>>5085315

After these words all the "r"'s began to disappear from the names of Lorcal, in all the maps, in all the signs the "r" disappeared and got changed into "Local" and a new stranger appeared in the forest. But not from a world of magic and wonder but a world of faith, mud, disease and superstition, the world of XIIIth century Europe.
Of course you have understood that you are the Local Lord, you will embody the brave man who will fight against all this magic and disrespect of realism. But first we shall ask, where are you from ?

>England : as the son of a lord from England you speak French, of course, the only civilised language of nobility in this XIIIth century, as a scion of the Normans you are accustomed to deal with Aglo-Saxons, Cltoids and many others dealing with stupid and brutish races like orcs, trolls and other should not be to complex to you. You will teach them to pay their taxes on time. You will have a bonus to tax other cultures and to adapt to strange customs.
>France : as the son of a lord from Champagne, in France, you speak French, like everyone. You are a brave warrior, skilled in cavalry warfare who served in the Crusades and fought the perfidious Flemish, you have thus perfected cavalry tactics and know that a good "chevauchée chargeante" is enough to disperse any army. You will have a bonus when you lead cavalry into battle (even if your men do not still have a full harness).
>Holy Roman Empire : as the son of a lord from the Rhineland you speak german. You have learned to navigate the strange politics of the Holy Roman Empire and not any legal system can be more complex than this. You will get a bonus to navigate the strange feudal system of this new world.

In this quest you will have 5 stats :

-Combat : wich represents your martial skills, useful in single combat and strategy, from 1 to 100
-Intrigue : wich represents your social skills useful for plots and social situations, from 1 to 100
-Rulership: wich represents your hability to rule your subjects useful to implement your decisions and be obeyed, from 1 to 100
-Piety : wich represents your faith in the Almighty Lord Jesus Christ, god protects, remember this, it will be your best defense against magic, from 1 to 100
-Mudcore : wich represents your memetic power and the extent and power of your field of realism, potatoes and tomatoes will rot, magic will not work, common tongue will be replaced by local dialects and unpractical armor designs will become weak. Be careful, not enough mudcore and you will be overwhelmed by your fantastical enemies, but if you have too much mudcore every household will speak mutually unintelligible languages and every body of water more than 40 centimeters deep will become impassable !

>>5085316
WE'RE A SON OF INGERLAND, PROUD AND TRUE

>>5085316
>>France : as the son of a lord from Champagne, in France, you speak French, like everyone. You are a brave warrior, skilled in cavalry warfare who served in the Crusades and fought the perfidious Flemish, you have thus perfected cavalry tactics and know that a good "chevauchée chargeante" is enough to disperse any army. You will have a bonus when you lead cavalry into battle (even if your men do not still have a full harness).

>>5085316
>>Holy Roman Empire : as the son of a lord from the Rhineland you speak german. You have learned to navigate the strange politics of the Holy Roman Empire and not any legal system can be more complex than this. You will get a bonus to navigate the strange feudal system of this new world.

Everyone was out to get us, everyone is still out to get us. Just like home!

>>5085316
>France
Fuck ze English

>>5085316
>England : as the son of a lord from England you speak French, of course, the only civilised language of nobility in this XIIIth century, as a scion of the Normans you are accustomed to deal with Aglo-Saxons, Cltoids and many others dealing with stupid and brutish races like orcs, trolls and other should not be to complex to you. You will teach them to pay their taxes on time. You will have a bonus to tax other cultures and to adapt to strange customs.

>>5085316
>Holy Roman Empire : as the son of a lord from the Rhineland you speak german. You have learned to navigate the strange politics of the Holy Roman Empire and not any legal system can be more complex than this. You will get a bonus to navigate the strange feudal system of this new world.

You wouldn't happen to have run Princess Paladin quest would you QM?

>>5085316
>>Holy Roman Empire

>>5085316
>England : as the son of a lord from England you speak French, of course, the only civilised language of nobility in this XIIIth century, as a scion of the Normans you are accustomed to deal with Aglo-Saxons, Cltoids and many others dealing with stupid and brutish races like orcs, trolls and other should not be to complex to you. You will teach them to pay their taxes on time. You will have a bonus to tax other cultures and to adapt to strange customs.

LETS SCORE SOME FOCKIN GOALS!

>>5085316
>>France : as the son of a lord from Champagne, in France, you speak French, like everyone. You are a brave warrior, skilled in cavalry warfare who served in the Crusades and fought the perfidious Flemish, you have thus perfected cavalry tactics and know that a good "chevauchée chargeante" is enough to disperse any army. You will have a bonus when you lead cavalry into battle (even if your men do not still have a full harness).

Fuck ze English

>>5085316
>England or Holy Roman Empire

>>5085315
>>France : as the son of a lord from Champagne, in France, you speak French, like everyone. You are a brave warrior, skilled in cavalry warfare who served in the Crusades and fought the perfidious Flemish, you have thus perfected cavalry tactics and know that a good "chevauchée chargeante" is enough to disperse any army. You will have a bonus when you lead cavalry into battle (even if your men do not still have a full harness).
I claim this point for France !

>>5085316

>>France : as the son of a lord from Champagne, in France, you speak French, like everyone. You are a brave warrior, skilled in cavalry warfare who served in the Crusades and fought the perfidious Flemish, you have thus perfected cavalry tactics and know that a good "chevauchée chargeante" is enough to disperse any army. You will have a bonus when you lead cavalry into battle (even if your men do not still have a full harness).

el local lord : THERE CAN BE NO COLOR ONLY THE MUD !

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>>5085319
>>5085337
>>5085375
>>5085419
>>5085611
>>5085713

Unfortunately no, it is my first quest.

>>5085943
>>5085946
>>5085952
>>5085985
>>5085993
>>5086002

Well France won ! Montjoie Saint Denis !

You are the third son of a small Lord from Champagne, you have fought bravely during the crusades and against the Flemish with great names such as Charles de Valois or Gaucher de Châtillon. You were travelling with a small escort to Paris to demand justice to the the King Philippe IV over a boundary dispute. Like every local lordling you cannot physically move without some men at arms or experienced scouts and trackers after all. Of the first kind you have only two, Godefroi de Trifouillis, an old and experienced knight serving your father since you were born and Bohémond d’Autrelieu, a young and enthusiastic gentleman always itching for a fight.
Your experienced scout and tracker Ancel le Purineur helps to scout ahead of your path.
You were accompanied too by another traveller, who is he ?

>Enguerrand Lefourbe : a jurist from the Sorbonne in Paris and a man knowledgeable in both Law and Theology. He is unfortunately quite soporific when he speaks and you pity his students.
>Tolomeo Pelagatti : a fat Lombard banker who you would trust only has far as you can throw him. But he is knowledgeable about money and knows more about economics than your simple formula “more taxes equal more soldiers”.
>Father François : Your confessor, a brave and pious priest who would do better to eat less and not to sleep with young maidens. But he is a cheerful fellow and a loyal man of your father, and one of the only one who could give you the holy Sacraments.
>Brother Ponce : an overzealous Dominican who is a member of the fairly recently created Holy Inquisition. He was travelling with you and has no loyalty to you but this kind of man can always be useful.
>Brother Louis (de Pierredargent) a brave knight of the Templar order and one of your good friends. Pious and skilled with a blade he has the impression of being particularly lucky. Even this travel to a new world seems to have saved his life.

>>5086009
>Brother Ponce : an overzealous Dominican who is a member of the fairly recently created Holy Inquisition. He was travelling with you and has no loyalty to you but this kind of man can always be useful.
DIEU ET LE ROI

>>5086009
>Tolomeo Pelagatti : a fat Lombard banker who you would trust only has far as you can throw him. But he is knowledgeable about money and knows more about economics than your simple formula “more taxes equal more soldiers”.

>>5086009
>Brother Louis (de Pierredargent) a brave knight of the Templar order and one of your good friends. Pious and skilled with a blade he has the impression of being particularly lucky. Even this travel to a new world seems to have saved his life.

We’re already military specced let’s go all in

>>5086009
>Brother Louis (de Pierredargent) a brave knight of the Templar order and one of your good friends. Pious and skilled with a blade he has the impression of being particularly lucky. Even this travel to a new world seems to have saved his life.

>>5086009
>>Brother Louis (de Pierredargent) a brave knight of the Templar order and one of your good friends. Pious and skilled with a blade he has the impression of being particularly lucky. Even this travel to a new world seems to have saved his life.
100% automatic taxation and obviously at least one of the people accompanying us must have gout. Wait a minute ... where is our group of smelly, illiterate, racist, superstitious, cowardly, stupid, incestuous and so sweeping peasants that have at least an inch or more of mud on their rags and skin ?! They are needed for make our levy that we will no doubt use them as cannon fodd --- righteous soldiers for strikedown all manners of magical beasts, sorcerers, dragons and demons!

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>>5086012
>>5086023
>>5086024
>>5086029

Do not worry, everything comes in due time.

>>5086027

Well, since there is a majority it will be brother Louis.

You where passing nerby Soissons when it struck, a white light, a white blinding light that blinded you and your horse, it was a white so pure that you had never seen it before. Believing that you have finally met your Maker you fell asleep. You were awaken by the sound of the voice of your men, the young knight, Sire Bohémond d'Autrelieu, who is shaking you.

-Messire, messire ! You are alright ? By Saint Denis, since I was born and baptised and never witnessed such events... We all seem to have fallen asleep, and the trees are not in their place...

You look around you while you see Brother Louis helping your oldest retainer. All the landscape has changed but you are clearly still in a northern French climate. Your horses are still sleeping nearby and you see your scout and tracker trying to awaken them. You are confused first, and your head hurts, the terrain is muddy, just like after a heavy rainfall and you see that all your livery is covered by mud. Well at least you haven't got a cold. Looking around you you see that the trees have changed place but the climate is still the same... Have you been knocked unconscious by a vile felon ? It is less than likely. You do not know what to do or better you know. Once everyone is awake you get on your knees and start praying.

-My Lord, we have sinned, you sent us a just trial, we will abide by it, give us the courage to fight to the death. Pater noster Pater noster, qui es in caelis sanctificetur nomen tuum adveniat regnum tuum fiat voluntas tua sicut in caelo et in terra. Panem nostrum quotidianum da nobis hodie et dimitte nobis debita nostra sicut et nos dimittimus debitoribus nostris et ne nos inducas in tentationem sed libera nos a malo. Amen.

It is the only latin you know, oh, and by the way, you are illiterate too, after all it is better when you forge false evidence for a plot to say that your subordinates are to blame because you cannot read. Once all your men joined you in prayer, terrified or emboldened by the next trial you send your brave Ancel to scout ahead, after all it is his job. He comes back once you have awaken all the horses, visibly panicked. He runs to you screaming like a madman.

-Messire ! Messiiiiiiire ! A saracen ! A saracen in an armor of steel ! There is no chainmail only steel ! He is moving towards us from the road to the north !

A Saracen ? On French lands ? Such arrogance, how dares he ? How do you react ?

>Charge ahead with your men and strike down the swine ! Deus Vult !
>Try to sneak towards it, maybe we can take him by surprise, it is not very chivalric but it can be a good strategy.
>Try to speak to it, maybe he knows more about the land.
>Other (write in)...

The first proposition to have 3 votes will win.

>>5086053
>Charge ahead with your men and strike down the swine ! Deus Vult !

Strike it down with righteous fury!

>>5086053
>>Try to speak to it, maybe he knows more about the land.


>Godefroy
>Peasant scout
>Messire, un sarasin !

Are you french, QM? Because don't think that reference is well known abroad.

>>5086053
>Other (write in)...
Capture him !

>>5086053
>Try to speak to it, maybe he knows more about the land.
Violence can always be the answer to failures in diplomacy.

>>5086065
>>5086053
+1
Very clearly a Saracen Spy!

>>5086053
>Charge ahead with your men and strike down the swine ! Deus Vult !

Cowards! A Saracen, defiling French land? Suffer not the infidel! CHARGE!

>>5086053
>>Charge ahead with your men and strike down the swine ! Deus Vult !

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>>5086055
>>5086060

Yes I am. So sorry if I make sometimes some mistakes in English.

>>5086065
>>5086072
>>5086079
>>5086081
>>5086084

Saracens defiling French land ? Maybe they will sack a village, or a monastery ! Death to this scum ! You order your men to follow you and press your horse ahead. You draw your steady axe and begin to approach but when you come to see the enemy you are even more disturbed than by the cries of your scout. While Ancel was coming to you the saracen was joined by two more warriors. Your skilled eyes try to spot any weakness in them.

The first thing you see is that these three persons have matching armor, like it was made by the same artisan, their protections are engraved with the depiction of a fire, surely the fire of hell ! They all all covered in steel, it is doubtlessly far more effective than your chainmail, but these fools do not wear helmets ! No helmets at all, any blow to the head can kill them easily. Maybe they trust their strangely oversized pauldrons to protect them, this enormous amount of metal on each shoulder seems to restrict the possible movements of their heads but maybe it is their way to protect this vulnerable point.

You look closely at them and you almost gasp in shock ! The first man is effectively a Saracen, his pitch black head must mean that he is from Ethiopia or Barbaria, cursed lands that you remember from when minstrels sung you the "Chanson de Roland". Yes, these lands in the south of the Holy Land see no sun at all so their inhabitants become black like the perpetual night of their native country.
But the second one is even more outrageous, smaller than the two others and with long hear you see to it's armor that it has clearly feminine forms ! It's a woman ! A woman in armor ! Hah ! Even the Englishmen are not as stupid to follow a woman into battle ! Impure each month, fat each year she cannot be of any use in an army. Maybe they read too much legends... One more proofs that we should let reading to the clergy. The woman was sitting and clearly felt sick.
The third man was a proper knight, with short blonde hair and a beard he seemed to be a worthy opponent, but he was doing a strange thing, he was putting a tube in his mouth and smoke came out of this burning tube ! A demon ! The sulphur that was inside him was burning ! What an horror ! The forces of hell have seem to have united against you !

They have not yet managed to spot you, they seem to be helping the woman who is sitting in the middle of the road, clearly indisposed. All the three are armed with surprisingly large swords, these weapons seem very unwieldy to you.

You watch your men a last time, it is your choice now :

>Continue to charge with your men, death to these abominations ! (Maybe order to capture one or some of them)
>Challenge one of them into single combat, it is an honourable way to begin the battle.
>Maybe we shall talk with them after all, to learn more about why they are here.
>Other (write in)

Same rules as the last time, first three votes will win !

>>5086102
>Continue to charge with your men, death to these abominations ! (Maybe order to capture one or some of them)

Why would we be honorable infidels who dare step on French land?! Their party consists of a demon, a women, and a Saracen knight, they are unholy!

>>5086102
>Continue to charge with your men, death to these abominations ! (Maybe order to capture one or some of them)

Capture the silly women, she is clearly half mad, in armor and traveling with ruffians!

>>5086102
>Challenge one of them into single combat, it is an honourable way to begin the battle.
Lowering yourself to the level of demons is the worst mistake a faithful servant of the lord can make. We live in honor and we will die in honor!

>>5086102
>Continue to charge with your men, death to these abominations ! (Maybe order to capture one or some of them)
No capture ! DEATH DEATH DEATH

>>5086102
>>Continue to charge with your men, death to these abominations ! (Maybe order to capture one or some of them)

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>>5086104
>>5086107
>>5086111
>>5086120
>>5086141

When you saw such horrors you saw red. Rallying your men with a mighty war cry you spurred your horse forward and screamed with righteous fury.

-MONTJOIE ! SAINT DENIS ! Smite down these heathens men !

And you charged, axe drawn while your faithful retainers lowered their lances. Unfortunately you were still quite far away and the ennemy had the time to regroup. The woman tried to stand while the saracen knight ordered the others to stay behind him. In a tongue who seemed to be a strange mix between a bastardised version of english, french and german that strangely you could understand a bit (even if you lost most of the meaning of what he said his gestures spoke for him) he seemed to order the others to stand behind him while he drew his gigantic sword and took it in one hand. At least they had the bravery to try to fight against a cavalry charge.
With his other hand he formed a fist that he turned towards you and he said something like.

-Edos, Lord of Justice, shield me from your enemies !

And the miscreant opened his hand while you were only some meters away. You did not know what he expected from his imprecation but he seemed confused by it, like it didn't work as intended. His confusion soon transformed into panic when you continued to charge and raised your axe. His heavy sword was to slow to parry the blow and you opened his head like a calabash, your axe sending blood, gore brains and bone fragments everywhere. He was very dead.

The blond demon tried to raise his sword and began to roar a mighty battlecry.

-FOR JUSTI... grglglglgl

He got run through the neck by the lance of your faithful Godefroi, the demon with his oversized sword being clearly no match for a veteran man at arms in full mail. The knight templar, brother Louis, knocked the female warrior quite quickly, she was unwell and fell into some mud. But bravely she raised her hand towards you and tried to raise. She pronounced some words while her hand was turned to you.

-Edos help me see the unjust, detect the evil in their hearths.

You wondered if she was mad, if it was so easy to see if someone is evil or a crook you would not have played dice with this angevin knight during your expedition in flanders. It was hard to tell if someone was a crook, only if he was a jew or a lombard of course. You felt a bit of tingling in your hearth but the woman... The woman.. It was another matter. She began turning around and to have convulsions like a possessed person. She began to try to catch her head in her hands and screamed like a woman giving birth. You were quite shocked by the spectacle and taken aback. What to do ? But before you could act she said in a very afraid voice.

-Abomination... Who... Who are you... What are you ?

>>5086153

Your men looked at you, maybe it was the time to let these wretches know your name. And what to do with the woman ?

>Kill her, she is clearly a witch
>Throw her into a river with her armor, if she drowns she was clearly not a witch, if she manages to swim she is a witch so kill her
>Ask her some questions, then kill her, she is a witch
>Capture her for information, she can be useful and killing a fair maiden is not very honourable
>Ask her some questions and let her live after this, she can tell everyone how you destroyed the wicked
>Other option (Write in)

And do not forget to write your name and vote for the best name dear players.

>>5086155
>Throw her into a river with her armor, if she drowns she was clearly not a witch, if she manages to swim she is a witch so kill her

>>5086155
>Throw her into a river with her armor, if she drowns she was clearly not a witch, if she manages to swim she is a witch so kill her

Simple solution.

>>5086155
>Capture her for information, she can be useful and killing a fair maiden is not very honourable.

>>5086155
I don't speak French QM could you give us a historically correct name or two? That way it would be easier to vote.

>>5086199

With pleasure good sir. I thought more about memetic names but we can be "Henri du Tasdeboue" (Henry of the Pile of Mud) or "Guy de Loimbard" if you watched too mutch the Monthy Python or even "Philippe de Sombretrou" (Philipp of Darkhole) but if you want to be really hardcore into historical naming I think you can find quite easily lists of old french noble families even in wikipedia.

>>5086155
>>Capture her for information, she can be useful and killing a fair maiden is not very honourable

Godefroy is taken already, so I guess " [Name] de Montmirail" ? Henri ? Thierry ? Charles ? I'll let other anons decide.

>>5086155
>>Throw her into a river with her armor, if she drowns she was clearly not a witch, if she manages to swim she is a witch so kill her

Let s go on our muddy way to see even more mud and mud ! Of course tell our knight to beat to death anyone that attempts to touch the demons bodies or their things. Men could fall to the temptations of the devil, which this demons where no doubt servants of ! A land of servants of the devil and not honest frenchmen !! We must kill them all ! Mud for the mu- deus vult !

>>5086206
>Charles de Vallée Verte.
I hope I didn't misspell.

If we are going hard on the «Purge everything» policy our name can be «de Saint Pol» it’s a real place in France and it was a county.

>>5086155
Henri du Tasdeboue

>>5086155
>Ask her some questions, then kill her, she is a witch
>Etienne de Villeroi
A witch must burn! Water is not enough!

Well we have four names now and four propositions, the next anon to choose between these four will have his favourite name chosen. I will prepare the next chapter.

>>5086231
+1 it’s funny

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>>5086159
>>5086160
>>5086183
>>5086222
>>5086228
>>5086249
>>5086231
>>5086255
>>5086272
>>5086293

You shall not suffer the witch to live, but you are a fair nobleman and so you will give her a fair trial. You look at your brave retainers and ask to your scout.

-Have you found a stream or a river nearby ?

The scout nods, who was trying to tear off a gem from the sword of the black knight with his old rusty knife looked at you and nodded pointing to the east. You immediately reprimanded him.

-These wretches were trying to use magic, it can corrupt our souls ! Throw this away !

The man threw away the gem with superstitious fear and began to make the sign of the cross multiple times to protect himself from such infamy. The woman, now surrounded by your retainers, stayed silent and was shaking. You finally answered to her.

-I am Charles de Villeroi, knight of the realm of France, and you will be tried fairly for your witchcraft, start the ordeal of water. Seize her men, and throw her in the river, let's see if she floats like a duck !

The woman panicked and began to cry and your men almost felt sorry for her but she began to try to struggle and cursed them in the name of strange foreign deities. She was clearly an infidel. You did not understood everything but picked up a name she pronounced, an "Order" of some sorts that would avenge her death. You knew about the Templars, and the Hospitallers of course, and even this silly germans of the Teutonic order but you could not imagine that they would accept this kind of heretics in their midst. You frowned and thought a moment, maybe there is an entire ordrer of devil worshippers here, surely their extermination would please God and be sung by young minstrels for eternity. But enough questions, your men threw the witch into the water who was abnormally muddy and the judicial process demontrated that she was indeed not a witch, you saw her drowning and not managing to get up from the small river. Well, even if she was not a witch she was a heathen so she deserved it anyway.

Your men spoke between themselves while the young Bohémond pointed to a place nearby the road. He saw something. Approaching you could see a traveller in a long hooded cloak who was coming towards you on a horse. He spoke with the voice of an old man in the same tongue than the dead infidels.

-My lord ? Is it you ? And... These men... What happened ?

Everyone looked at you, what do you answer.

>Your lord ? Yes of course I am a nobleman, now tell me who you are old man before my patience runs out.
>Fear not old man, these demon worshippers are dead. But do not approach their bodies, they may be tainted.
>Tell me who you are first and remove your hood, I want to see your face.
>Other option (Write in)

First option with 3 answers will win

>>5086353
Ooops, typed Villeroi instead of Vallée Verte, sorry, since Vallée Verte won we can consider it changed.

>>5086353
>Your lord ? Yes of course I am a nobleman, now tell me who you are old man before my patience runs out.

>>5086356
If changing the name is not a problem, feel free to change it.

>>5086353
>>Fear not old man, these demon worshippers are dead. But do not approach their bodies, they may be tainted.

>>5086353
>Fear not old man, these demon worshippers are dead. But do not approach their bodies, they may be tainted.

>>5086353
>>Your lord ? Yes of course I am a nobleman, now tell me who you are old man before my patience runs out.

This has gone a bit darker than what the references hinted at. Not sure if it's the combat build, the crusade memes, or the use of "mudcore" which to anons here means grittier and darker settings.
I like your take on it as an anti-bullshit field of sorts. It has some fun potential.

>>5086388
I dunno, I found us going apeshit right after being isekaied and doing the witch trial and just all around ignorance to be pretty funny. Sure, it was dark, but it was funny. Honestly, despite the dark deeds it feels strangely lighthearted to me.

>>5086353
>Your lord ? Yes of course I am a nobleman, now tell me who you are old man before my patience runs out.

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>>5086373
>>5086377
>>5086379
>>5086381
>>5086388

I try to stay lighthearted but yes I suspect we will have a huge bodycount at the end of this quest. But to be honest it's up to you.
And yes Mudcore has fun potential, remember, the more grim and dark you act the more grim and dark your surrounding will become.

>>5086437

You answered quickly to the old man.

-Your lord ? Yes of course I am a nobleman, now tell me who you are old man before my patience runs out.

He looked at you like you spoke in a funny accent and nodded rapidly, removing is hood. He is an old man with white hair and a short beard, looking tired by years of work. His clothes and his horse are clearly those of a quite important person, not unlike the "baillis" that came sometimes to the court of your lord father. With a bit of fear in his voice he introduced himself and told.

-I am Oldfossil of Dustyplace, first councillor of the lord of Lorcal... Or... Local now...

He sights. You continue to look at him silently, while your men whisper between themselves to ask who is this strange man. Seeing him you understood that he is a political animal as we say. This kind of men occupy generally quite important functions at court and know the art of lies and deceit. But this man looks at you not only with an expression of fear, behind this fear there is some kind of... Hope ? Why ? He continues.

-My Lord, I do not know thy name but know that I am honoured to be in your presence. The old Lord of Lorcal, or Local has died, as you are his closest relative his Court Wizard decided to try to bring you to his realm with the help of...

You interrupt him brutally.

-A court wizard ? Who could be foolish enough to invite this satanic things in his court ! Was this lord consorting with demons ?

He looks at you in absolute fear and answers.

-He is dead, the court wizard is dead my lord.

You nod and you proclaim happily.

-Wonderful, the only good place for a wizard is the pyre !

>>5086490

He seems disturbed by this, you don't know why, but he shrugs it off. You begin to think about this, if you are the closest relative of this Lord of Local, or Local Lord, you can inherit the Local Lordship. Land is important, as a third son your chances of inheritance were always slim, but now you can become a rich and powerful man. Interesting, very interesting. But the man continues.

-As his last closest relative you are the inheritor of the Local Lordship and as his councillor it is my duty to serve you. I saw this blinding white light from the highest tower of the Local Castle and I rode as quickly as I could to try to accustom you with your new charge but I see that I have not been the first to encounter you. If I may ask, my Lord, why did your confrontation with...

He tried to look at the saracen with his skull split in two.

-With Sir Tyrone of Diver-City ended in such a duel and.. By the heavens...

You saw that he was quite afraid but very curious to ask.

-How do you managed to dispatch a twelfth rank paladin wielding the blade of Destiny, forged during a blue moon by the legendary dwarven sword maker Goìn Bedlate and another paladin that I do not recognise but who seems high ranking too ?

What do you answer ?

>They thought they were a match for me and my loyal men at arms, such arrogance, such hubris !
>Well, what good did his heretical butcher's cleaver did to him ? You shall not believe this kind of tales old man, artisans suffering with dwarfism do not work better.
>Paladins ? These people did not look like the companions of Charlemagne.
>Well they were not two but three, the other one was a witch, or looked like one, we had to throw her into the river to be sure, she was innocent.
>So I am your lord now ? And where is this Lordship of Local, were are we ?
>Your lord does not have to explain himself.
>I am your lord and I ask questions (ask any question you want, I will answer the three first questions)
>Other idea (write in...)

>>5086491
>Well, what good did his heretical butcher's cleaver did to him ? You shall not believe this kind of tales old man, artisans suffering with dwarfism do not work better.
>Paladins ? These people did not look like the companions of Charlemagne.
>Well they were not two but three, the other one was a witch, or looked like one, we had to throw her into the river to be sure, she was innocent.

>>5086491
>These fools did not wear helmets, even as they met our cavalry charge. Even their paltry prayers of protection to their heretical gods failed them.
>>Well they were not two but three, the other one was a witch, or looked like one, we had to throw her into the river to be sure, she was innocent.
>Paladins ? These people did not look like the companions of Charlemagne.

>>5086501
+1

>>>>5086501
+1

>>5086491
>Paladins ? These people did not look like the companions of Charlemagne.
>Well they were not two but three, the other one was a witch, or looked like one, we had to throw her into the river to be sure, she was innocent.

>>5086491
>They thought they were a match for me and my loyal men at arms, such arrogance, such hubris !
>Paladins ? These people did not look like the companions of Charlemagne.
>Well they were not two but three, the other one was a witch, or looked like one, we had to throw her into the river to be sure, she was innocent.

In all honesty, I would've preferred a Lord with a non-violent bonus, but anons chose violence and I don't see why violence won't be the solution to most of our problems, despite my natural tendency for peace and diplomacy.

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>>5086501
>>5086542
>>5086589
>>5086594
>>5086595
>>5086628

You sigh while answering this man. Clearly if you were illiterate he was not very educated.

-Well what good did his heretical butcher’s cleaver did to him ? You shall not believe this kind of tales old man, artisans suffering with dwarfism do not work better.

The old man answers like if you misunderstood him.

-No my Lord, I did not mean dwarves as « persons suffering from dwarfism » but as dwarves.

You look at him, not understanding.

-Dwarves ? What kind of dwarves ?

He looks at you, visibly lost, and tries to explain. The fact that you barely understand each other because of your different languages did not help.

-You know dwarves, like dwarves ! Small people, short, with beards.

You look at him.

-There is beardless dwarves, and I would not call every small man with a beard a dwarf.

He answered quickly.

-No, not men, dwarves, you know, dwarves living in the mountains, mining ore. They reproduce between themselves, they do not need humans for this. They generally live in their communities in the caves of the mountains but they can live amongst humans. Generally they live near our communities and work their craft.

You never heard of them. But your old Godefroi helps you by saying.

-Messire, maybe this man is speaking about the « cagots » I was campaigning in the Pyrénées with your Lord Father and we had to deal with these short people living in caves and being thrown away from villages by the locals. They are an inbred bunch, a cursed race, it is say that they are the descendants of those who accepted the teachings of the heretic Arius.

You thought for a moment, so this man was convinced that arianist midgets could make some good craftsmanship. You were not impressed. The councillor looked at Godefroi like a cow looks at a passing cart, he clearly did not understood anything at all. But you continued with a new question.

>>5086690
-Paladins, you talked about paladins, but these people did not look like companions of Charlemagne.

The man answered and this answer was like a knife in the chest.

-Charles who ?

By the Holy Virgin... This man did not know Charlemagne, where were we ? What does that meant ? It was terrifying. Charlemagne was known throughout all the Christendom and this man, a technically educated man, did not knew him. It made you realised how far away from home you were but, like a small child clinging to his last hopes you asked.

-You know, the paladins, the compagnon of Charlemagne, the twelves peers, Roland, Olivier, who fought at Ronceveaux covering the rear of the imperial army. Great warriors, even when the Archbishop Turpin was mortally wounded he had the time to kill forty saracens. And those who say it is false were not here at the moment of the battle and did not know anything about war.

You added that last phrase after you saw some scepticism on the face of the councillor. He answers.

-Brave warriors yes, close to the emperor they are. Yes... I guess, the Order of the Flame of Justice is a powerful organisation, a religious organisation dedicated to Edos, they work closely with the Mages Guild and the Adventurer’s Guild, they keep the peace and are loved by the people.

You frowned at him and he added in panic.

-W.. Well, by some people, but they are powerful, very powerful, the last time when a Lord killed a paladin it ended poorly for him. You must make this bodies disappear.

He spoke with a big of panic, and regret in his voice but you saw that he was quite accustomed to this kind of intrigues. You answered.

-Well they were not two but three, the other one was a witch, or looked like one, we had to throw her into the river to be sure, she was innocent.

You saw a look of absolute fear on the man’s face.

-Innocent ?!? You let her flee after accusing her of witchcraft... By the... You must catch her immediately ! She shall not be allowed to go to an outpost of the Order, they would teleport her and she will..

-Calm down, calm down old man, she was innocent, it means that she drowned.

-She drowned... What ?!? Does, I thought throwing her into the river was a kind of expression... I... It’s harsh.

He took a handkerchief from his breeches and began to wipe away some sweat. You answered.

-And it shall be harsh, we do not take those who worship the devil and consort with demons lightly. Now let’s go, to this "lordship of Local".

>>5086693

About the bodies :
>Order your men to hide the bodies by dumping them into the river. Let’s not antagonise these heretics, we are not numerous and they are an entire order.
>A knight does not have to hide from his enemies, he attacks on plain sight, take the heads of these heretics, we will put them on spikes at the entry of our new keep.
>Let the bodies rot here, no need to care for this petty problems, if they find who killed their brethren the paladins will have a far bigger problem.

And during the road :

>You ask questions about the Local lordship, what are your new estates, are they rich
>You ask questions about the geography of the land, where are we ?
>You ask questions about the organisations that you heard about, who is this Emperor, this Adventurers Guild, this Mages Guild (Choose one of those three please)
>You ask questions about Oldfossil, who is he, how long ago did he began to serve the Lord of Local.
>You ask questions about the liege lord of Local, if there is an emperor we shall, even if it is not likely because they do not know Charlemagne, in a corner of the Holy Roman Empire, and you know there is some middle ground between you and this monarch.
>You ask questions about the beauty of the local women.
>You ask questions about another topic that you choose (write in)

>>5086695
>Order your men to hide the bodies by dumping them into the river. Let’s not antagonise these heretics, we are not numerous and they are an entire order.

Being pious does not mean being stupid. We have killed the heretics and we shall yet kill more, but we must bide our time!

>You ask questions about the Local lordship, what are your new estates, are they rich
>You ask questions about the organisations that you heard about, who is this Mages guild a cabal of devil worshipers?
>You ask questions about the liege lord of Local, if there is an emperor we shall, even if it is not likely because they do not know Charlemagne, in a corner of the Holy Roman Empire, and you know there is some middle ground between you and this monarch.

>>5086695
>Burn the bodies, until we know the strength of these heathens a bit of precaution will be necessary.

>You ask questions about the Local lordship, what are your new estates, are they rich
>You ask questions about the geography of the land, where are we ?
>You ask questions about the liege lord of Local, if there is an emperor we shall, even if it is not likely because they do not know Charlemagne, in a corner of the Holy Roman Empire, and you know there is some middle ground between you and this monarch.
We need useful information.

>>5086695
>A knight does not have to hide from his enemies, he attacks on plain sight, take the heads of these heretics, we will put them on spikes at the entry of our new keep.

>You ask questions about the Local lordship, what are your new estates, are they rich
>You ask questions about the geography of the land, where are we ?
>You ask questions about the organisations that you heard about, who is this Emperor, this Adventurers Guild, this Mages Guild (Choose one of those three please)
>You ask questions about the liege lord of Local, if there is an emperor we shall, even if it is not likely because they do not know Charlemagne, in a corner of the Holy Roman Empire, and you know there is some middle ground between you and this monarch.

>>5086693
>Burn the bodies, until we know the strength of these heathens a bit of precaution will be necessary.
Then
>Order your men to hide the bodies by dumping them into the river. Let’s not antagonise these heretics, we are not numerous and they are an entire order.

>You ask questions about the Local lordship, what are your new estates, are they rich
>You ask questions about the geography of the land, where are we ?
>You ask questions about the organisations that you heard about, who is this Emperor, this Adventurers Guild, this Mages Guild (Choose one of those three please)
Emperor
>You ask questions about the liege lord of Local, if there is an emperor we shall, even if it is not likely because they do not know Charlemagne, in a corner of the Holy Roman Empire, and you know there is some middle ground between you and this monarch.

>>5086695
>Order your men to hide the bodies by dumping them into the river. Let’s not antagonise these heretics, we are not numerous and they are an entire order.

>You ask questions about the Local lordship, what are your new estates, are they rich
>You ask questions about the geography of the land, where are we ?
>You ask questions about the liege lord of Local, if there is an emperor we shall, even if it is not likely because they do not know Charlemagne, in a corner of the Holy Roman Empire, and you know there is some middle ground between you and this monarch.

>>5086388
Eh it s a meme. The whole point of the local lord meme is showing off on fantasy and slaughtering it with usually no counter against it, mages cant do spells and are put to the pyre, adventurers need to pay tools or are judged for the crime of entering a crypt, different races are killed on sight by the mob of dumb peasants, fantastical design of any kind applied to something collapse/break and it must be only done in a medieval real way. No bright colors only ones coated in mud, blood, dust and smoke of torches. And so on. Is ridicolous.

>>5086695
>A knight does not have to hide from his enemies, he attacks on plain sight, take the heads of these heretics, we will put them on spikes at the entry of our new keep.

>You ask questions about the Local lordship, what are your new estates, are they rich
>You ask questions about the liege lord of Local, if there is an emperor we shall, even if it is not likely because they do not know Charlemagne, in a corner of the Holy Roman Empire, and you know there is some middle ground between you and this monarch.
>You ask questions about the beauty of the local women.

>>5086695
>>Order your men to hide the bodies by dumping them into the river. Let’s not antagonise these heretics, we are not numerous and they are an entire order.

>
>>You ask questions about the Local lordship, what are your new estates, are they rich
>>You ask questions about the geography of the land, where are we ?

Many hearty keks had so far

>>5086628
I mean...I agree, but I didn't win the Character Creation vote.

>>5086695
>Order your men to hide the bodies by dumping them into the river. Let’s not antagonise these heretics, we are not numerous and they are an entire order.
>You ask questions about the Local lordship, what are your new estates, are they rich
>You ask questions about the geography of the land, where are we ?
>You ask questions about the liege lord of Local, if there is an emperor we shall, even if it is not likely because they do not know Charlemagne, in a corner of the Holy Roman Empire, and you know there is some middle ground between you and this monarch.

>>5086388
You must have realised this is a meme by now after defeating the barbaric warrior of "Diver-city". I looked up cagots on wikipedia and image search and am completely terrified

Full respect to the QM for introducing the concept of "chevauchée chargeante" and also French rhotic disappearance - I salute and commend you, QM

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>>5086707
>>5086731
>>5086940
>>5086955
>>5087045
>>5087100

Thank you good sir, I am happy that you enjoy this quest.

>>5087421

Thanks, i was raised with the books of Maurice Druon.

>>5087116

You dump the bodies in the river, after burning them. While they burn you have the time to speak with your councillor who answers your first question even if he speaks during a long moment and you are already well advanced on the road while he finishes.

Oldfossil answers quickly and efficiently but there is many informations that have to be said, he has the knowledge of a steward and you guess that it was his position in this lordship. He explains that the main export of your seigneury is crops. When you hear is precise numbers you can understand that he is a really good steward and that he knows his lands very well.
The terrain is made of woods in the south and grassy plains in the north and there is four villages around the main keep. Everything is watered by the small river Queste, a tributary to the river Tigie. There is more or less 1200 inhabitants in this lordship.

The most important village is Local, formerly Lorcal, who is populated by roughly 400 inhabitants, if we add the population of castle local (guards and servants), the isolated homesteads and small hamlets around it we get 650 inhabitants. Local is the center of the Local Lordship and it is protected by the castle of the Local Lord. It produces grain and other crops and some dwarves, or cagots, are producing beer here. There is even some cattle farming in the village and you understand that it is really rich.

Next to it there is the Nearby village, called Nearby because practically every time someone leaves local he says that he goes to "The nearby village you know" and so the name stuck. Nearby is on the same small river than Local and it shares it’s production of crops, but the proximity of the forest in the south makes it a home for many lumberjacks. There is a sawmill on the river. Nearby is populated by roughly 200 inhabitants, 300 if we add the hamlets and isolated homesteads.

The third village is called Otheron because when people travel somewhere than local they where always asked "You go to the Nearby village heh ?" and they answered "Yes, the other nearby village, you know other one" and the name, or a contraction of it, stayed. It is a small village of roughly 100 people living off the quite poor lands of the East of the seigneury. It is home to some farmers and shepherds.

Then comes the last village, called Forgotten because everyone always forgets about it and practically no one goes there. Apparently they forgot to tax it for 300 years and one of the main exploits of the old lord Random, your predecessor, and of councillor Oldfossil was to force them to pay taxes again. The village is deep into the forest, near a small like and the inhabitants fish or cut wood to survive. It is home to some 50 inhabitants.

>>5087517

The other 100 inhabitants live generally in isolated homesteads or farms scattered throughout the seigneury.

He says that last year taxes have given 2500 gold coins to the Lord and you interrupt him.

-2400 gold coins ?!? But... It's huge ! Where do you find so much gold ?

He seems dismayed.

-But, mylord, the gold coins are the currency of the land, even peasants pay in gold !

You look at him, not believing this, and your men seem absolutely stunned by so much money. How can they live with so much money and not be taxed ! But before you can answer one of those peasants come to you with a worried look. He addresses councillor Oldfossil in a tone full of despair.

-Councillor ! Wise Councillor ! And... You Sir... Help me ! Help me ! A misfortune ! An awful misfortune has struck my lands !

He looks like he will begin to weep in an instant. The old councillor says.

-Luckily I am with our new lord here. Who is...

-Charles de Villeroi.

-Yes Lord Charles de Villeroi, thank you my lord. He will address your problem immediately, tell us what happened.

The peasant who is quite richly dressed in bright colours says while he is kneeling before you.

-It is awful, we slept and have been awaken by a white blinding light ! And horror, all our corn is dead ! And all our potatoes too ! I thought it was goblins, the filthy little buggers love to do this kind of evil but no... No goblins on sight... And worse, I looked at my mirror, and look at my face.

You look at him and did not understood, he looks like a perfectly normal peasant, with a pockmarked face like a peasant who got the smallpox in his childhood but your councillor gasps and says.

-By the heavens ! What happened !

The peasant answers immediately.

-Yes ! My face ! It is horrible ! It appeared overnight ! And my child, my second boy has become a hunchback ! It's awful... We do not know what to do.

What do you answer ? Choose one answer.

>A peasant, with a mirror ? Where do you stole so much money ! Are you hiding it from the tax collectors ?
>Ghibellines ? I thought that the Guelphs had won a decisive victory over them at Campaldino ?
>By the holy cross, it looks like very dark magic ! Go pray to the Holy Virgin and to the local priest to cure you of your diseases, repent.
>Do not worry if it is the deed of any foul wizard we will slay him.
>Your son ? A hunchback ? May I see him.
>Other (write in)

>>5087518
>Do not worry if it is the deed of any foul wizard we will slay him.

>>5087518
>By the holy cross, it looks like very dark magic ! Go pray to the Holy Virgin and to the local priest to cure you of your diseases, repent.

>>5087518
>Ghibellines ? I thought that the Guelphs had won a decisive victory over them at Campaldino ?

>>5087518
>Ghibellines ? I thought that the Guelphs had won a decisive victory over them at Campaldino?

>>5087518
>Do not worry if it is the deed of any foul wizard we will slay him.

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This peasant has committed the grave sin of vanity, and he possesses an accursed looking-glass, a symbol of the Whore Of Babylon. He must be from the hated Brabant. Soon he will be filled with narcissism and demanding to learn to read and write in order to post about his daily life on the "Book Of Faces".
>Give him one chance for contrition, to surrender his sinful mirror and to repent his sins

(Also to everyone who voted for throwing the corpses into the river, our mudcore prowess negated the foul ensorcellement of the warband D'Iver City, but I am terrified now that we will contract mudcore dysentery. I hope none of these villages are downstream of the corpse river)

>>5087597
The bodies were charred first, unless ash is capable of causing dysentery.

The answer to all maladies to burn more witches

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>>5087611
(I hope this is true. I would not be too comfortable drinking from this ash / corpse river in either case)

Just looking at our history I hope the battle we fought against the perfidious Flemish was not this rout

https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Battle_of_the_Golden_Spurs

>>5087518
>Ghibellines ? I thought that the Guelphs had won a decisive victory over them at Campaldino ?
>By the holy cross, it looks like very dark magic ! Go pray to the Holy Virgin and to the local priest to cure you of your diseases, repent.
>Do not worry if it is the deed of any foul wizard we will slay him.

>>5087630
I don't think we'd be alive if we participated in that battle. Since we apparently fought alongside Gaucher de Châtillon among others we were probably at Bruges.

>>5087597
by the mannerisms of local lordism our characters are likely all to be immune by the real world diseases. Everyone else no lol. And due to the generalistic approach to take fantasy anything specific in a specific fantasy world is immediatly avoided (like diseases and plagues of that world), so local lordism win agains. Most of the peasants under us will probably begin to die in 2-4 days, and they will probably point at us as the ones that did this. Unless they become all dumb peasants before that, which is very likely with us interacting with them. We are here to have fun, this world will wither with us going around it funnily enough, as a unnatural magical force of medieval "realism" kek

>>5087518
>>By the holy cross, it looks like very dark magic ! Go pray to the Holy Virgin and to the local priest to cure you of your diseases, repent.

>>5087641
>>5087630

Jacques de Châtillon was at Bruges, and we are from late XIIIth century so Courtrai has not happened yet.
For the sake of precision we will say that our character has fought during the Battle of Furnes (1297) with Charles de Valois and we were fighting in Guyenne before that in 1296 with Gaucher de Châtillon.

And I am preparing the answer about Guelphs and Ghibellines since you voted for it.

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>>5087537
>>5087542
>>5087552
>>5087581
>>5087586
>>5087597

You are a wise man indeed but the bodies were charred, only the woman was thrown alive into the mud.

>>5087639
>>5087642
>>5087644

You were intrigued by the questions about this "goblins" and directly understood that this peasant must be talking about Ghibellines, those pesky partisans of the Hohenstaufens. So you asked very naturally.

-Ghibellines ? I thought that the Guelphs had won a decisive victory over them at Campaldino ?

The two men, your councillor and this peasant, watched at you like they saw you spiting fire. But then the face of the councillor brightened and it was like a great weight have been pulled from his hearth.

-Yes ! You know about the elven and gobelin wars, our men rode with the elves to send these pesky beasts back towards the most deep parts of the forest. But unfortunately they migrated and some of them are into the south. Bandits and marauders these men, they kill and plunder small homesteads or steal to survive.

You understood, even if your dialects were not perfectly understandable to each other at least this man knew something you knew and you answered.

-Ah, marauders, german and italian marauders in the forest... Well. We will need to deal with them in due time. And yes, of course old man, I know about the Guelphs and Ghibellines war, all the Christendom knows about them, they always wage war in Italy, they cannot stop. Even when the Guelphs won they began fighting between Black Guelphs and White Guelphs...

The councillor nodded enthusiastically, he seemed very happy.

-Yes, yes, we call them Light Elves and Dark Elves here but I can understand that you call them White or Black. We have some elves in the lordship, even some in your guard.

You nod, it was good news, even if you considered them subpar fighters the Italians could be good with Crossbows and after all you added.

-It is good, I always supported Guelphs myself you know, even if the war has ended, my Grandfather rode with Charles d'Anjou against the Ghibellines you know. Down with the Ghibellines !

You said the last phrase jokingly but they agreed, they were happy. And you were happy too, if these people knew about Guelphs and Ghibellines but not about Charlemagne it meant that we were actually nearby a faraway trading post of an Italian Merchant Republic. With a bit of luck you could enter in contact with some Genoese or Venetians. You kept that in mind. Then you asked the farmer and looked at the fields of strange rotten crops around you.

>>5087654

-These "Pautatoes" and "Korne" what are they ?

-They are crops mylord, these crops fed my family, now they are all dead... I do not know what we shall do....

It was the time to shine with a wise decision.

>If these crops are so vulnerable to dark magic I forbid the peasants of my demesne to grow them ! We shall grow wheat like everyone else !
>If these crops are so vulnerable to dark magic I forbid the peasants of my demesne to grow them ! And I forbid to grow turnips, I hate turnips.
>Fear not peasant, I am a most generous lord, you can take some grain from the castle to feed your starving family.
>Tell me who was charged to protect you from this dark magic ? I shall punish him harshly.
>Other option (Write in)

>>5087655
>Dites-moi qui a été chargé de te protéger de cette magie noire ? Je le punirai sévèrement

>>5087655
>Tell me who was charged to protect you from this dark magic ? I shall punish him harshly.

>>5087655
>Fear not peasant, I am a most generous lord, you can take some grain from the castle to feed your starving family.
>Tell me who was charged to protect you from this dark magic ? I shall punish him harshly.

>Other option (Write in)
Seek out the source of this poison.

>>5087655
>If these crops are so vulnerable to dark magic I forbid the peasants of my demesne to grow them ! We shall grow wheat like everyone else !
>We should muster a retinue to deal with these Ghibellines immediately, the forests in the south do not belong to them and I won't have them poaching!
>Ask Oldfossil about forest law and what rights had previously been granted to the occupants in the nearby forests as well as if we have been granted any royal licenses or if that has always been up to us.

>>5087655
>>If these crops are so vulnerable to dark magic I forbid the peasants of my demesne to grow them ! And I forbid to grow turnips, I hate turnips.

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>>5087655
>>5087674

>we should muster a retinue... check armaments of the villagers etc to deal with these gobelins/Ghibellines. If any of them are supporters of the Hohenstauffens we should send them to be imprisoned in the Castel del Monte of Charles I of Anjou (totally architecturally unrelated to High Hedge from Baldurs Gate, pic related)

>>5087655
>Tell me who was charged to protect you from this dark magic ? I shall punish him harshly.
>We should muster a retinue to deal with these Ghibellines immediately, the forests in the south do not belong to them and I won't have them poaching!
When you have a noble hammer forged in the mud, all problems become fantastic nail heads.

>>5087655
>If these crops are so vulnerable to dark magic I forbid the peasants of my demesne to grow them ! We shall grow wheat like everyone else !
>>5087670
It's us, Columbian-era crops are affected by our mudcore due to them not belonging in medieval Europe.

>>5087670
Support

>>5087697
>>5087712
If the QM is allowing more than one choice for this I support these decisions also. Absolutely no potatoes permitted in mudcore!!!

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>>5087659
>>5087664
>>5087670
>>5087674
>>5087697
>>5087700

You are a man of culture anon.

>>5087704
>>5087712
>>5087735

Inspired by the greatest statesmen : the Biblical king Solomon , Charlemagne and Saint Louis you emit multiple orders and ask some questions like a master statesman. You directly order :

-If these crops are so vulnerable to dark magic I forbid the peasants of my demesne to grow them ! We shall grow wheat like everyone else !

The peasant seems dismayed at first, he says...

-But potatoes have saved us from many...

-ENOUGH ! You will do as ordered. These crops will clearly not save you now.

He nods, in respect and awe before his lord and master. But being a young and dynamic ruler you continue, turning your attention to Oldfossil.

-We should muster a retinue to deal with these Ghibellines immediately, the forests in the south do not belong to them and I won't have them poaching !

The old man nods, clearly he is taken aback by the idea, he tries to object.

-But milord, we normally try to hire the adventurers guild for this kind of job gob...

-ENOUGH ! I will not have craftsmen or mercenaries like these "adventurer" rascals fight in place of your Local Lord and his men at arms !

You look at your men, they approve enthusiastically. The young Bohémond proclaims.

-Yes Messire ! We have shown the Englishmen and the Flemish the worth of our steel, we will show this Imperials too !

The dismayed peasant tries to argue but Bohémond answers.

-Imperials ? Are we rebelling against...

-Silence maraud ! Keep silent until talked to, I wouldn't want to whip you during the first day of rule of our Sire !

The peasant is terrified and you ask him paternalistically.

-Do not worry peasant, it is not against you that I shall direct my righteous fury. Tell me who was charged to protect you from this dark magic ? I shall punish him harshly.

>>5087750

He answers, shaking a bit.

-T... The... The Temple of Monsanto, the goddess protectress of the harvest... It is the only temple of the Local, we prayed to her a lot and...

You did not hear the rest and looked at your men, you were horrified, infidels ! All these people were infidels ! They tolerated a pagan temple in their village and were probably pagan too, the councillor looked at you in fear while all your men awaited you orders. Fortunately Brother Louis spoke in his quiet voice. The Templar had lived in infidel lands and knew how to deal with the situation better than you.

-Mylord, do not anger at the heathens, God's flock can be led astray if it is directed by deceitful shepherds. This man has not yet heard of the Gospel, but we can show them... We could, "pay a visit" to this temple...

His look was clear. He was for a fight, to challenge the false gods of the land. But maybe there was more clever solutions to this. Choose one of the following, the first with three votes wins.

>Go directly to the Temple and defy the priests, shock and awe tactics are the best, if we defeat the local clergy the people shall join us... Or not...
>Go to your castle first, let's see the men and deal with the Forest Germans, we will deal with this Monsanto later.
>Go to the castle and "invite" the priests of this false god in it to make them explain why their protection have not saved these crops. Then judge accordingly
>Go to the castle/temple and ask for information during the road about a topic of your choice
>Other option (write in)

Be careful dear anons, this decision will be the last of the little "Prologue" it is the last way for you to determine something about the basic stats of our character, after this he could evolve of course and "level up" in his local lordness (because this fantastical world will have effects on you too be assured) but for now it is the last chance to add something/remove something from his basic stats.

>>5087751
>Go to the castle and "invite" the priests of this false god in it to make them explain why their protection have not saved these crops. Then judge accordingly

Best to be impartial about these infidel's failings, so we can guide the misguided back into God's good graces.

>>5087751
>Go to your castle first, let's see the men and deal with the Forest Germans, we will deal with this Monsanto later.

>>5087751
>Go to the castle and "invite" the priests of this false god in it to make them explain why their protection have not saved these crops. Then judge accordingly

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We must beware this Monsatan, I have heard of a terrible Shaitan demon worshipped by the heathen and desert paynim and has even acquired a Teutonic congregation by the name of Bayer. This demon possesses terrible withering blights and desecrates all the land it touches.

>Go to the castle and "invite" the priests of this false god in it to make them explain why their protection have not saved these crops. Then judge accordingly

(I think the QM said one choice only here but if possible I would like to also listen for information along the way to the castle for the choice above)

>>5087751
>Go to the castle and "invite" the priests of this false god in it to make them explain why their protection have not saved these crops. Then judge accordingly

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>>5087759
>>5087761
>>5087763
>>5087779

I laughed a lot good sir, you never fail to entertain me !

>>5087877

You order your councillor to ride directly towards the castle, by the shortest way possible, we will visit the village after having seen the place. You see the building from far away, it's a quite impressive structure when you look at it from afar. Yes, it is far from the walls of Reims but it is your land, a land that belongs to you now. You may see the towers of the castle from afar, it stands on a small hill near the river, the only hill miles around. The castle has a dungeon, lordly quarters and is protected by a circle of walls. From this place you can dominate the wooden bridge you see on the river and the small and quite prosperous village that is built around it.

While you see it you think about how you fared in this land. Every time you had the occasion to use violence you did it, you acted like a determined knight never backing down from a challenge and always seeking martial glory. But you acted like a wise ruler too, you gave a fair trial to this "paladin" woman and you outlawed those dangerous crops tainted by dark magic, plus you did not give the peasant crops from you coffers before seeing the said coffers, a wise choice ! On the other side you can tell that even if you dislike to lie you had to be clever sometimes, you have hidden the bodies of the dead heretics and have decided to summon the priests of this Monsanto or Monsatan (as a voice in your head called the pagan deity), into your castle so you could dispatch them easily.

Then you thought about God, He sent you this trial and you tried to act in accordance with His commandments. You fought witches, you destroyed the Heretics and you prayed. You protected His Church. Unfortunately you have not helped the starving peasant with some grain but it happens.

In some other dimension some strange and anonymous forces can see :

>>5087895

===

Charles de Villeroi

Class : Local Lord
Level : 1

Stats

Combat : 50%
Intrigue : 25%
Rulership: 30%

These 3 stats will be rolled with a d100 but remember that most of the time you will have bonuses if you have good ideas. For example you will roll your natural combat if you attack with your army against an army of similar size with a frontal charge but if you try to use a better strategy you will have a bonus of +20 or more in your stats.

Piety : 18 (points of Piety can be stacked up to 100, pious actions give you piety, not pious actions can remove piety, piety can be spent to resist against magic and other foul effects of heresy. Serve God well and He will protect.)

Mudcore : 14, next level at 10 or 20, the more you act accordingly to the meme of the local lord the more this stat will be high.

With 14 Mudcore you have a small field of gritty realism around you, in this field the most heavy magic will not work and supernatural abilities will not work, oh, and women will lose 4 pounds of strength of course.
Do not confuse your small field of mudcore with the huge explosion of this "memetic energy" that occurred when you were teleported to this world. This explosion affected all the Local Lordship. You will need to act in a more memetic way to up this stat.

===

>I will let you write what you will want to do once in the castle.

>>5087898
Inspect the castle and its people to get familiar with the staff and to ensure no more Saracen spies are amongst us. Then we shall keep an account of our food and wealth stores, make plans to perhaps purchase more gain in case of famine should the failed crops spread.

After that we shall see to our men at arms and our captains of the guards for inspection. Finally we will find a quit place in our chamber, perhaps by our beside to pray.

I want one of our servants to raise concern at the lack of a church or a chapel so we become shock and a bit outraged before calming down and ordering a small hasty temporary chapel to be build before we make more plans for a bigger and grander one, and a church later down the line.

>>5087898
Set up a chapel to the Lord and get acquainted with our men, servants, and advisors.

>>5087898
Cleanse this place for God. Weed out the witches and heretics among the servants and consecrate a chapel.

>>5087911
>>5087918
supporting

>>5087898
I'll second all of the above notions.

>>5087918
I support this but I have a bad feeling that an altar / church can only be consecrated by a bishop (not exactly sure on the history but I do not think our Templar brother can perform this)

>>5087911
Support

>>5087911
+1

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>>5087914
Regret not taking the Confessor companion as in this Godless realm we have probably no way of cleansing ourselves of sin and may not have the sanction of just war or casus belli as described by Aquinas in the Summa contra Gentiles (1265). Perhaps the only way to maintain our piety is to somehow accelerate history by 300yrs, do a Henry VIII (become ze English Reformation, Fidei defensor) declare ourselves independent of Rome and Head of the Church of Local, consecrate everything ourselves??

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>>5087911
>>5087915
>>5087918
>>5087932
>>5087937
>>5087948
>>5087965
>>5087990

Yes, you will need a priest to cleanse yourself of sin, but one of the "paths" to upgrade your mudcore will enable you to bring reinforcements.

>>5087970

(I will begin by telling you about the guard, then you will inspect the rest of the household)

Once you enter the castle the councillor orders the gates opened and proclaims with joy that the forgotten heir of Lord Random has arrived. The people rejoice and you see lots of heads watching you from the windows. You order quickly to Oldfossil.

-Assemble all the household in the upper courtyard, I want to see my loyal servants.

It was your first moment as a lord and as a third son you have absolutely no idea about how to act. You try to mimic your Lord Father. Under ten minutes everyone is assembled and to say that you are disappointed would be an understatement. It was awful, you could not hide your dismay. First you looked at the household guard, if we can call this a household guard. The thirty people composing it were not very impressive.
Well, looking at them you saw their equipment, to be honest it was not bad, even good, every soldier was in full mail with an open helmet made from steel, and every armor was one and the same, the old lord must have paid very much to have troops so well equipped. Every man had a tabard with the heraldry of the old lord, a griffin on a muddy field, not one of the normal heraldic colors but maybe the laws of heraldry are different here. Unfortunately besides the armor nothing was right.

First the soldiers were not equipped with spears like normal troops, they seemed to have swords and they looked like they were not well trained in their use. A cavalry charge could slaughter them all. And swords are not very useful against armored men. And 8 men were equipped with bows, but not the longbows of the Welsh archers that you saw in the armies of the perfidious Englishmen. They had short bows and you doubted they were trained to use them well.

>>5088010

No saracens amongst these troops but 6 women ! Women ! In the guard ! And they looked like they were about to faint, not because of your good looks (you are a Frenchman after all) but because they seemed to have trouble staying in chainmail all day. And besides the women you saw three strange people, one of them was a woman too, they looked like normal people under their chainmail coifs and helmets but they were more thin... And they had something unsettling about them. They were taller than the rest of the guard and all were archers. They moved with a grace that was very strange to see. Finally you saw two guards who were very short, and bearded, and quite fat. They looked strong but you thought that their short reach would be detrimental in a fight. Fortunately they have some axes, at least ! Finally you saw one man that was definitely not a saracen but who had the strangest face that you saw, his skin was yellowy and his eyes were slanted. You heard about Mongols, a people with slanted eyes from far away, but you heard that the Mongols had hooves instead of feet and this man seemed to have normal legs so he could not be one of these men. The rest seemed to be quite normal looking people, even if none looked like men at arms.

The captain of the guard, who lead all this people was a relic from a bygone age, he was equiped like the other men but had a white plume on his helmet. If you thought that Oldfossil was old you could confidently say that this man was the oldest man that you saw. He seemed to have poor sight and walked shakily, he presented himself as.

-Captain Debris Crumbling at your service my lord... All the fighting men and women of Local are here before you....

>Say nothing, it is a sad enough spectacle as it is. Simply stare at them silently
>Begin a speech to the guardsmen to encourage them in their work
>Begin a speech to the guardsmen to encourage them in their work then say that you will only keep the best in the guard. It is time to make some reforms in this institution. (propose reforms)
>Look at them and ask questions about them to Oldfossil about the guard (write questions)
>Look at them and ask questions about them to the Crumbling Debris (write questions)
>Look at them and ask questions to one of the guardsmen (tell who you choose)
>Leave the guard and take a loot at the servants.
>Other option (write in)

>>5088012
>Begin a speech to the guardsmen to encourage them in their work then say that you will only keep the best in the guard. It is time to make some reforms in this institution. (They are to be equipped with proper weaponry and trained in its use. The women have to go, it is a travesty to have a woman in armour.)

>Look at them and ask questions about them to the Crumbling Debris (What the fuck is up with the thin people and the short fatties?)

>>5088012
Oh, and what's up with the slant eyed yellow skinned guy. Yeah, that too.

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>>5088021
Perhaps this "Mongol" is one of the Black Khitans...?

>Ask the strange Mongol if he is of the Western Khitan kingdom, and if so does he know of their secret fire-lances and strange alchemy (look, I just really want some matchlocks handgonnes and harquebuses, we are probably only 98 years away from getting them)

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No wonder all the peasant children have become hunchbacked, it is because all the child-rearing women and mothers are bizarrely wearing armour and playing make-believe battle instead of nurturing their progeny.

If the Mongol and these strange women are actually from the realm of "D'iver City" we have a long and difficult task ahead of us

>>5088012
>Leave the guard and take a loot at the servants.
Pathetic

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>propose reform: the armoured women should immediately divest themselves of all their armour and return to childrearing and looking after their abandoned hunchbacked children properly. Replace the women and arm the stoutest local peasants instead.

>>5088012
>>Begin a speech to the guardsmen to encourage them in their work then say that you will only keep the best in the guard. It is time to make some reforms in this institution. (propose reforms)
Arrest all the women as witches! This is a disgrace! Only with the power of witchcraft they can wear an armor and wield a weapon.

>>5088051
Changing to this >>5088063 something must be done immediately. A public example for these errant women must be made.

>>5088012
>Begin a speech to the guardsmen to encourage them in their work then say that you will only keep the best in the guard. It is time to make some reforms in this institution.
>They need proper weaponry, spears, shields, crossbows axes. And most important, and taking women out of service for the good lord's sake what kind of savages would put their women to fight?

>Look at them and ask questions about them to the Crumbling Debris.
>How long has the castle been under siege, by whom?

>>5088012
>Say nothing, it is a sad enough spectacle as it is. Simply stare at them silently
>Begin a speech to the guardsmen to encourage them in their work

>>5088063
>>5088066
I'd rather us not start out our reign by executing our household guard for the crime of not conforming to a different universe's values. This will poison the well we're drinking from. I'd suggest we wait until it becomes apparent to them all that the women should never have been in armor at all.

>>5088086
If we're doing the pig headed chauvinist crusader thing, then I think we should go all the way.

>>5088086
Personally I think we should stay "in-character" but make accommodations for things that would realistically give us pause. Like if we have the choice to be pragmatic at the cost of being pious, realistically there is a decent chance our moral fiber may fail us and we'd take the easier option. And we can probably make some decent decisions in regards to ruling and politics that don't break our chauvinist, noble crusader vibe as there is a lot of range in that archetype if you consider all the varying decisions made by real life nobles.

>>5088094
Considering that killing them won't endear us to the remaining household guard, it just seems like a retarded move instead of just pig headed chauvinist crusader. Dismissing them would be way better and more IC.

>>5088115
I intend on playing this character straight, but murdering the comrades of our household guard is just plain stupid, even if these women should never have been put in armor in the first place. As archers, I could tolerate, as English men are more feminine and make for great archers anyway, but to claim witchcraft for merely wearing armor is a miscarriage of God's Justice (the drowned woman was seizing and speaking in tongues, hence why we gave her a fair trial by water, but these women have yet to exhibit those supernatural actions).

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>>5088019
>>5088021
>>5088030
>>5088051
>>5088063
>>5088066
>>5088075
>>5088086

Seeing all the guard, green boys, women and strange shorties in line before you you look at your men at arms who seem scandalised that such a pitiful force could be created. You begin to understand why the locals need an "adventurer's guild", you would prefer to fight besides brabançon mercenaries than besides this "army". So you advance, still on your horse, and you begin to speak in a deep voice the best imitation of your lord father that you can manage. You advance on your horse, and they all bow their heads, magnificent and strong you proclaim in an approximative grammar of their dialect.

-With the end of my dear relative, Lord Random, ends the reign of the elders and women of our lordship. And begins a manly reign, a chivalrous reign, a just but firm reign.

You look at the women in the guard.

-All of you ladies in the guard, my old relative does not need your services anymore, leave immediately this castle, you are dismissed. Women trying to play warriors : begone !

There is some shock in the troops and some of the women try to look at you but they are terrified, but you spot four or five guardsmen who seem to agree with your idea. You understand that you need to teach them some discipline. They must be half-time soldiers, let's make them full time men at arms.

-Now the amount of leave of the troops will not be more than three days a week !

You hear grumbling and add.

-And training will begin at dawn, no, one hour before dawn ! And you better not try to skip !

There is no more grumbling, it is clear now, you won, they seem defeated, and terrified, but some of them seem hopeful, they seemed to wait a long time for such discipline to be put into place. So you finish with.

-And remember men, now you are my loyal men-at-arms, the men-at-arms of the Local Lord, you will be given new weapons, you will learn the art of war and be the best troops in the realm. Be proud of it !

====

**Dear Anons, it is time to roll a die for your speech, the first die of this game, 1d100 using the average of your martial/rulership (so 40) with a bonus of +10 to win the day. I will take the average of the first three rolls, if it is less than 50 there will be resistance and contradiction from your subjects**

Rolled 40 (1d100)

>>5088129

Rolled 27 + 10 (1d100 + 10)

>>5088129
Oh boy, a speech!

Rolled 34 (1d100)

>>5088129

haha time for VIOLENCE

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>>5088134
>>5088135
>>5088139

Persuaded by your fiery rhetoric and inspired by your words some guardsmen approved. Yes the women and some of them looked dismayed but some of them, some young lads, looked at you with stars in their eyes and began to nod approvingly at your speech. Maybe they have joined the guard to become better men, and to master the art of war and your speech rejoiced them. Or maybe they wanted to, at last, see some action. So five guardsmen exclaimed.

-Hooray !

And you turned yourself to the old captain who was quite taken aback by this vigorous reforms but who feared the unknown. You looked towards him and decided to ask him some questions.

>How long has the castle been under siege, by whom ?
>What is it with the thin people and the short fatties ?
>Other question (write in)

========

Since two of you voted to ask questions to the captain I will answer one of the two questions who was voted and next I will answer another question, maybe the other question if you vote for it or maybe another one that you will think about. It will be the second question with the most votes.
So please vote for 2 questions and at least one of the two first.

Oh and you gain +1 mudcore for fighting against this "warrior women" nonsense and +1 piety too for sparing those poor wenches the horrors of the fields of battle.

>>5088152
>How long has the castle been under siege, by whom ?
>What is it with the thin people and the short fatties ?

>>5088152
>>How long has the castle been under siege, by whom ?
>>What is it with the thin people and the short fatties ?

>>5088152
>How long has the castle been under siege, by whom ?
>What is it with the thin people and the short fatties ?

>>5088128
...? I wasn't the one who wanted to kill them or try them for witchcraft.

>>5088152
>How long has the castle been under siege, by whom ?
>What is it with the thin people and the short fatties ?

>>5088152
>>How long has the castle been under siege, by whom ?
>>What is it with the thin people and the short fatties ?
>>Other question (write in)
Where are the guelphs and ghibellines ? Who leads them and from which realm they are from ?
Show me a map of my lands and the realm ! Now !(time for the shocking reveal. Our templar will be probably able to understand by now this is no europe, unlike us or our retinue)

>>5088152
>>What is it with the thin people and the short fatties ?

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>>5088158
>>5088163
>>5088194
>>5088201
>>5088563
>>5088599

Wanting to know more about the quality of your defenses you ask.


-How long has the castle been under siege, by whom ?

The old man seems less incompetent than he looks when he answers the first question. He seems to be recalling from his memory and says with a hint of nostalgia in his tone.

-Oh, my Lord... it was a long time ago, I was a young man then, a young man of only fifteen summers. Our castle you know, is not even in a border region, so we are generally quite safe but this time it was for naught. The barbarians from the north came in force this year, they smashed our forts at the Impassable passes and poured into the countryland. All the Northern March was set aflame and after the northern march they came for our duchy, the duchy of Nowhere was next. They never got to Nowhere but they passed by our region and stormed the castle. They were hundreds of them, thousands, and we had only twenty men as a garrison. They lost a lot of men but they stormed the walls with ladders. We stood two days, the time for this idiots to figure out how to build those ladders.
Lord Basic, father of Lord Random, ordered me to guard his son and hide him in the underground passage of the castle. I did it and protected him against two barbarian warriors and I managed to kill them before they could call the others. It is how I got promoted to captain of the guard, I had saved the new Lord and was the only survivor.

Then you ask him, quite interested.

-Well and what about these short fat bearded soldiers. Why have you taken them ?

He answers quickly.

-They are Orin and Florin, good soldiers my Lord, dwarves are good warriors. Brave and sturdy.

You try to speak to Brother Louis about it, whispering the word « Cagots ? » but he shakes his head, if they look like cagots they are a bit fat for that. You ask again, this time about the thin people.

-And these two soldiers, and the woman who just left, they are quite tall but they walk in a strange way, they seem to practically float above the ground...

-Yes, elves mylord, good archers, very good archers. Gardasil and Manitol. Since elves do not pay taxes I figured out that it would be better to take some of them in the guard, at least they are useful.

Well, you are not convinced, these « dwarves » seem to be a kind of cagots, and it is an accursed people, plus they do not have a long reach with their short arms, and what kind of horses can they mount ? A pony is already big for them... And those elves, they look like a strong wind can make them fly, and they look not natural. Like fairies from the legends. You doubt they are old Guelph mercenaries, or they may be a kind of very feminine looking Italians maybe ? You know after all that southrons have strange habits and dress practically like women. So you frown and answer.

>>5088883

>I want none of this « Guelves » amongst my men at arms, they look like they are bewitched. We cannot trust them.
>I want none of this dwarves amongst my men at arms, they can not mount on a horse and foot soldiers are practically peasants.
>I want not Guelphs nor cagots, or Dwarves as you call them, in my household troops. I want to form proper troops, it means shock cavalry, and these people are either too short or too weak to ride a warhorse.
>Thank Captain Crumbling for his help and say that we will keep this bearded cagots and this Guelphs, they will maybe be useful as arrow-fodder in your campaign against the forest Ghibellines.
>Why are these Guelphs exempted from paying taxes ? Has the pope rewarded them for their loyalty ?
>Are the defenses of the castle strong after that siege ? Do we have some provisions ?
>Give a raise in pay to the remaining guards to win their loyalty.
>Thank the captain and go look at the servants. You will have time to reform this household guard another day.
>Other... (write in)

Choose one choice please. First choice chosen 3 times by the anons will win.

>>5088884
>I want not Guelphs nor cagots, or Dwarves as you call them, in my household troops. I want to form proper troops, it means shock cavalry, and these people are either too short or too weak to ride a warhorse.

>>5088884
>>Thank Captain Crumbling for his help and say that we will keep this bearded cagots and this Guelphs, they will maybe be useful as arrow-fodder in your campaign against the forest Ghibellines.

Allow them to prove themselves perhaps?

>>5088884
>>Why are these Guelphs exempted from paying taxes ? Has the pope rewarded them for their loyalty ?
It's time we learned the truth.

>>5088884
>>Why are these Guelphs exempted from paying taxes ? Has the pope rewarded them for their loyalty ?

>>5088884
>Why are these Guelphs exempted from paying taxes ? Has the pope rewarded them for their loyalty ?
>Are the defenses of the castle strong after that siege ? Do we have some provisions ?

>Other... (write in)
I have my doubts as to the usefulness of these short man dwarves, and skinny bone boys, so I will ask them to prove themselves in skill and weapon before I consider if they may continue their service to me. Perhaps we should have had the women do the same, perhaps then we could have shown the woman the foolishness of donning armor.

>>5088884
>Why are these Guelphs exempted from paying taxes ? Has the pope rewarded them for their loyalty

>>5088884
>I want not Guelphs nor cagots, or Dwarves as you call them, in my household troops. I want to form proper troops, it means shock cavalry, and these people are either too short or too weak to ride a warhorse.

Them being in our mudcore presence will diminish them once our memetic potential gets out of hand.

>Why are these Guelphs exempted from paying taxes ? Has the pope rewarded them for their loyalty ?
>Are the defenses of the castle strong after that siege ? Do we have some provisions ?
>Spread out the pay from the fired women and others amongst the remaining guards to win their loyalty.

>>5088884
>>Thank the captain and go look at the servants. You will have time to reform this household guard another day.

>>5088883
Pourquoi ces Guelfes sont-ils exemptés de payer des taxes ? Le pape les a-t-il récompensés pour leur loyauté ?

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>>5088907
>>5088943
>>5088948
>>5088953
>>5088962
>>5088999
>>5089087
>>5089096
>>5089102

Curious about politics you ask.

-Why are these Guelphs exempted from paying taxes ? Has the pope rewarded them for their loyalty ?

The old man thinks, and you see that he is wondering who this "pope" his. Mmmmh, you knew you were in infidel lands but the fact that they do not even know about the pope is not logical. Guelphs are partisans of the pope, and even if they had contact with Genoese merchants the locals would have heard about the pope. Maybe their "Guelphs" meant another thing ? Or maybe this man was only a senile heathen... Yes, he was probably heathen, and it is more than probable that he simple does not know the religious peculiarities of Christendom but only the political parties. It is true, you think, after all you know not a lot of things about the Saracens, you know that they do not have the same rulers in the Holy Land and in Tunis, some dynasties whose name ends in "id" and that they pray to Mahomet... Well, you fought before that the Saracens had three gods, Apollyon, Tervagant and Mahomet when you heard the song of Roland but you know that after the crusades that this notions are outdated. The Saracens have definitely one god and it seems to be Mahomet. And how do they worship him ? You have no idea ! Just like you have no idea about their clergy. You imagine that the old man have absolutely no idea about Christendom, but heard about factions called Guelphs and Ghibellins. Some would say that you try to desperately avoid the terrifying notion that you are really far away from home but you prefer to not think about it. The old man answers.

-Well... My Lord... I do not know who this "Pop" is but they were granted privileges by the emperor. The elves have been granted privileges after the Woodlands Wars and the Treaty of Tricked. To be honest the war has been waged by the vassal kingdoms more than by the Emperor but he acted to make peace. But I do not know anymore of this politics, the Councillor knows more than me.

You remember to ask Oldfossil and you decide to go see the servants of the household.

You have 20 servants, 12 men and 8 women, the kennel master is a huge man with a blond beard and the stable hands seem to know their job, the kitchens seem to be ruled by a fat woman and the castle's brewer is one of those short fat people. He gives you a hanap of beer and you must admit that it is the best that you have ever tasted. Even the best beers of Flanders paled in comparison. Finally you saw cagots ! Yes true cagots ! A small and ugly man and woman quite richly dressed and with hairy feet. You never saw a cagot, only heard the description, and did not knew about their hairy feet but it is believable. If Mongols have hoofs these people can have strange body parts too.

>>5089134

What do you tell to the servants ?

>Tell them that they have done a good job and that you need quarters prepared for your men and you.
>Tell nothing and go directly to your new quarters.
>Ask Oldfossil about these hairy feet cagots
>Praise the beer of the fat bearded cagot and give him some money for his good work, maybe a "Sou Tournoi" or two. Even if these rich people pay in gold it can be a good gesture.
>Look more closely for nice looking maids.
>Other (write in)

>>5089102

Ravi de voir un gentilhomme françois !

>>5089138
>Look more closely for nice looking maids.
hon hon hon hon

>>5089138
>>Look more closely for nice looking maids.
Based Druon reading frogs

>>5089138
>>Ask Oldfossil about these hairy feet cagots
>>Praise the beer of the fat bearded cagot and give him some money for his good work, maybe a "Sou Tournoi" or two. Even if these rich people pay in gold it can be a good gesture.

We can't be mean to halflings, come on.

>>5089138
>Ask Oldfossil about these hairy feet cagots
>Praise the beer of the fat bearded cagot and give him some money for his good work, maybe a "Sou Tournoi" or two. Even if these rich people pay in gold it can be a good gesture.
>Look more closely for nice looking maids.

Good beer is good shit, I don't even mind if the

>>5089251
Cargots made them.

>>5089138
>Tell them that they have done a good job and that you need quarters prepared for your men and you.
>Praise the beer of the fat bearded cagot and give him some money for his good work, maybe a "Sou Tournoi" or two. Even if these rich people pay in gold it can be a good gesture.
>Look more closely for nice looking maids.

>>5089138
>Ask Oldfossil about these hairy feet cagots
>Praise the beer of the fat bearded cagot and give him some money for his good work, maybe a "Sou Tournoi" or two. Even if these rich people pay in gold it can be a good gesture.

File: Love.jpg (114 KB, 950x517)

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>>5089143
>
>>5089167
>>5089205
>>5089251
>>5089263
>>5089285
>>5089294

First you looked at what was the most important thing for any Frenchman, or any man, the women. And you found out that excluding the fat woman of the kitchen and the hairy feeted cagot woman the women servants of this place were more or less average, well, three were more or less average, quite young but not particularly beautiful, and another one was an old crone. But the other two were more interesting. One was clearly above average with beautiful curves, black hair and brown eyes, plus you noticed that her teeth were all in place, a quite rare thing amongst peasant girls but the other one, the other one was the kind of girl that we write ballads about. With her long brown hair, perfect skin and big dove like brown eyes she was clearly a beauty, and she had feminine forms that your author, by modesty, will not describe, but who could have been those of one of the ancient pagan statues in a roman temple. You asked her.

-What is your name girl...

And the young maid answered.

-Stacy my lord...

-Excellent, Stacy, I want my quarters ready.

She blushed, then you looked at the other maids and added.

-And I want you all to prepare quarters for my retinue, and a meal. Oh and you, brewmaster, what is your name ?

The fat and bearded cagot answered.

-I'm Ethyli Comasson my lord.

-Well take this money brewer, you earned it. And you all earned my gratitude, you did a good work, this castle is well kept. Continue like this, you can be proud.

They all bow and you dismount your horse and enter the building. The brewer look particularly honoured as he runs his hand through his long blond beard and puffs out his chest. He takes the money with pleasure and with a look of greed that you only saw in the eyes of some jews, lombards and venetians. It is time to begin the visit after all. Oldfossil will do you a quick tour of everything but perhaps you want to see something in particular.

>I want to see the great hall where we will feast and I will rule
>I want to see the state of the defences, were do you keep your arrows and your food ?
>I want to see the treasury, are the coffers full ?
>I want to see (choose another place of a typical medieval castle)...

I will go for today dear anons, I will answer tomorrow and I will start with the most chosen place.

>>5089341
>>I want to see the state of the defences, were do you keep your arrows and your food ?

>>5089341
>I want to see the state of the defences, were do you keep your arrows and your food ?

>>5089341
>I want to see the state of the defences, were do you keep your arrows and your food ?

>>5089341
>I want to see the state of the defences, were do you keep your arrows and your food ?
>I want to see the treasury, are the coffers full ?
>I want to see the great hall where we will feast and I will rule
In that order.

>>5089341
>I want to see the state of the defences, were do you keep your arrows and your food ?
>I want to see the treasury, are the coffers full ?

>>5089341
>>I want to see the treasury, are the coffers full ?

File: Armor of Lord Random.jpg (375 KB, 1920x2880)

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>>5089347
>>5089358
>>5089360
>>5089460
>>5089516
>>5089648

You ordered to begin your inspection by the defences of the castle and the old councillor, who struggled to mount the stairs, got you around the chemin de ronde. To be honest the castle was well defended, the walls were in perfect condition and instead of wooden hoarding the castle was equipped of the more modern machicolation. The castle has a view on the bridge to the village that is mostly on the other side of it and from it’s towers an archer can fire to the river easily. The proximity with the river is used to build a moat always full of water. There is four towers on the castle plus the dungeon : the Eagle’s tower, a tall and thin tower made to fire at the attackers who try to attack the the Lion’s tower, the second’s biggest tower, from the angle. The Trout’s tower is a fat and quite small tower, really more a gatehouse, that houses the castle gate is well fortified and the last tower, the Cyclop’s tower protects the river. The dungeon is in the middle of everything and adjacent to the building serving as the Local Lord’s quarters.

Then you inspect the armoury and you must say that if the guard is pathetic and the personnal above average the weapon stocks are in good condition. You have some spears, halberds, and even two or three crossbows and a huge stock of arrows. Well, arrows do not take much place but you prefer crossbows in a castle simply because an arrow takes twice as much place than a crossbow bolt. More ammunition means a longer siege. At least you can equip the guard with all of this.

Then you find a marvel ! A full steel armor ! A powerful armor with an helmet ! Unfortunately it has pauldrons that reduce the field of vision of the wearer but it is impressive. Well, less impressive when you see that some vital parts are not protected. While you inspect it Oldfossil says.

-It is the old plate armor of Lord Random. It is a bit small for you but we can make one for you.

You answer.

-Excellent idea, but I will need to think about the design first.

And with these words you continue to the food storage were the happy fat woman ruling the kitchen shows you the food cellars. But once you enter and she opens one of the bags she gasps in shock.

-All thé potatoes ! They are rotten !

Oldfossil seems shocked too and open another bag. Dark magic ! Again ! You do the sign of the cross to protect yourself against it. Then you and your men, joined by servants began to open everything to try to see what was spoiled.

It seems that every ounce of “Korn”, “Pautatoes”, “Kakao”, “Dried Tomataues” and the stock of “Tobaquo” have all been lost but grain, onions, citrus, lentils and many other plants were still in place. Everyone was dismayed, what to do ?

>>5090171

>Punish the servants for their carelessness. How can they let food rot ?
>Dark magic seems to be powerful on this land, and we must defend ourselves against it, forbid immediately the culture of “Korn”, “Pautatoes”, “Kakao”, “Tomataues” and “Tobaquo" for these crops are too vulnerable.
>Reassure the servants, say that you have seen such dark magic on the road. Say that you will summon the priests of Monsanto tomorrow and order this clerics to explain themselves about such a failure to preserve good food.
>Reassure the servants, say that you have seen such dark magic on the road. Say that you will investigate the source of this dark magic.
>Other (write in)

>>5090175
>Dark magic seems to be powerful on this land, and we must defend ourselves against it, forbid immediately the culture of “Korn”, “Pautatoes”, “Kakao”, “Tomataues” and “Tobaquo" for these crops are too vulnerable.

>>5090175
>Reassure the servants, say that you have seen such dark magic on the road. Say that you will summon the priests of Monsanto tomorrow and order this clerics to explain themselves about such a failure to preserve good food.
>Reassure the servants, say that you have seen such dark magic on the road. Say that you will investigate the source of this dark magic.

Let's not get to hasty in pissing everybody off. We should boil this heretical frog slowly, so that he doesn't realize he's getting cooked and tries to jump out and escape God's Justice. Beside, Jesus Christ is ever merciful, he'd want us to give a chance for these heretics to see the error of their ways and worship the one True Lord of the Heavens.

>>5090175
>Reassure the servants, say that you have seen such dark magic on the road. Say that you will summon the priests of Monsanto tomorrow and order this clerics to explain themselves about such a failure to preserve good food.
>Reassure the servants, say that you have seen such dark magic on the road. Say that you will investigate the source of this dark magic.
We can't be too muddy.

>>5090175

>Reassure the servants, say that you have seen such dark magic on the road. Say that you will summon the priests of Monsanto tomorrow and order this clerics to explain themselves about such a failure to preserve good food.

>Reassure the servants, say that you have seen such dark magic on the road. Say that you will investigate the source of this dark magic.

>Dark magic seems to be powerful on this land, and we must defend ourselves against it, forbid immediately the culture of “Korn”, “Pautatoes”, “Kakao”, “Tomataues” and “Tobaquo" for these crops are too vulnerable.

>>5090175
>>Reassure the servants, say that you have seen such dark magic on the road. Say that you will summon the priests of Monsanto tomorrow and order this clerics to explain themselves about such a failure to preserve good food.
>>Reassure the servants, say that you have seen such dark magic on the road. Say that you will investigate the source of this dark magic.

>>5090171
>Réassurer les serviteurs, annoncer que nous avons vu une telle magie noire sur le chemin. Dire que nous convoquerons les prêtres du temple de Monsanto demain et ordonnerons a ces pasteurs de s'expliquer a propos d'un tel échec pour préserver de la bonne nourriture.
>Réassurer les serviteurs, dire que nous avons vu une telle magie noire sur le chemin. Dire que nous allons investiguer la source de cette magie noire.

I agree with >>5090240, too much mud too early might backfire eventually.

>>5090171
>Reassure the servants, say that you have seen such dark magic on the road. Say that you will summon the priests of Monsanto tomorrow and order this clerics to explain themselves about such a failure to preserve good food.
>Reassure the servants, say that you have seen such dark magic on the road. Say that you will investigate the source of this dark magic.

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>>5090202
>>5090207
>>5090240
>>5090320
>>5090371
>>5090382

You try to reassure the good people of your keep and you say in a confident tone.

-Do not worry, I will summon the clergy of Monsanto tomorrow, they are responsible for protecting our food, I shall ask them, in the great hall, before all the good people of Local, what went wrong. I already have encountered such cases of crop failures and I suspect that some dark magic is responsible. Know that I will find the source of this dark magic and destroy it.

The people cheer. You think about ordering them to stop growing this strange crops that are so vulnerable to dark magic but you abstain. For now it is best to wait the explanations of these Monsanto heretics to know if everything is wrong. You wonder if you can make the people lose faith in this heathen deity by pointing out that it is absolutely not useful. If their “goddess” cannot protect their harvest what use is that whore ? You need to talk about it with Brother Louis, your Templar friend.

After this you order to your dear councillor to show you the treasury. Better to know if the coffers are full to buy some food in place of the lost crops. The councillor says in a joyful tone.

-Yes my Lord, we have 10 000 gold coins in reserve, I kept the finances in a very good shape and to be honest I am very proud of my accomplishment. Look, they are here.

He shows you a kind of metal gate and inserts a strange key into it. He says.

-Dwarven made, they are the best at this.

When the gate opens Oldfossil gasps in shock, you do not gasp, there is a huge sum here, but you are terrified by what has happened. He told about gold coins and you have seen that it is the basic currency here but your coffers are not full of gold. They are full of silver ! Oldfossil says...

-I... I... My Lord, I do not know what happened, only me and Lord Random have keys, I took the key of the Lord on me..

He gives you the key and continues.

-How ?!? How can...

The old man has troubles breathing and you answer.

>A thief ? Here ?
>Surely the same dark magic as for the crops. I doubt a thief would have brought so much silver in to replace gold.
>Punish Oldfossil, keeping gold in the vault was his responsibility.
>Ask who was responsible for protecting your treasury from dark magic.
>Order your councillor to count the number of silver coins in here. How much money do we still have ?
>Other (write in)

>>5090407
>>Order your councillor to count the number of silver coins in here. How much money do we still have ?

>>5090407
>Surely the same dark magic as for the crops. I doubt a thief would have brought so much silver in to replace gold.
>Order your councillor to count the number of silver coins in here. How much money do we still have ?

>>5090407
>>Punish Oldfossil, keeping gold in the vault was his responsibility.
>>Ask who was responsible for protecting your treasury from dark magic.

>>5090382
>>5090240

Well, to be honest I have maynot been very clear about your Mudcore Stat, it is actually at 15 and it is not very much. You have, as I have told you here >>5087898 "a small field of gritty realism around you, in this field the most heavy magic will not work and supernatural abilities will not work, oh, and women will lose 4 pounds of strength of course". Your Mudcore field is still not really powerful. When we think about "too much mudcore" think that high fantasy is at 0 to 40 mudcore, low fantasy from 40 to 80, Medieval Europe from 80 to 120 and the parody meme with households speaking different languages at 120 and more.
There can be nasty effects from too much mudcore (directly or indirectly caused by it) so it is good to be careful but know that we can lose mudcore points, even if it is more difficult than gaining them.
Oh, and know that your mudcore can "specialise" when you hit 40 mudcore points, I will not tell how but it may be interesting, even if it is a bit dangerous.
Likely your piety can "specialise" too and you will have a big choice to do when you will hit 100 piety (you have 19). Good luck !

>>5090406

Sorry to not have answered you directly, but you wrote when I was already posting.

>>5090407
>A thief ? Here ?
>Surely the same dark magic as for the crops. I doubt a thief would have brought so much silver in to replace gold.
>Ask who was responsible for protecting your treasury from dark magic.
>Order your councillor to count the number of silver coins in here. How much money do we still have ?

Motherfuckers took our gold!

>>5090407
>>Surely the same dark magic as for the crops. I doubt a thief would have brought so much silver in to replace gold.
>>Order your councillor to count the number of silver coins in here. How much money do we still have ?

>>5090407
>>Surely the same dark magic as for the crops. I doubt a thief would have brought so much silver in to replace gold.
>>Ask who was responsible for protecting your treasury from dark magic.
>>Order your councillor to count the number of silver coins in here. How much money do we still have ?

>>5090407
>Surely the same dark magic as for the crops. I doubt a thief would have brought so much silver in to replace gold.
>Ask who was responsible for protecting your treasury from dark magic.
>Order your councillor to count the number of silver coins in here. How much money do we still have ?

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>>5090409
>>5090412
>>5090417
>>5090494
>>5090513
>>5090521
>>5090522

You immediately order your councillor to count the number of silver coins that are in the vaults. You know it is a great number because the vaults are full. You tell :

-I want to know how much we have lost, tell me how much money do we still have.

The councillor nods and takes some silver coins, looking them closely with his torch and gasps.

-My lord ! The coins ! They are minted with a crown !

-And ?

-And silver coins are minted with a tree, these are not silver coins as my old eyes have seen, these are gold coins transmuted into silver by foul magic or alchemy !

You frown, this revelation is shocking, you maintain your order to look at the number of coins and think, you have never seen such magic even if you heard legends about some alchemists capable of changing lead to gold but you never witnessed them doing this. It was a huge problems for your finances and you will need to find solutions, maybe borrow some money from the jews, or the lombards, if there is jews or lombards in this forgotten region. But it was probable that they were somewhere, if a region paid in gold coins without using silver it was more than probable that Venetians, Genoese, jews or lombards will flock to this region. You ordered your councillor to show you the rest of the castle and you were quite happy with it. The great hall had a great chimney and a quite imposing throne and your quarters were confortable. After the visit and before dinner what do you do.

>Ask Oldfossil if there is an alchemist here or someone who could have changed gold into silver.
>Pray into your chambers, it is the best defence against the forces of darkness
>Ask for Stacy to be brought to your chambers, you need some solace amidst this hard trials.
>Speak with your retainers, you need their advice.
>Go on the roof of your dungeon and watch your demesne from the battlements
>Other (write in)

Choose one choice.

>>5090545
>Ask for Stacy to be brought to your chambers, you need some solace amidst this hard trials.
Bastard children go brrrrrr

>>5090545
>Ask Oldfossil if there is an alchemist here or someone who could have changed gold into silver.
>Pray into your chambers, it is the best defence against the forces of darkness
>Ask for Stacy to be brought to your chambers, you need some solace amidst this hard trials.

>>5090545
>>Ask for Stacy to be brought to your chambers, you need some solace amidst this hard trials.

>>5090555
>Choose one choice.

>>5090545
>Pray into your chambers, it is the best defence against the forces of darkness
>Ask for Stacy to be brought to your chambers, you need some solace amidst this hard trials.
>Speak with your retainers, you need their advice.

We need to speak to Brother Louis about figuring out a way to convert these heathens.

>>5090545
>Speak with your retainers, you need their advice.

Wait, nevermind, didn't see the Choose One.

>>5090545
>Pray into your chambers, it is the best defence against the forces of darkness

>>5090557
I honestly didn't see the Choose One bit.

>>5090545
>>Speak with your retainers, you need their advice.

>>5090545
>Pray into your chambers, it is the best defence against the forces of darkness
>>Speak with your retainers, you need their advice.

I suspect that the crops were magically enhanced and preserved, while the silver was disguised as gold with some magic and we came and dispelled the magic.

>>5090545
>Pray into your chambers, it is the best defence against the forces of darkness.

>>5090545
>Pray into your chambers, it is the best defence against the forces of darkness

>>5090600
It's realism more broadly as opposed to just magic (Columbian-era crops, competent women, a small lord having a giant coffer of gold, etc.) that was affected.

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>>5090549
>>5090555
>>5090557
>>5090572
>>5090574
>>5090593
>>5090594
>>5090600
>>5090622
>>5090654

You thought about everything you could do on these times of need but only one thing came to your mind. Prayer. God Almighty has sent you a trial and as a true knight you would have to take up the challenge. You were deeply into infidel lands, not knowing about the path to go back to France, but you were put in power and as all power comes from God it was His will that you ruled this fief in accordance to His commandments. You had always fought His ennemies and protected His church, you will not falter now. You unsheathed your sword and knelt saying in a deep tone.

-Pater noster, qui es in caelis :
sanctificetur nomen tuum :
adveniat regnum tuum :
fiat voluntas tua, sicut in caelo, et in terra.
Panem nostrum quotidianum da nobis hodie :
et dimitte nobis debita nostra,
sicut et nos dimittimus debitoribus nostris
et ne nos inducas in tentationem.
Sed libera nos a malo.
Amen...

You stay silent a long moment in prayer, you think about your father managing his fief and how you were never raised to do the same thing. You were always a warrior, first and foremost. You prayed.

-Praise be to you o Lord, praise be, give me the strength to remain just in these times of woe. Give me the strength to show the way to these heretics and to bring them into Your fold, give me the strength to protect my people and to preserve your churches.

You ask for the protection of your family, back in France, and your men that are with you. Then, after a long prayer a maid comes to tell you that dinner is served. It is time to go eat something and taste the local food. But during dinner, with your knights, Oldfossil and Captain Crumbling you will have the time to speak about some subjects. What are they (choose 3 choices).

>What is this Woodland Wars and this treaty of Tricked that you talked me about ?
>Is there an alchemist that could have changed our gold into silver ?
>You talked about the Mages Guild, what are they ? Some cabal of demon worshippers ?
>You talked to me about an Emperor, who is he ?
>You talked to me about an adventurer's guild, who are these people ? Some kind of vagabonds ? Mercenaries ?
>Tell me more about the geography of our seigneury, where are our borders ?
>Tell me more about the politics of our lordship, you talked about a liege lord ?
>Tell me who are this "Vassal Kingdoms" ?
>Is there any moneylenders here ?
>Tell me more about this church of Monsanto ?
>Other (write in)

I will go for this night but tomorrow I will answer to the 3 most chosen questions. You gain +1 piety.

>>5090665
>>Is there an alchemist that could have changed our gold into silver ?
>>You talked to me about an adventurer's guild, who are these people ? Some kind of vagabonds ? Mercenaries ?
>>Tell me more about this church of Monsanto ?

>>5090665
>Tell me more about this church of Monsanto ?

>>5090665
>Is there any moneylenders here ?
>Tell me more about the politics of our lordship, you talked about a liege lord ?
>Tell me who are this "Vassal Kingdoms" ?

>>5090665
>Tell me more about this church of Monsanto ?

Important for our future conversion efforts and knowing what we are dealing with.

>Tell me more about the geography of our seigneury, where are our borders ?
>Tell me more about the politics of our lordship, you talked about a liege lord ?

Most important questions for management and knowing what we should and should not do if we want to stay alive and keep this fief.

>>5090665
>Is there an alchemist that could have changed our gold into silver ? Or one that can turn our silver back to gold?
>You talked about the Mages Guild, what are they ? Some cabal of demon worshippers ?
>Tell me more about this church of Monsanto ?

>>5090665
>Tell me more about this church of Monsanto ?
>You talked about the Mages Guild, what are they ? Some cabal of demon worshippers ?
>Tell me more about the politics of our lordship, you talked about a liege lord ?

>>5090665
>>You talked about the Mages Guild, what are they ? Some cabal of demon worshippers ?
>>You talked to me about an Emperor, who is he ?
>Tell me more about the geography of our seigneury, where are our borders ?

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>>5090673
>>5090678
>>5090685
>>5090727
>>5090771
>>5090779
>>5091175

While you are eating your delicious venison and drinking the beer of the bearded cagot Ethyli Comasson you ask a question to your loyal councillors.

-Dear Oldfossil, tell me more about this church of Monsanto, we will need to see them tomorrow after all.

The councillor answers with a certain enthusiasm.

-Yes, yes of course my lord, the cult of Monsanto is one of the numerous cults of good deities that are authorized in the Empire. You see, if elves have their pantheon and dwarves theirs humans of our land pray to a multitude of gods, more than a thousand, there is a god for each thing. For example Charal is the god of venison and Alaharm the protector of doors.

-Paganism !

Exclaims your brave brother templar and your men at arms agree, you nod, agreeing with them, but ask Oldfossil to continue. He does it with a scholarly tone.

-Most of these gods do not have priests, some of them have a small clergy but the twenty four most powerful gods, Monsanto is one of them, have their clergy recognized and the leaders of these churches have the right to vote for Imperial Laws in the Council of Many. The cult of Monsanto is not very centralized, they maintain temples and have a small force of men at arms but they are at the disposition of the Great Priests of each vassal kingdom, or each Duchy. And these great priests are elected by the priests in the temples, like yours. The Great Priests organise their theological schools and they elect one of them to sit in the Council of Many. Our local priest is called Father Pesticide, he is quite virulent, and leads the sacrifices of goats and cows to ensure a bountiful harvest. He is helped by two apprentice priests, a male, a young Minotaur called Disciple Insecticide and a female human called Disciple Fertilizer.
Some villagers say that accepting Minotaurs in the clergy is bad because they are an evil race but our priest believes in tolerating them.

Minotaurs you think, seems like a Greek name. You do not trust the greeks, these bastards have taken back Constantinople and they refuse to bow to the pope ! Greek priests can not be considered true priests and you think that maybe you could use that fact in this strange pagan religion too. Before your men can complain about this whore goddess Monsanto you ask a new question.

-Tell me more about the politics of our lordship, you talked about a liege lord ?

>>5091486

Both Oldfossil and Captain Crumbling looked at each other with worry. It was a quite hard subject for them to talk about apparently, but the old councillor said, after taking more beer.

-Yes my lord, we have a liege lord, Baron Crook Wickedson rules the Baronny of Thisplace. I will be honest my lord, and if I am sure he has no spies here I shall speak in hushed tones. He is not a good ruler, he is a cruel, wicked and depraved man, he loves torturing those that anger them and is very powerful. He is a Warlock, he passes pacts with demons... And we cannot denounce him because it is authorized by the Mages Guild and his uncle is the personal Chancellor of the King, or more exactly of the Queen of Bifuria. It is known that he wants to confiscate the Local Lordship. If we had not found you we would be under the direct rule of this man...

You do the sign of the cross and your brave and young Bohémond stands and says.

-We shall get the head of this bastard, he is unfit to rule !

You tell him to calm down and ask a new question.

-But we are not alone, is he ? I mean, there is other vassals of this baron Crook Wickedson ?

Oldfossil answers.

-Yes, we are the fourth vassal of the Baron of Thisplace, it means that we are the fourth most powerful vassal of the baron. There is seven vassals in total, three stronger than us and three weaker. Together they have as much land as the baron.

He begins to describe them all.

-The most powerful is the Neutral Lord, Swiss Neutralsson, Lord of Neutral he is from an old noble line and fears Baron Crook so he stays out of all conflicts and make his demesne prosper, his castle is one of the two vassal castles in the south of the barony with entries in the Underworld, no, do not look me like this, it is not hell but a great cave network that is very rich in minerals. The other one with this entries is the Rival Lord, Salty Rival, Lord of Rival, from an old family too, but he has a blood feud with us. He wants our lands and he is reinforcing the Hostil Lordship for this reason. But he is in the south of the Barony so relatively far away. The third one is the Special Lord, it is actually a lady, Princess Mary of house Sue, she is the forgotten daughter of a princely family from the capital and they have bought her this demesne because she is insufferable. Then there is us, of course, and weaker than us we have three lords.

He sips a bit of beer before continuing.

>>5091487

-The Darkplace Lord is actually Creepy Bitchson, he was a commoner once, but Baron Wickedson rewarded him with a fief for his loyalty. He is a member of the assassin's guild and is an awful man. It is said that he uses his land to train assassins and that he made the lord of Takable disappear. Then there is the Hostil Lord, our neighbour, it was a commoner too, a magician, but he was given the lordship instead of our lord just to spite us by Wickedson. He is a man of great ambitions and wants to take our fief by force with the help of the Rival Lord. And then there is the Takable Lord, who is also a lady, the last daughter of Lord Very Takable who was killed after he tried to petition the count against some of the new taxes risen by the Baron. Practically all his lands were taken by the baron, only the intervention of the count, who knew him, forbade this.

Well, it was a dark place indeed, so you asked.

-You talked about the Mages Guild, what are they ? Some cabal of demon worshippers ?

Oldfossil laughed.

-No, they are not, even if they are a powerful organisation. They have some seats on the Council of Many and they have an absolute monopoly on magic throughout the Empire. All the court wizards are from their ranks, all the adventurers wizards too, they have a monopoly on teleportation too, and alliances with the Adventurer's Guild, some orders of paladins and they are the closest councillors of the Emperor. And let's not forget that they control the Norin Security Array.

-What is this devilish thing ?

-It is a tower my lord, an enchanted tower in the kingdom of Norin that controls a network of towers everywhere around the empire and detects all manifestations of magic to better answer to these attacks.

You understood what it means, you remembered the court of Philippe le Bel. There were two groups of people led by two important men, the brother of the king Charles de Valois who ruled with the barons and the councillor Enguerrand de Marigny who ruled with shopkeepers. If the king was a king of iron his councillors assembled factions to try to influence him. You were a nobleman so naturally you had sympathy for Charles de Valois, feudal privileges shall be restored ! The good customs of the time of Saint Louis were excellent ! The right to mint your own coins ! The right to wage private wars ! This was what needed a strong realm : a strong feudal aristocracy ! And this magicians were no better than shopkeepers, a nuisance trying to infringe on your rights ! To hell with them.
The dinner will be soon finished but you have still time to ask for precisions about something that Oldfossil said.

>You can ask one question about this text, I will let you write and vote and your favourite question will be answered.

>>5091491
>Tell me more about Lady Takable, Lady Mary of Sue, and this Hostil Lord.

>>5091491
>M-magic, what manner of magic! Be specific, what can these devil-worshippers do?

>>5091491
>”Tell me about the emperor!”

>4 posts in the same minute
What manner of sorcery is this?

>>5091617
Support

Nothing more aristocratic than a political marriage

>>5091491
>Tell me more about Lady Takable, Lady Mary of Sue, and this Hostil Lord.

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>>5091617
>>5091620
>>5091621
>>5091626
>>5091650
>>5091725

You knew that relationships with neighbours were always very important. If your neighbours hated you need to be prepared for an attack. So you asked quickly.

-Tell me more about Lady Takable, Lady Mary of Sue, and this Hostil Lord.

The old man agrees, and tells what he knows about them.

-Lady Rose Takable is the only child of Lord Very Takable, a friend of our good Lord Random. This man was a skilled hunter and a great friend of Count Careless, the liege lord of our Baron. Lord Very Takable denounced the excesses of Baron Crook's rule to the Count one year ago, and he got killed three months after that, someone slit his throat in his sleep while he slept in a camp during a hunt. Knowing that the uncle of Baron Wicked is councillor of the king Count Careless could not do anything. So Baron Crook used the pretext of the fact that his seventeen years old daughter was unfit to rule to take the lands of the Takables. But Count Careless forbade him to take everything so Lady Takable still has her castle and a village in the north west of the barony. She is a very beautiful lady and she plays the harp like a great artist. We suppose that she hates the Baron with all her strength but she is too young, weak, and inexperienced to unbalance his rule. Lot's of people fear to marry her because it will anger the baron. She technically has rights to all her former demesne, the biggest of all the vassals of the Barony before Crook's confiscations.

A charming lady indeed, and maybe a useful ally you think. He then continues.

-Lady, or Princess, Mary of house Sue is young too, and very beautiful. She is the lost daughter of a Princely house from the capital, one of the houses that have been elected emperors in the past. It gave her the courtesy title of "princess" even if she is a lady. She has been raised by the elves and is said to have been "touched by fate", she is skilled with the sword and ran off at 15 years old from her foster family to seek adventure. She is said to have defeated the Hydras of the Smelly Swamp and the Dark Elf leader Famoes Troubleraiser and many other deeds in only three years of adventure. Then she found her old family who recognized her and one month with her family was enough for them to deduce that she was insupportable. They bought her a gift for her 18th birthday : a lordship in our forgotten province of the Empire. Now she has to rule but she seems to be bored by it. Her territory neighbours the one of Lord Hostil. She is known to be stubborn and to oppose serfdom, and not wanting to marry, she says she is a "strong independent woman".

You raise your eyebrows, how can she be independent if she has a liege lord ? And her opinion make her a good patient for a madhouse but you have not to hear everything that women says. If we begin to pay attention to the opinions of women we will be dead in a generation. The councillor continues about Lord Hostil.

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>>5091769

-Lord Hostil is a wizard, a powerful wizard who received a lordship with two villages just next to ours. He has been given this by the Rival Lord whose father has bought this villages from the father of Baron Crook when he needed money. The Hostil Lord is a powerful ally of the Rival Lord and he wants our lands, fortunately we have more men at arms than him and a defensive alliance with the Neutral Lord to counter his alliance with the Rival lord. He is said to be a rude man, a deceitful and vicious man. He feared our court wizard, Rollarion McFumble and did not dare to attack but when he will learn of his death he will surely try to test our strength. I think he will be very interested in you in a week or two when you will come to the court of the Baron to swear allegiance to him.

Brother Louis exclaims.

-Swearing allegiance to a demon worshipper ! He will only receive our swords in the gut, no allegiance for him !

You raise a hand to tell him to be silent and say.

-Do not worry Brother Louis, a word given to a demon worshipper is like a word given to a commoner, it has no value at all.

He nods, and the brave Godefroi says, smiling.

-And some wizard tricks cannot stand against good steel and the power of the holy cross ! We will show this man that no throwing of salt and no maledictions can harm true Christians !

You cheer, it was well said ! You have seen magicians do some tricks and they were not particularly useful on a field of battle, if you have more men, and better men, you will win easily. But it was late and time to gather some strength.

>Sleep alone
>Ask for Stacy to "warm your bed"
>Take a look at the stars before going to bed

>>5091770
>Ask for Stacy to "warm your bed"
>Take a look at the stars before going to bed

>>5091770
>>Ask for Stacy to "warm your bed"

>>5091770
>>Ask for Stacy to "warm your bed"

Lady takable will come later

>>5091770
>Ask for Stacy to "warm your bed".

>>5091770
>Ask for Stacy to "warm your bed"
Where would we be without prima nocta?

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>>5091781
>>5091800
>>5091821
>>5091828
>>5091873

You go to bed and ask for the maid Stacy to be brought to your chambers. She comes inside and you are, as before, impressed by her curves and the smoothness of her skin. She seems shy at the beginning but let's be honest, when you begin to give in to the joys of love you are impressed. If some women here wore armor this Stacy clearly has the stamina to do so. Of course modesty will forbid your poor narrator to tell you everything about your night with this dove eyed beauty but it was an excellent night indeed.
The next day you awake joyful and ready. What do you do ?

>Directly order to bring the priests of Monsanto to you
>See how your main train
>Take a look at the village of Local
>Other (Write in...)

====

**Charles de Villeroi**

**Class** : Local Lord
**Level** : 1
XP : 0+20 (for your initial acts and for taking control of your fief)

**Stats**

Combat : 50%
Intrigue : 25%
Rulership: 30%

Piety : 18-1 =17 (Sin of the flesh)

Mudcore : 14+1=15 (Nobles must be hedonists while the peasantry dies in mud), next level at 10 or 20, the more you act accordingly to the meme of the local lord the more this stat will be high.

With 15 Mudcore you have a small field of gritty realism around you, in this field the most heavy magic will not work and supernatural abilities will not work, oh, and women will lose 4 pounds of strength of course.

**Talents**
Cavalry Commander : +20 to martial when you have to lead a cavalry charge or a cavalry attack. Works only when commanding shock or melee cavalry mounted on horses.