>>2473123
>>Wish I'm back at home shitposting on 6chan
GOD I miss my corp-issued dataslate

>>2473123
>Wish I'm back at home shitposting on 6chan
>Think of Widowmaker-sama's glorious rear
In that order

>>2473123
>Think of Widowmaker-sama's glorious rear
This promises to be entertaining

>>2473127
>>2473128
+1

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>>2473127
>>2473128
>>2473129
>>2473131
Agreed

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>>2473127
>>2473128
>>2473129
>>2473131
>>2473135

>This truck sucks
>This job sucks
>I wish I'm back home shitposting on 6chan in my basement.
>Tfw no more late night tendies
>I bet /o/ will shit on this truck's design
>Try to distract myself with Widowmaker-sama's glorious rear
>Wish she would tie me up and call me mean things
>Shit now I have a boner
>Now my back, balls AND my dick hurts
>Truck stopped abruptly
>Probably midnight by the time we managed to squeeze ourselves out of that shitty truck
>The mansion's large ass door is already open
>i'vegotabadfeelingaboutthis.dataslate
>We move in, guns pointed into the dark mansion anyway
>Suddenly a Brit qt3.14 takes down one of my fellow operative in a blink of an eye
>"Cheers love!"
>Boner comes back
>I tripped myself because meeting girls trigger my autism
>Spaghetti spills out of my tactical pouch

Shit what do

>Try to autistically start a conversation with the Brit QT

>Run away deeper into the mansion because I'm a fucking pussy

>Use this as a tactical distraction and shoot her

>Come on disembodied shitposting voices in my mind, give me something

>>2473162
>>Use this as a tactical distraction and shoot her
>Try to autistically start a conversation with the Brit QT
Why not both?

>>2473165
Supporting.
Also adopt the fakest brit accent you can muster.

>>2473165
>>2473169
support.

>>2473165
Supporting, also:
>”Pip Pip Cheerio dearie!”

>>2473174
Try and throw in a mornin' Guv'nor.

>>2473169
+1

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>>2473165
>>2473169
>>2473171
>>2473174
>>2473179
>>2473180

>Never met a girl who would get in a 20 meter radius around me
>spaghettispillingintensify.deepnet
>Try to strike up a conversation as I fire my rifle aimlessly due to my incapability of confronting someone of the opposite gender
>Try to charm her with a made up British accent
>Ends up sounding like a stuttering David Mitchell
>"M-mornin' Guv'nor. P-pip c-cherioo!"
>She rolls on the ground laughing but none of your bullets hit because your anxiety completely destroys your recoil control.
>Pretty sure you killed one of the operatives
>Run deeper into the mansion in shame as more and more of my comrade got taken down by the Brit QT
>A hand grabbed me from the dark and covered my mouth
>"Don't make a sound if you want to lighve..."
>Something soft is on my back
>Quickly recognize the voice as Widowmaker-sama's
>Boner returns

Tonight is one rollercoaster of emotions...

>"Y-you too..."

>Follow WM-sama's advice

>Fuck this I'm gonna book out of this place

>>2473216

>Follow WM-sama's advice

>>2473216
>Follow WM-sama's advice
Lets be a good autist and not sperg out just yet

>>2473216
>Follow WM-sama's advice
The boner demands it

>>2473216
>Follow WM-sama's advice
Want to hear more of her voice, Its ASMR

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>>2473224
>>2473225
>>2473237
>>2473238

>Yeah why not
>See no reason to go against my waifu superior
>She told me to stick to the sidelines and cover her
>We stealthily move back to the entrance of the mansion as I tuck back my spaghetti into my tactical puch
>All hell break loose
>More operatives and an edgelord fighting with against the Brit QT, a gorrila, a manlet and a pink mech
>The operatives who just arrived have better equipments, combat armors, and they look chad as fuck
>Still taken down like mooks albeit not as fast as us
>Edgelord is busy spouting his favourite parts of his black metal songs while shooting the manlet and armored gorilla
>Pink mech sprays and prays, forcing the operatives that outnumbers it to find cover
>justlikemyjapaneseanime.soundfile
>Widowmaker-sama crouches and starts taking aim on the Brit QT

What do, what do...

>Admire this fine piece of art in front of me

>Actually do my fucking job for once

>The option of booking it is still present

>>2473270
>>Admire this fine piece of art in front of me

>>2473270
>>Admire this fine piece of art in front of me

>>2473270
>Actually do my fucking job for once

>>2473270
>Actually do my fucking job for once
She did say to do anything but follow her and watch...her

>>2473270
>Actually do my fucking job for once

>>2473270
>Admire this fine piece of art in front of me
Shouldn't have hired an autist who is easily distracted...

>>2473270
>Actually do my fucking job for once

>>2473270
>>Actually do my fucking job for once
Keep an eye out to knock WM out the way if the QT flanks and goes for us

>>2473270
>Actually do my fucking job for once

>>2473270
>Actually do my fucking job for once
Gotta do our job sometimes

>>2473280
Wow I meant to vote Admire but doesn't matter right now....

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>>2473280
>>2473277
>>2473283
>>2473295
>>2473297


>Maybe just one glance....
>Just a 2 second stare....
>No
>Not gonna ruin this job
>Not this time
>Its either this or I have to go back to college
>Fuck that
>Start firing my rifle and shouting autistic battlecry
>Actually feel great
>Until i found out that I just actively sabotaged WM's effort in sniping the Brit QT and revealed our position
>MFW
>Widowmaker-sama and Brit QT start having close combat
>ahintofyuri.jpg
>Hide in the shadows yet again in shame
>Comms start to ring
>Somehow I realized this one even though I managed to ignore the dying breaths of my comrades
>A dude named Vialli wants us to off Widowmaker-sama and the edgelord
>Says there'll be loads of dosh in it if we succeed

Money equals to tendies and off time on my shitposting station. A tempting proposition....

>Can't be that hard right? Some misfire here and there....

>Attacking Widowmaker-sama? HERESY!

>Seriously I gotta get out of here before I get killed.

>>2473307
>>Attacking Widowmaker-sama? HERESY!
That ass is divine, it must be protected

>>2473307
>Attacking Widowmaker-sama? HERESY!
Try too come across as cool and warn her someone is trying to bribe the agents to turn on the edge duo, fail and sound like a white knighting bitch

>>2473307
>Attacking Widowmaker-sama? HERESY!

>>2473307
>Seriously I gotta get out of here before I get killed.

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>>2473309
>>2473313
>>2473318

>Yeah what was I thinking
>I'm a man of integrity
>I'm above sacrificing my waifu for something as shallow as money
>Tell this Vialli dude that I'm gonna rat him out on Widowmaker-sama
>Vialli dude orders the others to kill me
>They couldn't because we all look alike
>justaccordingtokeikaku.credit
>Widowmaker-sama and the Brit QT is still having their little yuri sexual tension session
>So that leaves me with Edgeman who still doesn't realise that the other operatives are aiming for his back

:thonk:

>Warn the 11 year old's OC Donut Steel

>Try to get between the yuri action

>Shoot the operatives yourself

>NINGERUNDAYOOOOO

>>2473398
>NINGERUNDAYOOOOO
I haven't the foggiest what this means, so I'll vote for it.

>>2473398
We will make Rambo proud.

And then probably die by Reapers hands for perceived treason.

>>2473401
Aaand I forgot to actaully vote.
>>2473398
>Shoot the operatives yourself

>>2473398
>Warn the 11 year old's OC Donut Steel
>Try to get between the yuri action

Why not both?

>>2473398
>Try to get between the yuri action

>>2473398
>Shoot the operatives yourself

>>2473398
>Warn the 11 year old's OC Donut Steel
>Try to get between the yuri action

>>2473398
>Shoot the operatives yourself

>>2473398
>>Warn the 11 year old's OC Donut Steel
>Get singled out as the operative the others want to kill

>>Try to get between the yuri action
>Stand between two lethal combatants: 86% chance of death; 10% chance of injury; 4% chance of accidental touching.
Still tempting...

>>Shoot the operatives yourself
>Become a target for every-damn-one and probably help nobody

>>NINGERUNDAYOOOOO
>???????????¿???????!

This is a tough vote.

>>2473398
>>Warn the 11 year old's OC Donut Steel

>>2473398
>NINGERUNDAYOOOOO
Obviously the only choice.

>>2473398
You're guilty with a charge of murder of sides, Red.
>Shoot... someone, or something.
It's not like they gave us aim training at the facility.

>>2473398
>>NINGERUNDAYOOOOO
???

>>2473398
>>NINGERUNDAYOOOOO

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>>2473398
>NINGERUNDAYOOOOO

>End up running away from the clusterfuck
>We're found by an old ass soldier dude who teaches us all he knows.
>pic related
>use our now competent mercenary skills to get LODS OF EMONE
>And then we use our fight money to buy two of every animal on earth
>and then we heard them onto a boat
>and then we beat the crap out of every single one
>boom Widowmaker-sama respects us and is ovulating RIGHT NOW

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>>2473400
>>2477110
>>2477600
>>2477613
>>2478848

>Thats it
>The pressure is killing me
>My anxiety is gut punching me with every passing second
>I'm almost puking
>I didn't sign up for this
>Actually I might have in the contract but still
>I'm gonna book it
>Forgive me Widowmaker-sama, for I have sinned
>Ran for the entrance as fast as I can while shouting
>The other operatives are in my way
>In a burst of adrenaline I sprayed my assault rifle at them and mauled the butt of it on any that still stands
>Reach the exit, almost crying by now
>A single man stands in my way
>My rifle is out of bullets
>He stands menacingly, his back facing the moon, shadowing his facial feature

N-NANI?!

>Re as loudly as I can to intimidate him

>Charge at him. I survived up to this point, one man couldnt possibly stop me now

>Look at him in distress as menacing sound effects start appearing in the corner of my eyes

>>2480166
>Look at him in distress as menacing sound effects start appearing in the corner of my eyes

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>>2480166
>>Look at him in distress as menacing sound effects start appearing in the corner of my eyes

[MENACING]

>>2480166
>Look at him in distress as menacing sound effects start appearing in the corner of my eyes

>>2480166
>>Look at him in distress as menacing sound effects start appearing in the corner of my eyes

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>>2480169
>>2480190
>>2480200

>Guy just stood there and look at me
>At least I THINK he's looking at me
>MENACINGLY
>A hint of a mocking smile can be seen
>Motherfucker...
>I scramble for a magazine to reload my rifle
>He whips out a what seemed to be a power blade and an energy shield
>Burst of adrenaline gone
>Now what keeps me going is the choking sense of mortality
>He motions his hand, welcoming me for the first strike

The moment of truth is at hand. Live or die, it will all be decided now.

>Finish reloading and engage in ranged combat. Distance is my only advantage right now.

>Throw the rifle at his face and remember the basics of CQC as I engage him.

>Call me a coward, but I intend to leave this place alive. I've been running away my whole life. Works for me then, will work for me now.

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>>2480230
>>2480230
>>Throw the rifle at his face and remember the basics of CQC as I engage him.

>>2480230
>>Throw the rifle at his face and remember the basics of CQC as I engage him.

>>2480230
>Throw the rifle at his face and remember the basics of CQC as I engage him.

Use his shield as a platform, jump on it all cool as fuck and land behind him, snag his sword arm and FUCK HIM UP WITH HIS OWN ENERGY BLADE

COMMENCE VIRTUOUS MOOKSION

>>2480239
Supporting.

Rolled 62 (1d100)

>>2480233
>>2480236
>>2480239
>>2480244

Op here, rolling on mobile
Will updoot in 2 hours or so since i have class. Stay tuned

>>2480239
Remember to steal his energy blade and combine it with the rifle afterwards!

>>2480250

>I circled around him for a few second
>Try to not break eye contact
>He spins around keeping track of me, revealing a portion of his face
>Smugly looking at me
>We'll see how smug you are when I smash your face in
>Feigning a retreat as my back now face the courtyard of the mansion
>He followed
>Immediately turn and throw my rifle at his face
>As he is distracted, I move in for hand to hand combat
>A quick one two to his face, stunning him
>Followed by an elbow
>Tried to disarm him but his grip is too tight
>Exhaustion creeping upon my body as this guy manage to push me off balance
>Fucker sits on me, about to stab his sword into my face
>I managed to hold back his hands as the blade almost reaches my skin through my helmet
>I can feel the flare of the blade blinding my left eye
>I scream in pain as I pull my head back, the blade sears across my face downwards
>Kicked the guy off me and charged at him while he's down
>Sharp pain on my side as I fell to the side
>My body shivering and near unresponsive
>I put my hand on the side of my waist
>Blood
>Fucking blood
>oh my gOD OH MY GODOHMYGOD
>Vision blurring as I try to stay awake
>Feel my body lifted and floating away

"...eeker you alright?", I heard from the edge of my consciousness, most probably belonging to the British girl.

"Yea....'m ...ine."

"See...e's...ing a...y!"

So this is the end....

> []Please god no!

> []My only regret is I abandoned Widowmaker when time is at it's most dire.

> []Can't say it's the worst ending there is....

>>2480304
>> [X]My only regret is I abandoned Widowmaker when time is at it's most dire.

We should have defended that ass to the very end ...

>>2480304
>Can't say it's the worst ending there is....

>>2480304
>> []My only regret is I abandoned Widowmaker when time is at it's most dire.

>>2480304
>> []My only regret is I abandoned Widowmaker when time is at it's most dire.
>>2480306
Our one regret is not defending that ass.

>>2480304
>This..this is not the end..
>SEIG TALON
>Pull out our standard issue grenade and explode everything

>>2480304
Motherfucker
I should have expected that
>Fuck, this sucks... no more /comfytimes/...
>And I betrayed Widowmaker-sama too
>Not worth it

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>>2480306
>>2480309
>>2480310
>>2480318

>Shouldn't have...ran away
>...failed her like the coward I am
>A failure right to the end
>The light approaches
>Feel like I'm floating away...
>A heavy thud was felt on my back, then darkness...
--------

"Hey wake up sonny!"

>"BWAH!"
>Rise up, sleeping on a bed half naked
>An old man is sitting on a chair at the side of the bed

"They done quite a number on you boy, a wonder that you're not dead before I got you out of there. Talk about a deus ex machina am I right?"

Wow, last time I found myself in a near death situation and now I'm safe and sound in an old man's house, what an asspull OP. Now what kind of question a sane and logical person would ask in this kind of situation?

> []Am I dead?

> []Who are you?

> []Is Widowmaker-sam-... Is Miss Widowmaker safe?

> []Write in

>>2480320
>Now what kind of question a sane and logical person would ask in this kind of situation?
>> []Is Widowmaker-sam-... Is Miss Widowmaker safe?
What sort of character do you think we are?

>>2480320
>Am I dead?

>>2480320
>> [X]Write in

Who was that cunt who stabbed me

>>2480320
>> []Who are you?
>> []Is Widowmaker-sam-... Is Miss Widowmaker safe?

>>2480320
> [X]Is Widowmaker-sam-... Is Miss Widowmaker safe?

>>2480322
>>2480333
>>2480334

(Gonna depart from greentexting since it get tedious by now.)

"Is Widowmaker-sam-... Is Miss Widowmaker safe?", I ask as I wildly scan the room.

"Hahahah! First thing in a Talon operative's mind after being beaten half dead and saved by an unknown individual is a woman? Don't worry about her boy. Her chances of getting out of there surpasses yours of not getting completely turned to ashes, and you're fine and alive right now aren't you?"

"Now get up and go downstairs for breakfast. And wear those clothes I readied for you over there."

After pointing towards said clothes, he walked out of the room, his footsteps slowly disappearing below. My body aches all over as I stood up. I cannot see through my left eye as there is a bandage covering it. With a single touch, a vertical scar can be felt from above my left eye and downward across my face.

The attire provided by the old man itself wasn't too bad. A brown khaki pants and white long sleeve shirt now covers my abused body. Going down the stairs just outside of the room, I am greeted with the smell of fried bacon and eggs accompanied by the aroma of hot coffee.

"Sit down and get yourself cozy. Not everyday I have the chance to eat breakfast with a member of one of the most notorious terrorist group in history."

Gladly, I took him up on his offer. As I reached for the cutlery readied beside my breakfast, the old man in a blink of an eye stretched over the table and pushed my hand down, pinning it on the table. Only then I realized how big this old man really is. Despite his age, he is easily taller than me and boast a rather large and muscled physique.

"But first.... let's begin with an introduction. Your name, and perhaps lay out some of your story on how you got caught up in all of that mess back there."

A smile was gives to me as he said all of that, but the pressure he emits are enough to make me choke on my own saliva.


>[] "My name is..."

>[] "Where do I begin..."

>[] "No you-.... first"

>>2480352
Besides the name option are the others semi write-ins? As in, are we supposed to make up a back story or specifically ask him what we want to know?

>>2480352
>[] "My name is..."
Slim Shady

>>2480372
AKA Marshall Mathers, other mooks call me E.

>>2480356
Guess I was unclear on that part. The first choice was just to disclose the name. I already decided on the name myself but if you insist on a write in and other anons like it then go on. 2nd choice is to disclose both the MC's name and backstory (text wall incoming). Same case with 1st choice. 3rd is asking the old man to tell the MC his name first.

>>2480375
Mumble about stuff about our life, like an autist that has no idea how to hold a conversation before realizing he only wanted our name then apologize and tell them our name real quietly while looking down. Then clear throat and say our name properly like we did at our talon job interview, but nervously.

Lets see what name you gave the MC

>>2480372
this

>>2480385
I changed my vote to this here.
>>2480380
But its still basically
>[] "My name is..."

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>>2480372
>>2480373
>>2480385
>>2480386

"My name is Slim Shady.", I said.

The old man gave me the look. The "seriously?" look. The same kind of look my parents gave me every time I try to explain to them that anime is not for kids.

"A.K.A Marshall Mathers..."

5 second of staring and the old man finally spoke up.

"Well I'll be damned you're actually serious."

"....the other operatives called me E for-"

"Yea, yea I get it kiddo.", the old man said, lifting his arm from my hand. Damn I can barely feel it anymore!

"Well you're in my debt for saving your sorry ass but it's a bit uncalled for for me to pounce on you like that so I guess my introduction is due next huh?"

I nod as I shove 3 bacons into my mouth at once.

"Well kid, my name is Dario Avenicci, one of the best operatives in Talon some many years ago. 8 maybe? I don't remember."

"Well are you still working for Talon now?", I asked as I chowed down the last of my meal.

"Of course not kid. I'm too old for that and I want to die on my own bed. Besides, Talon ain't what it used to be."


>[] "Well you could help Talon rise back up. Surely you stayed with Talon back then because it once stood for something?"

>[] "Surely you still have contacts within Talon sincee you know who Widowmaker is and what happened at the mansion. Can't you at least help me get back to Talon?"

>[] "Good for you, was planning on ditching that shitty organisation myself."

>>2480408
>[] "Surely you still have contacts within Talon since you know who Widowmaker is and what happened at the mansion. Can't you at least help me get back to Talon?"

>>2480408
>Well you could help Talon rise back up. Surely you stayed with Talon back then because it once stood for something?
of course, we have to stutter

>>2480408
What? Why'd we go with the name? I wanted to see what the OP had thought up of.

Say this first
>[] "Surely you still have contacts within Talon sincee you know who Widowmaker is and what happened at the mansion. Can't you at least help me get back to Talon?"
Then
>[] "Well you could help Talon rise back up. Surely you stayed with Talon back then because it once stood for something?"

>>2480408
>>[] "Well you could help Talon rise back up. Surely you stayed with Talon back then because it once stood for something?"

(>>2480416 peer pressure that's why)


>>2480411
>>2480412
>>2480416
>>2480417

"Surely you still have contacts within Talon since you know who Widowmaker is and what happened at the mansion. Can't you at least help me get back to Talon?", I asked him.

After a deep sigh he answered my request.

"Look kiddo, the moment I call any of them, they would sooner ask me to join back "like the good old days". I'm retired now. I don't want any more fighting, I don't want to waste anymore days I have on this god forsaken Earth on a lost cause!"

His calm voice finally rose up to a near shout before he cooled himself down. A deep breath was taken and he turned himself to his coffee and some morning news.

"I know the reason you want to go back to Talon in to chase that Widowmaker lady back. Why are you this dedicated now when you would rather save your own skin back then?"

I want to give a witty answer back at his face but the only come back I could think of is a pitiful "No u". I then decide that it is best to dodge that question altogether and press him on contacting Talon for me even further.

"Come on Mr. Dario, you could help Talon rise back up. S-surely you stayed with Talon back then b-because it once stood for something....? "

I start to stutter in my speech as Mr. Dario's glare intensifies. Perhaps pressing on this matter is not a good idea. Before he could break his mug of coffee under the sheer strength of his grip however, the doorbell rang. Mr. Dario goes to check while i followed him since I got nothing better to do.

Two men in black showed up at the doorstep. They requested to talk to Mr. Dario.

"Dario Avenicci I presume?" One of the men ask.

"Yes that's me.", Mr. Dario answered warily.

"We have come to escort you to our boss. He would like to speak with you."

"Yeah I would like to decline. Tell your boss I'm not interested in whatever he's offering." Dario slowly shuts his door close.

Both of them slid their grip on the door. Despite their gangly physique, they are able to rip the door open and outmuscle Dario, pushing him down on his back. These two individual revealed their augmented limbs, perhaps in attempt to intimidate Mr. Dario.

>[] Charge at the two augmented men

>[] Help Mr. Dario up

>[] Stay and watch

>[] Try to find other routes of escape in this house

>>2480473
>[] Help Mr. Dario up
Hey is for horses, why they gotta be so rough hes not a bad guy..... ermm in the non terror organization way or something... quit being jerks ur hurting him!

>>2480483
Or...... Grab a frying pan and bash em both over the head really hard.

>>2480486
this, I love when people use frying pans as weapons

>>2480473
>[] Charge at the two augmented men
Get em with a pan

>>2480500
How about two pans?

>>2480512
now you have two pan, pan win every time

>>2480519
Awesome. LETS DO IT!

>>2480500
>[] Charge at the two augmented men
Lets hope this pans out

>>2480627
I'd like to introduce you to Mr. Hook and Peter Pan!

Rolled 7 (1d20)

(Wew lad last night I was pretty sleepy so forgive me for the unshitposty and serious update. The usual schedule will be resumed today. Also I keep on switching I with You)

>>2480486
>>2480496
>>2480500
>>2480512
>>2480519
>>2480627

Rolling to maximize meme value

Rolled 16 (1d20)

>>2482048
come on, us mooks gotta stand together

Rolled 14 (1d20)

>>2482048
are we rolling?

>>2482048

I don't know how long I've been knocked out when I wake up. All I know is my head hurts like a motherfucker, and there is a note left on me. Okay.... let's recall.

>Rushed to the kitchen to grab frying pan as weapon
>Pretty sure Mr. Dario can handle himself for a minute or two
>Found the pan amongst the unwashed dishes
>But what is better than a frying pan?
>TWO frying pan!
>A minute of effortless search leads me to the conclusion that this man does not own more than one frying pan
>Settled for one
>Got back to the doorway seeing Mr. Dario being pulled outside by one of the two augmented individuals
>Charged to his rescue shouting autistically
>Trip halfway through
>It is actually a tactical distraction so I can land a decisive hit on one of the augmenteds
>Frying pan!
>clang.wav
>Pretty sure I got my face smashed to the wall repeatedly after that

Well that was embarrassing. As for the note left on me, its from Dario telling me that my Talon equipments are left upstairs with the comms fixed. He said that I can stay here as long as I want until either the food ran out or I get bored. Wait a minute where the hell is this house even is? Seems like its in some sort of neighbourhood from what I saw through the door before I got my shit kicked in.

What even is my goal right now?

>[] To return to Widowmaker-sama of course!

>[] To get back to Talon and take revenge on that guy who nearly killed me

>[] In hindsight perhaps cutting off my ties with Talon and restart my life is the best idea

And what should I do now?

>[] Listen on the comms, maybe I can get some valuable info on the current happenings, contact Talon, etc etc...

>[] Pack up my Talon equipments and run off. I'll think of a plan along the way.

>[] Stay put and wait for Mr. Dario to return.

>>2482161
>>2482173
I roll for things while anon votes

For the sake of clarity:

20 - Critical success!

19-15 - Great success!

10-14 - Success!

9-5 - Failure

4-2 - Oh shit boy

1 - What are you even doing?

>>2482194
Kidnap widowmaker san and hide her in the basement till she loves me!

Relax for the rest of the fay while listening in on our radio upstairs.

>>2482194
>[] To get back to Talon and take revenge on that guy who nearly killed me

>[] Listen on the comms, maybe I can get some valuable info on the current happenings, contact Talon, etc etc...

>>2482219
Do this.

>>2482212
Solid plan boi, you got my backing.

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>>2482219
>>2482303

After getting beaten up for 2 days in a row, I guess its time to wise up and actually think of what I want to do now. I can't just stumble around blindly and hope somebody is gonna save my ass every time. Let's start with things that are simple. I'm gonna join Talon and find that motherfucker that almost killed me back at the mansion.

After washing myself and changing the bandage covering my left eye, I walked upstairs to where Dario said my equipment would be. Within a wardrobe in the room I found myself in this morning, the standard issue Talon operative equipment I was given upon me joining Talon was arranged neatly, folded and with my scarred helmet laid on top of it. Wearing it, I prayed that the line had not been cut off on my side. Switching the comms online, a voice can be heard...

"...opérateurs, prêts pour l'opération..."

Stupid anglo speak.

"Hello this is Talon operative #2314, I am currently stranded in France and I do not know where I currently am. I was a survivor of the operation held in some kind of mansion..."

A moment of silence followed by a reply in heavy french accent. It seemed kind of exaggerated though...

"Undeghstood. Voice recognition match. Operative #2314, Michael Mazers, American. We shall extghact you in yough location."

"That was easy, isn't there some sort of penalty for failing a mission? Aren't you gonna assassinate me or leave me for dead?"

"No. Leaving you alone there makes you more of a liability, and ze fact you sughvived zat dizazter ov a mission and made ze effort to contact us means you would be more useful on ze field. Stay in yough location and we shall fetch you."

True to their word, in a few hours, in what seemed to be midnight when I got out of Dario's house, a van stopped by and a few people escorted me into it.... and later drugged me cause now I found myself in a plane once again cramped like sardines with other operatives. The only difference this time I'm trapped with a bunch of french fries.

Sigh

>My back hurts

----

>[] Do not think of Widowmaker-sama's glorious rear

>[] Try not to think about how good it is to be back home shitposting on 6-chan

>[] Open the cockpit why not

>[] Some other shit whatever write in

>>2482212
+1

>>2482460
>[] Do not think of Widowmaker-sama's glorious rear

>>2482460
>[] Try not to think about how good it is to be back home shitposting on 6-chan
>[] Some other shit whatever write in
Hey did anyone else get drugged and wake up here?

>[] Do not think of Widowmaker-sama's glorious rear
>[] Try not to think about how good it is to be back home shitposting on 6-chan
try to make (autistic) conversation with someone else on the plane

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>>2482460
>[] Some other shit whatever write in
Actually think up some solutions to better Talon into a WAY more effective organisation, bettering life for the mooks and get yourself noticed in the process. BECOME THE BEST MOOK IN HISTORY

>PIC RELATED

>>2482563
can we plz be henchman 21 now that would be so cool

>>2482563
Good idea.

>>2482563
That sounds way above our pay grade, but sure. Also, fckin Seeker, gonna have to try and kill him later. Or join him. But preferably kill him.

>>2482460
>[] Try not to think about how good it is to be back home shitposting on 6-chan

>>2482563
Boi we're just here for a quick buck. Not funding another blackwatch

>>2482945
You think too fucking small buddy. FUCK Black Watch, we're taking this shit to the fucking TIPPY TOP, FINDING THE INFINITE STAIRS TO THE ZIGARAT AND CLIMBING THOSE BAD BOYS

I'M TALKING MANNED MOBILE NUCLEAR PLATFORMS THAT MISDIRECT ANY AND ALL ATTEMPTS TO TRACE THEIR LOCATIONS, I'M TALKING RETROVIRUS ATTACKS ON MAJOR CAPITAL CITIES VIA RATS AND PIGEONS, I'M TALKING SIPHONING WHOLE WATER SUPPLIES AND SELLING THEM AT A PROFIT, I'M TALKING SOME SERIOUS NEXT LEVEL SHIT HERE MY MAN.

FUCK TALON, WE'LL MAKE OUR OWN TERRORIST ORGANIZATION WITH BLACKJACK AND HOOKERS!!

>>2484033
Well we will have to see if OP actually lives to tell that tale...

Ok fuck it, OP if you are not back here in 2 hours I am pulling a iraq and kuwait scenario and take on QMing

>>2484458
yo im super lazy yesterday so thats why there is no update. It will come sometime today, probably around 5pm gst+8 so stay tuned

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>>2484754
You have sated the hostile take over for now OP, but keep that promise or else the oilfields will be taken by force

>>2484774

Ease up there Saddam, just gas some Kurds for now

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(Sike! I'm updating now!)

>>2482463
>>2482475
>>2482559
>>2482563
>>2482945

Yep. Learned my lessons. Absolutely NOT gonna think about Widowmaker-sama's glorious rear. That sweet purple as-

Fuck. Now I have a boner. Fucking hell. Alright, that was a dumpster fire. Now, let's try not to think about how good it is to be back home shitposting on /v/, browsing /pol/, questing on /qst/, reading monstergirl thread on /tg/....

Now I'm sad. Sad and surrounded by anglos. Well at least I could strike up a conversation with my new fellow mooks.

"Hey bro, did you get drugged into this mission too? What kind of mission we're on?", I asked to the guy beside me.

"Désolé, je ne parle pas anglais", he answered.

Using my superior intellect over this frenchie however, I try to beat him at his own game.

"Hon, hon, I no speak éspanol."

The guy just looked at me all angry-like and finally settled with ignoring me throughout the flight.

High school all over again baby.

You know what? Fuck social interactions. That is for losers. And chads, And Stacys. Fuck the last two especially. Let's think about how I will achieve my current goal, to kill that motherfucker who almost killed me. Clearly he's some kind of Overwatch agent, seeing as he immediately decided to attack me on sight. Can I even match his combat prowess if I meet him again? I barely survived the last encounter! I need to toughen up, rise up the ranks, get better equipment and more mooks under my command. To that end i must survive increasingly dangerous situation and missions and also gain the trust of my higher ups.

But whoa there! That's a lot of thinking for an autistic mook! Let's focus on not dying for now okay?

The plane finally land. After taking yet another cramped trip, we found ourselves on top of some kind of casino and all of the operatives, including me, received the briefing for the current mission. In anglo speak of course.

"Rappelez-vous les agents, notre mission aujourd'hui est de s'assurer de la mort de Reaper et Widowmaker sur l'ordre de Vialli membre du conseil. Ces deux sont des combattants hautement meurtriers et une cution extrême est conseillée..."

>Whatever, probably some shooty killy mission

>Wait did I just hear "Widowmaker"?

>I've go a baaaaaad feeling about this.

>>2484927
>Wait did I just hear "Widowmaker"?

>>2484927
Whatever

>>2484927
>>Wait did I just hear "Widowmaker"?

>>2484927
>>Wait did I just hear "Widowmaker"?

You had one job OP...

>>2485226
Op here, on mobile. Remember when I said I will update around 5pm gst+8? Yeah im gonna do the next update on that time because of class. Don't worry the current arc is nearing the wrap up. Like always, stay tuned fag.

did i do my trip right?

>>2484940
>>2485022
>>2485224

Wait did I just hear "Widowmaker" along those lines? Fuck, will Widowmaker-sama be involved in this mission too? That would be dope as fuck, if not for the fact that she would be taking a sniping position and I would never see her throughout this mission. Oh well.

Before the person responsible for briefing us could complete his speech, a message was relayed to his comms and his tone turns to that of distress.

"Les cibles avaient apporté leur soutien et les hommes que nous avons postés plus tôt ont été anéantis. Le membre du Conseil Vialli est en grand dangereusement en ce moment! Nous devons bouger avec la plus grande hâte!"

All of the other operatives moved into the casino through the ceiling window of the casino. The gamblers and wealthy who are enjoying the features of this establishment all scatter as black clad armed men zip roped their way into the building.

"Les cibles sont parmi les mécènes de ce casino. Les trouver!"

All of the operatives start to scour the building for something... or somebody seeing as they are rounding up the casino's visitors and checking each one of them. I followed a small squad of 4, excluding me, in checking places like toilets and janitor rooms. These are places that people can hide in so we are looking for someone.

As we are checking the Nth toilet in this building we found a locked stall where there is clearly at least one person standing inside. The guy leading the party knocked on the door, saying something in French I doubt whoever in there understands him, fucking Anglo.

I expect them to not comply but the stall door indeed was opened immediately, by a large negro man who punched the aforementioned Frenchie into the toilet mirror.

"Merde!", the other guy in our little squad said as they ready their weapon.

Out of the stall along with the nig however is a familiar face. Widowmaker-sama! Today in a stunning purple dress complimenting her skin color.

Oh my god, oh my god, I'm so excited! What do?!

>Greet WM-sama and aks her how her day's been.

>On a second thought, run away. This does not look good.

>Widowmaker-sama and a negro together in a stall? h-have I been..... b-blacked?

>>2485417
That's probably fucking Doomfist isn't it...

>Greet WM-sama and aks her how her day's been.

Unless of course you guys feel like our power level should get us killed let's at least tolerate the dude.

>>2485417
>Greet WM-sama and aks her how her day's been.

>>2485417
Fire our noobtube at the nigga, and shout PWNED BITCH! As we score a cheap kill that will make all the other frenchmen rage at us using it.

Rolled 16 (1d20)

>>2485428
>>2485430

Rolling against autism and social anxiety

>>2485439
See, THIS is the sort of autism that will get us killed. Take note everyone, this is prime retardation here.

>>2485446

Cheerfully, I waved my hand and cheerfully greeted Widowmaker-sama my one true waifu

"Hey Miss Widowmaker. It's me, the guy who helped you back at the mansion. Do you remember me, hey?"

My simple act of greeting Widowmaker-sama seem to have confused both parties at once. She looked puzzled, why didn't she remember me?

"Qu'est-ce que vous faites vous fichu fou? Tirez sur la cib- AAAAGH!"

I even helped her fight against the Brit QT. Shouldn't that at least make an impression?

"Merde! Ils sont trop for- GAAAKHHHH!"

Oh yes, I was dressed like all the mook, like every....one....else. Huh. That makes sense.

Oh. Everyone's down already. Let's hope Mr. Black here won't kick my shit in.

"Seems like this one knows you rather closely Miss Lacroix. An acquintance perhaps?" The man of African descent said to Widowmaker.

"Yes... the operative who screwed me over while I'm taking the shot on Tracer. Also the one who mowed down 10 other operatives as he stormed out of the mission area and almost getting killed by Seeker, one of Overwatch's most recent addition. What- How are you even here?", Widowmaker-sama said as she put her hand over her face and shakes her head, no doubt due to my utterly amazing skill in surviving near death encounters.

"Oh you know, I'm just that good that Talon thinks I should be redeployed immediately after recovering from my wounds.", I said with the most smuggiest of smile. I then realized that they can't really smile because I'm wearing a helmet but whatever. Me leaning to the side with my elbow on the toilet sink should be enough to convey my coolness.

"Je ne peux pas le croire....."

"Hahahah! I like you, operative. What's your name?"

"Mathew Mathers, Operative #2314, sir...?"

"Akande Ogundimu, but you shall address me as Doomfist. have you heard that name before?"

"I can recall vaguely of it.", I answered.

"Then the events that will transpire next will refresh your memory. Let's go young man. Widowmaker."

"Sombra, have you finished hack- What?! The surprise? You're the one who brought this guy here?"

"What's the matter Widowmaker-sam- err... Miss Widowmaker?"

"No- it's... nothing."

Taking the weapons of the fallen operatives, we move out of the toilet stealthily. most of the lights outside have been either shut down or dimmed, generating enough darkness for us to sneak around.

What should I do next?

>Follow Widowmaker-sama. Us both can sneak through the other operatives.

>Follow Doomfist. We can both mow our way through.

>Move alone amongst the other operatives. I'll be less of a hindrance and more of an advantage that way.

>>2485467
>>Move alone amongst the other operatives. I'll be less of a hindrance and more of an advantage that way.
We do better being comically inept.

>>2485467
>Follow Doomfist. We can both mow our way through.
He said he was gonna hit refresh on us.

>>2485470
Good point.
>>2485469
Switch to >>2485469.

>>2485471
>Switch to >>2485469
>>2485467
>>Follow Doomfist. We can both mow our way through.

>>2485467
>Follow Doomfist. We can both mow our way through.
Why not. I’m sure that we’ll be able to keep up with the guy who can sort of fly.

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>>2485470
>>2485472

After signalling that me and Doomfist will move together, Widowmaker-sama nods and moved into the shadows alone.

With Doomfist, it's clear that we're not getting out of this all sneaky beaky like. We're doing this guns blazing.

Because I'm the only one who can walk in the open without getting immediately sprayed down, I'll be taking the first move. Searching for the largest group of operatives lumped together, I joined them and dropped a smoke bo-

"BANG!"

That's a flashbang. Now I can barely hear myself. I can't see but I'm pretty damn sure I'm being pushed around by both panicked operatives and civilians. When My eyesight came back to me, I'm surrounded by fallen operatives with many more joining them as Doomfist is pummeling more. Joining the fray, my job is easier since I can hide my act of friendly firing. Soon, there is too few operatives to oppose us as the rest took flight. Damn that guy packed a deadly right hook. The operatives who got punched are still twitching, while the ones who got hit in the face had their head twisted 180°. Yikes.

Walking outside, a van awaits all 3 of us, with a woman dressed as a jester as the driver. Widowmaker-sama pulls a sour face towards her as she entered the vehicle. Me and Doomfist followed. What I thought would be an escape trip however would soon turn into a high speed car chase as we race through the highway, tailing a black luxurious car. Our bashing and crashing with said car somehow haven't attracted local law enforcement, probably due to our driver, while driving, is doing something with her wrist-mounted computer. Widowmaker-sama showcased her excellent sniping skill as she managed to kill the driver, sending the car crashing into the sideline, though not too badly damaged.

Coming out of the car is a man, in a really expensive looking suit, looking really angry. Accompanying him is two individual that I
recognized. These two are the people that took Mr. Dario away! As the van stopped and me, Doomfist and Widowmaker confronted the man and his two lackeys, a truck arrived on the scene. Out of it came a rather large looking man in Talon outfit. His armor is considerably much more bulkier than the usual lackeys. He's packing a big and mean looking shotgun too. Accompanying him is more Talon mooks.

"You are LATE Viper! Now take care of these clowns so I can get the hell out of here!"

"....understood.", the large man answered.

"We can't let these worms hinder us! Some of us must go and catch Vialli before he escape!", Doomfist shouted, his presence intimidating the lesser mooks present here. Of course not me since I am a mook of a higher level.

Do I....

> Follow Doomfist in handling this Viper guy and other mooks

>Follow Widowmaker-sama and that jester girl in chasing Vialli

>Volunteer to take care of the mooks myself

>>2485490
>Follow Doomfist
Let's see if we can be as awesome as we were back against Seeker. Also, this ways is 2 and 2.

>>2485490
> Follow Doomfist in handling this Viper guy and other mooks
We’re not crazy enough to think we can handle all these guys by ourself, I’d hope.

>>2485490
>>Volunteer to take care of the mooks myself
This is bold, but practically suicidal knowing how our fight with Seeker went. Unless Mr. Dario visits, turns out to be Viper, or we decide to delay by running away, I don't see how we can turn the fight around.
>>2485490
>Because I'm the only one who can walk in the open without getting immediately sprayed down, I'll be taking the first move. Searching for the largest group of operatives lumped together, I joined them and dropped a smoke bo-
Aside from using the smoke bomb.

> Follow Doomfist in handling this Viper guy and other mooks

Rolled 10 (1d20)

>>2485497
>>2485519
>>2485523

Rolling. Let's hope this does not go catastrophically wrong

>>2485532
Perfectly mediocre, I guess. Probably good enough not to get in Doomfist’s way, at least.

>>2485532

"Remember Widowmaker, Sombra, I want Vialli alive!", Doomfist shouted at Widowmaker-sama and the jester girl.

Readying my rifle, i stood side by side with Doomfist, feeling badass as fuck. This however is cut short as we have to dive for cover. Hiding behind our van, the Talon operatives working for Vialli kept on spraying on us while the Viper guy just watch. Me and Doomfist realized that this thing won't hold for long and I ran and sprayed from the left to kill and distract the other mook as they drained their magazine. The mooks managed to clip some shots on my shoulder and grazed my legs but nothing vital. The remaining mooks felt the rage of Doomfist as their body was flung to the air like ragdolls.

Yeah....Doomfist. Now I remembered. He was one of the Talon big shots back then.... 8 years ago. I was just a kid watching the news. He beat the shit out of 2 Overwatch's top agents but he got stomped by the 3rd one who came to capture him. Fuck, how could I forget, with his gauntlets, he seemed nigh unstoppable. I kinda admired him a little bit back then before my aprents told me he's a criminal who killed lots of people.

Oh wait yeah, I'm fighting. Looks like all of the operatives are down and Viper finally stepped in. This guy is only slightly smaller than Doomfist, but still pretty damn large. B-but that's not because I'm a manlet okay?! 5'11" is average for male!

Viper distanced himself close enough to put his shotgun at its effective range, but not too close as to let Doomfist hit him. When he fired his weapon, I realized that the shrapnel coming out of it fucking melts the concrete road. Yikes!

His armor covers every part of his body, and its pretty high quality too since I just can't pierce it with this standard mook assault rifle. Luckily, I manage to clip some hits on the crevices of the combat armor, specifically around the legs, prompting him to kneel. Doomfist, seeing this as an opening, advanced swiftly to finish this guy off. Viper is quick enough to raise his shotgun and shoot at Doomfist who used his right arm to block the shot. Unfazed, Doomfist smashed the man's head, sending him and his helmet flying. Sitting on top of the fallen enemy, the African man repeatedly pummel his chest without mercy.

Holding my shoulder and slightly limping I approached this man called Viper, only to see a familiar face, much to my horror.

"Wait, Doomfist, stop!"

"Why, are you showing mercy to the enemy?", Doomfist said as he stopped beating Viper and rose up.

"No... Mr. Dario...."

I sat next to the bruised and bloodied man. My saviour, now beaten to a pulp on the ground. His face so swollen I doubt he can fully open his eyes.

"Matthew, Slim? That you?", Dario asked his voice is shaky and burdened.

"Y-yes...", i answered.

"So t-that's you huh. Kiddo, you fought good. I n-never would have guessed i-it was y-y-", he was not able to complete his words as he start to cough up blood.

(Cont.)

>>2485562
Well shit. Was kind of expecting it, but still, it’s a damn shame. I’d like to hope we can stabilize, we Doomfist probably just broke so many ribs.

>>2485567
We can stabilize him, but Doomfist probably just broke so many limbs*

>>2485523
>Unless Mr. Dario visits, turns out to be Viper,
>>2485562
>"So t-that's you huh. Kiddo, you fought good. I n-never would have guessed i-it was y-y-", he was not able to complete his words as he start to cough up blood.
God damn it.

>>2485567
On the bright side, we would've been wrecked had we tried to duel him.

>>2485568
*Ribs, god damn it all. Wonder why he joined them though? Coercion? Some sort of brainwashing? Hm.

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>>2485562

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mcLjmxout-A

(cont.)

"Mr. Dario, please. We can get you help. I can call the hospital, see? I'll get you to safety, it's my turn to save you."

"N-no kiddo. Even if I c-can be saved at this point, I'll be thrown into jail. I d-don't want to die surr-surrounded by scoundrels and grey concrete walls. I want to die in peace!"

I held his hand as he gripped mine tighter.

"Why?", I asked. At this point I'm almost crying.

"Vialli, held someone I ch-cherished in danger. He used it to m-make me work for him.", tears start to flow down his face, as do mine.

"P-perhaps this is m-my punishment. I took a-a lot of....life. G-god gave me a painful death....and hell i-is my next d-destination...."

"Don't say it like that....please.", I said, my head resting on his mauled combat armor.

"At l-least I am blessed with this last moment of peace, mourned by someone who cared for me. T-this is goodbye kid. The o-only thing I could tell you to d-do now i-is to quit wh-while you're ahead... don't b-be like me...."

"No! This is not the time to be saying that kind of thing! We can still save you! We can-"

My words are cut short as Dario's body turned stiff, his skin goes cold. The night's wind blown over my body felt razor sharp as sadness engulfed me. Above, I saw a white spectre, giving me one last smile as it depart for the hereafter.

A wet feeling in my helmet. I-is this tears? When was the last time I cried. This is so goddamn frustrating. I killed loads of people in just a span of a few days with no remorse but I cried for a stranger whom i just met yesterday? Damn it!

"DARIOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!"

Punching the ground repeatedly, I shouted and cried, with Doomfist idly watching, waiting for his comrade's return. They eventually did with Vialli dragged on the ground.

"You know, I don't really appreciate attempts on my life, but that is not the reason I'm angry with you.", Doomfist said to the disgraced Vialli as he raised the man's body by his head using only one head.

"No, Mr. Vialli. I'm angry with you because of what you did with Talon. You turned us into mere criminals as you fattened yourself with money and wealth. That ends..."

CRACK! SNAP!

Vialli's head crushed under the sheer grip of Doomfist's hand. Throwing the lifeless body of the ex-Talon council member, he walked at me and asked...

"Now, do you truly wish to walk this path, or will you return to being a sheep in the herd?"

>[] I will walk this path

>[] I refuse

>>2485587
>[] I will walk this path
Sorry Dario, but it’s a bit late to turn back now, innit? Don’t think “Talon Mook” would get us very many jobs if we put it on our resume.

Holy shit what did i just write. This was supposed to be a shitpost/ fanfic of OWQ

>>2485587
>>2473307
Uh, I don't know. We originally came for the paycheck. Maybe we can start our own organization.
>>2485587
>"No, Mr. Vialli. I'm angry with you because of what you did with Talon. You turned us into mere criminals as you fattened yourself with money and wealth. That ends..."
Do we know what Talon stood for?

>>2485592
"Professional emergency, military response?"

>>2485598
Is it too late to turn back?

>>2485598
I kind of figured, considering how we started it off. Still, it’s been fun. Wouldn’t be the first quest to start with a shitpost.

>>2485598
Dude I don't know how you did this but good job? Keep it up? Hell I don't even know. Maybe make it a quest and figure out how to de-shitpost it? I have no clue.

>>2485562
>5'11
Sure buddy, add that extra inch.

>>2485587
What a Twist!

>[] I will walk this path
Doom is probably gonna punch us.

>>2485618
>Doom is probably gonna punch us.
For what?

>>2485602
>>2485587
>>[] I will walk this path
Not gonna let his death be in vain.

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>>2485602

He did not read the wiki kek

>>2485592
>>2485618
>>2485621

"I.... will walk this path."

Picking myself up, I followed Doomfist and the rest and got into a vehicle this Sombra girl had "acquired". A few hours on the road and we reached an airport, entered a private jet and flew off. I asked Sombra, now out of her jester get up and into what she says is her usual outfit, which is not much better in my opinion, on where we are headed. She said that we are headed towards Venice, in a location where all of the Talon council members meet.

I slept halfway through the flight. Sombra drew some stuff on my face, like an eyepatch over my left eye that has mostly recovered my now. After yet another trip, we arrived into some sort of castle surrounded by modern architectures. Deeper inside, we are greeted by Reaper who followed us into the inner champbers where more individuals gather.

Reaper and Doomfist took a seat around the conference table along with the individuals already present while I and Widowmaker instinctively stood beside Doomfist and Reaper. Sombra stood outside saying that meetings like this tend to be boring as she wander off with a mischievous look. As if he was meant to start this meet up, Doomfist spoke a single sentence that I shall remember for the rest of my life.

"Talon, it is time to start a war."

[END]

do discussion, gibs criticism on my writing, bash me whatever give this thread more post to bloat my ego

>>2485629
>He did not read the wiki kek
>wiki
>quest

Will Talon Operative #2314 ever be more than a mere mook?

For you fags plebs who are not patrician enough to read the wiki, 70% of this quest is a remake of the Doomfist comic. It started as a shitpost, but you anons stuck on with me till the end even when it became a serious quest. Thread 2 never will be done this weekend if I have the time. thank you for reading this horrible piece of writing and I wish you wonderful (albeit varying degree of autistic) anons a good day/ night.

>>2485635
>tfw we will never sneak into windowsamas bedroom while she is in the shower, to steal her sweaty gym stockings and make off with it as our most prized possession.

>>2485629
If you want us to metagame then we could read wiki.

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>>2485649
fair enough i guess. aside from a few things, everything from here on out will be independent though.


With my superior talent and 9000 hours on ms paint, I have visualised #2314's current appearance. Behold!

>>2485655
Too old, and not enough hair.
Needs to look a little bit more like a 25 year old neet virgin, that played too much mil sims and airsoft+RTS and FPS games