Well, this can only be good.

I wanna play an 8 year old samurai catgirl. Is that ok?

>>16175049
>dyJCat VILE

Goddamn right, Captcha.

>>16175049
Go back to china, you zipperhead motherfucker.

>>16175049

God damn gooks.

MANCRUSH ACTIVATED

So, Mr. Eastwood, what kind of adventure will be undertaking tonight?

>>16175072

You'll being kill space-gooks for the Emperor.

I want to play a rogue, Clint. What level we starting at? What stat array?

>>16175056
>dyJCat VILE
>Dyj Catvile

This is still the name of my next PC.

>>16175082
Dark Heresy?

>>16175082

Clint, you're a horrible DM.

Come, /tg/. Let me take you on an adventure.

>>16175056
I finally saw that movie.
Oh God it was great.


>Eastwood is going to be directing DiCaprio in J Edgar this fall
>allofmymoney.jpg.

Seriously, fuck the Man With No Name. Eastwood is a brilliant director.

>>16175027
>>16175107
>>16175027
>>16175107
>>16175027

Awesome overload
>>16175107

>>16175107
I love the sound of your voice...tell me more.

>>16175107
Fuck off, Morgan, it's Clint's night to DM, don't be a dick. We agreed on this schedule a long time ago.

>>16175118

He directed Space Cowboys. How could you even consider that he isn't a brilliant director?

>>16175139

All we ever do is kill space-gooks. Or space-zipperheads.

>>16175153
Then maybe when it's your night to DM we can play something else, Morgan. Come on, killin' commie space gooks is fun.

Just one night, I want to play with Morgan bitching about Clint's DM's. Nobody says you have to play, Morgan.

>>16175172
*without
>Jesus, I can't type tonight...

>>16175153

If you don't like it, you can take your old spook ass down the road.

Hey guys can we play D&D 4th edition?

>>16175192
>>16175172
>>16175169

God is tired of killing space-gooks, and tired of Clint Eastwood's shitty DM nights.

>>16175192
>you can take your old spook ass down the road

Pic very related.

Where did we put the snacks, guys?

>>16175210
God damn it, Michael.

>>16175172
>>16175192
>>16175210
>>16175219

OH GOD THE VOICES

>>16175210
Weren't you supposed to go out with Juno tonight? Or did her prego crazy-juices drive you away, finally?

I came here to invite /tg/ to a game, and you bastards ruined it.

Who's DPS in this campaign again? I'm too tired to remember.
I was up all night raiding.

Wait, what do you mean I can't play a female half-Eldar Arbites? Look, it says so right here, the Ultramarines had a half-Eldar psyker, and they're clearly the best chapter, so GW would double check their fluff.

Can I play a multiclassing barbarian? No, it's not fetish fuel.

>>16175257
Not mine or Liam's fault. Get on with it, Clint. We're ready to game.

>>16175252

Hey man, fuck you. I don't care if you're older, I'll knock you out. I'm fucking tired of your bullshit every goddamn session. 4th edition is way more developed and obviously superior.

Good sheeing you gentsh, I've rolled a dwarf ash ushual.

>>16175304
Mikey, we told you to shut your mouth once, we won't tell again.

Anyways, Clint, I'm playing an assassin.

>>16175304
Careful, son. You're about to write a check you hairless ass can't cash.

>>16175323

Playing a dwarf means you're trying to compensate for something.

>>16175299

Let him walk away so we can play a good game.

>>16175323

Oh for f... which one of you dried-up oldfags invited the wifebeater?

How can you still be such n00bs when you're as old as you are? GOD!

>>16175336

Not a bard?

Ah, good, we're all here.
I...was actually hoping for a chance to run this race I found in a book past you, Clint.
They're sort of like...hobbits. Except they like stealing things. And they think that's alright.
I think it's a really interesting angle, myself.

>>16175357
Sometimes a man likes to get away from the spotlight for a spell. Me, I like to do it when I'm throwin' dice with friends.

>>16175348
And playing an elf makesh you a boy-lover. It'sh not my fault I prefer bonushes to Shtrength and Conshtitution.

>>16175352
Do you kish your mother with that mouth, boy?

>>16175369
THIS IS WHY WE CAN'T HAVE NICE GAMES, DAVID.

>>16175369
You need to stop running around the '80's, doctor. It's not healthy.

>>16175385
>>16175384
I'm sorry, I'm so sorry.
I guess I'll go roll up another elf ranger or something

>>16175384
Brian Bleshed! Perhapsh thish sheshion can be shaved after all!

>>16175377

Eugh. Okay, here's the deal. I don't give two shits what you guys do, but I'm going to play a Dragonborn Sorc, so there had better be some Controllers in the party.

>>16175409
Good one, Sean!

>>16175407
You shee, David? Boy-lover. It'sh that John Barrowman fellow, he'sh a bad influensh. Be a real man and play a dwarf, or at leasth a half-orc.

>>16175409

It was ruined when we made Clint GM.

>>16175421
I aim to pleashe, Neeshon.

>>16175418
Why not just play a character you like, Mikey? Step away from the numbers and play a character. That's what's wrong with gamers these days, I swear.

This thread is full of people I would play a game with.

>>16175418
Oh for God'sh shake, are we allowing shcaliesh in thish party now?

>>16175418
Fine, Michael, you can play a sorcerer. I rolled a decent charisma, so I guess I'll take bard.

So I was thinking of rolling another neutral good human fighter, guys.

>>16175424

Is this because your paladin was killed? I warned you plenty of times, but you kept insisting your faith would see through.

Your faith rewarded you with a one, jackass.

>>16175424
God damn it, Morgan, are you still going on with that? You don't have to play Dark Heresy if you don't want to.

>>16175407
At least you're honest about lovin' men, David.

>>16175460

No, no, NO. I want to have the highest charisma!
Clint, make him reroll! Liam always copies me! I want to be the negotiator. I have high charisma and I am chaotic neutral so I can get what the party needs!

>>16175455
I left the coke upstairs with your junkie mother, Braff. Tell her to brush her teeth next time.

Hey guys, sorry I'm late, but I have my character all rolled up I won't delay anything and you all know I make an awesome bard.

>>16175476
Shee, Frank, you know what I'm shpeaking about. Damn elvesh.

>>16175498

What about half-elf?

>>16175476
>>16175423
Right, because I'm not the guy rolling giant musclebound men. Clearly that makes ME the homosexual.

>>16175494
Neeshon'sh the bard, Fillion. Be a Rogue inshtead or shomething.

>>16175505
Bishexual.

>>16175492

I'll crush your fucking skull, you fucking paddy faggot. Won't need but my own two hands. You want to bring it, faggot? Maybe bring all of your faggot-ass nerd friends in on this, too? I could do with the goddamn exercise.

>>16175528

You're going to start this shit during my game?

>>16175481
You can't be the face, Michael.Your a girl.

Hey, come on. Let's stop all this crap and roll some dice. I'll just take my rightful place as Dungeon Master here. What edition are we playing? I'd prefer first edition, personally.

>>16175494
Glad to see you could make it, Nathan. Was worried you wouldn't show.

>>16175513
I'm an assassin, so I've got stealth covered, but we could use a rogue for the utility.

>>16175513
Actually, I figured we'd have some overlap within the group. That's why I picked up that feat that makes my Bardic effects untyped bonuses for purposes of performing with other bards. Besides, this way we could have a viable cover for the party as a traveling band! We may need to buy a caravan or a ship, though...

>this thread
In their voices. Every single one of them.

>>16175528
It's cool, Clint. Let the dog bark. He knows his mom will take the xbox if he picks a fight with his future ex-stepdad.

>>16175542
;_;

too soon, man, too soon.

>>16175538

Well... well... Fuck you! Fuck all you guys! I'm out!
I didn't want to play with you anyway!

If you'll excuse me, I'll just go and have totally awesome and slightly awkward nerdy sex with Juno. Something you wrinkly old VIRGINS wouldn't know anything about!

Fucking oldfag neckbeards.

Maybe after I've plowed Juno, I'll play some WoW. A real fucking game, none of this pen-and-paper bullshit.

>>16175542
"Rightful place"? You scheming son of a bitch, you owe everything to me!

>>16175547

This is why I like you. You always know what you're fucking doing.

Oh, so we're finally starting?
I roll to seduce the barmaid.

>>16175547
Sho what doesh that make my fighter, a shecurity guard?

>>16175542
Sorry, Gary. Little Mikey's being a litlte bitch.

>>16175547
Clever as always, Nathan. Well, I'm sold on the idea, but who's going to cover utility? I know Mikey's just going to try and do as much damage as possible so there's no way he'll do it.

>>16175566

Shut up, Dave. There's a reason why when I went Advanced you went Basic.

>>16175571
The sherving boy ish more up your alley, David.

>>16175574

I love you bastards. I really do.

Even Morgan, the spook.

Hey guys, hey guys - can I play as well?

>>16175599
Wait, wait, shtop the game, I think she'sh ashking what we want in our shandwichesh.

I'll have a hot pashtrami, and a bottle of whishkey.

>>16175598
Where'd Morgan go, anyway?Did that fuckhead Zach scare him off?

>>16175599

Well hello there...

>>16175573
Sound like a decent cover story. I'm not all too sure what to do with my assassin. Maybe producer? I've got some ranks in haggle and bluff, I could make it work.

>>16175615

"Clint's game is bullshit.

Love,
Morgan "YHWH" Freeman"

>>16175619
What are you shtill doing here, you nanshy-boy?

Michael, what the fuck?

>>16175612

Wake up gramps it's 2011, we gamer chicks rule the scene - I even have my own webshow.

>>16175619

Hey Michael - I LOVE the great dramatic range you can pull off, I bet you are a great roleplayer

>>16175627
Good, I was getting sick of his bitching, anyway.

>>16175612
Be quiet, Sean.

>>16175599
Of course you can, dollface. Why don't you come sit down over here. I've got some congac you might like. Have you ever played D&D? I can give you a show of the basics.

rolled 6, 3, 1 = 10

>>16175619

You, stop being a problem player. Take 3d6 damage.

>>16175637
>>16175615
Not sure. Should I call Harrison? He's always wanted to play with us but we've never had a free spot.

>>16175599
What?
No, we've already got a group. Get lost.
Like I was saying, roll to seduce the stabl-uh, barmaid

>>16175636

What? No. Fuck that noise. Get the fuck out.

MICHAEL. Eyes over here, goddamnit.

Look, if you guys are that desparate for a girl to play, I'll play.

>>16175573
Sean, with how much I've whored out my Inspire Confidence bonuses, we could not only pass you off as the lead singer. And my social skills are so strong I could trick people into thinking you're sober. At. The. Same. Time.

You could be anything you want to be, baby! My job is making EVERYBODY look good!

>>16175642
That's why I like you, Gary! You put the dogs down when they get too loud.

>>16175640
Felicia doesn't want cognac, Frank. She needs a little "irish cream". You understand?

>>16175656
Just make sure your water doesn't break on my pewter miniatures.

>>16175640

Why thank you Frank, that's so nice of you! I only played WoW so far - but this is supposed to be fairly similar, isn't it?

I want to play a Nightelf Rogue or Sorcerer or something. Look, I even brought my own costume

rolled 4, 5, 3 = 12

>>16175681

You take damage.

>>16175652
Caught you shlippin', you poof!

>>16175669
Not bad, Fillion. Cheersh.

>>16175681

It's totes like WoW, yeah. Listen, ignore these oldfags, I'll show you the ropes.

>>16175652

Hey, not cool David - What's wrong with you? Upset that Matt Smith is getting the smoking hot 20-something redhead while you had the nagging 40-something redhead?

>>16175696

I AM RIGHT HERE, MICHAEL.
The fuck do you think you're doing? You think you're a smooth operator now?

>>16175676
Have a little tact, Liam. That ain't no way for a man to speak in front of a lady.

>>16175681
Well, this ain't a LARP, hon', there ain't no need for costumes unless you wanna.

>>16175697
Nah, I'm perfectly fine killing Nazis while Smith acts the part of a gay Nazi-loving Jew.
I just don't want Cera's boner getting any more awkward than it already is.

>>16175692

Bu...but I haven't even rolled my character yet!

Hallo, gentleman.

Mind if I join this game?

rolled 18 = 18

This is why I never invited women to roll with us.

>>16175027

I'm going to have to politely ask that you and your boyfriend leave the table.

>>16175723

>>16175722

You die. Forever.

>>16175696
I didn't know you were a lesbian, Mikey!

>>16175716
Always a gentleman, Frank. You're an exemplar to us all.

>>16175720
Killing vampires*
hurr

>>16175696
Like WoW... y'know, kid, you're actually kinda right. This party is kinda like a WoW guild. And what makes a good WoW guild? Teamwork! If the characters don't work well together, why have a guild?

... And also, if one player is being a bit of an asshat, why have him in the guild? It doesn't matter how useful the character is if nobody wants to deal with his childish chatspam.

Just chill a bit on the whole "I gotta prove myself to the guys" routine is all I'm saying - out-of-game synergy is just as important as in-game synergy kiddo.

>>16175722

GOOD.

Don't let the door hit you in the ass on the way out.

rolled 2, 5, 5 = 12

>>16175754

You also die.

>>16175696

That's so cool - What should I roll?

>>16175716

Well, I already brought it along - so why not. And this isn't the same as LARPs? I never knew!

>>16175729
Well shpoken, Eashtwood. Let'sh get thish game shtarted already.

>>16175729
I'm startin' to understand what you mean, Clint. She don't even drink!

>>16175758

I wasn't even playing yet, old man.

I'm just here to take out the trash. That means you, you red-headed skank.

>>16175754

Why all the hate Page? You seriously got some issues, girl - you should get out of the closet already instead of hogging Michael all the time...

>>16175729
>>16175770
See, that's what I said.
Oh, but nobody EVER listens to David.

>>16175762
>>16175770
I agree, Clint! Tell the girls it's bedtime and let's get started.

Ghehe...

I've got chicks fighting over me. Do you guys have chicks fighting over you? 'Cuz I have chicks fighting over me.

>>16175786

We don't listen to you because you roll a damn elf.

>>16175786
You didn't want any girlsh becaushe you prefer looking at men inshtead.

Hey, men, here's an idea: Let's play OD&D and forget about those kids.
I've got the Greyhawk supplement right here for us to try out. Anyone here familiar with the system?

Hey guys is it cool if I sit in on this game?

So, apparently, the greatest DnD party would bicker all day instead of just rolling the damn dice.

>>16175797
Good idea, Frank. Right behind you.

>>16175811

Did you expect anything else?

>>16175780
>>16175783
I'm starting to like the direction this is going. Liam, help me get the beers out of my Royce, would you?

>>16175783

Oh that is it. Outside, right fucking now. We'll see who has issues!

>>16175809
Mercury. Take a sheat, you're alwaysh welcome here.

>>16175786
Oh, hey honey, sorry to call in the middle of your game night, but I can't make it home to meet the woman from the adoption agency to go over the nursery we put in thanks to this Torchwood shoot... would you be a dear and take care of that? You know how important it is to me for us to be able to adopt Lin Wong...

>>16175811
It's a performance piece. The way to NOT play a game,as portrayed by the people who you would WANT to play with!

>>16175817

Clint Eastwood leading the Emperor's Finest against Orks.

I expected that.

>>16175819

Hands off Page - I know that is some clever ploy of to get your hands all over me but I have bad news for you - I am not into you *snorts*...dyke!

>>16175805

Did he just say Greyhawk? I think he just said Greyhawk.
Looks like someone can't accept that he wrote an INFERIOR setting.

>>16175809
Of course, Freddie!

>>16175794
Quality over quantity, Mikey, you'll learn that someday.

The idiocy of you people - all your MTV pop culture has made your fuckin' minds feeble and weak.

Let's start playing already - I wanna cut up some whores in a spiritual, metaphysical way while reciting Blake and Milton

>>16175827
Tennant? Mind telling ush who that wash?

>>16175837

Hey.
Hey.
Fuck you, I never FINISHED writing it!
Forget Greyhawk, then. Men, roll your characters; we're taking on Castle Zagyg.

>>16175832
Man, Felicia... I had no idea you could stoop to baiting street trash into fights. I hope Molly Quinn doesn't see this, seeing as you're such a role model to her...

>>16175858

I want to be a half-orc cleric.

>>16175832

Let's not get too hasty. I'm sure the THREE of us can work something out.

>>16175852
Who invited comic Beardy McDeepenstein?

>>16175858

You'd best be joking, 'dungeon master'.

>>16175852
Alan shut the fuck up. You always bitch about how shallow the story is and when ever you DM you make up some shitty pretentious bullshit.

>>16175862

Hey sorry Nathan but she totally started it - I just wanted to play some of this offline-WoW and be friends with everyone but she had to behave like that!

Please don't think bad about me...

>>16175866

Shut up Michael!

>>16175857
Uh, wrong address. Don't worry about it.
>>16175827
Really, REALLY can't now. I'll handle it later, trust me.

>>16175869

He stalked me here, I'm sorry.

>>16175858
Why is it always dungeon delving with you? Give us a game we can explore our characters in, Gary.

>>16175873
Right, you pish off before we make you.

>>16175864

Alright, how green are you?

>>16175873

I'd like to see you last three turns in Zagyg!

>>16175869

Well, I am sorry I didn't sell out to George Lucas, that corporate wanker just because he parked a garbage truck full of money in my driveway Liam

Oh for god's sake, fuck this shit.

And fuck you, too, MICHAEL. We're through!

>>16175884

I want to explore your dick in my mouth.

>>16175866
Mikey, would you shut your mouth and let the girls fight? Just get yourself a beer and be quiet.

>>16175887

He ACTUALLY thinks that means it's a good setting. Who let this guy DM, seriously?

>>16175884

Reminds me...

We still doing that "thing" for your character for the development?

>>16175893
>>16175878

Hey, what? No! My threesome! Come on, you guys!

>>16175893

Oh god Ellen, I am so sorry - I didn't mean it like that. You're a great actress I am totally your biggest fan!

Really Michael, what's up with you? You don't even step up to defend your girlfriend!?

>>16175884

I don't see why you can't do both. There's a lot to be said about the personality of someone who bravely goes deep into an unknown castle, potentially under-prepared.

>>16175889
Because the Warner Brothers are so much nicer overlords.

Just go back to Narnia, or Oz, or wherever your neuroses takes you, and letthe men getback to their game. Bad enough Little Mikey brought his harpies with him.

>>16175898
Not shure he'sh old enough to drink, Shinatra.

>>16175880
I wash right about you, washn't I, you closheted poof?

Oh god Ellen, I am so sorry - I didn't mean it like that. You're a great actress I am totally your biggest fan!

Really Michael, what's up with you? You don't even step up to defend your girlfriend!? You're such a loser, just like in your movies...

>>16175889
And that's why Liam and I and everyone else present can afford threads that don't make us look like a hobo.

>>16175910

Ex-girlfriend.

>>16175908
Oh boy. I can tell you this isn't going to end very well.

>>16175903

Oh, come on, Wood. I'd like to see YOU revolutionize gaming like I did!

>>16175903
You're not any better, Greenwood. There's not a single rock in all Faerûn that doesn't have a three-chapter backstory explaining its relationship to at least three gods, Elminster, and that goddamn drow.

Now, I don't know about anyone else, but I'm here for CLINT'S game. I mean, c'mon guys... I was late getting here, but at least I got here ready to go. Can we please get started?

>>16175923
Perhapsh you need shomeone with more exshperienshe, eh, lash?

>>16175923

Ain't no thang. You ain't nuttin' but GAHBAGE anyway. Yer USED GOODS.

This is a good thread.

But what if Clint actually does play DnD?

>>16175931
Apparently not, we've been an hour and a half now.

(image limit reached. It's all downhill, gentlemen...)

>>16175949

Seems like he'd be more of an Aces and Eights fan.

>>16175908
Of course, Clint. You thought it sounded pretty neat, didn't you?

>>16175926
Oh, shut up David, you hate backstories that include as little as a character name.

>>16175931
I'm ready to game as soon as everyone else is.

I can't believe I saved twenty pictures of Liam Neeson for this thread...

>>16175962
Yesh, I've got my dishe. Let'sh begin.

>>16175975
Yeah, I got enough of Frankie to make a permanent moniker of it.

>>16175975

Could have just let the thread die.

>>16175975
My hard drive, I think, has been enriched by the increase in Nathan Fillion pictures. Also, that one pic of John Barrowman.

>>16175983
But it was a fun ride, why would we do that?

>>16175992

As an observer, it would have been better if the group had been more centralized and stuck with the actual actors personalities/stereotyped characters. As well as played the game. Maybe try again for the entertainment of all?

>>16176006
Another time, maybe. I'm tired and am going to sleep.

>>16176006

Fuck you and what you want, gook.

I'm sleeping.

>>16176006
That would a make fun game in itself. Four guys playing famous people trying to play dnd? Sounds like a good evening-killer to me.

Personally, I'd just as soon let this thread die gracefully. It was fun being a chauvinist shit-talking Liam Neeson, but I think this horse needs to be put to
pasture.

Someone archive this shit.

>>16176054
It's done.
http://suptg.thisisnotatrueending.com/archive/16175027/