frightening velocity and force, but the Elf effortlessly manages to block it and negate all damage.
The third strike is so weak that it could hardly damage the Elf even if it hit him square on, but he nevertheless blocks also that skillfully, taking no damage.

But the second hit for (3+2)*4=20 LP
That is more than twice the amount of Typhoon's LP, which is 8.
In other words, amidst a storm of misses and blocked blows, one of the nine tails manages to strike Typhoon so severely that it knocks all life out of him.
Although the shadow remains, and the silence with it, the Elf inside is no longer alive.
There is only one left

All hail Stumpy the Dwarf Fortress, Champion of the Grand Tourney of Baba-Luna!

Rolled 4 (1d20)

Fin.

>>50522644

Get stump'd, elf.

Hail Stumpy! Hail Urist!

Jesus that Chainmail of Life was monstrous.

File: Typhoon.png (56 KB, 800x600)

56 KB PNG

>>50522644

Also thanks for doing this, OP. This was the best thread on /tg/ today.

Typhoon updated to reflect the changes.

Rolled 8 (1d8)

And last durability roll, just so that there is nothing left undone.

>>50522656
Oh yeah, it's hard to lose while wearing that.
Though it might not have lasted of Typhoon got to attack, just look at the damage General Butt Naked was able to do to himself.

File: file.png (88 KB, 1299x891)

88 KB PNG

I saw some of you mentioned wanting to fight a wizard, but I'll be completely honest here: I'm not going to do that.
I've been at this for hours now, and I'm much too tired to go learn how magic works. I need my sleep. Maybe some other time, I'd like to do something like this again, but not today.

Good night, thread. It was fun.

>>50522719
Thanks for the most fun I've had on /tg/ in ages, OP. Would like to see Stumpy take on a new roster of challengers someday.

Hail Stumpy! Hail Urist!

>>50522719
Thank you for showing us how amazing this system is. Truly, this will be the next Pathfinder.. I am sure of it!

File: Standings.png (99 KB, 1018x605)

99 KB PNG

I almost forgot to finish this. Now I'm done.

May Stumpy reign as king of the coliseum!

I kind of want to do one of these for SenZar, but it doesn't have random character generation. And it's not really that retarded anyway.

Did any of these ever happen for Synnibarr or Eoris?

>>50522878
Could you do it for Eoris? I thought the game was basically just being emotional at each other until one party loses the will to live.

This is awesome. I haven't had this much fun in a long time- please do it again.

>>50523631
>Could you do it for Eoris?
The problem is character creation takes ages, and unlike FATAL there's no program to speed it up.

It's also point-buy.

I'm fucking crying from how hard this made me laugh. What a trip.

>>50522795
That was A grade stuff, thanks.

File: Stump2.png (55 KB, 800x600)

55 KB PNG

>>50522795

I made one last edit for correctness.