>>3711290
>>Heeeeeeey, Mibird, If you like wine, have you tried sangria?

>>3711290
>Heeeeeeey, Mibird, If you like wine, have you tried sangria?

>>3711290
>Heeeeeeey, Mibird, If you like wine, have you tried sangria?

>>3711290
>>Heeeeeeey, Mibird, If you like wine, have you tried sangria?

>>3711290
>>Heeeeeeey, Mibird, If you like wine, have you tried sangria?

>>3711290
>>Heeeeeeey, Mibird, If you like wine, have you tried sangria?

>>3711290 (OP)
>Heeeeeeey, Mibird, If you like wine, have you tried sangria?
Hmmh...Since Dressrossa is a Spain expy does that mean that Sangria was made in Dressrossa?
Man,AU Oda doesn't wanna stop with leaving subtle clues about Flashman origin.
Also maybe i'm wrong,but before going full gothic didn't Mihawk use to wear Hawaian shirts?

>why did i bother writing other suggestions?

“Heeeeeeey, Mibird,” you chirp, like the avian Mibird is. “If you like wine, have you tried sangria?”

Mibird seems to have taken to being called Mibird with an utter lack of care, which you find simultaneously inspiring and relieving, mainly because you like your head attached to your neck. Not enough to not call him Mibird, though. “I’ve heard of it.”

“But have you TRIED it?”

“... No,” he shamefully confesses, clearly guilt-ridden over this travesty of good taste. Well, okay, maybe he just sounds bored. That simply means he’s hiding it well. What a guy,

You crack your knuckles. “All righty then. Looks like it’s... *s a n g r i a o’c l o c k*.”

Klaus makes an odd whimpering noise as Mibird arches an eyebrow, but you’re too busy flagging down the waitress to care.

>Roll 1d100 best of 3 to see if you can subconsciously turn your Logia off and get drunk on sangria

Rolled 70 (1d100)

>>3711328

Rolled 6 (1d100)

>>3711328
DRUUUNKKK

Rolled 56 (1d100)

>>3711328

Rolled 35, 77, 64 = 176 (3d100)

>70, not bad

>Conversation topics during drinking binge?

>>3711342
>Which of the 4 emperors is strongest
>What is the weirdest place you've ever been to?
>How did you meet Zolo?
>What is the single most baffling thing that has happened to you? I once fell overboard in the east blue and found a mermaid... somehow
>What are the other Shichibukai like? I've only met 3 so far

>>3711342
>>What's Shanks secret?

>>3711342
>who was greatest swordsman before you?

>>3711342
>Do you use that tiny sword for shaving, or the giant cross one?

>>3711350
His real hair colour is pink, he’s actually Coby’s dad.

>>3711345
Supporting

>>3711342 #
>Sooo....How is your love life Mibird?Do you have your magic cheaty eyes set on some swordwoman?

And this is how we get swordad Mihawk, by having Flashy unknowingly playing 4D chess against him,and sending him right
Into the arms of Flashy's mom because she is the best Swordwoman in the world.

>i’m a giant sword-nerd, ama

“So teeeeell me,” you wheedle, halfway through your third glass of delicious, fruity wine (it’s no Pink Flamingo, but you’re man enough to admit that other drinks are tolerable), past tipsy but not quite into drunk. Yet. “Which of - of the Emperors is the strooongest?”

“A ridiculous question,” Mihawk disparages. He has a jug all to himself. “It’s like apples and oranges. Are you including their crew in the matter? The size of their territory? The-?”

“Whitebeard!” Abs’ voice drowns him out, as the guy raises his own glass. “Pops is the strongest, no doubt!”

Ignoring the fact he proooobably shouldn’t be calling the dude Pops any more, you squint at him. “Reeeeeally? I mean, he’s kinda old... does he even fight any more?”

“Does he-?!” Fireplace splutters, but Mibird butts right back in.

“He does still fight, although considering the size of his crew, they obviously do far more of it than him. That said, I would disagree that he is ‘the strongest’.”

You stare at him, curious. “Then...?”

“Most likely... if we are talking the individual, rather than the entire crew, then the strongest is surely...”

You lean in closer, intrigued.

“... anyone but Red-Haired Shanks.”

.............

That’s not a real answer.

Seeing your glare and smirking at it, Mibird elegantly shrugs. “It’s been a long time since any of the Emperors fought each other. And of course, those who go to fight them tend not to live to tell the tale. So who knows?”

“... But Red-Haired is definitely the weakest?”

“Correct,” Mibird says, looking you dead in the eye. “His first mate is excellent at keeping him alive, whereas the man himself can’t even protect his own limbs.”

“Wow.” You scratch your cheek, thinking about all the dire warnings you heard about the Emperor back in class. “I thought he was on par with them all...”

“Perhaps he’s decent when sober. I’m not sure if anyone’s ever seen it happen.”

Daaaaaaang. The more you know. “And, uh,

>How have you heard of Zolo?
>What are the other Shichibukai like?
>What’s the single most baffling thing that’s ever happened to you?
>Other?

>>3711420
>>What’s the single most baffling thing that’s ever happened to you?
given grandline insantiy tis is prob a good one

>>3711420
>>What’s the single most baffling thing that’s ever happened to you?
INB4 "This dumbass marine walked up to me, challenged me to a fight, somehow activated Conquerors, tried to steal my knife as it was shoved into his guts, then invited me to drink."

>>3711420
>How have you heard of Zolo?

>>3711428
That was pretty much going to be the answer, actually.

>Mibird: (oh my seasus, it’s a blond, marine mini-shanks)

>>3711420
>What’s the single most baffling thing that’s ever happened to you?
Who cares about Lolonoa or information we can get just by saying "I don't think Moria, Doffy and Boa will enter through that door right now".

>>3711428
>I HAVE CONQUERORS HAKI?!!!

>>3711439
Oh god we really are, way too strong attachments to our crewmates, all the hakis, gets drunk way more than he should, insanity seems to follow us around... I'm calling it now, our Moms dad is also Shanks father making shanks our uncle by being moms half brother, which makes Big Mom Shanks Step-Mom

>>3711462
You forgot the part in which Zolo and Sanji from the future shapeshift into Shanks and mom and gave birth to Flashy by scission via sword, like a starfish, that's why Shanks lost his arm.

Shanks as our uncle even explains why we are so short despite our parents, grandpa was a shorty and so are we

>>3711445
>I HAVE CONQUERORS HAKI?!!!
More like "What's "CONQUERORS"?"

>>3711499
Flashy is from the grandline, he would know what conquerors is, hell he knew what the other hakis were

When you think about our future in the Marine and the only thing you can see is:
>Becomes an Aldmiral/Big boss of the marines and changes a lot of laws so the world is a better place.
>Becomes a Not-revolutionaire and kills IM and the WG (except that guy that slapped the shit out of Carlos with a mace).

>>3711462
And if your grandfather’s a D, that also makes Shanks a D.

Mihawk would be unsurprised by that.

>prep flashy saw goth mibird and mibird put his middle finger up at him

“Aaaaand,” you continue, because Shichibukai 20 Questions is a rare pleasure, “what’s the single most baffling thing that’s eeeever happened to you?” You hiccup, before glaring suspiciously at your glass and then draining it. Take that! ... Refill now.

“Not a thing... more of a person,” Mibird murmurs, pulling an expression of distaste. Then his gaze, fully sober, fixes back on you. “Although if it were limited to ‘recently’, I must say that a low-ranking Marine challenging me to a spar, revealing his Haki, and then attempting to claim my blade is... somewhat unusual.”

“Not for this idiot,” Klaus mutters from beside you, downing his own drink and looking like he wants to sleep, or die, or both. You swat his arm.

“Ignore Klaus! So.

>If I asked for it nicely, would you give it to me?”
>Is the tiny knife actually, like, for shaving or something?”
>Do people not challenge you often, then?”
>Other?

>>3711512
>that guy
You mean your cousin?

>>3711489
Ultimate quest goal: kill Shanks for making your mother (and thus you) short.

>>3711527
>>Is the tiny knife actually, like, for shaving or something?”

>>3711527
>>Do people not challenge you often, then?”

>>3711527
>>Do people not challenge you often, then?”

>>3711527
>>Do people not challenge you often, then?”
>>I mean, with how strong you are, they're missing out!

>>3711527
>>Do people not challenge you often, then?”
>>By the way liking the Sangria, am looooooving it

We are gettgin drunk with Dracul Mihawk... Tashigi is gonna die of jealousy, we must plan her funeral

Heading out, update soonish.

>>3711527
>>If I asked for it nicely, would you give it to me?”

>>3711548
Right after slapping our shit and screaming at our idiocy for challenging him to spar. Then Klaus mentions the Conqueror's Haki.

>>3711527
>>Is the tiny knife actually, like, for shaving or something?”
Still want to know if he uses the actual cross-sword for that, though. It'd definitely be funnier, both in practical terms and the fact that he deems his facial hair a better opponent than scrubs from the Blues.

>>3711658
>It'd definitely be funnier, both in practical terms and the fact that he deems his facial hair a better opponent than scrubs from the Blues.
And he'd probably be objectively correct too.

>>3711706
>His facial hair instinctively uses Armament Haki any time it's going to be damaged, so Mihawk has to use Armament-coated Yoru to even attempt to shave

>>3711740
his hair really is pink, it just looks black cause hes constantly filling it with armament

>>3711750
Shanks and Mihawk both have pink hair, but are keeping it secret from each other.

>tell me mooooore

"Do people not challenge you often, then?”

Another shrug. "If you mean 'do they verbally challenge me', yes. As for bring a physical challenge... rarely. Most of my challengers are weaklings and fools. A good number are both."

You point at yourself, questioningly.

"You're both."

... Rude.

"That said, I can see that your win over Roronoa wasn't a fluke." (You keep your mouth shut that he tripped, looking innocent.) "It should be interesting to see where you are in three month time."

>So what's your connection to Lolonoa, then? Sounds like you know him?
>Are you drunk enough for me to convince you to teach me something cool?
>So what are you doing around these parts, anyway?
>Other?

>>3711822
>>So what's your connection to Lolonoa, then? Sounds like you know him?

>>3711822
>>So what's your connection to Lolonoa, then? Sounds like you know him?

>>3711822
>>So what's your connection to Lolonoa, then? Sounds like you know him?

>>3711822
>So what's your connection to Lolonoa, then? Sounds like you know him?

>>3711822
>>So what's your connection to Lolonoa, then? Sounds like you know him?
>>Are you drunk enough for me to convince you to teach me something cool?

>>3711822
>>So what's your connection to Lolonoa, then? Sounds like you know him?

>>3711822
>>So what's your connection to Lolonoa, then? Sounds like you know him?

>>3711822
>So what are you doing around these parts, anyway?
>Also if you want to ask me something at some point you can too.

>>3711916
>Also if you want to ask me something at some point you can too.
To be perfectly honest, Mihawk gives precisely zero fucks.

>the tluth is leveared

"So what's your connection to Lolonoa, then? Sounds like you know him?"

Mibird eyes you for a second at 'Lolonoa', before pouring another sangria from his jug. "We met in East Blue, and he impressed me with his potential. As simple as that."

Woooooooow. Okay. Does that mean - did Lolonoa spar with him as well? And what was Mibird doing in East Blue, anyway? Does Mibird know - yeah, of course he must know Zolo plans to be the strongest swordsman. What is this, some kind of 'raise your own rival' program? Zolo's YOUR rival, you called dibs on each other!

>D'ya think he'll kill you one day?
>So I guess hearing he lost his sword must not have been good news for you, huh...
>... Zolo has Armament now. It was really dumb.
>Other?

>>3711947
>>D'ya think he'll kill you one day?

>>3711947
>>... Zolo has Armament now. It was really dumb.

>>3711947
>zolo has Armament now, it was dumb
First we need to make fun of sword-bro/lival infront of his senpai

>he's my rival, whenever he gets around to beating you I'm going to kick his tushy and put him in jail, but he's MINE not your rival, you are the stepping stone mihawk

Gotta assert DOMINANCE

>>3711947
>>... Zolo has Armament now. It was really dumb. just copying me like that, really stole my thunder on that one. (chuckle at our brilliant joke)

>>3711965
Basically I want to let mihawk know that we KNOW that zolo will surpass him, but we're still going to be the greatest challenge roronoa will ever face

>>3711962
>>3711967
I hate it. Support.

>>3711967
BOOOOOOOOOOOOO
....
>Support

Rolled 11, 9, 39 = 59 (3d100)

VOTE IS STILL OPEN BUT ALSO
>Roll 1d100, best of 3 for continued drinking

>>3711967
... support

Is zoro stronger than luffy with his armarment?

Rolled 63 (1d100)

>>3711984

Rolled 73 (1d100)

>>3711984
YEET

My first roll ever!

Rolled 100 (1d100)

>>3711984
are those rolls for abs mibird and klaus to hold their booze?

>>3711947
>>... Zolo has Armament now. It was really dumb.
>It was like, we-we were fighting a Lightning Logia and I used Ahr-muhment to stop lightning, it was relly cool but then, Zolo said "I want a piece of that" and did the exact same thing, making me look less cool...

>>3711996
THE LEGEND
HE YEETED IT

>>3711996
hey look, its that crit i spent on the spar 30 in game minutes ago

>>3711996
Guess we're getting kidnapped.

>>3712003
we gettign kidnapped just so Mibird can see a drinking contest between us and Shanks

>>3712003
What, no. It's our 100. This time, we do the kidnapping.

>>3711996
No, those were background Strawh-

...

>>3712003
Yep.

>>3712003
We're just going to cling to mihawk as he leaves for his next adventure and not let go, mihawk with no fucks to give will just keep going with us attached to his back, klaus will be forced to follow after our dumbass and force firefist to come, and our goons will follow because they have nothing better to do

>>3712012
Klaus will follow cause he has to make sure flashy doesn't die and Abs cause he has to see this shit to believe it

>>3712008
.....

hmmmmmmmmm

>BE KIDNAPPED!!!¡¡¡
>BE DOING OF THE KIDNAPPING¡¡¡!!!
>(>>3712012) ur my Mibird now (hic)
>OTHER???¿¿¿

>>3712010
The real question is whether Klaus is going to kidnap us while we are vulnerable to keep us safe, or mihawk is going to take us for nefarious zolo related purposes.

>>3712019
>ur my Mibird now (hic)

>>3712019
>>BE DOING OF THE KIDNAPPING¡¡¡!!!
A nice change of pace

>>3712019
>BE KIDNAPPED!!!¡¡¡

>>3712019
>ur my mibird now!
As much as I want to kidnap him it's just not feasible unless he lets us, and then it's not a kidnapping but just pretend and I will not stand for it!

>>3712019
>BE KIDNAPPED!!!¡¡¡
I rather this be less Flashys fault and more a Warlord being eccentric

>>3712019
>ur my Mibird now (hic)

>>3712019
>>ur my Mibird now (hic)

>>3712037
But it's always flashys fault, even when it's not his fault it's still his fault, somehow

>>3712044
>something explodes in West Blue
>IT WAS FLASHY'S FAULT

>>3712019
> ur my mibird now (hic)

I can definitely see mihawk coming along for the hell of it and leaving whenever he pleases

>>3712048
>So thats what happened to the first cannon ball!

>>3712053
Well we are still in the island till we get picked up day after tomorrow, so this is more we hug mihawk and dont let go even as he gets on his boat and sails away

>>3712019
>BE KIDNAPPED!!!¡¡¡

>>3712071
C'mon guys, it's tradition

>be normal villager
>go for a night out at the pub
>holy crap, there's that new Shichibukai drinking here
>he's not causing trouble or hurting anyone, relax a little
>some marine gets people involved in a drinking contest
>getting more and more drunk
>ANOTHER SHICHIBUKAI
>he and the marine go to kill each other or something holy shit
>both come back alive and... start drinking again?
>marine gets progressively more drunk and starts clinging to shichibukai's coat
>other shichibukai and marine's friends have given up
>Shichibukai casually strolls out with drunk marine wrapped around his back like a koala
>rest of them follow in a panic
>have no idea what just happened
>grand line weirdness scale 8/10

>>3712019
>BE KIDNAPPED!!!¡¡¡

>>3712080
Locking and tallying here.

5-4 for ur my Mibird!

This is great for me, because guess where Mibird's going? I'll give you a hint. It's a two word name, and the initials are E and L.

>>3712099
oboy

>>3712099
... oh boy, we gonna get a first row seat to the shit show

>>3712099
Enel's Lawnchair?
Mihawk has no idea why it crashed onto his ship, smoking like a meteor, nor why someone would intentionally make a chair so gaudy.

Yet even he cannot deny the chair's comfort. ...After a bit of redecorating, of course.

>>3712099
OH
BOI

I've genuinely forgotten what E L is.

>>3712133
Enies Lobby, shit kicking into high gear

>>3712133
Eddys Lobby or something like that

>>3712133
Hey D'Enies! Lead tham mean into Lobby and throw him out. He has no place in here!

>>3712099
>Smoker’s face when he receives a poster for “Thunder God” Arthur

>>3712135
>>3712136
>>3712143
OH

>ONE HUNDO

"... Zolo has Armament now. It was really dumb." The side of your face thumps down on the bar table, your head surprisingly heavy. "Just copying me like that, really stole my thunder on that one. Heeeeeh~" You chuckle dazedly at your hilarious joke. You're so funny. So, soooo funny. Yup.

You're sort of vaguely aware of a hand - Klaus? - reaching out to nudge your head. "Y'all right, Prettyboy?"

"Ngggghhhh," you reassure the voice.

Ooh, big pretty yellow eyes peering at you. All bright an'... an' yellow.

"Perhaps you should put him to bed," say the eyes.

You yawn at that, drowning out the boring talk between Klaus and Eyes. Birdy eyes. Mibird. My bird. Yes. Yoooour bird. Bird with swords. Gotta... Gotta be yours. Yes.

"My bird..." you mumble, cheek squished against the worryingly sticky wood ofnthe tabletop, fingers itching to... to......

Everything fades pleasantly away.

×××××

Everything unpleasantly returns.

>Roll 1d100, first 3
1 best of
2 middle
2 worst of

Rolled 7 (1d100)

>>3712147
Hehe...

Rolled 14 (1d100)

>>3712147

Rolled 58 (1d100)

>>3712147

Rolled 89 (1d100)

>>3712147

Rolled 90 (1d100)

>>3712147

>>3712145
>inb4 they didn't manage to get a clear shot and have to send Flashman to take Arthurs photo for a bounty poster

Rolled 78 (1d100)

>>3712147
My bird

Rolled 89 (1d100)

>>3712147

Oh boy...
Smoker: Hey Klaus, just calling to make sure things are ok after the mission.
Klaus: Yes.
S: So, how's the brat.
K: Yes.
S: ...what happened.
K: He challenged Mihawk to a spar, he almost vivisects him. Instead of fainting like a normal person, he activated Conquerors Haki, then tried to legally steal one of Mihawks blades and invited him to drink sangria.
S: ...
K:Then Flashman got drunk, clinged to Mihawks coat and they both fled into the night.
S: ...
[Somewhere in marinerford]
Extra! Extra! Commodore from the Marines shoves 1000 ciggars inside his mouth and lits them with a fire logia.

Rolled 1 (1d3)

>>3712147
Weird, thought I typed the roll in right.

>>3712156
We'll be just like Spiderman!

>>3712169
Oh good, that’s best of. 58 ain’t that bad

Rolled 28 (1d100)

Just trying out rolls

>>3712170
Do not invoke the man of spiders. Our name is Flash, and we're part of a military. Do you want to get our legs blown off?

Rolled 32 (1d100)

... is ace coming with us to eines?
Because if so, shit is going DOWN

>>3712230
I can't wait

>>3712227
Spider-Man is a loser. Does he have knife-legs? Is he a lumberjack? No? Pathetic. Flouncing around, pretending to be a spider when he doesn't even have the right number of limbs. Poseur.

>58, purdy average

Oooooooh your head ow ow ow

"Nmfghklsdgh," you complain, although it's muffled by... cloth? Not a bedsheet. Too thick. Blegh.

Cracking your eyelids open is... ugh, awful. You wince, pushing your face closer to the cloth, which is...

Wait.

Very slowly, you peek your eyes open, lifting your head slightly.

The cloth is... Mibird's coat? Which is bundled on the bottom of - a very cramped boat. A coffin-shaped one. And sitting upright, not far in front of you, looking perfectly regal and relaxed, one leg crossed across the other knee, is...

Hm. Mibird's coat. Mibird's boat. Maybe other things of Mibird's ending in -oat. Buuuut. Question: why are YOU here?

You don't end in -oat.

"... whezmi?"

Mibird tilts his gaze to stare pointedly at you, uncaring of the beautiful dawn sky, or the fact you're apprently now at sea. Yep. "Are you finished drooling on my coat?"

>...... yez.
>Noooooooooo?
>Didju... Didju kidn'p me?
>Other?

>tashi is gonna be soooooo jealous

>>3712273
>sorry about that
>...did I get kidnapped again?

>>3712273
>Oh god not again...

>>3712273
>>...... yez.

>>3712273
>>...... yez.

>>3712273
>did I get kidnapped again, is it Wednesday already?

>>3712273
>>...... yez.
>>Internal crying

>>3712273
>Why does this keep happening?

>>3712273
>Sorry about that.
>...oh god not again.

>>3712273
>is it wenseday ma dudes

>>3712291
Support

>>3712305
>>3712273
Shit forgot to link

>>3712273
>He gave us use his coat as a blanket
Super Sword Dad acquired.

Rolled 27 (1d100)

>>3712330
Does that make us zoros brother?

Rolled 43 (1d100)

>>3712273
Rolling for how much Mibirb comes to regret kidnapping us

Rolled 48 (1d100)

>>3712334
Rolling for how much Shanks comes to regret Mibird kidnapping you.

Rolled 37 (1d100)

>>3712334
Low numbers? Interesting...rolling to see how happy Mibirb becomes that he kidnapped us.

Rolled 2 (1d10)

>>3712334
>>3712338
As expected from Miowl, he barely gives a fuck.

Rolled 6 (1d100)

>>3712334
>>3712338
Okay. So he doesn't really regret kidnapping us nor is he really happy that he did. I honestly should have expected this.

...Rolling for how batshit everything gets now that Harry and Mihawk are sailing together...possibly into the New World.

>>3712336
Oh my god. I just had a thought. We're his successor's rival. Did he kidnap us to give to HIS rival to train?

Rolled 18 (1d100)

>>3712334
Does Mibirb planning to raise his own little Shanks?

>>3712341
Everything is on fire

Rolled 19 (1d100)

Rolling to figure out how much klaus and smoker hate this

Rolled 32 (1d100)

>>3712345
Really, it's more like he just figured you weren't letting go and didn't care enough to make you... and then when he tried, you were clinging too tightly to his coat... so he threw his coat (and you) on the floor of the boat.

But being Mibird's gift to Shanks is a terrifying thought, because you are worryingly reminding Mibird of him.

>>3712352
They've gone past panic into an emotionless void of doom.

>>3712356
>Shanks I bring you a gift.
>Really what is it?
>Its an even weaker version of you. Take it away from me its stupidity is infectious.

>>3712356
Random question boss,
Would tashi trade wado for a chance to meet mibird?

Rolled 34 (1d100)

Okay. New Idea.

Rolling for Smobosses freak out. The Higher it is, the more explosive, the lower, the more he's a picture of calm and patience until he gets his hands on Flashman's neck.

>>3712317

"..... yez." You squint back down at the coat. Black. Fancy red patterned sleeves. It's... probably worth more than you make in a year. Or five years. "Did I get kidnapped again? Is this a Wednesday?"

"........" Mibird intones, loudly and pointedly.

"Um." You like at the dried patch on the sleeve. "That, uh. That'll wash out."

You peek up to see Mibird looking at you with resigned disappointment, like at a puppy who pissed on his rug. Or drooled on his coat, really. ... You're much cuter than a puppy, though. And housetrained!

"... Sorry? Um. Why am I... here?"

Mibird looks up to the sky, small clouds drifting along a lazy breeze. "Why are any of us here?"

"....... Okay, let me rephrase. Why did you kidnap me?"

He shrugs, laconic. "Why not."

>?????

>>3712364
Don't tempt me. Please, please don't tempt me.

>be sengoku
>get call from garp, who got call from smoker
>mihawk's kidnapped a (drunk) commander
>some ex-marine, infantry and Firefist Ace have followed them into the New world
>you can't even figure out why this has happened or what the p.r. fallout will be
>dammit mihawk you were one of the well-behaved ones
>what's firefist doin there, anyway?
>get another call
>mihawk gave the commander to red-haired and then left
>wt absolute f
>red-haired is training him???
>commodore smoker demanding his return or he'll invade red-haired's territory???
>garp won't stop laughing???
>the surgeon of death is now hurtling towards red-haired too???
>gotta retire from this shit

>>3712368
No, because he's pirate scum and doesn't deserve to be the greatest swordsman in the world.

>>3712383
But I want to tempt you. Imagine Shanks attempting to teach Flashy how to drink real booze, followed by Flashy making them cupcakes filled with rum. Imagine the Strawhats meeting Shanks while Flashy is in an apron. Imagine Smoboss screaming at Shanks to give him back his son.
>So Mibirdy where are we headed? Do you have snacks? Can I bake a cake? Other annoying/endearing Flashman words

>>3712383
>No, because he's pirate scum and doesn't deserve to be the greatest swordsman in the world.
Fucking Kek. Oh man, say that to Mihawk's fucking face, I dare you Tashigi. Oh boy she really needs to realize that a persons occupation has jack shit to do with sword abilities.

>>3712383
... So, where are we headed?

>>3712383
>>Check to see whether drunk-Flashy managed to bring everything along this time, and find out if the other members of your group came along too.

>>3712398
I mean
>... So, where are we headed?

>>3712392
She's not dumb enough to say it to his face, and she recognises he's the most skilled in the world... she just thinks swords shouldn't be used for 'evil', so no matter how good a person is with a sword, if they're a bad person, they don't deserve a title like world's best, because they're shaming the title rather than bringing honour to it.

Having corrected about 50million typos in this post, I'm going to bed. Thank for playing, good night, and don't roll any more 100s! Or else.

Of course, Mihawk is a Shichibukai rather than an active pirate, so that's not TOO bad, but she's obviously had a less than stellar opinion of Shichibukai lately too, so...

>>3712409
Sweet QM dreams

Rolled 81 (1d100)

>>3712409
Night

Rolled 45 (1d100)

>>3712383
>"Hey, train me while we're going to the next island"

>>3712409
sleep tight rolling for mihawk giving us haki lessons

>>3712383
>"So... What do you usually do while traveling the sea?"

I can't think of how unbelievably boring sailing on a floating coffin has to be.

>>3712710
Well with nothing to distract us, it might be a good chance for hardcore Haki training.

Never written before, here we go.

>Snow falls like angel shit as Smoker awoke from his desk with a low huff emitting a thin line of smoke to escape his lips, another day another bit of smoke in life’s impenetrable smog of days we call life.
>Smoker had fallen asleep at his desk, again, a habit that a few months back he would have never let himself do.
>But honestly, he just didn’t give a shit about any of that looking professional crap when white beard himself is almost wheezing at his door.
>And he has spent all night trying to find some way to stop the inevitable destruction of his office, and the island because of some geezer who is upset that his son can now do something with his life to possibly help people.
>He is still scum though, so it’s about as likely as Flashman being rear-admiral.
>The door to his office is burst open, he doesn’t even bother to lookup from his desk as he puts two cigars in his mouth out of habit.
>Tashigi, for the past couple days has been on edge. Oh dear sea, he merely chuckled at his own pun...
>He hated puns, and humor in general. The white marine felt his eyes involuntary twitch.
>”Did you feel it too sir?” The sword woman lips quiver as the word leave her.
>Half and half man looks up at his second in command.
>Her hair is a mess, her glasses are smudged and she has bags under her eyes. All in all she looks relatively normal for a monday morning.
>”If you mean the stress of having to find a way out a mess we have no way out of than yes.”
>Tashigi sighs “Sir, we need Flashman back.”
>Smoker is silent for a moment, before he leans back in his chair.
>”Why? It’s quieter with the idiot gone.” Smoker says as he gets out of his chair.
>”Sir I-
>”I mean look at all the progress we’ve made. We’ve doubled our productivity with him gone.” smoker begins to slowly pace around the office.
>”Sir-
>”Sure it means I have to do the paperwork alone and it takes twice as long, and I have nobody to vent to in order relieve my anger, but it’s fine.” Smokers voice starts to rise.
>”S-
>”It’s not like I’m trapped in my office for weeks just doing paperwork! I haven’t slept on something that isn’t wood for weeks!” Smoker began to yell.
>”And that idiot gets to have a damn joyride to give pirate scum money to put their hands inside another piece of pirate scum to save said scum!” Smoker began to walk towards his now slightly concerned second in command.
>The woman of bend metal took a step back as smoker approached.
>”I’ve been making puns in my head Tashigi, Puns!” Smoker yells his cigars somehow staying in place.
>”You’re damn right we need that idiot back so I have someone to yell at who deserves it!” Smoker finishes with a huff before walking back to his desk.
>Tashigi stared at smoker as he sat down and looked at his unfinished paperwork.
>”Smoker, we gotta get flashy back!” Tashigi yelled.
>For once smoker agreed completely with someone.

>>3712383
You know I though you anons were fucking insane for challenging him but I take it all back holy fuck.

>Fireplace going to see Luffy burn EL to the ground
Amazing. Also I didn't realise that EL *could* be even more of a clusterfuck than Canon but here we are.

Rolled 63 (1d100)

>>3712383
Rolling for Silvers chem knowledge to make engagement ring

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JKi85QNr7zo

Rolled 33 (1d100)

>>3713728
Rolling for Flashy's chem knowledge to make cocktails.

Rolled 51 (1d100)

>>3713794
Rolling for Flashy's COCKING knowledge to make cocktails.

>are we there yet? ... are we there yet? ... are we there yet? ... can we stop for mcdonalds? ... are we there yet? ... miiiiibiiiiiird i'm huuuuuuungry~

You awkwardly pat yourself down to make sure all your stuff is present and correct, while edging yourself even closer to the side of the boat. Just in case you need to vomit.

"Sooo..." You squint up at him. "Where are we headed?"

"Ennies Lobby."

Wat.

"Gosh. That's, uh. Not really where I wanted to be."

"Hm." Mibird looks like he's less than invested in your opinion. "Perhaps you should have considered that before you started clinging to my coat and refuses to remove yourself."

... Maybe... you should stop getting drunk? ........ Nah. "Oh." That does sound like the sort of thing you'd do. "Thank you for not, uh, stabbing me?"

"I didn't wish to stain my clothing, with you so close," Mibird informs you. "Besides, you're very light."

At least he's not calling you fa- waaaaaait, is he implying you're some kind of midget?!

>I'm actually very tall. Compared to many people. Just so you know.
>Where are my friends?... And Fireplace.
>Why are yo- we, going to Ennies Lobby?
>Other?

>>3713802
>>Where are my friends?... And Fireplace.
>>Why are yo- we, going to Ennies Lobby?

>>3713802
>Why are yo- we, going to Ennies Lobby?

>>3713802
>Why are yo- we, going to Ennies Lobby?

>>3713794
>So to make a martini, you take vermouth and gin and an oli- why are you holding tabasco sauce? Stop that.

>>3713802
>I'm actually very tall. Compared to many people. Just so you know.
Manlets, when will they learn!
>where's are my crew

>>3713808
Support

>I've been waiting so loooong for thiiiiis

Ignoring the horrible tall man and his horrible tall... tallness... you instead move on to matters less likely to get you stabbed. "Why are yo- we, going to Ennies Lobby?"

Mibird looks at you properly at that; his mouth curving into a grin of wicked sharpness. "Oh, a simple matter - I wish to look at a sword that's being delivered there. A meitou."

Oooh. Shiny. You prop yourself up more, the smooth motions of the boat thankfully not making things worse. "Really? Cool. Which one?"

The smirk widens. "Wado Ichimonji."

>????!!!!!?????!!!!!

>>3713825
ah so this is how the quest ends

>>3713825
>Damn it sis you were suposed to keep it not send it away. (Iner panic! She wouldnt simply give it up!)

>>3713825
>stare at him while processing this information
>"Excuse me here for a minute."
>turn around and walk two steps to the other side of the coffinship
>call Tashigi
Sis got some explaining to do.

>>3713825
>TASHIGI!!!!!!!!

WE WILL END YOU!,WE'LL REPLACE ALL YOUR WETSTONES WITH THE CHEAPEST WE CAN FIND, WE'LL HIDE YOUR SWORDS IN SMOBOSSES UNDERWEAR DRAWER, WELL REPLACE YOUR SWORD OIL WITH SHOE POLISH, WE'LL BURN YOUR SWORD PORN COLLECTION!

THIS WILL NOT STAND!!!!!

>>3713825
>>3713831
+1

>>3713831
Supporting, but with the addition of immense dissapointment.

>>3713832
For this travesty and breach of trust I feel like we should, as a higher in rank officer, lock her personal sword away for a week and make her walk around with a broom handle in its place instead.
The only punishment worse would be if we somehow manage to compel Wado to speak its mind to her instead.

>tfw oneechan makes decisions without your input

Your heart lurches and thuds down, down into your stomach, as you stare at Mibird in bewildered incomprehension. Your brain carefully lays his words out for you several more times, until it's finally understandable.

"Excuse me for a minute," you calmly tell him. Then, under his maliciously amused eye, you pull a sleepy Mr Speedy from your coat, and wriggle backwards to the far end of the coffin. Boat. Thing.

She pick up after several rings. "Flashman?"

>tashigi what the shit what the absolute shit i mean seriously i can't believe you did this what the shit
>... Where's Wado.
>Hi! I'm incredibly pissed off right now!
>Other?

>>3713843
>tashigi what the shit what the absolute shit i mean seriously i can't believe you did this what the shit
Your paperwork help privileges are revoked forever and you can only use broom handles if you want to train your swordsmanship for a week

>>3713843
>>... Where's Wado.

>>3713843
>>... Where's Waldo pardon I meant Wado.

>>3713843
>>tashigi what the shit what the absolute shit i mean seriously i can't believe you did this what the shit
And when/if she asks what we are talking about,
>>... Where's Wado.
in most cold voice we can muster in our hungover state

>>3713843
>>... Where's Waldo pardon I meant Wado.

>>3713848
The meitou Waldo was forged a century ago, and quickly stolen by the then world's greatest swordsman and thief, Sandiego Carmen. Both mysteriously vanished thereafter, and despite many rumoured sightings, not one verified appearance has ever been recorded...

NEXT TIME, ON 'GRAND LINE'S UNSOLVED MYSTERIES'

>>3713851
>Sandiego Carmen
>not Caramel Charlotte Sandiego
Wasted opportunity baka desu sempai

>>3713843
So, as a sub arc to all the Robin drama we have to get a hold of wado and duel Zoro and lose.

>>3713843
>>... Where's Wado.

>>3713856
>duel Zoro and lose.
Pathetic

>>3713865
I kinda hope we lose as well. Just so we can fight our rival at full power later.

>>3713865
Considering we’re going to be restricting ourselves to swordsmanship, it’s a good possibility.

>>3713856
>and lose.
No.
I believe in Zolo being able to get it back legit way where we both give it our best. Anything less would be dishonorable. Also, Mibird will be watching probably.

>>3713848
>>3713843
support

>i honestly couldn't believe you didn't ask to see wado while you talked to her before. she'd already sent it away, although there was a chance she'd have tried to recall it if you'd convinced her...

You breathe in. Out. "Where's Wal- Wado."

Silence.

Then, "I sent it off shortly before you got back from the sky island." Her voice is blunt. "And yes, I would have told you except you got... odd about it when you came back."

>Odd?! You - Tashigi, I- why didn't you keep it?!
>So what, you just expected me to find out when the papers reported some Marine is using it?
>You should have told me.
>Other?

>>3713869
>be zolo
>ultimate showdown with your rival at ennies lobby
>muddafukkin mihawk watching, what the hell, gotta make this good
>draw your swords
>your rival looks you dead in the eyes
>he pulls out a pistol and a cannonball
>THAT LITTLE SHIT REEEEEEEEEEEEEE

>>3713878
>>You should have told me.

>>3713878
>>You should have told me.

>>3713878
>So what, you just expected me to find out when the papers reported some Marine is using it?

>>3713878
>>Odd?! You - Tashigi, I- why didn't you keep it?!

Don't want to come off like "waah you should have told me waaah", and seriously, it seems out of character for her not to have kept it.

>>3713878
>...I am so disappointed in you.
>hang up.

>>3713883
>>3713880
>>3713878
>>>Odd?! You - Tashigi, I- why didn't you keep it?!
yeah switching to this

>>3713878
look on the bright side, after she pulled this bullshit we no longer have to take her opinion on this matter into consideration.

>>3713878
>tashigi, I understand why you did what you did, but I am just so incredibly disappointed that I don't know what to say, I don't want that sword because of a tragic backstory or anything but because it's the link between myself and the most important man in the world to me, my rival who's booty I will kick

>>3713885
Come on, now isn't the time to act like a bitch.

>>3713878
>Odd?! You - Tashigi, I- why didn't you keep it?!

>>3713890
Throwing a shitfit and yelling is more like acting like a bitch. She already told us her reasoning, we already told her ours. She disregarded us completely, so there’s nothing more to say.

>>3713883
+1

>>3713878
>I trusted you to take a good care of it in my stead.
>I am so disappointed in you right now, you have no idea.
>hang up

>>3713878
>Odd?! You - Tashigi, I- why didn't you keep it?!

Tashigi will ask us how we even found out and all we will say is a little birdy told us.

>>3713878
>>3713881
>>3713901
I'll swap to this.

>hi i'm Flashman i like to give people gifts and then complain when they do exactly what they said they would do with it

"Odd?! You - Tashigi, I- why didn't you keep it?!"

"Keep-?" She sounds confused. "Flashman, I've told you before why I want to reclaim all the meitou used by pirates. So they can go to responsible wielders, who'll use them decently! I already have Shigure, what would I do with Wado? Hang it on my cabin wall like some - some cheap decoration? She deserves to be used!"

"But - you're learning to dual-wield, right? Why couldn't you have kept her for that?"

You ignore Mibird's obvious interest as she answers. "I don't *need* another meitou. Shigure is important to me, but I'm not stupid enough to think that someone else couldn't make better use of Wado than I could. And seriously, if this were any other sword - Flashman, this is obviously about Roronoa. What was I supposed to do with it?!"

>?????

>>3713908
>A little birdy told me
>... Okay, a big bird told me.
>A very very very big bird told me.
>You wouldn't believe how big this bird is, Tashigi.

Rolled 100 (1d100)

>>3713914
Supporting

>>3713918
What a big wasted crit on a joke post

>>3713918
...>>3713918
Does that count?

>>3713920
Sadly no, because I didn't ask for a roll.

But I will throw in some big bird jokes somewhere. (He's 6' 6" by the way.)

>>3713913
You could have at least told me... also I have recently been told that I must join the sword tournament in Shabaody in 3 months or I am screwed. Look we can talk about this later? Right now I need to talk to you and smoboss, shit went weird again

>>3713913
Deflection time!
>WHO is she going to?

oh fuck Kaku is gonna have Wado isnt he?

>>3713913
>You stupid, humble, sword loving... ARG!!!
>Of course you deserve it you, you BAKA!
>Why do you think I gave it to you in first place!
We did give it to her right?
>Now they will give it so some shmuck using third grade wet stones and off brand polish!

>>3713913
>>3713924
+1

>>3713933
It's not that she doesnt think shes worthy of it, she already has shigure and doesnt want another meitou, just wants to make sure they are used by those she percieves as just

>>3713913
>"You could have just kept it safe while I decided what to do with it? Shigure is important to you, but Wado is important to *me*, Tashigi. Getting it was one of the first times I felt like I accomplished *something*, and I *thought* I could trust you with holding on to it."
Or something to that effect.

>>3713913
>>3713923
>You could have at least told me... also I have recently been told that I must join the sword tournament in Shabaody in 3 months or I am screwed. Look we can talk about this later? Right now I need to talk to you and smoboss, shit went weird again
didnt green text my vote before

>>3713936
I'll +1 this. She was too busy thinking about herself. Isn't flashy good enough for one?

>>3713940
>>3713913
Let me link this

>>3713940
Flashy ahs stated multiple times he doesnt want legendary blades and only wants his children, complaning about this like that makes no sense here. The betrayal here is not that she gave the sword away, its that she didnt tell us

>>3713913

>Tashigi... i knew you wouldn't be happy, but i didn't want to lie to you, because i genuinely care about you and i don't want you to hate me. So i told you the truth. I told you how much it meant to me. But then you just brush it off as me being brainwashed? I'm not stupid, sis. I may act stupid, and sometimes i may have genuinely stupid moments, but i'm not stupid. I can judge someone's character. I know i'm an asshole, i know that you're frustratingly naive and i know that the strawhats are good people, regardless of whether you want to believe it or not. That said, if you really sent it away before i got back from the sky island, i can't really blame you for anything. I didn't know what kind of person Zoro was before then, and it was my mistake to have given you that sword in the first place.

Rolled 51 (1d100)

>>3713945
Changed my vote
Supporting this

>>3713940
We decided to not use it early on (because OBVIOUSLY our Ka-tan is superior in all aspects).

I will also acquiesce that we didn't actually tell her to keep it or store it, we just kind of gave it to her. Different priorities at the time. We were the same as her, just thinking that the Strawhats were Generic-Loot-And-Pillage Pirates.

>>3713945
>and it was my mistake to have given you that sword in the first place.
Ouch.

>>3713913
>>3713934
>>3713945
I'll change to this if we cut out the part about the strawhats being good people. Can't say that over Den Den.

>>3713945
Support

>>3713913
REVOKE HER CANDY PRIVILEGES

>>3713945
I also like this, sort of? but agree that we probably shouldn't just say that the strawhats are good people out loud.

What a complicated response this is turning out to be.

>>3713945
not ok with saying that the straw hats are good people over den den

>>3713958
It's coming eventually lads, flashy is destined to go rogue.

>>3713913
>He isn't actually a bad person
>I know it's seems weird and I understand where you coming from
>You sending wado away It just... You should tell me
>...
>Tell Smobos that curently Im traveling with Mibird torwards Enies Lobby
>I will call you guys later
I dont want to gilt trip her or acuse her of wrong doing. Mostly beacouse she is right

>>3713958
FIIIIINE

Supporting
>>3713945
Without the "straw hats being good people" part

>>3713962
+1

>>3713927
:) :) :)

>>3713948
Yeah, I dunno why people are like 'you should have held onto it for me', you straight up gave it to her. Hell, someone had previously been voting to throw it into the sea. There was definitely no 'this is mine but you can keep it for a while' going on.

>>3713958
Well, it's a complicated situation.

Mibird's loving it, by the way.

>>3713927
>Become Arthur
>Fight CP9
>Wait, Arthur why are you fighting marines and why are you here
>I got drunk and someone stole wado
>Blame CP9

What zolo doesn't know can't hurt us!

>>3713961
I really want a Doffy meter to see how close we are to unleashing Flashman Alter

btw do we have our Pirate Arthur disguise with us? cause if not i kinda wanna remake it and keep it stored in a thunder dial

ALSO VERY IMPORTANT NOTE

YOU DON'T HAVE YOUR ARTHUR OUTFIT

Do you want to stop off at Water 7 to do some very quick shopping while you're there? You've actually only got one set of clothing so it's understandable if you do.

And no, you won't run into Strawhats on W7 of you go there.

>>3713970
yes to water 7 stop, get some more cannonballs our arthur costume and maybe some books on physics, biology and electricity

>>3713933
Support

>>3713970
>Yes

Also we should run into Franky and chemistry up some Super Cola

>>3713970
>yes

>>3713965
Something like this, then?
>"Okay... Add this to the very long list of my own fuck-ups, then. I'd have preferred if you had kept Wado for me, Tashigi, but I can understand if that wasn't communicated correctly. Regardless, I just wanted to confirm what I was told by... someone else. A someone else that would know about this kind of thing, but I'm not sure if he's cool with me just talking about him especially cause he's like a few feet to my right, but maybe this counts as talking about him and I'm a few seconds away from being cut up into very small cubes? Or maybe not? I think he's enjoying seeing me verbally flop around like a land-locked Sea King."

>>3713973
again its not that she doesnt think shes worthy, she just thinks it makes more sense to give it to someone else when she already got shigure

>>3713980
She should've done the zolo flippy trick

>>3713972
Shoping!

>>3713983
I guess you mean the one with Kitetsu, but all I can think of now is Zolo doing the water-bottle flipping thing as part of his training. I hate it.

>>3713983
>she does
>she fails
>whelp, not like I can dualwield now, may as well send Wado away
>something something but the future refused to change

>>3713990
You are now imagining Zolo flipping a water bottle and dabbing just as it lands right side up.

>>3713913
>>3713953
>>3713979
Shit, I guess i'm changing my vote again. This is pretty good.

>>3713990
>inb4 we have to make the bottle flipping thing into a street attraction to earn some money to buy clothes

Also Qm, do we even have Flashman's flamingo wallet on us? Or does Smolboss have it

>>3713970
Do we have money or do we need to borrow from Mibird dad

Rolled 75 (1d100)

Rolling for allowance from Mifowl dad

>>3713993
He is now fired as eternal rival. No references will be given.

>here we gooooooooo

"Tashigi..." You close your eyes and bite your lip as you try to find the right words. "I knew you wouldn't be happy, but I didn't want to lie to you, because I genuinely care about you and I don't want you to hate me. So I told you the truth. I told you how much it meant to me. But then you just brush it off as me being, I dunno, brainwashed? I'm not stupid, sis. I may act stupid, and sometimes I may have genuinely stupid moments, but I'm not stupid. I can judge someone's character. I know I'm an asshole, and I know that you're frustratingly naive, and I know that - well. That said, if you really sent it away before I got back from Skypiea, I can't really blame you for anything. I didn't know what kind of person Zoro was before then, and it was my mistake to have given you that sword in the first place."

Tashigi is silent for a long, pregnant moment. "Okay," she finally says, quiet and calm. "Leaving aside that you called me sis... I don't think you're stupid. Or an asshole. But if I'm naive, then you're naive too, because you spent all of three or so days with the Strawhats and went from hating Roronoa to finding him an honorable rival and calling him by his first name.
"I'm sure he has his good points, because everyone does, but at the end of the day, he went from bounty hunter to a willing criminal. That was his own choice, and if one of the consequences of that choice is that it put him in a situation where he lost something he's been using to hurt innocent people and Marines? Then I can't say I'm sorry for him. And I guess maybe it was your mistake for giving me that sword, but it was my mistake to think you-" She cuts herself off, bitter now. "Never mind. I have actual work to be doing, so was that everything?"

>?????

>>3713996
You... never had one? Where did I say you had one?

>>3714004
As with at the pub in Matchstick Village, you have your name/number/etc and they'll charge it to your account that the Marines will honour from your pay. That said, if you want to try and get birddad to pay, you're welcome to try.

>>3714032
>no, tell smoboss I've been kidnapped by mihawk and that I'll be back in a little while, now good day! *gacha*

>>3714032
I'm currently on a boat with Dracul Mihawk on our way to Enies Lobby, no idea where klaus and the minions are. Also let smoboss know that there might be Big Mom pirates presence in this area of the Grand Line, not sure why they were here, we couldn't beat them without killing them

>>3714046
Support