rolled 47 = 47

Let's do this.

Flying bicycle attack, operation PHONE HOME is a go.

rolled 21 = 21

>>18119489
FOR TEA AND HONOR!

rolled 10 = 10

>>18119500
i think we only need a d20

MAY MY BLADE STRIKE TRUE

rolled 94 = 94

>>18119510

We've been using hundies this whole quest.

No reason to change now.

>>18119500

>PHONE HOME

I laughed.

>>18119514

Imma stop, because I'm not doing better than that.

Also, don't worry guys, we have a solid plan of attack in the works using the finest minds available.

>>>/sci/4410356

It gets the jump on you.
A few dry leaves on its roof get caught by a breeze and drift menacingly towards you and Perrinne.
You dodge just in time.

"What are you doing?" she asks you.
But you don't reply. You have no time for words.
THE FIGHT IS ON.

You throw a knife towards it.
***ROLL FOR ATTACK***

rolled 77 = 77

>>18119537
Like the fist of the northern star!!!

rolled 8 = 8

>>18119537
TO THE DEATH!

rolled 88 = 88

>>18119537
Seriously? We're attacking the Gazebo?
Was it the air raid siren that went off, or the general base alert siren?

>>18119549
It doesn't even try to evade your attack. As if mocking your strength.
The knife buries itself into a wooden pillar.
It seems unfazed.

You attack again.

"No, seriously. WHAT ARE YOU DOING?" Perrine yells over the blaring sirens.

The knife hits the roof, dislodging a shingle.
'FINALLY,' you think to yourself. 'YOU FLINCH'

you enlarge a knife and charge in.

***ROLL FOR ATTACK***

rolled 76 = 76

I DON'T EVEN KNOW WHAT'S GOING ON!

rolled 14 = 14

>>18119582
Ugh. Here's to getting through this sequence so we can either fight a real Martian infiltrator, or find out why the alarm was raised.

rolled 20 = 20

>>18119582
LET'S KILL THE INHUMAN BASTARD!

>>18119596
The base's alarm was raised and we discovered that the area we were in contained one of the land's most feared and powerful enemies, the Dread Gazebo. It swallows lesser men whole, and peerlessly infiltrates cities and towns, where it waits to attack.

I fucking hate Gazebos.

>>18119582
SLAY THE FOUL BEAST

rolled 19 = 19

>>18119582
Kill the Gazebo, so we can ram the castle on a looted bike!

rolled 40 = 40

>>18119624
Fucking dice how do they work.

In case anyone is confused:
http://www.duke.edu/web/DRAGO/humor/gazebo.html

>>18119596
"HAVE AT THEE!"
Your knife/saber chops through a wooden support. Emboldened by this, you strike again.
2 pillars go down in a single cleave.
I'ts reeling now. You only have to finish the job
You run to the middle and aim for its heart.

**ROLL FOR Coup de grâce**

Hope we don't meet a Gong.

rolled 2 = 2

>>18119656
DIE MONSTER

rolled 92 = 92

>>18119656
Death to the gazebo!

Then turn around and butle the fuck out of Perrinne again

rolled 76 = 76

>>18119656
>You run to the middle and aim for its heart.
...Air heart?

Fuck yeah, let's slice and dice the invisible and intangible heart!

rolled 81 = 81

>>18119656
FOR COITUS AND WITCHES

rolled 11 = 11

>>18119656
We're going owe the Witches a new gazebo after this.

>>18119683
A more benevolent one, this time.

>>18119661
YOU STRIKE PURE AND TRUE.
Your knife/saber plunges itself deep into the floor.
It now sits there lifeless. It's wooden husk devoid of life.
You walk back to the lady you bravely fought for.

"WHY WOULD YOU DO THAT TO A PERFECTLY GOOD GAZEBO?! Look the roof is listing now."
She tells you angrily.
"Merde. JUST COME WITH ME YOUR RETARD. I need to get you to somewhere safe."

What the actual fuck.

rolled 28 = 28

>>18119700
See
>>18119629

>>18119706
I know *that*, I mean why are we doing it?

>>18119697

Now is the time for the bicycle plan.

Also, why the fuck did we just attack a Gazebo?

Please tell me this is just you fucking with us.

>>18119716
Because it is what we derped into during the last threads post game discussion

>>18119716
For the same reason that we've got the Doctor, Kamen Rider, Nanoha, Madoka, Sakura, a Gorilla, Santa Claus and The Bartender on staff.

>>18119697
>>18119706
>>18119717
>>18119716

Dammit, this was a good quest.

Then we thrashed a gazebo for no fucking reason,

rolled 33 = 33

>>18119729
You're right.
Not it's a FABULOUS QUEST!

>>18119729
Stop being so melodramatic.

This is our random derp for the evening and worse ideas have come than wrecking a gazebos shit

>>18119721

We were plotting a bicycle dog-fight.

ONE DUDE made a joke about a Gazebo.

ONE. And he was IGNORED. Because it was FUCKING RETARDED.

>>18119743
Plus, it deserved it.

>>18119729
I don't know, Hayate's parents probably invested in the damn things and he nearly lost his eyes or something like that.

I should say that I haven't read whatever this is based on.

rolled 37 = 37

>>18119748
>no_fun_allowed.jpg

She pulls you along into a hangar.
Inside you see the witches jumping into their striker units as Minna discusses the situation.

"A martian ship just lifted out of the water near here. it's another one of those goddamn sleepers."
"It appears to be a headed inland, and will pass directly over us."
"We will try and intercept it before it gets to the base."

From another hangar you see the p61 roll onto the tarmac and prep for take-off.

As it lifts off several witches fly after it.
"Just stay here." Perrinne says as she heads off to her own striker unit.

>>18119748
Because bicycle dogfighting is actually any less retarded?

I mean I could of done without the gazebo but I still found it funny

Also search the remains of our vanquished foe for loot. Maybe some gear will fall out of it, or it will show it's true form since we killed it

rolled 71 = 71

>>18119762
>"Just stay here."
Hahaha. She's funny.
Saucer up, let's kick some alium ass.

>>18119759

One guy making an off joke outside the normal bounds of the thread resulting in us doing something extremely stupid that will only impact us negatively.

When we could be doing something INSANE like dog-fighting on a bicycle.

And that's no fun allowed?

Seriously?

>>18119762
NOPE

We are either finding a bike or surfing the p61 into that fight...

Or maybe jumping the bike onto the p61 then continuing on to wreck shit and serve tea

>>18119762
>"Just stay here."
Oh hell no.
PUT ON ANOTHER PAIR OF PANTS AND GET IN THE AIR
AND AVIATORS

>>18119775
Just drop it and move on already.

Do not want another fucking shinku/lily bitchfest

rolled 24 = 24

>>18119786
Whoops forgot to roll.

Alright guys, the Gazebo thing was horrible and pointless, but you're getting WAAAY too worked up about it.

>>18119762

I was going to say that we should do the bicycle plan, but now I'm thinking somebody with obvious brain-damage shouldn't be trying something that risky.

Now might be a good time to play it safe.

>>18119803
We don't play it safe because that's boring though.

Anyway we can use our majaik now so if anything goes wrong we can use a saucer

Flashback time.

=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=
You still remember it to this very day.
You were in school when the typhoon rolled in.
The howling winds and blasting rain wreaking havoc on the town you lived in.

Parent's picked up their children to keep the safe from the storm, and in no time everyone was on their way home.
EXCEPT FOR YOU.
A teacher hands you a cheap umbrella, saying "Here, you go on home. I don't want to get wet."

And thusly equipped, you braved your way home.
The tiny umbrella fought the winds bravely to try and keep you dry. But the fury of the typhoon was too much for it.

As you neared a park a gust of wind ripped off it's skin. Leaving you drenched and defenseless.
You ran to the nearest cover you could find.
There, near some trees you find an old worn down gazebo. Its roof offering some safety from the raging storm.

You head in and attempt to wait it out.
The freezing winds and torrential rain blasted the gazebo, but it held. You thought you were safe.

A LOUD CRACK OF LIGHTNING.
A tree falls on its roof and it begins to cave-in.
Inside, you can only watch in horror as what you thought would be your savior began to close down on you.

Two days later they found you in the mangled remains of the wooden structure.
The rescue workiers still remember your screams as they dug you out.
"HELP! IT'S EATING ME! IT'S EATING ME!"

>>18119820
Aaaand now the gazebo fight is awesome.

>>18119820
I can never tell if these are actually from the real canon or not but they always crack me up for some reason

>>18119820
>daily dose of PTSD
This quest is a good quest.

>>18119838
None from cannon, but they fit in with what little we know of his childhood.

Misfortune+ uncaring adults +trauma

You look around and quickly observe the situation
You see mechanics prepping hoses and pails for possible bailouts.
You see medics set up a table and ready medical supplies.


The twins run into the hangar.
"There you are!" Erica says. "Stay with Ursula, I need to get airborne."

She materializes her striker units and guns, no doubt stored within Frau, and takes off.

She quickly vanishes into the sky.
Ursula pulls you along to the medical section and you help them to set up.

[ ]make potion
[ ]organize bandages
[ ]talk

>>18119862
[x] spam healing potions

>>18119862
Make rebounder

>>18119862
>>18119870

Re-bounder first, then some healing potions.

>>18119862

Other

Summon saucer and take to the sky.

Time to play in Bullet Hell.

rolled 97 = 97

>>18119874
Give Ursula our flask filled with healing potions then make rebounder apply to bike and castle wall and PIERCE THE HEAVENS!

YOu begin to quickly create a lot of healing potions.
Taking one of the all too familiar plastic barrels you fill it with water from the mechanics' hose.

Stirring it with an enlarged spoon you do as Ryuu has taught you and finish a batch.
You point the barrel out to the medics, "if anyone needs any minor healing, give them these."
They raise a quisical eyebrow at you, but Ursula steps in.
"it's a healing potion. please just use it if needed." she says.

As you turn around to grab another barrel a man grabs you by the arm.
"kid, you can run past right?" he says
"take this to the Control tower. have them broadcast the message to all friendlies."

[ ]take message
[ ]stay for potions

>>18119904
>kid, you can run past right?
Time for bunnymode timestop I think.
[x] take the message

>>18119904
Take message

>>18119904

Take the Message, with all our ludicrous speed. The potions can take care of themselves now.

That said, we should sneak a look at the message en route to see what's up.

>>18119916
DURACELL BUNNY MESSENGER MODE

rolled 94 = 94

>>18119904
Bunny mode, timestop, fly like a bunny

rolled 98 = 98

>>18119862
Make potions. I like a bit of fun, just not derp.

Rereading the previous thread, I just want to point out a slight flaw in the "take to the skies" plan:

Say we do manage to successfully take out bike to the skies and put that Alium sleeper down. You know what will happen if we try to walk up to MC-Pilot and call him "Smalltime"?

He'll laugh in our face. Along with probably every witch within earshot.

Keep in mind, every single combatant in Castle Barin is an Ace, the one with the lowest killcount (at the moment) being Chuck Yeager hisself at 7, and the highest Erica at somewhere north of 370. MC-Pilot has around 10 kills at the moment, and that was in 1943, so it stands to reason that he has increased his count significantly in the time it took to end the Martian invasion.

And we intend to call him smalltime because we brute-forced our way into a single kill?

>inb4 nofunallowed.jpg

rolled 65 = 65

>>18119933
REFRESH, YOU HAVE THE LANDING GEAR SYNDROME

>>18119904
Is this another one of MC's pranks? I'd rather read the message before delivering it.

>>18119943
I think we were going more for quality over quantity.

rolled 23 = 23

I wonder if we're going to meet Mr Dresden, Harry. Wizard.

>>18119916
You run out of the hangar. pumping your legs as fast as you can, Mid-way to the tower you sneak a peak at the message
"fast hostiles coming in from west. need defenses at hq."

Seeing the urgency of the message you teleport the rest of the way there. After hearing the radio operator broadcast the same message on all channels. you head outside.

You ready your teapot and begin scanning the horizon.
"Erica, we have hostiles flanking the base." you tell her mentally.
"we just got the message, Ghostrider and three of use are going back for defense."

And then you spot them.

>>18119943

I'm really looking forward to getting out of witch castle since we're channeling way too much of SWQ.

>>18119959
Yeah, the Strike Witches bore me, personally.

>>18119950
So us simply brute-forcing with superior amounts if magic is supposed to be better somehow than subtle probability manipulation?

rolled 50 = 50

>>18119957
Ask Ursula if they'll be okay, and if you can join defence after finishing our potion

>>18119959
It is a nice diversion but I won't mind when we move on

rolled 34 = 34

>>18119965
Well, if you're powerful enough to punch through probability then you're likely quite decent.

>>18119965
You don't want to let it go do you? If you don't like it oppose it if it comes up otherwise how about we get back to the quest at hand

>>18119983
It needs to be killed now otherwise it's going to get written in. It's a stupid idea and it should have been smothered in its sleep.

You can't even begin to describe what they looked like. But you know one thing. They looked like trouble.

After visually confirming that these weren't human aircraft you aim your tealaser.

***ROLL FOR ANTI AIRCRAFT FIRE.***

rolled 89 = 89

>>18119999
Lets give the Martians a taste of 88mm Earl Grey.

>>18119993
And that's the sort of attitude that say NO FUN ALLOWED.

The point so far has been if people or god forbid the person running the quest wanted it then we can try it.

If you don't like it then when it is up for vote or discussion mention it, chances are even if we do try it we come out looking like a dick anyway so people will think about it a bit more carefully when it actually comes time to attempt it rather than in an post thread discussion

rolled 18 = 18

>>18119993
Hey buddy, I don't know if you've been paying attention, but LG tends to include things that get rolled for and ignore things that don't.
So how about, the next time he asks for a relevant roll, you suggest something constructive and roll a fucking die.
>>18119999
>dem quad nines
PYEW PYEW

rolled 23 = 23

>>18119999
Dice don't fail me now!

rolled 58 = 58

>>18119999
We need AA Plasma.

rolled 76 = 76

I'MMA CHARGIN MAH LASER!

>>18120017
>>18120016
Right, like the gazebo we just destroyed and will have to replace.

>>18120015
To try and conserve energy, you compress your laser into tight beams and fire sporadically.
After about a minute of firing with the intruders dodging and buzzing round your shots, you count 3 ships go down.

"Thanks for the fire support Teacakes. We'll take it from here." Erica says as she zooms across high above you.

You watch as three witches and a surprisingly agile p61 dogfight with the loads of Martian ships.

Erica with a methodical accuracy taking down one ship after another. You spot Lucchini bobbing around avoiding fire and blasting a few more.
You also see Perrine fighting in the air with what appears to be a sword.

The P61 joins the fray. It gets altitude and begins dropping like a rock. all guns blazing. This maneuver forces the ships trying to tag Lucchinni to swerve away.

Though all of this you fire sporadic beams of tealaser to distract the enemy ships. You don't attempt to fire too many for fear of hitting your allies.

>>18120036
It wasnt "destroyed" it was damaged.
just replace the 3 supports you took out and straighten the roof.
and patch the hole in the floor.

rolled 57 = 57

>>18120080
And revive the beast? MADNESS

>>18120077
So three confirmed kills. Did the ships blow up completely or did they just crash? If they only crashed, some of the Martians might have survived being shot down and we'll have a ground fight on our hands.

>>18120153
Easy:
Let's build a baby Gazebo out of the parts. Paint it pure white.
It will be a good child.

>>18120077
Again Luchinni has herself surrounded.
You watch as Erica takes out 2 of her pursuers,
Perrinne and the p61 in the middle of the tangled ball of combat.

A laser from one of the aliens hits luchinni on the one of her striker units. She's forced to eject it and you see instantly that her performance has suffered.

she flies down towards the tarmac at incredulous speed. Once she's clear of you you shoot the two ships that pursued her to such a low altitude.

Luchinni makes it back to the ground safely. Mechanics and medical crew whisk her off into one of the hangars.

You hear the revving of another striker unit.
Ursula flies out of the hangar holding a pair of oversized guns. "Ursula!" you and Erica call out to her. "Get back, you're not suited for combat."

"I must do what I can do." she answers both of you mentally.

Now both of them are in the fight.

rolled 62 = 62

>>18120175
Ok fuck this we are going up there too.

He the saucers out and prepare to wreck shit

rolled 23 = 23

>>18120175

SHE'S NOT GOING OUT ALONE

Summon saucer, take to the skies!

rolled 94 = 94

>>18120175
WE LIVE TO SERVE.
Help out the lady.

>>18120175
Can we even achieve combat speeds with our saucers?

Probably better to give Ursula support from the ground with our tea laser, using short bursts of time stop to line up our shots.

rolled 86 = 86

>>18120196
>>18120181

OPERATION: PHONE HOME.

Grab a BICYCLE.

rolled 39 = 39

>>18120224

>PHONE HOME

The time has come.

>>18120175
DAMMIT URSULA
Stop her and take her units.
Then Bunnymode and mental crossdressing and FLY LIKE A BUNNY

rolled 14 = 14

>>18120219

You're right.

We need a Bicycle, a ramp, and BALLS OF STEEL.

"goddammit. I cant just sit here idly throwing lasers wildly into the sky."
"THOSE THINGS ARE WAY FASTER THAN OUR FUCKIN SAUCERS." Kraus tells you "YOU FLY NOW AND YOU'RE TOAST."
"But i cant even shoot up at them, I might hit the wtches!"

from the corner of your eye, out to see you see a huge ship flying low over the water. It's also accompanied by multitudes of the smaller fighters that came in from over land.

You see the small forms of several witches fighting off the smaller craft and strafing the huge one.


Looking back to the tangle your twins are in, you see Perrine take a slight hit. Though not enough to make her bail out of the fight, she's now flying shakily.

You quickly make your decision.

{ ]attack huge ship
[ ]protect the twins.

>>18120244
>Balls of Steel
As Duke lost his, we might just as well take them.

rolled 57 = 57

>>18120235
Yes let us show them our might

rolled 80 = 80

PROTECT AND SERVE

>>18120248

Oh shit.

How many are left on the twin's side?

I mean, if it looks like they can handle it, we can do the other one... but I don't want to leave them high and dry.

Can you give us a better tactical assessment? Maybe ask Kraus for his opinion?

rolled 89 = 89

>>18120248

Shoot the big ones.

Broadcast our intent, have them clear the LOS of the Tea laser.

ENERGY CHARGE 100% TEA CANNON FIRE

rolled 63 = 63

>>18120248
Ship + Fighters
It's the more threatening target.

rolled 62 = 62

>>18120248
>>18120268
YEP
WE BE CHARGIN OUR LAZAH

>>18120236
We can't use the regular striker units.
We were only able to fly the one you crashed because you used a separate control unit

[x]attack large ship

Tell the other witches to get away from it and obliterate it with a huge tealaser

>>18120272

inb4 twins die because we didn't protect them.

rolled 67 = 67

>>18120283
NOPE.jpg

We are gonna stop that shit regardless and if they do die we are walking right into the afterlife and start wrecking shit until we get them out

>>18120278
>>18120276
>>18120272
>>18120268

You realize that turning the other way means there's a very real chance the twins DIE right?

Just checking?

Because the closer those guys get, the more effective we're going to be.

I mean, yes them being close is bad, but we could potentially PHONE HOME if they get in range. And I wouldn't bet their fleet against us in a melee with the girls on the line.

>>18120268
You ask Kraus to scan the battlefield.
"22 SMALL FIGHTERS AROUND THE PLANE AND THE 3 WITCHES, PERRINNE DOESNT LOOK TOO GOOD, URSULA CAN BARELY DODGE. THE PLANE AND ERICA ARE DOING WELL."

You then ask about the ship
"32 SMALL CRAFTS AROUND THE BIG ONE, 8 WITCHES. SAKAMOTO SEEMS TO BE LAGGING BEHIND"

rolled 73 = 73

>>18120272
It is to a military man. Attacking the ship is the sound tactical decision.

However, we are not a military man. We are a butler who is watching the twins he considers his girlfriends get thrown into a life-or-death struggle.

Which do you think we would really go for?

>>18120295
we can make our knifes as large as we want, wo they'd be useful in a melee plus everyone seems to forget that we have giant spoons that throw things and giant forks to be used a tridents

>>18120311
go for girls

rolled 29 = 29

>>18120311
22 on 4 is worse odds than 32 on 8, even with the big one there.
Cover Ursula while she covers Perrine.

>>18120311
Single sleeper ship my ass. That's a full-on heavy raid. Where the hell are the RAF and USAAF?

>>18120311
the tangle around the twins is at 5:1 [and two of the combatants there arent in top shape.]

the fight around the large ship is at 4:1, with more witches that could cover each other.

[x]PROTECT THE TWINS

>>18120327
Taken by surprise.
I'm sure the cloud partridges will be around to take the glory once the fighting is almost over.

>>18120319

That's what I meant. We're going to be fucking MURDER in close, but we only have the one ranged ability.

Our best shot is to PHONE HOME, but we need to figure out who we're targeting first.

If we went for the big one, we could take out the heavy.

Ask Kraus if he can do something to help us glide at speed.

>>18120346
Eh, it's been a good 10-15 minutes since the raid started. Plenty of time to scramble.

Maybe they'll come in to save our bacon when shit gets REALLY heavy.

>>18120311
I want to protect the twins, but what can we realistically do for them except provide AA fire?

We can't fly up there, our saucers are too slow.

Aren't there any AA weapons on the ground?
We are physically enhanced. We can carry a Flak cannon.

>>18120434
We can carry one. But how the hell will we be able to fire/load it?

>>18120420
How often can we do our limited teleport?

rolled 28 = 28

>>18120447
5/day

>>18120461
damn

>>18120461
>>18120447
And we just used it once to get to the control tower from the hangars.

So we have 4 uses of the limited teleport left.

rolled 83 = 83

Is everyone forgetting our watch?

Get in close enough to attack time stop set up attacks end KABOOM goodbye enemies

rolled 57 = 57

>>18120314
A butler must maintain a cool head under all circumstances. Above all, he lives to serve, so he must be fully aware of the consequences of his actions. A true butler is a superman, skilled in every task. He must be able to write a play, sing a song, make love, wage war, con a ship, fell a tree, and more, all to please his master.

We assess the situation and take out that goddamn mother ship.

Now that the enemies are in range, anti-aircraft fire from the base's flak cannons yell their anger into the sky.
A tank rumbles out from behind the hangars. It's configuration showing it to be an antiaircraft unit.
In the open gunners seat is Luchinni, firing rounds into the air.

You watch as the Flak cannons along the beach take out some more of the smaller craft around the large one.

The Blackwidow blasts a ship on Ursula's tail.

You must make a decision now.

>brb getting a smoke

rolled 36 = 36

>>18120503
Move up to help the twins use time stop to even the odds against them.

Once we reduce their enemies to a small enough group to be mopped up switch to the main ship and beam the shit out of it

rolled 36 = 36

My suggestion.
FLY UP.
TIME STOP.
RAPE SHIPS IN REACH
Tea lasering those too far to get to.

rolled 85 = 85

[x]attack huge ship

The big ship. It is easier for us to hit it and will free up the rest of the witches who are better suited for dog-fighting.

rolled 63 = 63

>>18120503
DO THIS
>>18120519

rolled 90 = 90

>>18120539
the witches are also dogfighitng around the ship. It has escorts.
Even if we took it out the other witches still need to take the smaller ones

rolled 43 = 43

>>18120503
Help the twins.
Otherwise, we'll all be sad bears.

rolled 49 = 49

>>18120503
Protect the twins.

Fly up, once we get the attention of the Martians, use Time Stop and Za Warudo knives and tea beams, then let time flow again and Martian ships get blown up.

>[x] protect twins

"ERICA! WATCH OUT!" you hear Ursula yell in your mind.
'GODDAMMIT HOLD ON!'
Looking up, you spot a ship cutting across to get at Erica.
YOU MAKE UP YOUR MIND.

Acting fast, you spot an olive-drab bike leaning against a Lamp-post a few feet away.

You stop time.

rolled 19 = 19

>>18120655
>[x] PHONE HOME
AW SHEET

>>18120655
Hayate can go about 80mph or more on a bike regularly so with our speed improvements we should own.

>>18120676
We'd have to be at 400mph to actually make a difference though.

>>18120687
how much of an improvement does bunny mode do?

rolled 76 = 76

>>18120690
3x according to LG

>>18120655

rolled 19 = 19

>>18120655

>>18120655
Protect the twins. Use the silly bike bounce thing to get altitude. As soon as they have things in hand, pwn the fatty.

[80 secs]
Everything within sight freezes, an eerie silence hangs in the air.
Taking a spoon out you enlarge it and jam it into the concrete under the bike and lamppost.

You hurl it all up, lamppost, bike and concrete, in to the craft about to shoot Erica.

it freezes in the air as you stop concentrating on it, a few feet from impacting the hull of the ship.

[75secs]
You Teleport up to Erica, using 2 successive jumps to reach her altitude.

You grab her left hand and pull her into the time stop.
"What?" she looks around.
"just shoot." you order her from the saucer you're standing on, She begins shooting with her right hand. you concentrate on the bullets long enough to get them close to the targets she's chosen

[55secs]
you make your way with erica, as she shoots the enemies along the way across the frozen battlefield to get to Ursula. You grab her And also pull her into the timestop.
You now strain from concentrating to keep them in.
"SHOOT! SHOOT EVERYTHING YOU CAN AIM AT!" you tell them.
The two let loose.

[25secs]
once sure that the twins are now in the clear once you release the stop, you teleport once to the plane. flying the rest of the way on your saucer.

[20secs]
you touch the plane's metal skin and concentrate on the three accupants inside. This pulls them into the timestop. the plane still frozen in the air.

"What the?" Ian asks from his compartment.
"SHOOT! SHOOT THEM ALL!" you yell inside. As you take some forks and enlarge them.

The guns on the Black widow open up. The dorsal turret barking death in the face of the frozen alien ships.
It takes every bit of your concentration to keep the bullets unfrozen long enough to find their targets.

The clock runs out just in time for you to find a place in the sky where no bullets or alium lasers would cross.

Watching from the ground Luchinni sees almost all the ships around the 3 witches and the Blackwidow explode simultaneously, one of them impaled by lamppost from out of nowhere.

On the last of your strengths you fly down on your saucer to the ground.

You activate bunny mode and run to the end of the run way.
Deactivating it, with the huge ship now surely in range you begin to charge your tealaser.

>>18120865
We are going to be blacked the fuck out for weeks.

>>18120865
Everyone give me your power GENKI DAMA!

( inb4 we spend the next 5 quests charging )

rolled 91 = 91

>>18120865
Can help us aim the tea laser for maximum effect?
Like running the calculations and providing us with a holographic aiming reticule?

And we should probably tell the Witches to get clear of our fire.

>>18120898
We need one of those magiakal espresso potion things that we were talkin about before. Heroics as rendered bittersweet if we cannot celebrate them by fucking our girlfriends' brains out afterwards.

>>18120917
>Can help us aim the tea laser
Goddammit, I meant Kraus.

>>18120917
It is a laser and the thing is like, right there.

We should be fine.

>>18120913

HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA.

>>18120923
On the plus side we are pretty much guaranteed to wake up covered in bitches.

You get Kraus to link up with the radios on all the witches around the large one.

"Guys, please trust me on this, But when I give the signal fly as far away from the big one as possible!"

You hear most of the witches consent.


Throwing all of the energy you could into the laser, you bring it to boil.

2 seconds before you fired, you yelled, "NOOOW!"


The witches scatter and you pour all your juice into a huge laser.

It carves it's way across the prow of the black ship, obliterating a path of destruction deep into it.
Then your laser sputters and you black out.

You didnt see the huge core your laser exposed, you didnt witness Mio use her katana to finish it off.
All you knew at that moment was darkness.

>>18120923
Nah we get it's better if they have to wait for us to wake up after saving them.

>>18120822
>no bike fighting
OH YOU GODDAMN TEASE

>diobrando style takedown with guns and a lamppost
ALL IS FORGIVEN

>>18120943
BITCHES FOR HAYATE!!!!

>>18120948
We really need to see to our short circuiting issues ASAP. We keep being big damn heroes and then missing the chance for proper thanks from the ladies.

>>18120948
We have done well! Protected our mistresses, and thereafter, protected their friends. We have done a butler's work today!.

rolled 73 = 73

>>18120970
>protected their friends
Who'll become our mistresses

>>18120822
I like this.
I like this a lot


Much better than that silly bike bouncing

>>18120968
Well we brought that one on ourselves.

I mean we time stopped, bunny moded / hopped, took down a shitton of planes with help and then fired all of ourselves into that laser

I think we are pretty good so far we just of overboard at times

>>18120968
Well, even the Doctor is stumped by our condition. We just need to keep subjecting ourselves to his tests.

>>18121011
Can't be MVP if we don't let our balls hang out on shit like that.

>>18121020
He's not stumped! Stumped implies stuck. No, he's just momentarily puzzled while he's methodically testing to rule out all possibilities. He's perplexed, not stumped.

I sit alone in this cavern, the light from an oil burning lamp shining down upon my work.
For days ive been here. Carving, always carving.

When i was hungry, I ate. When I was thirsty, I ate.

Almost everyone left for vacation, those that remained I do not know.

On the end of my first day here, Mike came.
I showed him around my tunnels, my fortress.


After he left, i went back to carving. Carving always carving

rolled 93 = 93

>>18121011

Most likely, it's a form of atrophy. The more we use our powers, the better we last.

Notice how we did a FUCK of a LOT more with this round then we did Vs. Saint Nick?

We just need to continue using our powers, and it'll take care of itself.

>>18121053

thats not creepy at all.

>>18121053
Unlimited spatial works?

>>18121053
We may have created a monster here gentlemen.

>>18121058
That could be. Most of our peers are used to heavy drains.

>>18121053
When we get back to the Bureau, are we going to discover the dorms flooded with fudge, when Shirou finally snapped and pulled the lever that let loose the flood?

>>18121058
And yet I always have to remind people.

St nick was all of 2 days into our training.

This was 1 week into our training.

We are barely getting a grasp on our powers let alone reaching the boundaries. At this rate we will turn into nanoha x 100 at the rate people seem to want to push ourselves to more and ore power

Ambition is good but let's look at the reality of it for a moment

rolled 10 = 10

>>18121086
How? we filled it with 'rock hard' fudge.

I was thinking more along the lines of some awesome Willy Wonka/ Hayate the combat butler/ Minecraft crossover... thing.

>>18121094
We'll probably hit a wall at some point, don't you worry.

>>18121053
Fuck yeah Dorfrou!

I bet he gifts us a scepter of fudge encircled with bands of almond menacing with spikes of walnut

I just finished another amulet.
It is made of fudge. It menaces with spikes of fudge.
It depicts a rabbit. It depicts a sword.
The sword is piercing the rabbit

Now i carve again. Carving, always carving.

=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-
***Rollem!**

3d100

1st number is what he decorates the amulet with
2nd number is what it depicts.
3rd number is what it depicts.

>>18121094
This is what annoyed me with Nanoha.
90% of Bureau forces use storage devices and can't even fly.
The protagonist are all living WMDs with supersonic flight and intelligent devices that have been trained so much that they can't fight efficiently even with their owners unconscious.

>>18121053
>When i was hungry, I ate. When I was thirsty, I ate.

So he still ate fudge even when thirsty?

also, fucking creepy man.

>>18121119
>can't
>can
Fuck this typo.

rolled 53, 73, 10 = 136

>>18121114

Macadamia.

Teacozy.

SOFTNESSS.

rolled 62, 18, 4 = 84

>>18121114
It's a flowery amulet depicting Sakura, Nanoha and Madoka.

rolled 88, 54, 29 = 171

>>18121114
Rings and Studs
Shirou
Fudge

>>18121114
>It depicts a rabbit. It depicts a sword.
>The sword is piercing the rabbit

Did... did shirou just plan to kill us?

rolled 35, 11, 97 = 143

>>18121114
Fudge
Fudge
Fudge

rolled 40, 41, 8 = 89

>>18121114
So, walnut spikes, depicting a hammer and a tea kettle, the hammer smashing the tea kettle.

>>18121142
Pretty much yeah.

rolled 100, 100, 92 = 292

>>18121114
Elephants
Cats
Elephants

rolled 11 = 11

>>18121153

Either that, or we are about to loose our footman.

>>18121142
Or rape us

>>18121159
holy shit dude

>>18121159
WTF

>>18121159
Holy shit, /tg/ dice loved you

>>18121159
Jesus Christ. Where the hell did he find all that elephant?

>>18121159
>MFW

NO MORE ROLLING.

>>18121149
>>18121138
>>18121132
I finished another amulet.
It bristles with rings of candy. it bristles with studs of nuts.
It depicts a teacozy, It depicts some fudge.
The teacozy is about to cover the fudge.
This comforts me.

I continue carving. Carving, always carving.
Today I think i'll tunnel deeper.

>>18121159
couldn't do that when it's important, oh no, the best 3d100 i've ever rolled, ever seen, for FUCKING SHIROU

>>18121159
incoming mood!

rolled 99 = 99

>>18121186
>Missing x2 Nat100

>>18121186
YOU FOOL

YOU DIG TOO DEEP AND TOO GREEDILY

rolled 61 = 61

>>18121186

Are we going to have his alter-ego bringing some fluff to this as well?

Maybe trying to escape the madness Shirou has wrought?

>>18121159
The start of the third day.
i spent the night carving. Always carving.
I carved a mug last night.
It menaced with elephants of icing.
It depicts a some cats. It depicts some elephants.
The elephant is slaughtering the cats.
This pleases me.

I think I'll go out today.
If not, then ill go back to carving. Always carving.

>>18121200
The /tg dice mock you, as is their way. Only after LG finished writing his post did they deign to grant you dual 100's.
And they shall continue...mocking you.

>>18121217
the thought of SHIROU as the leader of boatmurdered makes so. much. sense.

You open your eyes.
Above you the infirmary's ceiling looms.
You look to your right and find Ursula holding your hand.
You look to your left and find Erica doing the same.

"Good morning girls." you tell them.
They get up off their seats and latch onto you.

>>18121234
I was going to mention that but I thought I was the only one

>>18121264
How long were we out?

rolled 6 = 6

>>18121276

Knowing Hayate:
We might as well be called Rip Van Winkle.

>>18121264
3 ground to air kills (plus a partial on the bigass dread), and one air to air kill with a lamppost. Pretty good for a butler in a warzone for the first time.

>>18121264
So what happened to me this time?

>>18121264
Hug the two girls back, while mentally asking Kraus how long we were out.

>>18121296
Since the lamppost was launched from the ground, wouldn't it still count as a ground-to-air kill?

Still, one kill short of making Ace-in-a-day.

>>18121323
Nah, ground kills don't count. We're a damn good AA gunner, but not an Ace.

Well, not yet.

>>18121336
>>18121323
Didn't we throw a few forks while we were hanging on to the Widow?
Did we make any kills with those?

>>18121323
meh. we're not MC. our concerns are the quality of our tea our lovemaking.
be nice if we were only out for a couple hours this time. passing out (at least chemically) is the body quitting before you can kill it

>>18121344
We were concentrating on maintaining the timestop so the bullets from the twins and the Widow could get going toward their targets.

It was an extremely effective tactic.

>>18121264
You hug them back, they hold you tighter.
"idiotidiotidiot." Erica cries into your chest."You have no idea how worried we were."
Ursula silently adds her own tears to her sister's.

While you held them like that and waited for them to calm down, you asked Kraus. "Hey man, how long was I out?"
"TWENTY FUCKING EIGHT HOURS." he replies. "THE WITCHES ALL TOOK TURNS LOOKING OVER YOU, THAT BLONDE ONE CAME BY THE MOST."

The girls now calmed down you talk to them.
"Hey. How's everybody? Did we have any injuries? Did we lose anyone?"

***ROLL 1d100***

rolled 81 = 81

fffffuuuuu....

rolled 76 = 76

>did we lose anyone
>roll 1d100

rolled 27 = 27

>>18121411
Please Dice Gods

rolled 62 = 62

>>18121411

rolled 75 = 75

>>18121419
ok, not bad

rolled 68 = 68

/tg/ DICEEEE

rolled 36 = 36

Flawless victory, a few dings to the strikers was all

rolled 84 = 84

>>18121440
you mean...

Plenty of high rolls, I think we're good

rolled 2 = 2

>>18121411

rolled 16 = 16

>>18121468
Yeah....
>>18121469

rolled 49 = 49

>>18121469
counter

>>18121411
>blonde one
> there are at least 4 blond girls on the base.

rolled 100 = 100

>>18121411
Hoping that everyone got out fine.

Also, blonde one?
Only blondes I know are Perrine and Eila.
Did the Hound of Gaul actually show some compassion?

rolled 74 = 74

>>18121481
He means Frenchie

>>18121469
Are you kidding me?

>>18121484

>>18121484
>Perrine
>Showing compassion for anyone but Ian or Mio

>>18121411
"We only had a few injuries." Erica explains
"Mio had a dislocated shoulder. Luchinni got a busted ankle from landing with only 1 striker."

"A couple of mechanics got burned when an oildrum got hit by alien laser and exploded." Ursula adds, "but the potion you made before-hand helped a lot."

"How did you manage to fight them off after I blacked-out?" you ask.

"the girls of Isle of Wight Detachment Group flew in to assist us about a minute after you went down.There wasnt much chance for the remaining 20-ish fighters against 15 witches." Erica explains.

>>18121571
That's good then.

Speaking of Luchinni ever notice she seems a lot like Sakura?

>>18121571
"Ah, that's good to hear.
"Nice that my alchemy skills came in handy. So, you get many of these Martian holdouts?"

rolled 84 = 84

>>18121614
This

You review the fight with the twins for a couple of more minutes.
Ursula seemed particularly interested in the Time-stopping capabilities you showed.

"So this watch, if it was fully functional, could also act as a time machine?" she asks as she looks over the casiopeoa.
"yeah, But the Doctor and the watchmaker we met in town said that replacement parts would be hard to get."
"And why is that?" ursula asks you.
"The kook form the watchshop said something about 'dorfs'." Erica tells her twin.


A knock on the door.
Miyafuji walks into the room.


She checks your vital signs and uses some sort of magic xray magic to scan you.
After assuring her taht you are fine she yells out into the hallway, "HE'S ALRIGHT, GUYS!"
And several witches barged into the room.

"Impressive work," Minna tells you, "if you were an enlisted soldier you would have been in line for a promotion, and maybe a medal."

"As a gift for your impressive combat capabilities, I present you this!" Sakamoto says as she places a large bottle of sake into your lap.

Charlotte walks into the room, pushing the olive bike.
"Look what we found by the beach during cleanup! The landing messed it up, but the mechanics managed to fix her up. The radio operator owned this bike, and said you can have it. seeing as how you managed to take down an alium with it."

>>18121741
[x]Remain faithful to Bike-Chan

>>18121741

>>18121741
We need to paint a kill marker on that thing

>>18121766

i second this.

>>18121741
"Ah, I..I was just doing my duty."

rolled 4 = 4

>>18121766
but still graciously accept the gift that they've labored for

>>18121766
No. we accept this battle hardened bike.
It shell be the little brother to our Bike-kun

And we shall name him The FLYING DUTCHMAN

>>18121802
THIS

rolled 91 = 91

>>18121743

Hmmm...
>>18121741
Nope, he's gone to bed.

and speaking of >>18121741
>Sakabroto's sake. YES!!

>>18121821
been 6 minutes from LG to your post, give it a few more

rolled 19 = 19

>>18121857

I had made it about 30 seconds after LG's post. Must have been a Datajam somewhere...

>>18121741
Shit i just realized.

We have a Dorf at the bureau, we created the bastard.

He can make our clock run with fudge parts

rolled 92 = 92

>>18121741
I say it's time to finally drink ourselves stupid.

>>18121882
>Trusting Shirou with anything
>Good idea
Pick one.

>>18121882
>>18121921
How dorfy is he when he's Kurou-san?

>>18121741
Fuck.... we are going to get in soooo much shit for this one.
Or does the Bureau not have laws about affecting the natural order in under developed worlds?

rolled 42 = 42

>>18121950
Um, what? Why would we?

>>18121950
There will be no problem because people knew about magic already.

The rules were no magic in magic less dimensions

>>18121921
Hey if it works I don't care if it was a bad idea

rolled 70 = 70

>>18121950

The Bureau had already contaminated this Dimension.

>We were simply reducing casualties and establishing positive relations with the native population.

>That's our story and we are sticking to it.

>>18121950
Why would we get in trouble?
This is an allied world, we might even get a commendation for helping Bureau-Witch Command relations.

>>18121987
>Plans involving Shirou other than as a detrimental effect
>Working
Once again...

rolled 7 = 7

Happy about my own post.

>>18121990
Say the same thing, and at about the same time.

>Weird.

Everyone that has had a turn to talk to you leaves the room one by one.

Until only she remained.

"I don't know how you did it. I don't know how you managed to destroy the ones directly above me. But the flash of silver I saw was proof enough that you did it."
Perrine says as you and the twins listen.
"I don't know how you, a crazy gazebo wrecking crossdresing pervert, managed to blow up all those enemy fighters about to shoot us all down."
She takes a few steps closer.
"I don't know how you did all of that. But I know you saved all of us. And for that I thank you."
She leans in and gives you a quick kiss on a cheek, much to the twins' surprise and irritation.

She runs out of the room.


"Hayate?" Ursula looks to you in confusion
"Hayate..." Erica looks at you with some anger.

"Please tell me what, if anything, happened between you and Perrine." The bespectacled one asks.
"EXPLAIN YOURSELF AT THIS INSTANT!" the fiery one yells

>>18121977
>>18121988
>>18121990
The prime directive has been breached.
We are not to interfere with primitive cultures.
This is alt WW2 earth. Hayate has 50-60 years of advancements in tech and medicine. Using a time machine he fucked up the natural order.

Admittedly this whole divergence is likely the bureau's fault, but still.

>>18122015
"I went to smooth things over after that first meeting, she squeed over Jakob, and I saved her from the gazebo about to eat her."

>>18122015
Don't know why everyone hates Perrinne so much. She's a real waifu material.

...Oh, and this is not a suggestion for Hayate to say.

>>18122015
She was sitting in a gazebo, unaware of their insidious plot!

rolled 29 = 29

>>18122015

"Eh..? All I did was offer her tea and Major Sakamoto's uniform that I previously wore."

NEXT TIME ON MSQ:
Ceci n'est pas une pipe


New thread tomorrow at 2100 4chan time.

rolled 71 = 71

>>18122015

I tried to apologize for earlier, and got interrupted by the EVIL GAZEBO.

>>18122035
The prime directive was breached when the Bureau got three inductees WITH THE LOCAL GOVERNMENTS PERMISSION.

We did nothing wrong.

>>18122015
We took down some Martians who were about to take her out.

Also Kraus forced a bunnymode on us. Whats with this dimension and liking cross dressing Hayate?

>>18122064
You really think they won't pin this on us? Really?

Is it bad that my knee jerk reaction is"QUICK... Distraction/ Misdirection" before I realized that we hadn't actually did anything wrong?

>>18122035
Can someone post the guidelines mike laid down that show we will not get in trouble for this?

Or LG actually say it so we can stop this being posted?

>>18122071
Hayate crossdresses in ALL DIMENSIONS.
Even the one he never really lived through

Anyone have that perrine-keima photoshop from the earlier thread?

>>18122015
>Perrine kissing us

Welp, Ian's going to be coming for our head.

>>18122083
Well to be fair they saw the ice queen actually thanking us and giving us a kiss.

I would be fucking suspicious as all hell if I was in their position

>>18122109
or maybe giving us a medal...

>>18122094
Congratulations. YOu are now thinking like an anime MC.

-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-
MIKES GUIDELINES:
"you will be given the chance to go back home if you wish. Stargate access will be available to all trainees through-out the vacation."

"you will be allowed to go to a Dimension that's not yours, providing that you will be accompanied by a native."

"Use of majaik infront of witnesses in dimensions where Majaik is not widespread knowledge is discouraged. Your devices will be monitored to look out for such incidents. If you are proven to have done so, and disrupted said dimension, you will be punished by the Bureau accordingly."

"To get back here you need only tell your Devices that you wish to do so. We will pull you in through the Stargate then."
=-=-=-=-==-==-=-=-=-=-=-=-

you guys shoudnt be in trouble.

not until i can plan it out

rolled 62 = 62

>>18122055

This, just for the hilarity and obvious sister jealously fit this will cause.

rolled 71 = 71

>>18122140

>Not Until I Can Plan It Out.

>FUUUUUUUUUUCCCK.

>>18122140
I bet that will coincide with our trip home for bike chan

>>18122224
C'mon, not like that's actually surprising. At least we don't currently have a web of SHIROU encounters to avoid.

>>18122140
Not that hard, mike'd be all "Good job but im going to have to assign you a punishment lesson"

Then we must go do some possible job, in some possible other world, and possibly gain more power.

>>18122289
Not really it depends how much paperwork he has to deal with and how many bribes he has to give to determine how happy he is with our performance.

>>18122057
Is that tonight at 2100, or tomorrow at 2100?

rolled 19 = 19

>>18122935
In 10 hours 2100

>>18123016
I think its more like 7 hours

I just realized. With the 28 hour nap, the third day of our vacation is almost over. I don't think if it was specified whether the vacation opportunity was a Monday to Friday week, a Sunday to Saturday week, or a Saturday to next Sunday week.

Whichever way it is, we're running out of time to save Bike-chan.

I just realized something.
We got Sakura, Nanoha and Madoka in the advanced classes. And even the beginners have insane people like us.

Does that mean full-fledged workers are on Samus' level?
We already saw Santa and the Doctor, but these aren't exactly there for combat. What kind of fucked up large-scale assault and close-combat mass-rape would be in the realm of an actual combatant?

>>18123283
my view of Hayate... never can remember that. my view of Susan thinks the trip home is not nostalgic in any way. maybe in 30 years we can do the vietnam vet visit back, but not now. we in, we get bike, we get out.

>>18123382
old man henderson. PCs that can win Call of Cthululuth. that's the scale