>>2639338
Don't forget that we can supposedly do magic if we can figure it out because we married a kitsune. Also, I love what you're doing, our character was and is absolutely the dadliest catch our wife could hope for.

File: Bacon Eggs Coffee.jpg (45 KB, 450x450)

45 KB JPG

>>2639338
You wake up in the dark, pretty sure you've had a crazy dream, but you can't quite remember it.

Your wife is still sleeping next to you, looking more relaxed than she has for years, tails spread across the bed.

Maybe it's the relaxation that come from not having to keep that sort of secret anymore.

You're certainly not relaxed about all the recent revelations. Well, your reaction to your wife's has been positive, but certainly not "relaxed". It's been, uh, rather 'hard'.

Your reaction to your daughter's demonslaying has been hard in a different sense.

And then you remember that today is Monday, and you settle into the ingrained routine of workdays for years. You're an accountant - of course you have a routine.

You disentangle yourself from those oh-so-fluffy tails and head into the kitchen to make coffee and rustle up a little breakfast.

As you fry bacon and eggs, waiting for the coffee to boil, you hear soft footsteps coming.

You don't turn around. Bacon and eggs takes CONCENTRATION, dammit, but you do catch a reflection in the front of the microwave.

>It's black hair (Harriet)
>It's pink hair (Mary)
>It's blue hair (Sue)
>It's a red ponytail (Karen)

[META NOTE: Votes run on 20 minute timers from first voting post at first, then shift to 10 minutes from first voting post, once the thread accumulates a critical mass of players. Occasionally, I'll ask for D100 rolls - high is good, low is bad.]

>>2639415
>It's blue hair (Sue)

>>2639415
>It's blue hair (Sue)
Never gonna get tired of shooting her down, sometimes literally.

>>2639415
>>It's blue hair (Sue)

File: Questing In A Nutshell.jpg (52 KB, 400x400)

52 KB JPG

[META POST]
Twitter: for rutimes and my comments:https://twitter.com/HaikuDeluge
Please treat all comments about happening quest events as you would the joshing commentary of an older brother who's seen the show before. It is all in fun, and definitely not canon.

Archive: for catching up on this quest: http://suptg.thisisnotatrueending.com/qstarchive.html?tags=Shotgun
Due to archiving issues, 'Shotgun' is the only tag that works.

You don't know why?

Read the damn threads.


>>2639383
>absolutely the dadliest catch our wife could hope for

Why do you think a multi-tailed supernatural fox even bothered to marry him?

>>2639418
15:03 - 15:23 Voting Period (or 20min from quoted post, for other timezones)

>>2639415
>>It's black hair (Harriet)

>>2639415
>It's black hair (Harriet)

>>2639415
>It's black hair (Harriet)

>>2639415
>It's black hair (Harriet)

>>2639415
>It's black hair (Harriet)

>>2639415
>It's black hair (Harriet)

>>2639338
This shit is still going on? I thought it was supposed to be a 1-2 shot.

>>2639497
It's fun. Why not keep it going?

>>2639415
>It's black hair (Harriet)

>>2639415
>It's a red ponytail (Karen)

>>2639415
>>It's black hair (Harriet)
HA HA TIME FOR MORE DAD THINGS TO DO!

Votes:

Sue:
>>2639418
>>2639434
>>2639439

Harriet:
>>2639446
>>2639462
>>2639465
>>2639469
>>2639475
>>2639487
>>2639499
>>2639516

Karen:
>>2639506

>>2639497
>I thought it was supposed to be a 1-2 shot.
I started thread 1 blackout drunk, on a whim, but I've realized there's a lot of good material in the premise to unpack.

...And apparently a playerbase that wants to be along for the ride.

>>2639499
>>2639527
Oh great a oneshot being stretched out to a full series. We all know how well those always turn out...

>>2639527
We can't help it Haiku. We enjoy a good Dad-Quest.

File: Still Harriet.jpg (642 KB, 1240x1754)

642 KB JPG

>>2639415
Usually, you're up and out of the house before either your wife or daughter is awake. Being in early pays in your business, and even if it didn't, you'd prefer to spend your time at work instead of sitting in traffic.

It's too bad you don't get to see your family in the morning most of the time, but your wife's a stay-at-home novelist, writing urban fantasy, and your daughter's a schoolgirl who can get away with running after the bus with toast in her mouth.

"You're up early," you say to the black-haired apparition behind you, "smell of bacon wake you up?"

"Not really," she says, sitting down at the kitchen table, already dressed in her school uniform, "I'm an early riser. Might as well make the most of the year."

You can't quite argue with that, but you feel something pressing on your heart at the thought of a girl that young, who's repeated the same year over and over to try to stave off the apocalypse.

Or maybe she's delusional.

"So," you ask, as a father, "you ever try telling your parents about this whole thing?"

"Yes," she says, her expression getting a degree colder, "once. And it worked out so well that time that I've been getting legal emancipation from them as fast as I could every time after that. Little more freedom that way."

That gives you pause. Did they commit her to a mental institution? Do something even worse?

They don't sound like wonderful parents. When you found out what your daughter had been doing, you hugged her and took her out for ice cream.

You flip the bacon.

>So, you live on your own now?
>How does the world end?
>How did you get emancipation that fast, at your age?
>WRITE IN

>>2639604
>>So, you live on your own now?
You could live with us.

>>2639604
>So, you live on your own now?
>Coffee or Orange Juice?

>>2639604
>>So, you live on your own now?
>>How does the world end?

>>2639604
>that abd huh?
>>So, you live on your own now?
>Coffee or Orange Juice?

>>2639604
>>So, you live on your own now?
>Coffee or Orange Juice?

>>2639604
>How does the world end?
>How did you get emancipation that fast, at your age?

>>2639614
15:46 - 16:06 (20min after quoted post) voting period.

Might go Speed Questing (10min votes) very soon. Response times are justabout there now.

>>2639547
I appreciate your vote of confidence.

>>2639604
>So, you live on your own now?
>You could live with us.

>Did you just... tell them? Not show and tell? I mean there's very little to argue about once you've seen this hubbub with your own eyes.

>>2639604
>So, you live on your own now?
We're playing the daughteru gacha game.

>>2639652
>gacha game
Hey, you get what you get via votes, and you don't even have to pump real money into it!

>>2639662
>you don't even have to pump real money into it!
Your loss

>>2639666
I'm now going to steal this idea.

File: Harriet.jpg (1.2 MB, 2121x2121)

1.2 MB JPG

>>2639604
"You tell them," you ask, trying to get a full handle on this, while dishing out the bacon and eggs, "or did you show them?"

"Oh," she says, with an intense look in her eyes, "I did both. When you tell someone, you need proof, right?"

There's a slight pause, then she says "you know, every call into the police, into CPS, into the FBI, NASA, SETI, any government agency that could be a threat to them, somehow gets routed to the demons?"

"I'd really prefer not to do that again," she tells you with a sigh, "and my parents aren't exactly the type to go to a shaman or a wizard instead of someone with an acronym on their business card. An acronym that's not their name," she adds, as you raise an eyebrow.

Then the toast pops. Usually, you'd have both pieces, but you slide one onto each plate.

"Coffee or orange juice?" you ask, getting ready to set the table.

"Coffee," she says, "black as my hair."

Alright, you can do that. There's enough in the pot for three. One for you, one for your wife's first cup, and one for her second.

By the time she's through her first, she'll realize that she needs to make more.

"So," you ask, as Harriet begins to tuck into the bacon and eggs, "you're living alone?"

"Yesh," she answers thickly through a mouthful of eggs, "crazy what an apartment a teenager can get when they win the lottery, right?"

Oh. That's time travel for you.

"Enough money to pay off the right people to turn a blind eye to the fact that they're not a legal adult," she continues, crunching into her bacon, "and usually enough, although I've had problems in the past," she says with a grimace, "to pay off enough of the human government to get out into my own place."

>You could live with us
>You're a damn resourceful girl
>As an accountant, I respect you
>Are the bacon and eggs good?
>WRITE IN

>>2639753
>>You're a damn resourceful girl
>>As an accountant, I respect you

>>2639753
>>As an accountant, I respect you

>>2639753
>As an accountant, I respect you

>>2639753
>As an accountant, I respect you
>You could live with us

>>2639753
>You're a damn resourceful girl
>As an accountant, I respect you
>Are the bacon and eggs good?

Why not all three?

>>2639764
Alright, we're speed questing now.

16:26 - 16:36 Voting Period.

I've got a paper towel shoved up my nose for a spontaneous nosebleed. Is this a questing injury?

>>2639753
>You're a damn resourceful girl
>As an accountant, I respect you
>You could live with us

>>2639753
>You could live with us
Winning the lottery is cool and all, but did you never consider crashing at a friends place?

>>2639753
>>2639782
>You're a damn resourceful girl
>As an accountant, I respect you
>Are the bacon and eggs good?
>You could live with us.

Why not all four?

>>2639753
>As an accountant, I respect you
>But you could always live with us, if you prefer

>>2639790
I'd say air humidity is the likelier culprit.

>>2639753
>>You could live with us
>>You're a damn resourceful girl
>>As an accountant, I respect you
You need to socialize more. Being alone is a bad thing at your age.

>>2639753
>>You're a damn resourceful girl
But
>You could live with us

All you people offering a place to live, whilst not even questioning the wife.
Not even letting her have the first cup a coffee.

You all might be liable for a couchin', were the past days not so interesting.

>>2639753
>You could live with us
If you ain't making us roll I'll be sad.

>>2639753
>"you know, every call into the police, into CPS, into the FBI, NASA, SETI, any government agency that could be a threat to them, somehow gets routed to the demons?"

Tch, you're just killing my plan to invite all of their parents and forming a kick-ass parent association.

But you won't foil me that easily! TT owes us one, surely he can host a meeting.

Now unfortunately I need to go to bed. Everyone, write-in and vote sensibly, make us all proud!

>>2639753
>You could live with us
>You're a damn resourceful girl
>As an accountant, I respect you

>>2639753
>You're a damn resourceful girl
>As an accountant, I respect you
>Are the bacon and eggs good?

File: Harriet2.png (1.17 MB, 1200x773)

1.17 MB PNG

>>2639753
"You're a damn resourceful girl," you say, "and, honestly, as an accountant, I respect you."

There's an innate force of hostility that rages up around you, but she tames it down.

She sees your expression, and apologizes, "Sorry," she says, lifting a mouthful of bacon on her fork, "I just..." she sighs, "have a hard time accepting that. Anyone who praises you wants something from you. Parents. Schools. Employers. Everyone. And yes," she says, fixing you with those intense eyes, "even you. At the very least, you want information. You want to know how to get your daughter out of this mess. You want to know what apocalypse to prepare for," she says, standing up from the table, half her food uneaten.

"I'm going back to bed," she tell you, "It'll be inconvenient if some of the others find out I woke up before them."

You watch her walking back down that hallway to your daughter's room, knowing there's nothing you could say or do that could bring her around right now.

That girl is looking for something else.

Something you're not sure you've ever seen. Something you're pretty sure you can't give her.

She wants closure on the end of the world she's seen thirty times.

And then she turns a hair, winks, and whispers "especially Sue."

...Well, that makes some sense.

>Call out after her: "You could live with us."
>Don't -0 you have to go to work

>>2639890
>>Call out after her: "You could live with us.

>>2639890
>>Don't -0 you have to go to work
That's a nest hive we don't wanna shake, also, who can guarantee we can live up to any hope we give her?
That's just cruelty for cruelty's sake.

>>2639890
>>Don't -0 you have to go to work

We already pushed her too far for now.
We'll ask her later.

>>2639890
>>Don't -0 you have to go to work

>>2639890
>I'll have to ask my wife but I want you to come stay with us.
Call this out.

>>2639890
>>Don't -0 you have to go to work

>>2639890
>>Don't -0 you have to go to work

>>2639893
16:52 - 17:02 voting period.

You know the drill.

>>2639890
>>Don't -0 you have to go to work

>>2639890
>I'll have to ask my wife but I want you to come stay with us.

File: The High Rises.png (2.9 MB, 1600x1200)

2.9 MB PNG

>>2639890
"I'm not Harry Potter," you whisper, remembering what you told her last night, and maybe she heard it. Maybe she didn't.

More of your mind is taken up by emptying the remaining coffee in the carafe into a thermos, then setting it to brew three cups. So your wife doesn't have to brew her own later today.

...ok, someday you'll get a better coffee maker.

And then it's off to work.

Stil early enough to evade most of the traffic.

Then you walk in through the familiar doors, and something feels off. Have you just spent enough time with the supernatural that the natural feels odd?

You slam through spreadsheets, review documents, calculate deductions and payroll, you are a typhoon of accounting wisdom and knowledge: co-workers, even those you'd never met before stop by your desk to ask questions you find simple, but they choke on.

And with a few words from you, they see the truth.

A typical Monday.

At least until you hit lunch break. It's not with a client today - you have it to yourself.

>You brought a lunch, eat it while trying to brush up on supernatural things via the internet
>The rat's squeaking a bit, isn't it?
>Call T. T. to set up a Dad's Night Out on the bars!

>>2639890
>Don't -0 you have to go to work

Wait till we get home and make sure its good with our foxy wife.

>>2639967
>>Call T. T. to set up a Dad's Night Out on the bars!

>>2639967
>Call T. T. to set up a Dad's Night Out on the bars!

>>2639967
>>Call T. T. to set up a Dad's Night Out on the bars!

>>2639967
>>Call T. T. to set up a Dad's Night Out on the bars!

>>2639967
>>Call T. T. to set up a Dad's Night Out on the bars!

>>2639984
17:13 - 17:23: Ten minute voting periods.

We're speed questing.

>>2639967
>Call T. T. to set up a Dad's Night Out on the bars!

>>2639967
>>Call T. T. to set up a Dad's Night Out on the bars!

>>2639967
>TFW we and T.T so drunk we just happily singing in the middle of our road about our girls being mahou shoujo

>>2639967
>>Call T. T. to set up a Dad's Night Out on the bars!
It's time to bro it up!

File: T T 3.png (324 KB, 700x1024)

324 KB PNG

>>2639967
Alright, you've got a business card, and you should use is to make a decent business connection.

T. T., it reads, flipped at you when you'd helped him absorb a demon in Eastern Europe. After he'd praised you.

Harriet's words echo in your ears as you dial the number: "Anyone who praises you wants something from you."

"Good noon," a subservient male voice answers, with a hint of an Indian accent, "who do you wish to speak to?"

"T. T." you say, in unmistakable English.

"Are you sure you don't have the wrong number?" the voice asks, with a hint of hindi in it.

"You wish I'd been there at Tunguska," you say, remembering what the red-clad magus? had told you.

"Oh," he says, in a voice bearing nothing of India, "it's you -"

And then you cut him off with a curt "Let's go for beers."

"Sounds good," he says, and name a place to meet that's in an alley near you, assuring you it's a new craft brewery.

You accept - this is what you wanted, after all - beers with another dad. A dad who had a daughter caught up into these rats' magical nonsense.

Now it's back to the daily grind.

>Keep going with Accountant day
>Interrogate the rat somewhere - like a supply closet
>WRITE IN

>>2640084
>>Keep going with Accountant day

>>2640084
>>Keep going with Accountant day
See if the rat can help us crunch numbers

Also, let's make sure to notify the wife.

>>2640084
>Keep going with Accountant day

File: 1476564350916.png (18 KB, 544x392)

18 KB PNG

>>2640084
>Keep going with Accountant day
ARBEIT MACHT FREI!


>>2640084
Also this as well
>>2640098

>>2640084
>Keep going with Accountant day

>>2640084
>>Keep going with Accountant day

>>2640094
17:40 - 17:50 Voting period. Ten minutes from first voting post.

>>2640084
>>Keep going with Accountant day

>>2640115
https://youtu.be/LHsbypcJfkw?t=3m32s
How I imagine the dad to sound like.
Also a tale about bulls, in the embed.

>>2640084
>Keep going with Accountant day
>See if rat can help us crunch number...he can't be a normal japanese salaryman for nothing

File: T T, and the coat's to ma(...).png (215 KB, 500x716)

215 KB PNG

>>2640084
...It's another day of accounting. Taxes for small businesses, appreciations, being heralded as a god for quoting the right government publication to an associate, when he didn't know what it meant.

It's who you are.

You just wish you could make all of them, all the people involved, what you are. But it's not like you've got authority for salaries. That's HR.

And you doubt if they'll recognize some of those up-and-coming talents for anything.

So at the end of the day, you take the elevator to the parking garage, and walk almost straight into the arms of T. T.

"So," he says, "Let's go."

File: A Bar.jpg (124 KB, 1024x768)

124 KB JPG

>>2640162
The man opens a wedgie into spacetime. One that opens into a bar.

Then... you go. It's the sort of place you never would have gone to in your Country Boy days. Never you'd have gone to in your college days, except to snag the sorority chicks there...and that was just as a wingman.

This is a good bar.

A fancy bar. The sort of thing T. T. would drag you into.

And he gets a pair of seats away from the hoi polloi, and asks:

So, why did you accept my invitation?

>Dad beers
>You know about the rats.
>Write in

>>2640246
>Dad beers

>>2640246
>>You know about the rats.

>>2640246
>>Dad beers

>>2640246
>Dad beers
We are going to drink and do karaoke!

>>2640246
>Dad beers

>>2640246
>Things are getting a little hectic with my rat situation. I just needed to get away from it all with some Dad beers for a while.

>>2640246
>>Dad beers

>>2640246
>Dad beers
>Yeah, and you know about rats
>Plus i really needed a breather

>>2640251
18:13 - 18:23, you know the drill.

>>2640297
(You)

File: 912a059fd37d5adc1f6cb7984(...).jpg (55 KB, 720x715)

55 KB JPG

>>2640297

>>2640246
>>Dad beers

>>2640246
>>You know about the rats.

File: T T and maybe he's Drunk.jpg (278 KB, 500x678)

278 KB JPG

>>2640246
"Dad beers," you say, "I only get some many opportunities to talk to someone in the same situation."

"Well," he says, "whaddya wanna know?"

...if you didn't know better, you'd say the man had been pregaming.

"From one father to another," he says, "the rats are full of fuck. Any more questions?"

Yeah, they're full of fuck, and this guy is full of that red wine he seems to love.

Maybe you can get some good answers out of him while he's tipsy.

>What are the contracts?
>Why do you hate the 'rats'?
>Look, I've got a 'rat' in my pocket, want to interrogate him together?
>Jesus H. Christ, why do you drink like that?
>WRITE IN

>>2640380
>What are the contracts?

I feel like pulling the rat out just gets it fucked by T.T.

>>2640380
>What are the contracts?
>Down for some Karaoke in a while?

>>2640382
18:33 - 18:43: Voting Period.

Do the stuff, make your dad proud.

...As if you ever could.

>>2640380
>What are the contracts?
>Down for some Karaoke in a while?

>>2640380
>What are the contracts?
How did you get started with magic?

>>2640380
>>What are the contracts?

>>2640380
>>What are the contracts?
>>Down for some Karaoke in a while?
yea time for dad shinenigans

File: They say this is T T.png (1.07 MB, 819x1400)

1.07 MB PNG

>>2640380
"There are a lot of contracts," T.T. says, looking you straight in the eye, "some are good, some are bad."

You know that, you're a fucking accountant. And no matter how many drinks that waitress gives you, you'll always be an accountant.

"You know what I'm talking about," you tell him, leaning in, "the ones the rats make."

He starts laughing.

"That's what I'm a few over already," he says, eyeing you with a piercing blue eye, "I don't like talking about that when I'm sober."

"As near as I can figure out," he says, and motions for a waitress to refill his glass of wine, "it's, uh, a lot like the standard contract: 'I grant you the ability to cast my magic, you kill demons, I get a percentage of the energy from those demons'. Except there's an extra rider," he says, leaning in toward you, "it's a debt franchise. And one they can't get out of. The rats transfigured our daughters to transform, and the energy that took is given as a loan, which is, eh, far over what their killing demons could get them in five years. Without interest."

"To be fair," he continues, "changing a human to be able to transform like that takes a lot of energy -" he says, then stops to take another swig of wine, "and makes the human in question dependent on magical energy to survive."

"They're trapped," he says, those blue eyes locking with yours, "and since they consented, we can't abrogate it."

A waitress shows back up to your table out of the blue, and asks what you want.

You suddenly realize why the man in front of you, this proud wizard, drinks. And why he takes on "S-Class" demons.

>Something to blow this out of my mind
>My daughter's in debt to this the worst debt collectors - do you have something?
>Double Whisky
>Double Vodka
>WRITE IN

[The karaoke may come. I'll file that away as an option]

>>2640525
>Something to blow this out of my mind
>My daughter's in debt to this the worst debt collectors - do you have something?

>>2640525
>Whiskey

>Alright, now, what if our daughters could generate magic on their own? Or did the fuckers screw that option entirely too?

>>2640525
>>Double Vodka

>>2640535
19:00 - 19:10. You know the drill.

>>2640539
i like this,

>>2640525
>Double Whisky
What if the girl is half Kitsune? would take less energy to wield magic, no?

>>2640525
>Double Whisky
So basically, they screwed them over? Damned magical mustelids.

>>2640542
Lets not get sloshed.
Just an old fashioned.

If we slosh, long island Ice tea. 2.

>>2640525
>WRITE IN

Is there anyone that the rats (as a whole) answer to?

>>2640562
If you respond to the story post, it makes it a lot easier to count votes.

>>2640525
>>Double Whisky
Bring us some of that Ol' number 7

>>2640525
>Double Whisky
JACK DANIELS HEED OUR CRY FOR YOU!

File: Windswept T T.png (426 KB, 1000x733)

426 KB PNG

>>2640525
"Double Whisky," you tell the waitress, and then she flits off.

Something, anything, to blow this out of your mind, is what you want right now.

"So, T.T.," you ask, "what if one of our daughters could generate her own magical energy?"

His eyes go wide. He begins to mutter,

"What if they could transform on their own?" you ask, "how would that interact? What if they were half-kitsune and got pulled into a contract like that?"

With the air of a true scientist, he looks you dead in the eyes and says: "I don't - " then with the eyes of a father - "fucking know."

Then the waitress brings you your double whisky. And you down it.

Just for tonight, you'd like to forget about all this, all this crazy shit that wasn't on you before you landed in this magical world.

"Hey," T.T. says, "got any more questions before I'm too sober to be truthful?"

>WRITE IN

>>2640638
>How much do you know about time travel and end of the world prophecies?

>>2640651
19:22 - 19:32 voting window (10min from quoted post)

You know the drill.

>>2640638
>Whens the next time we do this

File: 1525140161666.png (428 KB, 700x741)

428 KB PNG

>>2640638
"Is it possible to give these girls more than enough magical energy to pay off the debt?"

I wonder if demons worshiping us can produce magical energy or if it HAS to be life energy to pay off the so called debt.

>>2640638
is hell real?

>>2640638
>couldn't you make your own magic generator from the bad demons to pay off the debt and juice the girls?

>>2640638
>How much do you know about time travel and end of the world prophecies?

>>2640638
Are there other ways of harvesting magical energy?

>>2640638
>show him your ring "she's a kitsune, we've been married for years, think i could have gathered mana passively or something?"
>"how do i fireball?"

>>2640638
How can i harvest energy to help my daughter (like you do).

What do you know about prophecies or time travel.

File: T T Posing.jpg (259 KB, 577x814)

259 KB JPG

>>2640638
"Too sober to be truthful?" you ask, "more like too drunk to lie."

"Same thing," he says, "so go on."

"You know anything about Time Travel and End of the World prophecies?" you ask him.

"There was someone I had a... passing acquaintance with," he says, grimacing a little, "who did time magic. Not a friend. And I don't know anything about End of the World prophecies other than the influence of 'Revelations' on demonology and Gnosticism."

Well, that's a strikeout. So you'll try hitting close to home plate this time.

"Any other way to harvest magical energy to pay off that debt?"

"Why do you think I was trying to absorb an S-Class?" he asks you, "when you first met me in Eastern Europe."

Well, it wasn't to get power for territory, as Mary (the young pink-haired goddess, and also gang leader) had assumed.

There's an intensity in his eyes that only another father could ever understand. He did it to get the best for his kid.

"Did it work?" you ask, wondering if you should just find an S-Class and kill it for your daughter.

T.T. shakes his head, a little too forcefully, then fixes you with his eyes, "Do you know how interest works?" he asks, "What about franchise loans? Franchise loans on a body modification? The franchise loans on a body modification that's supposed to be a lifetime asset for the rats - lifetime for the assets, not the rats. As far as I know, the rats are immortal.

Our daughters will be in debt until they die. All we can do is stave that off."

That should have hit you like a sledgehammer. Sounds like usury.

...But it didn't. You're a little tipsy. And you blurrily realize that this is what T. T. has been doing.

How he's been dealing with having a magical girl for a daughter.

"Let's go somewhere more interesting," T.T. tells you, opening a portal, a terrifying wedgie in the universe's backside.

>This had better not be a strip club - I'm a married man!
>Are you sure you're good to portal?

>>2640818
>>This had better not be a strip club - I'm a married man!
>>Also my wife will kill me.....in bed

>>2640818
>>Are you sure you're good to portal?

Please, we probably have the best woman in the world. The strip club will do nothing to us.

>>2640818
>Are you sure you're good to portal?

Note to Drunk Us: Interrogate Rat to find the best way to completely pay off the debt that won't take a literal fucking eternity.

>>2640818
>This had better not be a strip club - I'm a married man!

>>2640818
>Can you get me a copy of a contract?new, used, doesn’t matter long as it’s while and up to date.

>>2640818
>Are you sure you're good to portal?
>[Laugh] The girls need serious help from an accountant and I just happen to be one.

>>2640828
19:54 - 20:04, yadda yadda.

>>2640832
>Please, we probably have the best woman in the world.
T. T. is also a married man with two daughters.

>>2640851
Buut, his wife isn't a literal kistune.

>>2640818
>Are you sure you're good to portal?

>>2640841
The usual ways apply.
We can make the rats owe us their lives, hostile takeover their corporation(or equivalent), find something that would make them consider waiver away the contract. etc.

>>2640897
Basically, become the bigger evil.

>>2640897
yep. we'll become fucking google(or comcast) if we need to.

>>2640897
>>2640911
Other ways:

>Find alternative (magic) income sources. (Check with in-laws)
>Reduce energy expenditure. (Refine the girls transformations and attacks to lower costs)

>>2640818
> So how do we kill the rats is the question.

>>2640818
>Are you sure you're good to portal?

File: Another Bar.jpg (1.45 MB, 1920x1080)

1.45 MB JPG

>>2640818
"Are you sure you're good to portal?" you ask the wizard, wondering about those eyes, and a few of the things he's said.

"Definitely," he says, "and we're not going to a strip club," he tells you, somehow chucking you through spacetime's wedgie as he leaps through it.

You'll chalk it up to not expecting it. There was nothing you could have done.

Maybe he had you from the moment you walked into the former bar.

You're now outside a very different looking bar. The accountant in you categorizes it as both a dive bar and a 'real money earner'.

"So I've got a few tips for you," T.T. says, "don't fuck with the bouncers, don't get slammed, and, if someone wants to fight you, don't pull you magic or your weapon before them."

"Oh," he continues, "and I feel like some of the other dangers in there, you're insulated from as a VERY married man."

...He's slammed. And you can't place this bar front on any street you know.

So you walk in the doors with him.

And the bouncer intones, in the beepest bass you've heard from any throat:

"T.T., and GUEST, please ENTER".

And suddenly you're inside.

>Hang with T.T.
>Just hit the bar
>The poker tables looks like a great place to be
>Write In

>>2640925
>(Refine the girls transformations and attacks to lower costs)
Doubt that is possible, since the rats transform them. It would be easier to ask TT how he seals the demons and teach them how to do that.

>>2640952
>>Hang with T.T.

>>2640952
>The poker tables looks like a great place to be
>Inb4 we literally clean satan out of his money while drunk off our ass by complete accident and we won't remember any of it.

>>2640952
>The poker tables looks like a great place to be

>>2640964
20:20 - 20:30 VOTING PERIOD

>>2640965
How do you know Satan would be at those tables?

(He's a bit more honorable on his debts than some of his troops.)

>>2640952
>>>Hang with T.T.

>>2640978
Because Satan can't turn down a good game of poker.

>>2640952
>Hang with T.T.

>>2640957
Give them magic shotguns. Must be cheaper than transforming

>>2640952

>Hang with T.T.

File: Dude at the Shrimp Counter.png (439 KB, 537x759)

439 KB PNG

>>2640952
You've seen this before.
You just didn't expect to see it with him.

Half the folks in the bar know this guy, and he walked in drunk.

You were supporting him.

So you walk him to the bar. Order a water for the amazing magus.

...And then someone slides into the bar on your other side.

>Do I know you?
>Do you know him?
>Who the fuck are you?
>Write in

>>2641048
>>Do you know him?

>>2641048
>>Do you know him?
His turf; his people.

>>2641048
>>Do you know him?

>>2641048
>Do you know him?

>>2641048
>Do you know him?

>>2641053
>>2641054
>>2641057
>>2641058
Why would someone go for that?

Give that idea to me and I will find a world worth dying for in what you wanted

>>2641048
"Alright, cocksuckers"

That's what you slammed into those those various ideas.

Did those terrible ideas profit off my ideaition of what an electric guitar is him?

Suck my cock, douchebag,

>>2641066
>>2641074
what?

>>2641082
... my guess is that op might be drunk. or has someone else that is shitposting while he's away.

>>2641066
>>2641074
He's lost it, shame.

>>2641048
Its our brother-in-law.

>>2641048
"You to wanted to create you we all moved, didn't you all?

>>2641089
I wonder if our alcohol choices at the start of this bar hopping adventure literally us picking out what booze he's going to down.

OH. i know what is happening! the pretty motherfucker is telepathic, is drunk as balls and is projecting is ramblings on us.

>>2641048
> Hey, are we related?

Fox dude, we married a Fox, IDK how many there are kicking around.

>>2641048
This guy is trying to come on as the kitsune idea that NONE of us could do, do matter how CRISP those ideas are.

>>2641066
>>2641074
>>2641095
>>2641124
Do you need medical help?

>>2641134
This could also be his way of bailing out, but let's watch the madhouse unfold.

>>2641124
Wait what is happening?

>>2641167
I think OP got mugged

>>2641181
RIP QM, another good one bites the dust.

Press F to grieve.

F

>>2641185
F
This is all that fucking rat fault

>>2641048
There's something about getting a father drunk that no other man should do.

Even if the warp comes to him him to create some strange court for it.

...And even if that other man is down for those ideas.>>2641048

did someone drop GHB in the mc's glass?

>>2641208
How did you get this fucked up in under an hour.

Something about being in here, in this place, destroys what should be, and substitutes what it.

Votes from last thing what I remember:

Do You know him?
>>2641053
>>2641054
>>2641058
>>2641064

It's our brother in law
>>2641094

>>2641251
You don't want to know how I drink.

>>2641253
>You don't want to know how I drink.

But we do Haiku. We do want to know how you drink.

>>2641253
please stop using liquor bottles as suppositories, it's just wrong

>>2641253
> https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=8LO_uew-F9M#

Reminder that you can't vomit vapor

File: The City.jpg (549 KB, 1920x1200)

549 KB JPG

>>2641053
>>2641054
>>2641057
>>2641058
>>2641064
>>2641066
>>2641074
>>2641082
>>2641089
>>2641091
>>2641094
>>2641095
>>2641106
>>2641119
>>2641121
>>2641124
>>2641134
>>2641164
>>2641167
>>2641181
>>2641185
>>2641195
>>2641208
>>2641246
>>2641251
>>2641253
>>2641261
>>2641265
>>2641267
You feel piledriven into hell, but you're not quite there.

Something looking over you from above dies into a sea of vodka.

...He's fucked, but your're a dad, not some drunk dick running quests.

And you're ok, right?

>Grab T.T. to get you the fuck out of this bar
>Just get out to the exit yourself
>Close your eyes and hope this was all a stupid nightmare.

>>2641307
Guys, best to let OP rest for now.

>>2641307
>Grab T.T. to get you the fuck out of this bar

>>2641307
>get another whiskey.

>>2641308
First voting post at 21:54, voting closes at 22:04

>>2641307
>Grab T.T. to get you the fuck out of this bar

>>2641307
>>Grab T.T. to get you the fuck out of this bar

GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

>>2641307
>>Grab T.T. to get you the fuck out of this bar

>>2641307
>ask T.T. if he's seeing the same shit as us and if any of this is normal?
>get ready to gtfo with him

>>2641307
>>>Grab T.T. to get you the fuck out of this bar

>>2641307
. . . .

Just go to sleep bro.

>>2641307
I'll support >>2641315

File: You, uh, came to this bar(...).jpg (477 KB, 600x800)

477 KB JPG

>>2641307
You climb toward the fuckface that brought you here and mouth "get me out".

He pulls you through the door.

"I was pretty sure sure you could take it," the guy in the red suit tells you, "the atmosphere in there is damn intense. Even if it's a neutral zone."

"Neutral how?" you ask him, "and you said this would be fun."

"Look," the winebibbing cocksucker says, "I didn't realize you'd collapse in there. I thought you'd have an idea of what you'd be facing, I thought it would be a good guys' night out for us."

Ok, great, T.T. is drunk off his ass.

...And somehow you're worse.

>GET. US. OUT. OF. HERE,
>This was a good idea, a wonderful idea. Fantastic, even, T. T. Just get us out.
>You baited me into this and got me wrecked, this is your fault, T. T.
>Write in

>>2641359
>>Write in
Maybe next time we should begin in a place like this. Remember that i just have one week dealing with magical stuff.

>>2641359
>>GET. US. OUT. OF. HERE,

>>2641359
Supporting this
>>2641365

>>2641359
backing this >>2641365

>>2641359
>seriously, the fuck is going on? yesterday i was still standing in front of a.. goddess in training? and now i just don't even
also, this: >>2641365

>>2641365
22:15 - 2:15 Voting Period.

Help me god, I've fucked up and pissed off my questers. What is my penance?

Selecting Squares with vehicles?

I can do that.

>>2641359
Supporting >>2641365

>>2641377
i thinnk people are more confused than mad

>>2641359
I'll support>>2641365

>>2641377
And now we've entered the stage of Bargaining/Depression.

>>2641383
As far as I'm concerned, I think it's okay so far concerning the whole drunkenness incharacter and out of character.
Now that I think about it. I wonder if it is too late to drunk confess our love to the Rat?

>>2641389
our love to skin him clean and then throw him away in some old forgotten redneck county? yes.

File: It's this guy.jpg (243 KB, 429x607)

243 KB JPG

>>2641359
"Maybe next time," you say, "we should start in a place like this, instead of coming here half drunk."

"That's a good idea," your red-suited burden tells you.

...Ok, he's fucked, and you're at least 3/4ths fucked. By liquor.

You're a married man.

,,,But you might be a divorced man after this stunt. Which you really had little control over.

>Just don't try your magic like this - I'll get you home
>Just portal us home, man
>Just, uh, that fire thing? Do it!
>Look, man you're fucked up, don't try anything. I'll get us home

>>2641399
>Just, uh, that fire thing? Do it!

>>2641399
>>Just, uh, that fire thing? Do it!

>>2641399
>>Just, uh, that fire thing? Do it!

>>2641399
>>Just don't try your magic like this - I'll get you home

>>2641394
We're drunk so we have to cut off at the I love you part for the humorous part
>>2641399
.>Look, man you're fucked up, don't try anything. I'll get us home

>>2641401
22:29 - 22:39 Voting period

You know the drill.

>>2641399
>Look, man you're fucked up, don't try anything. I'll get us home
and so we took a taxi out of hell

>>2641399
>Just don't try your magic like this - I'll get you home

Jesus dude. Learn some better coping skills. It's a Monday FFS.

> make the rat port us hime, keeping it out of T.T.s sight.

File: Look, I just want to play.png (2.54 MB, 1680x1638)

2.54 MB PNG

>>2641399
"Hey," you tell him, "don't try shit unless I'm dead."

His limp acceptance tells you everything you need to know about the alcoholic battle he's waged against the knowledge that the rats had one, or both of his daughters.

He's been dealing with it like this.

You've taken a shot (or several) at what he's doing. And it's just not worth it.

The alcohol is clearing from your synapses as you hail a taxi and bundle him into it.

...Hopefully he can remember his address. Before he racks up a terrifying taxi bill.

Now you'd got to deal with anyone who followed the two of you out of the bar.

"Hey!" you hear down the alley, "this is still where no mortals give a shit!"

>Run
>Take him
>Ask what the rules are

>>2641434
>Ask what the rules are
"AND A CHING CHONG BING BONG TO YOU TOO GOOD SIR!"

>>2641439
22:52 - 32:02 Voting Period.

Here we go.

>>2641434
>Ask what the rules are

>>2641434
>>Ask what the rules are

>>2641434
>Alright! Good to know!

i really want to say >>2641439 , but being drunk its not an excuse to fuck up.

>>2641434
>Ask what the rules are
then immediately kick trash into his face

File: Ref.jpg (12 KB, 150x150)

12 KB JPG

>>2641434
"So what are the rules?" you ask, and then you see someone dressed in sunglasses dash out of the shadows.

"Alright!" he yells, "You should all know back alley rules for this bar!"

"Everyone starts with fisticuffs! If you pull weapons or magic out first - well, if you lose, uh, you know what that means. WHAT DOES IT MEAN?"

"YOU SUCK!" the fast gathering crowd yells.

"If you win," he continues, then waits for the response,

"WHO FUCKING CARES?"

"Oh, and," he says, looking around, as if he wants to see his supervisor, "we'd prefer if you didn't splash someone across our walls. Police suck cock."

"You guys ready?" the guy in a ref' uniform yells.

>Yeah, you're ready
>No, you really, really, need to consult with your corner,

Who happens to be:
>Blue/Sue
>Red/Karen
>Your Daughter
>How the fuck did T.T. get back here?

>>2641477

>Yeah, you're ready
>How the fuck did T.T. get back here?

>>2641480
second

>>2641480
23:10 - 23:20 Voting Window.

You know the drill.

>>2641477
>No, you really, really, need to consult with your corner,
>Blue/Sue

In the times like this where this girl is very very useful

>>2641477
>>Yeah, you're ready
>Red/Karen

>>2641485
also not stalking us because you know....she dont want his daddy hurt or anything....or at least bone him once in her life

>>2641477
>>Yeah, you're ready
>>How the fuck did T.T. get back here?

>>2641477
>No, you really, really, need to consult with your corner,
>Blue/Sue

File: They Say this is also T T.jpg (156 KB, 600x750)

156 KB JPG

>>2641477
Ok, how the hell did T.T. get back here? You just packed him off to his family in a taxi.

...It's probably better not ask.

"Look," he tells you, just in your ear, "I vouched for you here, If you get killed by that guy, I'll lose face."

And THAT'S supposed to give a good explanation for him coming back to sit in your corner like a boxing manager?

"And remember," he whispers to you, "even if you bring out that shotgun first, he still loses if he loses."

"That guy's a psycho," he tells you, "and if you can just taunt him into a stupid attack, you can probably get him!"

..Then the GONG goes off.

> It's fisticuffs - just close with him
>You're better at wrasslin', so go for that
>Hang back and look for an opportunity

[GIMME A D100]

>>2641513
>You're better at wrasslin', so go for that

Rolled 98 (1d100)

>>2641513
>>You're better at wrasslin', so go for that

>>2641519
23:31 - 23:41, or 10 minutes after quoted post - voting period.

>>2641519
Give me a roll

Rolled 87 (1d100)

>>2641513
>It's fisticuffs - just close with him

Rolled 71 (1d100)

>>2641513
>>You're better at wrasslin', so go for that

>>2641527
>>2641526
Stop rolling

The average is high

File: This guy.jpg (1.03 MB, 1300x915)

1.03 MB JPG

>>2641513
You jump at the fox-eared bastard.

Wrasslin' is something you know. You shoot at his knees, then feel him fall.

Wait, fox ears?

He doesn't want to go down, and he has more power than you.

And he smells familiar.

>Bait him into pulling his weapon first (an idea flits across your mind): "I fucked your sister last night!"
>Sling out the shotgun, and try for the shot on it
>Wrassle him to the ground

>>2641539
>>Bait him into pulling his weapon first (an idea flits across your mind): "I fucked your sister last night!"
>Write-in
>Punch in the gonads

>>2641547
23:44 - 23:54 voting period.

YOU KNOW THE DRILL

TAKE HIM OUT

>>2641539
>"I fucked your sister last night"
then >>2641547

>>2641539

>Bait him into pulling his weapon first (an idea flits across your mind): "I fucked your sister last night!"
GO FOR THE DICK

>>2641539
this, >>2641549
a cheap shot is a good shot

>>2641539
>>2641547
yes

>>2641539
>>Bait him into pulling his weapon first (an idea flits across your mind): "I fucked your sister last night!"

>>2641539
>Bait him into pulling his weapon first (an idea flits across your mind): "I fucked your sister last night!"

File: slightly pensive fox boi.jpg (410 KB, 500x690)

410 KB JPG

>>2641539
"I fucked you sister last night," you tell him, as you realize what you've been smelling from him.

"Yeah," he says with a sharp indraw of breath, "Makes me your brother-in-Law, huh?"

...There's still something dangerous, even if he's being civil.

The he suddenly unsheathes his sword, and tries to stab you with it.

"You want a draw," you ask, your shotgun pointed at him, "or do you want to die?"

[The apparent Brother-in Law:]
>A draw sounds good
>How about you come to visit us sometime?
>No, I'd REALLY like to keep going with this
>WRITE IN