[a / b / c / d / e / f / g / gif / h / hr / k / m / o / p / r / s / t / u / v / vg / w / wg] [i / ic] [r9k] [cm / hm / y] [3 / adv / an / cgl / ck / co / diy / fa / fit / hc / int / jp / lit / mlp / mu / n / po / pol / sci / soc / sp / tg / toy / trv / tv / vp / x] [rs] [status / ? / @] [Settings] [Home]
Board:  
Settings   Home
4chan
/qst/ - Quests


File: haremhornineleven.jpg (72 KB, 376x522)
72 KB
72 KB JPG
>>1049218

"Have you experienced someone dying? Can you recover from it relatively quickly? Can you
handle someone who is dying with compassion?"

“Hey Maximus, go play with Deso somewhere else." "Maximus." Far, blunt noises; must be
Deso riding Maximus. Soon, those stop. "It was during the Chasm. I lost my wife and both
little kids to the tsunami. It was just right after I left the surface to join the Third. "You glance at
your left. Then your eyes widen. A woman- no wait that's an Arma with shining blue hair,
standing right next to you... with a little smile on her face. "Had no time to mourn them,
though. Just as everything was going to hell, Maximus took me from the rubble and jumped
from the ship. Felt like falling for days." The Arma is leaning over the cellphone, silently.
Once she glances at you, she gets a finger on her lips and winks. "Got saved by one of the
ships down there. While searching for more survivors, we found another shipwreck about
to sink, got inside, and guess what." He pauses. "It seems one of the Hands ate a little
girl. It was just there, naked, crouching in a corner. Looked like mine."

Even through Preah came out of completely fucking nowhere, Roomba is still gloom as a
dark swamp with ravens. "I'm sorry to hear
about that. Do you need a moment? We can
resume some other time."

!'%& chuckles, yet again.Or is it a chuckle? "Hell, might as well end it now, right? Thing is,
we are keeping her a secret. I hope that's alright with you. Deso's just very white."

"What is your greatest strength, what is your greatest weakness?"

“I- well I tend to be too compassionate. Getting too involved makes you try your hardest… and
it also makes the fall hurt harder, you know? Hard stuff, but you either do your best or you
don’t. That’s how I do it.”

Preah’s head shakes with her eyes closed as if doing a silent giggle.

(Cont!)
>>
You look around; Trash's eyes dart between Preah and the closed door. Roomba, who's
staring at Preah, seems a little bit… sore?

"Ooooooooooooh. I see. You must be a very sensible man.” It’s Roomba... but Roomba's
mouth is shut. Yup. "So you found a stray, harmless human-form Hand and they've let you
keep it." When you look at your boss, she's giving this little pout, her eyes very still.

"Eh, yes. That's right."

"I think our good doctor would be very interested in her."

The line pauses. "Well, actually, she is." !'%&'s voice sound a bit louder. "Our kind doctor
Mi Abass is monitoring Deso's progress. We check with her every two weeks."

"My, that's a long time."

"One week, I mean, every two weeks she takes her physical exams."

"OOooooooh. Those must be very important." It's hard to miss; Preah's cheeks are growing
like yeast in a lemon cake. She blows the
air out, silently. "And she left her with you
instead of keeping her under secret. You must be very trust-worthy.

"Weeeeeeell, it's really supposed to be a secret..." !'%& sighs, then chuckles, "but what
the hell, I think I blew it already."

Room-Preh gasps. "You must be one of her scientists!"

"...Not exactly a scientist, but what the hell, yes! I work under the doctor." You hear a dim
"ooooooooooh!" from Roomba, well one on em, as !'%& laughs from the other side of the line.
"Our doctor decided the safest place for Deso was right in the open, and that it was important
for her to learn about the world. To understand Hands further. All of that."

Preah dances with her head, no less than with certain glee. "Ooooh, that is very admirable.
You must be very brave." !'%& keeps laughing from the other side of the line. "So, then," Preah
beams a powerful little smile, "why was your family in the Third during the Chasm?"

The line goes dead silent. So hard, and for so long, Trash actually pokes the cellphone thing
to see if it's working.

"I was a spy."

(Cont!)
>>
>>1054277

Holy Hell!
>>
Preah gasps. "A spy!"

"That's right, and the less said about that the better." !'%&'s voice suddenly sounds sharp
and informal. "Wouldn't want to give you information you can't handle."

"I see! I see!" The Roomba in Preah's voice sounds excited, but the same just /can't/ be
said for the source. "There's no need! I understand." Preah pauses. "So... maybe...
umm, I hope you won't get mad..."

"Shoot."

"But, it seems to me that maybe..." Preah actually gets one of her big hands to her mouth,
"that our good doctor may have given you Deso to fill the gap."

"You know," !'%& pauses, "I thought the same thing."

"Now everything makes sense." Preah nods and nods and nods. And it may be that your
Fake mind is growing old and dull, but you think that, maybe, !'%& just let out a little sigh. "You
met Deso after a Maximus took you and jumped out of the ship because Mi Abass sent
you on a secret mission with your family in order to spy the Third during the Chasm."
Preah nods. She's happy. You know that.

!'%& laughter across the line seems a bit too hard. "Crazy, huh?"

"Hahaha, well... Life is like that." Preah bows to Roomba. The Fake, before leaning onto the
cellphone gives a hard silent sigh.

And that is your Roomba. "Would you rather be respected or well-liked?" She sounds tired
though.

“…Eh, I think I’ll go with well-liked.”

"What's your favorite dessert?"

“Fruit. Apples, bananas… we get some every now and then.”

"Do you know if there are any kind people you don't get along with easily?"

“Nah, I’m easy to swallow.”

"Fill in the blanks: violence is blank, kindness is blank, fame is blank, money is blank"

“Violence is a tool, kindness is important, fame is an empty goal, money is life. Literally.”

"Someone says to you that this is all pointless because everyone will starve eventually and
humanity will be destroyed, how do you respond?"

“Remind our friend he was going to die anyway. Unless it’s a Fake or an Arma. Then just smile
and wave.”

"Are you OK with hugs and similar contact?"

“That doesn’t seem to matter to Deso, haha.”

"How are your people skills? Can you bluff your way out of a bad situation? Can you calm
somebody who is panicking or angry? Can you tell when a fight is likely to break out? Can you
spot when someone is trying to con you? Can you bargain for a good deal?"

“Let’s just say I know a bit of psychology. So: yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, and yes.”

"How are your emergency skills? Can you bandage a wound and splint a broken limb?
Does the sight of blood make you feel faint? Can you do basic ship repairs?"

“I know my way around first-aid and a bit of conventional medicine. I’m trained to perform
low-risk surgeries, and I’m at the same skill when it comes to ships. Hovercrafts, mostly.
Funnily, what I lack in the electrical department regarding mid or big ships, I make up in
knowledge of anima mechanisms.”

(Cont!)
>>
"Do you have any piloting skills? If so what kinds of ships?"

“Small ships, mid ships, big ships only once, hovercrafts all around.”

"How are your combat skills? What kinds of opponents would you feel confident fighting?
What kind of opponents are you poorly matched against?"

“Eh, pretty much anything. Except Anythings. I beat Hands on a daily basis.” !’%& chuckles.

"Do you have any other unique skills you haven't been asked about yet? What skill would
you say that you are best with?

“Nah, that’s about it…”

“What would your motto be?”

“Can’t be happy and normal. Same as these guys; it’s a team motto.”

“If you could have a room for you aboard the ship, what would it have?”

“Well, Deso wanted a dojo. If we can have that, it’ll be great. I just want a little workshop or a
sauna.”

“What makes you happy?”

“Eh… well, Deso does. She’s growing really fast, and she’s coming out very well. Really,
she’s smart as hell.”

When you look back, Preah is... balancing her whole body on the ledge of the couch behind
Roomba's head. Downwards. Both her legs are spreading towards the ceiling, and she's giving
your boss a little grin right from behind her. Yet, Roomba turns to you instead. And nods.
>>
>>1054667

You have no clue. Like, at fucking all. Also Mi Abass has been employed by the Second for a
long while now.
>>
>>1054391
"You place a good bit of trust in us by telling us all these secrets. What makes you think we're legitimate?

You knew Maximus before you met Deso right? Well not that much before but still, convenient how you meet a Hand whisperer and a cute little hand all in the same day. Have you been in contact with Maximus's tribe since then? I understand they're pretty keen on Hands.

Mi Abaas has a keen eye for talent, what would you say was her reason for employing you?"

>>1054743 was answering:
Also hey memory core, what the fuck do I know about how long it takes to get from here to Faust Vineyard?
>>
>>1054765

Is he still working as a spy?
While not asking directly, it's still something to think about.

As much as asking yourself if his work as a spy might interfere with the support center, maybe even against it (not neccecarily in his dirct knowledge, but still...)

Physical exams and weekly checkups...
Can we do those? Are they neccecary? Could the "medical expert" (us, right?) do those checkup? Would we need special equiptment for that?


And why don't we have formal wear Kimono? It's a must! Get one! How could one forget it? (By prioritizing survival, but that's besides the point)
>>
You frown... a "You place a good bit of trust in us by telling us all these secrets. What makes
you think we're legitimate?"

"There's just something about Roomba... I don't know how to explain it." You sense some awe
in !'%&'s voice, and a little blank expression on Roomba's face. "I can feel it. Wish I could put
it in words, but I'm dead sure she's worth the call."

"You knew Maximus before you met Deso, right?" You grin. Just a little. "Well not that
much before but sill, convenient how you met a Hand whisperer and a cute little Hand all in the
same day."

"That's right, I met the big guy before. We didn't get along at-fucking-all before, thought he had
another abs instead of a brain. Which is funny, given how he saved my life."

"Have you been in contact with Maximus's tribe since then? I understand they're pretty keen on
Hands."

"Never been there yet. It's a plan though."

"Mi Abass has a keen eye for talent." You sit straight, looking at the phone almost with
disdain. "What would you say was her reason for employing you?"

"That maybe that's the eye looking elsewhere." The cellphone laughs."Just being mean here. I
have some... experience, from the surface. Aint easy living there, you've got to know your stuff
from a to z. I did well for one of her ships and made friends with the captain, the guy put on
word from me, and oh well...!"

You notice Preah has been staring at you intently, and yet, without any kind of emotion
you can discern. As if her grin was a mask. The hornmother is hiding behind you.
>>
>>1054843
>>1054819
"From ship engineer to spy... interesting career path. Are you still on a covert mission from Mi Abass then? Any risk of a conflict of interest?"

As for the checkups, they're probably for Mi Abass's research more than for her health. Actually almost certainly. good idea asking about a conflict of interest though

"Tell me a story from 'The Surface' where your skills saved the day.

You three are a package deal correct?I assume that means you would want to be deployed together too then?

How do you and Trash know each other?"
>>
>>1054843
How did you two start to get along? What's changed between you?

Best make sure there's no bad links or hidden resentments.
>>
You play a bit with you fingers. "From ship engineer to spy... interesting career path. Are
you still on a covert mission from Mi Abass then? Any risk of a conflict of interest?"

"Nope, and nope. Doctor's been busy on a very secret proyect. As usual. So I'm off the hook. I
also already have a task of my own, as you can tell."

"Tell me a story from 'The Surface' where your skills saved the day."

"Eeeeeeeh, there's this one from when I used to pretend I was an arms dealer. Sold some
guys a rigged Pulsar cannon, knew they were up to no good. You just know, sometimes. They
blow themselves up when they tried to raid an EVAREST-VA. I guess that counts, eh?"

"You three are a package deal correct?" You flex your fingers against each other under your
chin. "I assume that means you would want to be deployed together too then?"

"You can send us alone, but Deso always has to go with one of us."

"How do you and Trash know each other?"

"Through that clusterfuck of an advertising campaign. We called, and had the pre-interview
with her. Then there was another, and now there's this one. You guys like your interviews, I
guess."
>>
Alright, nap time! Ill resume tomorrow morning, or If I can't sleep. =w=
>>
>>1055094
Good night. Thanks for running.

Even if I don't make these when they're live, I read them the first chance I get.

I want to see the herds comfy again.
>>
>>1055080
"You could say Roomba likes to get to know people.

What would you have done if you where wrong about the people you sold the pulse rifle too? even Roomba will admit she's not a perfect judge of people.

When did you and Maximus start to get along then?"
>>
"You could say Roomba likes to get to know people."

"Hell, I can tell. She'll love Deso, I'm sure."

"What would you have done if you where wrong about the people you sold the pulse rifle too?
Even Roomba will admit she's not a perfect judge of people."

"Oh, but I don't judge people." The line pauses just a bit, giving you enough time to glance at
your boss, who's glancing at you. "I judge facts. Aint hard to tell when it's not for self
defense. There is this kind of people, these kind of guys... they don't go get their food, that's
hard and dangerous. So they take it from others. And guess what, now the danger is
above."

"When did you and Maximus start to get along then?"

"Right after he throw me out of a the Befimith."

"So," It's not Roomba. "Mi Abass has no problems with Deso joining a Support Center."

"Nope, not at all. Deso can fend off for herself."

"Ooooooh, she must be very strong for a little girl, then!" Preah grins, her eye- it's Roomba's
face with Roomba's voice, without the Roomba. Ok.

"...Yeah. Yeah, well, she's a Hand, after all."
>>
>>1055241
We should mention something. We seem to be losing it.
>>
>>1054206
Geez i need to get into this one day.

One day. I gotta stop being a lazy shit.
>>
>>1055241
>>"her eye-"
"Her eyes closed-" ashjkdahsdkahdsjk!
>>
>>1055282
Pretty sure it's just Preah doing a really damn good impression of Roomba, unless I'm missing something?

>>1055760
You really should! The back logs aren't that long so far!

>>1055241
"That's all I have, anything else Roomba?"

Either this guy is completely full of shit out he's well connected. I'm leaning towards "full of shit" myself.
>>
>>1057363

So...
Nobody?
Just me?
OK then.

We should get Preah out for a moment. Just... anything, really. A book, maybe something else, I don't know. Just far enough to make sure she won't hear what we will ask.

For I know but one singular question for the most reasonable person of the bunch we had.

"Why does Deso 'not like'/hate Armas?"

If it's because of the GOG -gas, that's not a problem.
But if it's something else...
Either Deso will learn that not every Arma is terrible, or...
Let's just ask outself: "Can Preah make up for an entire team of 3, or will she continue doing... whatever she WAS doing before that."
>>
>>1057171

You know where the ladder is, don't you?
>>
You let some time flow, but no words fill the air.

"That's all I have." You declare, from your comfy throne of this wasteland. "Anything else,
Roomba?"

"Nothing futher!" Aaaaand nope, it isn't Roomba. "Oh. Wait, one little thing."

"Yeah? Sure?" The voice from the phone seems a bit off.

"We, too, are working along under our good doctor." Preah, as she speaks, is now...
balancing herself over Roomba's head. With a hand. Backwards. Over her head. Over her god
damned head. "Your little Deso will be in good "Hands". I promise!" Preah sends a kiss
towards the cellphone. "Be seeeing yooooou!"

"...w-wait."

Roomba turns it off, half her head still hidden under Preah's massive hand

"You know," she says, her eyes still hidden under a hand, "I had more questions for him."

"Ooooooooh, you had more questions." Preah finally tilts herself from Roomba's head, falling
slowly against any possible measure of gravity until she pomf next to the Fake. "That is very
interesting."

Trash stomps a little. "Greet me you utter fuck."

"Hi uncle."

"Now, what the fuck was that all about? You know the fucks?" One of the templar's eyes
twitches.

"Oooooooh..." Preah gives a little smile. "No."

The contrast between their voices is rather extreme. While Roomba's is high-pitched and
eager, Preah's is slow, deep, and lacks any kind of emotion. Not only her voice; the Arma's
gestures, manners, her sleepy-looking eyes... Everything is so neutral, it's tempting to
assume that not even Roomba can read her.

After all, Preah's a Fake too. And taller than you.

"When are we going down?" she asks.
>>
>>1057369

NO.
=<
>>
>>1057377
"Does that mean you're volunteering then?"

To Trash: "Uncle? Really Beans?
>>
You stare at Preah."Does that mean you're volunteering then?"

"Beamy, she was since day fucking one," Trash adds, "the problem is her maintenance."

"Uncle? Really Beans?" You give the templar a soft little glare.

"There's no way to stop her." Trash answers, her eyes downcast. "Preah and Vaal are
polar opposites all but one thing; both do whatever the fuck they want."

"Ooooooh. And don't you?"

"Armas don't have asses, so no."
>>
>>1057414
"It's not really volunteering if you're expecting us to pick up a big tab, that's work or maybe barter... What kind of maintenance exactly?"

Hey memory core, what the fuck do I know about Arma maintenance?
>>
Apparently, unless you freeze them every once in a while the Armas start melting. And we are
talking DEEP freeze here. They've got special labs in which they lock themselves into for a
while, and it gets extremely cold in there. That's why you don't see many stray Armas around,
without that they are fucked.
>>
>>1057459

It's also expensive. More or less like two salaries at once.
>>
>>1057459
Temperature range? Approaching 0 Kelvin? Enough to freeze air? Enough to liquify air? Alcohol ice bath? A good refrigerator?
>>
>>1057522
How should I know?
>>
>>1057525
Time to find out then.

>>1057459
"Do they make you exhale and hold your breath in the fridge? If not do you breathe fog for awhile after you get out? If you coughed afterwards, not that you'll likely have any reason to, but if you ever did did you coughed up a boiling blue-grey liquid? A smoking greyish solid? Depending on your answers and how much power it would take I might be able to build something that could keep you from melting"
>>
>>1057545

"Do they make you exhale and hold your breath in the fridge?" You ask the Arma, who looks at
Roomba. who blinks. "If not, do you breathe fog for a while after you get out?"

"Armas don't breath, Fakes don't breath, and Preah is both," Trash explains to you, politely,
"fuckhead."

You nod and nod, as if nothing. "If you coughed afterwards, not that you'll likely have any
reason to, but if you ever did, did you cough up a boiling blue-grey liquid?" Preah tilts to the
other side. "A smoking grayish solid?" And now to the other, dragging her hair. "Depending on
your answers and how much power it would take, I might be able to build something that
could keep you from melting."

Trash blinks hard two times over. "You fucking what." Well, well... now you are the epicenter of
attention. It draws a sharp wide grin from you, no subtlety.

"Oooooooooh..." Yet, no surprise at all.

"Let me get this straight." Yup. The eye flinching thing. "All your knowledge comes from
a particular set of fuck-nuggets with weird fetishes. If you know how to pull that stuff, it
means they know too. And if they do, and it's not expensive as fuck, they would have done it
already."

"Bullshit", says your Memory Core. They know. Even if she is right, and even if that raises a lot
of questions.

How do you know? Well- you know.
>>
>>1057571

They probably didn't build it for exactly that reason.

Because that machine doesn't have anything to do with their weird fetishes.

Probably.
>>
>>1057571
"The flipflop wearing dickwaffles are pretty savvy, think about it: there has already been one rebellion in Armas, and the whole point of them is that they're the strongest weapons around. The strongest weapons around with human brains. Without the leash of maintenance whats to keep them from going mercenary? demanding remotely fair wages? or worse yet, taking over themselves?

I bet life is pretty fucking sweet if you're a nigh unkillable death machine in one of those judge-grade anima suits. The last thing you want is some uppity living anima suit ruining your fun with things like actually giving a fuck about people and taking the time to actually improve shit. People smart enough to know how to put the bits together in a way that could actually wok for that are smart enough to know that you may as well be building void bombs and pulse rifles in your basement for how seditious something like that would be. "Hey godly super-weapons, work for me and you'll never have to pay for the one necessity you have in life ever again!" Yeah that'll go over real well with the people on top... Not that I'm not willing to try anyways.

There is a few ways that my idea could go wrong but as long as I have a few bits of frozen anima around to do some tests on I can make sure they don't happen.

As for why I'm explaining all this in front of our acrobatic volun-ployee here is a simple disjunction, either she's on the side of the fucks on top in which case Toasts little mission was doomed from day one or she's not and everything is peachy. We're just as fucked by telling her as we are if we didn't, but I can get a bit of interesting information from her in the latter case, and thus I opted to speak.

Also just because a silicon-nipple-licking gel-hedgehog knows some facts doesn't mean they've put them together. I was built to to that shit and I'm still only on par with a smart and decently well educated human... That said I bet they've figured it out but see no reason to do it, after all they can build a fucking army of their own if they really wanted to. I have to respect the original Sansui, he had a damn good plan for when the fucks on top came for him. It's his chucklefuck forks that I want to drown in their own vats of hair gel."
>>
"The flip-flop wearing dickwaffles are pretty savvy, think about it." Preah gives you her
neutral grin, next to a barely irked Roomba. Meanwhile, the hormother risks her life for a
cookie. She hides behind Trash this time, instead. "There has already been one rebellion
in Armas, and the whole point of them is that they're the strongest weapons around."

"Ajam," Preah says, in her deep, eager? tone.

"The strongest weapons around with human brains. Without the leash of maintenance,
what's to keep them from going mercenary? Demanding remotely fair wages? Or worst yet,
taking over themselves?"

"You know, that's what everyone thinks." Trash points out, facing you with her thighs spread
and her feet floating. "And that is exactly why the first gen Armas were a fucking disaster.
They tried to rule them with fear."

"The things you told me... those were no jokes, were they?" Roomba turns to Preah, who
maintains her mask-grin.

"Oh, no, and It was worst than that. Far worst than that, Rum." Roomba shivers, as Preah
does the Roomba face back at her. "Oooooh, but you don't need to know that. Nono. You can
live without that."

"Details aside, those retards at the First tried to enslave them with sadism. My point is that,
after Lost, their strategies changed." Trash frowns. "Now they treat them the very best
they can, pretending that Lost never happened."

"I bet life now is pretty fucking sweet if you're a nigh unkillable death machine in one of those
judge grade anima suits."

"Armors." Preah points out, her head dancing from side to side.

You acknowledge her. "The last thing you want is some uppity living anima suit ruining your fun
with things like actually giving a fuck about people and taking the time to actually improve
shit." Roomba raises an eyebrow. "People smart enough to know how to put the bits together in
a way that could actually work for that are smart enough to know that you may as well be
building void bombs and pulse rifles in your basement for how seditious something like that
would be." You make a magic megaphone with your hands. 'Hey godly super-weapons, work
for me and you'll never have to pay for the one necessity you have in life ever again!'" You give
a long, sharp giggle, as Trash nods at you. "Yeah, that'll go over real well with the people
on top... Not that I'm not willing to try anyways."

(Cont!)
>>
"You are more than fucking welcome to try," Trash points out, "but Armas aren't on a leash
anymore. They've been tamed. Bought with love and care. They believe their sacrifices to
be heroic. The Armas that defend their ships do so mostly because they actually give a fuck, no
money in the galaxy is worth fighting Hands." Trash doesn't sigh, but for a second there her
blond hair remains very still. "They die gruesome deaths, Hands wrap around their
body and constrict their bones until there's nothing but dust. I'm not an Arma," Trash leans
back, both her hands behind her nape, "but death by melting slowly doesn't seem far
worst."

"Ooooooh, so you think so." Trash opens her mouth but doesn't reply to Preah. The Arma
does a little dance with her bulky, black legs as she turns at her. "Some of the military Armas
that end up defecting have found a very cold place. A glacier. One of many." Preah grabs a
cookie and crushes it over her hand, then grabs the chocolate chips one by one. "It's not
enough to keep their bodies sturdy, of course. It's enough to live."

"There are a few ways that my idea could go wrong but as long as I have a few bits of frozen
anima around to do some tests on I can make sure they don't happen."

"Oooooh. Do I count?" Preah asks, permagrinning.

"Wouldn't that be dangerous? She's an Arma and I know bu-" Preah spins to Roomba,
smiling at her. When the Fake notices, she insta-pouts. "Nevermind."

(Cont!)
>>
"As for why I'm explaining all this in front of our acrobatic volun-ployee" you look at her directly,
"here is a simple disjunction, either she's on the side of the fucks on top in which case Toasts
little mission was doomed from day one or she's not and everything is peachy. We're just
as fucked by telling her as we are if we didn't, but I can get a bit of interesting information from
her in the latter case, and thus I opted to speak."

"Ooooooooh." Her eyes widen without bright. "You are very hard to understand. You must be
very deep."

"She thinks you are allied with !'%& and little Deso to fuck us over hard." Trash states then
intercepts the hornmother just as this one grabs the last cookie and throws it at the What. The
face of the hornmother makes Roomba pretty much jump from the couch. "But I know you
aren't, because if you were I'd beat the shit out of you and you don't want that."

"I'd beat the shit out of you!" It's Trash's voice on a much higher pitch.

Trash turns to you. "She's safe." Her voice just now was sturdy as whatever Preah's made of.
"As for !'%&'s super spy life and tragedy?" She shakes her head. "Crystal-clear bullshit, fit to
be the main jewel in Corny's crown. Or not even that. Fuck me if I'm wrong."

"No." You state with a soft smile. "Also just because a silicon-nipple-licking gel-hedgehog"
Trash's eyes widen, "knows some facts doesn't mean they've put them together. I was built to
do that shit and I'm still only on par with a smart and decently well-educated human..."
You don't hear well what Roomba says as she drags the hornmother to the kitchen. Only a
'WAH?' "That said I bet they've figured it out but see no reason to do it, after all, they can
build a fucking army of their own if they really wanted to. I have to respect the original Sansui,
he had a damn good plan for when the fucks on top came for him. It's his chucklefuck forks that
I want to drown in their own vats of hair gel."

"Who are, exactly, inch by inch, like he was." Trash frowns while showing all of her teeth; you
don't know what that means. "Perfect copies, all of them. At least in personality. But yeah,
killing nine hundred perverts is harder than killing one. Basic math." She yawns then and
scratches her head. "As for what in the fuck they've got in mind? Nope; don't ask me."

"No army, though." It's Preah, suddenly behind you. You turn to look at her, she's crouching
behind the couch and grabbing the ledges on a cat-like fashion, her grin still there. "They've
gone broke."
>>
>>1058582
"Broke as in no water in the bank broke? Cause yesterday they certainly had enough scrap around and power to the shop. Between those two things I can't imagine them wanting anything else."
>>
>>1058582
What are the consequences? Other than a collapse of the hair gel market.
>>
>>1057459

Good thing the Red Disaster has a cooler and by cooler I mean a freezer so damm cold it runs on videogame logic or it would deep freeze the ship otherwise.

Hope Desu and CAT never meet.

Let's say that she meet a Wonderland themed Anything whi had a bunch of Alice in Wonderland themed Hands... and the Red Disaster lost a third of it's fleet that day.
>>
You tilt your head to the side, without expression. "Broke as in no water in the bank
broke? Cause yesterday they certainly had enough scrap around and power to the shop.
Between those two things, I can't imagine them wanting anything else."

Preah nods at you, slowly. "You got that completely right, and that's the thing. Give the
boys some tools, some steel, a room, a lamp, and that's it. They asked for nothing more."

"Yeah, well..." As you turn to Trash the Arma vaults over the couch and lands next to
you."Let's not forget that everytime those fuckers had too many resources shit happened.
Shit as in, /SHIT/." Trash gives an odd pout of approval, as Roomba returns with yet another
bowl of cookies and an orbiting hornmother. Trash points at the Arma. "Preah here is the
straw that broke the camel's back Now they don't even let them make Armas anymore."

"That and the Chasm." Preah grins.

"That was the joke, actually." As Trash talks, you take a closer look at Preah. There's a slight
contrast in the brightness of the material her headband is made of and the rest of her
metallic parts. The "T R Y" letters on her headband, however, are deep dark like all of the
"rubble" parts that would be the meat. "Point being, you may be better at them at mixing
stuff, but even then I'm dead sure as ultra-fuck those guys can make Arma regeneration cells.
Maybe they are forbidden to make them because of market stuff or in the case of a
rebellion, but what the hell." Trash shrugs. "If you can pull one out, we could even rent it to
stray Armas. It would be fucking awesome."

"That being said," Roomba finally sits, as the hornmother dives into the bowl, "we should
start the interview."

When Preah's eyes widen you sense no bright at all, no sudden gestures. "Oooooooh... so I'm
not hired, then."

"NOPE. Not yet." Roomba's wide grin seems... forced. "Even bullies have to do the interview."

"Ooooooooh." Preah smiles."I'm a bully."

"Yup."

"That is very fascinating." Preah nods, smiling, her eyes closed.

Roomba takes a pointless deep breath.

(Cont!)
>>
How do I play this quest?
>>
"In this interview, I'm going to ask some rather tough questions that might bring up bad
memories for you. I will treat you with the greatest... to be blunt this job takes
lives. It breaks people. Kindness takes strength, am an inhuman amount at times. I
need to know these things so I don't put you into situations you can't handle."

"Hey, you forgot the hugs part.” Trash points out.

Roomba’s eyes widen as she pouts-“She doesn’t want hugs or cuddles! She’s just a
cold…mean… bully!”

“Oooooooooh!” Preah gets both hands to her mouth, yet her feet dance back and forth. “I feel very offended.”

"You walk into your apartment, Leateli is sitting down to a cup of tea with a side of armed
hostage-taking. What do you do?"

“Underground crumb sandwich dealing through proxy, starting with our main specialty:
Roquefort cheese and ham with lettuce.”

Trash turns her head towards the Arma, suddenly. Then shakes it. “No tomato. You
wouldn’t last a day in the mafia.”

Preah raises a finger. “I don’t see your underground tuna sandwich reign anywhere
either.”

“Which is exactly the point,” Trash blows air through her nose, satisfied.

"A stubborn horn mother,” Roomba rumbles, “is on the radio insisting she can drive the ship just
fine... right after you tell her how to get it out of reverse. It hasn't crashed yet, but the odds
aren't good. What do you do?"

“I don’t see tomato going well with blue cheese now that I think of it.”

“Never said it would,” Trash adds, “but it could. I’ve seen it happen. Maybe it works.”

“Preah,” Roomba deadpans.

“I’d disarm Leateli, let the hostage flee, then have her scare the hornmother.” Preah’s head
dances. “She was fourteen when I was three, and I’m eleven now.”

“I think that uber-fuck is even older than that, but hey, interview.” Trash warns.

"A ship calls in requesting some Anima to fuel their ship after forgetting to activate hover
mode over-night. What do you do?"

“Oooooooh, so that can happen?” Nobody answers. She gets a balled-up fist under her
chin. “I’d give it to them and take some of their stuff. People don’t stop being silly be getting
eaten by They’s.”

"What is the biggest problem you've had to face and how have you overcome it?"

“I killed someone when I was little. On accident.” Her feet dance near the table.
“Oooooh… But you knew that.”

“Nielly doesn’t.” Roomba’s expression hardens. Just a bit. “Take this seriously. We are going
down there to save people.”

“Take this seriously.” Before you noticed, Preah’s hand grabs your shoulder, her arm
behind your head. You close your eyes, lift her hand, and throw it back at her. “But I am very
serious.” It’s like she didn’t notice.

"What is less stressful for you: working on your own or having someone work with you?"

“I don’t mind company.” She shakes from side to side, you step away from her without
subtlety.

(Cont!
>>
"What approach do you prefer to problem-solving: the tried and true approach you know,
or trying new ideas and adjusting them as you go?"

“I’m very creative.” It’s like her voice is an endless, peaceful pit surrounded by trees and
monkeys.

"What would you rather have to deal with (non-violently): A hornmother's tantrum or a radar
malfunction?"

“Hornmothers are very easy to scare.” The hornmother throws a cookie at her face, which
Preah catches.

"What are your motivations for joining me?”

“It’s you,” Preah smiles, giggling in silence.

“Wait, is this something romantic?” Trash asks, but Roomba shakes her head. “It’s strange
enough how you deal with her.”

“For her, that’s an honor.“ Roomba glares at the Arma, who rolls her eyes and tilts her feet.
It’s a soft glare, however, even comical to watch. “She /loves/ watching me angry.”

The Arma whistles slowly.

“At what point does making money outweigh having a meaningful job for you? Assuming you
have a roof over your head at least."

“I just need my cold baths.”

"Have you experienced someone dying? Can you recover from it relatively quickly? Can you
handle someone who is dying with compassion?"

Preah pauses… as in, a literal pause. Somewhere, someone presses the ‘Play’
button. “I had a very lucky life, and I was lucky enough to meet someone who made me see
that.” And suddenly, you finally feel a hint of something in her voice. “Marcos died recently to
a heart attack. He was one of my four daddies,
he has been with me half my life.” Preah downcasts her eyes. “Sweet dreams, you
lovely fuck.”

You glance at Roomba; as the Arma stood still, the Fake started to tremble. Her feet shaking
against the floor, It’s like watching a toaster overheating. Finally, she stands, walks up to
Preah, kneels between her legs, and hugs her tightly. The Arma fully embraces her.

“Oooooh,” Preah caresses the back of her head, “so there were hugs in the interviews.”

“I’ll sell the Support Center, go Arma, and beat the fuck out of you,” Roomba warns, her face
buried into the Arma’s cold neck as Preah kisses her hair.

As Preah grabs her butt, Roomba slaps her hand.

(Cont!)
>>
And yet, the Fake’s sitting between her black bulky legs.

"What is your greatest strength, what is your greatest weakness?"

“You.”

“Besides me.”

“Oooooh, how about… ‘I’m an Arma, I can’t use GOG-gas?’”

“Not sure if that does it,” Trash adds, “it's kind of like saying that not having giga jet-fueled
anima wings is a weakness.”

Preah nods. “That’s a very good point.” She gets a fist under her chin, staring at the
ceiling. It seems everyone has their quirks when it comes to thinking. “I can swim, and
fast, but I’m kind of useless in the water. Oh, I know a good one.” She turns to you, wtf. “When
an Arma gets shot anywhere that isn’t the head with a very veery concentrated Pulsar, it pretty
much nukes everything around.”

“Yeah, it’s quite a bang.” Trash bites her lips. “That’s easy to avoid, though, with half a brain.”

"Would you rather be respected or well-liked?"

“I don’t mind what others think of me.”

“Not even Roomba?” Trash asks.

“Not even Roomba.” Preah hugs the Fake towards her, who gives a bored look.

"What's your favorite dessert?"

“Roquefort and ham sandwich with lettuce.”

“Fuck you,” Trash adds.

"Do you know if there are any kind people you don't get along with easily?"

“I’m very friendly.” Trying to see past her grin is like trying to figure out a pitch-black abyss
without leaping inside with a lantern. “I don’t like careless orders, though, and I won’t follow
those.”

"Fill in the blanks: violence is blank, kindness is blank, fame is blank, money is blank"

“Violence is a bad, kindness is good, fame is good, money is what the Cross Boss is taking
from the tips.”

"Someone says to you that this is all pointless because everyone will starve eventually and
humanity will be destroyed, how do you respond?"

“Not me,” Preah smiles.

(Cont!)
>>
"Are you OK with hugs and similar contact?" Roomba pouts. “This interview has become a
reflex by now.”

“No, I’m not at all.” She hugs Roomba. “You can’t hug me, only I can. Which makes you a
bully, since you just did.”

“How far is the Friend and my income for the next three years from an Arma surgery?

“That’s the worst about Preah,” Trash adds calmly, grabbing another cookie from the bowl
which the hornmother steals from her. “You can’t bully her.”

"How are your people skills? Can you bluff your way out of a bad situation? Can you calm
somebody who is panicking or angry? Can you tell when a fight is likely to break out? Can you
spot when someone is trying to con you? Can you bargain for a good deal?"

“Oooooooooh.” She smiles. “Yes.”

Roomba looks at you. “She’s bad at that.”

"How are your emergency skills? Can you bandage a wound and splint a broken limb?
Does the sight of blood make you feel faint? Can you do basic ship repairs?"

“Both at a basic degree,” Preah says. “I can do minor surgeries, first aid, and basic electrical
diagnostic. No idea on anima at all.”

"Do you have any piloting skills? If so what kinds of ships?"

“Hovercrafts and small ships.” Preah grins. “I know a lot of basic stuff.”

"How are your combat skills? What kinds of opponents would you feel confident fighting?
What kind of opponents are you poorly matched against?"

“I’m a fake Fake Arma Fake Hunter. Soooo… everything!”

“Yeah well, except Hands. And Anythings.” Trash points out. “Also that would be a ‘Fake
Arma fake Fake Hunter’.”

“Oooooooooh.”

"Do you have any other unique skills you haven't been asked about yet? What skill would
you say that you are best with?

“I can’t use GOG gas.” You blink, and your face frowns entirely. Where there used to be a Fake
sitting over an Arma now rests a strange blur of dim colors, vaguely meshing with the
surrounding. “But, I got an Arma Meta, so I can use darklights like the They’s do, on myself or
others. They can see where I am, and where I’m going, but… they can’t see what I’m doing.”
When the darklights fade, Preah is sitting over Roomba’s lap. Grinning. “I can also manipulate
the weight of every part of me independently to greatly varying degrees. I’m great at everything
Armas can do but don’t do because their GOG gas makes irrelevant.”

“Show me what you can do. Impress me.” Roomba blinks. “If there is anything else, I
guess?”

Preah calmly lifts a glass with water from the table, and shows it around. You look at it and
raise an eyebrow. The Arma seems proud about the feat.

(Cont!)
>>
“All Armas come with the same monstrous strength, and they all can use it to maximum
effect.” Trash explains, looking at your form the side. “What makes an Arma more deadly than
others is /how/ they use it. What our little blue fuck here is showing us is much more
meaningful than the darklights or anti-weight or whatever, it’s something they only get through
solid discipline.” Trash opens a palm towards you and Roomba. “Delicacy. And Armas are
NOT disciplined.”

Preah grabs the glass between two fingers, carefully tilting it from side to side with a third.
Trash points at it. “Try doing that with two cranes instead of hands. That’s just how
fucking hard that is.”

“What would your motto be?” Roomba asks, her features a bit twisted.

“Remember to bully.”

“If you could have a room for you aboard the ship, what would it have?”

“I think a steel bar would be enough,” Preah says,”but If I get to be picky then I want a
chess board.”

“Is that being picky?” Trash asks.

“What makes you happy?”

“I like my family.” She smiles. “I even miss the broken horn Leader.”

Roomba nods. “Me too.” She pauses the for a while, but finally winks at you.
>>
>>1060896
"Don't forget to bully. Huh. And Toast likes you? Opposites really do attract.

You know Toast, you can exact your revenge due all her bullying by toasting her into a puddle with hugs. You almost actually are bullying her!

Beans, Toast you seem to know her capabilities pretty well. Just how good are her basic skills? Actually solid, or closer to Blankey's skill level?"
>>
>>1060559
Players feed me ideas and as long as they aren't redundant or obviously silly/out of character I'll try to work it in. Sorta like "Everyone is John" but I have final say. Not nearly as interactive, but the player character is much more consistent in actions and ideals this way. Haremhorn wanted to try a different format for questing and here we are. I hope at least one other person likes it besides me lol.
>>
"Don't forget to bully. Huh. And Toast likes you?" You tilt your head with a sharp grin.
"Opposites really do attract."

"It's not like.. that much like that." Roomba shakes her head. "Preah's a mean bully, yes, of
course, but only because she thinks it helps people." Then she pouts. "Even if it doesn't."

"But it does." Preah leans from her side, Roomba doesn't turn to look.

"You know Toast, you can exact your revenge due all her bullying by toasting her into a puddle
with hugs." You lean forward as well, resting your chin on a bridge of hands. "You almost
actually are bullying her!"

"Death by warm cuddling." Trash nods to herself, pensively. "To think that /can/ actually
happen..."

"She's safe." Roomba's pout upholds. "Preah's like the coldest thing ever. Which is nice
actually, I like cold, cold is nice." Your boss nods to herself as if that was a matter of inter
ship security. "But she doesn't like heat at all because Armas are like that, so she won't let
me melt her." Those last words come with a scowl at the leaning headband.

"Beans, Toast you seem to know her capabilities pretty well. Just how good are her
basic skills? Actually solid, or closer to Blankey's skill level?"

"Basic." It's Roomba that answers. "She has basic knowledge on a lot of things his foster
family taught her."

"I know what "fuck" means." Preah grins.

"Why would you even say that," Roomba asks, then laughs awkwardly. "Judging on the little I
saw from Vaal, I think she's two or three steps ahead."

"Ooooooooh. Vaal is Blanky." Preah rests her chin over Roomba's head, her eyes elsewhere.
"So she's coming too."

"Yep, I'm coming too!" And It's Vaal. She stomps in without a care and two very big white
backs, that she just drops at the kitchen's entrance. "Phew!" She cleans the sweat on her
forehead.

"H-how the fuck did you get in?" Trash asks, getting a hand on her head. "How the fuck does
everyone keep getting in my house?"

Vaal blinks. "Door was open." She does the Roomba. "And I know the guy below, so I just
had to ask. Still, I'm not done yet." As she stares a Preah and Roomba, you think you saw
a little glare, now lost in her smile. "See ya!" she heads for the door.

"Hey! How did Leate-" And the door is closed. Trash stands. "Typical. She's the kind that likes
surprises, so let's see..." she goes up to the bags, then peeks inside one of them. "...WHY."

(Cont!)
>>
The templar buries a hand in the bag, and when she takes it out there's... a plushie. And holy
fuck no, not any kind of plushie.

"So this is her idea of advertising." Trash shakes the Roomba plushie, taps it, gets it
close to her ear, throws it up and down.... then finally starts throwing one at everyone,
Roomba's landing on her face.

You study it. It's a mini-Roomba with a big head. It has her duster, head-thing, and the
limbs are plain. While the plushie is undeniable "cute" in her own sense, it does
feel off somehow... particularly the eyes, they remind you of-

"Anime." You turn to Trash, who's holding the plushie over her head and right under the
kitchen's light. "This shit is anime."

As you glance around even the hornmother is looking at hers, as the What bits its own and
slams it up and down.

And you grimace.

"I love them!" It's Roomba, positively beaming. "Awwww, that's so sweet of her... I
wonder if we can give them out with business cards..."

"Such big eyes, though..." It's Preah's void voice, "It must see very well."

Trash throws hers somewhere else and points at Preah as she sits down. "They don't get
along, Preah and Vaal. Rivalry or something. Don't ask me, I don't get it either."
>>
>>1061351
"Before Toast? I suppose she might get annoying to someone used to getting a read on people, or someone who thinks the answer to bullying is turning the bully into chunky salsa. The way I see it is that if someone's actions are seemingly inscrutable then the best course of action is to assume there is no reasoning behind them until evidence shows otherwise... At least as long as not knowing carries little risk. I'm not a fan of Occam's razor but sometimes the time and frustration it saves is worth it.

Anyways, as long as I manage to build a fridge to keep Butter here from melting then she's got my support. An Arma is nice, an Arma with discipline is good, and an Arma with discipline that manages to both annoy and comfort Toast is great.

I still like RoomBux better, but if you're looking for a soft and doe-eyed image over a rescue service the anime Roombas are more fitting. My question is how long has she been planning this for? Did she hire a bunch of fakes to sew these up 24/7 since they first met?"
>>
"Before Toast?" You wonder.

"Yeah, not your sister's fault." Trash tilts her head at Preah. "She'll deny it to seem mature
till people start killing Armas to get high before starving."

Preah opens her mouth, then closes. Her gaze, as usual, remains neutral. Then she opens it
again. "I disagree with your Blanca on a few things. That's all. No need to call Marco
Antonio."

Trash glances at Roomba."That means, 'don't make a Brazilian drama out of it.'" Then
shivers. "If that's how you wanna do it, fine, but I'll be calling bullshit."

"Ok." Preah grins at her.

"I suppose she might get annoying to someone used to getting a read on people," you say,
looking at Roomba's disproportionate plushie, "or someone who thinks the answer to bullying
is turning the bully into chunky salsa. The way I see it is that if someone's actions are
seemingly inscrutable then the best course of action is to assume there is no reasoning
behind them until evidence shows otherwise. At least as long as not knowing carries little risk.
I'm not a fan of Occam's razor but sometimes the time and frustration it saves are worth it."

"Occam... razor?" Roomba blinks.

"I swear to fuck I've heard that before." Trash scratches her head, then frowns her eyes."Aw
fuck you Nielly, don't make me read books."

"But Nielly, sometimes they aren't good at that. At showing evidence." Roomba says, giving
you a worried look in the eyes. "Sometimes people have this little-broken switch and all you
have to do is press it. I don't know how to put it," she looks away, "but before doing
something like that it's nice to have a good look inside. Maybe we can fix them. And they could
make other people happy."

"And if we can't, well, you have your RIGI." Trash simply says, making Roomba whimper
just a little. "I agree with Nielly. We've got a big ship and all, and yet not enough to risk for
every single fuck we are going to meet."

"Anyways," you start, "as long as I manage to build a fridge to keep Butter here from melting
then she's got my support." Preah smiles at you. It's not a warm smile. "An Arma is nice, an
Arma with discipline is good, and an Arma with discipline that manages to both annoy and
comfort Toast is great."

"That's not great," the living plushie points out, "that's not great at fucking all."

"Oooooooooh, look at her go with that mouth of hers!" Preah hugs Roomba further, the Fake
simply resigning to her frozen prison. She looks at you, then, "If you are going to do one, then
do it so I can use it everyday. It feels very good."

Trash is scratching her cheek, but she stops as you glance.

So you look back at the toaster. "I still like RoomBux better, but if you're looking for a soft
and doe-eyed image over a rescue service the anima Roombas are more fitting." She opens
her mouth, so you quickly raise a finger. It works. "My question is how long as she been
planning this for? Did she hire a bunch of Fakes to sew these up 24/7 since they first met?"

(Cont!)
>>
"Grab your seats tight and get ready to shit your engines," Trash rumbles, "because all of these
are hand-fucking-MADE."

The silence settles. Instead of shitting their engines, everybody took to look at their
plushies. Even you. Roomba takes Preah's from her hand.

"Well, these are a little different." There's surprise in her voice. She looks at Trash. "Still,
hand-made...?"

"AO-made, what do you think?" Trash shrugs. "Corny's not very smart, but when she turns something into muscle memory she really goes
out of the road. It's fucking scary, and yet there you have it." Trash states, firmly. "Also don't
tell her I said she's not smart unless you want me to get raped. Butter, I'm looking at you."

"Oooooooh, what happened to 'Nogog'?" Preah does a silent giggle.

"I like this one better, so butter."

"As for the RoomBux," Roomba says, studying now two plushies, "I'm not looking to charge for
this service. I want people to feel we are investing in them, not in money." She, then,
raises an open palm, before anyone says a word. "I know economy is a thing, but the
whole point of this is having them want to invest in us. It was what the broken horn
Leader wanted to try."
>>
>>1060559
Haremhorn described it once as a group of people playing a one player RPG game. Everyone can call out suggestions, but the only person who decides is the one with the controller.

Nyandemo has the controller, since I got Broken Horn Leader killed in the previous quest.

All of it is here

http://suptg.thisisnotatrueending.com/qstarchive.html?tags=Himehorn911

>>1061231
I'm enjoying it, even though I don't always catch it when its live.
>>
>>1062268
Steve, who's best girl for you?
>>
>>1062292
Much like Girls und Panzer, every girl is best girl.
>>
>>1062310
Oh, even Leateli? nananana

All I can ask then is, who is /better/ girl for you?
>>
>>1062333
Leateli is the Erika of this quest.

Best for me? Hard to decide. Too hard to decide.
>>
>>1061817
"You may say it's not great, but that interview was more for my sake than yours wasn't it?

Anyways maybe you could jump in the fridge after Butter has firmed up enough and it's warmed up enough that you won't become a Toast-popsicle. Your coolant has a low freezing point, but not -194 Celsius low.

If Vaal is that good at multitasking then she's a fuck of a lot more useful than I thought. At least to me. With enough skill you can make up for a lack of large machinery with volume of production, I figured i'd just recharge in downtime while doing it all myself, but if I could teach her to run some little assembly lines for me I could do some interesting things quickly.
>>
You spawn an evil giggle. "You may say it's not great, but that interview was more for my sake
than yours wasn't it?"

Roomba puffs the left cheek. "I care about your thoughts, but that doesn't mean I'll take your
every word. Besides, you've been such a crunchy potato so far..." she shakes her head.
"The Support Center will act for free, but it will be open for donations."

"Wouldn't it be easier to just, you know," Trash gestures, "charge them?"

And Roomba shakes her head, again. "It has to be their choice." You shake the head on your
plushie.

"I see." Trash nods. "Well what the hell, we can always raid or something."

"Anyways, maybe you could jump in the fridge after Butter has firmed up enough and it's
warmed up enough that you won't become a Toast-popsicle." You save Trash from the
backlash, turning Roomba's odd orange eyes to you. "Your coolant has a low freezing point, but
not -194 Celsius low."

Your boss looks away for a while; then nods in affirmation. "That sounds kinda nice."

"Oooooh, but I'll be lonely in there," you hear Preah say. "That is very cruel of you."

Roomba looks behind her. "Oh, so you go in groups then? Well, that makes sense I guess."

"We go alone." Preah looks straight at her, blank as usual. "It's not a wide container, there
is only room for one."

Roomba nods. "I see."

You realize there's a What on your head. Without looking, you grab the body and leave it
on the floor, but it climbs back on. You sigh. "If Vaal is that good at multitasking then she's a
fuck a lot more useful than I thought. At least to me." This draws their eyes back on you. "With
enough skill you can make up for a lack of large machinery with volume production. I figured I'd
just recharge in downtime while doing it all myself, but If I could teach her to run some little
assembly lines for me I could do some interesting things quickly."

"Good luck with that." It's Trash, suddenly yawning. It takes a while for it to and, and it
makes the hornmother yawn as well. "Corny is the worst learner ever, it takes her like five
times longer than anyone I know. That's her tradeoff," Trash raises a finger, "it takes her
years to get the hang of something. Once she does, though, you get to see this crazy kind of
shit." She shakes the plushie, that suddenly has a black eyepatch, a scar on the cheek, and
a little fork with ketchup across its plain hand. "So if she ever stops sinking hovercrafts, get
ready for some serious acrobatics bullshit."

"No poker?" It's the hornmother, her talking so unusual that makes her the new center of
attention. And she doesn't seem to care.

Roomba does the Roomba at her. "I'll play with the Inked Knight when it comes... after all, we
can't talk to her through the cellphone." Then she sighs, her eyes still closed. "Playing with
Preah doesn't make any sense, she'll just do random moves and win or lose because I can't
read her and she can't read anyone."

"Oooooooooooooh." Preah adds.

"Ooooooooooooh!" Roomba pouts.
>>
>>1064279
"You see, that's what I was talking about with Occam's razor. You could melt your vote trying to think of what sort of bluffs or tells Butter has, or you could just let it go and just treat her like she's playing completely at random. Sure you might just be able to find something but it's it really worth the trouble? I'm sure you find trying to cure people of their pessimism and such is worth the effort... But there clearly is a point where you give up. I think Blankey hadn't given up yet and that's why her and Butter don't get along.

As for donations... I'm going to stockpile batteries and I'm not sharing. I want to be awake the moment you give up so I can say 'I told you so' in person. That's me being a crunchy potato. Being a pragmatic pessimist in order to keep your idealistic optimism from getting scrapped is my job, think of it as raining on your parade to water your melon vines if you like."
>>
"You see, that's what I was talking about with Occam's razor. You could melt your vote trying
to think of what sort of bluffs or tells Butter has, or you could just let it go and just treat her like
she's playing completely at random." Well, well, it seems Toast's letting you talk all the way
through this time. Or at least that's what her orange eyes tell you. "Sure you might just be
able to find something but it's it really worth the trouble? I'm sure you find trying to cure people
of their pessimism and such is worth the effort... But there clearly is a point where you
give up." There it is; Trash's subtle pout of approval, if you can call it that. "I think Blankey
hadn't given up yet and that's why her and Butter don't get along."

You all at least glance at the hornmother. Ser open palms hover near Roomba's head, as the
Fake's gaze is fixed on you. And you can guess why. The toaster must be melting her
cores right now.

There's that one little gift you don't want to punch the Sansui's for, that now makes you
smile just a bit: you know all about her.

"Then I'll just have to try harder." She finally smiles at you. "Everyone we give up on is a
friend I could have had." Roomba's eyes dim as she tilts her head- and this time she looks darn
fucking cute even to you. "I can't read Preah because she doesn't care about the game, she
doesn't mind whether she wins or loses at poker. Even when we actually bet." Roomba
closes her eyes. "But down there, I know they do. I know they care."

You wait for someone to add up to her little speech; it doesn't happen.

After a while, Trash chuckles. "What makes you think the Inked Knight is a 'her'? Like, that
got me thinking, can you even fuck the thing?"

"You seem eager to know," Preah adds to the conversation, almost politely.

"Come on, those things have to come from somewhere." Trash rest a heel over a knee,
closing her eyes in the motion. "One day we got Ubers, the next day Whats, the day after that
we got the Inkeds..." She leans back. "Then, we got Vaal. Where the fuck do they come
from, what are we going to see tomorrow?"

"I was, um, thinking of someone else when I said that." Roomba giggles. "It's a secret,
though."

"It's my girlfriend and you want to fuck her. Big deal." Roomba opens her mouth too late. "Also,
hear the fucking Nielly. She's got a point, and I got another; every time you trust someone, you
risk everyone else." Roomba goes blank. "Write that on your forehead, Toasty.."

(Cont!)
>>
"Also," Trash goes on, this time looking at you, "I think you meant that Corny gave up and
Butter didn't. Because Vaal either fucks you or kills you," the templar shakes her head, "she
doesn't try."

"As for donations..." You draw the attention, "I'm going to stockpile batteries and I'm not
sharing." You expect a pout from Roomba, but instead, you get a quizzical stare. "I want to be
awake the moment you give up so I can say 'I told you so' in person." And yet this time you
don't fail. "That's me being a crunchy potato." You smile widely. "Being a pragmatic pessimist
in order to keep your idealistic optimism from getting scrapped is my job, think of it as raining
on your parade to water your melon vines if you like."

"What I think, is that you will fuel that Arma thing for cold with your attitude." Roomba pouts
furthers. "And it's going to work."

"Oh, I hope so." Preah smiles to nowhere in particular. She then princess-grabs Roomba
and stands, only to leave the Fake standing at once... well, now that's a height difference. "I
should get going. An old friend of mine is coming tonight."

"Can you tell him to wait?" Preah turns to Trash, then tilts her head to the side.
Meanwhile, the templar gives a shark grin. "Corny's coming soon... and as far as I know,
neither of these have ever seen a good fight." She straightens herself, satisfied. "And, they'll
be running a Support Center!"

Preah pauses; then grins. "Ooooooooh, that could be interesting."

"Oh, but, I was thinking about calling the Inked Knight while doing the interview with Bravado,"
it seems toasters can speak, sometimes. "It would save a lot of time, and we can't know
when Vaal is coming back." And maybe, just maybe, they can get nervous.

After looking at each other longly, they both turn to you.
>>
>>1065197
Give Toast a pat "Speak with confidence Toast, at least as long as you're not running on a complete ass-pull of an idea. As long as you can get a hold of them one way or anther that sounds like a plan.

Where you talking about us having never seen a good fight Beans? You're right, I haven't. Only a half dozen flip-flop-fu wielding nerds trying their hardest to fight me, which ultimately wasn't very hard at all. Too many martial arts modules in me and too many badly dubbed kung-fu movies in them. I can't speak for Toast though, could go either way in my mind.

Or did you mean something else?"



Delete Post: [File Only] Style:
[Disable Mobile View / Use Desktop Site]

[Enable Mobile View / Use Mobile Site]

All trademarks and copyrights on this page are owned by their respective parties. Images uploaded are the responsibility of the Poster. Comments are owned by the Poster.